Author's Note: It's been a long time and I'm sorry and holy hell so much has happened but I'm not wasting words. Thanks for your patience, reading, reviewing, favorites, and follows. You're all amazing! I sincerely hope to be able to update this on a regular basis now. And as always, if you have any suggestions send 'em my way :).

"I can't do this."

"Yes you can."

"No, I can't!" Butters whined as he looked at the two items on the kitchen table. From over the phone, he heard Wendy Testaburger sigh heavily and he knew he was done for. There was no arguing with her; she knew his strengths more than he did. Same with Kenny.

"Trust me, I know Kenny. He can handle this." Butters scoffed and picked up the lighter. He flicked the switch in the same pattern and watched with disinterested eyes as the flame sparked to life, then died; over and over again. Kenny was kind of like fire, he supposed.

"Well, so do I and this is evil."

"Not really if you know what you're doing," Butters smirked at that, and he knew that the raven-haired woman was blushing on the other line.

"Oh, so you do?" He teased, causing her to scoff. She and Eric didn't talk much about their relationship; no one was exactly quite sure if they had ever had sex or not. And frankly, it wasn't their business. So they didn't push.

"Shut up," Wendy deflected. "You called for my advice and this is what I'm giving you."

"What if it burns him?"

"It shouldn't be that hot, otherwise they wouldn't use it for treatments," Butters shrugged at that; that was true. "You're recording this one, right?"

"Yeah," he replied, then ran a hand through his hair, "I figured my blog needed an update." Wendy laughed at that, and Butters smiled weakly. He didn't know if that was necessarily true; Kenny was doing just fine making comics for his own blog, and was also working on creating flash animation for a comic about their childhood. The process was interesting, to say the least.

"Good, give me credit?" Butters sighed and mumbled a quick goodbye before he hung up the phone.

Butters looked at the lighter, then back at the candle warmer on the table. Most of the purple wax had melted by now, and the lavender scent practically overpowered the entire first story of their house.

"Ow," he mumbled as he picked up the candle jar. Butters then made sweater paws with his hoodie and carefully walked up the stairs; the last thing he wanted was wax on their carpet, or on the stairs where one of them, most likely Kenny, would slip and get hurt.

Carefully, Butters entered the bedroom and set down the jar on his nightstand. Kenny was snoring quietly in his sleep as he lay face down on his pillow. Perfect. With cautious fingers, he pulled back the sheet that covered his nude body, and he felt his stomach coil as he gazed down at his back. He was pale, but he could see the lean muscle that he envisioned contracting and stretching with every slight movement.

Butters was done for, and he shook his head to temporarily rid himself of his lusty thoughts. He had a task at hand, one that would quite possibly lead to raunchy sex; and if it didn't then Butters knew just how to make Kenny feel better.

He picked up the jar full of melted wax and stood above Kenny. His hand quivered slightly as he began to tip the glass container. He watched as it ran in a thick purple stream from the jar and onto his relaxed back. In an instant, those muscles clenched and the bright blonde had a sudden urge to pounce on his back and dig his nails deep in his skin. That would be a wake up call in itself.

"Wh-wha?" Kenny gasped, then let out a pained yelp as he felt more wax splatter and cool on his skin. He spun around and glared with sleepy eyes up at Butters, who smiled innocently as he sloshed the liquid around. "What're you doing?"

"Waking you up." Was all he said, before letting a few drops fall from the jar, onto Kenny's chest. The dark blonde hissed in pain and gritted his teeth as he looked up at his husband.

"That burns," he didn't seem angry, although he looked rather irritated. But Butters just smiled down at him.

"Real bad?" Kenny shook his head and rubbed his eyes.

"It feels like I have a shit ton of skin on my back. It's weird."

"I drew a wax penis on your back," Kenny snickered and his expression softened considerably. He shook his head and gazed up at Butters, who was torn between standing and straddling him.

"That's kind of appropriate," Butters tilted his head slightly and blushed as Kenny wiggled his eyebrows. "Where did you get this idea?"

"A... a source," Butters trailed off; he didn't want thoughts of Wendy or Cartman killing the mood. His aloofness seemed to amuse Kenny, who leaned back with his hands pressed against his back.

"Huh, did that source tell you to draw a dick on me?" Butters shook his head. "I take it that was a premonition then."

"What do you-" Butters stopped himself, and his cheeks flushed even harder. "Oh."

"Yeah," Kenny breathed as he laughed. "C'mere with that wax," Butters bit his lip and lowered himself on Kenny's lap. Yep, it definitely did the trick he was hoping for. His eyes watched as Kenny lay back a little more, then gave a nod. "Go ahead."

Butters let the wax drip from the jar and he felt Kenny tense beneath him. He bit down on his lip, yet he wore a soft smile as he watched Butters decorate his skin with lavender scented candle wax. It was weird, but it was nice. Not necessarily the turn on Kenny thought it would be, but in a sense it was relaxing. Which was weird to him.

"It's like body paint," Butters mumbled as he traced the dried wax on Kenny's chest. The younger man looked up with a slight smirk and put his hand on the back of Butters' neck. "Except I can't eat it." Kenny chuckled at that, and nodded as he lay back on the bed, grimacing as he felt the wax on his back crack against his skin. That was weird too.

Butters followed suit, and soon they were chest to chest. Kenny's hands slowly took the jar, and Butters wore a worried expression as Kenny held it over him. He jerked as he felt hot droplets splash against his skin, only to dry as they began to streak down his back. His body had jerked against Kenny's, who bit back a moan from the friction.

"Was this your idea?" Kenny asked as Butters held the jar over his throat, he gasped as it singed his neck, and dried in purple wax spatters on his neck. Butters nodded and bit beneath the lowest drop, causing Kenny to let out a pained groan. "To get me all hot and b-bothered with wax?"

"Well, considering the last time I played with wax..." Kenny glanced down at his leg and laughed softly.

"This is better, much better," the dark blonde decided, before he captured Butters' lips against his. He barely noted Butters let the jar rest on the bed next to them, and as he rolled over, his leg kicked against the glass. Butters didn't notice this, and Kenny was lost in the heated ministrations.

As they fell back on the bed, a quiet thump was ignored, and as they fought for dominance never declared, the wax dripped from the candle, onto the floor, and solidified like a little purple waterfall.