In this chapter, stuff happens. But not in the fic.

Review replies;

Capertadia: Well, I try. =P Thanks for reading!

Pyrze4132: Ah well - onwards to 444! XD Thanks for reviewing!

OddAuthor: Thanks for all the reviews, mate! :D

TweenisodeOrange: You're absolutely right - C'ren would make a fantastic villain. I mean, she's clearly got issues. :| Thanks very much!

Nin: Well...okay! (immediately presses red button). Thanks!

Dimentio713: I have a gasmask, if it helps... Thank you!

Cartoonatic55: Very suspicious. I'll have to check it out... Anyway, merci boku!

RandomNumbers523156: It was supposed to be an EMP, shortening out his suit's systems. I'll check out your song. :) Thank ye!

Sgt. Reynol: Ah, thanks. I also see I forgot Belgians. Thanks a bunch!

One Less Lonely Gurl IV – In the Mountains of Mehness

Somewhere in the dark abyss of space, SMS Emden was heading for the Solar System, bound for Planet Earth.

Emden was a cruiser, a fast and modern design with a large crew. She was carrying several small pods, containing the essentials for starting a base planet-side. Her destination was the Richardson Mountains in Yukon, to establish a base of operations for the Kaiser in North America.

She was just one of eight similar vessels – Königsberg, Dresden, Elbing, Stettin, Gazelle, Irene and Stuttgart. All of these ships were heading to various positions on the planet.

The order – prepare for a takeover.

I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell,
I know, right now you can't tell,
But stay a while, and maybe then you'll see,
A different side of me…

"So," asked Sam, crossing her arms as she watched us return to the house, "Did you get the magic beans out?"

"We'll work on it later," I said, "Right now, we're opening the weapons vault."

"We have a weapons vault?" quizzed Danny.

"Yeah, they come standard for reviewers," I replied, "Danny, open it up and share out the ordinance. Tucker, get on the horn with CAFÉ and get us reinforcements. Ray, get a boarding party ready – we're going up to Tirpitz."

"And what're you gonna do?" asked Reynol.

"I'm gonna keep reviewing badfic," I shrugged, "Like the lazy git that I am."

I strode into the review room, ignoring Reynol shaking his head.

Xem and Spongebob were in there, eating popcorn and watching My Little Pony.

"Why are you guys here?" I quizzed.

"You left the door unlocked," replied Xem.

"Ah," I nodded, "Can you guys help me review something?"

"Yeah," shrugged Xem, "It's a Rarity episode anyway."

I blinked.

"Yes," I said.

I sat down and put the printed fic on the table.

The truth is, I actually snuck back in the silence of the early morning after the concert to the engine room of the submarine and dismantled the engines so that I can stop Justin from going back up to the land.

"Someone call the police!" Sam exclaimed, "This idiot is insane!"

That's because I want him to stay with me here and help me with my plans. The mere thought of this brought about a huge smile on my face. This is the true beginning of my life and my self-discovery, to find my purpose in this world.

"You already have a purpose," I snapped, "To be annoying."

"Didn't you tell me last night that you wanted to be able to take that stupid helmet off? Well, I am also a chemist,

"Drinking game," suggested Xem, "Whenever C'ren has a magical new skill, take a shot."

so perhaps I can invent something that will enable you to breathe underwater, but I will need Sheldon's help for that," I said. "I heard that he's also a chemist just like me."

"Isn't that guy an epic failure in life? As far as I heard of him, though."

"Yep, pretty much," I said. "It's just that I don't want to make him feel so bad about himself anymore. I mean, just look at his place. It's desolate and empty. I've already tasted the stuff that he sells. It's just so awful. So I want him to feel that at least he has done something right."

"So you stranded him under the ocean against your will," finished Sam, "You're a wonderful person."

"So, they…talk," said Spongebob, "And say that this is the real Bikini Bottom…and talk…and talk…"

"You get the point," nodded Sam.

As both of us went in the Krusty Krab, we both signed autographs for the people who were eating there while Justin's bodyguards helped us keep secure. Mr. Krabs went out of his office and politely escorted us to our table which looked like it had been reserved for us. It was on a raised platform, had a white tablecloth, and on top of it were pink roses in a crystal vase. There were also three scented candles with different shades of pink on top of the table, but not near enough the roses to burn them. Bikini Bottom actually has a special form of flame they discovered long ago in their history that was resistant to water but can be extinguished easily by enclosing it in a container just like normal land fires. Also, the underwater flames do not really grow very big.

"Don't try to explain the joke!" snapped Xem.

"Also, who tries to stop a fire by putting it in a container?" demanded Sam.

"Maybe it's a really big container," mused Spongebob.

Ward was there with his clarinet ready. As I sat down, Justin started to sing my favorite song, One Less Lonely Girl. Even if Ward was convinced that he was an untalented clarinet player, I actually thought he is pretty good.

"No! You can't Squidward play well! You can't!" exclaimed Xem.

"And since when did Squidward think he sucked?" demanded Sam.

"I don't think he sucks," whispered Spongebob.

We started to eat. We also talked about life in general, music, and ourselves. This is my first date, and of all the people I can have it with, I am ever grateful that it's with the one I always wanted to have, and of all places in the world, it's actually in a place I've always wanted to be in- far away from my past and all the pains and worries of the land above. The waters down here seemed to have effaced all traces of sadness in me if any of that is left at all. Down here, I can feel the ocean absorb the sun's rays everyday and transform it into a rainbow that adds color to my every day and heals my broken spirit.

"Yeah, I get it, you wave your hands and puke rainbows, now shut up!" groaned Sam.

"Everything is going as I am planning to," I thought to myself as the grin that is already formed on my face becomes more intense. "This is going to be great. If I can make Justin Bieber mine forever, my grand scheme of things will unfold the way they should. Time for the next step."

We all shivered as a cold wind seemed to blow through the room.

The next day, I told Justin that I cannot go with him and that I will have less time for him for the meantime because I will create the chemical that will allow him to breathe underwater. Justin, after all, is just a small but important part of my plan. Having him fall for me is just an additional point for the fulfillment of the things I am supposed to do. I know pretty darn well that the world does not revolve around him. The world revolves around the sun, so that means there is more to life than just him.

"That's oddly specific," said Spongebob.

"C'ren then goes for a job at the Krusty Krab," explained Xem, "Mr. Krabs says no, but then he says yes and fires Squidward – this is apparently a good thing."

"Yay layoffs!" I cheered.

"She proceeds to earn the restaurant two million dollars," Xem stressed.

There was a long silence.

"Two million dollars," repeated Xem.

"Economics does not work that way!" I shouted.

There was a knock at the door.

"Guys," called Danny, "Everyone's armed and CAFÉ sent a shuttle. We just need to do a lock and load montage. You up for it?"

"Coming!" I said, brightly.

Out in the backyard, the group was preparing to shuttle up to the Tirpitz.

Steel loaded the Luger and holstered it, before bringing out a kukri, throwing it into the air and catching it in his other hand.

Loon placed a new magazine in his M16, checked the sight and pulled back the safety, before slinging it over his shoulder and crossing his arms.

Xem, who had come unarmed, had been given a MAS-38 upgraded with a heat sink and a probably unnecessary scope. He quickly checked the heat sink before attaching a bayonet to the barrel.

Reynol had been given a Vickers Machine Gun, enhanced to be man portable and upgraded to fire a particle beam. He picked it up and held it at hip level, grinning.

Sandy slipped on her karate gloves. Once they were on, she jumped up, chopped at air and landed in a defensive position.

Spongebob pulled out his bubble soap, blew a small bubble, and grinned.

Danny clenched his fists as white rings appeared around his waist, crossing over him as he turned into Danny Phantom.

The shuttle door opened. Jimmy Neutron, carrying a Tornado Blaster and wearing a baseball helmet, called for us to get int. Behind him, Madness Abe, Dimentio, Dimentia and Cartoonatic were waiting for us to get in.

"Tucker, Sam!" called Danny as we approached the shuttle, "Hold the fort and try to hack into the Tirpitz's systems!"

"Got it," said Tucker, saluting.

Danny nodded as we climbed into the shuttle, the door shutting behind us as we rocketed off into the sky.

TO BATTLE, CHUMS!