Episode 37: Maybe I'm too busy being yours
Have you no idea that you're in deep?
I've dreamt about you nearly every night this week
How many secrets can you keep?
'Cause there's this tune I found
That makes me think of you somehow
And I play it on repeat
Until I fall asleep
Karma saw the cogs turning inside Nagisa's head. The blue-haired boy seemed devastated, but not like he had already given up. Karma was just about to join Nagisa to comfort him, but in that moment he started walking forwards to Kayano. What the hell did he come up with, Karma asked himself. He watched the smaller teen on his way to Koro-sensei and Kayano. But he could have never imagined what Nagisa did next. He…kissed her? What!? Karma stared at Nagisa while he felt his heart being shattered into a million tiny pieces. Of course he wanted to save Kayano too, but that didn't seem like an action to save a friend to him. There would have been other ways to distract her as well. Karma watched Nagisa' hand in Kayano's hair, his lips on her mouth. Still he kept his eyes wide open. After a few seconds, he let go of the green-haired girl, and Koro-sensei took care of her and removed the tentacles. Nagisa let himself fall onto his knees. He seemed to be really tired. Kanzaki and Okuda joined Kayano, and Sugino ran over to Nagisa. Karma remained just standing there, still shocked of what just happened. Nagisa asked Kayano if she was alright. He tried to be calm as he saw Kayano blush. Nagisa ignored it. He looked at Karma instead. Karma glanced back at him. He tried to act normal and look just like an average teenage boy who was glad that they were able to save their friend. A lot made sense to him now. Kayano being sick so often, and always returning home right after school or rehearsal. Karma still considered her as his friend. He was convinced that Kayano didn't act everything. There have been good moments, she had been happy. Her greed for revenge, magnified by the tentacles, wasn't able to erase all the good.
Meanwhile, Koro-sensei informed the class about his past. Actually, he was an assassin called the god of death. His apprentice betrayed him and revealed him to a science lab, and gave himself the name of the god of death. The lab did a lot of experiences on Koro-sensei, but he manipulated them to help him increase his own power. He met someone at the lab who turned out to be Kayano's sister.
I don't know if you feel the same as I do
We could be together if you wanted to
Do I wanna know?
If this feeling flows both ways?
Sad to see you go
Was sorta hoping that you'd stay
Baby, we both know
That the nights were mainly made
For saying things that you can't say tomorrow day
Crawling back to you
Ever thought of calling when you've had a few?
Cause I always do
Karma still couldn't believe it. His teacher was a professional assassin, his friend was an actress who implanted herself tentacles to kill him and Nagisa kissed her. A lot to process for one night. He glanced over to Nagisa. Their eyes met.
Please, Karma, Nagisa shouted on the inside, please don't look at me like that. You look hurt. Please don't be- I don't love her, and you should know that, remember, I told you. It's not like that. I don't love her. I love you. I should tell him. Nagisa lowered his gaze. He couldn't stand seeing Karma looking like that. He was glad about saving Kayano, but he hated himself for doing that to Karma. He seemed to care. A lot, he looked jealous. A friend wouldn't be jealous. Nagisa smiled to himself a little. I knew it. I'm not just a friend to him. What should I do? He felt embarrassed about the kiss. He hoped that Kayano didn't feel too uncomfortable about it. Sugino sat down beside Nagisa, "Are you alright?", he asked the blue-haired boy. Nagisa grimaced. "I think so", he answered, "I feel weird." "Because of Kayano?", Sugino questioned. "Yes", Nagisa responded, "and because of Karma." Sugino raised an eyebrow. "I don't know, he just acted in a strange way", Nagisa continued, "and he looked…hurt. I don't want him to look like that." "So it's pretty obvious", Sugino concluded, "he's in love with you, hat's why he didn't like seeing you kiss another one." Nagisa stared at the ground. "I really need to talk to him", he stated. Sugino mentioned: "maybe you should." "But I don't know what to say", Nagisa spoke. "Remember when I asked you about what you meant when you said you're feeling 'that way'?", Sugino asked his friend who simply nodded. "I'm sure you remember your answer", he continued, "why don't you tell him just that?" Nagisa thought about his words. Sugino was right. He should just tell him, what could go wrong?
He hesitated. On the one hand, he just wanted to say it, no matter the reaction because he accepted the way he felt. But on the other hand, he didn't want to do anything that could possibly influence their relationship in a bad way. He knew karma wouldn't laugh at him or make fun of his feelings, but it would get strange if Karma didn't reply his emotions. He couldn't stand losing Karma again. Simply the thought of it made his heart shiver. Nagisa looked over to the redhead. Currently he was talking to Karasuma-sensei. Nagisa watched him closely. He knew that he had to do something. He wouldn't allow Karma to suffer a heartbreak. Even if he had to be the one to endure one. As Nagisa watched Karma's hair falling in his face and the glow inside his eyes, he was willed to do anything to clear the situation. At any cost.