"Obi-wan."
Kind gentle blue eyes stared down at him, as he suddenly realized his own eyes were open, listlessly gazing up into a bright white, though soft light.
Then his heart slammed in his chest, gut wrenching with a mixture of fear and exhilaration. "I-I don't understand," Obi-wan stammered, moving to sit up. The kind face he had missed for too many years drew back to give him room. Though the man wasn't completely how he remembered. His long silver hair had become a mousy brown. His pronounced wrinkles had been smoothed over, though not gone entirely. "You're-"
"Dead? Yes." Qui-gon said apologetically with a sad smile.
Obi-wan felt tears of grief well in his eyes. "Then I'm dead, too…"
"No. Not yet. Though you will be soon, if you don't fight hard enough." Qui-gon said with a gentle warning in the cadence of his voice.
Obi-wan let out an exasperated sigh of surprise and relief, then turned serious again as he remembered. "Anakin," he said, both a statement and a question.
"He is alive for the moment, but just barely. Same as yourself. Though his fate will be the same as yours." Qui-gon said matter-of-factly though not at all harshly or unkind. Everything about the man was gentle and fatherly.
"I don't understand," Obi-wan said, the sorrow of his entire life falling from his shoulders, piercing the depths of his heart. Every bit of it, felt a hundred times over. A tear spilled delicately over the rim of his eye. "Master, I'm scared," Obi-wan confessed.
Qui-gon gave one of his soft knowing stares. "I'm sorry Obi-wan," he said in sorrow. "I wish I had time to tell you everything. But if you and Anakin are to live, you must leave this place. Besides the two of you still have much work to do."
"What do you mean, the Sith are all dead, aren't they?" The Sith had been slain. Surely Anakin had brought about the balance to the force, as was prophesied.
"There is still much darkness to contend against." Qui-gon said grimly. "In time you will come to understand. Though I wish it were not so." His words were shaded with a color of remorse and pain.
But hadn't they already done enough? Obi-wan had given everything he had to give. The rest had been taken. Anakin, he could hardly bear the thought of the man having to endure any more at the hands of evil.
"But I'm not a Jedi anymore. Even Anakin has given up on the order. We're failures," Obi-wan said, his words laden with self directed guilt and shame.
We're failures and it's all my fault.
"The war of light and dark is bigger than the Jedi," Qui-gon said with strong conviction. "The role you and Anakin play, is perhaps even more important. Without your and Anakin's sense to stray from the code, you would never have caught the Sith lord in time. That much I have seen."
Straying from the code. Yes, his master must have seen everything. All that he had done, how low he had fallen. The sick yellow gold in his eyes in that horrid place. The way he enjoyed taking the lives of the ones who had hurt Anakin so badly- the ones who had made him watch while his love suffered. He would have seen how weak he had been, to be overcome with lust for his own padawan learner. How he hurt him so terribly.
"No," Obi-wan said. It was reflexive. But his master had to be wrong. Not only was he unworthy, but he didn't have any more fight in him. "I can't do anymore. I can't face any more darkness without being taken by it myself. I've come too close to the dark already. You've seen it."
"Obi-wan, you've never disappointed me. I'm proud of you. Your path has been wrought with pain and suffering. I know it's hard, but in the end, at every turn you choose the light, even while tempted by darkness. Any lesser man would have fallen." Qui-gon said gently, lifting up Obi-wan's chin to meet his gaze.
The words cut through straight to the hollow core of his pain and regret. "But after all the things i've done… how can you say that?"
"Because I've seen your heart. I know you're a good man, Obi-wan. You do what's right. Just like you will continue on to do so. I've seen that, too." Qui-gon said, a full smile gracing his kind features. "Now hurry, you must go. Our time is running short."
Obi-wan's eyes spilled more tears. "I've missed you so much," he lamented, heart breaking. "I don't want you to go again. Since you've been gone everything's been so hard," he said, feeling once again like the padawan he had been all those years ago.
The pain of his master's death still weighed heavy on his heart. It had been something he never really let himself feel. Because there was no death, only the force. But his master had been gone all the same. He had been left alone to train Anakin, he had hardly been ready for it.
"I know Obi-wan, I know. I've been with you through it all. Just as I will continue to be." Qui-gon said kindly, sadness in his eyes. "We will meet again."
Then, the white lights around them faded to black, until the darkness was all he could see. "Qui-gon," Obi-wan called out frantically, "Qui-gon!"
He heard nothing, only the sound of his own voice. Then, even that ceased to exist as he drifted back, a heavy fatigue falling into his spirit. Suddenly now he came aware of his body, how he had become broken and lacerated. He felt, tired. Though he remembered what his master had told him.
His fate will be the same as yours.
So he would try his very best to stay alive. For Anakin. Though Obi-wan wondered what that really meant. He had heard something similar once before, from the lips of that dreaded Sith lord.
The two of you, your fates, they are woven into the fabric of the universe. For better or worse, you will never escape one another.
For better or for worse...
Though he had little time to contemplate it, as he felt himself fading fast. With every ounce of strength he had, he tethered himself to life. He could feel other forces aiding him, crystals placed on different parts of his body, the soft presence of his master, guiding him back to life. He focused his efforts on staying alive, sinking into his healing trance with detrimental intention.
The next time he opened his eyes, he saw his surroundings; one of the small med rooms in the hall of healing. He had no sense of how long he had been there, or how he had even ended up there at all. Anakin must have gotten then out somehow, he thought.
He was grateful to be alive as he stretched out his limbs, feeling weak, but no pain in his body as he moved. Obi-wan slowly sat up, looking around for a change of fresh clothes. Thankfully, a set of his Jedi tunics had been laid out on the small dresser across the room.
As he tore off the white med gown and donned his familiar garbe, he breathed deeply, taking in the scent of freshly washed clothes, ones that had been laundered in the temple. They had a distinct aroma to them, the same scent that would have been on his bed sheets. It was comforting, giving him the feeling of being safe.
Once he was totally clothed, he wandered out into the main hall. Clearly it was late at night, or very early in the morning. Whichever it was, the space was empty, all but for two healers who wandered the hall, checking on various patients who might have needed their attention.
He didn't have to ask to know which room Anakin was in, as he could feel his signature in the force. Just like always, his aura was huge and overwhelming. Though now he eminated the steady calm of peaceful rest. The thought of it brought a smile to Obi-wan's face.
As he entered Anakin's room, he wasn't surprised to see Ahsoka sitting, slumped over in one of the chairs asleep. Another smile graced his lips as he put a warm hand on her shoulder. For the moment, things felt like they had so long ago. Ahsoka alongside himself, waiting for Anakin to break out of his healing trance, just as if it were any other day during the war.
Only war time was over now. For how long, Obi-wan wasn't sure. He had thought that after the Clone wars, after the death of the Sith, the galaxy would be at peace. How long? He hadn't guessed. One hundred years? At least long enough for him to grow old and pass on into the force. Though from what his master had warned, there was something new awaiting them. He could only hope and pray it would be far enough in the future for them to regain some sense of normalcy in their lives. Whatever that might be, if it even existed for people like them.
But for now he wouldn't dwell on it. After all, his master had always tried to get him to stay in the moment, to focus on the here and now. In the soothing company of Anakin and Ahsoka, it was an easy task.
"Obi-wan!" Ahsoka shouted as she had slowly came to awareness, throwing her arms around his torso in a joyful embrace. "You're awake!"
"Yes, indeed I am." Obi-wan let out a small laugh, giving the top of her head a pat.
"I'm so glad. For a while things were looking pretty grim. Vokara Che even said you might not make it. But I knew you would." She said drawing back from their hug and standing next to him.
"I am grateful for your faith. I'm even more grateful that you were right," Obi-wan said in a dry chuckle. "How long have we been here?" He asked, not having the slightest inkling of how long it had been.
"Nearly a month, and a long one at that. Now that the war is over, I've just been sitting in here with you two, spending nights in this chair at Anakin's bedside, hoping for you both to wake up. It's been quite boring to be honest," she said, feigning a yawn.
"How did we get here? How did anyone even know where we were?" Obi-wan asked, suddenly very curious.
"I felt Anakin was in trouble, thankfully I happened to be close by. Master Plo lent me a squadron of clones to go and find him. We found you both crashed in the twilight a mile or so out of the epicenter from a radioactive blast. We just barely made it in time." Ahsoka said in a more grim tone as she wandered over the memory of seeing both her masters lie out on the crumpled up durasteel floor of the mangled ship.
"You're always coming to our rescue it seems," Obi-wan said in an upbeat tone, a gripping feeling taking over his stomach only moments after as he remembered her rushing to their aid on that separatist cruiser all those months ago. How she had called in support for them back on Naboo, when he had all but been overwhelmed by his rage and lust for revenge. Now it felt like another life.
"Yeah well someone's got to. Both of you are just magnets for trouble." Ahsoka chided in a friendly tone.
Obi-wan looked down at her in seriousness. "Thank you," he said, fleeting tears glossing over his eyes for a moment as his brows furrowed against them.
"No need to get so sentimental," Ahsoka said, giving him a playful punch on the arm. "It's just what you do for family."
Family.
In a sense, it's what they were, wasn't it? They were an odd bunch, but it felt right. Anakin. Ahsoka. Family.
Suddenly Obi-wan's throat constricted, feeling all to close to giving into a bout of sobs. He couldn't understand why. Was he sad? He didn't think so. Was it happiness? After so long living void of the emotion, it was overwhelming to him. True unadulterated happiness. The people in this room with him right now were the ones that mattered most to him in the entire galaxy. He would do anything, for either of them.
And that's all that mattered. He vowed he would honor that, to care for them as they had cared for him during his time of need. It was all he could do. It was all he wanted, all he needed. If he had his family, he would be alright. Just as it always had been, only now for the first time he could see it, really see it. Appreciate it for how wonderful it was, how beautiful and precious. He promised, he would never let them slip through his fingers again. Never push them away.
Too long he had been afraid of it, the attachment he felt. So long he had been told it was wrong to harbor such emotions. So he tried, he tried so desperately to stifle it, to quell how he felt. But that was no way to live. He couldn't do it anymore if he tried. There was no reason to.
"Obi-wan, are you alright?" Ahsoka said, looking over at him worried, as a few rogue tears had escaped the carefully held pools that welled in his eyes.
He couldn't speak, he couldn't breathe. All he could do was shake his head yes and bring her into an embrace, as he was so thankful. Thankful for all that he had, for the ones that had loved him when he didn't know how to love anymore. Thankful for the ones that taught him how to love, when he didn't know how anymore.
….
Two days after Obi-wan had awoken, Anakin still lie comatose in his healing trance. Obi-wan and Ahsoka sat by his bedside religiously each day, waiting for him to return to them. As midday neared on the second day, Obi-wan began to feel anxious.
Obi-wan twiddled his thumbs in his lap, looking over at the beautiful man who lie on the sleeper across from them. "I don't know Ahsoka, maybe I shouldn't-"
"Why not? Don't be crazy Obi-wan you have nothing to be afraid of." Ahsoka scolded him softly.
"I'm just so kriffing nervous," Obi-wan chuckled, wiping his sweating palms on his leggings as he sat on the edge of his seat.
"Language!" Ahsoka said, laughing and surprised. It was a rare occasion to hear Obi-wan Kenobi use a curse. "Wow you must be really nervous to be talking like that!" She continued laughing for a moment.
"Yeah well I feel like my chest might explode," he said uneasily. In fact as the moment drug on, he was beginning to feel rather nauseous as well.
"You're going to be just fine, Obi-wan," she said as reassuring as she knew how.
Obi-wan took a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves. It did little to help, though it calmed his stomach for a moment.
"Oh force, I don't think I can do it," he said, standing up and pacing the floor of the small med room.
"Yes you can," Ahsoka said on the edge of annoyance.
Obi-wan turned to her, face contorted with fear. "But what if-"
"I'm going to stop you right there. That's not going to happen and we both know it." Ahsoka said, standing and crossing her arms before her chest.
"What if it's too soon?" Obi-wan countered in a heartbeat, the words ruminating in his mind endlessly, driving him mad.
"You're worrying yourself sick for nothing, Obi-wan. It's not too soon. And if it is? So what. Then you wait. Nothing changes, really. You're overthinking it." Ahsoka said matter-of-fact.
Obi-wan took another deep breath, pulling his hand over his face. She was right, he knew it. But it did little to still his nerves. "You're right, you're right. I still feel like i'm going to die," he said, letting out a nervous laugh as a few tears of fear welled in his eyes.
Then Anakin stirred in his sleeper. Oh force he's waking up, Obi-wan thought, heart pounding uncomfortably against his ribs as adrenaline coursed through his veins making him tremble and feel short of breath.
"You've got this," Ahsoka said quietly with a sly smile as she settled back down in her chair.
As Anakin continued to stir under the covers, Obi-wan forced himself to settle back down in his own chair. It was incredibly difficult to do, considering how he felt he might die of a heart attack at any given moment.
Anakin's brilliant blue eyes slowly flickered to life, looking up at the ceiling with confusion. Obi-wan held back tears as a joyful smile forced itself onto his lips. He couldn't hold back the wave of emotion that was sweeping over him. It was too much. It was perfect. He was perfect.
Anakin's eyes adjusted to the light and swept over the room to see Ahsoka and Obi-wan sitting adjacent to him. Immediately he sat up, breathless. His stare full of hope, love, longing, so much more, as his eyes trained on his master.
"Obi-wan," he said as the man rose out of his chair, rushing over to meet Anakin as he had already taken to try to stand not realizing how weak his legs had become as he lie unconscious for the past month. "You're alright," Anakin nearly whispered as Obi-wan moved to hold him tightly, steadying him against his body. Obi-wan relished the feeling of the man leaning on him, holding him so tightly in response.
Suddenly all of the restless anxiety that had Obi-wan rapt with uncertainty had fled as he held Anakin in his arms. Everything was right now. This was how it was supposed to be. Anakin was his calm, his center. His everything.
Obi-wan drew back from their embrace, and took a breath as he was about to speak, but Anakin cut him off before he could begin.
"I'm never letting you out of my sight, Obi-wan," Anakin said, visibly upset, nearly angry. "You don't get to run off like that again. I don't care what you say about it. You're wrong-"
"But Anakin-"
"No. I love you and I'm staying with you whether you like it or not. I'm not letting you go try to find some place to die again." As Anakin continued his words grew from upset to angry, from angry to nearly wrathful.
"Anakin, I-"
But Anakin wouldn't be silenced, as tears beaded in the corners of his eyes with vehemence. "No master I won't lose you. I won't allow it. You almost died in my arms. I felt you dying, I can't do-"
Since he seemed to be unable to listen at all in his emotional state, Obi-wan cut him off with a kiss. It was one readily accepted and reciprocated as Anakin leaned into him more, wrapping his arms around him greedily.
"Ahem, I hate to break it up, but I'm right here you know," Ahsoka said, clearing her throat. Anakin pulled back for a moment, slightly embarrassed as he glanced over Obi-wan's shoulder at her then back into his master's eyes.
"Now that I have your attention," Obi-wan began, looking rather amused as he gazed into his lover's eyes. "There's something I need to tell you," he added more seriously, taking Anakin's hands between his own, holding them gently.
"I know things have been complicated between us, and difficult at times to say the least, but if there's anything I've learned through it all, it's that I love you. That I can't imagine life without you." Obi-wan took to kneeling in front of him, hands still clasped between his own as he began to tremble slightly. A look of shocked realization fell over Anakin's face sweetly. All Obi-wan wanted to do was kiss the man, but he couldn't, not yet.
"I haven't always been good to you, but you make me want to be a better man. I don't deserve your love, but I can't live without it." Obi-wan moved a shaky hand to the pocket of his cloak, retrieving a small box that he hinged open, revealing a simple golden band.
"Anakin Skywalker, will you marry me?" Obi-wan said, unspilt tears welling in his eyes as he looked up at Anakin, eyes begging, pleading.
Anakin had covered his mouth with his hands as tears fell silently down the sides of his face. He couldn't speak, so he nodded his head frantically up and down in acceptance instead as he pulled Obi-wan back up onto his feet and into his arms. Tears still fell, soaking into the fabric on Obi-wan's shoulder.
"I love you, I love you so much," Anakin mumbled in the soft cloth of Obi-wan's robes before he pulled back, looking straight into the man's eyes. "Let's do it today," Anakin said boldly. "Let's get married today," this time he spoke with a smile. Obi-wan's heart sung with gladness.
"Where?" Obi-wan asked softly, smiling as their noses brushed up against one anothers.
"Here, in the temple." Anakin answered simply, nuzzling his nose against Obi-wan's gently. "In the room of a thousand fountains. In front of that waterfall that you love. It'll be perfect."
"Who shall we ask to do the ceremony?" Obi-wan asked, taking every ounce of will to keep from whisking the man away to their quarters that very moment. The thought of Anakin being his husband the next time they lie together excited him, almost too much.
"I would be honored to," Che answered, as both men looked towards the doorway, surprised to see her standing there. "Congratulations to the both of you, by the way." She said, smiling wide. Obi-wan looked over at her and back towards Anakin with a shy expression, as he was so rapt by the circumstance that he hadn't noticed her presence.
"Yes we would love that," Anakin said, pulling out of their embrace to give Che a quick hug.
Obi-wan turned to Ahsoka, handing her the ring box. "Can I entrust you with these until the ceremony?"
"Of course," Ahsoka said, absolutely delighted.
Then Obi-wan turned back to Anakin, standing there in his white med gown, suddenly looking very alluring and innocent. And he was to be his husband. He could barely contain himself. "Meet me at the waterfall, just after sunset."
"I'll be there." Anakin said, entranced by Obi-wan's clear blue eyes as he leaned in for one final chaste kiss before leaving the small room, trailing out of the healing halls.
….
Night had finally fallen, entirely too slow for Obi-wan's liking. He waited at the bottom of the falls, Che standing in wait behind him. Ahsoka stood by with the rings, masters Yoda, Windu and Plo standing by to witness, all of them beaming as they waited for Anakin to arrive.
Obi-wan hadn't planned on wearing anything fancy, only his usual robes. Freshly cleaned and pressed of course. Ahsoka had insisted they wear flower crowns that she had braided together herself. Indeed they were quite lovely; simple white flowers laced in with greenery. Though Obi-wan wore his with a certain amount of tolerance.
When Anakin arrived, he looked like an angel, something out of a dream. The flowers that graced his golden brown locks only added to his angelic look. Though nothing about him was really different. He wore his darker colored tunics and leggings, the maroon undershirt, leather jerkin. Those eyes- for a moment Obi-wan was left breathless.
Anakin's eyes were sparkling, full of life. His lips were a perfect soft pink. How could this man, this perfect beautiful man love him? Was he good enough? Certainly he wasn't, was he? Because Anakin was perfect, too perfect. He would never be good enough. But Anakin didn't care. And that was all that mattered.
As he stood across from him, Obi-wan stifled the urge to pinch himself, to be sure he wasn't dreaming. Anakin met his gaze without falter, passionately, eyes brimming with love and hope. Hope that after all they had gone through, that they could be happy. It was something that neither of them would have ever imagined only months ago.
"We are gathered here today, to witness something truly amazing, special, and without a doubt, unique." As Che began, Obi-wan reached out for Anakin's hand. He needed physical contact to tether him to reality, to stay in the moment instead of drifting away in this living dream.
"And that is the enduring love of Anakin Skywalker, and Obi-wan Kenobi." The room fell silent. Or had it been silent already? Surely now, it felt hushed Obi-wan thought. Those words, those words that would have been the curse of their existence only months ago, now celebrated before three highly esteemed council members no less. In such a sacred place as this. How could so much change in so little time?
"Anakin, Obi-wan," Che said, addressing both of them. It took a few moments for them to pry their eyes off of each other and look at the woman who stood between and slightly behind them.
She gave a wide smile as she spoke. "To be married, is to promise each other that you will love one another, honor each other. It's an oath that you will always be there to help and encourage, to take care of one another through anything. Through everything."
"To be married is to have a safe place to go, to help both of you nurture each other, and grow to be the best versions of yourselves. To be married is to be committed to someone forever. To never give up."
"Not only shall you love, but you shall trust. You will share a deep companionship unmatched by any other. Through anything and everything. The hardships you may face, let them be things that bind you together. Hold onto one another for strength, for warmth, for hope." She smiled kindly in a pause.
"Anakin, do you take Obi-wan to be your husband?"
A glimmer of something deep, a spark, a flame burning inside of his eyes as he answered. Two words, a promise. "I do."
"Obi-wan, do you take Anakin to be your husband?"
In so many ways, yes. He wanted him heart, mind, body soul, spirit, everything. How could two words ever explain how he needed him? "I do."
"Would either of you like to exchange vows?" Che asked, nodding to Anakin first.
Taking a shaky breath, he began. "Obi-wan, you've always looked out for me, been my better half. You've saved my life more times than I could count. In more ways than you know," Anakin paused, taking a breath to still the welling tears in his beautiful blue eyes. "I love you. I'm going to be here for you. I want to be a part of your life where you can truly feel safe, and loved. Nothing is going to come between us."
Nothing is going to take you from me. I won't allow it, Anakin thought, leaving those words unspoken. It was better that way. It was the dark side of attachment, to hold onto people as if they were objects. It wasn't that he thought of Obi-wan as an object, but he simply couldn't stand the thought of losing him again. Surely it was enough that the room would have felt the possessiveness in his aura cling tightly to Obi-wan. It wasn't becoming of him, but he couldn't help it.
"Obi-wan?" Che nodded over to him. But the man was speechless, taking a moment to breathe before he could make a sound.
"I don't deserve you," he said just above a whisper. "I've never done anything to deserve you. But I love you more than anyone or anything. I promise to do my best to be the kind of man you deserve, though I'll probably fall short of that more often than I might succeed. But I promise to be here for you, I'll never leave you," Obi-wan said, voice breaking.
Not again. Never again.
As Ahsoka stepped forward with the rings, Obi-wan's pulse quickened, palms beginning to sweat. The young Togruta gave him a gleeful smile as she handed the twin gold bands over.
"Let these rings symbolize your undying love for one another, the promise you have made to each other." Che spoke as Obi-wan moved a shaky hand to place one ring on Anakin's hand. Then Anakin moved, slightly less trembling in his movements as he did the same.
"I now pronounce you married. You may now kiss your husband." Che said, as the small group erupted in applause.
Anakin leaned in first, his hands on either side of Obi-wan's face as he kissed him delicately. Obi-wan's heart sang with a happiness he didn't know was possible. For the sake of the audience, he pulled away sooner than he truly wanted to, giving a blushing smile to the room.
With a few small conversations, and many iterations of congratulations from those in attendance, Obi-wan and Anakin quickly stole away from the lingering wedding party. The two of them rushed down the temple halls towards the apartment wing, hands interlaced, both of them glancing wildly into each others eyes as they hurried, running like younglings who might have been chastised about frolicking about in the temple where they ought not.
Without a word, they sealed themselves off in Obi-wan's old quarters, the one he had sequestered himself off into after Anakin had become a Jedi knight. It had remained untouched when Obi-wan had taken leave from the temple, mostly in reverence to his service and his memory. Though Yoda had never been thoroughly convinced that Obi-wan had left for good, so in spite of the insistence of others, he had ordered it kept as it had been.
Once the two of them were behind closed doors, the world felt smaller, like it only existed around the two of them. The stood there for a few seconds, catching their breath from their short sprint over, giggling and gazing into eachothers eyes happily.
Suddenly Obi-wan felt shy, embarrassed. He wasn't entirely sure as to why, after all Anakin was now his husband. He knew him better than anyone else in the entire galaxy. Perhaps it was part of his old self lingering, telling him this was all wrong, that he had taken advantage. That Anakin deserved better.
Anakin smiled at him, pulling him by the hand to the sleeper in the next room over, a soft look of affection in his eyes. Obi-wan let himself be guided over, let himself be pulled down, as Anakin slowly took to removing his garments one by one, planting kisses on his neck and shoulders as his skin was revealed at a torturously slow pace.
As he took to pulling down his leggings, Anakin gently kissed his hip bone, then across to the other side as his hands pulled him free of his clothes entirely. Obi-wan felt paralyzed by the soft gentle touches and kisses, his heart singing a song that felt like both delightful and painful all at the same time.
Anakin stood to quickly shed all of his layers before he lie down next to Obi-wan, nestling in next to him closely, placing his flesh hand over the man's heart to feel the strong steady pulse. He smiled at him, eyes boring into his soul, searching, begging for connection. For the bond they once shared to be brought to life once again. His kind eyes suddenly felt like a knife through his heart.
Obi-wan sat up against the headboard, a feeling of unworthiness taking over his chest, heavy and sick. He pulled his knees up to his chest, burying his head in his arms to hide the tears that slid down his cheeks. Anakin deserved so much better, it felt selfish to trap the man in as he had done. Now they were married, and Obi-wan felt like a monster.
Anakin sat up beside him, placing a warm hand on his back, rubbing in soothing circles as he kissed his master's forehead sweetly. It made Obi-wan feel even worse as his tears became quiet sobs.
"Obi-wan," Anakin said gently, consolingly. "What's wrong?"
"I don't deserve you Anakin," Obi-wan bit out shakily, "Even here, now, I feel…" I feel like a monster for wanting you so badly.
"Open up to me," Anakin commanded softly. "Let me in." He now nestled into his masters hair that fell over his face. "Let me show you how I feel. You're the only person in this galaxy I want."
If I let you in, you'll see me for what I am. You'll never love me again. Obi-wan cried harder, shoulders shaking with sadness.
Anakin wouldn't have it, as he gently maneuvered Obi-wan to lower his knees so that he could straddle his hips, pressing their faces up against one another. Obi-wan still cried, warm wet tears falling down, now being wiped away by Anakin's hands as he softly kissed his cheeks, the corners of his eyes, all places touched by his tears. Then delicately, he planted small kisses over his lips, his chin and neck. Slowly, Obi-wan's tears began to lessen. Though he felt just as awful. How could he allow himself to be happy? He had thought maybe they could be happy together. He didn't want to leave Anakin again, but he didn't deserve to be happy, or so he felt.
"Please, let me in," Anakin said in a hushed whisper, lips brushing against his master's ear, his flesh hand still pressed up against the man's chest, pushing a warm sense of love and acceptance into his aura.
"I can't," Obi-wan gasped, pulling arms around his husband shakily as his heart ached and writhed, tearing itself apart with regret and grief. For as much as Anakin had forgiven him without a second thought, he couldn't forgive himself for all that he had done. It felt like a stain on their love, one that would never wash clean.
Anakin wrapped his arms around him in response. "Trust me," he said earnestly, "I know it's hard. But let me prove to you that it's going to be alright. Just trust me."
Obi-wan shivered, pressing his head up against Anakin's shoulder. "I'm scared," he confessed, "You won't look at me the same if I let you in."
"Oh Obi-wan," Anakin said gently, pulling back from their embrace to look his husband in the eye, "you know that's not true. Nothing is going to change how much I love you. Or how beautiful you are to me."
Obi-wan shivered under his husband's gaze, letting out a sound of surprise as Anakin pressed his lips up against his, tongue gently finding a way past his lips, tangling wonderfully with his own. Obi-wan could feel Anakin pushing through their bond, prying at the edges of where he had walled him off. He could feel a sense of how it hurt him, that he wasn't opening up. But Anakin wouldn't show it, not even a fraction of how his own heart hurt in response.
Because his soul was beautiful, selfless. A brilliant white glow against any darkness that might contest against him. He was strong, kind, more than Obi-wan could have ever hoped for. Somehow it made the sting of his own shortcomings even harsher.
But he would try. He had to try, to open up. To let him in. Because Anakin made him want to be better. In the end, there was nothing he wouldn't give the man. He would give or do anything for him.
Obi-wan slowly broke down the wall, one brick at a time. He could feel Anakin gripping him harder, kissing him more frantically, the heat of his skin growing warmer on his own as their bond came alive. He could feel it, like a salve to Anakin's soul. It was everything he had been wanting, been yearning for, for so long. More than anything else, he needed to feel the light of their souls intertwining, comuning as one.
Obi-wan could feel Anakin's heart flutter, his mind come alive as his essence wrapped itself around his heart and soul. Small moans of excitement came deep from within him as he pulled a hand through Obi-wan's hair, pressing their lips against each other harder, wanting to feel as close as he could. Obi-wan could feel the desire, the deep burning need his husband felt for him, both in his body and soul.
I want you need you now, now, please master, Anakin begged through their bond. He smiled in their kiss as he felt a pulse of electricity spread through Obi-wan, who held him tighter now.
I don't know how to control myself, you stir up things in me I don't understand. I'm afraid, Obi-wan confessed, feeling himself dangerously at the edge of his self restraint.
A shiver of exhilaration prickled down Anakin's spine at Obi-wan's confession. The animal want, need, the desire to possess him, to have him, to hold him made Anakin's stomach churn with anxious desire. It made every inch of his skin feel sensitive and alive. Obi-wan was such a gentle precious soul. The fact that he could make a man like that so become unhinged and wild sparked a flame of passion in his chest.
Obi-wan was like this for him. Anakin was much more acquainted with such base desires and emotions, he had been his whole life. Only now had he come to better manage such things. Obi-wan had been a man of practiced discipline as long as he had known him. But for him, and him alone, he harbored the basest of instincts and desires.
Please, please, please take me, do what you want with me, I need you so badly it hurts master, it hurts. Inside, I need to feel you inside please Obi-wan please…
"Oh Anakin," Obi-wan whispered breathlessly as he leaned forward, putting the man beneath him, a pulse of excitement trilling down his limbs.
Anakin reached out, pulling a small bottle of lubricant over, thoroughly and quickly getting himself wet enough to take his husband's cock. Then he pulled his knees up and to the side, presenting himself for Obi-wan who drew back, placing himself gently at Anakin's entrance as he pressed into him slowly.
Anakin gazed up innocently and unfaltering into Obi-wan's eyes, biting his lip as he quelled a smile. He could sense how irresistible he was becoming to the man, how wild he was becoming. Though when he gasped, throwing his head back with a soft moan of pleasure, it was equally a show for his husband, as well an expression of how he was making him feel.
Obi-wan buried himself gradually, gripping one hand on Anakin's leg, the other smoothing over his stomach and chest, trailing up to gently grip at his collarbone. There was a mixture of feelings clashing inside of his mind and body. He didn't feel good enough, but he loved him, he loved him so much. All of it was beautiful. Their hearts, minds, bodies, all passionately twisted up together. His heart ached at how he could feel Anakin so full of love and want for him. It was more than he had ever hoped for.
He leaned down to meet Anakin's lips in another kiss, small soft moans escaping him as he thrust gently, reaching down to tease Anakin's throbbing length. You're perfect, wonderful, good, beautiful. Oh force, Anakin, I love you so much.
I'm yours, Obi-wan. All of me, Anakin whispered across their bond, wrapping his legs around his husbands hips, meeting with thrusts of his own.
Take me, I want to feel you cum inside me, feel you warm, wet, hot, good, so good, Anakin fed the words into his master's mind, the words he might not have ever had the nerve to say, but all things that he felt, that Obi-wan could feel were true, that he wanted him. He could feel the pleasure welling inside of him, pulsing, throbbing, begging, on the edge, so close to orgasm. Pushing Obi-wan closer as well, his tantric words and thoughts making him feral, low grunts sounding in Anakin's ear as his husband pinned his wrists overhead, his body pressing in hard as he worked him feverishly, sweat slicking his body as he pounded him with his cock.
Obi-wan's mind was blank with pleasure, lost in the sheer sensation of their bodies nearing climax mixed with the whispers Anakin sent through their bond, sweet words of affirmation along with erotic suggestions and praise. It was more than Obi-wan could handle.
Anakin came first, seed spilling hard over both of their chests, orgasm racking his body as he trembled under the hold of his master, crying out with pleasure as he crested. In the same heartbeat Obi-wan gasped, tensing as he tightened his grip on the man below him, spilling hot seed inside of him with a low moan.
Anakin nestled into the crook of his master's neck, breathing heavy, a wide smile on his face. Obi-wan moved to roll off of him, but Anakin trapped him with his legs. "No, not yet," he breathed out as Obi-wan looked down at him inquisitively. "It feels so good," Anakin added in a seductive voice, eyes gazing up into his husband's with a desperate yet commanding stare.
Even more gratifying was the way he could feel the man grow harder inside of him again at his words. Obi-wan drew back, kneeling between his thighs as he pulled out almost entirely, before sliding back in slowly, prodding that spot that made Anakin gasp and moan. He looked over the man's body rapaciously, thumbing gently over his nipples. He smiled, saying one word, a declaration, a promise. "Husband."
Anakin's eyes bore into his, shifting his weight over to push Obi-wan back up against the headboard while he straddled his hips, the man's cock still buried inside of him. "Yes my love?" Anakin asked, lips brushing against Obi-wan's as he worked the man's shaft, earning a string of soft moans from him.
Somehow the feeling of being inside of him felt even more wonderful, as Anakin's tight muscle was now slicked with his cum. His heart sang with a sense of ownership. Anakin was his. It was an animal instinct to lay claim, to have, the feeling of his cum inside of him was gratifying in those ways. There was a feeling of jealousy from the animal part of his mind, no one else could have him.
Anakin gave him a sultry smile, one laced with pleasure as he stroked himself, simultaneously fucking himself on Obi-wan's fully engorged cock. He could feel the darker feelings inside of the man who he mercilessly prodded to orgasm. It was an aphrodisiac to him, enhancing his own pleasure. He loved the feeling of being wanted, so completely needed. All of it intensified by the duality of their love, how selfless Obi-wan was. But Anakin held that power over him, to turn the man into a pleasure fiend in seconds.
Obi-wan took Anakin's face in his hands, bringing their foreheads together. "I love you, I love you," Obi-wan said breathlessly, the high of his possessiveness melting into a heartwarming thankfulness. Anakin wanted him, loved him. He still couldn't believe it.
"I love you too," Anakin whispered, gently meeting his lips in a soft, passionate kiss. Obi-wan wrapped his hands around him, placing one at his low back and another between his shoulders, feeling through their bond how the touch made him feel whole, loved, cherished. And he was, completely.
Anakin kept on riding his master at a gentle pace as Obi-wan touched a hand down on his cock, moving his hand away so that he might pleasure him instead. Anakin let him, bracing his hands on Obi-wan's lower legs instead, looking at his husband who was quickly losing himself to another orgasm, his body trembling as his pleasure began to quickly grow, releasing as he threw his head back, a soft strangled moan leaving his throat.
The feeling of Obi-wan's throbbing cock inside of him, the hot wet feeling of fresh cum being spilled pushed him over the edge as he cried out prettily, watching his master with hooded eyes as pleasure swept over him. He wanted the man to drink in just how wonderful he made him feel, every ounce of the delicious pleasure that pulsed inside of him.
"I wish it could always be like this," Anakin sighed, putting his head down on Obi-wan's chest in his glowing exhaustion.
"It could be," Obi-wan answered back, wiping his hand off on a nearby towel and holding Anakin around his shoulders. "We can go anywhere, do anything."
"Where do you want to go?" Anakin asked, yawning, feeling rather sleepy.
"Someplace warm, but not too warm. Lots of green." Obi-wan said distantly as he tried to visualize where they might go.
"You could be a teacher. You would be a wonderful teacher. I could have a shop, fix things for people. We could live a simple life. Maybe even raise children." Anakin said wistfully, drifting off to sleep. "We can grow old together. Be happy. As happy as we are right now."
"Let's sleep now, dear one. We can talk about it all tomorrow," Obi-wan said, feeling glad Anakin was less aware, so that he didn't sense the feeling of unease that churned in his heart. He couldn't forget what Qui-gon had said. That it wasn't all over. That there would be more darkness to face against. The thought of raising children with his beloved sounded wonderful. But their path was hardly that of one safe enough to raise younglings.
"Goodnight, husband," Anakin said with a smile.
"Goodnight my love."