"Dedication to an ideal isn't enough. I need something closer, something to actually look at to ground myself when the darkness seems insurmountable."

I hesitated, looking into her eyes.

"Something like you."

I set Z to sorting out the cargo hold into discreet crates by type and seller while offering the rest of the Ebon Hawk's passengers and crew the chance of shore leave for the day. Or the week, so long as they remained in contact. My only other condition was that they show up to their appointments for implant ports - we'd been forced to spread out over a three day period due to few openings on such short notice.

Bastila chose to remain with me, as I'd expected. Onasi didn't want to leave me alone with any of the Jedi, but he did take an hour to pick up some blaster upgrades and, presumably, send encoded transmissions to the Republic fleet. I had given T3 control of navigation and communications aboard the Hawk, which essentially locked out anyone else without my permission. Onasi was not especially pleased with that decision.

Canderous headed off to talk to the local Mandalorians, Mission took Sasha out shopping in one of the more reputable regions, and Bindo said something about catching up with an old friend.

Juhani simply vanished without telling me where she was heading. Since the incident with Xor the night before, I assumed she would be giving the matter thought in private. I worried about being unable to affect her decision, but trusted that I would make better progress by subtly encouraging her to think for herself than by anything too overt. Pushing her too hard would only drive her away. Slow. Patience.

I'd taken Xor to a particularly shady group who specialized in no-questions-asked prisoner holding. I really didn't want to know why I knew about them, though the depth and detail of my knowledge of Nar Shaddaa remained a vague weight upon my mind. I trusted Bastila, but I did not trust the Jedi Council.

While there, I asked after any short term jobs they might have available for the subduing of large groups or gangs. I wanted to practice extending my Force abilities' range and number of targets before going to Korriban. Dark Jedi training grounds tended to be volatile and dangerous to those who couldn't immediately demonstrate superiority.

Armed with the list of targets and their accompanying instructions and payments, I led Bastila and Onasi on an excursion several layers deeper into Nar Shaddaa's shady underbelly.

We all wore full-face helmets I'd obtained for the purpose of disguise and concealment of our features. They didn't match either our outfits or each other, giving us a quite satisfactory appearance of rag-tag mercs.

I strongly suspected that on Nar Shaddaa, especially this far down, we needed little more than to parade around looking like easy marks. But in case no one was feeling particularly territorial or aggressive, I could always fall back on the list of targets.

We'll be practicing with darkness today, I told Bastila mentally. It will probably feel unnatural and wrong to you at first. Tell me if you think it's too much, and we'll stop for the day. Don't try to force yourself to go too far too fast, remember caution in everything.

Bastila nodded, her curiosity reverberating against me. Some part of her wanted to turn back, but it was buried and suppressed by her determination to see this through whatever it took.

I smiled proudly, leading Onasi to give us what I assumed to be a glare. It was hard to tell facial expressions under the helmets. Mine was open and clear at the front, but his was closer to a Mandalorian style and the one-way transparasteel gave a sinister darkness. I only grinned wider, which I knew would irritate him further.

I still hoped that he'd come around somehow, but in the meantime I'd reverted to teasing him mercilessly as though we were still constantly-shouting buddies. Not verbally, but with my actions and attitudes. The familiarness of me seemed to be making no headway with him, but at least he hadn't outright left. I guess he thought it more important to keep an eye on us and try to 'protect' my impressionable Sisters from my influence than flee to safety himself.

I hoped it wouldn't come to that. I didn't want to be forced to kill him, but the longer he stubbornly insisted on opposing me the harder it would become to restrain my aggressive impulses, especially when I was specifically working on training those aggressive impulses. It would be a delicate balance to walk, but then power and danger generally went hand in hand and the balance would be precarious with or without Onasi around to exacerbate it.

"Well, well, well. And who do you think you are, wandering our streets like you own the place?" The voice was silky and guttural at the same time, speaking in Huttese. It snapped me into attention, and I consciously didn't bring out my lightsaber.

Be ready, Bastila. Force powers only, no direct engagement. This is practice, remember, but keep your guard up or they may be able to harm you. We don't have Juhani here to heal.

Bastila nodded acknowledgment and I switched my attention to the group spread out to block our way.

There were five of them in front, and another four blocking our escape from behind but a relatively non-threatening distance away. They varied in species, but the speaker appeared to be a Devaronian female. She had a clearly-modified disruptor pistol held casually in one hand, but unlike her eight lackeys wasn't aiming at us.

"We're here looking for the Skack-jarn family," I said, reciting one of the 'bounty' targets we weren't actually chasing.

"And you think they're here?" demanded a green-skinned twi'lek male, standing to the left of the devaronian. He had a heavy repeater leveled on us.

I shrugged. "We think they're on Nar Shaddaa, yes."

I made my tone deliberately arrogant, dismissive. If I wanted to, I could probably have calmed down the situation and had us each gone our separate ways. But we were here to practice Force powers, not diplomacy.

Ripples of anger and threat vibrated through the Force around us. I grinned eagerly, drank it in. "Now either show us where you're hiding them or get out of our way," I demanded.

Feel it, Bastila, I instructed mentally. Echo it, let it come through you and out. Direct it, copy what I do if you can.

"We are not tour guides for fools," spat the devaronian. "Leave."

"No," I said, planting a fist on my hip and smirking at her. "We go where we please, now stand aside if you know what's good for you."

"You and your two friends will stand against us all? Fools."

"You don't want to do that," Onasi said suddenly. "If you want to live, you'll turn and run right now. They're Dark Jedi."

I turned and glared at him. "What is your problem!? They're just thugs, why are you trying to protect them."

The confidence had begun to fade from the surrounding thugs, unease flowing around them.

"Dark Jedi?"

"We don't want to tangle with Malak."

"The Sith, here?"

That did it. "I'm not Sith and I'm not a dark Jedi!" I screamed, lashing out with Force energy. My lightning was defuse, not concentrated enough to kill. It actually took considerable focus to kill with lightning, I'd learned. Of course, I was quite adept at killing focus when I wanted.

The lightning, accompanied by a flare of undirected Force, sent those in front stumbling back under the staggering weight of my attack. I pushed aside my instinctive rage, focused on my purpose here. Crushing Force, gathered around my hands, directed forward. Hold, switch, hold, switch. Keep them off balance. Don't let anyone recover too much.

Onasi ducked into a side alley, deliberately refusing to get involved. Two of the thugs behind us just broke and ran. Bastila wasn't able to hold them yet, hadn't discovered how to accept her darker abilities. It split my attention too far, grabbing and pulling them back with the Force. Three of those in front managed to recover and fire.

I pushed out against their blaster fire, but unfortunately the devaronian with the disruptor had a killer aim. Disruptor pistols were unblockable, their energy moving at speeds and on a frequency which no shield, armor, or Force ability had yet been able to intercept. As such, they were highly illegal, incredibly expensive, and very popular with thugs of all varieties. If you wanted to be big-time, you had to have a disruptor.

The Force warned me to dodge, but the beam burned through my arm , my body an instant slower than the disruptor. If I hadn't had that split-second advantage, I'd have been actually dead. The injury wasn't any more dangerous than being speared by a lightsaber, but it hurt and would slow any attacks with my left hand.

The pain brought fury into sharp focus. I grabbed the devaronian leader, directing crushing Force with one hand to hold her and keep her held, while I rapidly switched attention between the other four in front of me.

Bastila struggled beside me, trying to hold off the four behind us with a combination of clever pushing and pulling and mental manipulation. I couldn't help her, my attention already split so far I could barely keep the Force moving quickly enough. If I hadn't been so busy trying to keep four armed thugs at bay with one hand, or had been willing to risk the disruptor their leader held, I could have used focused lightning to bring it to a quicker end.

But that was exactly the point of the whole exercise, learning the speed and strength necessary for split-second control without relying on other Force abilities or a lightsaber.

I hoped Bastila could hold her own, because I really couldn't help. Our mental Force flowed up against each other, but I couldn't spare attention for showing her anything specific. I sensed her reaching, unsure and tentative, toward the power she didn't quite understand.

The air was full of fear, anger, aggression. Emotions flowing freely through our assailants, through me, through her. Just take it in, use it all. I didn't have time to concentrate on forming the thought into words, but the intent and push of it transmitted clearly enough.

Choke. Pull. Push. Hold.

I had my hands full with the five ahead of me, Force moving in rapid bursts to keep them all off balance, unable to bring their weapons around, unable to break and flee. It strained my concentration to its limit. If I didn't have to worry about that disruptor. . .

Focus.

A surge of energy flowed, I sensed Bastila reach out her hand. Her attempt at using crushing Force was weak, tentative, but it was there. I felt the exhilaration thrill through her as she successfully grabbed one of the thugs behind me, held him off the ground struggling feebly. She wasn't pressing hard enough to suffocate him, not putting anywhere near enough energy into it to crush his body, but it kept him from moving against her.

Unfortunately, despite her usual ability to divide focus, she was unused to the particular use of Force in this form. The other three recovered from her kinetic attacks and opened fire. On her, and on my undefended back.

Ah, well. It had been a good start.

I spun, dropped to a crouch so the blaster fire went over my head. Grabbed Force energy from everything and everyone around, I brought it within myself and ignited it with my constant burning rage, simultaneously targeted all nine of our opponents.

I stood, raised my hands, bringing the lightning around in an arc, and brought every bit of focus and energy I had remaining into finishing this now.

It was the first time since Malak's betrayal and my subsequent power loss that I'd actually tried multi-focus targeted lightning rather than the general area-targeted blasts. I wasn't completely sure it would work. But I needed it to and the Force answered my call.

The devaronian leader fell first, my sustained crush on her letting up only as the lightning thundered down with fatal intensity. The screams of our attackers was nearly drowned out by the crackling sizzle and relentless roar of the lightning that danced with Bastila and I standing untouched in its center.

I reached my mind out to hers, showing her the power as it felt through myself. This is what you can become, I told her. Remember this feeling, this power. Draw on it, use it, control it.

The remaining assailants began collapsing, their screams and convulsions ceasing into stillness with the unceasing assault of my lightning.

Bastila's power hesitantly joined with my own, a weak crackle of electricity building at her fingertips. She stared down at it, her mind a confusion of desire and pride and fear and loathing.

Her doubt echoed softly. Is this really what I want to become?

Our last assailant fell still and my lightning storm ceased as suddenly as it had begun. I allowed myself to collapse to the ground, more worn than I'd expected. I sat quietly amid the death and destruction we'd wrought, couldn't summon the energy of a verbal reply. Contentment and triumphant thrill still thrummed through me, and I simply transmitted that sensation of success. Despite imposing such strict handicaps on ourselves we came through victorious.

Well. I may have changed the rules just a little at the end, but it was still no-lightsaber.

"You're crazy," Onasi snapped, emerging from his hiding spot. He gestured at the smoking bodies. "Why would you do that?"

"This is why we came out here," I told him. "They were worthless scum, no doubt, and will not be missed. Perfect for practicing on."

"Practice? This wasn't even one of your bounties, you... you just wanted to provoke someone into attacking so you could practice killing?"

"Force power control against living targets," I corrected. "Their deaths were only necessary to maintain secrecy."

Onasi remained clearly unconvinced, but I didn't care what he thought. Bastila was the one for whom this exercise meant something. I turned to her.

"This is only the start," I warned. "As much as I want you to join me on this path, I would not force you should you choose to turn back."

Bastila's eyes came up to meet mine, blue and clear and firm with resolve, her doubt buried. "I will follow you, wherever the path leads."

I smiled.