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I own lots of things in life, but sadly, Twilight isn't one of them! Thanks to Katelyn for beating! A special thanks to Kim, Rhonda, and Kristen for pre-reading! Their suggestions are worth more than gold!
Meeting Myself: Epilogue: Growing Up & Starting Over
"Edward, please stop staring at your phone. They're flying and will be fine. Savannah said she'd call when they landed, and we both know she will," Bella tried to soothe, but my eyes kept darting to my phone almost like they were possessed. "Edward, I will take your phone away." Bella's voice was serious, but I looked up to see a teasing smirk.
I narrowed my eyes at her as I began calculating the distance from me to Bella to the couch that was currently in my sights. Logically, I knew Savannah would be flying for two more hours, which left me a long time to kill, so I pounced.
Bella yelped as I jumped towards her and then rolled her body onto the couch.
"Well, this is an improvement." She laughed as her hair fanned out around her head. Bella's face was glowing with a huge smile as I began to pull up her dress.
I didn't even manage to get all of our clothes off before I pressed myself into her. My jeans managed to fall off my ankles eventually, but Bella's dress stayed at her waist. Not that either one of us cared, but I found it a bit funny.
There was something strange about knowing there wasn't a protective barrier between us anymore. No more condoms, no more IUD…just me releasing myself into her and praying that together we'd make a baby. I'd had unprotected sex before, but it didn't feel like this. Knowing what our sole purpose was made it feel…I don't know, better, more emotional? I didn't know how to describe it, but it was different, and I knew Bella felt it, too.
That night, as we lay in bed together, I said my nightly prayer with my hand on her stomach. I never told Bella what I wished for every night, because I didn't want her to stress out about getting pregnant. Our time in therapy was helping, and slowly but surely I could see small changes in Bella. It was exciting, and I just hoped it wouldn't take too long.
With our jobs, we both knew the horror stories. The months of failed trying and even years in some cases, but with our age, we knew time was literally running out. We didn't schedule sex, but we were definitely more active once Savannah left with Jeremy for New York. When we weren't forced to constantly look over our shoulder, we also explored other areas of the house…my office, the kitchen counter, the back patio. I honestly felt like a teenager all over again with the way I couldn't keep my hands off of Bella, but it was fun to keep trying so spontaneously.
The week that Savannah was gone seemed to fly by. We had two deliveries, and I had a slew of patients to see. Bella was busy with her side of things, leaving us only the evenings to come together and spend any real quality time one another. Though, on our last night alone, Bella's mood seemed to shift.
"Something on your mind?" I asked casually as we cleaned up side-by-side in the bathroom.
"No, why? Is something on your mind?" Bella jumped quickly, and I narrowed my eyes in confusion.
"You just seemed to be lost in thought at dinner; I thought maybe there was something you wanted to talk about," I explained, but she shook her head. I kept eyeing her as she brushed her teeth and then her hair. I knew something was up, but I just wasn't sure what.
As we curled into bed together, I said my nightly prayer and gave Bella a kiss on her forehead. She wasn't cold, but she also wasn't acting normal, and I had no clue what to think of that. Savannah and Jeremy would be back the next night, and I hoped she would open up before then.
The next morning progressed as normal. I waved hello to Ashley as she sat at her desk. I asked her to keep my schedule light so that I could be home when Savannah and Jeremy got in, but she explained I still had one patient after lunch. She told me that the patient was incredibly paranoid and was in tears when she told her she'd have to wait until Monday. I semi-chuckled but nodded while making a mental note to refer her to Bella.
I only had four patients before lunch, and each appointment went by without much fanfare. I normally met Bella downstairs for lunch, but she texted me to let me know she was picking some stuff up for dinner that evening, so I went to my dad's office instead.
"Hey, come in," my dad greeted when I knocked on the door. "I wasn't expecting you."
"Yeah, sorry, Bella bailed on me," I explained, and he nodded.
"I see, so, how was your week? Are you ready to have them home?" my dad fired off, and I nodded.
"It'd been nice to have the house to ourselves, but yeah, I'm ready to have them back," I replied. "It's weird, I'm still not sure I'm gonna be able to handle a college drop-off next month. She grew up way too fast."
"I've done it three times, and the first time was the worst. You'll get used to it, though. How are things going with the therapist?" he asked.
"Good, I mean, Bella has handled a lot of her fears, and I've dealt with a few of my own. We seem to be in a solid place now where we know we're ready, it just has to happen, but it's still early. I mean, we only started a little over a month ago, so it could take a while." I shrugged off.
"I'm sure it'll happen. I know you worry about your age, but neither one of you are that old," he commented, and I rolled my eyes. My daughter was about to go to college…I felt ancient.
After tha,t we launched into a conversation about the hospital and some changes that were coming up. There were a few areas that were going to be undergoing renovations and some new technology popping up, so I was basically hearing about it first. When I told him I had a patient to get to, he looked confused, because I had warned him I'd be cutting out early.
"Dr. Cullen, she's in exam room 2," my nurse, Tiffany, commented as I walked down the hallway. I looked over at the door but didn't see a chart hanging outside the door. It was routine to always have the chart out so I could read it before I walked in.
"Um, where is her chart?" I asked, and Tiffany's eyes went wide.
"Oh, I'm so sorry. I must have left it in there. I can go grab it…" she stuttered and took a step to the door, but I laughed.
"It happens; I'll go in and talk to her. Thank you, I'll let you know if I need anything, okay?" I reassured her. Tiffany looked panicked, like she was in trouble, but that was odd. Obviously, I didn't like mistakes, but forgetting a chart wasn't life or death.
I took a breath before I opened the door. I expected to find exactly what Ashley had described…a paranoid first-time mom with the jitters. Instead, I found Bella. The room was decorated with green and yellow balloons and a printed banner that read: "We're Pregnant!"
Bella was smiling, but it took my brain a second to catch up as I read and re-read the letters on the wall. I gasped and brought my eyes to her. I could hear laughing behind me, and my eyes registered a few flashes, but I didn't pay it any mind as I walked over to my wife and cupped her face in my hands.
"You're pregnant," I stated, though that much was obvious.
"I'm pregnant," Bella replied back with a nod.
Without thinking, I dropped to my knees and kissed her stomach. The doctor in me knew the baby wasn't exactly a baby yet, but I just followed my instincts…Bella was pregnant. We were really going to have a baby. I could hear a few aww's from behind me, and when I rose to my feet, Bella had tears in her eyes.
"I love you so much," I whispered into her hair as I wrapped my arms around her body. "I didn't think it would happen so fast."
"Me either, but it did. Are you surprised?" she asked, and I nodded.
"Yeah, I wasn't expecting this at all, but thank you. God, Bella, if we didn't have audience right now," I murmured.
Several minutes passed before I finally let go of Bella, and my staff cleared from the doorway. As my own brain began to comprehend what had happened, the doctor in me started to come forward. I asked Bella if she wanted an ultrasound now, but she said no. We did her dating but agreed it would probably be too early to see anything, and she didn't want that to cause any stress. I agreed with her, so we decided to do a dating ultrasound in two weeks.
I was only slightly embarrassed by my reaction when we left my office and headed for the car. I earned a few laughs from Tiffany, Ashley, and Julie as we walked out, but I attempted to shrug it off.
It wasn't until we got into the car that Bella told me she picked them because they could keep a secret, and she wanted to hold off on telling the world until we were sure the baby would be okay.
"You want to keep this from Savannah?" I asked in disbelief as I pulled out of my parking spot.
"I think we should. Just until we know for sure," she explained, and I nodded.
"I guess we can try, but Savannah is really perceptive about things, so if she finds out sooner, she finds out sooner," I stated, and Bella agreed.
Of course, we both hit the ground running once we got home. Not that I was disappointed with my surprise patient, but Bella wanted dinner done by the time the kids got in the door, so I helped where I could. It wasn't much, but I did the cutting, and every few minutes I'd walk up behind her and touch Bella's stomach as she cooked.
"If you keep that up, we'll never keep this a secret," Bella teased, but I shrugged.
"You know, I didn't even ask, but how are you feeling?" I felt like an idiot for being too excited to make sure my wife was okay. I hadn't seen her get sick yet, but it also didn't mean she wasn't.
"I feel okay, maybe a little icky, but nothing major. I'm still early, though; I'm sure it's coming," she answered, and I kissed her again.
"Are you going to kiss me every five minutes for the next nine months?" she challenged with a grin.
"If I could, I would, but this," I placed my hand on her stomach. "this is the best gift you could have ever given me, so if you thought I spoiled you before, then you've seen nothing yet."
"It takes two to create a baby; I didn't do this alone," she admonished, but I shook my head.
"Perhaps, but you agreed to try. You'll go through it all, and I'll be standing by making sure nothing goes wrong," I explained, and she shrugged. "Bella, I won't let anything happen to you, or to this baby."
"You can't help everything." Bella sighed, and I knew she was right.
"True, I can't, at least not for a few months, but after that I can. I won't let what happened before happen again. I've never had a patient more important to me then now. You're my wife, and I'll move the earth to make sure everything goes okay," I stated sincerely. I made Bella look me in the eye, and she nodded. She knew it was the truth, but that didn't make the first few months any less nerve wracking. No medicine in the world would stop a miscarriage, but I hoped a couple hundred prayers would.
We finished cooking in relative silence and started to set the table right as Savannah called out.
"We're home," she hollered. Bella and I shared a knowing smile before greeting the kids at the doorway.
It still felt strange to think of Jeremy as a kid under my responsibility, but after a few phone calls to Victoria, we both agreed it was just better if he stayed with me through the summer. James was out of jail, but he never showed up or tried to contact him. He did hire a pretty harsh attorney to block Jeremy's access to his college account, but Jasper already had someone working on fixing that. Legally, he should have had control, and now it was a matter of paperwork to ensure he gained access to it. Without Savannah's knowledge, I pulled Jeremy into my office about a week after he moved in to talk about finances.
"Is something wrong?" he asked nervously as I motioned for him to take a seat.
"No, I just wanted to make sure you were settling in okay," I explained, and he nodded. I watched his shoulders relax a little bit, causing me to chuckle.
"Oh, well, yeah, I guess I'm settling in okay. I don't have any complaints," he stuttered out.
"That is good to hear. I did have some stuff to give you." I opened up my drawer and pulled out a key and a card. "The key is for the house, and this is a pre-paid Visa. I know you said you had money stashed away, but since that is for college, I'd prefer you not use that. I loaded it up with a thousand dollars, so that should work until you leave." I pushed them over to him, but he only took the key.
"Sir, um, Edward, I can't accept that. That is your money, and I'm not…look, I appreciate what you've done, not just for Savannah, but for me too, but I'm not your child, and I'm not your responsibility. I have money if I need things. I appreciate the gesture, but I wouldn't feel right taking that from you. I already plan on finding a job in Seattle, and I'll make do with what I have," he rushed out.
I was almost in disbelief that he was denying my offer…what eighteen-year-old would say no to free money?
"Jeremy," I said as I cleared my throat. "I may not be your parent, and let's be thankful for that since you're dating my daughter, but while you're under my roof, I am responsible for you. I understand that you're of age, but I've assured your mother that I will take charge of you as best as I can. This isn't charity, this is because there will be times, while you're here, that you'll need something, and I can't be here to give you cash. I understand how frustrating this all must be for you, but take it, even if you don't use it, take it. If all else fails, when your college account transfers access, you can pay me back, but for the next two months, I'd prefer you not to waste your money on things like gas and food when that now falls under me to provide."
Jeremy paled a little at first, but then took the card and put it in his wallet. The expression on his faces told me he probably wouldn't use it, but, at least I tried.
"Thank you," he muttered out quietly, and I nod. "Is there anything else?"
"No, I just wanted to thank you for abiding by my rules. I figured you both would have pushed them by now, and you haven't, and that speaks to your maturity, so thank you. I may not have liked you much in the beginning, though it wasn't you, because I wouldn't have liked anyone, but I'm glad you've stuck around," I complimented, and he nodded.
"I promised I'd follow your rules to the T, and I won't go back on that. I respect you, and I'm really thankful you are letting me stay here. Savannah, well…Savannah means…" he trailed off looking down slightly embarrassed.
"I understand; she's important to you," I prompted, even though I internally cringed.
"Exactly, she means the world to me, and I know we would have been fine if you hadn't offered me the room, but I'm really thankful that I didn't have to go. I can't pretend to understand what it's like to be a dad, but knowing she was upset would have upset me, as I imagine seeing it would have hurt you," he rattled off, and I nodded so he knew I agreed with that point. Savannah was my primary reason for offering to let Jeremy stay. If they hadn't been so close or together as long as they had been, I would have never done it, but with college around the corner and their relationship, I knew it was for the best not to split them up even if it was only geographically.
"Ya know, one day I just have this feeling you'll be more than her boyfriend in this family," I said offhandedly, and he snapped his eyes up.
Jeremy stood up with a smirk. "I don't doubt that, but when I'm ready, I'll be asking permission. My dad may suck, but my mom taught me right. That is, after college, and when I can support us as a family."
I nodded as he walked away, knowing I'd happily give it if he only grew up to be the man I could see glimpse of now. I did have to wonder how someone so respectful and honest came from James Hunte,r though…Victoria definitely has had her work cut out for her.
"You're home!" Bella squealed from my side before rushing over to hug Savannah. "Did you have fun? Tell me all about it…" she prompted as they started to walk towards the dining room.
Jeremy just stood there and laughed to himself, while I walked up to him.
"I'm assuming you had fun; how was the flight?" I asked.
"The flight was good; she slept through most of it, but it was pretty smooth. New York was incredibly, though. There was so much we missed that we definitely want to go back one day," he explained, and I nodded.
"Well, welcome home. I'm sure it'll be an adjustment, but all of the rules are still the same," I informed him.
"I know, but don't worry, I don't mind the rules too much," he mentioned, and I stopped walking.
"Really?" I asked in disbelief.
"Well, rules keep honest men honest, right?" he asked, causing me to blink.
"How old are you again?" I stuttered out in shock.
Jeremy just laughed as we walked to the dining room table for dinner. Bella and Savannah talked about the trip the entire time, while I sat back and listened. It was during dinner that I realized a shift between them. Before you could still look at them and remember they were teenagers, but now, I wasn't sure how to describe it, but they didn't act their age. Before, they would have to ask if the other wanted something, but now they just knew and did it without asking. I noticed Savannah give Jeremy glances that were subtle, but it was like they were speaking their own language. I felt like I was in a time warp because the only thing missing were rings, and that freaked me out. Savannah was really growing up, and I couldn't stop it…but, at the same time, I didn't want to stop it. I could see her future and know how happy she was going to be living it, but it meant letting go.
As dinner wore down, and they both announced they needed to unpack, I excused myself to my office. Bella, sensing my mood, came in after me.
"Edward," Bella called out from the doorway.
"She's really an adult now, isn't she?" I asked.
"Yeah, she pretty much is," Bella agreed with a sigh. She sat down on my lap after crossing the room and placed her arms around my neck. "You're still her father, and you'll never be replaceable to her, but yeah, I saw it, too."
"I don't know how to let her go. I feel like I just got her," I explained, and I could feel Bella's lips on my forehead.
"You're not letting her go, because she'll always come back. Savannah is spreading her wings and growing, and that isn't a bad thing. She deserves to grow up and find a life that makes her happy. ButI know what you saw, because I did, too. Don't let that scare you ,though. Jeremy is good for her, and she'll never want for a thing in her life if that boy has his way," Bella tried to soothe, but I still felt emotional. Today was a bit of a rollercoaster with finding out about the new baby to literally seeing my eldest fully grown up.
"I know you're right; it'll just be an adjustment. Besides, I'll keep this one small forever," I joked, but Bella slapped my shoulder.
"He or she will grow up too, but that's okay. We grew up and found happiness; we just have to wish for the same for our children," Bella whispered.
"I hate it when you're right." I put my head on her shoulder as she chuckled.
There was a knock at the door, causing Bella and I to look up to find Savannah standing there.
"Is this a bad time? It can wait," Savannah explained, but Bella stood up and told her to come over. "Sorry, Dad, do you have a second?"
"Like I'm ever too busy for you?" I teased. Savannah took a seat while Bella slipped out, and I asked her what she needed.
"Well, I know I just came back from New York, but I was wondering if you'd be opposed to letting me and Jeremy fly out like two weekends from now?" she asked nervously.
When I asked her where she wanted to go, she explained she wanted to visit her parents' gravesite before she got too busy with college. She wanted Jeremy to go with her because she wanted to introduce them, which she tried to explain away, but I understood it. So, I told her that was fine, and she could make the arrangements with her card. She feared it would put her at her budget for the month, and she didn't want to just assume.
"So, things are serious then…" I hedged.
"Dad, we've always been pretty serious," Savannah stated cautiously.
"Well, yeah, but you both seem…closer," I clarified.
Savannah turned red and looked down for a second. "I guess, I mean, New York was nice. It was weird because I felt like an adult, but it gave us more time to talk, and we talked a lot about the future. So, yeah, I guess it'd make us more serious than before."
I weighed her comments carefully in my mind. "Savannah, he didn't ask you or…"
"What? No, we're not quite that serious, though maybe in a few years. God, we're not ready to get married yet, but we did talk about it, but, in like, terms of within the next ten years," Savannah sounded panicked.
"Sorry, I just had to ask," I apologized.
"It's okay, but I'm gonna go look at airline tickets now. Do you think maybe we can do lunch tomorrow? We can catch-up and stuff. Just you, me, and The Diner?" she asked.
"I'd love nothing more," I answered before she walked out.
That night, I curled into bed with Bella. She was reading a book, but I pushed it to the side.
"Well, aren't you a bit needy this evening?" Bella joked, but I shrugged.
"I just want to hold you," I whispered while she laid her head on my chest. "How did we ever get so lucky?"
"I don't know, but I've been wondering that same thing as of late." Bella sighed as I watched her eyes close and her head go down. I continued to gently rub my arm up and down her back and said a silent prayer. Instead of asking God for a baby, I thanked him for one but prayed all would go safe and soundly over the next nine months.
So, I need some ideas for the Fandom for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. I'm leaning towards something Savannah & Jeremy, but I'll pretty much write anything...if there is something you'd like to see, tell me. To be honest, this charity is probably the nearest and dearest to my heart. When i was 3 I was not only diagnosed with Leukemia, but simultaneously Non-Hodgkin s Lymphoma as well. I underwent two years of chemo, most in the trial stages, and just celebrated 20 years of remission last month. Needless to say, I want to see this charity thrive as much as humanly possible because having a child with Leukemia and/or Lymphoma is hell, not just for the sick child, but also for the family. My step-dad lost his battle to Lymphoma when I was 17, so I've been on both ends of this spectrum-saying it sucks is putting it mildly!
I'll be working on my next epi next chapter...it'll involve a baby, then we'll be time jumping into the future, and from there, I'm done. So, if there are missing things you want to see say so now for forever hold your peace ;) Not really, but I would like to know now.
I have three plot bunnies attacking all at once, so though I do want to do The Spencer Plan next, it may be something else, but like always, keep me on author alert and you'll see it. Thank you for all the support-it means the world!
Now, for my author friends who have not heard about Emergency Team Beta's Boot Camp, I highly suggest checking it out! Everyone I know who has used this service has loved it-so, yeah, check it out at: http:/emergencybeta(dot)com/ebs-writing-boot-camp/ I plan on doing it again!
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