Vr: (playing Minecraft)
Marune: (watching)
Vr: (finishes building a giant Kai, then lights the whole thing on fire) Ehehehe. Want a turn, Marune?
Marune: Sure! (builds a giant Jay, then blows it all up)
(with Kai and Jay)
Kai: AAAAAAAAAHHHHH! I'M ON FIRE! (running around, waving his hands)
Everyone: ...
Jay: I'M BEING BOMBED! BOMBED!
Cole: ... (slaps Jay)
Jay: Oh, it's all gone-AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!
(back with Vr and Marune)
Marune: (finishes blowing up giant Jay) What now?
Vr: Ooh, I know, I know, I know!
Marune: (cleaning daggers) What?
Vr; Let's give some "presents" to our favorite characters.
Marune: ...did you buy me chocolate?
Vr: No, you have to wait until the 25th.
Marune: Awwwwww!
Vr: That's the rules, Marune.
Vr: Hey everyone! Welcome back to Dawn of the Ninja Dares! I'm your host Vr! (tosses a sack of presents into the room)
Jay: Ooh, what are those?
Vr: (gives Jay a present)
Jay: EE! SOMEONE CARES ABOUT ME! (opens up present and pulls out a target) Huh?
Vr: (loads bow and fires an arrow at Jay)
Jay: AAAAAAAAAH! (blocks arrow with target)
Vr: Damn it. (Shoots sack and the presents fly into everyone's hands)
Kai: (opening present) I knew you secretly cared about me!
Vr: Oh, go jump in a pit of flaming death!
Kai: No, somebody will probably dare me to do that. (present sets him on fire) AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! I'M ON FIRE AGAIN! HELP!
Everyone: ...
Cole: You never were before.
Kai: STFU AND HELP ME HERE!
Vr: We'll just leave him like that. Now, finish opening up your presents because WE GOT DARES!
Lloyd: Why do I have three pairs of boxing gloves in mine?
Vr: Because you, Cole and Hothead get the honor of beating up Chen!
Lloyd and Cole: (smile evilly)
Kai: (still screaming bloody murder)
Lloyd: (puts on a pair of boxing gloves) Hold him down, Cole!
Chen: (running for his life)
Cole: (tackles Chen)
(one beat-up session later)
Chen: (all bruised and cowering under Clouse's chair)
Clouse: (just done with this)
Lloyd: Oh man, that was fun!
Misako: ...I did not raise you like this...
Garmadon: LLOYD, YOU SHOULD'VE GONE FOR THE KILL! NEXT TIME, KNOCK HIM DEAD!
Misako: -_-
Vr: Boys will be boys and they'll love beating things up. Next dare!
Marune: Kai's gotta do an Irish jig.
Vr: I know how to do that! (sets Kai on fire)
Kai: (screaming and running around in the form and an Irish jig)
Everyone: AHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Kai: T_T You're all evil. I swear Vr, you should be Ninjago's next villain. You'd make a great one!
Vr: I'll take it as a compliment, despite hating Kai's guts. Next is for...LLOYD!
Lloyd: (screams a scream of rage)
Vr: How enthusiastic. Jump into a pit...of things.
Lloyd: What kind of things?
Vr: Any pit that you've dealt with before, NOW GO!
(at a huge pit that contains lots of stuff)
Lloyd: Calm down, Lloyd. Just jump. (jumps) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!
Vr: Maybe I should've given him a book on how to survive pits instead of those boxing gloves.
Kai: Yeah, a lot of these gifts are questionable.
Vr: So is how sexy you are.
Everyone: AHAHAHAHAHA!
Kai; T_T You suck.
Vr: And so do you. Next dare!
Marune: ...
Vr: (reads dare) Wha-NO!
Marune: (picks up Vr's bow)
Vr: Don't you dare, Marune! DON'T YOU DARE!
Marune: (bends Vr's bow sideways)
Vr; (sobs as she picks up the bow and cradles it close) MY BABY, NO! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME!?
Kai: HA! Now you know how we feel!
Vr: (whacks Kai on the head with the bow) Shaddup! This is my child and it deserves to be loved more than you!
Everyone: ...
Vr: (fixing bow) We better move on.
Marune: Okay, um...Zane's gotta sing Hey Brother.
Vr: Oh thank goodness my bow's safe for this one.
Kai; As cool as it may look, nobody gives a crap about your bow.
Vr: ...(tackles Kai)
Marune: 0_0 You should probably start singing, Zane.
Hey brother! There's an endless road to rediscover
Hey sister! Know the water's sweet but blood is thicker
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
Hey brother! Do you still believe in one another?
Hey sister! Do you still believe in love? I wonder
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
What if I'm far from home?
Oh brother, I will hear you call!
What if I lose it all?
Oh sister, I will help you hang on!
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
Zane: Alright, I'm done...are they done yet?
Vr: (whacking Kai with bow over and over) Give me...5 more...minutes!
Kai: OW, OW, OW, OW, OW, OW!
Marune: ...I think you're done...
Vr: Fine. (gets off Kai) Let's see...Wu and Garmadon have to toast each other.
Garmadon: Roast.
Vr: Huh?
Garmadon: Don't you mean roast one another?
Vr: Yeah, toasting. That's what it says.
Wu: (pulls out a glass of tea)
Cole: Aren't toasts usually done with alcohol?
Wu: I do mine with tea. Come on, let's toast!
Garmadon; (shoves Wu into a toaster)
Wu: AAAAAAAAAHHH!
Everyone: ...
Gamradon: What? I'm toasting him.
Vr: Where did you get the toaster?
Garmdon; Long story. Anyway, never trust appliance store giveaways.
Vr: (rolls eyes) Moving on! Next is for Nya. (gives Nya one of Marune's daggers)
Marune: Hey!
Nya: Thank you. (chases Kai)
Kai: (runs) NO, YOU CANNOT STAB ME!
Nya: WHY THE HECK NOT!?
Kai: BECAUSE IF YOU DID, I WOULD DIE!
Vr: I can live with that!
Kai: SHADDUP!
Vr: Nya, stab him.
Ny: I'm trying! (get a fireball to the face) OW!
Vr; You know what, let's just move on. Next dare!
Marune: Cole needs to read Jaya.
Cole: ...
Vr: Problem with that, Cole?
Cole: ...(reading)
Vr: Shall we introduce him to the lemons?
Cole: PLEASE DON'T!
Vr: Alright, alright! Next is for...Cole. Again.
Cole: (scream of rage)
Vr: Slam dunk a rock that looks like a dodgeball on Kai.
Cole; That's something I can pull off. (slam dunks on Kai)
Kai: (out cold)
Vr: Finally, we can get dome peace and quiet in here. Next!
Marune: (whispers dares to Vr)
Vr: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Everyone: 0_0
Nya: Not good.
Vr: (gives Garmadon a piece of paper with some random crap written on it) Okay, I've set up a reservation for you and Clouse. Have fun!
Garmadon: (sighs)
(at a fancy French restaurant)
Clouse: ...why are we here again?
Garmadon: Because the dare said so.
Clouse: Don't look now...but there is a group of fangirls staring at us...
Fangirls: OMFG, GARMADON AND CLOUSE-SENPAI!
Garmadon: Run!
(Garmadon and Clouse run through the restaurant screaming as the fangirls chase them. Anyone else in the restaurant just sits there with confused looks on their faces))
Vr: It was canon...for a second.
Kai: Yeah, that's as close as any of your pairings get.
Vr: Oh, shut up. Chen gets to slap you for the whole staff incident.
Chen: (slaps Kai)
Kai: OW! IT WAS FOR THE GREATER GOOD OF NINJAGO!
Chen: STAFFS HAVE FEELINGS TOO!
Kai: -_-
Vr: Yeah Kai, you hurt the poor staff's feelings. Now it will forever long to feast on your soul.
Kai: ...wut...?
Cole: Better sooner than later.
Vr: Yeah. Next is for...Wu and Garmadon to do a parody of Mulan's I'll Make a Man Out of You.
Garmadon: (sighs)
(after singing because my computer is screwing me and I couldn't find the lyrics. Sorry, Jonathen)
Garmadon: I am done.
Vr: I didn't ask, but okay then. Next is for Morro, Kai, Cole and Nya!
Morro, Kai, Cole and Nya: (cue the screams of rage)
Vr: Shaddup, or I'll shut you up for you! (screams stop) Thanks. You guys have to fight those Xiaolin Dragons guys in an Xiaolin Showdown. (pulls out a bunch of Shen Gong Wu) I totally did not rob anyone of these. Here Kai, take one!
Kai: (grabs a Shen Gong Wu) The heck is this?
Omi: (randomly bursts in and grabs another one) We've triggered a Xiaolin Showdown!
Kai: Aw crap.
(the room changes into an intense-looking arena)
Kai: This is just downright terrifying.
Cole: Amen, brother.
Nya: We're dead. We're all dead.
Omi: Well, let's finish what you four started. (grabs the Kaijin Charm and blasts it at Morro)
Morro: Water! (jumps)
Kai: Still afraid of water? (water hits him in the face) HEY!
Nya: Two can play at this game! (sends a spurt of water flying at Omi)
Clay: (pulls out the Black Beetle, which shelters him with amour, then blocks Nya's shot)
Nya: Crap.
Kimiko: (uses the Emperor Scorpion and causes the Shen Gong Wu to attack Morro, Kai, Cole and Nya)
Morro, Kai, Cole and Nya: (scream)
(after the smoke has cleared)
Kai: Is it over?
Vr: Yes, Kai, it's over.
Kai: (sighs)
Vr: We were talking about the fight, not the dares.
Kai: (groans)
Vr: Now, Cole gets to have a cake eating contest with Stampylonghead.
Cole; Yay, cake!
Vr: Let's see who wins. (shoves a table a cakes in front of Cole and Stampy) And...GO!
(cake gets eaten pretty damn quickly.)
Marune: How are they not full?
Vr: I swear, they're cursed from birth with cake-eating powers or something.
Marune: Oh.
Cole: Cake number 376...I can't go on...cake...377...(faints)
Stampy: (finishes off the rest of the cakes)
Vr: You lost, Cole.
Cole: I know, I know.
Kai: I have nothing to say.
Vr: Good, then shut up! Next is for...the Overlord?
Marune: Oh boy.
Garmadon: What's in it for him?
Vr: Spazz fairies everywhere...great, just faaking great.
66samvr: (groans) So many fairies...
Vr: Hey! Nobody asked your opinion! (66samvr drops a cinder block on her head) OW! OKAY, OKAY, YOU'RE OPINION IS CONSIDERED! (66samvr drops another cinder block) DAMN IT WOMAN, WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?
Kai: You're just asking for it.
Vr: Why haven't i shot you in the face yet?
Kai: Because I'm too sexy.
Vr: No you're not.
Marune: Because you need him for other dares and without him, you have nobody to insult.
Vr: True. It just wouldn't be the same. Next dare!
Marune: Zane needs to talk like Brian Hull and have a Frankenstein voice contest with him.
Zane: Like this?
Vr: Can you do voice impressions like him? Wait, why am I asking a nindroid this?
Marune: I still think the original talks better.
Zane: Hey! Take that back!
Marune: ...no. He does a better Frankenstein than you.
Vr: Ah, my little savage cat co-host, how I adore you! Next is for...Wu to hear about a dream (tosses dream at Wu). Let's move on to...Garmadon. How did you feel about your family when you were evil?
Garmadon: ...we do not speak of that time anymore.
Vr: Evil Garmadon.
Garmadon: please don't.
Vr: Evil Garmadon, evil Garmadon, evil Garmadon, evil Garmadon-
Garmadon: (triggered)
Vr: Ehehe, it's fun to do this to you people. Next is for...everyone. To be nice to Jay. Until chapter 50.
Jay: YAY!
Everyone: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Vr: Can't guarantee any promises, Jay.
Jay: ...everything has just crashed and burned for me.
Vr: Come on, you knew it wouldn't last. Next!
Marune: Overlord gotta sing something.
Overlord: I do not sing, I take over! This body was built for world domination, not entertainment!
Vr: And this body was built for shooting arrows at people if they disobey me, not for letting them not do their dares!
Overlord: ...fine.
My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus' blood and righteousness
I dare not trust the sweetest frame
But wholly lean on Jesus' name
(I'm leanin' on Jesus)
(I'm leanin' on Jesus, Jesus)
(I'm leanin' on You)
When darkness fails, His lovely face
I rest on His unchanging grace
(Every high and stormy gale)
In every high and stormy gale
(My anchor holds within the veil)
My anchor holds within the veil
On Christ, the solid rock, I stand
All other ground is sinking sand
All other ground is sinking sand
(All other ground is sinking, sinking)
(All other ground is sinking, sinking sand)
His oath, His covenant, His blood
Support me in the whelming flood
When all around my soul gives way
He then is all my Hope and Stay
Overlord: Well, what do you think?
Everyone: ...
Vr: You weren't kidding when you said you weren't built for singing. Next is for...Pythor! More singing.
Pythor: (sighs) Why?
Vr: (tapping foot impatiently)
Pythor: Fine!
He's the one who makes the sun shine
He's the one who that puts the moon in the sky
He's the one who hung the stars
One by one
He's the one who makes the birds sing
He's the one who makes your dreams so high
He's the one who makes me smile
Day by day
Jesus you're my superhero
You're my star, my best friend
Jesus you're my superhero
You're my star, my best friend
Vr: (uncovers ears) Yeah, maybe no more singing for you. Let's move on. Next!
Marune: Morro needs to fight Danny Phantom. If he loses, he's stuck inside a thermos for 5 chapters.
Lloyd: AHAHAHAHAHAH! A THERMOS! AHAHAHAH!
Mooro: I'll shove you inside a thermos if you don't shut up!
Vr: (pulls out list) Adding that to "Future Dares I'd Pay Money to See".
Kai: Just start the damn fight already.
Vr: Don't tell me how to do my job!
Danny: What's going on?
Vr: Fight this ghostly bastard.
Danny: If you say so.
Morro: Crap. (gets blasted with Ghost Ray) AAAAAAAH!
Vr: Do something, dammit!
Morro: (pulls out the Sword of Sanctuary and deflects two shots of Ghost Ray) HA! (Danny uses Ghostly Wail) Oh no...
(after everyone pulled Morro out of the floor)
Morro: (now trapped in a thermos) T_T
Vr: I'm not letting you out until chapter 41!
Morro: Aw.
Vr: Moving on! Next is for the ninja to fight Percy Jackson and Nico.
Cole: Who's Nico?
Vr: ...seriously, Cole?
Percy: What's going on here?
Vr: You need to defeat these guys.
Nico: Why?
Vr: Because...they work for Luke.
Percy: Oh really? You're not escaping on my watch!
Nico: (creates those skeleton army guys) Ready, Percy!
Percy: Attack!
Nya: I'll take care of this! (shoots water at Percy)
Vr: You might not want to fight water with water Nya...
Percy: (takes the shot and sends it flying at Kai)
Kai: Son of a- (knocked out the window) AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
Cole; ATTACK! (skeleton punches jay out the window) Godamnit, Jay!
Zane: (runs at Nico full speed)
Nico: (jumps behind some skeletons, which Zane crashes into)
Cole: Lloyd, Nya, it's down to us. (Percy blasts Lloyd and Nya with a spray of water) Like I was saying...(runs)
Nico: GET HIM, PERCY!
Percy: (splash)
Cole: (knocked out)
Vr: Thanks Percy, I think they're out for the count. Next is for...Lloyd! To dye his hair pink.
Lloyd: (now with pink hair) -_-
Cole: He looks like Natsu.
Vr: Yeah, but he's still an annoying little bastard.
Lloyd: Hey!
Vr: It's the hard, cold truth, Lloyd. Next dare!
Marune: Cole's gotta try cooking.
Vr: Fine. Just please don't set the kitchen on fire. Where else am I gonna get my sandwiches?
Cole: Can't make any promises.
Vr: Just go cook something!
(while Cole's making whatever)
Vr: (throws a King down) Ha! I am gonna win!
Marune: (throws down an Ace)
Vr: Damn it. You almost done, Cole?
Cole: Yeah. (comes out with a bowl of noodles)
Marune: You found my hidden stash of instant noodles, didn't you?
Cole: Yes.
Vr: Despite that, he still managed to ruin them. Next is for...Zane needs to scan everyone and find a perfect match that isn't canon.
Marune: So...crackships.
Vr: Yes.
Zane: Scanning...scanning...
Vr: And?
Zane: (whispers matches to Vr)
Vr: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Jay: What?
Vr: Zane's a bruiseshipper, aren't you?
Zane: Somewhat?
Cole: (rolls eyes)
Jay: ...
Vr; Kai, decorate yourself in washi tape.
Kai; (wrapped up in an entire roll) ...
Vr: This is gonna be fun. (peels off tape)
Kai: (screams a scream of rage) WHY!?
Vr: Because! Next, Jay has a dare, but since he can't be dared until chapter 37...(whispers dare to Cole)
Cole: (connects two wires to Jay)
Jay: Cole? Cole, what are you doing? Cole? COLE!
Cole: (attaches wires to a cable)
Jay: Don't do it, Cole! DON'T DO IT!
Cole: (pulls the trigger)
Jay: AAAAAAAH! COLE, WHAT DID I SAY!?
Cole: (rolls eyes)
Vr: Jay, nobody cares. Nya, blue pancakes.
Nya: (eats the pancakes) I think my tongue's blue now.
Vr: Yes it is. Lloyd, you're a cat.
Lloyd: (now a green cat) This is pointless, being a cat.
Marune: Hey!
Vr: Ignore him, you know how stupid Lloyd can be. (reads next dare) HOLY- (throws dare to the floor)
Cole: What the- (leans over to read dare) AAAAAAAAAH!
Everyone: AAHHHHH!
Vr; ...I think...we have to...
Cole: No, wait! (pulls out an idol attached to a necklace) I play this for me!
Vr: Nice fake hidden immunity idol, Cole, but it ain't gonna save you. It looks pretty nice, though.
Jay: You saw that episode too?
Vr: Shut up, Jay. This has nothing to do with you.
Kai: Yeah Jay, shut up.
Vr: Don't you start!
(one rather disturbing dare later)
Cole: (changed into his normal clothes)
Kai: Really, Cole? Really?
Cole: Says the guy who pulled a 50 Shades a few chapters ago.
Kai: Fine, you win that argument.
Vr: I don't want to talk anymore. I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY, ATTACK ON MLG!
Ronin: THAT WAS AWESOME!
Everyone: ...
Ronin: What?
Everyone: (disapproving glares)
Vr: Nobody wants your opinion Ronin, ya dirty-minded freak!
Ronin: T_T
Vr: Now, let's all attempt to clear that out of our systems-
Zane: I already did.
Vr: That's nice, Zane. Next is for Kai, Zane, Lloyd and Cole!
Cole: Wasn't I tortured enough?
Vr: No. Reenact that Christmas dance from Mean Girls.
Kai, Zane, Lloyd and Cole: (epic sighs)
(one fail of an reenactment later)
Kai: Well, hooray. We're done-
Everyone: (reading some fanfiction)
Vr: What was that, Kai? I couldn't hear you over the sound of how annoying you are!
Kai: -_- What the hell are you doing?
Vr: What does it look like we're doing?
Lloyd: Reading something?
Vr: No, we're skydiving!
Lloyd: Really?
Vr: ...are you for real? Let's just move on.
Marune: Next is for Skylor, Pixal and Nya to try and sell Girl Scout cookies.
Vr: Yeah, good luck with that.
(in Ninjago City)
Skylor: Hi sir! Would you like some-
Person: No thanks.
Pixal: You sure?
Person: No, I'm good.
Pixal: According to my stats and the information I found out about these cookies-
Person: I said no.
Nya: (leaps on the person and shoves a box towards his throat) I don't care what your damn excuse is, you're buying a box of these damn cookies!
Pixal: ...
Skylor: Nya's gonna learn the hard way that she has crappy marketing strategies.
Person: 0_0 Fine, I'll take a box.
Vr: Sounds like someone needs some help selling.
Kai: Did you ever threaten people with your bow?
Vr: To buy cookies? No! Why would I waste my arrows of random people?
Kai: (eye roll)
Vr: Moving on! I gotta be nice to Kai...for a chapter...
Kai: HA! Shooting's off the table!
Vr: Well...Kai, your hair doesn't look like dog vomit for once.
Kai: (clapping really slowly)
Lloyd: So, it looks like dog vomit every other day?
Kai: You're not helping.
Vr: There's no way on Earth I could do that . Next is for...Kai.
Kai: Knew it. Just knew it.
Vr: Shaddup, Kai. Call Cole your sweetheart.
Kai: Why?
Vr: Because.
Kai: Why?
Vr: Because I'll shoot you in the face if you don't.
Kai: 0_0 Good reason.
Vr: Good decision. Zane, talk in a British accent.
Zane: You mean, this accent?
Vr: You sound like Thomas Ridgewell.
Zane: No, I don't!
Marune: Yeah, you do.
Zane: No!
Vr: Zane, just accept the fact that we're right. Next is for...
Nya: Hopefully not me.
Vr: (staring at Nya)
Nya: It's me, isn't it.
Vr: Yes. (tosses some fanfic at Nya) Read and have fun.
Nya: 0_0 Wut...
Vr: Cole, take off your shirt.
Cole: No!
Vr: (loading her bow)
Cole: (takes off shirt)
Kai: ...this is for my benefit, isn't it...
Vr: Shaddup Kai, there are plenty of fangirls who would pay money to see this. Next dare!
Marune: The ninja, minus Jay, have to make Stan laugh.
(16-year-old boy walks in. He has short but choppy black hair, brown eyes, pale skin and a platinum necklace. He wears a Sword Art Online shirt with blue skinny jeans and matching Jordans.)
Kai: This guy?
Vr: Kai, when somebody mentions an Oc, and a new person walks in, who the hell do you think we're talking about?
Kai: I hate it when you have at least a decent argument.
Vr: Shaddup. Just, shaddup.
Stan: Someone needed to say it.
Vr: I'm the only one with the guts to say it.
Kai: You're also pretty much the only person we're all somewhat afraid of-
Vr: I SAID SHADDUP! GO DO YOUR DARE!
Kai: 0_0 Hey, wanna hear a joke?
Stan: No.
Kai: Yes? Okay. What happens when three ninja walk into a bar?
Stan: The bartender is revealed to hold a grudge against the red one, beats him up, and tosses him out with his bare hands?
Kai: ...no, that's not how it goes.
Stan: That's how I wanted it to go.
Kai: I don't care.
Vr: You're gonna trigger him. Or me.
Kai: Like I said, I don't-
Vr: (slaps Kai)
Stan: (smirks)
Vr: See, I can get him to at least smile.
Kai: I am done with this crap.
Vr: I am done with your attitude! (nutshots Kai)
Kai: OW!
Stan: (grins)
Vr: Enough of that. Next is for the ninja, minus Zap Von Trap of course, to do the mannequin challenge!
(the ninja pose)
Vr: (shoves Kai into the others and causes a domino effect)
Kai: HEY!
Vr: I had to, I just had to. Next!
Marune: The villains gotta listen to It's All About Me.
Vr: Not a problem. While they do that, any other dares?
Marune: Um...Kai and Cole have some friends to fight.
(A guy with shaggy hair, a guy with green hair and ripped tux, and a guy with only ahlf a face all appear)
Kai: This is just plain screwed.
(one beat-up session later)
Kai and Cole: (lying all battered on the ground)
Vr: Real swell fight I saw you put up there.
Kai: Thanks.
Vr: Not you, I was talking to Cole!
Cole: I'm sore all over.
Vr: Not my problem. Come on Marune. Let's go get some hot chocolate.
Marune: Yay! Can I open my present now?
Vr: No.
Marune: Awww!
Merry Christmas! Feliz Navidad! Joyuex Noel! Bon Natale!
This will be the last chapter uploaded before Christmas of 2016. Sorry for the wait! I didn't always get a chance to work on this, sometimes didn't feel like working, the typical. So, here you go, a Christmas special (somewhat).
Did anyone catch my Survivor reference? I love that show! To any Survivor fans, I loved that Adam won! He deserved it! What a beautiful ending to an Mazzini season!
Send in them dares for more! (But please, no more M rated dares).