Okay, I know it's been awhile but I've been really busy. It's a sad story and it's a sad chapter. If you don't like it, don't read it. I do not own anything!
I don't know how this has happened. I just... I don't know what to do anymore. You know? They forced me back upstairs into my hospital room and wouldn't even give me the chance to say hello to Ari... Well, in their defense, she was asleep. Ugh. Whats gonna happen to him? As if on cue, Austin's doctor walks in and i sit up straighter in my hospital bed. "How is he?" I ask him and he sighs, giving me a look. "Well, he's alive and he's actually awake. He's asking for you." I gasp and nod, trying to get out of bed as quickly as I can. "Ally... He's paralyzed." I freeze in shock. "His waist down. It will most likely not be forever. Probably a couple of months but we can't be sure... I'm sorry... It was the only way we could keep him alive. If he has another one today... I don't think a miracle could save him." The doctor tells me and a tear comes from my eye, running down my cheek. "How is he taking it?" I ask the doctor and he shrugs. "He doesn't seem phased by it actually. I don't think that it has been fully comprehended in his brain yet." I nod, agreeing. There is no way Austin is so calm about never being able to walk, run or dance again.
The doctor helps me into a wheelchair and brings me down the elevator to Austin and Ari's floor. He pushes me to Austin's room and when I go inside, he doesn't even look up. He's looking down at his hands and I hear him sigh. "Whoever it is, please leave." He says calmly. I sigh, pushing myself over to his bed. "Austin..." I say with tears in my voice and he looks up, tears flowing down his cheeks as well. "Ally, I'm so sorry. For everything. I can't believe that this happened. Y-you shouldn't have to take care of m-" I stop him. "Austin please..." He shakes his head. "Let me finish, okay?" I nod at him. "You shouldn't have to take care of me and-and if I can't even walk, there's no way I can do everything myself and I can't ask you to do any of this for me so I need to leave. I'll stay in the apartment by myself and then you and Ari can move to Long Island with Dez and Trish. It's better there anyway and I dont want to live near them anyway. I know this isn't the first thing you want to hear but... Please do this for me. Please Ally..." He gets everything in a matter of one breath, sobbing as soon as he gets everything out. "I'm not leaving you Austin. I know you don't want to be a burden on me but I can't do everything alone... I can't raise two kids alone, I can't be alone. I want to get married. I love you. More than anything. Please..." He sighs, shutting his eyes. Hey, at least it is civilized right now. Right?
"I'm going to go see Ariana if you would like to see her..." I say, changing the subject. "I have no way to get out of the bed." I go over to help him out of the bed and into a wheelchair. Well... The best I can, being in a wheelchair myself and all. Once he's finally in, I smile at him. "That wasn't too bad Austin..." He shrugs, sighing and rolling to the door. He reaches for the knob and groans when he has to completely adjust the chair to reach it. When he finally gets it, he opens the door and tries to hold it open the best he can, giving me a sad look when he can barely keep it open without getting in my way. We both stroll to Ari's room and when we get there, Trish, Dez, and their kids are in there. Ari looks up when she hears the door and screeches when she sees me. "Mom! Oh my gosh mom..." She says, then covers her eyes with her small little hands. "I'm... I can't..." She whispers, sobbing into her hands. "Mom I missed you so much!" She yells and I roll over to her bed. "Honey, relax... Please stop crying so I can give you a hug." I tell her and she laughs, removing her hands off her face. I reach over her bed and pull her into a hug. She hugs me back for a second before yelping out in pain. "Oh gosh Ar, I'm so sorry. I forgot..." She shakes her head and smiles at me. "It's okay, don't worry..." She whispers, putting her down. It seems as if she's almost embarrassed.
"Dad. Leave." She says and I look at her in confusion, turning around to look at him but I find him staring at her. "I thought we talked about this Ar, I told you that I was sorry and I know I shouldn't have done that but I-" she cuts him off and I watch his eyes as it happens. "I never want to see, or speak to you ever again." She says and his eyes close for a second, the shakes happening quickly after. "Austin no. Please no." I shut my eyes, tears still flowing freely. I hear the commotion of Dez and Trish getting a doctor but I know that there's no use. This is really it. I hear Ari in the background, asking Trish what's happening but she doesn't know how to answer. "Is he okay? Aunt Trish, what's going on?" I hear the doctor sigh and I hear Dez make a sound. "No! Austin please!" He starts to scream but I can't bring myself to open my eyes. In the back I hear Trish's sobs and the kids questioning her. I shake my head, tears falling from my face and onto my hand. My eyes pop open and I stare at where Austin sat a few minutes ago. The doctors must have taken him out of the room. Whether it was to try to help him or to bring the dead body from the room, I'm not really sure but there isn't really any difference. I know that already. "Mom. What's happening?" Ari whispers to me and I take a deep breath, turning my chair all the way around to face her. "He's gone Ar." I tell her and I clench my jaw, watching her expression change as it comes into realization. Her eyes close like mine did and she takes a deep breath before her sobs fill the room. "Can everyone please leave the room?" she asks us, in between her sobs. I nod, quickly turning from her and everyone else, rolling as fast as I could away so I could have my space. I need to cry, I need to scream and I need to get my hands on a knife as soon as possible. I can't even think about anyone or anything else right now.
"Wait... He's okay?" I ask the doctor and he nods, pulling so much pain off my chest. "We're honestly very surprised that he did. Even though I am a doctor, I believe that everything happens for a reason. His body should have shut down but something up there is keeping him here. There's a reason that he didn't die. Tell him that..." He says and I nod, smiling. I get up, not in a wheel chair because they said I could walk around now. I almost run to his room and see his eyes staring at the ceiling. I walk in, smiling at him and he looks up. He doesn't even make an effort to smile at me. I frown at his reaction and he sighs, looking back toward the wall. "I never wanted this for myself..." He starts and he shakes is head, looking down at his hands. "What ever happened to living my dream? I was living it not so long ago even if it feels like its been forever..." He looks up and meets my eyes. "Being a rockstar, living in New York, having a family... It seems like its the perfect setting. The perfect life. It should be. But how could anything even be okay when it involves me? Yeah, maybe I knew there would be bumps in the road, when wouldn't there be? But who would've thought that I would've ended up paralyzed with a fiancé he'll never marry, a suicidal three year old daughter and a not even one year old son who has gone through probably four suicide attempts in the family already? I still don't understand how you picked me. How you agreed to marry me or why you have kids with me or why you're even with me. Why Ally..." I let him finish his rant and I sigh, walking over to him slowly and sit on the edge of his bed. "Because I love you Austin. I really do. It doesn't matter to me if you can't walk. It really doesn't and I don't know why you think it would..." He shifts in his bed a little and turn to see him crying. "We can't ever have sex again. You're going to get bored of me easily." I sigh, laughing a little. "Hey, it's not like I would want to go have sex with someone else! And besides, we don't have sex very often..." He still has the frown on his face despite my efforts to lighten the mood."I will never be able to give you another child Ally... I'm so* sorry..." He whispers and I freeze at the realization. But then think about it. "Do you really want three kids Austin? I think that two kids and two parents make a perfect family. I don't want another kid, I'm perfectly okay with two." Groaning, he turns to the doctor as he walks in. "You're very lucky Mr. Moon." He says and Austin almost laughs at him. "So lucky." He says sarcastically and I try grabbing his hand but he pulls away.
"While we did some testing, we found a few things that we weren't sure about so I must question you. If you answer, you are able to leabe and go home by tonight." He shrugs and tells him he'd answer whatever. "So in our records, it says that you smoke. When is the last time y-" the doctor is cut short when Austin interrupts him. "Um maybe we should do this later." Is all he says and I look at him. He refuses to make eye contact with me. "I need the answers now, I'm sorry. Can we please continue?" I see Austin gulp but nod at the doctor. "So when is the last time you smoked a cigarette?" He asks and he thinks for a moment. "I don't remember exactly but I've been in the hospital for awhile so probably last week." He tells the doctor and the doctor writes something down, nodding. "And when did you start smoking?" he asks and he shrugs. "I smoked a couple of years ago but I only did it for about a week because then I was put into rehab. Recently, it was two months ago." the doctor nods again and Austin looks at the paper, shaking his head as the doctor. He begins to speak to me before the doctor has the chance to ask another question. "Ally, will you please leave? I'm sorry... I just..." I sigh and look at him. "Are you really doing this right now? Austin I thought you trusted me..." I whisper to him and he grabs my hand. "I trust you Ally. I just don't want you to be mad at me... You're going to hate me." He whispers back and I shake my head, telling him I could never hate him. He tells the doctor he could continue asking him the questions. "When did you begin abusing alcohol? And how many times have you had your stomach pumped?" He asks and Austin sighs, running his fingers through is long hair. "A long time ago. It's probably been about two years now. And probably four." I glare at him. "You've been drinking for two years?! Really Austin? And the smoking. What are you, a drug addict?" I ask him. I wasn't really being serious about the drug addict thing, I was just surprised. I'll help him stop though... I will. "Yes Ally! I am a f*cking drug addict! Why do you think I f*cking hate hospitals?!" He yells and the both of us freeze. "Ally. Leave. He'll let you in when he's done. Then we can talk." Austin tells me sternly and I laugh at him. "Yeah right. I need to know what you're doing."
Austin rolls his eyes at me and I roll mine at him. I begin to write in my book, which Austin had brought either to carry around or to give to me when I woke up. I just need to rant.
You would not believe what I just found out. Austin is addicted to alcohol.. It's been two years. I don't even understand how I never noticed. We'll talk about it later. I can't believe he's an alcoholic... I've never even smelt it on him or anything! I
The doctor interrupts my thoughts when he asks a question that I never even thought relevant. "When did you start doing heroine?" He asks and I freeze, dropping the book as I look at Austin. "Two weeks ago..." He whispers and I shake my head. Tears slip from my eyes as I look at his face. That's why he looks so much worse. "Oh God no Austin. Please. Please don't do this to yourself! Oh my God please..." I say, trying to get him to stop. "Ally. Please stop." He says and I can tell he's trying not to cry. "When's the last time you did it?" The doctor asks and he takes a deep breath. "Last week." His voice strains and he looks up from his hands at the doctor. "The seizures. It's not just from when you stabbed your temples, it's from the withdrawal." What?! Stab his temples?! I'm so lost. I don't know about anything. "It hurts so much. Is there anything you could possibly do to help me?" Austin pleads and the doctor sighs. "I can help you but you need a prescription. That would be ready in a day or two."
"I can't last that long. It hurts so badly..." He says and he groans. "Please finish the questions." He changes the subject as I continue to cry. I can't believe that he would do that. "When did you start ecstasy?" He asks and a sob comes from my throat. I think I'm going to be sick. "Two weeks ago. Last time I did it was sometime last week." The doctor writes that down. "Is it the same for weed and meth?" He asks Austin and he nods. "Any other drugs we should know about?" The doctor asks and Austin shrugs. "Well, I smoke an e-cig. That was about two months ago. Other than that, no." The doctor nods, thanking us and getting up to leave. "Ally, before you yell at me. Can you please grab me that bag?" He asks me and I clench my teeth but go get it anyway. When I hand it to him, he looks in and sighs. Closing it, he looks back up at me. "I'll be right back." He says, pulling his wheelchair closer to his bed. "Austin. What's in that bag?" I ask and he shrugs. I grab it and place it on the floor next to me. "Um nothing, I'm just gonna go to the bathroom... Can I have the bag back?" He asks and I feel a tear slip from my eyes. "Hey, what's wrong...?" he asks me and I shake my head. "I know that you're f*cking going in there to do heroine Austin!" I burst and he shakes his head. "Who said that? Maybe I just have to pee!" He yells at me, continuing the lies. I continue to sob as I speak even hough I'm mad at him. "Oh yeah? And how do you plan on doing that? You're paralyzed!" I yell at him like he had yelled at me. He leans his head back on the bed and sighs. "I'm sorry I lied and I'm sorry that I yelled at you... I just, I need it Ally... Please... You don't understand how much it hurts... How much I actually need t..." I groan and shake my head. "You're not going into that bathroom Austin but here. I'll put it where you know I'm not touching anything." I say as I place it on the chair next to me.
He bites his lip and grabs the bag, looking inside again. He looks up at me. I can see the pain in his eyes... I feel so bad... But happens next goes to quickly for me to do anything about it. He reaches into the bad and takes out a pill bottle. He takes one and smashes it in his hand. He reaches his hand up to his face and quickly snorts it. He sighs, leaning back in relief. "Austin! Give me this f*cking bag you a**hole!" I yell at him and I reach over trying to grab it but he pulls it away from me. I smack his arms and his head, trying to get him to let go of the bag. "Ally are you f*cking kidding?! Are you f*cking kidding me right now?! You're f*cking beating me! You're f*cking abusing me!" He starts screaming and cursing nonsense and he starts to sob. "No matter what you've done to me I would never hit you! Ever!" He yells and I start to feel horrible. "Why are you here?! Why are you f*cking here?!" He yells at me and I try to stop him but there's no use. "Look at me! I'm a f*cking depressed, suicidal, paralyzed drug addict a**hole! Hit me! Hit me again! Please Ally! I deserve it! I f*cking deserve it! I'm worthless!" He won't stop screaming and I try telling him to stop. He rips the pills put of the bag and is trying to open the bottle but his hands are shaking too much. "Ally! Open the bottle! Please! Please open the bottle! Please f*cking open it!" He scrams, finally breaking down and he closes his eyes. By now the two of us are sobbing. "I will only open this bottle if I get to have some." I tell him through my tears and I see his eyes pop open in anger. "Is this a joke to you?! You can't f*cking do this to yourself. Look at me. Do you want to end up like me Ally?!" He asks and I sigh. "Austin, I'm going to get the doctor and he will help you out okay?" I say and he nods, sighing and handing me the bag.
I get the doctor and explain everything that just happened to him. I told him to make sure that he's not alone and that he's okay. I think he's going to just stay with him for a little so he can relax and the heroine can come from his system. He'll be out within an hour. I kiss his forehead before I leave the room to find Dez and Trish. I had already talked to the and Ari, explaining that he was okay. Ari was very relieved. She cried one hundred apologies to me and I told her that she just has to watch herself her father.
"Did you or Trish know about any of this?" I ask Dez and he looks at me in confusion. He sees my tears and wait patiently for me to catch my breath. "He's a drug addict." I tell him and he gives me a look. "Alright jokes over. How is he?" I sigh and squeeze my eyes shut. "He's actually a drug addict Dez... The doctor had come in and started questioning him and he had no choice but to tell the truth." I tell him and he groans. "Like... what's he doing?" He asks and I motion for him to sit. "There's kind of a long list so please let me finish before saying anything..." He nods, motioning for me to continue. "Alright well... He's been drinking for two years now. I didn't know this until today. The doctor said it was alcohol abuse. He's had his stomach pumped four times. He started the rest around two weeks ago besides smoking. He started smoking regular cigarettes and an e-cig about two months ago. Two weeks ago... He started weed, meth, ecstasy and heroine..." I finish in a whisper and I can tell that he's in shock. "Wait wait wait... Austin does... Heroine..." I nod, holding back a sob. "Oh God, that's why he looks so..." I nod. "I know, he's going through withdrawal and snorted a pill right in front of me. He started screaming at me... I've never seen him like that." He shakes his head. "He needs some serious help Ally and you're the only one who can help him." I nod and sigh. "Ari can come home now so should we take her back to our hotel or something? I just wanna try to help you guys out." I smile. "Thank you but there's no reason for it. Austin is coming home tonight as well so all of us will be coming home. He should be coming through that door any minute now." As if on cue, he rolls out of his room with his bag on the back of the chair .
"Hey, Ari is just being released as well so we can all go home as a family. For the first time ever! We shouuld take a picture! Dez, will you take it?" I say and he nods. Trish walks out of Ari's room holding Austin in one hand and holding Ari's hand with the other. They said that it has to air out so she has this bandeau kind of thing on with her cut showing. Ari goes and hugs Austin. He lifts her up and sets her on his lap. I take little Austin and hold him in my arms. He's very small for his age. I think he's only about six pounds. His skin is a little gray but the doctors said that it's normal because of the way he was born. The four of us stand with each other and pose for the picture. When he snaps it, I take my phone back and look at it. Wow... Little Austin is too small and gray, I'm paler than usual and have a bandage around my head and Ari has her cut on her stomach and her cheeks have hollowed out a bit from before the accident. And then there's Austin. He's much skinner than before, his eyes are black and have dark rings underneath. He's in his wheel chair and he doesn't even smile, all he did was stare at the camera.
"Are you ready to go home?" Ari nods enthusiastically and I laugh, ruffling her hair. "Dad, you ready?" She asks him and he nods a little, using one arm to hold her on his lap and using the other to turn the chair around toward the exit. I sigh as I look over at Dez and Trish. "I'm sorry he's like this guys..." Dez shakes his head and kisses my cheek. "It's my fault. I was a horrible person to him and I deserve it..." I try to protest but he insists because I don't know what happened. "So, I guess we'll come and visit sometime..." I say and they both pull me in for a hug. "I'm glad you're all okay... Well, I'm glad you're okay and I want you to know whenever you need us, don't hesitate to call, okay? I love you Ally..." Trish says and I smile. "I love you too Trish, I'll miss you guys." I say as I begin to walk away. "Us too." I smile at them one last time before I get to our car. Ari and Little Austin are in their carseats and I see Austin trying to lift himself into the passenger side of the car but when he gets frustrated he groans, smashing his head onto the side. I jog over to him quickly and I smile. "Hey, I got it. Ready?" I ask as I grab his hands and he nods. "One, two... Three!" I say and lift his arms. He plops into the seat with a little 'umph' which makes me giggle. He smiles up at me for the first time since I woke up and it makes me smile even wider. I jog over to the drivers side and hop in. "Hey, we're gonna be okay..." I whisper, grabbing his hand. He lifts mine up to his lips and kisses it. When he pulls it away, he gives me that slight smile again. "I know we will." He says. That gave me hope.
I hope you guys liked it, review to let me know!