Chapter 37: Chronicles of a Roman Emperor

Xander was sitting at a table before a list of what he was going to speak about that night when the knock sounded on the door. It was probably Buffy coming to attempt to talk her out of making a speech tonight. Well, she could just forget it. He was his own man. If he didn't make the speech tonight, he'd expect himself, his friends, and Julia and her family to be killed in a matter of moments.

"Buffy, I'm guessing?" Xander asked Julia, who stood at his side.

Julia nodded in agreement.

On the way he glanced at the list and did his best to gather all he could from what he would say. Any second wasted on not preparing for his speech would mean a second taken away from his delivery and his content, which would mean almost certain death. One portraying himself as emperor faced two consequences: either become Emperor or be killed. It was as simple as that, Xander knew. He scratched his chin and suddenly diverted his attention towards Buffy and how he would respond to her anger. Xander opened the door and took in Buffy wearing a wet, white toga and looking all kinds of gorgeous.

Surprise mixed with immense pleasure at the sight of her. Forget the anger she was feeling. Forget the way she was looking at him angrily or that the way she smelled was very perfumish. He needed to pay attention to why she was at this door. "I know you are making a speech with that whore," she blurted out.

"Nice to see you too," Xander said with a smile.

Buffy crossed her arms over her chest. "How about, you tell me what you did with Julia. You had sex with her, didn't you?"

Julia walked in front of Buffy, beside Xander. "He's got more important matters to deal with, Buffy"- anger flashed over Buffy's face- "with the Emperor situation going on."

"You had sex with him, didn't you?" Buffy turned to Julia and asked her instead.

"What makes you say that, Buffy?" Julia asked innocently, but with a twitch of sarcasm in her voice.

Buffy nodded toward the table Xander was sitting at. "It's raining outside. Can I come in?"

Xander's gaze at Buffy softened. "You can come in, of course, Buffy. But I'm preparing a speech right now. We can talk about this stuff later on."

Outrage spiked through Buffy. "This stuff? That's what you call infidelity, huh?"

"I guess she doesn't seem like she is going to listen to you, Xander. I say we go back to business and leave her out in the rain."

Buffy could hear restrained anger in Julia's voice. "Damn you two!" Buffy said. "Xander, you meet a pretty woman and in a few days, you act as if you've known her longer than me!" Buffy pushed Xander and Julia aside and came into the well lighted room. Both Xander and Julia could sense her distress and it was rubbing off on them too.

Xander caught a glint of something, calmness maybe, in her eyes. "Buffy, I know you understand. I can see it in your eyes. You know why I'm with Julia. It's not because I love her or because I want to be with her. I want to be with you, Buffy."

"I'm sorry. But what are these papers?" Buffy shuffled all of the papers off of the table with one swing of her hand. Those of which happened to be documents carefully placed there to help Xander's speech.

"Ah, Buffy. What are you doing? Those papers are important... for my speech." He rubbed his chin, looking around the room. His gaze shifted to the floor where the papers had fallen. "How long do you plan on being here, Buffy?"

Buffy turned to look at Xander to see where he was looking at. The papers were in a disarray and not organized. "What, you need these don't you?"

Xander swallowed. He seemed to wait for more explanation to what he had asked.

"Look, Xander, I know you may get killed during the speech or just after it. So what good is it if you tell me what happened after the speech? I love you Xander. I just don't know what to say. Do you want to drive me crazy by not telling me?"

That got a quick smile out of him. "I love you too, Buffy. But please don't make me down right now... I have to be strong and make a speech..."

"You're going to be down?" Buffy looked down at Xander's right hand, where he held a list of what he was going to say in his speech.

"I, uh, am already down, actually."

"It's guilt that bothers you."

"A lot of things bother me right now, Buffy. But guilt is one of them, yes," Xander added at her a saddened expression. He walked over to the table and ran his fingers along the edges of the table. "So... are you willing to forgive me?"

Buffy narrowed her eyes. "No, and you wouldn't care anyway. You're marrying to Julia anyway. We're done, Xander."

Xander let out a long breath. "People make mistakes, Buffy."

"That's probably the one thing that you've said that makes me feel better since I've got here." Buffy couldn't help the thrill of finding out finally that Xander had been unfaithful to her.

Xander sighed and leaned against the wall behind him. "Dammit, Buffy. I don't know what else to do or say. I did have sex with Julia." Buffy could hear the pain in his voice; pain, loneliness, and desperation. "I need... I'd like you to be here with me Buffy."

Buffy couldn't breathe for a moment. With those words, he had cut open her heart. "I'm going down to the city for a walk," she said. "Tonight. Let everyone else here take care of you but I will be gone. And-" her own voice hitched. "I don't know what else to do or say either."

Something in her voice made Xander look at her pleadingly. "Are you going to forgive me, Buffy?"

"Why should I forgive you? Our bond was stronger than anyone's, Xander. I can't believe you did that."

"I know it was. It still is. But this was different, Buffy."

"Yes, it was different. It was a different girl. I know about your past, Xander. You did the same thing to Cordelia with Willow. How did Cordelia forgive you, Xander?"

"I'll go with you."

"No." She knelt down and picked up the papers she had pushed to the floor. Once she had done so, she placed them neatly on the table from where she swiped them off. "Not a good idea Xander."

Xander pushed his back away from the wall and walked over to her, attempting to use all of his six-foot height to impose his will upon her. "Why not?"

She looked down, doing her best to avoid his brown eyes, but his perfectly shaped face wasn't a good place to find distraction, or his throat. She looked away from him to watch Julia staring at them from the door opening. "Because I don't want you telling me I overreacted, or... making me feel worse than what I feel right now. I don't want your begging and pleading self around. I need to be by myself for a while."

He touched her chin, pulling her gaze back to his. "I won't let you leave like this."

His touch filled her with warmth and pulled her toward him. She moved back, shaking her head. "And... and we shouldn't be so tied together anyway. It just makes things worse. My heart can't take it again."

"If you can take an attempted rape by Spike and lay in a bed with him afterwards... someone you love... how can you not take this?"

Buffy narrowed her eyes. "I didn't love him, Xander. You're too sensible, too grounded."

"I'm too human."

"I love you Xander because you're not the love-them-leave-them type of guy like Spike... Scott or Parker... Don't ask me how I know that, but I do. I'm not supposed to want a man this bad. I'm supposed to be strong as a slayer. I am a woman, hear me roar kind of thing."

But she did want him. Xander scanned her while she attempted to look strong and independent.

"You're telling me you shouldn't be so head over heels to me since you're the slayer?" he asked. "Let me tell you this, Buffy. You're human. You have superhuman abilities, but you are human. I am human. Humans aren't perfect. I made a mistake and I am sorry, Buffy. Everyone makes..."

"Don't say mistakes again," Buffy said, pointing at him. "This was a dumb mistake, Xander. After you and I fought together and nearly died. You have sex with someone you barely know. How can you do this?!" She instinctively ran her fingers through her hair. "Maybe if I meet someone sensitive and romantic, I can tolerate this but you are nothing but a brute now, Xander. Look at yourself, you have a better body than Spike and Angel combined..."

"How can you call me that? I'm not just a brute. I am sensitive."

"Sensitive, huh? Sensitive towards my feelings by having sex with that whore!" Buffy turned to glare at Julia, who rightly was not saying anything and watching intently at what was going on. "A simple sorry is not enough for me, Xander. I need more."

"Are you going to cheat on me or something? An eye for an eye thing. Come on Buffy. We're adults here."

She wrapped her arms around herself, feeling the sting all over again. "You hurt me, Xander. So fine, say sorry. Go away and let me deal with this on my own."

He scanned her again, and she attempted to put on her toughest slayer face. He put his hands on his hips and leaned down towards her. "Okay, tell me this. You go down to the city and then what? Do you have a place to stay? Any money on you? If I am killed by the mob our friends don't stand much of a chance either do they? Are you willing to take that chance Buffy?"

"You're overreacting again, Xander."

"No... I'm just making sense."

"So fine, I'll bring our friends."

He shook his head. "Go back to our chambers and relax. I will get the speech done soon. Don't be punishing me now, Buffy. We're losing time, and you can punish me anytime, anywhere, after the speech, Buffy."

"You're over-"

"No I'm not. You were. Let's just do-" there was an interesting sparkle in his eyes- "something practical here, Buffy, come on."

Buffy stared down. She weighed her options. Being alone in the city definitely was not a great idea. He was not as sensitive as he said by no means, but every time she caught that glint of compassion, her heart opened a little more. But he did have a point, which meant she would look foolish arguing with him when she knew he was right.

"Okay, but get that speech done and do it carefully, please. I hope everything goes as planned," Buffy said.

"Usually doesn't, but thanks for the good luck, or possibly jinx."

"Just understand Xander that I am going to be the boss in this relationship now. I know you've been used to being in charge while in Rome because you saved my life a hundred or so times, but you've milked that one dry. Now you owe me. You're going to have to win back my trust and your power over me."

"Fine. You're in charge. Can you please go to the chambers?"

"Okay, as long as we have that clear," Buffy said, narrowing her eyes at Xander. "And no more jokes from now on. You are going to be an Emperor. You have to be mature."

"I won't."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, seriously. Go."

"And no more touching and kissing. Nothing, not even contact."

"What?! Are you crazy?!"

Buffy laughed, realizing her statement had gotten the exact reaction she had wanted. "I'm just kidding, but don't take it for granted anymore," she said, turning and going towards the open doorway. "Goodbye Xander."

Xander's smile widened as he lost himself in good feelings about the slayer. "Goodbye Buffy. Be sure to attend the speech."

Buffy stared at him deeply. "I will," she replied politely.

Julia took Buffy's arm and prepared to lead her out of the room.

Buffy glared at Julia. "Get your hands off me," Buffy declared sharply. "And get your hands off my man."

Xander smiled and shook his head. He had dodged a bullet, at least for now.

Julia didn't even attempt to stifle a groan as she let go of the slayer's arm, slowly turning around as Buffy left the room. Absently rubbing her backside, Julia found herself fervently wishing that she had interrupted Buffy and Xander's conversation when they were angry at each other.

"You know," she muttered, continuing the conversation she'd had with him before Buffy entered. "It's fairly clear you need to mention that you are a Roman. If they know you are not a Roman, you will be killed on the spot."

"I agree."

Julia growned inwardly. She knew Xander was not a Roman and for that reason had liked him instantly. She had been having sexual inclinations about Xander for over a week and it would not leave her alone, despite her obvious efforts to shift them to her now deceased husband. There was nothing overtly wrong with Xander; his manners were nothing if not correct, and he was obviously intelligent. Buffy's nice regard for him even after mentioning he had sexual relations with her was a reaction to his overall good character. The tone of his voice, the way he looked at Buffy, the tilt of his head when he surveyed the room Buffy was in- all of which had somehow managed to make Buffy feel comfortable and happy in his presence. He was a strange man, outwardly courteous to her but at the same time somewhat disdainful of the fact he was put in this position by her and the events surrounding her husband's death. Another final oddity was that Xander seemed to put Roman politics in extremely low regard.

So Julia was not overjoyed to find him standing where he was, in a daze, obviously considering Buffy. "If you do not come off as sharp," Julia began politely, doing her best to brush aside the obvious fact he was not listening. "The Romans will consider you a half wit and will kill you."

"Thanks for not intervening, Julia. I mean that."

Julia was exceedingly annoyed to note that he had spoken those words to her butt. She was acuetly uncomfortable and longed to tug her dress up, but she would not give Xander the satisifaction of realizing it had unnerved her. "Thank you for that, Xander," she said through gritted teeth. "But I assure you, next time you have an argument during business affairs, I will interrupt with pleasure. Now if you'll excuse me, however, I should really get back to my children. My children will be missing me." Julia started to leave, but he quickly grabbed her lower arm. His grip was not painful, nor was it cruel, but Xander held her firmly, making it abundantly clear that he did not intend for her to leave anytime soon.

"Julia," he said smoothly, his silky voice belying his iron grip on her arm. "Let's finish this speech so I can go out there and get it done."

Julia said nothing.

Xander's grip tightened slightly. "No comeback, Julia? You're willing to let you and your family be at the mercy of the Roman mob?"

"Your fate is not much better," she replied icily.

"Julia, we need to finish this speech. So much is at stake here."

Julia frowned, unsure of what to make of that comment.

"I have a feeling, Julia, that you did not enjoy me and Buffy's reconcilation."

Xander let go of her arm abruptly, and Julia snatched it back. "If you think that I will marry you with this going on-"

Xander let out a sharp laugh at the hot determination of her voice. "I love Buffy, Julia. You know that right?"

"I am a proper woman. I will marry a man that loves me and I will not shame myself by marrying one that does not."

Julia's free hand shot up to slap his face, but Xander caught her arm before it connected.

"Calm down, Julia. I know you are disappointed. We are marrying for the safety of your family. You understand that, right?"

Julia laughed in his face. "You know how many men I can marry if I wanted to? Damn it, Xander, I love you. You're my soul mate. I searched throughout this Roman world and I have found you."

Xander tightened his hold on her wrists until Julia could not help but wince from the pain. Her distress made him feel guilty, and his pale eyes glittered dangerously in the dim light of the room. Julia lifted her chin stubbornly, and he abruptly let her go, causing her to stumble back a few steps.

"You shouldn't waste your time with this fantasy, Julia. As you said you can get any man... Why me? What makes me so different?"

Julia glanced outside the open doorway, and Xander found he was beginning to put Julia in an uncomfortable position. "You don't want to hear this," she said. "We need to start on that speech as you said."

Xander did, and he did not. "As your future spouse, I feel like I should know this," he said. "Maybe it can explain a lot to me so I don't have to wonder about it."

"You're a strong man," Julia said, "it is something that captures my heart. It is not just your strength but your will. I need someone like you with me and my children."

Xander wasn't sure he agreed. "You're basing this on me killing the Praetorian guard leaders?"

"No," Julia said with an air of fatigue that surprised Xander. "Not just that, Xander... I heard about how you lost your best friend, Cimberius... How you were poisoned at his funeral... How you killed a Praetorian guardsman for revenge and how you killed his mistress in self-defense... How you avenged Pertinax's death by killing those Praetorian guardsmen... It's leader... Pulcher... You've done so much..."

"But many people has experiences like this in Rome, Julia..." Xander said gently. "I assume Severus told you all about me. Listen, I know Rome... It is a brutal place. I survived, yes, but I should not get any pity for it. I know for sure, others have had experiences similiar to mine, if not worse. Would you love them too?"

"No I wouldn't," Julia said, looking away. "It's just you managed to not let it transform you. You're a sweet guy."

Her voice was full of sadness and love, and Xander let it go. "By the way," he said, "I can use what you said about me in my speech. I gather that's okay for my speech?"

"Some women need men that can go through what you did and can have a smile on them afterwards."

Xander sat down where he was sitting earlier at the table. "Would you like something to drink, Julia?"

"Yes, thank you, I would."

Julia watched as Xander made a gesture to someone standing in a corner. He was a servant who managed to slip in after Buffy had left. He most likely was being respectful to Xander and Buffy's conversation as Julia was, but was not present in the room.

"Well, I thank you for clarifying why you love me, Julia," he said. Here he hesitated, for to tell her how he felt about her was to assume too great an intimacy. "If I have known all of your experiences," he said instead. "I am sure I would love you the same way."

"Maybe not."

"I'm sure I would."

"How'd you meet Buffy?"

"Whoa there," Xander said. Some of the papers in front of him were whisked away, and a cup of water was set before him. He glanced at Julia. "You won't have any?" he asked.

"I... I drink too much water anyway."

"Come on, take a seat, Julia," Xander said, gesturing her to take a seat beside him. She took a seat beside him. Then he considered how to respond to how he had met Buffy. He figured he'd begin where he first met her in Rome, after being transferred here through a portal in a bag that Giles had experimented with. "I saved her from being hanged."

Julia said nothing, a silence Xander took to be shock and admiration.

"I imagine this might add to my speech with my amazing biography," he said.

"It should. Wow..." Julia sighed and then smiled. There was simply no adequate response. "You're really something," she said.

"That's what started it all. I could've just took it easy and had a quiet time in Rome. But no... You know I got imprisoned after that and was set to be executed..." Xander trailed off, realizing he was giving too much away.

"Imprisoned?"

"Yes. Buffy was set to be executed and I was going to be spared. But I decided to be executed with her."

"Who set these executions?" Julia asked, a bit startled that something like this could have happened to Xander.

"Pertinax," Xander said, knowing that he would not be punished for what he was saying since Severus was dead and he was going to be Emperor. "I remember what he told me that helped me become what I am now... He said he respected the ringleader 'or the man who has the balls to do something that could easily cost him his life. It's those who follow that leader I dislike. You are a person of your own.' Something like that he told me. I mean I didn't really use it for motivation but man... it made sense."

"Pertinax told you that? Are you joking?" Julia asked in bewilderment. "If he told you that, why would he want to execute you?"

"I convinced him too," Xander said. "Even then, I was in love with Buffy."

"Hmm... It would be best we left this out of your speech... The part where Pertinax sent you to be executed," Julia said, and Xander nodded. "How did you and Buffy escape?"

"He was assassinated the day Buffy and I were supposed to be executed," Xander said, pondering to collect what he knew about Pertinax's assassination. "Ironically, Pulcher is who saved me... because he was the one who led his men to kill Pertinax."

"Wow, what a coincidence... and you killed him..."

"He deserved to die," Xander said, and he had to cut himself short before he mentioned why he hated Pulcher so much. The fact he had killed two women, a mother and daughter in cold blood. Two women he had loved as a family despite being with them for a brief period. Two women, ever since killing Pulcher, he had not had nightmares about since.

Julia thought about the way Xander could have survived such a story and it made butterflies fill in her stomach.

She wanted for him to get out of his clothes. "Xander, knowing it may be your last speech," Julia said. "I say we do something before..."

"Yeah... We need to add parts and bits of what I told you... About Pulcher and how he killed innocent women and children..." Xander said. "Anything else I should add?"

"Don't waste your time," Julia said. "We can make the speech anytime before sunrise. You know that right?"

Julia bent toward Xander and kissed him. It was an unexpectedly soft kiss, and Julia put her palm on his chest.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her against him. She laid her hand softly on his shoulder from his chest.

She pulled back, looking deep into his eyes. He looked back, still a little shocked.

Julia looked off and blushed. This gave him the urge to kiss her. He wanted to be with a woman. Her kiss, her soft lips against his, he wanted to feel it again.

He locked his lips with hers again, and felt his answer. His arms were still around her waist, while she slipped her arms slowly around his neck.

They kissed for minutes, and how cold she was before, how hot she had became after they had kissed.

He dumped his armor on the floor, before leading Julia over to a bed, and she and him crawled under the sheets and embraced again. Admiring, she stroked his muscles, which came out because of his wet, tight undershirt.

For a moment, both just looked back at each other. Her petite hands were on his chest. Then, slowly, her hands trailed down, grabbing the end of his shirt. She moved it back up, showing his belly, which was marked by a six pack. His hand stopped hers, and he looked at her, questioning. Her gaze was shy, but certain. She had waited for him since she had sex with him. All these moments, she had waited for this moment again. She didn't want to wait anymore.

He moved his hands out of the way and feld them behind his head, so she could remove his shirt.

Again he kissed her, their hands trailing over each other's body. They broke the kiss when Julia loosened his underwear. He nibbled gently on her earlobe while she threw off his underwear and threw it on the floor.

He pushed himself up, looking at the small woman beneath him. Her lips were swollen and red with treatment, her eyes squinting. He could see the violet shimmering through her eyelids. Slowly, he removed her clothing, which protected her from the cold.

As he did, he saw the servant watching with a smile next to the open doorway. "Please leave and get the door on your way out."

The servant quickly snapped out of his trance and looked at Xander with a forced smile. "Yes Caesar." Within a second, he was outside and the door was slammed with a decisive thud.

Xander shifted his gaze to Julia's body. Her body was amazing for a woman reaching fifty. It was curved exactly how it was supposed to be. Her breasts were perfectly round, moving up and down with her coarse breathing, her nipples were tight. His hands trembled as he found himself rather intimidated by her wonderful body. Though his body was great, he felt as if he was a kid with a woman. Well, in a way, he was.

His eyes found hers again. She had seen him hesitate.

'What about Buffy?' Xander wondered to himself as she watched him.

She bit her lip as she watched him. He noticed. A quick smile compensated for the awkwardness.

"I'm sorry for that," Xander said to her and she nodded, knowing it was okay with him.

He lowered his head, kissing her again, this time with more meaning than any of their kisses before. She could feel it. It meant so much passion, and it could even have meant love as well. His hands softly caressed her breasts, earning a small whimper of delight.

He slowly tugged off her undergarments, leaving her totally naked like him. A nervous shiver crept down his spine, but he couldn't turn back. He wanted it, she wanted it- he would do it again. They would do it again.

As slowly as possible, he pushed his member inside of her vagina. She whimpered, and he held still, looking at her face, a nervous look on his. He could clearly see the tears appear in the corners of her blue-coloured eyes. Softly he wiped them away, and when she nodded, he continued. He pushed himself in, and pulled out.

He went faster when she wrapped her slender legs around him and gave a soft moan. He grunted as his breathing went faster.

Her hands buried themselves in his hair, and she moaned again. They were both panting.

Willow, Dawn, Cato, and Brittany managed to keep the boys Caracalla, 5, and Geta, 4, entertained throughout a brief meal. Willow spent so much of her time reminding the boys how special their mom was. They all had hoped that sooner rather than later these frequent reminders would act to bring them out of their reverie that they were in upon hearing that the children's daddy was gone.

At the end of their meal, Willow rose from the table they were sitting at with a quick smile. "I feel like I'll go back to my chambers now," she said. "Cato can you please entertain those boys for me?"

"Sure, Willow," Cato said. "Are you coming back tonight?"

"Just come when you hear about Xander's speech starting," Willow said, sounding resigned. "We all should attend that speech."

"I can guarantee you I'll be there," Cato assured her. "Xander becoming emperor... My god!"

Brittany shook her head in disbelief at the notion and started chit chatting with one of the boys.

"Are you going to sleep Willow?" Dawn asked, running an eye over Willow's simple navy-blue linen blouse and white shirt. The same she had been wearing when they were transported to Rome.

"Yes, I suppose so," Willow said. "Since you know I didn't get much earlier tonight."

"Oh, I know what you mean," Dawn said. "Is it okay if I come down to talk with you for a moment before you go to sleep?" Dawn smoothed down the dress she was wearing.

Willow laughed. "Well, if you want to talk about 'you know what' then no, but if something else, we can..."

Dawn nodded.

Willow went to the back of the room, leaving them to keep the boys happy and divert their attention enough so they don't wonder about what had happened to their father. Cato would be responsible for entertaining the two boys, ensuring that he would be lacking any sleep that he would otherwise be getting at this time.

Unsteady on her feet, Willow walked over to where her robe was and hurriedly removed what she was wearing and donned it. Knowing Dawn had followed her back, she asked shakily, "You want to talk about what happened with what Buffy and Xander did with me, right?"

"What you guys did?" Dawn sat at the end of the bed and acted as if she didn't know. She had cried rivers of tears once Willow had told her what she had done by sleeping with Buffy and Xander. It was disgusting to her that her sister would involve herself in such an act. "Let's not talk about it anymore."

"Let's not. I can't believe Xander and Buffy got me to do that," she whispered, then realized she'd been the one who had instigated the idea of a threesome. "Actually take that back... I did this to myself."

Dawn plowed all ten fingers through her hair. "I'm apparently missing something here. Maybe you can clue me in. Did you participate in it to strengthen your friendship with them? With Buffy? Xander?"

"Sort of." Remembering that there was a handkerchief she used as an eye protector was around on the floor somewhere, Willow walked around the bed and searched on the floor until she found the handkerchief.

Her hands shook so nervously, she had trouble grasping the handkerchief. She inhaled deeply, and coughed deeply.

She went back to where she had been standing before and wrapped the handkerchief around her arm so it wouldn't fall back on the floor.

"Willow, dear, tell me what's wrong?"

"You have every right to be angry," she said, walking back into the living room and retrieving a wooden doll that one of the kids had played with. She held it to her abdomen like a shield.

"I'm not mad," Dawn said gently. "Just confused."

"It's Xander."

"Xander." Dawn repeated as if she weren't quite sure she remembered the name. "What about Xander? You love him?"

"Yes." She nodded once, profoundly. "He's going to be Emperor, Dawn. My god, he is some guy." Her gaze skirted back to the bed. "He's been kind and good-"

"He's in love with Buffy." Her words were heavy with insinuation. "Give Buffy a chance to be with him. She's in love with him too. You can't get between those two."

"It's not that kind of love," she said, and she realized she was doing a poor job of explaining herself. She swept her hair away from her face. "I mean I just want to be around him... everywhere he goes. Sure, there's some sexual feelings but not as much as you'd expect," she said bluntly.

Dawn's eyes rounded with offense. "Hey, I didn't come here to talk to you about this stuff, Willow-"

"I know, I know," she interrupted. "I just want to get this off my chest. And this stupid toy..." She threw the doll on the floor. "I don't know how to explain it. He's kind and handsome and-"

"You're talking about Xander right?"

"Right. I can't hurt Buffy because I love him. But if she has any doubts, I will be waiting for the moment that happens."

Dawn didn't respond.

"You have every right to be angry at me. I know your sister is happy with Xander but I don't know..."

Again Dawn didn't say anything. She stood and walked over to Willow.

"It's okay, Willow. I feel the same way, actually," Dawn admitted, lowering her head in shame.

"You do?"

"Except I want Xander more in a sexual way."

"Oh," Willow said, nodding.

Then Dawn headed back outside of the chambers. "We'll talk about this after the speech..."

"But... what did you want to talk about, Dawn?" Willow asked quickly before Dawn left the chambers.

"After the speech," Dawn muttered as she scratched her cheek. "Get some sleep. I'll wake you when the speech is about to happen."