Jacobs P.O.V.
The Cullen's were getting ready to leave to go to some sort of ceremony for vegetarian vampires. As weird as that sounds they take their lifestyle very seriously.
"I don't know about this Bella" Edward paced
"Edward, she'll be fine. Jacob is responsible enough to keep an eye on her" Bella was always sticking up for me.
"It is not the eyes I'm worried about, it's his hands. And responsible is not an adjective I'd use to describe him. More like reckless" ouch
"Don't hold back Edward. Tell me how you really feel" I said
"No offense Jacob" He held up his hands.
"It's not like this is the first time we've left him alone with Nessie" Emmett said.
"I f I recall, the last time we came home he was about to deflower her" Edward spat
"This is the part in Nessies life you're just going to have to get over. If they want to be intimate do you honestly think you can stop them?" Said Alice
"It's hard to be intimate once you've been castrated" Edward turned his gaze to me. One of these days you're going to get tired of threatening me.
"Not likely" He responded to my thought.
"Alice is right Edward. You're going to have to get over it. Our little girl is not so little, she's a young woman" Bella rubbed his arms.
"I think that fact became apparent when she came into ownership of breasts" Blondie commented. Edward let out a growl.
"Ok, but if I come back and she is in less than the perfect condition that I left her in, you will be running with three legs. Do you understand that, mongrel?" Edward said
"Yea yea, I hear ya" I had no patience for his over protective, fatherly threats.
"I like how you all are talking about me like I'm not here" Nessie joked half heartedly. I kissed the top of her head.
"We love you" Bella smiled.
"Do you still have that pepper spray your grandpa Charlie gave you?" Edward asked.
"Be nice" Ness gave Edward a stern look and he pretended to draw a halo around his head. "I doubt that would even work on Jacob if I needed it"
"Wouldn't hurt to try" Edward pulled her into a hug.
"Am I really that bad?" I asked out loud to myself.
"Of course not Jake, You know how Edward is" Bella kissed my cheek, scrunching up her nose at my smell. I did the same to her. Blech .She smelled too sweet and icy, it burned my nose. Nessie smelled nothing like that to me. Her scent was floral with a hint of strawberries.
"Just because I can't see you two, doesn't mean I don't know what you're up to" Alice tapped her either side of her head with her fingers.
"We'll be one our best behavior" Ness was putting on an I'm so cute and innocent face.
"Mmmhmm"The pixie replied. We said our goodbyes and Edward continued to threaten me, while Bella continued to defend me. We waved as we watched their cars fade into the distance.
"What now?" Ness asked, looking at me.
"Fun"