A/N
Another author's note, at the beginning. That can only mean one thing. A song to get the full experience of what I write. This one will be marked with * and the song is Demi Lovato - Wildfire.
"You're so lucky I didn't kill you." My friends begin to pull me from the pub, calling my name to get my attention. "Stick to your bitch Potter!" I call out, seeing as he is holding her up. "If I get my hands on her again, she'll be dead."
It's the last thing I say before I am pulled outside, away from everyone.
It's been a little over a month, since the fight I had with the bitch. Within that time span, I found myself more relaxed. Things finally seemed to go better for me. James and Sasha did officially become a couple a little over three weeks ago. I was heartbroken, an emotional wreck that thought life had officially ended for her. The day I found out, I will most definitely not forget.
Unlike my usual self, I found that I don't want to spend as much time with my friends as I used to. I stayed away from everything that had to do with the cause of my heartbreak. It is foolish to blame my friends for his actions, but everything reminded me of him. Every word that was spoken, I could imagine coming from Potter's lips. Every couple I saw, I imagined them to be us, me and him; but also them, him and her.
Dominique and Lucy noticed, picked up on the fact that I was distancing myself from our shortened group. They understand. At least they told me they do. It is hard to imagine that I may not find my way back to my friends; the ones that I could have gone and talked with about anything - any secret that I had. But me fancying Potter is not a secret anymore. Everyone knows - knows that I harboured feelings for Potter, which he doesn't reciprocate. I am now the pathetic girl that was left with a broken heart and feelings she couldn't give.
Life dragged on since that moment. I learned to ignore the looks, the whispers and the fingers, everyone seemed to point in my direction. Luckily, it all calmed down. I am able to walk down the halls without all of what I mentioned.
"Hey." I break from my stupor when Isabelle walks into the room. Unlike my life, hers seemed to only get better. Hayden and she broke things off, finally realizing that their agreement isn't what they are looking for. In fact, their agreement had been called off almost two years ago. Isabelle fell for someone she met on her holidays in Europe.
"Hey." I don't bother to move from my bed. I notice Isabelle scrambling in front of me, searching for something. "Looking for something?"
"Yes." She picks up a piece of parchment. "I was going to write Benedetto a letter."
Against the inner turmoil in my mind, I smile. "Wow," I start. "You really seem to like him."
"It's," she smiles. "I can't describe it. He just makes me really happy."
I smile again, genuinely happy for my friend. Waving the paper in her hand, Isabelle turns to leave. Quickly, before I lose my bravery, I call out.
"Isabelle?"
The currently pink haired girl turns around. "Yes?" She questions.
Rather than saying anything, I pet the spot next to me on the bed. Slowly, she walks back to where I sit, placing her stuff on the bed side table.
"Can I ask you something?" I whisper softly. "It's personal, so I won't be mad, if you decide not to answer."
Attentive, she looks at me from the corner of her eyes. "Is everything alright, Vienna?"
Honestly? No. Nothing is alright. And everyone is able to see that by just giving me a simple glance. I shake my head. It's now or never! "What you had with Hayden." She hums, facing me completely. "How was it? What does it feel like; sex with no attachments?"
"It was," she stops to search for proper words. "In the beginning it was liberating. We both knew that we didn't see each other like lovers do. We made that clear. It helped to get everything off my shoulders. When I was angry, sex was the answer to cool off. When I needed someone, to feel like someone cared for me, Hayden made sure to let me know. But it didn't mean anything. Hayden could have just used me for his own needs. There is no truth behind those actions. Nothing was genuine. We just - it didn't feel right. And I regretted it almost every time."
I nod, going over her words. Biting down on my lower lip, I tilt my head and sigh. "Is there a reason why you're asking me this?" I open my mouth but Isabelle seems to know what I want to say next. "Are you sure that this is what you want? You're still a virgin Vienna. Shouldn't your first time be with someone that means a lot to you?"
"But you said it yourself. Angry, sad, it helps."
"But is that really the answer to your problems. I know that things have been hard with Potter and your friends. But going and doing reckless things will not solve this."
"They'll make things a little easier." I bite on my lip again. "And that's all I'm asking for right now." We fall into a comfortable silence. "You won't be mad, right? If I ask him."
"He's my friend. You can do whatever you want. But please think about this. I don't want you to hate yourself more than you do, already."
Isabelle stands from my bed and continues on her way. I sit and stare into empty space. There is only one way to find out. Standing from my bed, I sort out my uniform. I have to do this.
With my head held high, I walk down the stair case and into the common room. I am met by blue and silver colours. Statues and books alike cover the walls. Isabelle is nowhere to be seen. I am happy for it. The boy I am looking for, is seated on the couch, lounging on it as he and his friends jest with one another. Hesitant, I walk towards the group of laughing males. A few of them notice me right away. He, on the other hand, since he is not facing me, doesn't.
"Hayden?" I call out, playing with the sleeves of my shirt.
Hayden turns around smiling. The confidence I felt months and seconds ago is gone, not available. My mouth feels dry. My lips stick to one another. "Enna." He calls cheerfully. "What do I owe this pleasure, babe?"
I try to focus on his dark eyes. "Can - can I talk you?" I look at his friends and back to him, stuttering with my words. "In private?"
"Sure." He nods and stands from his position on the sofa. Unlike me, he is dressed in casual attire. A singlet and dark jeans. Taking my hand, Hayden leads me towards the boys' stair case.
I follow silently as we ascend the stair case, the many steps and enter the seventh year boys' dorm room. Fortunately, it is empty. We walk to his bed and I sit down.
"It's surprisingly clean in here." I mention, avoiding his eyes.
"Is that what you wanted to talk about, Enna?" He laughs, somewhat easing my bundle of nerves. "About how clean it is?"
"No." I shake my head, nervously biting on my lip. "I- I," Just do it!
"Is everything alright?" He seems sincere. I let him sit on the bed, pushing him slowly against the headboard. One of his legs is stretched on the bed. The other dangles from the surface.
"I'm going to try something." I scoot closer. "I just - I'm just going to wing it."
I lean forward to kiss him. His lips are soft of mine. At first, we stop in our position. Only seconds later, I notice his lips moving on mine. It is a whirlwind of emotions. Much like the first time, Hayden manages to drive me crazy. Confidently, I crawl in his lap, placing each my leg on one of his side. His hands trail along my arse, squeezing the cheeks, pulling me closer.
"Vee." My nickname rolls off his tongue. I shake my head, not wanting him to talk. All I want is his lips on mine, his need bringing me release.
We continue to snog. Sometime in the process, I have managed to pull off the singlet the boy was wearing. With his pants long gone, it is going to be a surprise of what he is going to do with me. I lay on my back, enjoying the way, his lips trail along my collarbone, sucking, licking and teasing as he moves south. Slowly, Hayden pushes down my skirt, leaving me in my lace panties. He stops to admire his view. With strong hands, he rips open my blouse, sending the buttons all over the place. His lips cover me from head to toe, while his hands can't seem to stop travelling. They squeeze me, scratch me.
"Vienna." Our wild kisses turn softer. With his body supported above me, he stops. He is painfully digging into my lower half, his growing need leaving me wanting to feel more. Slow pecks, he places on my lips, stopping all together.
"I think I'm taking you up on your offer." I whisper against him, pulling him to kiss me once again.
On Tuesday, I sit early in our DADA class. Lucy and Dominique are with me. But we do not sit together. Instead we switched seats. I keep my face straight forward, fearing that I might break down in tears, if I look at one of them.
"You sitting with us again?" Isabelle and Hayden greet me from either side.
"Yes." I nod my head, smiling at the two. "I hope you don't mind."
The two take their seats on either side of me. They both smile. "Never."
The class starts with Professor Presidium entering the room. Without wasting time, he calls out the two names that are going into the simulation. The two boys walk forward, taking their seats on the thrones. I drown the noises out.
"He came to talk to me." Isabelle whispers in my ear. Looking past me, she makes sure that Hayden doesn't notice. "He asked if I was okay with all of this."
"Oh." I bit down on my lip again. "Are you?"
"This isn't my decision to make Vienna." She sounds concerned. "If you think that this is the best for you, then so be it. I just wanted to ask you, if this is what you really want."
"I don't know." I give in to my confusion. "I don't know what I want. Part of me screams at me. But the larger portion knows that this will help."
Isabelle nods, turning back to her letters. "If that's what your heart is telling you."
I smile sadly. Little does she know that my heart stopped talking to me a long time ago. This is all my mind, my moral and my stomach.
Defence Against the Dark Arts finishes with the two boys waking from their simulation. The bell rings, dismissing us from the subject. I stand from my seat, placing all my belongings in my bag.
"Sit with me during lunch?" Hayden questions, taking my hand in his. I nod, causing him to smile. Placing a kiss on my cheek, he then walks backwards, pulling our hands along until they separate. "I'll be waiting." He smirks and leaves.
I watch after him, ignoring the stares my friends are shooting me. Finally, I decide to look back to them. Dominique and I make eye contact for the first time in weeks. Our friendship is thinning, weakening as the distance grows. We smile sadly. But that's about it. We part ways and go our own ways.
I find myself walking towards the Great Hall as soon as Potions end. Freddie and I have almost finished our potion; the essay I have already written for us. Freddie and I did not exchange a word in that class. He didn't get in my way, which I was thankful for. I didn't want to work with him - didn't want to hear of what he had to say about him. Hurriedly, my feet carry me to the hall. Most of the students have already gathered.
I notice Isabelle right away at the table. Her pink hair is the only thing I see in the mess of blue and black. I walk to sit next to her and the rest of the group. Not that I expected any different but they are a nice bunch. They did welcome me with open arms.
"Hey." I greet them, sliding in to sit next to Hayden, on the bench.
"Babe." He pulls me into his lap, hugging me to his muscular form. His whiskers scratch against my cheek, his fingers dance on my waist. For the first time in a while, I giggle, jerking in his lap. Teasingly, I notice Hayden's hands crawling to tickle me again.
"Stop." I gather them in mine, turning to face him. My beach waves fall over my shoulder, hiding us partially from everyone else. "I'm ticklish." I smile down at him, releasing his hands to play with the necklaces around his neck.
"You have a beautiful laugh." I lean in to place a tender kiss on his lips. "And killer legs." I laugh again, remembering his words from a month ago.
"Idiot." After another kiss, I turn back around. Hayden's hands are gathered in mine again. I play with his fingers as he nestles his chin into the crook of my neck.
Professor Beetle stands in front of the podium. She taps her wand against the side of the statue before placing it to her throat.
"Hello my dears." She greets everyone with a warm smile. "Excuse the change of plans but seeing as my music class has started a little project, I thought that I might share what they did with everyone. My class worked in groups of three to four. Each of those groups has picked a topic from a hat. With the topic in their hands and a list of potential songs, I sent them on their way to create their very own music videos; videos that I will grade and use as their NEWT marks. To make this a little more interesting, I came up with the idea of letting you choose, who the best video is by. Whoever that may be, will automatically get an O written down." My brows furrow in confusion. Unintentionally, my eyes meet Roxanne's. But as soon as it happens, it ends.
"Without further ado, we will proceed with the first group. I present you, Hair." With a wave of her wand, the room darkens. A large projector appears in front of the double doors. Everyone turns around to see Anna, Amelie and Annabelle starting their video.
Their song is an up-tempo one. I smile in Hayden's lap and find myself singing with the girls. They truly did an amazing job on writing their own song and directing the video. Much like the lyrics reveal, the girls are in a salon, getting their hair cut after a bad break up. The boy I am sitting on, smiles up at me. I laugh and continue to dance in his lap, singing loudly, not caring that people can hear me.
"He was just a dick and I knew it." I kiss him.
Hayden laughs, hushing me with a sustaining kiss. "You're going to get dick, tonight." He winks playfully, kissing me again. "Don't you worry, babe."
We finish another two videos before Beetle announces the two last ones. "Before we reach the end, we are going to see Proof."
The video begins with heavy guitar riffs and drum beats. Hearing the familiar beat, I move to it. Already knowing the song, I sing with Isabelle, turning to look at her.
"You know this song?" I turn back around to see the trio play their instruments.
I nod my head yes. "Yeah." I smile, singing the lyrics. "Isabelle played it to me, after you finished recording it. I got to admit though, seeing you play that guitar is hot." I bite down on my lip, bringing my face closer to his.
"Yeah?" I nod as our noses rub against one another. I tease him, distancing myself a bit from him before I lean in again. I smile into the kiss, running my tongue over his lip ring. Taking the snap back from his head, I place it on my own. We miss the rest of the video but the loud cheers tell us that it has finished and now my group was the last to perform.
Hayden and I separate, breathing hard. "I wanna see this; you in your short skirt."
"The last video for this project. Here goes, Why Try." Shocked, I look at the professor.
The video starts slowly, snippets of the original video playing in what seems to be a memory sequence. Confused, I look to the Gryffindor table. Music starts to play, soft drums beat and my voice sounds in the hall. Roxanne is showing the video we recorded after our original one was done. I sit in a bedroom, looking back to a messy bed and sheets. Frustrated, I sing, pull on my hair as my emotions run wild. The pictures change. Potter, shirtless, is throwing his fists against a punching bag. The play of me standing and destroying the room and Potter punching continues.
We reach the bridge. The pictures are fading, distorting. With an explosion, I am sharp again. I smile with tears in my eyes. I look happy, in love. So does Potter in his scene. He smiles against the bag, hugging it to his sweaty form. The video ends, with me lying in the bed, ripped pillows and feathers all around me. I laugh into my curled hand. The picture goes black.
* Later that day, I ready myself to meet up with Hayden. I am nervous, a bundle of damaged nerves and emotions. Thoughts are running wild in my mind, not letting me think properly. Freshly shaven, I pull new underwear over my silk like legs. Isabelle decided to stay with the rest of her friends.
Nervously, I slip on the heels I want to wear. It is late in the night. The majority of Hogwarts is already asleep, enjoying their slumber. After a final check, I grab my wand and begin to walk out the dorm and common room. My legs are shaking all the way to the prefects bathroom. Several times, I had to stop in the hallway and think if this is what I truly want. Determined and confident, I walk up to the door, knocking the rhythm Hayden came up with. The door opens with a soft groan. The Ravenclaw emerges in his white, unbuttoned shirt, body and underwear on display. I let my gaze travel along the smooth, but blemished skin.
"Hey." He smiles softly, pulling me into the bathroom. The door locks behind me with a soft click. But I don't care too much. In front of me, I see the wave of lit candles. Thousand little lights adorn the room, while soft yet erotic music plays in the background.
"Wha-" I turn around to face him. "Did you do this?" Hayden nods his head, biting down on his lip. He steps closer to me, still managing to hover over my form. His naked feet smack against the ground. Muscular arms pull me closer, explore my covered body. We greet each other with a kiss; a long and heated embrace that leaves me breathless.
"You shouldn't have." I pull away, looking around the room again.
Pulling his shirt from his body, I watch as it drops to the ground. On the way there, I can't ignore the heat rising within his underwear. "You're still new to this. I'm only trying to make this as comfortable for you as I can."
I smile at his concern. "Still."
He shakes his head. "Let me." His arms reach out to grasp my shirt in his hands. Slowly, he unwinds every button, sliding the shirt over my shoulders. The material brushes past my legs, licking at the exposed skin. His hands continue to cup my breasts. "Turn around."
His hands lead me, make me follow every order, disregarding how little it may be. Hayden presses a sweet kiss against my shoulder. "The water should still be warm." One of my bra straps slips off my shoulder. For once in a while, I feel wanted, desired.
His fingers undo my bra. The clip is open, my breasts fall against my own flesh. "Step out of your heels." He whispers huskily. I do as he says, doing whatever he wishes me to do. Hayden's fingers find my underwear. His lips kiss, travel down my skin. He bends down, moving over my back and my hips. Once at my underwear, he stops. With his teeth, Hayden pulls them down. I stand naked in front of him, his chest pressing against my back, his hot breath fanning over my neck.
"Beautiful." I feel him shuffle behind me. With no place between our naked forms, he leads me into the warm water. We sit in the build in seats.
"Relax." I hear him whisper against my neck. He pulls me in his lap, slowly dipping me backwards to soak my hair in the water. "We will do this slowly." His hands wander over my neck, through the valley of my sensitive breasts, and rest against my waist.
The wet strands fall flat against my back and shoulder as I emerge back. I hover over him, my wet breasts out in the cold air. I shiver as Hayden watches me from inbetween the valley of my breasts. Excited, is what I feel. Hayden dips his own head in the water, kissing lightly on my belly and hips before he comes back up. He lowers me onto his lap, my soft mounts and back dipping into the warmth again. I am pressed flat against him. Staring into his eyes, I think of what to do next. I run my hands over his head, pushing his hair back to emphasize his beautiful face. The water erupts in small waves around us. I place my arms around his neck.
"It's beautiful." I whisper getting closer to show him my gratitude. Our lips move in perfect sync, dance with the same rhythm. We continue our game of kissing one another. The heat rises within the room. Mist and emotions make me go blind. All I can see is the boy in front of me, licking away at my soft skin. Minutes seem to pass like hours. Sweet, agonizing pain builds up in the heat between my legs.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" He stops, making sure that this is wanted by both of us.
I nod my head, pulling his lips to mine. A small mutter of a spell is whispered against my lips. Hayden nudges me between the legs, spreading them further apart. He is gentle with me, handling me with care. The pain I feel in the moment, is sharp, ripping through my abdomen. I gasp softly, digging my nails into his back. Hayden stops shortly, letting me get accustomed before he finishes the job. "Roll your hips."
The pain vanishes slowly, turning into sweet, aching pleasure as I move up and down, as My hips roll back and forth. Pleasure ignites within my body. The pain is gone and replaced with something more sinister, more exciting.
"Hayden." I feel my head dip backwards, moaning out his name. Soft, approving mewls sound from my mouth. His thrusts are hard, strong against my hips.
Low growls emit from Hayden's chest, when I run my nails over them. I leave angry scratches on the pectoral muscles, marks of pleasure. His hips pick up speed, joining mine more frequently, rocking my world even more. We kiss, messy tongues and lips caressing one another. I feel him exit my inner walls. Slowly, he drags himself out of me, piercing me afterward with unbearable force. Hayden's hands pull me to my feet. Following my actions, he stands as well. The slightly colder air nips at our skin. The Ravenclaw motions behind him. I notice a towel laid out on the tiled floor.
"Lay down." His teases me with a kiss, his need pressing against my soft walls. But instead of entering me, his lips brush over my skin. They travel south, licking, teasing, biting. Hayden's head disappears between my legs. He wraps them around his shoulders, leaning back into the water. His tongue makes me gasp, causing me to reach my hand out to grasp his hair in a tight fist. My back arches as his tongue pleases my lips, my rose bud. Tension builds up in my abdomen, clenching and clawing at my muscles. Hayden's lips place on my own again. I am able to taste myself on them; the salty, yet sweet nectar of my pleasure. His hips connect with mine in sharp, controlled motions. I rock back and forth, enjoying the pressure settling between my legs.
"Don't fight it." Hayden whispers against my neck. "Cum. For. Me."
The knot in my stomach tightens before the pressure is released. I feel my eyes roll into the back of my skull. Emotions are nothing. I lose track of time and space. Breathless, I feel my head spin, feel the adrenaline and endorphins shoot through my veins. Hayden's thrusts are fast, sloppy. Our bodies rock together. He groans, dragging moan after moan from me. My back arches, as my bundle of nerves comes undone.
"Look at me." I force my eyes to open as my mouth rips open in a silent scream. I writhe beneath him, screaming his name in a high pitched scream. Hair is stuck to my face, to my fingers. I pull on the strands, switching between doing so and digging my nails in his back. Hayden's groans are increasing in volume. His hips jerk once, twice, before a loud and deep growl rips from his throat, shaking my naked form under his.
With his climax, Hayden continues to rock into me, swaying his hips to ride me through my blissful high. With a final jerk we falter. Sweat drips from his forehead, veins are pulsating strong against his skin. He falls forward, catching himself with one hand. The other plays with my hip, drawing small patterns on the sensitive skin. His thrusts continue, soft, slow, aching.
Placing his forehead on mine, he laughs, exhausted yet ready for another round. "You sure you never done this before?"
I can't help the laugh. Shaking my head, I wipe the drops of sweat from his forehead. I pull him into a sweet kiss, moaning softly as I clench around him.
"I'm sure." I smile, not regretting my decision at all.
A/N
I'm afraid to revise this. I don't trust myself to just delete it after I see what I did. I don't usually write pornographic content, even though my best friend likes to say otherwise. And the reason for that is... Writing scenes as explicit as this, is tricky! In my opinion, you have to choose your words carefully in order to make this sound right. This can turn out trashy and messy very quickly! That's my problem with some books (50SoG). I like the idea behind it all but after rereading some passages I find that some things were just ... no, smh. Maybe it's because I read the translated version. But I didn't like what I read at all.
I hope you all like this piece of ... nerve-wrecking content. Please tell me what you think of this.
If anyone is interested in what songs I used;
Little Mix – Hair
Paramore – Proof
Ariana Grande - Why Try
Demi Lovato - Wildfire
Hint #11 G
Zilla!
I so dig that name! Ehm... Sasha's older sister and her mum... Well let me be honest, they were last minute changes! I don't have any names for them, and I probably won't mention them another time. If I do, I'll let y'all know. I hope you like this chapter.
bpaulus
Brit! I had to break my own heart for the sake of progress. James and Sasha. A couple? But hot sex for Enna and Hayden on the other hand. I guess that's good? I'm definitely a hot mess after this chapter.