A Mother's Love
Chapter 38
The next Sunday dawned and it was rainy and even a bit chilly. It matched Mike and Christine's mood perfectly. They both laid in bed, staring at the ceiling for at least a half hour. They could hear the girls moving around downstairs and talking but neither of them knew what to say or what to do that day. Lizzie had really been looking forward to Father's Day and had planned a huge breakfast for Mike. She had asked Christine for help on Mike's favorite recipes and Christine didn't have the heart to tell her that Mike would be in no mood to eat or celebrate. She knew Mike would go along with everything just to make the girls feel better but he was having an incredibly hard day. They heard the girls making their way up the steps and Mike quickly wiped the tears off his cheeks and tried to compose himself.
Lizzie and Adalyn carried in the food trays while Hannah carried in Mike's present, the pictures the girls had done and Lizzie's handwritten(with Christine's help) note. Christine felt and heard Mike take a deep breath and saw the fake smile he plastered on his face. Her heart was breaking for him. Lizzie sit his breakfast tray in front of him and bent down and gave him a kiss. Mike returned the kiss and then gave Adalyn and Hannah a hug. As Christine suspected, he clung to Hannah and even pulled her down to sit next to him. Hannah seemed to understand and cuddled up next to Mike.
"Thanks for the breakfast, girls. It's delicious." Mike was picking at his breakfast and didn't seem the least bit interested in it. Christine clasped his hand under the blanket and squeezed it. She could only pray that Mike could get through one of the most difficult days of his life and keep up the act. She understood why he was putting on a show for the girls but it also wouldn't be the end of the world if he cracked.
"Daddy, I drew you a picture. I even put the babies on it even though we don't know what they look like."
"I love it. Thank you, sweetheart." Mike bent down and kissed the top of Hannah's head. Christine glanced over at the picture and her heart broke just a bit more. While Mike, herself, and the three girls and the babies were in the picture, Addy and Lucas were absent. Hannah had generally drawn them as angels in the sky. She hadn't even done that and Christine knew Mike would notice it.
"Dad, Mom told me that when you started training, you would need heavier thermal socks and I know how to knit so I made you a couple pairs."
"Thanks Adalyn. They're great. I will definitely use them." Mike gave Adalyn a hug and kiss and she sit next to Hannah on the bed. Lizzie looked like she was going to explode with excitement.
"I didn't make you anything. I just wrote a card. Mom helped me but I did it all on my own. The handwriting isn't very good though."
"It's perfect, thank you, Lizzie. Let me read it."
"Dad,
Thank you so much for everything you had have done for me. No one else ever did all this.
I love you,
Elizabeth Faith Slattery"
"Thanks, sweetie, I love you too. Handwriting is better than my own."
Lizzie leaned over Christine to give Mike a hug. She was positively glowing from his compliment and the girls were full of chatter. Mike spoke when spoken to, struggled to eat the breakfast that Lizzie had worked so hard on and managed to keep his emotions at bay. Christine also felt pretty emotional but knew that Mike was really struggling. The girls finally took the breakfast dishes downstairs, leaving Mike and Christine alone.
"Babe, just let it out. I know you're having trouble and I know you think you have to be strong. It's okay not to be okay. You don't have to be strong today or around me."
"I…I honestly don't know what to think. I know I have it good. A beautiful wife who I love more every day, three amazing girls who give me a thousand reasons to laugh and smile, I have these three babies who I already love more than life itself but I just want Addy and Lucas back. Addy is who made me a dad and she isn't here and Lucas was so young. Why? I don't even feel like a dad anymore."
"I wish I had an answer for you, Mike. Just because Addy isn't here, doesn't mean you aren't a dad. You are a dad to Lizzie. That girl has never had anyone that has ever loved her the way you and I do. She's never had anyone to believe in her, fight for her, pray for her, teach her or just simply be there for her. That makes you a dad. Adalyn, who has a had a good dad and knows what it's about could choose to just bide her time, and take what we offer to her. Instead she has become an integral part of our family. She knows we don't always have an easy time looking at her because of her resemblance to our Addy but she has forged a new place in our hearts with her beautiful personality, her upbeat spirit and the way she loves us. Hannah, that little girl has such an amazing little heart. She knows that you have struggled with your relationship with her and the last week; she's making a point to not only be your daughter but also to be your friend. Taya, Tess and Liam, they haven't met you and you haven't held them; but I know as soon as you do, you will be just as an amazing daddy to them. Every time they hear your voice, they start kicking. They don't know you but they already love you so much. And me? I knew the first time I saw you with Addy, and then when Hannah decided to like you and then again when Lucas was born, that you were exactly the man that I wanted to share my life with. I fell even more in love with you when I told you my fears concerning being pregnant after White raped me. I refused to have an abortion or put the baby up for adoption if I did get pregnant. You immediately said you would help me, you would raise that baby and love that baby. No questions asked, you committed yourself to a child. Thankfully, I didn't get pregnant from that rape but I knew that if I did, I would have an excellent support system just with you. No, the timing with the triplets wasn't perfect but you have still embraced it. Most men would have run away when they've been faced with what you've been faced with. This parenting thing is hard; it's heartbreaking, and at times maddening. This grief thing? God, it's hard and we both would rather just stay in this room all day and cry ourselves into headaches but we can't do that…well, I could but it's not a good idea. Mike, I can't think of a more perfect partner to do this parenting thing with or this grieving thing with. Lucas and Addy would not want us to feel like this. They would tell you to get up, get dressed and go downstairs and take the girls fishing. That is what you can do for them."
"I love you."
"I love you more. Now, I did neglect to give you your Father's Day present from me, the babies, those three girls downstairs, Addy and Lucas. And it's from all of us. Let me turn over, it's in my nightstand."
"I'll get it."
"Jewelry box."
"Okay." Mike wiped his tears off, gave Christine a kiss, opened the drawer and got the box out. He opened and his jaw dropped. It was a bracelet like band for his wrist, simple silver with several birthstones. Addy and Lucas's were in the center with his and Christine's on either side. On one side of the band was Adalyn, Lizzie and Hannah's birthstones, and on the other side was three birthstones, signifying the triplets. They would be born in August and so there were three peridots. It was surprisingly masculine and had taken his breath away.
"I don't know how it will fit into regulations for you for the Navy but I knew you would want to wear it all the time. I spoke with Carol to insure that the triplet's birth would be in August. She has scheduled the C-section for August 25th. And Amy is who made it. She is apprenticing with a jeweler so it actually got her credit too. I told her what I wanted and she made it. I didn't figure you would care about that. It was in my price range."
"It's absolutely beautiful. Can you put it on?"
"Sure. Probably not very masculine."
"I love it. I was just thinking that it was masculine. I love how Addy and Lucas's birthstones are between yours and mine. We need to get one made for you."
"Actually, I spoke to Amy; I just want the extra stones added to my ring. I need one for Adalyn and then the three for the triplets. I've gained enough weight back that I need to get it resized anyway so she's going to just wait until after the babies are born."
"Okay. I noticed you had been wearing your rings on that chain."
"Do you mind? My fingers are pretty swollen."
"Not in the least. Remember, I knocked you up."
"Yes, you did. And it was enjoyable."
"Just enjoyable? I distinctly remember you thanking me, telling me how amazing I was and begging me to do more?"
"Talk about ego. It was amazing. And I don't know what to say about your forgetfulness that night. It has given us triplets."
"You made it amazing and you kind of hurried me. You can be a bit demanding at times."
"In this case, I don't think you mind. Can you help me downstairs?"
"I suppose. You going up and down those steps worry me. You okay? Rough day for you too?"
"Mike, I don't think either of us is okay but I need to be downstairs. Around you and the girls. I know the girls want to fish but I can hang out on the front porch and put my feet up. I can't stay in here."
"Alright, if you're sure? "
"I am. At least the weather is clearing so you can get your fishing day with your girls."
"Yeah. Except Lizzie and Hannah hate the worms and refuse to touch the fish. At least Adalyn doesn't mind it."
"She grew up on a farm."
"Yeah. It makes a difference. Need help with you clothes?"
"You are so romantic. No. Its maternity yoga pants and one of your t-shirts. Thank God you're so big."
"Or that despite being pregnant with triplets, you're still tiny?"
"I don't think I can be described as tiny. Just short. And my short little legs are tired of this belly."
"You alright?"
"Yep. Just very pregnant. Would you feel up to giving me a foot rub tonight? I know it's a bad day but…"
"If it would help you, I'd give you one right now. You are having just as bad of a day. She was your daughter too."
"Just tired, Mike. Really, honestly has nothing to do with Addy or Lucas."
"Okay. What else?"
"You are too sweet. Maybe take the girls and go get some chocolate later. My toenails could probably use a touch up and my legs need to be shaved. You can say no though."
"And a bath? I know you said you didn't want to attempt that while you were still pregnant but it might help. I'll even throw in a back rub."
"Only if you get in with me?"
"Well, yes. That's the only way I would agree to it. A bath with my beautiful wife. Who am I to pass that up?"
"Phase two of the Father's Day gift?"
"Yep. Although I would do it regardless."
"I know. Let's get downstairs so you can spend some time with your girls. I'll keep my phone on me so I can text you if I need something."
"Okay. Easy, does it."
"Once, we get downstairs, would it be too much to ask for some iced sweet tea? It is kind of your day."
"I'll get you a pitcher and glass for the porch. And it maybe Father's Day but I wouldn't be a dad if it wasn't for you."
"Same goes for me. I wouldn't be a mom if it wasn't for you. Woo-hoo, I'm downstairs officially! Now back to the back deck."
"Yep. Hey, Lizzie, do you have any of the iced tea made up? Mom wants some sweet iced tea."
"Yeah. I'll bring her a glass. Do you want some?"
"Just bring a glass and pitcher of it. You girls and I are going fishing. Mom's hanging out on the back deck."
"Okay."
Mike got Christine settled on the back covered deck. Thankfully it was screened in and had fans so she wouldn't get too hot and it gave her a perfect view of the pond. Lizzie brought out the iced tea on a tray with cheese, grapes, strawberries, apple slices and crackers. The young girl was nothing short of amazing.
"Dad, if I need to I can stay up here with Mom?"
"Nope, Lizzie. Dad needs time with his girls and that includes you. I appreciate you wanting to but it's your Dad's day. This tray of food looks delicious but do we have any chocolate."
"I knew I was forgetting something. Be right back."
"Mike, can you find me a book?"
"Yep, that was my next thing. Here's your phone. Use it. It's a bit warm in here."
"It's a change of scene. My feet up, this excellent tray of food, a good book, watching my handsome husband fishing with our girls and feeling these babies kicking. It's almost like Mother's Day all over again."
"You are too easy to please. Every day should be like this for you."
"Brownie points, Mike? Banking them up again?"
"Yeah, here's Lizzie. And what is Hannah wearing? A dress to go fishing in? I'll be right back."
Lizzie and Christine both started laughing when they saw Hannah's pretty pink dress through the window. Mike had walked her up to her bedroom to find some more suitable clothes and Adalyn came outside laughing.
"Hannah wanted to look pretty for Father's Day. Dad told her that while she looked beautiful, she needed to look messy for Father's Day. Somehow, I figure she'll still manage to incorporate pink something into her outfit."
"She has always been like that. During kindergarten, she refused to wear pants to school. It was dresses every day. The only problem was that sometimes she isn't very ladylike. I learned really quickly that she needed to wear leggings too."
"Uh oh. This sounds like an interesting story."
"She was playing on the jungle gym and had somehow hung herself off it by her feet. You can imagine what her dress did. Her teacher called me and told me that I could get leggings at the Target three for ten bucks. I went immediately. Got a pair in every color so Hannah wouldn't throw a fit about them not matching."
"She is a clothes horse. Adalyn and I share clothes but Hannah is still small. I think her heart broke when you told her Dad was taking her school shopping."
"Yeah, I just can't do it before the babies get here. I may see if Carol or Grace will help."
"There they are. Hannah looks mad and Dad looks upset."
"Girls, can you go inside for a minute. I'll figure out what's going on."
Both girls walked back into the house and Hannah rushed out, mad as a wet hen. She sit down next to Christine on the chair and crossed her arms. Mike had stopped to talk to Adalyn and Lizzie before coming outside. Christine could tell by his body language and the tone of his voice that he was upset and Hannah was completely sullen. He finally came outside and Christine could tell he was fighting back tears.
"What happened?"
"Daddy won't let me wear my sandals out there. He's being mean."
"Hannah, I told you, I'd rather you wore a pair of tennis shoes. There are bugs and all sorts of things. I want your feet to have some protection."
"I don't want to go out there."
"Hannah, I told you that this is Father's Day and your dad decides what he wants to do. Lizzie doesn't like fishing either but she's going out there with your dad. It won't hurt you to go out and spend some time with your daddy."
"I don't want to."
"Chrissy, don't worry about it. I'll just take the two older girls out. When Hannah's calmed down, I'll find something for the two of us to do."
"Mike, you really wanted to go fishing with all three girls. You've looked forward to it all week."
"I don't want to go out later with Daddy either. He's being mean and stupid and I hate him."
"HANNAH! Go to your room now!" Christine smacked her on the behind hard and pushed her to the door. Mike had an absolutely stricken look on his face and honestly looked like he might dissolve into tears. He tried to catch Hannah as she ran by but she punched him on the stomach and then went inside. Adalyn and Lizzie were in the kitchen nook and looked absolutely horrified. Adalyn followed Hannah up the stairs but Lizzie looked a little lost and finally came outside. Mike had sat down on one of the chairs and had just closed his eyes. The tears were rolling down his cheeks and both Christine and Lizzie could hear him sobbing into his hand. Christine stood up and hugged Mike close. Lizzie still looked totally lost but she knelt down in front of Mike and took both his hands in hers. Christine decided to just let Lizzie do the talking.
"Dad, Hannah doesn't really feel like that. She loves you. You're her buddy."
"Mike, she's right. I know today is a bad day for all of us but Hannah doesn't really think that." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Adalyn bound down the steps and run towards the deck. Christine was immediately worried.
"She fell. She was tryin' to get something off the top shelf of her closet and the chair tipped. I tried to stop her but she hit her head and her arms looks strange. She woke up but she fell back asleep. I…"
Mike immediately jumped up and ran into the house. Christine made her way into the house, followed by both the girls. She could hear Mike upstairs but she knew she couldn't get up the steps by herself. She had never been so scared. About three minutes later, Mike carried Hannah down the steps. Fortunately she was conscious and seemed semi alert. There was blood all over her face and her arm was at an odd angle. Christine knew immediately that it was broken but she fixated on Hannah's face. Thankfully the little girl wasn't fighting Mike, and was even leaning into his shoulder a little. He had blood all over his shirt and still looked emotional.
"Chrissy, I need to get her to the hospital. I think she has a concussion and that arm is definitely broken. I know you want to go with, but you can't be on your feet like that."
"I know. Hannah, you listen to me. You listen to everything your daddy says. I know you're hurting but I can't be there. It has to be your daddy. Mike, I'll call Carol and have her meet you. Take Adalyn with you. Just call me when you can, please?"
"I will. Don't try and go up those stairs until I get home. I don't think they'll do surgery so we should be home by tonight. Lizzie, will you be okay?"
"Yeah, we'll be okay and I'll keep Mom downstairs. Sorry your Father's Day got messed up so bad. I really wanted it to be special for you, Dad."
"It was. Not your fault. Adalyn, you ready to go? Hannah, do you need anything?"
"No."
"Let's go, Dad."
"Alright, Adalyn, I need you to sit in the backseat with her and keep her talking. She can't go to sleep. Chrissy, I'll call you. I love you."
"Love you, too. Hannah, remember what I said. I love you."
"I want Mommy."
"Mike, you'd better just go."
Mike bent down and gave her a kiss and Christine gave Hannah a kiss on the cheek. She wasn't resisting Mike holding her but she was clearly not happy with it. Mike was handling her very tenderly but Christine could see the pain on his face. Thankfully Adalyn seemed like she was in pretty well in control of things and nodded at Christine. She knew that Adalyn would take care of Hannah if she didn't allow Mike to do it.
They left and Christine called Carol. Thankfully, she was already in the E.R. and would wait on Hannah. She instructed Christine to sit down and that she would take care of Hannah, Mike and Adalyn. Carol understood that Christine hated not being there and didn't judge Hannah's meltdown or Mike's reaction.
Christine and Lizzie spent the afternoon working on Lizzie's reading. She was working on a new book and wanted to read it to Mike to make him feel better. Christine worried all afternoon but knew that Hannah was in good hands. Despite the pain that Hannah had caused, Mike still adored her and would make the best medical decisions he could for her. Finally, around suppertime, Mike called.
"We're being discharged. Hannah's arm was broken but they don't think she needs surgery. Of course they're sending the X-Rays to an orthopedic specialist that Carol knows. For now it's casted past her elbow. The break is more a fracture just below her elbow. No concussion either, but she hates stitches and she hates me just a bit more."
"She doesn't hate you, Mike. Why on the stitches?"
"I held her down so Carol could stitch it. She didn't have the skin deadened quite enough and Hannah walloped me pretty good. I have a black eye. Cast got me. It's actually kind of humorous."
"If you say so. But Hannah doesn't hate you, Mike."
"Well, she said it again so maybe she does."
"I'll talk to her but this is a pretty emotional day for her too and she's in pain too. The big thing is, even if she does; it can't change how much you love her."
"I still love her. That won't ever change. God, I was so scared when Adalyn came out like that. When she said she kept falling asleep…"
"I know, Mike. Me too. How's Adalyn?"
"She's been a total rock. She's taking Hannah to the bathroom now and I suspect, giving her a butt chewing."
"That's my girl. Lizzie has fussed all over me all day and I would guess when you and Hannah get home, she'll do the same with you all. She's working on a new book. She thought reading it might make you feel better about the deal with Hannah."
"I appreciate that but the only thing that will help that is…I honestly don't know."
"Mike, just focus on the positive. It's there. Be careful coming home?"
"Will do. Do you need anything, I know I promised you chocolate, a foot and back rub, polished toe nails, shaved legs and a bath but I figure we'll have Hannah with us tonight…or you will anyway. She will probably force me to sleep downstairs."
"And I will veto that. I want my husband with me. And Hannah can just deal with it."
"Yes, ma'am. Here's the girls. See you in about forty five minutes. I love you."
"I love you too. Mike, lean down and give Hannah a kiss for me."
"I will but she's already punched me in the stomach and blacked my eye today too. Split lip? I will give my girl one thing, she throws one hell of a right hook."
"Like father, like daughter."
"Yeah, just never thought I'd be on the receiving end with her."
"Mike, it'll be okay. She loves you and you're her buddy. Get her past today and past the pain and I have a feeling; she is going to be really torn up about all this."
"I hope…I think. I hate to see her hurting."
"I know. See you in a bit."
"Yep."
Christine hung and waited impatiently for Mike and their girls to get home. Lizzie was holding dinner for them and had made Mike's favorite soup and one that would easy on Hannah's stomach. They finally pulled in about thirty five minutes later and Christine met them in the entryway. Hannah was walking on her own two feet and as soon as she saw Christine, she ran for her. Christine immediately bent over and hugged her. She finally guided her to the couch while Mike went outside to get Hannah's sling.
"What's wrong, Sweetie, are you hurting?"
"Yes, but it's not that."
"What then?"
"I really hurt Daddy's feelings and he probably hates me."
"No, sweetie, he doesn't. He was telling me on the phone earlier how much he loves you and how proud he is of you."
"But did you see his eye? I did that."
"You did and you can't do it again. You also punched him in the stomach earlier. But you're daddy loves you so, so much. You know you can fix it?"
"How? I want to."
"As soon as he comes back in, give him a hug and tell him that you're sorry and that you love him."
"That's all?"
"Yep. That easy." Hannah nodded at her earnestly and went to the door to wait on Mike to come in. When he finally did walk in, he bent over to see what she needed and she immediately wrapped her one good arm around him and whispered something in his ear. Christine saw the slight smile on his face. He picked Hannah up and walked towards the living room with her. He looked a lot lighter than he had before.