Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story are those from the Fifty Shades Trilogy. They remain the rightful property of E L James. Recognisable brands, places, music or films remain the property of their owners. No copyright infringement is intended.
LA – Thank you, my dear! I'm glad you liked the update. :) Hm, it'd be interesting if somehow Morton managed to link up with Elena and Linc but, honestly, I don't think he's that good. The guy's kind of an idiot! And I hope José will live up to expectations! Hope you like this chapter. And I hope all it well on your side of the pond! Much Love x
SuzB – Thank you! :) I think Ana has learned from past mistakes (in some ways) so I'm sure she'll seek help when she needs it. As for José, all is revealed below! I hope you like this chapter, my dear! Much Love x
Dseiladmnd – Thank you! Really glad you liked it. :) I hope José isn't involved, either. That'd be beyond cruel, right? Hope you like this chapter! Much Love x
Hi Everyone!
I'm really glad so many of you enjoyed the last chapter and it was worth the wait for several of you. That's always reassuring and brilliant to hear! So thank you very much! :)
I hope you like this chapter, and that it reaches you in good spirits!
Much Love and See you soon!
Chelsea x
I stripped off my night clothes on my way to the bathroom, following the sound of the shower. I pushed the door to a quiet close, not wanting to alarm Christian. He's stood in the centre of the frosted glass cubicle, arching his neck back as he shuffles further under the water. He groaned a familiar, throaty noise.
Cranking open the door, I slipped into the cubicle and tiptoed over to him. I waited a moment before slowly placing my hands on his shoulders, my lips pressing a kiss to the centre of his spine.
"Good morning," I kissed him again. He jerked his head to the side, glancing at me through the corner of his eye. I saw a smile spread over his lips. "I thought we could save water and shower together."
He turned and took hold of my hands, moving them to rest on his sides, out of his way. He slid his fingers over my arms and tugged me forward, into his chest. Taking a step back, he pulled me under the shower head.
"How did you sleep?" he asked, his hands starting to work into my skin.
"Much better once you were next to me," I told him, tilting my chin up and puckering my lips for a kiss. I smirked as he rewarded me with one. "Thank you."
"You're welcome."
"For last night, I mean," I moved my hands up to his chest, resting my fingers over his scars. "For not… you know…"
I didn't really want to say it out loud. It's odd to thank your husband for not having sex with you – for only taking things so far before pulling me into his chest for a warm embrace.
He shook his head and lowered himself, bringing his lips to my forehead. He didn't say anything. He kissed between my brows and pressed his forehead to mine, holding my gaze. The reassurance in his eyes comforted me and brought a giggle to my lips.
"I'm going to be late home this evening," he finally spoke, resuming his dedication to wash every inch of my body. "I've been asked to attend a dinner with the head of a telecommunications company from Amsterdam… If you'd rather I cancel –"
"No, it's fine," I shook my head and smiled. "Have fun. I might have an early night. I've got a busy day planned."
"You have?"
I nodded. "Yeah, well, sort of… I've got a busy morning. I'm going to grab some breakfast and meet up with a friend."
"Oh, good," he smiled and took a step back. He allowed me to wash my own hair, knowing how I prefer to do it myself. "Have you asked –"
"Have I asked Bailey to accompany me?" I arched my brow, knowing what he was about to say. He's so predictable at times. Which is why elaborating on this subject is going to be difficult. "Yes. I messaged her this morning… I get it, Christian. I understand that I need someone there. And, if I'm being completely honest, it's nice to have an extra pair of hands around. Trying to juggle doors, the stroller, the mammoth amount of crap Teddy needs… it's hard work, you know?"
Christian chuckled a laugh and rinsed the suds off his chest. "I just want to keep you safe. Now more than ever."
"I know," I smiled, watching as he stepped out of the shower and padded over to the counter opposite. He picked up a towel and rubbed it over himself, before wrapping it around his hips. He propped himself against the bathtub, where he can watch me without obstruction.
"So are you just getting breakfast or are you going shopping afterwards?" he asked.
"Just breakfast." I knocked off the water and shook the excess from my limbs and hair. I hopped out and wobbled towards Christian, accepting the towel he held out for me.
"Which friend are you meeting with?"
Here we go…
I grabbed a second towel from the counter and wrapped my hair in a makeshift turban, pretending like I didn't hear him. I hummed silly noises to myself and then made my way out of the bathroom, and into our closet.
"Ana," Christian followed me and came to a stop in the doorway. "Didn't you hear me? I asked which friend you're meeting with."
"Oh really…" I grabbed the first dress I came across – a simple, knee length lemon coloured number that Mia insisted I needed. "Sorry… Um, I'm meeting with José."
I held my breath and yanked open my lingerie drawer. I could feel the air between us shift and grow tense. His breaths hardened. I should have prepared for this.
I spent way too long choosing which set of bra and panties to wear, trying to bide my time before I absolutely have to look at him. I risked a glance in the mirror. His eyes were pinpoint and fixed on the back of my head. His brows were low and poised in a way that screamed 'Oh really? You think I'm going to allow that to happen?'
"José?" he asked after the longest silence. I nodded. "Hmm…"
"Is there a problem with me seeing him?" I kept my voice low. I don't want to argue with him, regardless of how much his reaction is grating on me already. He shot me a look.
Yes, there is problem. There will always be a problem because you have a vagina and José has a penis, my subconscious rolled her eyes at Christian.
"Well that depends," he shrugged at me. I turned slowly to face him.
"On what?"
"Whether or not he attempts to shove his tongue down your throat," he arched his brow and pressed his weight into the door frame, gripping it with his fingers.
I huffed. "Are we really going down this road again?"
"I don't trust him."
"You don't trust any man," I shot back, shaking my head at him. "José isn't going to attempt anything with me. I'm married. I have a baby… We have a baby! He knows that."
"He knows it, but whether he decides to respect that is another story," he continued. "He forced himself on you before. There's nothing stopping him from doing it again."
"Beside the fact that he knows I'm not interested? I mean, it couldn't be more obvious now." I dismissed his claims. "When he tried to kiss me, we were both single. I wasn't with you. I wasn't with anyone."
"You said no and he continued –"
"And how many times have I said no to you and you've still gone behind my back and done something?" I arched my brow and folded my arms underneath my chest. He pursed his lips. "I've forgiven José for what happened. Besides, it was nothing. It meant nothing. We were drunk at the time."
"You were drunk," he tried to correct me. I shot him another stern look. His jaw clenched in response. "I don't trust him to keep his hands to himself."
"Well I do," I shrugged. I prised myself from my spot at the dresser and walked towards him. He stood in my way, refusing to move so I can pass through into the bedroom. "He's not going to try anything. Bailey will be there… and so will Teddy. I think he's going to be way more interested in the baby than me."
"You're taking him with you?" he seemed surprised at this admission.
"I was thinking about dumping him in front of the TV with a bottle of beer…" I quipped, earning myself a scowl. I ducked underneath his arm and slipped by him. I moved over to the bed and laid out my clothes. "As if I wouldn't take the baby…" I huffed under my breath.
Christian stomped around inside the closet, making his frustration known. He scraped the hangers up and down the rails, threw his towel across the room, and cursed when he jammed his finger in one of the drawers. He emerged wearing black slacks and an open white shirt. He carried his tie and jacket, throwing them down on the bed.
"I want Bailey at your side at all times," he huffed. "I don't want you alone with him for even a second."
"Can you tie this for me, please?" I held out the two ribbons of fabric that tie at the back of my dress. I stepped towards him and turned. His fingers brushed against mine as he took hold of the ties. They felt cold. "You can moan all you like, Christian, but I'm still going to meet with José today. I haven't seen him in months… He's my friend."
"I used to consider Elena my friend," he retorted. The blow hit me hard and low in the stomach, but I didn't rise to his comment. The sharp breath he inhaled said it all. One step too far… He tightened the knot and smoothed his fingers down the back of my dress, ironing out the creases.
"I'll have security with me," I added, quietly. "I won't feel guilty about this… I'm going to enjoy myself, enjoy catching up with an old friend… and hopefully I'll come away feeling a hell of a lot better than I do right this second."
He continued to dress himself while I stripped the bed sheets. Our third-base rendezvous was messy, the evidence stained into the linen. I rolled them up into a neat pile and tucked it under my arm, ready to throw it into the laundry basket downstairs.
Christian waited for me to finish with the bed before heading downstairs, taking to the stairs with me. We stood at either end of the staircase, each holding onto the banister.
"Can I ask you just one question?" he grunted as we met the ground floor.
I didn't answer him. I knew he would ask it anyway, regardless of my reply.
"Why are you seeing him all of a sudden? You haven't mentioned him for months."
Because I'm going to ask him to help us with this Stephen/Moninder/Cheating accusation bullshit… Because I need concrete proof that they're lying, just in case this information does leak to the media… Because I know he will help me… Because I trust him better than any goon you have working at GEH…
"He's in Seattle," I shrugged. I can't tell him the real reason why. Not now. I can't stomach a full-blown argument. I don't have the strength. "I spoke to him yesterday and he said he was in the city. He asked if we could meet and I said I was free this morning. I decided to take advantage of him being here."
"Right," he nodded. He didn't interrogate me further.
"Are you eating here or at your office?" I asked as we passed the kitchen.
"I'll eat at work," he shook his head. "I just need to speak with Taylor and then I'll be gone."
"I'll fetch him for you. I need to speak with Gail anyway," I lied, increasing my pace. "I'm changing Teddy's diapers. The ones we're using don't agree with him. His rash is still sore." That much is true.
"Okay," he nodded. He turned off at the hallway and headed down to his home office. He didn't question the fact that Gail is already in the house, in the family room – the room he had to pass on his way to his office. He just continued walking without a second glance.
I shoved my feet into an odd pair of shoes that I found at the front door and stepped outside, onto the driveway. The gravel crunched under the thin soles as I made my way over to Gail and Taylor's apartment. Their home is connected to ours via the laundry room, but I despise using that entrance. It feels too invasive. I'd much rather the formality of knocking on their front door and waiting for an answer. Needless to say this isn't Christian's preferred method.
After a few moments, Taylor yanked open the door and jerked his head back at the sight of me. He had one hand at his neck, still fixing his tie, and an half-eaten slice of toast sticking out of his mouth.
"Good morning," I said first, giving him a small smile.
"Morning, Ana," he grunted, pulling the toast from his mouth. He wiped frantically at his lips, trying to get rid of any crumbs. He checked his watch and then looked out behind me, to check the drive. "Is something wrong?"
"Erm –"
"Daddy, I can't find it. It's not here!"
Taylor quickly turned his back on me and stepped forward into his living room. I peered around him and saw his daughter throwing the cushions off the couch in a temper. Her little, reddened face was full of concentration. She opened her mouth to say something but was silenced as soon as her eyes met with mine. The red dissipated and a smile crawled over her mouth.
"Hi Sophie," I waved. She waved back and smiled. It's incredible how much she looks like Taylor. She's his mini me - with considerably more hair.
"It's exactly where you left it, baby," Taylor pointed to the TV stand just across from the couch. "Look, it's there."
She nodded and mumbled a quick thank you, before stomping over to retrieve the remote control.
"Is this a bad time?" I asked. I gestured behind me. "I can speak to you later, if –"
"No, it's fine," he shook his head and offered me inside. I pushed the door to a close. "Soph, turn it down a little, yeah?"
With a huff, Sophie turned down the volume and flumped back onto the couch.
The apartment is cosy, comfortable and homely. It's colourful, but not offensively so. It's tasteful. I had encouraged both Gail and Taylor to meet with Gia to discuss how they wanted the place to be decorated, but they shrugged off the help and decided to take charge of things, do everything themselves. Elliot and his team had doubled the size, adding in an additional bedroom for Sophie, but everything else is down to them. I admire them for taking on such a mammoth task, cramming their weekends with DIY and hard work. I can't imagine Christian lifting a paintbrush.
"So, is there something I can do for you?" Taylor asked, taking a seat on the edge of the couch, next to Sophie. I mirrored him and sat down on one of the caramel armchairs.
"I just wanted to let you know that I'm going out this morning," I began. He nodded back.
"Faith already called and gave me the details of where you're going."
"I'm meeting with José," I added on. I knew Bailey would have told him. They're like partners in crime.
"She did mention that," he nodded again, this time pairing it with an arched look.
"He knows. I just told him," I explained. Taylor's shoulders relaxed at the news. I know he doesn't want to be caught up in anything, least of all a domestic. "I'm sure you can imagine what his reaction was like… Look, I need –"
"You don't want him to turn up expected," he fathomed, interrupting me. I nodded. I can't have Christian there. I just can't. "I'll try to keep him away."
"Thank you. I'd really appreciate it." I smiled. "I'm going to ask José to check out the photographs Stephen Morton gave us yesterday. I need him to check whether they are photoshopped. We're going to need proof if –"
"You haven't told Christian that part, have you?" his face tensed. I gulped and shook my head. He closed his eyes and sucked in a sharp breath.
"I was going to tell him but then he got in a mood about me just meeting with José for breakfast," I defended my actions. "I hate arguing with him and it always turns into an argument. I can't handle it."
"He's going to flip," he shook his head. I knew what he was thinking. He's going to flip and I'll be the one who gets it in the neck!
"I will tell him. I just need to get him in a good mood first. If I tell him when he's like this, he's gonna go nuclear… I will tell him. Later, maybe, when he's back from work," I shrugged, the uneasiness in my voice starting to creep through. "I wanted you to know. If I can't tell him, you're –"
"I understand," he nodded. "What do you need me to do?"
"A couple things," I pulled a face, feeling guilty. I offered him the small scrap of paper I'd be carrying since I left my bedroom. "I need you to check this number for me. It's on Moninder's phone records. They're making out it's Christian's, but I need to know who the phone's actually registered to."
"This isn't any of the numbers he uses," Taylor confirmed. But I already knew that. "I can find out who's using it. No problem." He folded the paper and dropped it into the breast pocket of his shirt.
"I also need you to organise for a detail to follow José around, while he's working on the pictures," I licked my lips, nervously. "I need to know who he's talking to, what he's doing, where he's going… He said he's been here for a few months, but he hasn't contacted me once. And Kate hasn't mentioned him. I don't want to think the worst, but it seems too weird."
"Okay, I'll get Welch on it."
"No, not Welch," I shook my head. "Please, don't get anyone from GEH involved."
"Okay," he nodded. No questions asked. He's worked for Christian for a long time. He's learned not to ask questions.
I explained anyway. "I don't want to risk anything. Stephen plays dirty. He could have someone on the inside."
"GEH is locked tight, Ana. Since that shit with the Lincoln's, we upped our game," he lowered his voice, shielding Sophie from our discussion. "We have kept the number of people working on this low, as a precaution. I trust the team. None of them are moles."
I wished I could believe him.
I sat up and breathed deeply. "I called ahead to the restaurant. They've cleared a lot of the tables for me… Bailey will be with me and José. I've got Sawyer, Ryan and Reynolds coming along, too. They'll each be sitting at different tables, keeping an eye on who's around. I asked them to dress down, so José won't suspect anything."
"I'm impressed," Taylor smirked. "You're sounding a lot like Christian. He's rubbing off on you."
"Or maybe I'm just finally listening to him?" I shrugged, forcing a smile. I lifted myself off the chair and smoothed down my dress. "He's in a really bad mood. I'm sorry if he snaps at you today."
"I don't even notice it anymore," he brushed it off and climbed to his feet. He walked me over to the door and hesitated. "Can you tell Christian I'll be a minute? I just need to sort Sophie out. Gail's going to come back and forth to check on her."
"Why doesn't Sophie just come into the house?" I suggested. I could see Sophie's ear prickle at the mention of her name. I gazed at her. "Hey, Sophie, do you want to come into the big house? You can bring over all of your games… Christian's brother has a PlayStation, too –" I smiled, noticing the console on the floor in front of the television stand. "You can play your games on the big screen."
"Can I, Dad?" she grinned, seeking Taylor's approval. He nodded, giving in to her. "Thanks, Ana!"
"Mrs Grey," Taylor corrected her. She frowned and mumbled it back to me.
"You can call me Ana, sweetie," I winked.
I passed another smile and thank you to Taylor and exited his apartment. I heard shuffling and saw Christian charging over to his R8, unlocking and jumping into it. I rushed forward a step and he looked up at me, through the tinted windscreen. His lips curled slightly and then he was gone. He reversed and sped off down the driveway, leaving Taylor to follow in a separate car.
"Is there anything else I can do for you, Mrs Grey?"
"No, I'm fine, thank you," I dismissed the manager of the restaurant with a smile. He had been hovering at my side since I arrived thirty minutes ago, making sure his 'star customer' was happy at all times.
It's not really a restaurant. It's more of a bistro, than anything. It's a quiet place just a few blocks from Grey Publishing. I came here maybe once or twice with Mark. It's a nice enough place to meet. Not too flashy. Not too busy.
I lined the stroller parallel to the table, with Teddy facing me. He's drowsy, starting to fall back asleep with his pacifier. Bailey is sat opposite, stewing over a cup of coffee. She slumped back in her chair and pulled out her cell phone. She pushed her long, curly hair over her left shoulder, and it's now that I can see the similarities between her and Ros. They have the same facial structure. High cheekbones, a full lower lip, and a powerful jawline. A face that can be both sweet and sour within seconds of each other. She studied her cell for a moment, but she snapped her head up as soon as the door at the front of the restaurant swung open.
Turning slowly, I caught my first glimpse of José. He's wearing loose-fitting jeans, a dark green t-shirt and his trusty rucksack. It's the same one he's had since freshman year. I can't help but smile at it.
"Ana!"
José called across the floor, finally spotting me at the back of the room. He grinned and moved quickly through the rows of tables, bumping into Sawyer along the way. I didn't react. I just stood up and smiled back to him.
Sawyer is sat at the next table, supposedly engrossed in today's newspaper. Ryan is occupying a table near the door, pretending to be on a phone call. And Reynolds is propped up on a stool, at the counter. No one would ever suspect they're here with me. They're professionals. They've done this before.
"Ana," José said my name again as he finally reached me.
He dropped his rucksack on an empty seat and pulled me into his chest. His arms squeezed around mine, and I caught the narrowed glare on Bailey's face. I gently shook my head at her.
"God, I've missed you," he mumbled in between heavy breaths. He feels clammy, like he's run here or something. I reached up under his grip and patted his back. "You look beautiful, as ever."
"Thank you," I felt a rush of colour warm my cheeks. I pulled away from José and gestured to the seat beside mine, before I lowered back down onto my chair. "You look great, too. Really… healthy…"
He laughed off my comment and slid down onto his chair. He looked across to Bailey and held his hand out to her.
"Oh, this is Bailey. Faith Bailey," I introduced them. "This is my friend, José Rodriguez."
"It's nice to meet you," Bailey shook his hand politely.
"And you," José nodded. He narrowed his eyes. "Are you a friend of Ana's?"
"Erm, no, not quite," I mumbled. I stared at Bailey, needing back up. What do I say?
"I'm the nanny," she announced enthusiastically, her whole posture changing in an instant. She shuffled on her seat and looked happily to the stroller. "Ana and her husband hired me about a month ago."
"Wow…" José's brows lifted in surprise. He turned his chin towards me. "You have a nanny? I never thought you'd be the type to have a nanny."
"Sometimes you just have to admit it when you need some help," I gulped. I inhaled a shaky breath and mouthed a thank you to Bailey. She nodded and took a sip of her coffee, blowing off the steam first.
I was glad to see the arrival of the waitress. I ordered quickly, picking the first item on the menu. I know I won't be able to eat it. I can never eat when I'm nervous and, right now, my insides are churning. José didn't seem to notice a thing and proceeded to order a black coffee and some pancakes. Bailey ordered an omelette and another steaming cup of Joe.
"Does the baby need anything?" José asked, nodding his head in the direction of the stroller. I realised then that I hadn't even offered him a look at Teddy.
I flustered on the spot and shook my head. "Erm, no, he's fine… He's only two months' old, there's nothing on the menu that's suitable for him." I managed a stilted laugh. I moved the stroller outwards, opening up José's view. "Sorry… José, this is Teddy. My pride and joy…"
I reached into the stroller and placed my hand on Ted's chest, feeling his rhythmic breaths under my fingertips. I can feel his heart beating and I can feel my own starting to settle, coming down a notch or two.
"He's freakin' beautiful," José admired him, his brown eyes wide and glistening. "Absolutely stunning… He looks like his momma."
I shook my head instantly. "He has my eyes and that's about it. Big blue eyes… You'll have to take my word for it. All being well, he'll be asleep for a while. He's an early bird. He likes to wake up at five."
"I've seen pictures of him awake," he told me and I wondered where he'd seen them. I haven't sent any pictures out… "How are you doing? I heard about the trouble you had, you know, giving birth…"
"It wasn't how we planned it," I nodded. "He wanted out. But it all worked out okay in the end. He's fine. That's all that matters."
"Well you matter, too," he disputed. He had that soft, baby-like expression, a look that always brought a grin to my face, regardless of whatever mood I was in. "I was really worried when I heard that you had surgery."
"I'm fine. Recovering well," I tried to comfort him, patting his upper arm.
"And how's Christian?" he asked, his voice full of genuine interest. I was taken aback by his question, but I shouldn't have been. José is polite and caring. He always has been.
"He's good, thank you. He's at work right now, building up Teddy's trust fund." I laughed.
"Pass on my well wishes to him, yeah?" he nodded, sincerely. He leaned back as the waitress arrived with our orders. He started ravaging his within seconds. Through a full mouth he mumbled, "Sorry, I'm starving. I overslept this morning."
"Don't sweat it. Geez, sleeping in seems like a distant memory for me now," I rolled my eyes and picked up my fork.
"It's just so weird…" he chomped. "I mean, you're a mom now. It's crazy… It feels like only five minutes since I bumped into on our first day at WSU. Now look at us. You're married. You have a kid… and I'm…"
"And you're what?" I prompted him when he trailed off and shook his head. "What's going on with you?"
"Not much in comparison," he lifted his brows and tilted his head to the side.
I ribbed my lower lip between my teeth and cut to the chase. "So what brings you to Seattle? I thought you'd still be in Portland."
"That was the plan," he nodded. "But I was offered a job just before graduation."
"That's great! Where are you working?"
"Art Visionnarie, you heard of it?" he asked. I shook my head. "It's an art magazine. It's mostly online, but they're starting to roll out prints. After my exhibition last year, they contacted me and asked if I was interested in some promotional work… I did a couple shoots in Vancouver, and then they called me into their head office here and offered me a contract. I started the day after graduation."
"Oh my god, José! I'm so happy for you!" I grinned.
"It's been a real whirlwind. I'm renting an apartment not far from here. They need me in Seattle for a few months, just while I'm in my probation period," he explained, somehow managing to keep his enthusiasm to a minimum. It's like the shine has already worn off. "I should be here 'til the end of September, and then I'm off."
"Off?"
"Travelling. They want me to shoot portraits to accompany their artist profiles. They really liked the portraits I did of you, actually," the right side of his mouth lifted. "Christian bought them at the exhibit but I still had the images saved on my computer. I included them in the portfolio I sent them, they're some of my favourite pictures."
I swerved that conversation. He might love those pictures, and Christian certainly loves them, but I can't stand them. Seeing my face close up, enlarged, and printed onto canvas? Not my cup of tea.
"Do you know where you'll be working?" I asked, instead.
"New York first," he nodded. "Then I'm off to Sydney, and then London. I'll be back in Washington for Christmas."
"It sounds incredible. You always planned on travelling after college," I patted his forearm, glad that he's achieving one of his dreams.
"I did. And I guess I have both you and Christian to thank for all of this."
"How do you come to that conclusion?" I giggled and shook my head.
"The article in the college magazine with Christian gave me an added boast," he clarified. "Everyone seems to love the pictures. It's amazing that he agreed to it in the first place."
"I think you should be thanking Kate for that one," I raised my brows. "Her constant pestering got Christian to agree to the interview."
My mind drifted back to last May… Arriving at GEH with Kate's questions and Dictaphone, full of nerves and jitters. Christian being so mysterious and intense. The photoshoot at The Heathman. It seems like a lifetime ago. I had no idea what I was letting myself in for…
I snapped back to reality and discovered José still talking. I shook my head and hoped he wouldn't notice I wasn't listening to him.
"No, I'm glad things are working out for you," I smiled. He smiled back. Phew… "It's kinda weird though, how we're only just seeing each other, when you've been in Seattle a few months… Does Ray know you're here?"
"Yeah, I had lunch with him a couple days ago," he frowned with confusion. "He didn't mention me?"
I shook my head.
"Weird…" he shrugged his shoulders and resumed his plate of pancakes. I've hardly touched my breakfast. I don't think I can even stomach a bite. Bailey, however, has almost demolished hers, checking her cell phone while she eats. "Maybe he's just so caught up on his Grandpa duties? I swear all he talks about is you and the baby. He's super proud of you, Ana."
"I know he is," I nodded.
"And I am, too," he said casually. "I'm really happy for you."
We fell silent for a moment, neither of us really knowing what to say to each other. My legs started to bounce underneath the table. I fiddled with my napkin, tearing at it.
"Why did you call me, Ana?" José said finally, his brows heavy around his eyes and his head still stooped. He pushed his plate aside and brought his coffee forward. "Don't get me wrong, it's great to hear from you, but I don't think you called me just because you wanted a catch up…"
I sighed and dropped the remainder of my napkin onto my plate. "Why didn't you let me know you were here?" I threw the question back at him.
He pursed his lips. "I didn't want to bother you… You're busy being Mrs Christian Grey, living it up in a big house with your brand new baby… I just didn't think you'd have time for me."
"Why would you think that?" I shook my head.
"I don't know," he shot the subject down and shrugged it off. He pushed back against his chair and lifted his eyes to mine. He forced a smile. "What's up, Ana? I know something's wrong. You've acted weird since I walked in... You can talk to me."
"I –"
A high pitched wail burst to life from inside the stroller. I snapped my head and saw Teddy's arms lifting towards his head, which is quickly becoming bright pink and frustrated. He kicked his legs out and let out an all mighty cry.
"Oh no, Teddy…" I lifted off my chair and reached into him, unbuckling and pulling him out. I held him to my chest and then it hit me. I looked back to José. "Sorry, I have to sort him out. He needs a new diaper."
"No problem," he held his hands up and nodded sympathetically. I stepped away from the table and tried to pick up his changing bag from underneath the stroller.
"Here, let me –" Bailey jumped to action, collecting the bag for me. She stood up and slung the bag strap over her shoulder. I frowned and she held her arms out to me. "I'll clean him up."
"Really?"
"It's my job, remember," she widened her amethyst coloured eyes and shot a look to José. "I'm the nanny. I can definitely manage a stinky diaper."
Before I knew it, she was lifting Teddy out of my arms and cradling him. I leaned into her and whispered, "You have changed a diaper before, haven't you? He has wipes, powder, cream and –"
"My girlfriend has three nieces and two nephews. I've done my fair share of diaper changes," she smiled, reassuringly. "I'm practically an expert, don't worry… I'll ask the waitress to heat up his milk, yeah?"
"Thanks," I nodded.
"Don't worry," she said again. "Sawyer is just there…"
She whisked Teddy off in the direction of the restrooms, leaving me alone with José. I hesitated before sitting back down. My eyes remained on the restroom door Bailey and Teddy just escaped through.
"If you were going to pretend she's anything, I'd go with assistant," José leaned forward and smiled. I narrowed my eyes and my mouth fell open. "She's security, isn't she?"
I inhaled a slow breath and nodded. He smiled.
"It's okay, I understand. Christian has security, it makes sense that you should too." He brought his cup to his mouth. He didn't mention anything about Sawyer, Ryan and Reynolds. I think their cover is secure enough. "Right, so spill the beans. What's going on?"
I looked beyond him, at the hustle and bustle of the restaurant. It's starting to fill up now. I watched as two middle aged women juggled with the door, trying to scoot their strollers and walking toddlers into the building. Sawyer scraped his chair back and forced my attention to him. He mouthed 'are you okay?' to me. I nodded and returned to José.
The concern in his eyes caused my stomach to twist with guilt. I dropped my elbows onto the table with a sigh.
"I'm really sorry I haven't made more of an effort to speak to you," I started. "I should have called sooner… Shit, I last spoke to you…"
"It was your birthday," he informed me. My stomach panged again. "It's completely fine. You had a lot of other stuff to think about. Ray was keeping me updated with how you were… And anyway, I should have reached out, too. Instead of just sitting there, twiddling my thumbs and wondering how you were."
"I'd always find time for you," I muttered, holding my hand out and placing it over his. I gave his fingers a gentle squeeze. "You're one of my closest friends."
"Igualmente," he smiled and wriggled his fingers underneath mine. A darkness came over his face before he asked, "Is there something going on, you know, between you and Christian?"
I clenched my jaw.
"Do you need my help?" his brows furrowed, closing in on each other.
I nodded. I dropped my head into my hands. "It's really complicated…"
"Then let's grab another drink," he suggested. "I've got all day. Just start at the beginning."
I let it go. I heaved a sigh and it all poured out.
I literally started at the beginning. I told José everything about Stephen Morton – from his marriage to my mother and how that ended, to what he's doing now with JWA and the file. And, thankfully, he was patient and let me speak without interruptions. He was shocked and disgusted by my admissions. I had never mentioned husband number three to him – all he knew was that my mother was now in her fourth marriage. He never cared to ask about husband number three, nor my birth father. It hit me while I was talking to him that José has never pried into my past. He's never pushed me for information. He only ever wanted to know as much as I was prepared to offer. He was content knowing just what I chose to give him.
Towards the end of my explanations, I told him the real reason I called. I told him about the file and the allegations, as well as the photographs. I pulled out an envelope from my purse, which I had filled with the pictures earlier this morning. I offered him only the pictures I need examining, leaving out the ones I already know are fake. He looked at them briefly and understood why I needed to know more about them. And when I told him that I do trust Christian, he agreed with me. He doesn't think Christian's capable of cheating.
"I feel really bad for asking you to do this," I admitted, carefully watching him place the pictures back into the envelope before shoving it into his rucksack. "Are you sure this is okay? You don't mind? I understand if you don't want to get involved –"
"Seriously, it's fine," he waved me off for the hundredth time. "I know what I'm looking for. I'll scan these onto my computer and zoom in to check for anomalies. As soon as I find anything, I'll call you."
"Thank you so much, José," I breathed a sigh of relief. "I know I could have asked anyone else to do this but I needed someone I know, someone who isn't going to turn around and stab me in the back."
You hope he isn't going to do that, my subconscious jabbed me in the ribcage, reminding me of what I asked Taylor to do.
"I'll try to get you the answers you need," he smiled and stood up from his chair. He hauled his rucksack back onto his shoulders and straightened out his t-shirt. "Is Christian okay with me doing this for you?"
"He doesn't know yet," I said quietly. The smile dropped from José's face in a flash. "I'll explain it to him later."
"He's not going to like it, is he?" he guessed. I shook my head and rolled my eyes. "Hm, looks like I'll be sleeping with one eye open tonight then!"
"I can handle him," I assured him. "I've had more than enough practice dealing with his bad moods. All of this stuff with Stephen is really getting to him."
"Knowing I'm hanging around probably isn't helping either," he added. I didn't want to nod or agree with him. He shrugged. "Ah, he has reason to hate me. I know he doesn't trust me… He's never going to forgive what I did that night. I don't really blame him either. If I was him, I'd have punched me in the face right there and then."
"You were drunk," I attempted to dismiss him but he shook his head, cutting me off.
"It's no excuse… You chose the right guy," he reached across and drew me into a hug. This time I hugged him back, squeezing him with equal love and warm. I rested my head on his shoulder, lifting up onto my toes. "I'm really happy for you guys… Now all that's left is for me to find the girl of my dreams."
"She's out there," I smiled, rubbing his back the same way I do when I'm soothing Teddy. He hummed a noise. "I know she is. You'll find her. Probably when you least expect it."
"That's a really lame cliché," he snorted. "Maybe I'll meet her in Australia?"
"Maybe you'll fall in love with Sydney and decide to move there," I thought out loud. "Hey, it'll give me a reason to visit. I still want to travel. Just now, I'll have a stroller added onto my luggage."
"I think even you can stretch to buying one of those baby carriers," he joked. He pulled back and separated from me. "While I'm here, I'd really like to hang out with you some more."
"I'd like that, too," I nodded. "We could have dinner together… I want you to get to know Teddy. I want you to be his honorary uncle… only if you want to be, of course. He already has Christian's brother, but I don't have any other family to offer him. I want to make sure he never feels alone and -"
"I'd be honoured to be his uncle," he flashed me a grin. He stooped down and pecked a kiss to my cheek. "I have to run. I need to stop by the office and speak to one of the journalists about an upcoming piece… Let me know about dinner. I'll call you about the pictures."
"I will," I returned his kiss and moved aside while he prepared to say his goodbyes to Teddy. Ted was calm and easy for Bailey while she changed and fed him a bottle. For a while, she was just holding him, cooing over him, before she returned him to his stroller where he has slept soundly for the last hour.
"See you later, alligator," José hunched over the stroller and tickled his fingers on Ted's stomach. "It was nice meeting you, Ted… Hopefully you'll be awake the next time I see you, yeah? Your Grandpa keeps bangin' on about Teddy hugs. I need to know what all the fuss is about."
José waved to Bailey and gave me another kiss before rushing out of the restaurant. Well, not before holding the door open for the pair of mothers who were also trying to leave. He held the door patiently, even helping one of them with her stroller, which wasn't cooperating with the narrow exit. He brushed off their gratitude, like a gentleman.
"He won't be single for long," Bailey spoke up. She stretched out her arms above her head and nodded to José. "With manners like that? I'm sure he'll have no trouble finding someone to settle with."
"I don't doubt it for a second," I agreed with her.
By 10:45pm my appetite had returned and I found myself wandering into the kitchen to find something to eat. I did attempt to eat lunch this afternoon, but Ted demanded my attention and by the time he had settled again, my soup was stone cold and I had no desires to reheat it.
I rummaged around and settled on a bowl of granola with some yoghurt and fruit. I hopped onto a stool and leaned over the counter, a spoon in my right hand and my cell phone in my left.
No messages from Christian. I frowned. He should have wrapped up his dinner by now.
I was about to dial his number when I heard footsteps behind me. I swivelled to face the doorway and waited.
"Hey," I smiled weakly as he came into view. "I was just about to call you. I was starting to get worried."
"I'm here now," he grunted, entering the kitchen and heading straight for the refrigerator. I followed his movements. He'd shed his jacket and tie already, and the top three buttons of his shirt were open.
He yanked open the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water, before slamming the door shut again. He cracked the lid and took a long, loud gulp from it.
"How was your business dinner?" I asked. Though I doubt it went well. His expression is hard and oozing annoyance over something.
"Fine," he shook his head once. "Productive."
"Good," I whispered, taking a silent mouthful of granola. He clearly doesn't want to talk –
"How was breakfast with José?"
Okay, maybe he does want to talk…
I lifted my eyes to his and found him scowling. He leaned up against the fridge, his arms folded and his bottle discarded onto the counter.
"Fine," I nodded. "It was nice to see him. We needed a catch up. I haven't seen him since my birthday."
"I know. I was there, remember?" he snapped, his voice remaining cool and off.
"What's wrong with you?" I lowered my spoon back into my bowl and frowned at him. "Did one of your associates piss you off or something?"
He didn't answer my question. He returned it with another. "So what did you and José talk about?"
Before I could give him my reply, he butted in.
"Or should I rephrase that," he cocked his head to the side. "What did you give José?"
I stared into his empty eyes and eased back against my stool. I retracted my hands into my lap.
He knows.
"Well?" he prompted.
"Who told you?" I asked. "Did Taylor tell you?"
"No, but he confirmed it," he seethed back at me. "I couldn't believe it and when I asked him if he knew, he said yes. He said you went to him this morning and told him all about your ridiculous plan."
I pressed my lips together, hard.
"You didn't think to include me in all of this?" his voice hitched. He sounded more upset than angry.
"You blew up in my face this morning," I shook my head. "When was I supposed to tell you?"
"About the same time you told me you were meeting with that prick," he pushed off the refrigerator and pressed forward onto the counter, leaning all his weight onto his palms. "Why, Ana?"
"Because I want to get to the bottom of this mess," I explained. I glanced down at my granola and suddenly felt sick. I turned my nose up at it and climbed down from my stool. "The pictures are the only things we can't explain. If we can prove they're fake, it doesn't matter if the media gets hold of them."
"And you really think fucking baby-faced José can magic up the answers for you?" he snorted. I don't like this side of his personality. His jealously. His obsessiveness. His temper.
"He knows more about this kind of stuff than either of us," I retorted, coolly. I picked up my bowl and walked over to the sink, dumping it into the basin. The contents splashed and emptied.
"I am so fucking pissed off right now," he grumbled, hanging his head low, between his shoulders. "You're supposed to consult me before –"
"And I would have, if you hadn't acted like a fucking child this morning," I finally snapped, raising my voice at him. "I was going to tell you but when you started going all Neanderthal man on me, I decided against it… Why? Because unlike you, I don't like arguments."
"You really think I'm enjoying this?" he spun to face me, his eyes now dark with fury. "You really think I wanted to hear about this from someone else?"
"Who told you? Sawyer? Reynolds? Did you pester Bailey for information?" I stepped forward, closing in on him.
He broke eye contact and eased back on his heels. And then it clicked.
I laughed.
"Oh god, you had someone else there, watching me," I shook my head. "You were spying on me."
"Ana –"
"Who? The waitress?" I guessed. He shook his head. I recalled the layout of the restaurant and tried to picture who it could have been. I didn't notice anyone looking over at me or hovering. "Who?"
"I called one of the women who escorted Grace around during the problems we had with Hyde," he answered. "She's no longer in security but she agreed to check in on the situation. She was meeting with a friend herself, anyway."
I narrowed my eyes.
"She was one of the mothers there?" I gasped. He nodded after a moment. I could have screamed there and then. "Are you fucking kidding me?"
"I had to be sure nothing was going to happen," he tried to defend himself.
"And you couldn't have just taken my word as Gospel, like any normal husband?" I shrieked. I slammed my hands onto my hips. "Oh my god… I don't fucking believe you sometimes… What was it, Christian? Were you worried Stephen would show up or is this all about José?"
He looked down. He didn't answer.
"You're insane," I shook my head at him.
"I'm just protecting what's mine," he griped. "I don't trust him to keep his hands to himself. And now that's not the only thing I have to worry about. You've given the fucker ammunition to -"
"Ammunition for what?" I threw my arms out to the sides.
"That file insinuates that I've been cheating on you, and you decide to hand over the pictures to the one guy on this planet who wants to get into your panties more than I do?" he jerked his head back and growled. "Are you serious? The first chance he gets, he's going to screw me over. He'll hand the pictures to the fucking newspaper himself."
I couldn't believe he was saying this, more so that he thinks it's true. I stood fixed to the spot and breathed deeply.
"You don't have a clue," I muttered. I rubbed my eyes with my fingers, to try to get rid of the stinging in them. "I asked José to get involved because I trust him. He knows what he's doing and he's the best ally we have right now."
"If you trust him so much, then why did you order a background check on him?" he fired back at me. I didn't bother to ask whether Taylor told him this, too. There was no point.
"Because it's better to be safe than sorry," I shrugged my shoulders. "Because I knew you'd run one anyway… I just wanted my friend's help."
"You should have spoken to your husband first."
"My husband shouldn't be such an asshole, then." I huffed and turned my back on him. I rolled my eyes in an attempt to keep my tears at bay. They're already threatening to make an appearance. "He asked me to pass on his well wishes to you. He was genuinely interested in how you are."
He snorted behind me. I didn't turn. I can't look at him right now.
"You know what else he said to me? He said he's happy for me and he's glad I chose you over him," I spoke as clearly as I could, free of my burgeoning emotions. "He said I chose the right man… He thinks our son is beautiful and he can't wait to get to know him while he's still here, in Seattle."
I stopped just before the doorway, my toes hovering on the divide.
"He thanked you for helping launch his photography career… because of the article Kate did and the pictures he took, a magazine offered him a job. He had nothing but praise for you," I shook my head and closed my eyes. "He is the closest thing I have to a brother, regardless of whether he liked me or not. He is a good man. He's never bitched about you to my face. But you? You stand there and bash him at every available opportunity."
Christian's fingers dropped onto my shoulder. I shrugged him off.
"I should have told you this morning. I should have sucked it up and put up with another Christian Grey bitch-fit, but I couldn't," I heaved a quiet sob. "I just couldn't…"
He took hold of me again and turned me on the spot, forcing me to face him. I looked up at him through my watery gaze.
"I can't," I shook my head and backed off from him. I wiped my tears with the back of my sleeve.
"Ana –"
"It's not even just José," I sniffed. "You hate me being around any man… You even hate Mark and he's gay… and now you're hiring people to spy on me? Do you have any idea how that makes me feel?"
His eyes changed shape and became more doe like.
"You keep saying that you don't trust other men," I gulped. "But it's starting to feel like you don't trust me with other men."
"No," he shook his head.
"Which I think you'll agree is pretty disgusting, considering all the bullshit Stephen is claiming about you," I looked him up and down and backed out of the kitchen. I held my hands up in the air and shook my head. "I can't do this right now."
"Ana, wait," he rushed forward a pace. "Don't run off."
"I'm not running but please, don't make me stand here," I tilted my head. "Because I'm going to end up saying something I'm going to regret. We both will…"
"Ana –"
"Red…"
I felt his eyes staring after me as I headed upstairs. I climbed into our bed and curled around his pillow, feeling the weight of the world collapse onto me.