Chapter 35: Stop!

Rose's POV

"You're a coward!" I said. "A downright coward. You should have never been placed in Gryffindor. I thought you were working to be better! He's about ready to give up and all you can do is just run away? Maybe you don't love him like you claim you do," I shouted at her.

"If I'm a coward then why are you missing the biggest day of your life?" She shot back.

"There are things far more important. You, for example, are one of them. I'm not about to let you make the worse mistake you have ever made. You're my cousin; my best friend. If you're going, I might as well, too," I said. If I was about to run away I was sure going to make her feel guilty until she made the right decision.

"You and Me"

Scorpius' birthday was today. I had brought him a necklace that was 'in' for many guys. It was a very nice necklace. I liked it a lot even if it cost me a bit.

Scorpius had told me many times not to get him anything that costs more than a knut, but it was his birthday. So of course, I had to get him something. I know he still feels a bit iffy about the whole disowned thing and how his parents cut off his money supply, but it doesn't mean that I couldn't get him anything. He's my boyfriend! I think I'm allowed to get something for my boyfriend.

Dominique was walking back with me from our last class together that day.

"So what are you doing tonight? Anything special for Scorpius' Birthday?" Dominique asked.

"I haven't really thought it all out, but he told me when I asked him that he didn't want any party or so."

"Really? I thought he loves parties," Dominique said, surprised.

"Well, he does, but I think it's because what happened last time during Gia's. I think he felt really bad. So, I think it's just us for tonight."

Dominique raised her head in acknowledgment, "Oooh, I get what you mean." What is she saying? I didn't mean anything by what I said.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Well, you said that it'll just be you two…tonight. Er, to make it special." The last word shocked me. Oh my, she meant us…us doing it?

"Oh…oh, no! I wasn't planning on that not until we're both ready," I said.

Dominique looked at me with confusion, "What do you mean when you're both ready? Did you and Brandon shag? And you didn't tell me?"

"No, I like to keep my virginity as long as possible and I believe so does Scorpius. We're going to lose it together…when we're ready." Didn't I just say that?

Dominique eyes were wide and she bit the inside of her lip. I knew she wasn't telling me right then and there. The best part about growing up with your cousins you know when they know things.

I sighed. "Spit it out. I know you know something you're not telling me."

"Well, I don't want to be the one to tell you, Rose," Dominique said.

"Dominique, now!" I ordered.

Dominique sighed, "Rose, I don't know if you knew, but Scorpius isn't a virgin." I stared at her.

"Come again?" I asked.

"Scorpius…he isn't a virgin. He and Jamie lost it together when they were going out. Jamie told me after the night it happened."

I stared at her trying to process this all in. Scorpius…wasn't…a…virgin? "Oh…"

"I'm sorry, Rose, that I had to be the one to tell you, but I thought you knew. This is why I was so angry at you when I found out you and Scorpius had gotten together. I thought Scorpius had only used Jamie to get what every bloody guy in this school wants and I thought you wanted Scorpius for your own personal enjoyment." I nodded.

"Well…I've gotta…I've got to go. I've got some planning to do for tonight."

"You're not going to like kill him in his sleep are you?" Dominique asked.

"Oh please, I'm not like Lily with her whole theory that all the Slytherins are out to get us. I always knew Blake was a drunken fool." I said walking backwards.

"If that's what you think…" Dominique said, without a care. She shrugged her shoulders and walked away.

I saw Jamie coming down the stairs and I couldn't help, but glare at her. It wasn't her fault that Scorpius didn't tell me that he lost his virginity with her, but I had wished it hadn't been her. I had wished she was more respectful of her body.

Now, I couldn't help, but picture them together; him on top of her. I almost threw up at the sight of her.

"Oh, Rose!" She cried out my name. And now, she has decency to talk to me. Stop, stop, stop, Rose, this is not her fault.

"Hey Jamie," I said.

"Are you all right? You look a bit…angry," she said.

"Oh, no. I'm just stressed out at the moment," I said.

"Oh, ok. Well, would you mind if I gave you something and you can give it to the person it's for?" She asked.

"No, I wouldn't mind."

"Great!" She said, and she dug her hand into her bag and pulled out a present, "Can you give this to Scorpius for his birthday?"

"Oh…yeah," I said, "What's in it, if you don't mind me asking?"

"Oh," her face went pink, "Just something to remind him of when we were…you know." More images!

"When you were together," I answered for her.

"Yeah…but that's way over now," she gave a shaky laugh, "Gotta move on some time, right?"

I shook my head in understanding, "Sorry, it must have been tough for you."

"Can't say it wasn't a blast!" She said, "But I'll see you around. Thanks for delivering it, Rose!" She waved and hurried off down the stairs.

I watched as Scorpius opened presents from his Slytherin friends, Al, and Jamie. I watched eagerly as Scorpius opened Jamie's present, which was a pair of boxers. Scorpius' face remained calm, but I knew perfectly well that those boxers were from the night they...they...

I didn't want to fight on his birthday. So, as planned I gave him my present. I didn't know how he would respond, but he seemed to love his necklace that he put it on. Then he said he wanted something else.

I felt my whole body go rigid wondering what else he wanted from me, but deep inside I think I knew. All I had to do was to convince myself I was ready and that everything would be fine.

He started kissing me and then all my thoughts were erased.

He was kissing me on his bed. His necklace fell down so that it touched my skin. It was cool, but it was soon out of my thoughts as Scorpius ran his hand through my thick wavy hair.

I liked it when he ran his fingers through my hair. It made me so relaxed. I also loved the way he smelled. It wasn't in that pretty boy cologne or that sweaty disgusting smell…it was just his smell that allured me so.

His other hand was around my waist holding me safely in his arms. Everything about him made me feel like I was soaring in heavenly skies. He knew exactly where to touch me and how to kiss me. It was like an addiction.

I wanted more.

I started to unbutton his front shirt. All too soon, his hand brushed it away while he still kissed me every so sweetly.

My hand went to the front of his shirt again, and he removed it once again. I pulled away.

"Why are you stopping me?" I demanded.

"What do you mean? I don't want to rush things with you, Rose," Scorpius said, leaning in to kiss me so more. I moved my head from him doing so.

"Do you not love me?" I asked.

"Rose…" Scorpius began to say.

"No, let me hear you say it. Do you love me?" I asked again. Scorpius sighed.

"Look you're upset. Tell me why you're upset," Scorpius said.

"Well, I'm upset because you didn't tell me that you and Jamie lost your virginity together. I've talked about it, how come you didn't stop me? Do you enjoy making a fool out of me?" And I'm upset now because you're having so much difficulty saying that you love me. I wanted to add that as well, but I didn't.

"I did tell you I wasn't a virgin," Scorpius said, but I don't think he was sure about that himself.

"When?" I asked shrilly.

"Before we got together. It was when you were with Longbottom. I wanted his opinion of whether we should have waited and whether she might be pregnant. You were there and I thought you heard us talking." I tried to remember. There were a couple of times when Scorpius would come over to talk to Brandon when we were in a deep conversation. One of those times might have been when I got really annoyed by it that I walked away and had hoped Brandon would follow me.

That one time he listened intently to Scorpius and didn't even realize I left. I suppose that could have been the time.

"Ok, fine, maybe you said something to Brandon and I didn't listen in, but you could have said something when I kept going off about when we could lose our virginity together."

"I was trying to, but it's hard, Rose. It's hard to tell you something that made me feel so vulnerable." I stared at him and felt a pull inside me that told me that I was pushing things with him. "And I'm not trying to push you Rose because…because it's better to wait."

Somehow I felt like that wasn't all he was telling me. I know the biggest thing with Scorpius was opening up to me and I know it's only been practically half a year since we've been going out, but I just wished he would feel comfortable around me.

"Ok," I said. Scorpius smiled and started kissing me again.

"I'm glad you understand," he said in between. But, that his words caused me more pain than satisfaction. Because I didn't understand him. I was trying to, but he kept pushing away and I didn't understand why. Have I done something?

A/N:I know. A very short chapter. But, don't be too disappointed because the next is my longest chapter yet. As for Scorpius, I want to know what you think so I'm going leave this out there for you: Do you think Scorpius is having second thoughts or not? Be careful of what you think because there's more to him than he lets on. For instance, he could be feeling bad for leading Rose on that he doesn't quite want to shag her because it will really hurt her. Or…he could just have something else in plan for her. But, of course, I can't let you know what side he is on, only that just because he saying nice things doesn't mean he isn't. I don't know. I guess you'll just have to wait and see.