Chapter 35.
*DISCLAIMER* I only own Addie, Jessie, Rosie, Lily, Will (Carstairs) and Sizzy's baby. All other rights go to Cassandra Clare.
*ISABELLE'S P.O.V.*
Magnus doesn't say anything, and I know it's because the chances my baby are okay are unlikely. He keeps his hands on my belly for a few minutes before he starts making a portal.
"Is the baby okay?" Jace asks, his eyes still wide with horror.
"I don't know." Magnus says "I couldn't feel any movement but it doesn't guarantee anything."
"Should we take her to the hospital or the silent brothers?" Alec asks, letting me grab onto his hand for comfort.
"Hospital, my friend Catrina Loss works there as a nurse but she has trained as a midwife too, she could help us, I'm worried the stress of being in the silent city would put Izzy under could put the baby in even more danger." Magnus says. I know it's stupid, but I am terrified of the silent brothers and it stresses me out when I have to go near them or the silent city.
"I'll come with you to the hospital. Clary, Jace, get our parents and tell them what happened and to meet us at the hospital." Alec says.
"Of course, come on Jace." Clary says, taking him by the hand and pulling him out after her.
*10 minutes later*
*in the hospital*
"I-is my baby okay?" I ask Catrina, as she pushes the ultrasound transducer- as she called it- harder onto my belly.
"I can't tell yet." She calmly says, her eyes never moving from the screen.
"I swear to the angle I am going to kill Raphael Santiago." Alec says, under his breath. I hope he does, especially if my baby isn't okay.
Just as I'm about to give up hope that my baby is okay, the room is filled with a loud, strong, thudding sound, that I recognize as my baby's heartbeat.
"He's okay!" I exclaim in relief.
"For now." Catrina says "The angle at which your stomach hit the wall and the force of it, caused your placenta to de-tach from the wall of your womb." She says. That doesn't sound good at all!
"Is it partial or complete?" Magnus asks.
"Partial, thankfully." Catrina says.
"So what are you going to do? How can you fix it?" I ask.
"We can't, since it's a partial we will monitor you for the rest of your pregnancy and put you on bed rest, I know you've been kicking up a fight about not being able to train or fight, this is why you cannot be an active shadowhunter during pregnancy." Catrina says.
"So I can't do anything until the baby is born?" I ask.
"Nothing physically demanding, no. However, because of this and your high blood pressure I think it would be better to induce you and have you deliver early." Catrina says.
"How early?" I ask.
"Well shadowhunter babies reach full maturity in the womb at about eight months, but a woman could still be pregnant for the full nine months. I think it would be best if we have you deliver at eight months. Who is your midwife? I want to discuss it with them." Catrina says. I never even thought about a midwife, I've had a few check-ups at a different hospital with different nurses and doctors, but that's it.
"I don't have one." I say.
"Well if you want I could be your midwife." Catrina says. I think I'd like that, she's nice, she's professional, she really seems to know what she's doing and Magnus trusts her so she must be good.
"O-okay." I say. "Sure."
*Half an hour later*
While lying in my hospital bed, thinking about Simon and whether or not he's alive and if I'll ever see him again, I hear a voice belonging to someone I really don't want to see right now.
"Isabelle!" Annamarie says, walking over to my bed.
I want to tell her to go away, to leave me alone, I can't bear to talk about the adoption anymore, I can't take hearing her call herself the baby's mom, I'm sick of hearing about what she wants me to do with my body during my labour and delivery. "Isabelle are you alright, is the baby okay?" She asks, taking a seat beside my bed.
"Yeah, we're both fine." I say,
"I'm so sorry about Simon, nobody's giving up trying to get him free, Izzy, your brother and Jace have gone back there along with your father." She tells me. Well... maybe now dad's there they might have a better chance at getting Simon free.
"Oh okay." I quietly say, hoping my lack of effort to keep the conversation up, will make Annamarie leave.
"Well, I was thinking about the baby today and where he should be born and_" Annamarie starts, but I cut her off.
"Stop, please just stop, stop talking about the baby as is if you're carrying him, it's not your choice where he's born, t's mine and I don't know where I'm going to give birth yet, but I know I'm going to decide and only me. I'm the one going through it, I don't care if you don't want me to use painkillers during the birth, there's no way I'm not, I'm seventeen you can't expect to give birth without help!" I exclaim.
Unsurprisingly, Annamarie looks taken aback.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel like I don't care about you." She softly says. She goes to squeeze my hand, but I pull away.
"It doesn't matter." I say.
"Okay, well I thought you might like to know I chose his name today." Annamarie says. No, no I don't want to know.
"I don't want to know; I don't want to know what you are going to name my baby." I say.
"Isabelle… are you having second thoughts about the adoption?" She asks. I kind of am, from the moment Simon and I agreed on adoption, the thought of placing my son with someone else has torn my heart in half, but now that Simon might not be coming back, I can't let someone else raise his son, I won't.
"Yeah." I quietly say. "I can't do this, not without Simon. It's hard enough with him, but if he's gone for good... I can't give up his son." I say.
"But Isabelle it's not like you wouldn't see the baby all the time, you could even stay over at mine and help me with him all you like, it would almost be like co-parenting." She says. I can do that if I have Simon by my side, if I know for sure that's he's okay with someone else raising our baby, but if he isn't here, and I can't guarantee he wasn't having second thoughts too, I can't go through with the adoption.
"I can't do it without Simon." I repeat.
"Isabelle, this is hardly fair_"
"None of this is fair! It's not fair that I've wanted to be a mom more than anything for the last few years and when I get pregnant, I'm only seventeen. It's not fair that I finally found someone I can settle down with, who I can see myself growing old with, having kids with, and then he gets torn away from me. It's not fair that my brother, who has never been anything but good and loyal, could be exiled at any moment just because he loves another man. It's not fair that you agreed to marry my dad while he was still with my mom." I know that last one was uncalled for, but I am so angry at Annamarie right now, for never even considering I may want to do things differently to her when I have the baby, and I want to hurt her, like she and my dad hurt my mom.
"Isabelle, I didn't know your father hadn't divorced your mother when we were together, I left him because he wanted to walk out on all of you for good." Annamarie says. "I don't care, just… leave me alone, please. I'll let you know when I've made my mind up about the baby, but until then, if you have to say anything to me, tell my dad to pass it on to me." I say.
"Alright… fine if that's what you want." Annamarie says sounding like she's trying to hold back tears.
When she leaves, I start sobbing into my pillow, wishing more than anything that I had Simon here, to wrap his arms around me and comfort me.
*The next day*
*TESSA'S P.O.V.*
"Careful Tavvy, the babies are trying to sleep." Eleanor Blackthorn says. We haven't had very many visitors today, since everyone is so pre occupied with getting Simon free and making sure Isabelle and her baby are okay. I don't mind of course, if I hadn't just given birth I'd be out there trying to free Simon, too, I hope more than anything that they do free him safe and sound and that Isabelle and the baby are alright, I can't imagine what that poor girl is going through right now, or how worried Robert and Maryse must be about her. If it were my Jessie or Lily I don't know what I would do, and if either of my boys were in Simon's situation, I'd lose my life.
"Oh, sorry babies." Tavvy whispers, kissing their foreheads, not realizing Eleanor meant he was waking them by kissing them over and over. He means no harm of course, he's just a baby himself, he doesn't understand. It's lovely to have him and Eleanor here, hopefully Andrew and the rest of the kids will visit at some stage too, along with Cordelia, John and Emma.
"Okay baby maybe you should just sit back from the babies for a minute." Eleanor says, lifting him onto her lap. She's a wonderful mother, she clearly loves her children more than anything in this world and cherishes them like the gifts they are. She never loses her cool with them, of course she gets frustrated from time to time, any parent would, but she manages to keep a level head at all times.
"He's getting so big." I say, it's hard to believe how fast little toddlers like Tavvy grow, they seem to change every day.
"Oh I know; I can't believe my little baby is two… Tessa… I have some news, bad news." She suddenly says. Oh no, not more.
"What is it?" I ask in a worried tone.
"Well... you know how I've been sick for the past few weeks?" She asks, I nod. "I went to the silent brothers about it yesterday… and it's not good at all." She says.
"What is it?" I ask, terrified of her answer.
Covering Tavvy's ears, in a tight tone of voice, she says
"I have cancer… terminal cancer."
I really hope you enjoyed! Please let me know what you thought, in a review. I know before this I had been gone for so long most of you probably stopped reading my stories but to anyone who is still reading, please let me know what you thought, it really encourages me to keep writing, I adore hearing what you think, it's makes me want to write more!
Thanks for reading.