CHAPTER THIRTY SEVEN – A Lesson Learnt The Hard Way
Day by day, time has slowly passed by and life has continued on.
Over the last few weeks, Jughead has slowly begun to find a routine with Bailey, while slotting into her and Betty's routine and daily life.
Meanwhile, as they focus on their daughter -the paramount and most important factor to them- Jughead and Betty have both been working on putting their own feelings for each other to the side, placing their little girl over themselves as they fight their residual feelings for one another, all the while knowing that the other feels the same way, too.
Not for the first time recently, Jughead has found himself spending the entire day with the mother-daughter duo today. Initially, Betty had invited him over for breakfast pancakes. Then, the two of them took their daughter to the park, followed by getting ice-creams together, then reading a handful of books to the three-year-old on the lounge, before putting Bailey down for her long-overdue day nap, with Betty offering Jughead to stay for dinner with them.
Upon finding themselves with some alone time to kill as two friends now that their daughter is fast asleep, Betty has pulled out the photo albums and scrapbooks. After all, a few times just lately Jughead has asked her about seeing old photos, finally feeling ready to see what he missed out on.
While the young mum seldom enjoys free time, one way that she does spend it is on choosing and printing photos of her and her daughter's life, along with decorating and embellishing the odd page here and there.
In the beginning of the photo album, there are a few short pages that condense some highlights from the first sixteen years of Betty's own life, including a few appearances from Jughead. However, the photo album really begins with the photo that comes twelve weeks after the photos from Jughead's seventeenth birthday party, ten weeks after the photos of homecoming when Jughead left a broken-hearted Betty. Really, the photo album begins with the twelve week ultrasound picture of a fetus.
Then, as he turns the pages one by one, Betty leans a little into Jughead in order to look over his shoulder at the photos and memories of her life that she knows well.
As they look over the majority of the photos early in Betty's pregnancy and for approximately the first four months after Jughead left, her growing stomach is barely evident in the photos and is very easily disguised or hidden by a particular outfit or a certain angle.
Turning the pages, time rolls on throughout Betty's pregnancy many, many times faster than it did for her when she was experiencing it in reality. Among these photos of the normal seventeen-year-old girl's life, there's another ultrasound photo that is far clearer and easier to identify than the first. Then, in the other photos on that same page, Betty seems to be on the other side of the camera. This continues on for the following few pages, showing pictures of the small nursery that she had set up for Bailey, pictures of her newborn niece and nephew, a few photos of her friends, followed by photos of the decorations, set up and group of people at her baby shower.
Turning the page, Jughead is presented with a number of posed pictures that showcase her baby belly. Several appear to be from her baby shower as she poses alone cradling her baby belly, then with her mum, her sister, the both of them and then Veronica.
Then, on the very bottom of the page there's a single picture that her mother had taken of a hot, bothered and enormous Betty just a few days before she gave birth to Bailey.
Jughead's breath hitches. It's the first time that he's really seeing the physical evidence of her carrying their daughter for nine months. It's confronting.
After all, it's the same Betty that he left, it's the Betty that he knew, it's the Betty that he spent thinking about and picturing during his four years away and yet here he is looking at that Betty who even with the smile on her face looks so young, so scared and so pregnant with their baby. She looks way too young to be in the state that she was in, thanks to him.
"I'm so sorry, Betty... You were so young. You were way too young to have to do that, to be pregnant, especially all on your own... I am so sorry."
Betty gives Jughead a sad smile. She appreciates his apology. She knows he means it. She appreciates the fact that he's here, now. But, Betty can't forget the way she felt throughout those photos and over the last four years. She can't just brush it off as no problem and no big deal.
"Thank you. I know you're sorry. I know you would have been there if you could... I wish you were."
Betty sighs heavily and Jughead tries to swallows the lump of guilt that is growing in the back of his throat. Then, glancing at the photo album where the smile on her face doesn't quite reflect the way that she felt, Betty speaks up somberly.
"It wasn't easy. Every day I asked myself whether I was doing the right thing for me, for Bailey... Some days it felt impossible. Some days it still feels impossible. But, those days pass and slowly I've gotten through it..."
Betty gives Jughead the smallest of smiles as she reaches across him, closing the space between them that little bit more before she turns the page and continues speaking.
"... And without those bad days, you don't get the really, really good days like these."
Jughead turns his attention from watching Betty intently as he had been, to looking to the page that is out and open in front of him.
This page is almost entirely covered with photos from the day Bailey was born. It's filled with photos of the tiny newborn taken at almost every angle, featuring several with the mother and daughter together, followed by one with her maternal grandparents and then lastly a photo with Jughead and Betty's friends holding their baby.
Betty watches as the smile on Jughead's face grows as he examines each page intently, studying it before moving onto the next as he sees little tiny snippets from their daughter's life that he had missed out on.
They sit like this in silence as Jughead closely examines each page of the photo album before turning to the next while Betty's gaze flits between the page and him. However, after doing so for several minutes, Jughead stops on one page in particular for a little longer than all the others, as his attention is fixed on one photo...
It's actually one of Betty's favourite photos of her daughter. It's a beautiful picture of Bailey at around age two, one that Betty had taken during one of many visits to the playground.
The little girl is looking up at her mother who's holding her phone or her camera –whatever she used on the day- wearing the biggest grin that just radiates across her face, reflecting her absolute delight in that moment. It's the sort of photo that you can't help but smile at.
Then, as Jughead turns to Betty, catching her watching him with a little smirk, Jughead quickly glances back at the photo album and the one photo in particular that has inspired Jughead's statement that follows.
"We made her, Betts."
A little swarm of butterflies madly swirl through Betty's stomach just from Jughead's four, simple words that leave her swooning.
"That we did, Jughead Jones" is all that Betty manages to gently utter with a soft smile to the man beside her.
"It's crazy how two reckless teenagers could make something so, damn incredible. Bailey was one hell of an accident..."
Betty giggles at Jughead's manner of putting their daughter's existence in a way that is so blunt, yet filled with so much affection.
Then, just as she opens her mouth to reply, the young mother is silenced by the familiar sound of tiny footsteps trailing down the hallway and into the kitchen as a little blonde girl, the perfect blend of the two young adults who are sitting in the lounge room together, comes out, looking for her mother.
"Mummy?"
"I'm down here, baby" Betty coos gently, poking her head out from where she and Jughead are sitting side-by-side on the floor of her lounge room, surrounded by photo albums.
Immediately the little girl heads for Betty, developing a tunnel vision focus on her mother's open arms.
"Did you have sweet dreams, beautiful girl?" Betty asks gently as she whispers into Bailey's hair.
Betty feels her daughter's silent nod in response as she slowly wakes up from her sleepy state. So, knowing that Bailey takes a little while to wake up and warm up from a nap, Betty doesn't ask anymore questions, just holding her daughter while she rocks her in her arms.
Once again, Jughead leans over and whispers into Betty's ear as he reaches out to gently ruffle their daughter's hair with a little grin.
"We made her."
#
After gradually waking up from her nap, it's not long at all before Bailey is back to her bright and cheery self as she sits there with her parents.
Upon realising that the photo albums are out on the lounge room floor surrounding her parents, Bailey insists that they keep looking through them. After all, it's something that the little girl enjoys doing, even on her own. In fact, quite frequently Bailey would pull out the books and albums that are far too big for her, hauling them onto her lap as she flips through the pages, trying to spot familiar faces or giggling with a touch of narcissistic delight upon seeing her own face appearing on a recurring basis throughout the photos.
Sitting there watching as the three-year-old flips through the happy snaps and points out herself, her mother, her beloved Grandpa, her Aunty V and Uncle Archie, her other set of grandparents, her Aunty Polly and her cousins, Betty notes one notable absence from the photos, knowing that the only photos of Jughead are from the short collection of photos from Betty's pre-Bailey years.
"I need one of you and her in here" Betty whispers to the man beside her with a nudge. "Maybe one of the three of us might be nice, too."
Jughead smiles at Betty's suggestion despite her knowledge of his utter disdain for photos of himself.
After Betty's comment, the three of them continue looking over the old photos together for a little while with Bailey adding the occasional commentary or remark. This continues for half an hour or so before something on a particular photo stands out to the little three-year-old, prompting a question that has just occurred to her.
"Do mummies and daddies have a mummy and daddy?"
Betty is the first to answer her daughter as she looks down to the little girl whose big, blue eyes are looking between her parents in search of the answer to her question.
"Yeah, Bailey-girl... Your Nanna and Granddad are my mummy and daddy."
Bailey nods at her mother's answer before turning to her father.
"Do you, daddy?"
"Your Grandpa is my daddy, silly... You knew that" Jughead teases gently, reaching out to gently tickle the little girl's belly.
Bailey giggles for a moment after Jughead's tickle before she returns to her initial question, seeking furthe clarification.
"And do you have a mummy?"
"Of course I do... But my mummy lives very, very far away from here with my little sister. Maybe one day you can meet them."
Bailey, ever the little social butterfly, smiles brightly at the idea and her father's suggestion before returning to her photo albums. Jughead too returns his attention to the photos that he's seeing for the second time today, but not before noting the puzzling look on Betty's face.
After all, as she exhales a sigh and bites the corner of her lip, Betty's mind is elsewhere as she casts her thoughts back to the day when she waited until both of her parents were out of the house before she crept downstairs and took a seat beside her families landline phone...
A little over four years ago...
Listening to the dial tones that leaves her on edge and growing that little bit more nervous and apprehensive with every ring, Betty can feel the knot in her stomach rapidly continuing to grow and intensify.
To distract herself, Betty fidgets with the small piece of paper that she had transcribed the contact details of Gladys Jones onto when FP had relayed his exes details to Betty through his prison cell upon one visit.
As she sits and waits nervously, Betty thumbs the piece of paper in her fingers, folding it over and over again as she forms little creases into it.
Then, Betty feels her chest seize up and her heart pound to a nervous beat as the rhythm of the phone ringing is interrupted by a single word from a voice that Betty hasn't heard in several years.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Mrs. Jones..." Betty begins. While she would go on to continue speaking and explaining, her voice comes out short, fading away before she has a chance to continue talking beyond her initial three words.
"Who is this?" is the speaker's initial question, coming out a little blunt as Gladys tries to recognise the voice in three short words while feeling a little thrown by the title that she has just been addressed as. After all, Betty is not to know that Gladys Jones had slowly reverted to using her maiden name roughly eighteen months ago.
"My name's Betty Cooper... I don't know if you remember me...You know my parents, Hal and Alice Cooper. I'm Jughead's girlfriend."
The last comment surprises Betty herself as the title that she refers to herself by slips from her lips, addressing herself as Jughead's other half despite not having seen the boy that she loved and the boy who left her in over four months.
Then, while just moments ago Betty couldn't get more than three words out before losing her voice and her nerve, now Betty begins to babble on nervously, spewing out all the information and the detail she can as she hopes that at least one thing will jolt a connection in the middle-aged woman's mind and she can move onto the reason behind her call. However, Betty is oblivious to the fact that she had succeeded in her mission from the moment that she uttered her name.
"I know who you are, hi Betty. How can I help you?"
Gladys asks over the line, finding the most tactful way to cut to the chase and find the reason behind why the young girl is calling her out of the blue.
"I'm sorry for calling... Mr. Jones gave me your number, I hope that's okay. Firstly, I was just wondering if you've seen or heard anything from Jughead since he left Riverdale?"
Betty knows that FP has relayed the fact that previously Gladys had told him that she hadn't seen or heard anything from their son since his abrupt departure from Riverdale. However, Betty has to begin with that question for her own peace of mind, needing to know if the answer to that question has changed on the very small chance that it has.
"No, I'm sorry, Betty, but I haven't heard from him. I told his father that I would tell him if I did..."
Betty feels something within her plummet at the smidgen of hope that she had been carrying to hear a different answer is dashed and banished. Then, Betty continues speaking, almost pleading as she implores her ex-boyfriend's mother to share any details she may have on his whereabouts.
"I'm worried about him, Mrs. Jones, and it's really important for me to find him. So, please, if you know anything..."
There's a sigh across the phone line before the middle-aged woman continues to speak passively.
"It sounds like he needed a fresh start and a clean slate. And, honestly, I can relate to that. I think moving away may have done him the world of good."
"I really need to find him, Mrs. Jones. You see-"
Betty's voice crackles and breaks for just a moment as she feels her hand falling to her stomach that is just beginning to notably swell a little, protectively.
It's a habit that she's found herself falling into a number of times just lately. Sometimes it's during the arguments with her parents, feeling as though she's protecting and touching her baby. Then, other times it's as though she's absorbing the comfort that she needs from her baby. Either way, Betty finds herself with her hand back on her belly as she struggles to speak up.
"... I also called to tell you that I'm carrying your grandchild, Mrs. Jones. I'm having Jughead's baby."
There is a very long pause and silence over the phone. Betty nips at her lip nervously, her thumb rubbing the smallest circles from where it is resting against her abdomen as the grandmother-to-be finally speaks up.
"Oh..."
"Look, Jughead doesn't know about our baby yet. So, I would really, really appreciate knowing if you hear anything from him or if you learn anything about where he is..."
As she trails off, Betty waits out the extended pause, understanding the weight of the news that she has just relayed to the woman over the phone, revealing that she is set to become a first-time grandmother. The , after the extremely long and extended pause, Betty can't take the silence anymore as she speaks up over the phone once again.
"Mrs. Jones? I also wanted to call to tell you that you and Jellybean are welcome to be involved in our baby's life. In fact, it would mean a lot to me for him or her to have their family in their life... However, I understand that this must come as a really big shock to you, so you're welcome to take some time to think about it, but-"
Betty is cut-off mid-sentence as Gladys speaks up with far more conviction and confidence than she had when she uttered the one, single word after Betty informed her that she's carrying her grandchild.
"Thank you for the offer, but that won't be necessary. Jellybean and I won't be involved in its life."
Betty can feel her jaw drop and her heart sink as she listens to her unborn baby's grandmother. She hadn't known exactly how Jughead's mother would respond to her news, but nothing had really prepared Betty for what she is sitting there hearing over the phone.
"Are you sure? You don't have to answer me right away..." Betty tries, hoping for a response that is even just little more gentle and different from Gladys's initial one. However, unfortunately Betty receives no such thing as the other woman speaks up once again.
"Yes, I'm sure. Thank you for your call, Betty, but my daughter and I are fine as we are and I ask that we have no contact with either of you."
With that, the phone call ends instantly and abruptly, leaving Betty to listen to an outdrawn, beeping dial tone that notifies her that the other caller has hung up, as if she didn't already know...
Feeling her emerald green eyes begin to fill with glassy tears, Betty fights them back, inhaling her sniffle as she sits back on her seat beside the telephone. Her hand is still protectively cupped on her tiny, burgeoning baby belly, hurting for her unborn baby whose father doesn't even know that they exist, along with a grandmother who has rejected the offer of having any contact with them...
#
"Betty."
Jughead's voice instantly causes Betty to look up and over to him from across the room as he trails towards her where she's chopping bacon for the carbonara as the pasta is brought to the boil in the saucepan beside her.
After Bailey's innocent question, Betty had been quick to find an excuse to flee the room, informing the father and daughter that she might make dinner a bit earlier tonight. However, her quick escape didn't fool Jughead who similarly waited for an excuse which came when he put a movie on for Bailey before following after Betty who had left the room ten minutes or so earlier.
"Something's up, isn't it? What aren't you telling me?" Jughead asks gently as he leans his back against the cupboard right alongside where Betty is chopping busily.
Pausing from her work for a moment, Betty's green eyes glance up at him briefly, assessing the situation, her options and the idea of telling him before she glances away again with a sigh as she continues her chopping in silence.
"Betts, come on... I saw your look when Bailey was asking us about our parents. Is it your mum and dad? What's your mum done this time? Or is it my parents? Has my dad said something to you? What about my mum? Do she and Jellybean even know that we had Bailey?"
Exhaling a sigh of resignation, Betty puts her knife down on the chopping board and washes her hands as she buys herself a little time before returning to the bench that she had been standing at before, turning herself to face Jughead this time.
"It's about your mum, Jug... Yes, she knows that we had Bailey. Because, years ago, I asked FP for her details. When I was about four and a half months pregnant, I called her asking if she had any idea of where you were or if she'd heard from you. Really, I was calling her to tell her that I was pregnant."
Jughead nods, his face neutral as he remains silent. It's as if he senses that there's more to the story and he is trying to prompt Betty to continue explaining. Then, after glancing up to him to analyse his expression with concern, Betty proceeds with her story after ensuring that he was doing okay thus far.
"I wanted to call her because I figured that she deserved the right to know that we were making her a grandma. So, I called her and I asked her if she was interested in having any part in her grandchild's life. I wanted her to know that she was always welcome to be involved in our baby's life."
Jughead's eyebrows begin to furrow seriously as he begins to get a fair idea of what Betty is telling him, managing to draw some fairly strong conclusions. Yet, he clings to the tiny bit of hope that he has left as he looks to her and utters one single word.
"And?"
With a pained sigh, Betty glances up at Jughead as her hand reaches out to touch his arm soothingly in a feeble attempt to counteract what she has to tell him next.
"I'm so sorry Juggie, but she rejected her... While I don't know if your sister knows that Bailey exists, your mum told me that she and Jellybean wouldn't be having any contact with either of us... She didn't want to know Bailey."
Jughead's heart slowly sinks as the little piece of hope that he'd been holding onto is crushed with Betty's explanation.
However, despite what she's said and what she's just told him, he goes to open his mouth and ask another question. Betty knows exactly what is coming next, anticipating his question that he is about to raise and cutting him off before he has a chance to ask it.
She knows that he's looking for some loophole, he's looking for the 'but' and he wants to believe some excuse. Can you blame him? But, while she hates being the bearer of bad news, Betty realises that in this instance clutching at straws is the sort of thinking that does no one anyone favours, nor does sugar-coating the truth of the matter.
"I thought that maybe she was just having a bad day that day, maybe she just needed a bit more time to think about it. So, after Bailey was born, I sent her out this little keepsake card that I'd been giving to people who sent cards and gave gifts as a little thank you. It was just like a little birth announcement card with a photo of Bailey with her details on it. So, even though they didn't send anything, I decided to send two out; one for your mum and one for Jellybean. I also sent my phone number in case she ever changed her mind... Anyway, a week or so later, the envelope turned up in the letterbox again. It had been opened, resealed and then marked return to sender... I'm so sorry that I can't tell you something different, Juggie."
As Betty runs her hand up and down his arm, stepping over the line in order to comfort him in that moment, Jughead's disposition quickly changes from feeling hurt over his mother's actions to seeing red...
Jughead is furious.
He's furious with his mother for rejecting him; for taking his sister and leaving him... He's furious with his mother for rejecting his daughter, her granddaughter... He's furious with his mother for rejecting his beautiful little girl, just like she rejected him.
#
Jughead tries to suppress his feelings and push them to the back of his mind for the remainder of his night during dinner and dessert and until after he's given Bailey a hug goodnight.
Then, as soon as he leaves the mother and daughter's apartment, Jughead pulls his phone out on his walk back to the trailer as he storms along angrily. He is quick to find the number that he hadn't touched in years, tapping it before holding his phone up to his ear as he waits for the familiar voice to pick up.
"Hi mum. It's me. I'm doing alright. Thanks for not asking" Jughead begins, getting his initial sharp greetings out before his mother barely even has a chance to register who is on the other side of the phone.
Then, Jughead barely allows Gladys to get a 'hello' in before he cuts her off again, continuing to utter his thought-out speech that he'd spent the evening stewing over and preparing.
"I've been talking to Betty today... I know that she was kind enough to offer you the opportunity to be involved in our daughter's life, but consider that offer revoked - for good. You aren't the sort of person I ever want to introduce into my little girl's life when you selectively care about family and you can't give a damn for your son and only granddaughter."
There's the briefest of pauses as Jughead swallows painfully before continuing to speak. There's less anger but more hurt this time.
"I don't get it, mum. I honestly don't know how you could do what you've done... I abandoned my daughter unknowingly. I missed out on the first three years of her life and I don't know if I'm ever going to get over that and be able to forgive myself... I don't know if I can. So, I honestly can't understand how you could."
As Jughead takes a breath, Gladys is quick to try to and speak up in response to her son's serving of the cold, hard truth. However, he speaks up and over her through the line, continuing with his speech and getting everything that he feels he needs to say out in the open.
"No, mum... No. I don't want to hear your excuses and whatever it is that you tell yourself in order to be able to sleep at night and justify your decisions as a parent to yourself. No matter what your excuses are, it's not okay. So, whatever the hell you were going to say, I don't want to hear it."
Jughead pauses for another brief moment, taking a deep breath to prepare himself for the remainder of the message that he is attempting to give to his mother before he continues speaking. This time, Gladys isn't game enough to speak up and interrupt her son.
"Look, I do want to thank you for what I've learnt from you in parenting my own daughter, though... When you left and when you stepped down, dad stepped up. Sure, he was terrible at it, abysmal, even, for a while there, but he tried. He was there. For that, he has my respect and he has a damn good relationship with his granddaughter who looks up to him like he hung the moon and stars. So, while it might be too late for us, I do thank you for what I've learnt from you when it comes to being a parent. I know I didn't win the parental lottery but something that I was insecure about was being a poor parent and not being good enough for my daughter. However, while I hope to do a damn lot better than just being there, in the very least I know that any effort, even the worst, is better than none at all."
I'd love to know your thoughts on that chapter and Gladys. I hope you all enjoyed the dash of family fluff before things took a turn, too. I'm also interested in your thoughts on the flashback and flashbacks in general. I personally love to write flashbacks so let me know if you'd like me to incorporate more and if you have any requests of what you'd like to see.
Anyway, do you reckon I've subjected poor Jughead to enough pain yet? While I've made her pretty damn harsh, I feel like it's not that much of a stretch after she left one child and took the other. Even if it was out of guilt for abandoning Jughead, Gladys making a similar decision felt more believable to me than when she and Jellybean come back and it's all just happy families, like the Jones family didn't crumble the way that it did. Now, apologies to the people that have asked about Gladys and/or Jellybean along the way. I'm sorry for the coy, half-answers because I've had that planned all along and was just waiting to slot the reason why there'd been no real mention of them in the story before then.
Big thank you and shout out to violet1429, JugBet, Marie King, hopelessromantic618, and Bughead4Life for reading and reviewing the last chapter of my story. I really appreciate the feedback!
Next chapter: Enjoy a diabetes-inducing amount of fluff-with-feelings when Betty and Bailey invite Jughead over for their movies and pizza night that works wonders.