DarkLadyRebel - I love him too. Spread the Mercutio love!
Some of you may recognise several Capulets being mentioned from an awesome story already uploaded on this site. This chapter is dedicated to Cornodopia...
The rest of the October half term rushed by, and soon they were back at school. Tybalt and Rosaline came to visit for a little while. Tybalt called Hermia a slut when she made fun of him for his late entrance to university, so Hermia retaliated by telling him she was going to stuff a dirty diaper up the engine of his car. Lord Capulet broke up the fight. And that was the end of that. For now. Tybalt went back to university, Mercutio left for Brazil. In the meantime, Hermia got huger and huger, and was waddling around Verona like nobodies business. As mid-November approached, the Capulets were sitting around talking about the upcoming Christmas.
"I think we should have a lovely big, family Christmas, with everyone here" clucked Regina.
"But we might have the baby here by then. It might not be a good idea to have loads of people around the place" added Juliet.
"Well, my brother said he intended on coming for Christmas one year soon. And this year it seemed like he wanted to come and bring his family" said Lord Capulet.
"And not everyone has to stay here, in the Manor. They could just stay at the house they use when they're in Verona" pointed out Rosaline.
"Yes, good idea" nodded Lord Capulet.
"Who's coming?" asked Tybalt, biting the lid of a can of beer with his teeth and spitting it out again.
"Who do you think is coming, Tybalt?" asked Hermia idly.
"The family" replied Tybalt.
"Right. The family. So, that's everyone who is a Capulet, dumbass"
Tybalt glared at her angrily "I meant, which ones in our family are coming. Some of them live in France, and we've got one in Germany"
"Cousin Ludwig!" snorted Juliet.
Hermia giggled "Which of our cousins live in France, Tybalt?"
"Well, you know!" said Tybalt crossly "Theobald, Ricardo, and A...All...A...Alleg-"
"Say it, Tibby!" encouraged Hermia sarcastically. Tybalt looked like he was choking, and had turned completely white. Hermia snorted delightedly.
"Whatever! You know who I mean! The evil one!"
Hermia openly laughed "Allegra's not evil!"
"Yes, she is! I still have a scar from when she emptied half a packet of itching powder down my trousers!"
"It was your own fault for scratching" shrugged Hermia. Tybalt narrowed his eyes at her.
"Knock it off, you two" instructed Lord Capulet.
"Oh, yes, invite the family and let them stay here" said Hermia evilly "I don't mind about the baby, as long as Allegra is here to spend some quality time catching up with her most favouritest cousin in the whole wide world"
At this she did a freaky eye-bulging trick at Tybalt. Tybalt recoiled.
"I'm staying at the bungalow then. I have enough work to be getting on with anyway"
"Hey, listen to this, Tybalt wants to do his school work! You've changed your tune. Did Mercutio hit you over the head before he left for Brazil?"
Tybalt shuddered, remembering the tussle with the sari.
"You lot are out to get me" he snarled.
"You wish, Tybalt, you wish" sang Hermia.
"Enough!" commanded Lord Capulet "Look. What do you kids want for Christmas?"
"We're not kids" said Tybalt.
"You'll always be my baby" cooed Regina "Even though you're all grown up and at university, and married. You're still my sweet baby Tibby cat"
"Thank you, mum" grunted Tybalt.
"I think, for Christmas day" said Hermia "We should invite the Montagues to tea, especially for you, Tybalt"
"That's not a bad idea. It might be nice to extend our hospitality towards them in the season of sharing and-" began Juliet.
"No" said Tybalt "This Christmas is a recipe for disaster! Hermia will probably be ready to drop or already have her brat, that...demon Allegra will be here, and Montagues! I will not have Romeo shovelling food off of my plates, and I won't have Mercutio verbally abusing me at every last damn opportunity. If I ever see Mercutio again, I'm going to strangle him with his precious sari he tried to give me. I will. I'll hurt him. I'll physically hurt him!"
"Then I'll hurt you" added Hermia.
"I want to see you try" hissed Tybalt.
"Fine then, I'll take you on. As soon as this thing is out of me, I'll..."
"Pack it in!" snapped Lord Capulet "Hermia, just go...and finish your birth plan or something. The baby's full term now. It could come any minute. Go and get everything sorted"
"Fine" said Hermia "Rather be preparing my boy's bedroom than spending anymore time in Tybalt's poisonous company" Hermia did a second freaky eye bulging trick at Tybalt.
"Will you two just pack it in?" pleaded Juliet. Hermia struggled up, and slowly moved up the stairs.
"Whore" muttered Tybalt under his breath.
"Oi" said Juliet "Watch your mouth"
Tybalt simply scowled at her, and then turned away. The thought of his younger cousin visiting this Christmas made him shudder.