Slowly and in deep thought, Gaius reached out for the glass of water Gwen brought. Merlin turned to Gwen in wonder who was watching Uther in concern.
How could he ask Gwen to forgive the king…? Merlin turned to Gaius, heart beating rapidly, trying to figure out what he was thinking, but Gaius looked confused himself, pouring some of the water down Uther's mouth.
"So?Is there anything we can do? Are we going to try to get Morgause?" Gwen said in panic, her eyes flickering between Gaius and Merlin.
A sudden feeling of sadness overcame Merlin. He could not ask Gwen, he just couldn't. To ask Gwen to forgive Uther for killing her father was something he couldn't imagine himself doing if he was in her shoes. He turned to Gaius who also looked troubled.
"Well…?" she waited.
"Gwen… there is one way of curing the king." Gaius began, slightly hesitant.
Merlin closed his eyes and lowered his head, for he didn't know if he could agree to ask Gwen this. He hated himself for hoping she would agree however.
"Well.. what is it? Gwen asked hopefully, flickering her eyes between an ashamed looking Merlin, and a troubled looking Gaius, making her feel very worried. "What? what's going on?"
"Gwen, the way to cure Uther… is.. for someone to forgive him.."
Merlin cringed a little when he recognized Gaius was going to ask Gwen to forgive Uther.
"Forgive him for what?"
"Gwen… someone needs to forgive him for an injustice he has done to their loved ones. Most likely- an injustice done to someone's parents"
Gwen seemed to have caught on, for she went back a little in a sense of understanding.
"So- who would do that..?" breathed Gwen nervously, trying to hide she understood.
Merlin faced down and closed his eyes for a moment. He couldn't make eye contact with Gwen as Gaius held a conversation with her, but felt her eyes burning onto him a few time throughout.
"Well…" Gaius said nervously, looking down. "One person who has dealt with Uther's injustice towards a loved one, would be you."
Merlin looked up slowly at Gwen's reaction, and saw shock.
"Me?" Gwen repeated, retreating backward a little.
"Yes.."
"I- I…" Gwen started hysterically, her nerves beginning to show, while glancing at Merlin and Gaius both. "How- how could I forgive him? I – He- He isn't even sorry for what he's done!" called Gwen , her eyes beginning to tear as she shook her head.
Merlin lowered his head more as he found this whole conversation unbearable.
"I understand Gwen…" Gaius sighed, looking down too.
Gwen was still panicking, looking at Uther and back at the other two, while shaking her head.
"I just… I just can't . I just.. He killed my father Gauis! I don't wish the King dead, but I- I can't forgive him.. you have to understand! even if I say it, I can't mean it." Gwen pled.
"Gwen… you don't need to be sorry." Merlin spoke up firmly. "You don't. You can't help what you feel, and you cannot force yourself to forgive him."
"I wish I could help Merlin, I just..I can't." Gwen said wiping her nose. She looked increasingly upset and looked down. "I need to get some towels…" she said quickly.
Merlin got up and ran out the door after her.
"Gwen!"
Gwen turned around with tears falling down.
"It's not right of us to have asked you to forgive Uther.. .for what he's done to your father.…"
"No- of course it is.. I should say yes… and save the king.."
"Gwen… I don't know what I would do if I were you… I don't know if I'd be able to do it."
Gwen looked down in distress and shook her head and tried to smile. "I'll go get some more towels Merlin."
Merlin nodded and looked down thinking about what just happened. He walked through Uther's door glanced at a troubled Gaius.
"What do we do now, Gaius?" Merlin asked. Gaius sighed in a trouble.
"I suppose we would have to find someone whose parents died because of Uther." Gaius said, turning to Uther, patting the sweating Uther with a damped cloth. "All within a couples of hours. I'm afraid he is losing time.."
"Gaius, its midnight right now. Do you really think we can find someone..?" Merlin said upset. He thought of Arthur and thought of his reaction to his father dying.
"We will have to Merlin..." Gaius sighed.
Merlin nodded in worry "Who can we go to..?"
"You can go to me." Gwen said coming in quietly.
"Gwen…?"
"No Merlin… I need to. I want to.. Morgause sought out revenge on Uther, and wanted him dead. If I let him die, I am only doing the same."
Merlin stared at Gwen for a few moments.
"Gwen- are you sure?"
Gwen nodded. "I don't want Arthur to go through the same pain I did, if I can help it.."
Merlin watched Gwen walk towards the king observing him carefully. He turned to Gaius who nodded at him. Merlin jumped in realization- this was it. Uther needed to be saved, and now they had all they needed.
"So… what do I do…" Gwen said nervously, hands fidgeting while coming closer to Uther as she turned to Merlin and Gaius.
"Uhmm… ok.. well.." Merlin said turning to Gaius.
"You must put your hand on Uther's heart.. and feel your forgiveness in your heart." Gaius completed.
Gwen inhaled and nodded while looking at Uther.
Merlin held his breath and retreated a little and opened the Niwe Steorra. He found the spell in green ink as big bold letters. He inhaled and watched Gwen carefully.
Gwen slowly lifted her hand over Uther carefully. She held her breath and closed her eyes and shook her head. She lowered her hand onto Uther's heart and kept her eyes closed tightly.
Merlin looked down at the Niwe Steorra. "Edhwierft se blódwracu" and watched Gwen carefully.
What Merlin saw next caused him to flinch in absolute horror, heart rocking his whole body. Uther entire body jerked upward and blood began flowing out of his mouth.
"GAIUS MERLIN! What's happening to HIM!" Gwen squealed, moving away from Uther.
Merlin heart pounded as he ran to Uther and saw the blood trickling out of his mouth. He turned to Gaius, who was equally horrified. Gaius kneeled by Uther, placed his finger at Uther's neck for his pulse.
"He's still alive, but it's very faint! Merlin, get me some of the water and more towels! Quickly!"
"Why didn't it work? You said it would work!" Gwen cried, tears streaming down her cheeks pulling away.
"It's supposed to!" Merlin said running to Uther's drawers.
Merlin rummaged through Uther's drawers and pulled out any plain clothes her could find and on his way back to Gaius, he picked up a pail of water near Uther's bedside and dampened the clothes with the water.
Gaius pulled up Uther's large shoulder guard that had covered a part of his chest and was terrified to see what was beneath. His clothes were soaked in dark blood- so soaked the clothes were not touching his skin.
"His chest has also wounded. Quickly Merlin, give me some dry cloth, we need to stop the bleeding immediately."
Merlin's mind was spinning as he handed Gaius the damped cloth. He kneeled next to Gaius who was checking his heart beat and turned to Merlin. What could have went wrong? Why did the spell backfire?
"It's getting fainter Merlin." Gaius said quietly.
Gwen stood frozen, sobbing as she watched the whole scene intensely. "He can't die, Gaius, Uther can't!" Gwen cried shaking her head. Merlin turned from Gwen to Uther, and then back to Gwen. Merlin didn't know why he knew, but it came to him immediately.
"Edhwierft se blódwracu" Merlin whispered again.
Gaius pressed the bloody cloth against Uther's chest and wiped his own sweaty brow. Merlin watched Uther carefully, for any signs of life. And then he saw it. And he wasn't the only one.
"His eyes flickered." Gaius quickly stated checking Uther's heart rate. "His heart beat is picking back up!" he said looking up at Gwen. Gwen stared back at Gaius and held her breath.
"Gwen get me some of that concoction I used on Sir Henry the other day. It's in my chambers."
Gwen nodded hesitatingly and ran out.
Gaius was quiet, fingers still on Uther's pulse while Merlin pressed the cloth on Uther's wounds, wiping his hands from Uther's blood. Merlin's heart beat was boldly rocking his body with such fright. He turned to Gaius.
"Is he getting better?" Merlin panted, pressing the cloth harder on Uther's wound.
Gaius was still watching Uther. "His heart beat is increasing Merlin…"
Merlin wanted to ask Gaius what he thought happened. But he didn't think it was the best time and remained silent while reversing the side of the cloth to press on Uther's wound. Interestingly enough, the blood began to clot.
Gwen ran back in and handed Gaius the concoction.
"Thank you Gwen…" Gaius said opening the bottle. He poured some of the potion in Uther's throat and waited. Everyone held their breath waiting for some sign that Uther would be okay.
*Cough*
It seemed like a miracle. The three looked at each other as Uther began to squint his eyes and close them back again to rest.
"I think he will be okay…" nodded Gaius with a troubled look.
"Merlin…"
"yes?"
"You haven't slept much today.. I think you need some more rest before you go find Arthur."
Merlin and Gaius were still in Uther's chambers. Merlin was on the floor, legs out and slumping against the wall near the bed. Gaius was sitting on a stool to watch over Uther. Uther hadn't spoken yet, but he did show signs of recovering. His stopped sweating, blood was clotting, and his heart beat returned to a slightly below normal state. Gaius had long before told Gwen to go get rest, for she had the hardest and most stressful time of all. Gwen basically saved Uther's life by forgiving Uther, which when coupled with a spell from the Niwe Steorra, saved Uther's life.
"I'll be fine Gaius. You need some sleep too.."
"I won't be able to leave Uther's side Merlin…"
"So he's going to be okay?"
"Yes … and no. Uther has gone through a lot right now and some things will be beyond repair. I don't know if Uther will return to be the same Uther as we last saw. He's gone through a lot of physical trauma."
"You mean he'll be physically weaker…"
"Weaker in all senses Merlin.. the trauma he went through affects not only the body but mind as well."
"So..will he still be able to carry on with being a king and regular activities.?"
"He will.. but .. Merlin. It's different. Tell me..when you have a plant, and you forget to water it, what happens?"
"It withers away…?"
"Why does it wither away?"
"Well.. like you said, you haven't watered it.."
"Right. Now if you begin to water a withered away plant, will the plant return to its normal state..?"
"No…"
"That's the same for Uther. Uther's' lost a lot that cannot be recovered. And I'm afraid… that will mean Arthur needs to begin understanding he will have to start his 'training' to be king."
Merlin's heart raced a bit and moved his head forward.
"What do you mean? Are you saying Uther's going to die soon?"
"I'm not certain, Merlin. From what I can see, it looks like he may be able to hold up for some time. But Merlin.. it would be a denial if we don't begin to get Arthur ready."
Merlin thought about the plant Gaius used as an analogy and shook his head.
"Gaius… why do you think the spell didn't work the first time?" Merlin asked quietly.
"I think you know the reason as much as I do. The amount the spell can work is in proportion to the amount Gwen forgave him."
"So she didn't necessarily forgive him at first."
"It's hard to switch your heart Merlin. I have every belief Gwen wanted to forgive Uther, but in her heart, she really couldn't. When Gwen saw Uther truly about to die, that is when I believe she truly decided to forgive him. And you noticed it Merlin.. that's why you said the spell again."
Merlin nodded and exhaled.
"I need to go and find Arthur now." Merlin said a little sad, getting up to his feet. He rubbed his forehead and ran his hands through his hair. He turned to Gaius and pulled out his necklace that would take him to Carmarthen.
"Be careful Merlin." Gaius nodded.
Merlin smiled unsure.
"To Carmarthen."