I step out of the carriage and look up. The sky's dark. I think it might rain. I honestly can't wait. "Kara?"

I turn to Mom and smile. "What's up?"

"Wanna head straight back or grab a bite to eat first?"

I shrug, taking Rams hand and ignoring the pang of hunger. It's been a long trip back from Kararagi. "Your call. Still your birthday."

Mom rolls her eyes, smiling. "That was three days ago."

Mine grows. "Yup. Don't matter to me. I have time to make up. Plus we did agree that everything is your call til we get back to yours."

She laughs. "You're impossible. Ram, your thoughts?"

The pinkhead grins. "Most impossible. But food would not go amiss."

Mom almost cheers. "Fuck yeah! Let's go to that little place off the main square."

I chuckle. "You could have just said you were hungry. You know I'm gonna come with."

She nods. "I do. I just wanted you to admit that you were hungry."

I sigh with another chuckle. "And I'm the impossible one. Let's go."

We make our way and I review the last couple months. It's been two and a half, maybe three, since Mom and I played for everyone and it's been quiet. I've been telling Ram more about our world and she's been helping me get more to grips with my demon side. As of right now I can use it for about forty minutes and my mana use has improved. Now officially as fast as Rem in a straight race. Ram also asked me to help her with physical combat. I wasn't a huge fan of that until she made me remember the forest. I've been teaching her in our spare time and she's progressing pretty well. On the flipside, she's been teaching me some actual magic, with a little help from Rem, Lia and Puck. I know a couple of spells. One lets me summon a cloud of darkness that I can see through, the other is a fucking shadowy… slicey… blade thing. It's fucking awesome.

As for working, apart from this week, I have weekends off. I come to the capitol and spend it with Mom. I also take a couple of hours to train, having finally asked Reinhard to spar with me. Choosing not to surprise him too much, I let him know about my demon side before we crossed blades. That led to Felt dragging me to the side with questions afterwards. I've improved a hell of a lot in a short space of time, mostly down to my increase in speed and reflexes as well as a master swordsman's tutoring. In my time here I've also gotten to know Felix better. He's less of an annoyance then I thought he'd be but I still don't exactly like him. I'm getting off track a little.

This week I begged off for Moms birthday. And subsequently had to beg off for Ram after Mom insisted she come along. She said that she wanted to spend more time with 'the future daughter-in-law'. This made me almost choke. Made me think, too. And I've been thinking all week. Right now, though, food.

As is with anything good, it's finished quickly and we head to Moms. The minute we step in Ram turns to me. "I will be heading back to the mansion tonight."

I frown. "You sure?"

A nod. "I feel I should. You two should have a night to yourselves."

This is… odd. If she wants to head back, though, I can't stop her. "I'll walk you to a carriage."

Five minutes later we're walking again and I take the opportunity to ask. "So, what's wrong?"

She looks at me with a small smile. "I do not know. I just have the feeling that I am needed back at the mansion."

I frown. "Want me to come with?"

She shakes her head. "You enjoy your night. I doubt my concerns have any reason."

I just nod as we reach her ride. I kiss her before helping her aboard and watch her off. Then I head back to Moms.

About twenty minutes later I walk through the door, rain just beginning to fall as I get there. The smell of orange hits my nose and I almost freeze, looking in. Mom steps out of her bedroom in pyjamas, takes one looks at my face and grins. "Don't worry, I ate a couple while you were out. What took you so long?"

Releasing the breath I didn't know I was holding, I carry on forward and head to my own room. "Ran into Felt, said hi. Gonna throw my jacket in my bag." As soon as the real reason for my lateness is safely tucked away I head back in, sitting on the couch. "What's the plan for the night?"

Walking over to a cupboard, Mom pulls out a bottle. "Drink."

About half an hour of relaxing later, Mom grins. "So, I have a question I can't believe I ain't asked. What made you realise you were gay?"

I finish my drink as I think about it. "Don't actually think it was one specific thing, really. The most major one was a guy I was at school with. He wouldn't stop hitting on me, even after the fiftieth time I told him to fuck off. I eventually just told him I was gay, just to get him to stop."

Mom grins. "Did it work?"

I see-saw a hand. "Sort of. He started acting normally towards me but he tried on a couple occasions to set me up with his fucking sister, Jordan. I eventually caved and met her, just to keep up the idea. Told her privately about my little deception."

"What did she say?"

I chuckle. "She laughed her ass off and invited me for a coffee with a few friends. There though, that's where I realised there may be some truth to the lie. One of her friends, Sarah, was tall, blonde and a drop dead goddess. I started meeting with them more cause they were a cool group and, after a house party, I had to tell Jordan that I felt something for this girl."

Moms eyes widen. "Stop pausing, you ass! How'd she react?"

"She said Sarah'd been flirting with me for about a month, I'd just been too oblivious to see it. Jordan took me for a drink and told me what she likes. Rock music and guitarists. At this point the only people who really knew about my playing, outside of Mike, was Jordan and her brother. I decided to bring my guitar to the next party I went to, play something. I was gonna go with something simple, maybe something slow and chord heavy but decided against it on the day. Went with Cliffs of Dover. Not long after I finished she pulled me outside and we talked. Then she kissed me. Bam, definitely gay."

Mom smiles. "How long were you two together?"

"Only a couple months. We both realised that we were looking for something… different so we parted ways. We're still friends though."

She refills our glasses with a chuckle. "I haven't spoken to my first boyfriend since we split. He was a meathead jock, ditching me as soon as the head cheerleader was single." Her smile dims a little. "I… wanted to talk about something with you."

I raise a brow. "Go ahead."

Downing her drink, she refills before she starts. "I've been thinking about what you said, about putting myself out there. I think I will."

I smile broadly. "That's awesome!"

"I actually had an offer for a quiet dinner the other week. Said I'd give it some thought."

I think I know the answer to this question. "Who's the lucky bastard?"

Her grin is almost sheepish. "Roswaal. I know it's my choice but I wanted to see if you'd be ok with it. He's your boss, after all."

Smiling softly, I nod. "You're right, it's your decision. As long as he treats you right I can't object."

She beams. "I'll send a message up with you when you head back."

We talk long into the night, about everything and nothing, until Mom yawns. "Time we hit the sack. We both need to be up early."

She writes her note for Roswaal and we go to bed. I'm woken early by a really bad feeling. Something's wrong. I get my shit together, leave a note for Mom and almost sprint to a carriage.

Sitting back, I force myself to relax for the journey. I sigh, realising I'm probably being paranoid. Hell, it could just be because it's raining. But bad weather always makes me feel chilled. Am I finally going fucking crazy? I'll get to home and Ram'll be fine, everyone will be. Calm the fuck down, Kara. Three of Lugnicas best magic users are at the mansion. Hell, Roswaal is the best. They can handle anything.

I get the driver to pull up at the end of the road up to the mansion, paying and thanking before walking the last ten minutes.

I look up, casting my gaze slowly downward, as I get to the main gates and let out a huge sigh. Everthing looks fine. I think I've just been a… Oh no. Someone's lying face down. Throwing my bag off I run over, bitching myself out over not coming back with Ram. Oh shit, it's Rem!

Dropping to my knees next to her, I just… stare for a second. She's a crumpled fucking mess, lying face down. I turn her as carefully as I can, her broken limbs creaking as I do. Her eyes are still open but her skin is pale and cold. Don't need to be a doctor to know there's nothing I can do. My mind has a flash of Lucy. I'm too late again!

A noise draws me away from my inevitable breakdown. My head snaps up to the sound to see a shape on the steps to the door. Sprinting over, I stop next to the maid, dropping and laying a hand on her arm as she stirs. She's bleeding heavily from a wound to her chest and lets out another feeble groan at the contact. I need to find out who did this. I need to find Ram. "Yumi? Yumi, it's Takara. You're gonna be fine but I need to know who's doing this."

Her voice is so low that I can barely hear. "C-cult."

I have to take a second to berate myself again. Of course it's those fucks. There could be more survivors. Shit, that means I have to leave Yumi. I have to check. "Yumi, I'm going to be right back. I gotta see if anyone else is still alive, then I'll be right here. Hold on."

I spring to my feet and move quietly onto the mansion, drawing a dagger. I move as fast as I dare, checking any bodies I come across. I'm losing my Gods damned mind right now. I need to find Ram, even if she's…. No. No, she's going to be fine. She got out. Then I see a flash of pink hair.

I stop, dagger falling from my hand. Walking over I drop next to Ram. Don't even need to touch her to know I can't do a thing. She looks almost untouched, almost like she just lay down for a nap, but the waxy pallor of her skin tells the truth. Cupping her cheek, I lean over and kiss her forehead. She's so cold. I wipe away my tears from her face and sit back. "I'm sorry. I should have been here. I should have been fighting beside you. I should have been… But I was too late again. I never got to ask you…"

Suddenly there's a voice to my right, snapping me back to reality. "I told you, there's another one. She's usually with those twin bitches."

Two men come into view and I lose it. Before I realise what I've done I run toward them. "AL FULA!" The one on the left drops, head falling from his neck, and I grab the other by the throat and slam him into the wall. Taking my second dagger in hand I plunge it into his stomach over and over. The second the light in his eyes fades I realise what I've just done. I release him and take a step back as he falls, almost tripping on his companion. I just killed two people.

I lean back against a wall, dropping my blade, and just stare at what I've done. I just killed two people! My hands shake and my legs give way, making me slide down onto my ass. Ok, Kara. You had to. They would have done the same to you. Did I though? I could have hidden or just disabled them. I just killed two people! What the fuck am I supposed to feel right now? They were part of the group that killed everyone here. They killed Ram. That should make it better, right? But it doesn't. I just killed two people. Tears spring from my eyes. They weren't expecting me, weren't expecting something so fast or strong to attack them. I break down and cry hard for several minutes, everything piling up. Out of nowhere two thoughts hit. There may be more of them here and I need to see if anyone has survived. I haven't seen Lia or Roswaal yet.

Forcing myself up, and my emotions aside, I retrieve my dagger and start deeper into the mansion, repeating 'them or me' over and over. I know one thing. Even if I find anyone else, I'm going to find a way to reset. I need to stop this from happening. I just hope I'll get back to a time that'll give me enough to actually pull it off.

I'm almost at Lia's room when a sudden cold stops me. I look at the door the feeling's coming from. Magic maybe? One way to find out. I go to open it and wrench my hand back. Holy fuck, the handle's so cold it burns! Quickly ripping my jacket off, I cover my hand with it and open the door. My world goes cold and white.

Feedback, suggestions and criticisms welcome, as always. See y'all next time.