What if...
... some Atlanteans could transform into Sailor Senshi?
John tried to look not to disgruntled. He was so not recording a stupid 'educational' video for new recruits, but better than having them faint on the spot once they got here. There was only so much of absurdities a human mind could cope with before shutting down. Oh, no, not like his status was strange or ridiculous at all... Yeah, right maybe they would lose their minds for he was cool?!
Though, after all, he was a super hero all things considered…
"Hello! My name is John Sheppard, and I am 40 years old. My zodiac sign is Capricorn. I like to play golf and fly puddle jumpers, and believe it or not – I have magical powers!
One day, I saved a mysterious cat who was being hunted by some alien bullies, and she said I was chosen to fight all evil in the Pegasus galaxy. Get used to it, this is Pegasus, things like that happen all the time. She gave me a bracelet, and on saying 'Power of Atlantean crystal make up', I can transform into the mighty Sailor Sheppard. Using my special powers, I protect the city of Atlantis and it's population, keeping them save from all harm.
Oh, there are more of us! Here come my friends. That's Carson Beckett, he is a nice guy, working really hard and being the Doc round here. He might not like it, but he can also change into a Sailor! He is Sailor Beckett! And the big guy over there with the impressive hair is my friend Ronon Dex. He is really strong and doesn't even have to transform to defeat our enemies or beat you up, mind my words. Well, and all together, we are the invincible Sailor Team!! Yes!"
The camera beeped once more, and John felt he really had to give Bates some credit for not bursting out in laugher.
"Are we done here?"
"Yes Sir."
"Good. If you make any copies of this, I will kill you personally."
"Yes Sir."
The doors had barely closed, when the marine broke down, laughing so hard he had to cry.
"Lock out Sailor Ronon!!"
Sailor Sheppard showered the monster with Magic bullets, but the thing just refused to go down. Sailor Beckett was busy trying to get Zelenka into safety, so it was only the two of them against a really nasty demon.
Not even Sailor Ronon's thunder bolt punch had managed to knock the Wraith out. Just as Sailor Sheppard found himself out of bullets, starting to panic as the monster came closer and closer, a scarlet rose flew across the room, stopping the Wraith dead in his tracks. Out of the shadows, a masked woman stepped, smiling mysteriously.
"This is no way to threat such handsome young man, my friend."
Sailor Sheppard couldn't help himself but grin stupidly, and even Sailor Ronon smirked at the familiar sight.
"Thank you, Tuxedo woman! Okay now, Wraith! You asked for it! Military Moon Boot Kick!"
The demon went down with a heavy thud. Sailor Beckett returned just in time to change it back.
"Sailor Beckett, now!"
"What? Oh, aye… Retrovirus spray freeze!!"
Blue bubbles started to fill the room, and the Wraith whined in agony, transforming back into a human and releasing the energy he had stolen.
"Is he down?"
The Scott closed his eyes each time he released an attack, not even aiming properly; But as long as he actually hit the enemy, Sailor Sheppard would not address this matter or make fun of in public. Not to much.
"Yes, he is. Would you mind checking on Zelenka? We'll the ex-Wraith him into one of the cells meanwhile."
"Aye, thanks."
Sighing, Sailor Sheppard transformed back into his human form. He would never hear the end of it if MiniRadek was hurt, and he really couldn't bear ChibiKay's ranting right now.
The natives were cheering, everybody praising the braveness and power of the Sailor team, hugging them as they said good bye. Weir was pleased to see the huge amount of fruits and grains they brought back home. Carson and Ronon immediately set off to the infirmary to treat Ronon's broken arm, leaving Lorne and Sheppard alone in the gate room.
"Uhm… good job, um … Sir."
The man was a bit pale, and John remembered Lorne had been less than a week on the ancient city before this particular mission. Of course he hadn't seen the Sailor Team in action before. John couldn't blame him for staring, eyes huge like saucers.
"You okay Lorne?"
"Permission to speak free, Sir?"
"Granted Major."
"Isn't it … uncomfortable?"
Sailor Sheppard swore he heard ChibiKay laugh, maybe he awas hiding somewhere behind the consoles again. For being a future son of his, the boy really did lack respect and manners... Well, but it wasn't like Lorne didn't have a point. Whilst the knee high military boots were kinda cool - the kevlar miniskirt was really itchy, not to mention hilarious.
And the white blouse combined with the black security vest was definitely too warm when running for your life. But worst of all were these ridiculous gloves and the silver tiara. And why was he the only Sailor wearing one?
Beckett's blue and white outfit wasn't that bad - and after all he was used to wearing skirts being a Scott; And Ronon looked almost good in leather and linen. Even Tuxedo woman, whoever she was, had a decent costume.
Only he had to look like … like …. Well, like the way he did! Bimbolike! Damn, he was a commander after all! He couldn't run round playing super warrior...
"Well, if it helps to fight off the Wraith and save our collective asses, I'd say it's not so bad... And will you shut up ChibiKay!!"
ChibiKay darted out from underneath a console and ran away giggling, Lantis-P floating after him.
Teyla purred at John's feet, trying to console him, her soft brown fur brushing against his army pants. He was usually not one to dwell on things that could be changed, but the cat noticed the sad look in his eyes.
"Oh Teyla… couldn't you have chosen another air force pilot instead? You know, there are so many out there, why did it have to be me, I just want to be a ordinary pilot... nothing more."
Weir watched him retreat, and went over to pick up the cat. If he only knew he was not the only one wishing things were different on Atlantis.
"Hey, what's up little guy?"
ChibiKay sniffled loud, trying to stop the tears flowing down his face. He was angry, angry at stupid John, angry at Zelenka and Weir and everybody else.
"Go away!"
John arched an eyebrow, and sat down on the floor to be on eye level with the boy. He had not seen him this upset since Radek hat turned into the evil Master Nine and tried to get make a energy cloud named pharaoh 99 come into this world.
"So, why did you run away? Everybody was worried you know. And it was kinda rude, ChibichibiRod just tried to be nice to you…"
Hearing him sniffle even louder, everything just clicked into place. How could John have been so blind?
"Look, we all love you, and you know that. Okay, you steal candy, and annoy the hell out of us, and never listen to one thing I say – but you are also brave, kind and brilliant. You really don't think we like ChibichibiRod better than you?"
ChibiKay's bottom lip was trembling as he tried to hold back the tears.
"But … he can transform into a Sailor… and he is funny and nice, and … and … hick…he could save … hick… he could…"
John pulled the boy into a firm embrace. Sometimes he forgot what horrible memories the little guy had, who had traveled back through time to steal their sacred ZPM crystal to save his parents – him – and his friends.
"It's okay ChibiKay, it's okay… we'll make this work… I promise…"
And if he had to kill each and single Wraith with his own hands, Sailor Sheppard would not let anybody ruin his future!
"Sailor Sheppard! Please don't do this!"
"Don't worry ChibiKay, I will not die."
The control throne hummed softly, and the city generously offered him her very last reserves.
"I will end this war, for once and all. Don't be afraid."
His smiled was so friendly it made ChibiKay and Teyla panic even more. The Daedalus hovered in the Lantean orbit, waiting for the right moment to launch it's weapons to sink the run over city.
"Dad! Hermiod, beam me down again! He's gonna die! Please!"
But Atlantis was already powering up, using all her remaining strength for one last strike. The battle was going to end here and now, no more of his friends would die. He had lost Sailor Ronon and Beckett, and Tuxedo Woman; He would not let the Wraith take away any more of his precious beloved ones.
"Power of Atlantean Crystal, Make up!!"
And the world turned white around him…
"Will they remember anything?"
"No, I don't think so."
Teyla smiled, taking ChibiKay's hand. She had returned to her human form, and planned to move to the mainland with the boy to make him grow up normally.
They watched Ronon spare with John, and Carson wrap a sprained ankle; Elizabeth was working on some projects, and Radek supervised the new power control systems. And they all look very, very happy.
"Shall we go?"
"Yes. Do you think I will ever see Sailor Sheppard again?"
"Maybe, one day. I'm sure, if the evil is going to awake again in this world, Sailor Sheppard will be there to fight it."
Yes, Sailor Sheppard would return to save the world again if he was needed... or if John was dumb enough to say the magic formula out loud. But she didn't tell ChibiKay so, praying Sheppard would finally get the normal life he always longed for.
"Hey, Ronon, why do you have the same bracelet I do?"
"Hm."
"Funny, looks kinda … ancient…"
"I have noticed Beckett wearing a similar one."
"Now I'm curious. I don't even recall putting it on. Maybe Elizabeth can translate the readings for us?"
Ronon shrugged, and followed Sheppard out of the gym. What damage could be done by checking out a wristband after all?