'Maybe not getting any sleep wasn't so bad,' Angel thought as he bolted up in the small bed.

He ran a hand down his tired face then looked over toward his still sleeping girlfriend and let out a heavy sigh. Angel mumbled out a few soft curses to himself and then slid out of the bed, careful not to wake her up in the process, and walked over to open the window a bit. Angel looked over at Buffy once more then slid down to the floor, laying his head against the window sill, enjoying the cool air that he hoped would calm him back down.

It was about fifteen minutes later when he jerked back awake, feeling Buffy's hand softly rubbing against his shoulder. She whispered his name as he blinked his eyes a few times after settling on her face.

"Hey," she whispered with a small smile.

He threw one back. "Hey, sorry, did I wake you?"

Buffy shook her head. "You okay?"

"Yeah," he groaned out as he started to rise back up to his feet, "I just... uh... I had some trouble sleeping was all."

Buffy bit her lip, keeping herself from asking anything more not wanting to push him or anything and instead she just nodded before reaching out for his hand.

Angel smiled softly again at her, brought her hand up to his lips then followed her across the room and back into her bed, pulling her flush against him once settled.

"I missed this," she whispered and he had to agree. He saw her all of the time but it still hadn't been the same.

OoOoO

"Seriously, Linds, are you going to call me each and every day with this?" Buffy asked with a sigh.

On the other end of the line, she could hear Lindsay's slight chuckle. "Honey, I'm just trying..."

She sighed again. "I know. But seriously."

As he went silent for a moment, trying to think of the best way to word his next sentence, Buffy grabbed at her soda can while her eyes darted back at the school.

She heard Lindsey let out a sigh of his own and then he went into another reworked speech that she'd gotten quite used to over the past week. Yes, she knew what Faith had said. Yes, she knew he thought it would be a good idea to see her former best friend for both their sakes. But she still didn't know how she felt about it. It was all too confusing for her.

OoOoO

Jenny silently clapped her hands together under her desk then snuck a look over at Angel who raised an eyebrow at her while looking even more confused than he had the last time she did this. She couldn't blame him though. Hell, she had just grabbed him from lunch and brought him back to her classroom without having said a word to him. And still hadn't.

Jenny gave a tight smile then looked down at her lap, her thoughts racing. Taking several more uncomfortable moments to gather herself, she glanced over at her nephew once again and sighed. "I think you should tell her," she said quietly.

She couldn't have been more surprised by how calm her voice had came out. She was after all anything but.

It didn't help that Angel remained silent, unmoving.

Swallowing hard, she did her best to shake away some of the nerves and then tried to explain. She didn't want to upset him, but she thought it might be for the best. There was the fact of how close the two obviously were and she knew that everything he was hiding was like a black cloud hanging over him.

Then there was also everything she'd come to learn about Buffy's home situation. She thought and hoped that maybe if he shared his own experience it could help her and her family in some way if nothing else did.

After the bell rang, Angel stood up and nodded absently toward his aunt, at least he thought he had, then walked numbly over to his seat. When Buffy arrived, she raised an eyebrow at him, trying to figure out why he was staring off into space like that.

"Hey?" she greeted, settling down beside him.

Angel had a delayed reaction but did attempt to smile softly toward her. "Hey."

She smiled and laid her head down on his shoulder. "Everything okay?"

He swallowed hard and nodded. "Yeah," he whispered before leaning down to kiss her forehead. His hand came up to her chin, tipping her head back to look at her. "I love you," he told her, his voice still in a quiet whisper.

Buffy stared at him, trying to understand his tone and that look in his eyes. "I love you too," she finally replied. "You have no idea," she smiled.

"I think I might," he teased then bent to capture her lips again, breaking only when he heard Jenny beginning the class.

OoOoO

Angel laid his head down on the table and awaited Buffy to enter the library. He couldn't wait for this day to be over. It hadn't exactly been going his way.

Closing his eyes, he thought back to his earlier conversation with Jenny. Something he'd been trying to block out. But he understood where she was coming from about it all, not that it really helped, but he understood it anyway.

He'd lived through his own hell for years and knew how badly it ended. There was that small chance that maybe sharing his past would help with her future. Hell, maybe he'd just scare her enough to know how bad things can reach with no control over it if she knew. Maybe it could help.

He got that. He really did.

And he also knew that she saw it as a way to help him as well. Maybe in some cases, for some people, talking things out seemed like a positive thing to do but he didn't really seem to look at it that way when it came to himself.

Angel also knew what telling her would cost him. That was something he always knew, always dreaded. It was what made him not want to get... involved... with any of this. It was what he constantly remained worried about.

He knew he was always going to tell her. He had just wanted to wait until the last possible moment.

OoOoO

Many hours later that evening, Angel laid wide awake back beside Buffy in her small bed staring up at the ceiling. He lowered his eyes down to the sleeping girl curled against him and drank the sight before him in, wondering how many more chances to do this there would be.

"I have to tell you something real soon," he whispered. "And you're not going to like it."

Letting out a shaky breath, Angel closed his eyes and tried to think of how in the world he was going to handle all of this.