37: Promises and Lies
Lane sat cross legged on Beth's bed in her pajamas braiding Beth's wet hair as the little girl chattered about her upcoming dance recital. She was so excited to have a small solo and Lane couldn't help but smile, remembering nights like this with her own mother. Though being a diplomat's wife had kept her spectacularly busy, Anabeth Ryker always made time for her children. She had been loving and nurturing. Sometimes demanding but equally supportive. Their friends had always been welcome and when a young man with a rough life befriended her son, he'd become a member of the family too.
There were always days when she missed her mother desperately and this was one of them. Anabeth would have adored that her two sons had named their daughters after her. She would have loved that little Beth followed in her Auntie Lane's footsteps. Lane was glad, though, that her mother wasn't here to see how messed up it had all become. It would have broken Anabeth's heart to know what her husband and son had been dragged into.
"Bed time, kitten," Danny said, standing at Beth's door.
Lane slid off the bed and set Beth's brush on her nightstand. She pulled the covers over Beth's crossed legs and then waited for Danny to kneel on the floor next to her and lean over Beth's bed to say their nightly prayers. Her parents had done the same with them when they were children and it warmed her heart to feel like they were passing on a piece of that love.
When Lane found out in her early twenties that she would be unable to have children, she had gone into a depression. It was something that she struggled mightily with. Eventually she'd made her peace with it, as much as she ever would, but it was moments like this that made her realize she was missing out on a different part of life.
Why was she so melancholy tonight? It had been so easy to let herself forget about real life in the bliss of the last few days. She knew that time with Ray had been the eye of the storm and it made her sad to know it was ending. Who knew what would remain standing in the wake of the chaos.
She followed Danny downstairs. He pulled a beer out of the fridge and offered her one. When she refused, he grabbed a bottle of water and set it before her. He sat in the bar stool adjacent to her and twisted to cap off his beer.
"So Ray tracked you down, huh?" he asked, taking a pull from the bottle.
"No, he didn't actually. He's done everything in his power to push me away."
"He should. He shouldn't have allowed you to become involved in this. It's too dangerous."
"And yet you're involved. And what about Beth, for God's sake?"
"Beth is safe as long as I do what's expected of me," Danny said, gruffly.
"No matter how morally repugnant? My God, Danny, you were raised better than that."
"Was I, Laney? You were raised better than that. I was raised to follow orders. I wasn't afforded the same luxuries you were. I had to keep Dad happy and you and Mom safe," he said, his eyes, so like her own, flashing at her in anger. She couldn't find it in herself to feel sorry for him.
"You know what I can't reconcile in my mind? How you left your best friend—your brother—to face this alone."
"Ray made his choice! I tried to keep him from getting involved but he didn't listen. He was always too damn noble."
"Someone had to be! He got involved to help you. To watch your back. And you just left him to burn. Literally," she retorted angrily.
"How can you take his side?"
"How can I take yours? Danny, you are my big brother and I love you with all my heart but this is wrong."
"Laney, I made a choice when I was young that has changed the course of my whole life. I was too weak to say no to Dad. I wanted his approval so badly. I hate myself every day for that but I'm stuck now that I have Beth. They own me," his face and voice were tortured, raw. It hurt her to see her brother like this. She reached out and clasped his arm on the counter.
"Then let Ray help you. Let him get you out."
"He can't, Laney. Even if he gets me out, there's Beth. There's you."
"Let me worry about me. I can keep myself safe."
"No, sis, you can't," he said sadly.
"Then we'll all go."
"It doesn't work like that."
"Why not?" she demanded, frustrated.
"Because it just doesn't," he said tiredly with a defeated sigh. "There's going to come a day, Laney, when they pit me against Ray."
"If you both refuse to fight, then they've got nothing," she said desperately.
"They'll have you and Bethany and Elizabeth. That's all the leverage they need."
"They know about Elizabeth?"
"They've always known. They just didn't know who or where she was. Ray's return changed that." He took a breath and clasped his hand over hers. "I need you to make me a promise."
"What promise?"
"I need you to promise me that if something happens to me, you and Ray will do what you need to do to keep Beth safe."
"Danny, you're scaring me."
"Good," he said gravely. "You should be scared. Promise me, Delaney."
"Of course I promise but…."
"No buts. Ray and I might be on opposite sides of this war, but I saw how he looked at you last week. I know he'll do what he needs to do to keep you safe."
"I don't know what you're talking about," she said, peeling her label.
"Uh huh. You're the worst liar ever," he said with a genuine laugh.
"Shut up, butt munch."
They stayed up talking for a while, catching up. Finally Danny called no joy after a long work week and headed to bed. Lane washed her face and crawled into bed with a book. It felt odd not to have Ray's warm presence beside her. Even though she'd seen him that morning, she missed him. Her phone buzzed on the night stand.
"Hello?" she answered, her voice pitched low so she didn't wake Beth next door.
"Hello, beautiful." Ray's rumbling tenor filled her ear.
"Hi, handsome. I miss you."
"You do?"
"Well, duh," she replied with a chuckle. "What did you do today?"
"Oh, this and that."
"Well, that was spectacularly evasive."
"Mmm," he agreed. "Did you have a good afternoon with Beth and Dan?"
"The best. Danny and I had a long heart to heart before he went to bed."
"And how did that go?"
"About like you'd expect," she said around a yawn. "I'll tell you about it tomorrow night. Know what?"
"What, sweetheart?"
"I feel empty, lying here without you."
"Me too, babe. I promise I'll hold you all night tomorrow. Deal?"
"Deal. Miss your face."
"Miss yours more. Goodnight, Laney."
"Night, Ray."
She laid there, phone cradled to her chest, staring at the wall until she finally drifted off.
X X X
They'd worked all night putting the finishing touches on the Cruz case. Ultimately they'd lost her, but Liz felt good about the case they'd built against her. If she ever surfaced again, she'd go down hard. Liz leaned back in her chair with a deep sigh.
"Me too," Ressler quipped. He looked as exhausted as she felt.
"I think I'm going to sleep the entire day," she said around a yawn.
"Better hold off on that dream, Agent Keen," Aram said, poking his head in the door. "Director Cooper wants to see you."
"Ohhh, so close," Ress said, standing and pulling on his jacket.
"I think he meant both of us."
"Yeah, no. This is all you, champ. But I'll think of you when I'm climbing into bed in twenty-seven minutes."
"I'm just going to leave that alone," Liz said with a laugh.
"You always do. Too bad, really," Ress teased with a winning grin.
"Go home, Ress. You're delirious."
"Sweet dreams, Keen," he said with a wink before the elevator closed around him. With an eye roll, she made her way to Cooper's office.
"You wanted to see me?" she asked at his open door, drawing his attention away from the case file. He motioned for her to shut the door.
"I thought you should know, Mason Carlton's going to be charged in the murder of Hernando Cruz."
"We lost her," Liz said with a deep sigh.
"Yes. And we will find her," Cooper assured her. "What matters now is the innocent people she framed are going to be set free."
Liz managed a small smile and a nod but she was still upset that they'd lost the collar. When she turned, her eyes fell on Cooper's cane setting against a hutch. She touched it with a genuine smile and turned back to him.
"This. Here. You. There. You have no idea how happy that makes me," she said honestly. Cooper smiled with silent understanding. Not wanting to make him uncomfortable, she turned to leave.
"I wonder what his angle is?" he asked as she opened the door.
"Sir?"
"Reddington. Why give us this case? What's his interest in this Cruz woman?"
"I'm not sure, sir," Liz said. He was right. It was odd when she thought about it.
"Ah, well. Get some sleep, Agent Keen."
She smiled at that and went to gather her stuff. She had a missed call from Tom. Pulling on her coat, she took the elevator up to her car before hitting redial.
"What?" she asked when he answered.
"I need to see you. You wanted the truth? I'll give it to you."
"Tom…."
"Just meet me, Liz," he cajoled. "I'll send you the address."
Within moments of their disconnect, her text message buzzed with an address. She had to admit, she was curious. Where had he gotten government issued passports? They hadn't been fakes and legit passports on the black market were hard to come by. She pulled into an industrial area. She felt like any number of snuff films could have been filmed here. At least she was fairly certain Tom wasn't going to kill her. Not yet anyway. She pounded on the metal door.
"What is this place?" she asked, entering when he popped the door.
"Reddington."
"Tom, what are you still doing here?"
"I've been thinking about what you said. About needing to tell you the truth." His hand clenched and unclenched and he looked apprehensive. "So I'm going to tell you the truth."
"I don't understand," she whispered, her heart pounding.
"The passports. The passports came from Reddington," he whispered. The buzzing began in her ears. "Liz there's more."