37.) Cabin Fever - written by Corli and Kel
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The second chapter concerning the Student Council of Elrond weekend retreat - the sophomore class officers move into their cabin at the retreat.
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"Thank you, Hydrangea," Professor Halfelven said as the girl swept up her long skirts and sat back down on the floor. Glancing down at his clipboard, the Professor announced, "So the speeches at long last are complete. Now is the time for everyone to settle into their cabins and get some rest in anticipation for the busy weekend ahead. Each class has been assigned their own cabin in order to facilitate class bonding. Thus the cabin assignments are as follows: freshman class - Cherry, sophomore class - Willow, junior class - Elm, and senior class - Mallorn."
The students all staggered to their feet, stretching their legs as they began to collect their belongings. When the students had arrived at the camp, they'd all piled out of the bus and dragged their luggage into the large dining hall with them. After dinner, the students had reassembled in the rustic meeting hall for the student speeches. This hall was up a narrow winding path through the woods, so only a few of the students had bothered to lug their bags with them. During the speeches, however, the camp staff had moved the remaining baggage up to the meeting hall, dumping it in a disorganized mess by the door.
So now, as the other students sorted through the chaos of suitcases, backpacks, and sleeping bags, attempting to find all their belongings, Legolas breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that he'd only brought his small backpack, which he'd made sure to keep with him all evening.
Feeling no need to wait inside for his fellow students, Legolas stepped outside into the cool, clear night. He took a deep breath, soaking in the woodland aroma. It almost feels like home.
Almost...
"Leggy, can you give me a hand with my bags?" Arwen asked, kicking her heavy duffel out the door in front of her as she struggled with her sleeping bag and backpack.
"Yes, LEGGY, help the girl," Gimli teased, stepping past Arwen onto the porch.
Legolas grimaced at the sound of Gimli using that despised nickname, but he quickly complied with Arwen's request, throwing her heavy duffel over his shoulder. "What all did you pack?" he asked, amazed at how heavy it was.
"Only necessities, I'm sure," Boromir teased, stepping out of the way of an exiting group of chattering hobbits.
But Arwen didn't hear for she was too busy fighting with her cellphone. She slammed it closed angrily, complaining, "I can't believe there's no reception up here!"
Boromir shook his head, smiling. "I'm sure the TriChi's can survive two whole days without you."
"I wasn't calling the TriChis," Arwen said coolly, sweeping grandly past Boromir.
Legolas could only imagine whom she'd been calling, and he imagined that Aragorn might enjoy a weekend free from interruptions.
Frodo emerged from the meeting hall and stepped to the edge of the porch. Squinting out into the darkness, he asked, "Willow Cabin - is it left or right?"
"Right," Legolas said, having studied the camp's map upon arrival and remembering that Willow was the cabin furthest from the meeting hall.
And furthest from the toilets.
...
"This is all of us," Boromir announced, looking around at the sophomores now assembled on the porch.
"Then what are we waiting for?" Gimli asked, hoisting his army surplus duffel and leading the way into the darkness.
And darkness it was. Once they were away from the lights of the meeting hall, the path became shadowed and foreboding, blocking out the twinkling of stars and the dim light of the slivered moon. Gimli shivered - it wasn't only the darkness that unnerved him but the trees themselves. He somehow felt like they were watching him. Listening.
Legolas must've read his thoughts for he suddenly pronounced, "This forest is old. Very old. Full of memory."
"Yeah, the memory of decades of Student Council retreats," Boromir joked.
Gimli suddenly crashed into something, or someONE, in the darkness, and he recognized the resulting gasp as Arwen's.
"Sorry," he grumbled, embarrassed. "I didn't see you. I can't see a bloody thing in this dismal forest."
Suddenly a light appeared in front of him, glowing dimly at first and then growing to a bright light.
"What IS that?" Boromir asked, staring in amazement at the hobbit from whom the light seemed to originate.
Frodo held it aloft, and the company could see the light shining through a glass phial. "It was a gift," he explained. "To be a light in the darkness, when all other lights have gone out."
"The lights have certainly gone out here," Gimli said, thankful that Frodo's light was illuminating the gnarled roots crossing the path. Of course, the light did nothing to dispel the earthy smell in the dwarf's nose or the uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach from the knowledge that they were currently surrounded by tall, strong, LIVING beings.
Suddenly Gimli felt something strike him upon the head, and he jumped, startled, dropping his duffel and instantly taking a defensive stance. "Show yourself!" he growled menacingly, looking around anxiously.
"I feel safer," Legolas said drily, "knowing you're here to protect us from falling acorns."
As the others laughed, Gimli sputtered, trying to think of a retort, but none came.
...
But Frodo knew how Gimli felt - he felt jumpy himself, here in the dark woods. Of course, the fact that he was exhausted didn't help either. He'd spent a busy week singlehandedly running the Activities Week table for The Ring in addition to attending all his classes. And the bus ride up into the mountains had made him queasy, so the hobbit hadn't eaten much dinner and now was starving. Frodo couldn't wait to get to the cabin so he could break into the snacks he'd packed in his bag.
The group passed Cherry cabin, where the freshman representatives were eagerly chattering as they checked in for the night.
"Look at them," Boromir said. "They look so YOUNG."
"Young?" Arwen asked coolly. "WE were freshman just last year."
Gimli nodded. "But we weren't that LOUD."
Frodo glanced at the group and smiled - three of the five freshman representatives were hobbits. "They're not loud because they're freshmen," Frodo explained. "They're loud because they're hobbits."
Legolas raised an eyebrow. "YOU don't seem that loud."
Frodo smiled to himself, thinking of his last trip to the karaoke bar with Merry, Pippin, and Sam. "That's because you don't know me that well."
"Well THAT'S what this weekend is for," Boromir said, patting Frodo on the back. "To give us all a chance to get to know each other."
"Or at least each other's sleeping habits," Arwen said. "I do hope everyone brought their pyjamas." Frodo and the others all turned to look at her and she quickly added, "It's not that I'm a prude or anything, but I don't think my boyfriend would be happy to know that I'm the only girl in a cabin full of naked guys."
"I promise -I- won't tell," Legolas said drily, and Frodo saw Arwen smile back at her fellow elf, amused.
Gimli, however, didn't recognize the joke. "Of course you shouldn't tell," he sputtered. "None of us should. I mean...she...Arwen... she's a lady...and if she doesn't want us to...I mean, we should be considerate of..."
...
Arwen smiled at the dwarf's sweetness and decided it would be kinder to just cut him off. "It's okay, Gimli. I know you won't tell." She smiled at Legolas as she added, "It's only the elf I have to worry about."
"Hey, what's that?" Frodo suddenly asked, holding his phial of light up towards what appeared to be a small cabin but with two doors instead of one.
"It's the toilets," Boromir said as two girls walked through one of the doors, exposing doored stalls inside.
Thank goodness, Arwen thought, breathing a sigh of relief. She had completely forgotten to ask her father if the camp had indoor plumbing. He was famous, both on-campus and off, for inflicting hardships on others, so she was relieved that there were actual gender-separate toilet facilities available for the weekend.
The group continued to walk up the dark wooded path, passing first the Mallorn cabin and then the Elm.
"How much further is it?" Gimli asked, obviously eager to set down his heavy duffel.
"Ours is the last cabin," Legolas said, pointing ahead into the darkness.
"It's secluded," Frodo observed.
Boromir patted Frodo on the back, teasing, "Well, then, I guess our little hobbit can be as loud as he wants."
Arwen smiled to herself. Maybe Boromir wasn't so bad. As long as he's not getting in my way when I'm trying to do what I want.
The company finally reached the door to their secluded cabin, and Frodo went in first, holding the phial up so that the others could see the room as they piled in. The cabin was square, with the door in one corner and a set of bunkbeds in each of the other three corners. A small pile of firewood lay on the wooden floor next to the door, and in the center of the room was a glass stove, its metal chimney pipe disappearing up into the middle of the ceiling.
"It's freezing in here," Frodo said, shivering from the cold and causing the phial of light to shake.
"That's because the windows are all open," Boromir said, dropping his pack and quickly shutting the three windows.
"This is perfect," Gimli said, walking over to the bunkbed that was cattycorner to the door. "Only one short bed, and our group has exactly one dwarf and one hobbit." Gimli placed his duffel on the ground next to the shortened bunkbed and sat on the lower bunk. Looking across the room at Frodo, he said, "I guess that makes you and me bunkmates for the weekend."
Arwen noticed that Legolas had already unceremoniously dropped her duffel bag onto the floor and climbed up to the top bunk of the bed nearest the door.
Boromir must've seen the same thing for he said, "I guess the elves can share that one, and I'll take THIS bed," he said, hoisting his bag onto the other top bunk.
"That was easy," Arwen said, walking over and sitting down on the bunk below Legolas.
Frodo was standing at the end of the short bunkbed, looking warily at the footboard ladder up to the top bunk. Arwen saw him shiver as he repeated, "It's still freezing in here."
"Then let's get a fire going," Gimli said, heading over to the pile of firewood near the door.
"You guys go ahead and get it started," Boromir said, heading for the door himself. "I've gotta go take a leak."
...
Once outside, Boromir suddenly felt embarrassed that he'd been so crass in front of Arwen.
But what does it matter? Boromir thought to himself. She already thinks I'm an overbearing, chauvinistic, bumbling fool of a human, so she might as well add "rude" to that list.
Boromir hurried back along the darkened trail towards the toilets, regretting that he no longer had Frodo's phial to light the way. The toilet cabin, however, seemed to be glowing from the seams, and Boromir realized that it had electric lights inside. Not exactly my idea of "roughing it", he thought with a grin, but I'm not complaining.
He rushed inside, thankful to finally be relieving his bladder. He then quickly washed his hands and headed back up the wooded path.
As Willow cabin came into sight, he saw his fellow classmates standing outside in a huddled mass around Frodo's phial.
"What's going on?" Boromir asked as he approached.
"Something's wrong with the flue," Legolas said matter-of-factly as Boromir opened the door and smoke came billowing out of the cabin. Coughing and blinking the smoke from his eyes, Boromir hurried inside, opening up all the windows he'd just closed in order to allow the smoke out. Legolas then joined him inside, and the two of them sought to clear the flue.
"Perhaps that's why the windows were open in the first place," Frodo observed as he and the others returned inside the smoky cabin.
"Ow!" Boromir said, pulling a burnt finger away from the metal chimney.
"Are you okay?" Legolas asked.
Boromir nodded as Arwen said, "I brought some aloe vera cream, if you'd like some."
For once Boromir was glad Arwen was such a girly-girl. "That'd be great," he said, sucking on his finger.
"There," Legolas said, finally finding the lever that opened the flue. The flame inside the round glass stove flared up, casting a wavering light throughout the room.
"I guess we don't need THIS anymore," Frodo said, tucking his phial away.
Boromir looked around at the motley crew settled about the cabin. "I guess we should all get to sleep then," he said. "We've got a big day ahead of us tomorrow."
...
Legolas climbed up onto his bunk and started to unpack his backpack. He'd spent all summer with the Rangers, sleeping out under the trees, but now that he'd become accustomed once again to his dorm bed, it felt weird to be sleeping in such an exposed cabin.
Especially with people he hardly knew.
He glanced over at Gimli, who seemed to be settling in nicely to his cave-like lower bunk. The same could not be said for Frodo, however, who would've looked decidedly nonhobbit-like sitting atop the high bunkbed were it not for the carrot he was munching away on. Legolas smiled to himself - leave it to a hobbit to pack plenty of extra food.
Meanwhile, Legolas heard Arwen rustling through her bags in the bunk below. After a few minutes she headed for the door, a bundle of clothes and cosmetics bags in her arms.
"I'm going to change in the bathroom," she announced pointedly. "I'll be about ten minutes."
"Was that a hint?" Boromir asked as the door closed behind her.
"I think she wants us to change while she's gone," Gimli said, quickly pulling a large "Harley" t-shirt out of his duffel and starting to put it on.
Legolas grinned with amusement. "YOU don't sleep with a shirt on," he pointed out.
"I do THIS weekend," Gimli said. "And YOU better, too. You heard what she said about her boyfriend."
Legolas just smiled, bemused by Gimli's sudden modesty.
"Gimli's right," Boromir agreed. "We should respect her wishes and make sure we're all dressed appropriately for bed before she returns. After all, we don't want her father storming in here in the morning and accusing us of anything unseemly."
Legolas said nothing, merely pealing off his shirt and lying back on his bunk, his backpack a makeshift pillow beneath his head. He knew that Arwen was far from the prude she was portraying herself to be, and he assumed it was just another of Arwen's subtly manipulative techniques to get her own way and gain power.
And it's working, he realized as he watched the other three boys frantically trying to meet her ten-minute deadline.
...
Frodo felt much better after his carrot, and now he quickly got into his nightshirt, not wanting to be caught undressed when Arwen returned. Once it was on, he pulled a can of Pringles out of his pack and started munching on them.
"What've you got there, laddie?" Gimli asked, looking up at the hobbit on the bunk above him.
"Podado chibs," Frodo said, his mouth full. Swallowing, he added, "Want some?" cautiously reaching over the edge of the high bed and offering the can down to Gimli.
"Aye!" Gimli enthused. "After those long speeches and boring meetings, I could do with a snack about now." He accepted the can, taking a handful of chips before passing it back up to Frodo.
"Anyone else want some?" Frodo asked, holding the can aloft, happily munching on chips.
Before anyone had a chance to answer, there was a knock at the door.
"All right, boys," Arwen called from outside the door, "your ten minutes are up. I'm coming in."
The sight that greeted them when Arwen opened the door was hardly what Frodo expected. Arwen wore baggy plaid flannel pyjamas, her long brown hair plaited into a neat braid. Frodo had imagined designer satin pyjamas, in a feminine shade of pink, and perhaps curlers in her hair and a clay mask on her face. Without make-up and in her worn flannels, Arwen looked positively masculine.
Evidently Frodo wasn't the only one who was intrigued. "What're you all looking at?" Arwen asked innocently.
"Nothing!" responded Boromir, Gimli, and Frodo simultaneously.
Frodo saw Legolas rolling his eyes but couldn't hear the elf's thoughts: Only a few hours, and she already has them in the palm of her hand.
Frodo gulped nervously and held the Pringles can out towards Arwen. "Um - would you like some, Arwen?"
...
Arwen turned from her bag where she'd been putting away her clothes to see what the hobbit was offering her. "Oh, no thanks - I'm not a big fan of barbeque flavour." She then pulled a ziploc out of a side pouch, offering, "But I've got some lembas if anyone wants-"
"Yes, please!" Legolas interrupted, rolling over and holding out his hand greedily.
Arwen grinned at the barechested elf. "Nice nightshirt," she teased as she broke off a piece of waybread and handed it up to him. She hadn't expected him to fall for her innocence routine, but she hoped his blatant disregard of her requests wouldn't affect what she hoped to accomplish.
"I'd like a little, too, if I could," Boromir said, walking across the room.
Arwen raised an eyebrow at him. "YOU like lembas?"
Boromir nodded as Arwen broke off a small piece for him. "There's an elf on the crew team who brings lembas every morning, and I've really grown to like it."
"Crew team, huh?" Arwen was impressed. Unlike Aragorn's fencing, crew actually required teamwork and dedication. Maybe Boromir WAS someone she could work with on Council.
"It's way too early for me," Gimli grumbled. "I don't know how you manage to get up at five every morning."
Boromir shrugged, jumping up onto his top bunk. "You get used to it. Even my little brother is starting to look less weary at practice."
"You have a brother?" Frodo asked, intrigued.
Boromir nodded in the dim light of the flickering fire. "He's a freshman. And I think the crew teams' gonna be really good for him. He tends to be a bit of a loner and gets too absorbed with his own thoughts, so I think it'll be good for him to relate to others."
Arwen noticed Frodo shifting uncomfortably on his bunk and imagined that he must be a bit of a loner himself.
But it was Legolas who spoke up: "There's nothing wrong with being a loner."
"I didn't say there was," Boromir quickly backtracked. "I just worry about my brother, that's all. He has..." he paused briefly before finishing, "...a lot of shit to deal with."
Arwen was surprised and impressed with Boromir's compassion for his brother. She was about to ask him another question about his brother when he quickly began a new topic.
"So, I think we should play a round of 'Would You Rather' before we all fall asleep."
...
Gimli was surprised at the sudden change of subject. "What's 'Would You Rather'?"
"You know," Boromir said, leaning over the side of his bunk so he could speak to Gimli, "it's that game where you think up two scenarios, and everyone has to choose between them."
"You mean like 'Would you rather listen to boring speeches for hours or inhale copious amounts of smoke'?" Legolas asked dryly.
Boromir, however, didn't seem to notice the sarcasm. "That's the sort of thing, but that one's not very interesting. How about something like 'Would you rather be burnt alive...or drown'?"
"Burnt alive!" Frodo practically shouted.
Gimli shook his head. "Are you sure about that, laddie? After all, I've heard that the flames can-"
"Burnt alive," Frodo repeated with such vehemence that it silenced the dwarf.
After a few moments of stillness, Legolas quietly asked, "Who drowned?"
"What do you mean?" Boromir asked.
Legolas propped himself up on his elbow and looked across the room through the flickering firelight to Frodo. "It was someone close to you, wasn't it?"
Frodo nodded, clearly not wanting to share, and the room descended into an uncomfortable silence.
Finally, Gimli ventured a tentative, "I'm sorry, laddie. Did your...loss happen recently?"
Frodo shook his head. "It was over seven years ago. My...my parents drowned on the river when I was in junior high. That's why I went to live with my Uncle Bilbo."
"Professor Baggins is your uncle?" Arwen asked quietly. "I guess I never made that connection before."
The room again grew still - Frodo had just shared such an intimate detail about his life that it didn't seem right to continue with the light-hearted game.
But finally it was Frodo himself who continued it, "How about this one: 'Would you rather eat maggoty bread or...a live wriggling fish?"
"I LIKE sushi," Arwen said.
"He didn't just say RAW," Boromir pointed out, "he said WRIGGLING."
"Yes. And?" Arwen asked.
Frodo laughed. "How about YOU, Boromir?"
"I'm not sure. They're both pretty gross."
"I'm with Arwen on this one," Gimli said. "I'd take fish over maggots any day."
Legolas shook his head. "I think I'd take NOTHING, if those were my choices."
Boromir laughed. "No wonder you're so thin."
"He's an elf," Gimli grumbled. "What do you expect?"
"-I- expect he'd prefer to hike over a mountain in a blizzard than to crawl through a cave full of skeletons," Arwen suggested. "Am I right?"
Legolas nodded in the dim firelight. "I'd prefer MOST THINGS to spelunking."
"Not me," Gimli said. "Give me a cave any day."
"What about you, Frodo?" Arwen asked. "Blizzard or cave?"
"Well, being a hobbit, I think I'd have to go with the cave."
"Why would being a hobbit make a difference?" Boromir asked, confused.
"Waist-high snow to you is more like shoulder-high to me," Frodo explained.
Boromir laughed. "I guess so. I never thought about the disadvantages of being small before."
"Oh, I don't know," Frodo said. "There are advantages, too. It's often very useful to get lost in a crowd."
Legolas laughed. "I wouldn't mind being able to do that sometimes."
"If it were up to you," Arwen teased her bunkmate above her, "you'd never even BE in a crowd."
Gimli chuckled. "Don't like being around other people much, do you?"
"No, I simply enjoy spending time in places that haven't been spoiled by settlement, enjoying nature," Legolas explained.
"Well, nature is all well and good," Boromir agreed, "but personally I'm fond of civilization. Without it, there'd be no ale."
"And life without ale would be downright dreary," Gimli agreed.
...
"If I could only have one food for the rest of my life? That's easy. Lembas. Cherry-flavoured lembas. No question about it."
...
"I KNEW Professor Grey must like pipeweed - there's no WAY anybody could design those fireworks sober."
...
"'As the Leaves Turn' is a really cool show, but did you ever notice that the leaves never turn? They're always yellow."
...
"Whoa, that's weird. What the hell IS Goofy?"
...
"That's just an old gaffer's tale - there CAN'T be spiders that big."
"There ARE!" Legolas insisted. "I don't know if they exist around here or not, but they did serious damage to Mirkwood a few years back."
"But their structure wouldn't support their weight," Frodo continued. "It's physically impossible for a spider to be that big."
"Well, you can tell her that when she's spinning you into her web."
Boromir was surprised to be witnessing such an intense discussion between the two Quiet Ones and quickly jumped in. "What do YOU say, Arwen? Has your father ever mentioned any giant spiders around here before?"
Arwen shrugged. "Local legend says there's one living in a tunnel near here, though I don't know anyone who's actually seen it."
"You mean anyone who's lived to tell the tale," Gimli said, chuckling at his own joke.
"But our hike tomorrow afternoon DOES lead us near there," Arwen continued. "Perhaps a small detour is in order."
"Detour all you want," Legolas said adamantly, "but I'm not going anywhere NEAR that tunnel!"
"One thing we should keep in mind, laddies...oh, and lass!..." Gimli quickly added when he remembered Arwen's presence, "is that what Legolas may be calling a GIANT spider may not be that big. After all, he screamed like a girl when there was just a wee spider in our dorm room the other day."
The others all laughed as Legolas tried to defend his honour. "It wasn't THAT wee," he insisted. "It had at LEAST an inch legspan!"
The dwarf demonstrated by holding up his thumb and forefinger only slightly apart to indicate the size of the spider, and Boromir stifled a chuckle. He felt a little guilty for laughing at Legolas's arachnophobia, but it made him feel a little better to know that even the seemingly-perfect elf had fears. Made him seem more human.
Boromir glanced at his wristwatch. "Whoa - it's late!" he exclaimed. "We should probably get some sleep. We have a busy day tomorrow...whether we see any giant spiders or not."
"We WON'T," Frodo said authoritatively as he laid his head on his pillow.
"But if we do, Legolas," Gimli said with a grin, "don't worry. I'm sure Frodo will protect you."
The others laughed as Legolas grumbled and rolled over, pulling his discarded shirt over his bare shoulders like a blanket.
...