Chapter 35

Less than an hour later Tae had put thoughts of revenge aside in favour of stretching out on the chaise in her quarters, the constant sunlight was an advantage to the time-stop spell that she was grateful for. As the sun warmed her skin she drifted off into a doze, the quiet of the Last Homely House a balm to her busy mind. For a while she didn't dream – but soon enough images began to flash upon her mind unbidden; her parents, her school friends, meeting Elrond for the first time. It was the sort of dream where the people and places seem to morph into one; her bedroom at home becoming her flet in Lorien, her first boyfriend turning into Elladan…

Said elf was extremely thankful that the girl was sleeping more calmly than he had seen her on previous occasions. Guiltily, he stroked her face, knowing that his touch soothed her. He had not considered the implications of her half human heritage as he'd spiked her drink with earlier. Just a couple of those triangle shaped blue pills, crushed into her drink and he'd envisaged a simple 'letting go' of her inhibitions. Tae was shy in a way elven women were not; she did not appreciate her own looks and only seemed to grow in confidence when deep in her cups. Elladan supposed that it was just as well his ploy hadn't worked. Had he thought it through he may have considered the consequences of his trickery. He had acted rashly and the fact that the girl had fainted instead of getting into bed with him had been a lucky mistake for the both of them.

Tae stirred and the Noldor elf smiled despite his guilty conscience. He would love this half elf no matter what happened. He was insightful enough to know she cared for him in return – but also the feeling that she was keeping something from him was like a bitter seed in his mind. Elladan guessed that her secrets had something to do with Serbitar, and he was loathe to think about the daemonic elf having any hold over Tae. Despite his sometimes carefree attitude, Elladan was worried about the future, about 'their' future. He sensed this was why she held back and it pained him to admit she was probably right. For if they were to begin a proper relationship and they were then separated, the coming conflict would be even more dangerous.

The scent of fresh cut flowers was what Tae first noticed when she awoke. She turned her head and sought the source of the sweet smell. A wooden vase full of wildflowers was on the table next to her and she marvelled at their delicate beauty. The daisies leaned towards her as if to get a better look and the blooms she couldn't name were dancing in the soft sunlight. There were the faintest suggestion of footsteps and Tae glanced at the doorway in time to see Elladan enter with a beaming smile upon his pale features.

"Hello" he said, drawing close enough to sit on the end of the chaise. Tae wondered if it was testament to their closeness or a sign of how predatory he was that he always sat so close to her.

"How long have I slept?" she asked mid-yawn.

"Through most of the day, you looked exhausted so I didn't want to wake you". The slightest hint of something unknown played across his features but she forgot about it as he reached out and touched her arm.

"I expect you were still over-tired from casting the spell to get us here" he suggested, stroking Tae's forearm. She shivered involuntarily and his smile swiftly became a smirk.

"Yeah… probably. What've you been doing all day then? Did you finish the clock thing?" Change of subject - safe territory.

"Aye, my lady. I left it outside for the varnish to dry, I suggest we put it there on the balcony and then we can see it from the gardens as well as our bed"

"MY bed, you mean!" She corrected him with a playful swipe of the arm and he feigned offence.

"As you wish. My quarters are just as pleasing. At least I will not be disturbed while I rest"

Tae laughed. The elf helped her to sleep and he knew it. What he didn't know was the extent to which she craved his protective presence when she did manage to sleep. She knew that whatever happened in her dreams he was right next to her and would be there when she woke up. Perhaps Tae was being lulled into a false sense of security, for she hadn't experienced any vicious dreams or visits from the wretch Serbitar since leaving Lorien.

Elladan gazed at his companion and noted with satisfaction the glow returning to her eyes. Back in her land, after those intrusive operations, she had been as pale and weak as a butterfly newly emerged from its cocoon. Though her skin still held a slightly grey pallor, he was certain the coming days in the permanent morning sun would soon restore the rich brown colour.

"How are you feeling?" he enquired, back to the matter at hand.

"A little spaced out but in a good way."

Tae sat up further and noticed with a faint flush to her cheeks that her gown had ridden up scandalously high on her thighs. He caught her look and frowned, guessing her concerns. He was a little exasperated that she would be embarrassed at the thought of him seeing so much of her bare flesh. He knew she had nothing to be ashamed of, though her apparent naivety excited him.

Thrust, parry, block. Thrust, parry, block.

The endless days passed mercifully quickly for Tae, busy as she was learning the art of the sword. The only way they knew that time had passed was by studying the water powered time piece that Elladan had fashioned on the first day. Her body ached as muscles that she wasn't sure had ever been used were tested and honed in her training. With Elladan's encouragement she had begun to show some skill with a blade. By human standards at least. Her days were occupied with endless drills and tactics discussions; Elladan had taken on his role as trainer seriously, he had begun to realise that if he did not prepare her enough she might never come back to him. Therefore a lot of the playfulness that normally coloured their relationship was replaced with a coldness that saw them spending most evenings apart, each in quiet contemplation of what lay ahead.

Tae could be forgiven for feeling neglected by him, admitting that she had begun to get used to the idea that they might spend this time getting closer, she had soon realised that it would be the wrong thing to do. She couldn't bear the idea of letting her walls down once and for all and then expecting him to let her leave for the coming battle with Serbitar and his minions. The slow dawn of realisation filled her with a strange sense of calm.

She knew what had to be done.

The idea of saying goodbye to this place was something she just didn't want to think about. Leaving those she had come to care about, to love… Tae knew she would just have to get on with it and planned on taking the cowards way out – she would slip away in the night so that she would not have to face anyone, knowing full well her resolve would falter if there was a confrontation. She just hoped that she could still rely on the offer of her enemy – her life to save the others. The half-elf would gladly sacrifice herself for the lives of the elves of Arnor, but she knew that the elves in question would go ballistic if they knew what she was planning. A small part of her entertained the idea that it would all work out, that she would have the skill to trick Serbitar into a false sense of security and kill him before he killed her.

A very small part of her.

She hadn't mentioned any of this to a soul and the stress and guilt of keeping it from Elladan and the others was eating away at her heart.

For the following weeks they could pretend that the skills she was learning were not for some greater purpose. New bruises flowered on old and pretty soon it became customary for Tae to add 'wound dressing' to her daily routine. Her hands became tougher and calloused in places where she didn't expect a weapon to affect and her back ached from the weight of the armour and the contortions her body was being forced through by her attentive tutor.

Elladan helped where he could, mixing up salves to soothe blisters and relieve pressure from aching muscles. But she flatly refused his offers of massages. What she really craved was long hot soaks and at least one night a week she set to fixing herself a bath. It was on one of these occasions, when her mind was floating on a heady steam cloud of jasmine and lavender, that she noticed the silver ring on her finger glowing faintly again. She focused her thoughts on the opalescent gem set into the silver metal and forced her magical abilities to awaken. She heard Talen's voice in her head reminding her how to complete a spell such as the one she was casting now.

Slowly at first but with increasing intensity the clear stone shone with a bright clean light. Tae felt heat course through her body as the magic began to work. No doubt if she had been looking in a mirror her eyes would have darkened by now too. Slices of images shot through her mind, first Talen, jumping out of a tree. Then, a falling leaf, spiralling in the middle of an emerald green forest. Other such glimpses of her past flashed by, the final one was a bird's eye view of herself casting the time-stop spell with Glorfindel and Elladan.

The spell concluded yet she was none the wiser. When she had practised this spell with Talen (if felt like years ago), the object she was identifying would glow and then she would see visions which centred on the purpose of the item – if any. If the ring was merely decoration she would not have had the visions, but they gave her no clue as to its purpose.

Her stomach rumbled plaintively and she hurried up her bathing to begin a slow stroll to the kitchens. She was seeing less and less of Elladan as the days wore on and she had noticed a change in his moods. When training commenced he was cold and business-like, probably advantageous after the chaos of their first few sessions of close contact work. At first the intimate aspect of teaching her the use of weapons had been like an open invitation to grope and make suggestive comments. Tae was grateful for his tuition but as her skill improved thoughts of having to use this skill in a real situation came more often. As time passed he seemed to avoid her more and more, Tae began to wonder if he was regretting asking to train her.

Most evenings they ate separately and kept out of each other's way. Tae did not say anything when he eventually began sleeping in his own quarters, she just stayed up later in the library poring over old maps and imagining interesting conversations with the statue-elves who were frozen in time around her. Now that things were becoming more serious Tae was having trouble sleeping more and more, she regularly woke in cold sweats expecting reptilian claws to tear her from the bed and rip her body asunder. Her lack of sleep and subsequent tiredness only seemed to annoy Elladan, who pushed her harder and expected more when she inevitably made mistakes.

Even after casting such a simple spell she felt weak, and by the time she made it to the kitchens she was dog-tired. The only thing that kept her awake was the need to eat, to gain strength for the next day. She assembled a quick meal of fruit, nuts and cheese and took her plate to the library – with the permanent sunshine a result of the time-stop spell; Tae had found the library to be the darkest part of the bright and airy Homely House. Even though her lids were heavy, Tae's eyes sought the comfort of the silent customers browsing the books. She settled down on a leather armchair and tried to stay awake as long as she could.

Anything to stave off the bad dreams.

Elladan sat on the bank of the river, tossing stones into the dappled light of the shallows with his slender fingers. He knew she needed him, knew she had become dependent on the comfort his proximity gave her, but he couldn't face looking at her more than he could get away with. Every time his grey eyes met hers he saw her fear and hope. Her optimistic personality and laid back nature frustrated him immensely. He would rather she be a gibbering wreck, overcome with emotion sometimes, rather that exhibit the cool, child-like innocence she advertised.

Each passing day reminded him of why they were there, why he was constantly pushing her to remember certain blocks, parries and counters. Why it vexed him that she kept forgetting how to hold a bow correctly. Cold realisation had returned to him like a winter tide destroying summers sandcastles. He would likely lose her, he knew that now. If Serbitar succeeded, if the Uruks attacked, or if a single well aimed arrow found its mark he would lose the half-elf he had set his heart upon.

He knew she needed him but his ill divined soul kept seeing her broken, twisted and bloody, at the feet of their enemies. He saw her last breath swell in her chest over and over and each time the pleading look in her eyes stung him mortally. For in these visions he could not help her, he couldn't revive her, or ease her passing – each time he was frozen in place; a horrified and reluctant spectator.

Tae's sleeping problems were not unknown to him, even though she had stopped telling him about her sleepless nights he always stayed close by. She never knew that he would be close enough for her to call him and he felt awful for not providing the comfort her soul craved. The ripples of the green clear water transfixed his eyes whilst his thoughts wandered well-trodden paths of uneasiness.

The half elf was showing ability and he inwardly thanked Eru for the fact that she was a quick learner, for a time would come when she would need every trick he had taught her. After a while Elladan rose, knowing (despite the daylight), that Tae would be settling in the library. He took a short cut through the gardens and climbed the broad steps into Imladris. Entering the library silently, the raven haired elf went to where he knew Tae would be. Unseen still, he leaned against a bookshelf and watched her attempting to fight the sleep that was trying to overcome her. Though they had not actually had a verbal argument, both were aware of the tension between them and things had got to a point where they talked only when absolutely necessary. It was a sad state of affairs, Elladan wished he could switch off his troubled mind and wrap her in his arms once more, but the truth of the situation was never far from his thoughts.

AN: I will try and conclude this story as fast as I can now as I feel crappy for never finishing it.

Deepest apologies to those of you who are actually waiting for an update.