A/N: A long delay between posts, I know and my only excuse? The sun came out. What can I say? When you live in England, you have to take full advantage of every moment! :-D Not the happiest of chapters, I'm afraid, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.

o-xxx-o

Jack had absented himself almost immediately, explaining that he needed to sort out the bags and stash the presents somewhere Jilly wouldn't find them but despite Bobby's assurances that his mood had nothing to do with finding them there, Sue still felt uncomfortable about staying. Lying back, she allowed the warm water to soothe her, closing her eyes and breathing in the scent of her favourite bath foam as she contemplated her next move. As luck would have it, most of their things were still packed, so in the morning, all she had to do was add the last few bits and pieces; arrange for a ride into town and go back to her rented accommodation. It was something she should have done a week ago. The danger was long past and they'd already taken too much advantage of his generosity. It was clear to her now that he'd only asked them to stay because of Jilly but there was a problem, a very big one… she was worried about him. He needed help, that was obvious, but if he wouldn't talk to her then what good could she do by staying?

Sighing, she reluctantly stood and dried herself before putting on a pair of silky, pale blue pyjamas and climbing into bed. Her dreams were haunted by Jack's face, both as it was now, and the way she'd always remembered it… The laughter, the fun, the sparkle in those beautiful, expressive, brown eyes, the cheeky grin… She felt a sudden need to check on him and make sure he was okay but when she looked at the clock it was just past 4am and way too late to think of disturbing him. Knowing that she wasn't likely to get back to sleep any time soon, she decided to go to the kitchen and make herself hot drink but took a detour to check on the girls first. She was surprised to see that Jack's light was still on, the faint glow that escaped under his door illuminating the hall carpet. A tug on her sleeve startled her and she looked down to see a sleepy and tearful Jilly standing beside her. Taking her hand, she led her back to the guest room where they could talk.

"What's wrong, honey?"

"My daddy…"

"What about him?"

As she spoke silent tears trickled down her face. "If he doesn't go to sleep, will he get sick again?"

Giving her a sympathetic smile, Sue lifted her onto her lap. "Maybe, he's just not tired."

"He's always tired and sad... I want to make him laugh again and be happy but I don't know how." She sniffled and wiped her face with her hand. "Will you help me?"

"Jilly, I…"

"Pleease…"

"I'm not sure I can, sweetheart." As she watched the little girl's face got even sadder. "But I bet you could…"

"How..?"

"By being you…"

"I don't understand."

"Well, he loves you very much, right?"

"Yes."

"So show him you love him right back. When he's sad, give him an extra special hug and a kiss. Ask him to help you colour a picture… You had fun doing that when he wasn't feeling well and it made him feel better then, didn't it?"

"Mmm…"

"I know, since its Christmas, why don't you make him a card? He'll love that."

"Really..?"

"Of course he will."

"Okay," she yawned and rubbed her eyes. "Will you show me how?"

"In the morning... Now, you're going back to bed..."

"But…"

"Bed…"

"'kay…"

Sue carried her back to her room and bent over to tuck her in. "Good night. Sweet dreams."

The nightlight wasn't very bright but it was enough to read the youngster's lips by.

"Night, Sue. Love you."

Her eyes filled and she sniffled. "I love you too."

"And, my daddy..?"

"Jilly…"

"He needs someone to love him, Auntie Allie said so. I heard her talking to Grandma."

"Go to sleep, sweetheart."

She snuggled down in the bed. "I wish my mommy was here."

"You miss her very much, don't you?"

"Mmm hmm…" She nodded, putting her thumb in her mouth for comfort.

Leaning over, Sue kissed the girl on the forehead and quickly checked on Laura who was sleeping soundly. She noticed Jack's door was slightly open, whereas before it had been closed, but as she emerged from the children's room it was pushed shut again and the light went out

o-xxx-o

It was gone 8am when Sue got up the next morning, she'd fallen back to sleep quite easily in the end but had been surprised that Laura hadn't been in to wake her as she usually did. Walking into the kitchen she was greeted by the sight of her daughter sitting at the table eating her cereal and although Jilly and Jack were nowhere to be seen, there was a pile of clean laundry stacked neatly on top of the dryer and the washing machine was midway through a cycle.

"Good morning sweetie, why didn't you wake me up?"

"Jack told me not to. He made my bweakfast."

"That was good of him. Where is he?"

She pointed to the garden with her spoon and Sue crossed to the window to look outside, smiling when she saw him filling the bird feeders. Stepping back to admire his handiwork, he signed a 'good morning' when he saw her watching and bent down to retrieve the bags of seed and peanuts from the lawn.

One look at his face when he came back inside and her heart went out to him. It was pale and drawn and his eyes were dull with the same haunted quality she'd seen after his nightmare. Turning away, she busied herself with a glass of juice, so he wouldn't see how upset she was.

"For someone who isn't a morning person, you've been busy. How long have you been up?"

Jack glanced at the clock, "A couple of hours, maybe."

By her reckoning, that meant he couldn't have had more than an hour's sleep but looking at him, she suspected even that was an over-estimate. Pulling out a chair she sat down, taking a sip of her drink as she tried to figure out the best way to tell him about her conversation with his daughter.

"Jilly and I had a bit of a late night chat…"

He sank down onto the nearest seat. "I know…"

"How much did you hear?"

"Most of the stuff in the bedroom... I didn't mean to eavesdrop, I heard noises and…"

"She's worried about you."

"I know that too, I just… Look, I'm really sorry about yesterday, I behaved badly. You and Laura are more than welcome to spend Christmas, if you still want to, that is? Although, I wouldn't blame you if wanted to get as far away from me as possible…"

"Sue, you're up," Jilly came running in before she could answer. "Don't forget you promised to help me today."

"Help you with what, JillyBean?"

"It's a secret, Daddy. It's for me and Sue."

"Really?" he managed a faint smile as he lifted her onto his knee. "We'll I'm afraid whatever it is will have to wait until later."

"Why?"

"Because, we need to go shopping... We have to buy a tree for indoors, decorations, food..."

"Presents?" she asked hopefully.

"Oh, I'm not so sure about that. Don't you think you have enough already?"

"No, you can never have too many presents, can you Laura?"

The little girl shook her head.

"Uh-huh, I smell a conspiracy… And, I have to pick up the mail."

"Are Sue and Laura coming with us?"

"We'd love to, if it's okay?"

"Daddy..?"

Jack nodded.

"I'll get my coat." She jumped off his lap and ran to the door.

"We're not leaving right away sweetheart, I have to figure out what we need first."

"'kay. Are Sue and Laura staying for Christmas?"

"Sue?" He asked hopefully.

Almost shyly, she took his hand and squeezed it. "We're staying."

"Yeah, it's going to be the best Christmas ever!"

o-xxx-o

To try and make it less boring for the kids, they'd split the day into sections. Jack had made his stop first and then they'd gone tree shopping. Even though they'd left it until the last minute, there had still been plenty to choose from and eventually they'd settled on one they all liked and arranged for it to be delivered the following afternoon. The decorations had come next, then the food, and finally they'd headed to the mall, stopping for something to eat before moving on to the more personal items. Jack had left Jilly and Laura with Sue while he did his present shopping and then taken over child-minding duty so that she could do the same. There had been so many 'kodak' moments during their expedition but one in particular had touched Sue deeply and it had her smiling as she put away their purchases in the kitchen cupboards.

When Jilly had managed to get a moment with her alone, she'd asked for her help to find something nice to buy her daddy and she'd wanted to get some glitter and glue for the card she was making. She'd given him some feeble excuse about needing to use the little girls' room and he'd offered to watch Laura while they were gone. She had to admit now she hadn't been sure it was a good idea because she didn't know how her daughter would react but catching sight of them together had stolen her breath away.

She'd seen him with his guard down often enough indoors as he played on the floor with Jilly but outside in public she'd expected him to behave more like the macho F.B.I. Agent who, when they'd been out on an assignment together, had almost died of embarrassment when she'd unthinkingly handed him her purse in the middle of the street while she answered a call. Yet there he'd been, pushing Laura along in her stroller so that she could look at all the things on the shelves and when she'd accidentally dropped Piglet, he'd crouched down to hand the toy back, teasing her with it and making her giggle happily. It wasn't until he'd straightened up again, painstakingly slowly and wearily, that she'd remembered how little sleep he'd had the night before. How he'd still been standing was a complete mystery to her.

Jack stood mesmerised in the doorway as he watched her face, not wanting to intrude on the thoughts that were giving her so much pleasure, but when her smile faded, he made his presence known, touching her arm gently to gain her attention.

"Need a hand, here?"

"Sorry?"

"I asked if you needed a hand."

"All done, except for those," she pointed towards the bags on the table that held the decorations and other paraphernalia. "I wasn't sure which ones you wanted to do yourself."

"Let's have a look, shall we?" Picking them up, he carried them into the living room. "Where are the kids?"

"Taking a nap…."

"Good idea."

"Maybe you should think about doing the same," Sue suggested taking in his pallor and the slump of his shoulders.

"I'm okay."

"You've hardly slept in the past thirty-six hours, you must be exhausted. I'm surprised you're still on your feet."

"Lots of practice," he sighed sadly.

"Jack…"

"Can you sort through this one, please?"

"Sure…" Shaking her head she took it from him, frustrated that yet again, when the conversation had taken a more personal turn, he'd swiftly closed it down.

The contents of the bag he'd given her consisted mainly of tissue paper, ribbon and other assorted wrapping materials but towards the bottom she found the mail he'd picked up earlier. Putting all the envelopes to one side she took out a cube-shaped package which weighed practically nothing and had fragile stickers on it.

"What should I do with this?"

Taking it from her, he looked at the return address. "It's Allie's writing."

"Maybe it's a Christmas present."

"I thought I brought them all back with me."

Finding another envelope she added it to the pile while he opened it and took out a piece of paper but when she looked up, she was shocked to see his face had grown even paler.

He quickly stuffed the note into his pocket and took out what appeared to be a Christmas bauble from the box. At first it just looked to be a standard tree ornament, designed to represent a snowball and covered with glitter to catch the light but as he turned it she could see it had something printed on it.

"Jack..?"

He remained silent for a few moments and then looked up at her, his expression giving nothing away, but his hand trembled as he passed it to her. "It's for Jilly… from Lisa."

Taking it from him, she carefully turned it around until she found what she was looking for; the image was a close-up of mother and daughter, cheek-to-cheek as they smiled for the camera. "What a wonderful gift, it's beautiful…"

"Yes it is." His voice was choked as he spoke but Sue didn't pick anything up from his face so she decided to broach something that had been bothering her.

"Jack…"

"Mmm…"

She touched his arm to get him to look at her. "Jack…"

"Sorry, I..." he broke off waiting for her to speak.

"Maybe you should invite her over?"

"I can't do that."

"Why not, Jack? It is Christmas and Jilly misses her so much. I'm sure whatever problems the two of you have could be put aside for a couple of hours. It would mean an awful lot to her…"

He closed his eyes momentarily and when he opened them she was shocked to see both hurt and a hint of anger in their depths. "You really think I'd be cruel enough to deliberately keep them apart? I'd move Heaven and earth to make that little girl happy, if I could."

"Jack, I didn't mean…" she reached out to him but he pulled away and when he looked at her again, there was nothing left in his expression but abject misery.

"I can't. Not this Christmas, next Christmas or any other for that matter… Lisa's gone, Sue. She…" he hesitated for just an instant "…died."

Sue stared at him aghast, her eyes filling with tears. "Oh Jack, I'm so sorry, I didn't know… If I had…"

"It's okay," he whispered sadly, regretting that he'd reacted a little too harshly. "Very few people do."

"Then, why..?"

"Not now…" swallowing several times, he dragged a hand down his face and walked to the door. "Take care of Jilly for me and please, don't tell her anything about this," he raised the box so she could see.

"Of course, I won't."

"Thank you." He held her gaze for a few moments longer then turned away.

o-xxx-o