Chapter 12

Ricky POV

Nights and mornings are the worst, I may have worked too much over this past year but at least every morning and night I would have Amy to fall asleep and wake up to. I wake up in our bed and reach out for her almost every morning but of course my harsh reality is that she isn't there and that she may never be again. I don't know how I have screwed everything up; I only wanted to take care of them. I need to start talking to Dr. Fields again; I'm starting to feel so angry and alone. I promised myself that Amy was it for me and that I wouldn't start sleeping around again. But I'm feeling so lonely and out of control. I shake off these thoughts and decide to focus on John he is hurting over this situation.

I head over to his room "John, get up buddy. We have to eat breakfast before your big game."

I go downstairs and can smell that Mrs. Adams has started breakfast for us. I look to see John rushing down the stairs.

I scold, "Slow down John! I don't want you to fall."

Mrs. Adams says, "Good Morning John, I made your favorite, Banana Chocolate Chip Pancakes with Bacon."

He beams "Good Morning, Thank you Mrs. Adams!" She smiles and brings us some orange juice.

I say, "Feel free to join us Mrs. Adams. I appreciate all the help around here."

She smiles, "It is my pleasure Mr. Underwood. It is my job and I love this job. I ate breakfast earlier this morning but thank you for the offer."

She goes back into the kitchen to clean up. When she is finished and is about to head back to the guest house, John says with a mouthful of pancakes, "This is so good, thank you."

She laughs and John asks, "Why do we call you Mrs. Adams? Don't you have a first name?"

She says, "Yes, my name is Ruth."

John says, "Can I call you that?"

She replies, "You need to ask your father, I know my first employer didn't allow such to happen."

I say, "I don't mind at all, I would actually prefer if you called me Ricky also."

She smiles and says, "Thank you Ricky and John. Good luck at your game today! See you guys later."

We finish getting ready and head to the baseball field. They start their practice and I give John some pointers before the game starts. "Buddy, when batting relax your arms just a bit before you swing."

The game is just about to start; I'm standing right outside the dugout. John looks kind of upset or sad about something so I motion for him to come over to me. I ask, "What's wrong buddy?"

He looks around the stands and to the parking lot. He looks up at me and says, "Mommy isn't here. Do you think she forgot about my game?"

I say, "No, she will be here bud. You know your mother never misses your games."

He smiles and goes back into the dugout with the rest of the team.

I decide to call Amy; I'm a little taken back by the tone in her voice when she answers. It sounds like she has been crying.

She says, "Hello."

I say, "Hey are you okay?"

She replies, "I'm fine, I'm almost there. I will see you in a few minutes."

Amy POV

Jay has been calling and calling me since I left his place. I refuse to answer it. I keep trying to tell myself that he was just in the moment and he would never hurt me. After my call with Ricky, Jay is calling again so I decide to answer it.

"What Jay?!"

He says, "I'm so so sorry, Amy you know I would never hurt you. I just got caught up in the moment."

I reply, "You've known that I'm not ready to have a sexual relationship with you or anyone until my divorce. It felt like you were going to force yourself on me! I can't see you anymore. I don't trust you."

He says, "Be honest for once, does this have anything to do with you seeing Ricky last night? Do you want to get back with him again?"

I scoff, "I will always love Ricky but I don't think we can work out our differences. He puts work above everything! I've been trying to move on but I will not be forced into anything! You are always pushing and pushing and I can't deal with it."

Jay says, "Fine, I will give you some space. Wait for your divorce to go through and then we can see if we can continue."

I roll my eyes, "I have to go, John's game started and I'm here."

I hang up before he can say anything else. I'm still really upset, I check there mirror and try to remove any evidence that I have been crying. Once I get seated in the stands I see Ricky towards the dugout watching the game. A few minutes later he takes a seat next to me in the stands as we cheer for John.

Ricky asks, "Are you doing okay Ames? You seem kind of off."

I give a halfhearted smile, "I'm fine Ricky."

He asks, "Would you like to go for pizza after the game with us?"

I think about it for a few moments, "I don't want John to get the wrong idea about us, if we were to start doing things like that."

He lets out a frustrated sigh and says, "Amy please, maybe you and I should start going to see Dr. Fields to try to work this out. I know before I told you that I didn't have time for it but I was wrong. Nothing is more important than us being able to get through this. Please come home and we will start couples therapy."

I'm shocked that he suggested therapy; he hasn't gone to see Dr. Fields in probably a couple years. "I just…."

Before I can finish my sentence he asks, "Are you in love with Jay?"

I laugh and say, "No, I'm not."

He smiles and asks his next question, "Do you still love me?"

Surprised that he wants to have this conversation at our sons little league game, "This isn't the time to talk about this Ricky. That is quite a silly question though. Isn't it obvious that I have always loved you? That has never been our problem. Marriage takes more than just love."

He moves closer to me wrapping his arm around my waist and whispers in my ear, "I'm so sorry to have let you down this past year but I know now that nothing is worse than losing you. I want my family back together. I will do anything you want Amy."

It is so intense being this close to him, my heart is racing. I feel our surge of desire for each other. I quickly think of something to get me out of his trance. "I need to make an important call." I say as I quickly leave the stands.

Grace POV

After leaving Shane's I'm utterly heartbroken. It makes me sick thinking about him with tons of girls. I know I was no virgin but I didn't sleep with half of California. I text Adrian and Amy to see if we can do a girls lunch because I need to them. We agree to meet up after John's little league game.

A little later when we have all arrived at the restaurant, they give me some comforting hugs.

After we are seated Adrian says, "What happened Grace? Did you and Shane Break up?"

I frown, "Not yet but I walked out on him. I don't know if I can break up with him but I don't know if this changes everything."

Amy looks pissed and asks, "Did he cheat on you?"

I tell them word for word what had happened earlier.

Amy says, "I know exactly how you feel." She then says, "He was that person before you were together; all that should matter is what you have now."

Adrian says, "I agree totally. I know it sucks because it isn't aligned with the perfect image you had of him in your head. But no man is perfect!"

We all start laughing.

I can tell there is something up with Amy because she is noticeable thinking about something during this whole lunch.

Adrian finally decides to ask, "Amy, what is going on?"

Amy says, "This morning has been crazy, I'm done with Jay for good this time. I thought he was going to force himself on me this morning. He is just too controlling and pushy. Then I go to John's game and I don't know if I can even talk about the rest."

My mouth drops, "You can't say something like that and not give us the details, and we are your best friends. We tell each other everything."

Adrian replies, "Well we know it has to do with Ricky."

Amy laughs, "How are you so sure?"

Adrian replies, "Girl, with you it has always been about Ricky Underwood. Now spit it out!"

Thank you so much for all the reviews and support. I will try my hardest to update the next chapter sooner than this last one. I will post the next chapter when there is at 10+ reviews. Happy Mother's day Everyone!