The Frustration Compulsion: Chapter 36

The Next Step Forward

*a/n Hey guys, this chapter is so darn late and I cannot even function knowing it's so late. Yes, I did read all your responses and you can look on the bottom of this chapter for the list of songs on the CD that Sheldon made Amy. That song in the last chapter was called By Your Side by LifeHouse. Anyway, the last chapter got so many many reviews and I love you all for that. Once again, I deeply apologize for this chapter being so late, but hopefully I'll have more time to write in this four month hiatus that's on it's way within the next week. Hope you enjoy this chapter, don't forget to tell me what you think of it! (: *Insert disclaimer here* Until next time!~

Previously…

Stumbling backwards through the dark,

I know how it feels to be alone

And where we go is where I wanna be.

In the silence, I hear you say to me…

"I'll be by your side, when all hope has died. I will still be around and I'm still by your side. When everything's wrong, I will still be around by your side."

With his lips so close to her ear, the words softly made their way to her heart, and in her heart they would stay, forever.

Currently…

It wasn't uncommon for weather phenomena to occur in Texas, but that didn't mean that Sheldon was expecting such a thing to happen. It was nothing major, just a little heavy rain and some flash flood warnings, so that meant the following day of the Shamy's vacation had to be spent indoors.

To Sheldon's dismay, there seemed to be absolutely nothing to do around his old home. All his card games had been packed up and resided at his apartment in Pasadena, along with his video games, movies, and everything else he used to entertain himself. The only thing he had with him was his laptop, some miscellany white boards, and his imagination.

It didn't help that sleep had enveloped Amy some several hours prior. Why wasn't she up anyway? He knew it was fairly early, but she had gotten more than enough sleep. So why wasn't she by his side?

She would probably know what to do in his time of boredom. All his equations and Theories just weren't grabbing his attention today. He wanted to revisit their game of Counterfactuals, shoot some Fun With Flags, do something with her because he missed her so darn much, even if he had seen her last night.

It was that kind of thinking that made him ache even more just to be near her. The thought had him practically bouncing in his seat.

But could he do it? Could he wake her up, just for his benefit? He thought so, but that was until he waltzed right into his room to see how perfect she looked while she slept.

So then he just kinda froze right in his spot, watching silently as her chest gently rose and fell with every breath that she took. How such a simple action could make him so breathless, he didn't know.

Her subconscious seemed to be working in overdrive, though, and he was sure that it had somehow sensed him watching her. Not even two minutes later, she was stirring back into consciousness, making him feel slightly guilty for waking her. He hoped she wouldn't be too upset with him.

In fact, that happened to be the exact opposite. She awoke slowly with a smile on her face, and she seemed pleasantly surprised when he greeted her at the foot of his bed.

"Good morning, Amy." He couldn't suppress the small smile that formed against his lips as he looked her sleepy form up and down. Her night gown certainly outlined her body very well, from what he could see of it.

"Morning, Sheldon. You look happy, may I ask why?" He could tell that her vision of him was slightly hazy, because she kept squinting at him in the most adorable way. Without any hesitation whatsoever, he walked over to the night stand and retrieved her glasses for her. At least then she'd be able to see.

"I was wondering… since the weather is so bad… would you be willing to spend some time with me?" His innocent tone made Amy's heart flutter just a bit, so she smiled and nodded while shifting over in the bed, allowing for him to sit down next to her.

"Did you have something in mind that you wanted to do?" Even though she tried so very hard to hide it, Sheldon could definitely tell how tired she was and it did not help his guilt at all. He bit his lip nervously and stared into Amy's eyes, as if asking for her permission to take up her time.

"Well, not really… you look really tired, maybe we should just take a nap for a while, and figure out the rest later…" Amy couldn't believe it. Sheldon almost never suggested sleeping in, plus, he wanted to sleep beside her! There was no way she was letting such an opportunity pass by.

He watched on quietly as she slowly leaned back and rested her head on the pillow. Not long after, he rested his body beside her, and there they were… lying in bed together.

It wasn't the first time they had done such a thing together, but his heart still raced when she was so close to him. It was almost an instinct now to wrap his arm around her and pull her close to him, just so she could lie her head on his chest.

Even Sheldon couldn't deny it was a perfect way to fall asleep.

#

Never before in his life had Sheldon been so content without moving, but yet so agitated with every moment he didn't. He never wanted to leave Amy's side, but yet, they had already slept in a full three hours! What was he supposed to do, sleep his day away?

Oh, but he loved her so much it literally gave him pain to think about being separated from her, even if it was just in the other room. Since when had they become so attached at the hip?

So after some careful thought, he decided to poke her gently in the arm in a failed attempt at waking her up. In a way, it gave him relief that he hadn't woken her, but he still wasn't getting anywhere with the whole situation.

However, his whole mind went absolutely blank when Amy rolled over so her back was to him, but his name escaped from her lips in a muffled sigh. Was she awake and aware that he was trying to wake her up, or was she dreaming of him…?

He could picture it right then and there, her dreaming about their perfect wedding reception, dancing the night away as he softly whispered into her ear all the things that he loved about her. Together, they would throw the best wedding in all of history, because he believed nobody had a stronger bond and held more love for each other than they did.

But maybe that was his own imagination running wild. Maybe it was simply the fact that her subconscious knew he was next to her, so naturally, she was dreaming about him. Or maybe she wasn't dreaming about him at all, per say. Maybe she was dreaming about an alternate universe Sheldon, one that was still having issues with giving all of himself to her. Then what?

She still reached for him in her sleepy state as she rolled back over and clasped his hand in hers. He wondered how that was even possible, could she actually be awake? Was she trying to prolong the moment because she knew how much he would want to get up?

If she had been up, she was doing a fabulous job of acting as if she had just woken up. As her eyes fluttered open, they were met with his, and for a moment, the smiles that were exchanged between them spoke more words than anything else could have.

Did he really want such a moment to end so quickly?

He couldn't deny that he didn't, but he never was one to stay in bed literally all day. They had to get up some time.

And she seemed to know that, because she got out of bed a moment later, seemingly forgetting just exactly what she was wearing and how much of her buttocks she was exposing to him.

Dear Lord he was never going to be able to look at her backside the same way again.

Swallowing, he brought his gaze back up to her face and decided to speak up before she left the room. "Where are you going?"

She looked back at him for a moment as if he were crazy. "Well, let's see, I have a bladder, so… I think the rest is pretty self explanatory." Although he didn't always understand why, Sheldon loved it when she was blunt about things like that. It just showed how much she wasn't afraid to speak her mind.

"Okay, but hurry back, I didn't get a chance to give you your good morning kiss yet." It was utterly amazing how much Amy's eyes perked up at that statement. He could tell how much she had been wanting him to kiss her, and it made him feel better, knowing that she wanted it just as much as he did.

"Y-you… wanna kiss me?" Well of course he wanted to kiss her. He had been doing so for quite a while at that point, he couldn't help but wonder why exactly she was so surprised.

"Of course I want to kiss you. I always want to kiss you. Your lips are so soft…" He hadn't meant to sink into a daze then, thinking about how nice it was to kiss her, but by the time he realized what had happened, she was already gone, hopefully to return shortly.

So Sheldon looked around. It wasn't like he hadn't ever been in his room before, but there was something different about it since Amy had slept in there with him. Something about it seemed almost… complete.

And she was back before his train of thought could go any further. From the front, he could tell that her night gown only went up to about mid thigh, something he had never considered her wearing before. Why on Earth had she conserved such a beautiful body for all this time?

But yet, he was rather grateful. He was the only one who would ever get to see all of her one day, and the thought made him ever so thankful.

By the time she sat back down next to him, his mind had gone blank, but he still had managed to lean in and kiss the sense out of her. It didn't start off that way, having been a rather gentle kiss full of passion with a hint of lust. He knew he couldn't take it too far, but it'd be fun to experiment..

The knot that had formed in his stomach sometime before he had started kissing her was slowly vanishing, replaced with a feeling of giddiness and excitement. Every time he kissed her, there was something there, something more than a connection of the mind. It was almost as if every part of them was in sync, and he was loving it.

Not only that, but he could tell just how much she was loving it too. She had practically melted at his touch, and the eagerness she held seemingly radiated off of her body.

This was unlike any of their other kisses had been before, and what was he supposed to think of it? Well, he couldn't even think a single coherent thought until her lips weren't pressed into his, so he really didn't know.

And suddenly there were footsteps on the other side of the door. Thank God Amy had had the sense to close the door before she had gotten back into bed with him.

She seemed to have more control than he, and he couldn't even express how much it helped in their situation. Had she not pulled away from him in that moment and bolted up out of bed, they probably would have been caught making out, right then and there.

They'd have to finish their activities later…

#

Mary seemed to have other plans.

"Shelly, you and Amy need to hurry up and eat, we need to be at church in the next half hour." His excitement for the day quickly diminished then as his shoulders sagged slightly and he looked at Amy for help. He could tell that she didn't want to go either, but what choice did they have?

"I thought you only went to church on Sundays…" He knew exactly what she was going to say to him. She always told him the same thing, how it didn't matter if you went on a weekday or a Sunday, but he really didn't see the point.

"No, there's no service today, but I need you two to come with me so I can prove to the Pastor that you're actually getting married!" Good Lord, it was only his first day of being engaged and she had to go tell the whole world. If there was one thing he knew for certain, it was that he wasn't going unless Amy was.

And from the expectant look Mary gave her, he knew she'd be going. Not exactly the plans he had had in mind, but he still got to spend the day with her. That in itself was perfect already.

"And he didn't believe you when you told him before?" Amy asked from the kitchen where she was searching the fridge for a bottle of water. What his mother was about to bring up had always been an uncomfortable topic for him, but she was bound to find out sometime.

"Nobody ever believed that Shelly would get married. Even I didn't believe it for a time." That wasn't surprising. On several occasions in his young adult life, Mary had told him this exact thing, so by then he was used to hearing it.

"I know the feeling. I haven't even told my mom yet…" That was peculiar. Sheldon thought that the first thing she would do was call somebody, anybody, to tell them of their news. She hadn't once texted Penny, Bernadette, or anyone else, and to top it off, even her family didn't know…?

"Excuse me; I am not some kind of pet monkey that you can show off to all of your church friends." Somehow, Mary knew Sheldon was going to put up a fight, but he wasn't getting out of this one. It was the least he could do since he only came for Christmas.

"Sheldon, come on! It'll be fun. If you don't go, I won't get to see you at all tomorrow." Amy did have a point. He didn't want to leave her alone like that for such a long period of time, even though he'd have to start doing that when he went back to work. Even so, he'd always find ways to spend time with her.

"Fine, but we are not making a habit out of this." He was trying to be all serious, pointing his finger at her, as if he could keep her from doing something. She knew deep down that he'd never be able to say no to her again, although he'd certainly try.

#

"Good evenin' Pastor Mat!" Mary was awfully cheerful to be in what she called 'The Lord's house' while Sheldon and Amy stood a little ways behind her, their hands clasped together. Neither looked very impressed, but they didn't complain.

"Yes, hello Mary, Sheldon." This man was very serious in a way, and from what Sheldon knew about him, he seldom smiled. His greetings were always a hello with a nod of his heart, but his eyes widened slightly more than usual when he laid eyes on Amy.

"Shelly here's getting' married!" For the first time in his life, Sheldon actually saw the Pastor break out into a grin. He didn't know how to process it really, and he felt even more uncomfortable when he was suddenly patting his back. He was just so close to his body…

But then Amy squeezed his hand, and all the tension melted away. He even managed a small smile when the Pastor pulled away to look him in the eyes.

"Looks like the Lord's really blessed ya." Sheldon had to work a little bit to resist the urge to roll his eyes, but everyone could tell he wasn't buying what the Pastor was telling him. They learned not to take it personally though.

"Indeed he has." Mary jumped in with a nod of her head. Sheldon could practically read her mind, he knew what she was going to bring up next, and he had only hoped he wouldn't have to be around for that part of the conversation. So when Mary turned her back to them and pulled the Pastor into an important discussion, Sheldon tugged on Amy's hand.

"Come with me." Before she could even protest, he had pulled her away with him and out the back door of the Church. Within moments, they were standing in the middle of an opened field, surrounded by yellow and orange flowers that Sheldon didn't care too much for.

"Why are we out here?" Not that she had anything against it, but she felt it was sort of rude to walk away from someone you literally just met.

When she looked up at him, his eyes were the softest they had been in a long time, and seemingly all he could do was stare into her eyes. She was sure she'd never get used to the feeling.

"Because I just can't keep my hands off of you." And within moments, his hand had found its way to her hip as he held onto it firmly. Out in the open, he freely planted a kiss onto her lips, one that had both their knees going weak within seconds.

The best part about that kiss was when Sheldon smiled into it, and Amy thought her heart was going to explode. She was engaged to such a great kisser, and she had no doubt of how strong his love was for her.

But the majority of her mind was elsewhere. She couldn't stop worrying about what how her family would react to her recent engagement. They could be very… off-putting, when it came to that sort of thing. She could only hope they wouldn't make a scene.

Her stomach clenched with the thought and she grimaced. Did she really have to tell them? Of course she did, but in a perfect world, she didn't.

And then Sheldon broke the kiss, surprisingly in order to pull her into the sweetest hug of a lifetime. Maybe he had read her mind; maybe he could sense something was wrong. Whatever his reason, he sure knew how to comfort her.

"Amy, you need to stop worrying. You want to marry me, right?" What kind of question was that? Of course she wanted to marry him! She was in love with him, after all. What more could she want.

Nodding, her eyes dropped back down to his lips. His sweet tone and loving embrace had helped to calm her immensely, and now all she wanted to do was to get closer to him, physically, emotionally, whatever worked, because she loved him that much.

"We'll get through this. From now on, your problems are mine and mine are yours. We're in this together, it's just you and me, nobody else matters." Why on Earth wasn't this man some sort of inspirational speaker? He was so amazing every time it hit her like a freight train and she couldn't get over it.

"I'm so glad we decided to do this…" Her voice was barely above a whisper, and her breath tickled Sheldon's lips. He loved it when she was so close to him, but only she was allowed to do that. He couldn't even fathom the thought of loving anyone else. The thought was utterly repulsive, in fact.

"Me too. I don't think I tell you enough how much I love you." Her reassuring smile made him feel all warm inside, and it was one of the greatest feelings in the world. Even better than new comic book night and trains combined.

"I love you too." She hugged him closer to her and rested her head on his chest. He kissed the top of her head and just held her close in the still of the evening. Something about the quietness of the place they were in gave them such a calming feeling that they never wanted it to end, ever.

"Do you think you'll be able to sleep on your own tonight?" Well that came out of nowhere. Amy was slightly confused as to why he was asking her that, but she was pretty sure it was his way of asking to sleep with her. She knew that was the only thing they'd probably do, but in all honesty, she had wanted him to sleep with her for a while at that point.

"I don't know, maybe." The thought about being separated from Sheldon for the night seemed more repellant than it had in the past, and she assumed it was because their bond had gotten a lot stronger in the past weeks. There was still a long time to go before they had to sleep, but she knew she wouldn't be able to stop thinking about it until then.

"You don't really sound like you want to sleep alone. I don't know about you, but I'd sleep better with you by my side…"

"And your mother will let us do that?" Amy wanted nothing more than to take his offer, but something about it felt almost rebellious. It gave her an adrenaline rush just thinking about it.

"Amy, when you find something that works for you, you have to go for it. I'm sorry if this sounds a little vogue, but we're basically fighting the inevitable. My mother will have to deal with it at some point."

Even she couldn't deny the fact that she absolutely loved take charge Sheldon. There was just something so… erotic about it.

"You're really sure about this, aren't you?"

"Have I ever been known to lie to you?" That was true. The best thing they had between them was trust; she could always count on him to tell her the truth.

"I guess not." Before either of them could do or say anything else, the back door in which they had exited opened, revealing Mary and Pastor Mat in the doorway.

"Guess who just booked the wedding reception?!"

*Sorry if this ending was kinda crappy, I just didn't want this chapter to be too long. Don't forget to tell me what you think if you still follow, and for those of you who were wondering, these are the songs on the CD:

Fall for you, Secondhand Serenade

I'll be, Edwin Mccain

She will be loved, Maroon 5

Just What I Needed, The Cars

Breathless, Shayne Ward

By Your Side, Lifehouse

Coffee Shop, Landon Pigg

Never Stop by Safety Suit

Everything, Lifehouse

…and sorry if these songs suck xD Idk.