~My Fairy~
18th February X784
Name: Benny Makaren (now Benny 'Benny-boy' Makarov Makaren)
Age: 19 (now 20 years old)
Sex: Male (still male apart from that one chapter...)
Height: 157cm (now 158cm)
Weight: 54kgs (now 54kgs and 375grams)
Blood Type: O-negative (unchanged)
Eye colour: Blue (unchanged – maybe a little rounder and more two-dimensional in shape though)
Hair Colour: Somewhere between 5.1 and 5.3 Medium Brown (now approximately 0.32% more Grey)
Skin colour: One of those white colours (now slightly tanner – on the arms and face at least)
Fingernail/toenail colour: mostly pink; but extent of white varies incredibly for fingernails
Benny Makaren, a peculiar human boy with the spectacular ability to grow his fingernails at his own will. His place of origin is unknown but he arrives in Fiore Kingdom's city of Magnolia with the intention of finding a new job and a relaxing, Renaissance lifestyle.
What he ends up finding himself in is...
"Benny Makaren, welcome to the Fairy Tail Wizards Guild! Now with this crest you will officially be a Fairy Tail Wizard."
20th February X784
Occupation: Fairy Tail Mage and guild grunt/errand boy/manure shoveller
Location of Fairy Crest: Left butt-cheek
Colour of Fairy Crest: Black – or possibly Brown, I dunno you go and check if you want to look at it so much!
Teammates: Lucy Heartfillia, Wendy Marvel and Charles (a.k.a the 'damn flying feline')
Benny Makaren develops his finger-licking good talents out on the field as he embarks on a numerous amount of odd jobs over the next few weeks and months, some of his most prominent include; vaccinating Vulcans,
"WAH! You know when the sign says Vulcans I was expecting something more bird-like and harmless!"
"That's Vultures you idi-AGGGHHH!"
"Hehe! Looks like all the males in the animal kingdom are after you Lucy!"
"SHUT-UP-SHUT-UP-SHUT-UUUWAAAAGGHH!"
Seducing Erza Scarlet,
"So did you wanna talk about work or-WAAAGGHH...E-e-e-e-Erza?"
"Shhhhh...We don't want to bother the neighbours."
"Hehehehehehehehe THAT'S FUNny – I mean *Gulp* I had no idea you felt this way about me."
"I couldn't hide it any longer. When I first cast my eyes on you, I believed you must have been sent to me by God himself to become my one true love."
"Well I'm really grateful, b-but I think we should just chat and maybe hug each other for a while first."
"But I want to have you now Benny-boy! Why must we wait when we can satisfy each others innermost desires at this very moment."
*Gulp...*
*Gulp...*
*GULP...*
*GULP!*
"Well, um, Erza...I think- Whoah! Okay I think I should come clean now."
"Be-nny-Bo-y..."
"Y~es?"
"There's...just...one more thing...I need...to tell you...PFFFFFHAAAAGGGHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Trying to nab a bunch of lacrima drug peddlers,
"LUCY DON'T LET GO OF MY HAND!"
"BEN-SAN!"
"HANG ON WENDY! I'M COMING!"
Picking up Mirajane's magic-mobile,
"Well looks like this chariot is nearly reaching its end."
"Yay, that was fun wasn't it~? Mirajane will be so happy now."
"Yeah, that was a pretty awesome ride."
"UGH!"
"What the-Elfman?"
"Man...should not...perform physical labour..."
"Whah? Was he pushing us the whole time?"
"Sorry Benny, I just wanted to make you feel better, I didn't really write any spell on your arm, I'm terribly sorry."
And among many other things, ruining the kind gestures of a certain neighbour.
"Happy Easter Benny!"
"Did you get all this...for me? But I thought you guys don't give out eggs for Easter."
"What? Of course we do. We hand out lots of gifts and chocolate to our friends for Easter, but you wouldn't expect just a regular chicken egg if that's what you meant."
"Hehe, well I guess not."
"What's the matter?"
"Oh well you see, I kinda, didn't get anything for you for Easter and so I-"
"*SWOON* I saw the way you went after that man yesterday. That was really brave of you Benny Makaren, well done."
"Well, I guess my power must be getting stronger every day. Hahahaha-Owfgh! *BLUERGH*."
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
21st April X784
Benny Makaren has his birthday...
WARNING_SYSTEM_ERROR_!
22nd April X784
Benny does not have his birthday and everything goes back to normal (in Fairy Tail standards)
20th June X784
End of Edolas arc as we know it. Benny emerges from lacrima crystal to find new guild-mates and friends.
"Oh that's Lisanna. She came back to life...The black cat over there is Pantherlily – Dick over there dragged him back here from Edolas too."
"And we also seem to have got ourselves another new member during the time skip."
"I'm Yoshi Takimora, pleased to meet you Mr Makaren!"
21st June X784
Makarov Dreyer, Third Master of the Fairy Tail Guild, sadly passes away and surprises everyone by becoming the first Major Character Death in the history of Fairy Tail (well apart from Simon; Lisanna doesn't count anymore, and flashback deaths don't count either!)
22nd June X784
Funeral and informal will gathering held for the late guild master. Laxus, as Master of the Geriatrics' Guild also appears for the first time and confronts the grief-stricken guild.
Edo-Erza also appears for some reason – possibly to cover the Edolas Arc aspect of the Geriatrics' Guild concept. But we have a better reason to explain her appearance later on...
"We will give you guys twenty-four hours to decide whether you will stay here, and serve me as your new Guild Master, or leave and be considered a rogue Wizard and an enemy of the new Guild."
"H-hey! What if you guys just share one half of the guild and we can keep the other?"
"Oh, I didn't notice you there...Benny Makaren."
"H-how do you know my name?"
"You, little man, are my biggest problem of all..."
With that ever so subtle piece of foreshadowing, the Geriatrics' guild is underway. And following some angsty discussions among guild-mates, Benny chooses ten brave mages and three flying cats to go with him (gee since when the hell did we decide they were accompanying him?) on a night-time showdown with the assorted arc villain rejects which comprised the Geriatrics' Guild.
"You damn Fairy faggots are pretty bold entering Geriatrics' turf."
"Yeah they areoohoohooww!"
"Kakaka! Indeed."
"Oh dear. Now that you mention it, the culinary options here were pretty lacklustre..."
"You dislike my cooking eh? I'll be sure to add extra MSG next time – WHEN I GIVE YOU YOUR FRIED MSG!"
"NOOOO!"
Benny Makaren and his company of 10 plus three cats fought the geriatrics and their mooky bandits valiantly - well most of them did; Erza was knocked out before the battle started and Benny was having a few 'clawing' problems of his own.
"KYAH! Watch where you aim those damn things!"
"Oh maaan c'wawawa watcha doing dooog come be fighting at me witcha real claws baby aaarrrrooo!"
"Excuse me Toby, but I think we should try and reconcile our differences and-HYAH! Wait whoah hey ah ooh eeh!"
"Geerr Benny why youuuu all dodging my claws and stuff oooh?"
"NONONO WAAAGGGHH!"
Logic dictates that the other guy should have won this battle. But what would Fairy Tail even be with logic in the first place? So naturally thanks to some crazy light beam or something, Benny Makaren knocks the pants off his opponent (quite literally - well actually the pants stay on his legs but as for the rest of his body – kwoh!)
Perhaps Benny Makaren's highly unanticipated victory must have sparked some Braveheart into the other Fairy folks as they soon ended up beating the snot out of the exact same villains which they had already beaten the snot out of at some point before in the canon.
"Oi! Hang on a minute...Oi Benny! Why aren't you gonna stop him?"
"What do you mean? You and your guys tried to hurt us and take over our guild."
"B-b-but Benny, you've gotta save me...These guys are about to kill me."
"What the heck is wrong with Laxus here?"
"Yeah, first you try and barge into your Grandfather's funeral, then you threaten our guild and gather all these beaten freaks to come do your dirty work...And now you're grovelling at our feet for mercy?"
"I swear I didn't mean for it to turn out this way. I just didn't think Gramps' will was gonna be fair for me is all."
"After what you have done to us in the past and just now...You have no right to call Gramps 'Gramps' and certainly no claim over any of his inheritance!"
"Please listen to me!"
"Dammit Natsu just roast him already!"
"Now come on!... How much longer are you gonna let Natsu pick on me...Half-Uncle Benny..."
23rd June X794
The sun rises. A major revelation is revealed.
Benny Makaren.
Relatives: Laxus Dreyer (Half-uncle)
Father – his *breathes deeply through a Styrofoam cup* real father : Makarov Dreyer
Mother: Still unknown (Mmm?-?-?)
Results of the will: Laxus gets to rejoin guild; Erza gets the killer awesome Fairy Law spell and some more ammo; Mirajane gets to be guild housekeeper – which was pretty much what she was already doing before but I guess it sounds more formal and official now; Natsu gets some stupid abstract advice much to his disappointment; everyone else gets some of Makarov's asset worth in the form of 10,000 jewel.
Fourth Master of the Guild as dictated by Makarov's Will beyond the grave: Benny Makaren.
And so with a new guild master, some new guild members and peace restored to the land for the time being, everyone celebrates and drinks the night away – except for the lightweight new Master who ends up retiring from the elation early.
Oh and in keeping with Mishima's form, a previously defeated villain ends up joining the guild:
"WELL, WELL! What have we here I wonder? Looks like we're all having a splendid time indeed."
"YOU TRASH SNIFFING BASTARD! What the hell do you want now!-?"
"Why I just felt like dropping in for a drink or two, you know since I plan on joining you folks on business and such."
"Joining us?"
"Well since your guild managed to thwart my previous contract with the Geriatrics, I'm out of a job and need a new source of employment and income."
"Should I roast this guy for you Benny-boy?"
"Should we go all Die Hard on him and give him six to the torso?"
"It's your decision whether you accept him in our guild or not now...Master..."
"I just have one question...Why were you digging through my garbage that day?"
"Duh! I was looking through your receipts to get ID and stuff about you."
"Suits me. Fine you're in!"
2nd July X784
According to the Fairy Tail wiki, this is when the canon was actually meant to start, but noone noticed did they – hehe, gehehehe (*slurps some coffee evilishly*)
Somewhere between July-August X784
The first proper time skip period in My Fairy (since being in a Lacrima crystal for two months doesn't really count) as Benny Makaren, the new master of the Fairy Tail guild, consolidates his new position of 'power', forming a new team with new recruits Yoshi Takimora and Darren 'The Layman' Cruz.
"There's only one thing I hate more than Zombie-vampire-robot-ninja-pirates...And that's Zombie-vampire-robot-ninja-pirates...THAT SPARKLE!"
Don't we all. Anyway, it seems that during this time-skip, Benny and his new team had managed to score some slightly more epic jobs - -you know the kinds where you actually kinda had to sorta use some of your y'know...Mahou...
"You need to train harder Master Makaren. Who else will defend our guild if you cannot?"
"Well. There's Natsu, Erza, Lucy, Wendy, Gray, Mirajane, Elfman, Gajeel, Levy, Laxus, The Thunder God Tribe, Cana, Juvia, Lisanna and I suppose those flying cats are pretty reliable too..."
"Yes, but what if something were to happen to all [emphasis added] of them, then who would you depend on to defend the guild?"
"Well, I was pretty much hoping everyone else would chip in their lives for my sake y'know."
"I just wish you could take this a little more seriously Master."
"Well let's just head back and claim our Gems eh?"
But with new friends and allies inevitably brings new enemies, foes and just plain outright douchebags...
"OH MY GAWD IT'S HIM!"
"Aye it is!"
"Bloody Mest Gryder..."
And with being a Master of a Mage's guild comes a Master of responsibilities; most of which are exacerbated when you're surrounded by general buffoons and three not so well-advising advisors.
"Sorry Hunky, d'ya miss me?"
"WAGH!"
"Laxus why do you keep running off and reappearing at the most inconvenient times?"
"Sorry Hunky. I've been on another S-Class mission, fighting some demon babes down at the Volcanic Hot Springs."
"You said that was your mission the last time." I say in my high suspicion. "God could you guys please be a little more useful in your advisory roles!"
"I think it's time for our little scrapper of a Master to go to bed."
"What!-? But it's only 7.30...And who else is going to sort out these papers?"
"Aww, Master Makaren's had a big day didn't he? But now it's bed time for the little tiger ~isn't it~?"
"Wha- but I-*HURNGH*!"
And so as the paperwork piled up and everyone's irrational fawning over Mest Gryder increased exponentially over the coming days, Benny would eventually confront his nemesis in more ways than one. But let's not worry about the brainwashed guild lynch mob and go straight to 'that' scene.
"Please stop this!"
"Shhh...I've nearly finished it..."
"Mest."
[Insert tooth removing punch sound effect here]
"J-just what the hell...do you think you're doing?"
But of course looks proved to be deceiving for the sugar-powered Master as Wendy explained the situation as innocently and peace-lovingly as usual. Then all of Benny's house of cards fell down when Lucy spouted out,
"BENNY HE HAS OCD!"
"He has...OCD?"
"Yes for crying out loud! He was only using Wendy as a bookrest because he has a mental condition you idiot! Had you no idea?"
If not wearing deodorant had caused enough resentment from his guild-mates, then the fact that he struck a mentally retarded and much-loved and admired guild member would certainly lead to pure revulsion.
"You hurt my buddy Mest? Oh you're not even worth scorching now..."
"Yeah, Ben. Hitting a retard is just plain low."
"Geez I can't believe I ever looked up to you...Wait I never did anyway but still."
"You are an absolute disgrace to this guild!"
"I think we should consider if you're the kind of person we want leading our guild."
And to prevent a very fatal outcome with Erza's new hand-me-down spell, Benny Makaren made the ultimate self-sacrifice.
"You have all caught me out...I really am nothing but a fraud...I don't deserve to be your Master or a member of this guild..."
8th August X784
Benny Makaren officially goes on the Fairy Dole program (geddit because it's like a Fairy Doll but in fact he's working for the – oh forget about it!)
August-October X784
The Unemployment arc – including three-week sub arc when Benny Makaren was working for Raving Rave's Ranch (but does that really count as a job?)
Sometime in October (dates unclear)
Benny's condition deteriorates as he continues living in squalor. He nearly dies on several occasions but some of the larger mutant rats were able to perform resuscitation on him a few times.
Thankfully, Benny was saved on one of these near death occasions by an actual person. And even better for him it's someone reasonably attractive too. And even more better for him perhaps is that it is someone he knows (or thinks he knows as we later find out).
"Poor fella, how long's it been since ya felt anything like this?"
"Gaarruuhheerrreehh?"
"Lucy?"What are you doing?"
"Aww come on it's just a bit of fun."
And so Lucy successfully – ahem, ahem...'Nursed' the withered little chap named Benny back to health. Now we find ourselves in, probably near the end of October or the start of November and Benny Makaren revitalised enough that he regains the courage and motivation to make amends with the guild. But all is not as it seems when he returns after such a long absence.
"JUVIA YOU BASTARD!"
"I'LL KILL YOU LEVY!"
PLEASE DON'T HARM MY JUVIA-SAMA!"
"WHY CAN'T EVERYONE BE A TRUE GENTLEMAN AND SETTLE THIS PEACEFULLY?"
"I QUITE AGREE, YOUR SAVAGE BEHAVIOUR IS RUINING MY TEA!"
"IF YOU ALL DON'T SHUT THE HELL UP IN FIVE SECONDS I'LL INSERT MY LANCE SO FAR UP YOUR ARSES YOU'LL BE RECITING THE TEN COMMANDMENTS IN A HOSPITAL WARD FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIVES!"
Apart from Erza, everyone else (whose important to the plot at least) was different. The shocking truth had been delivered to the very confused Benny-boy by none other than a certain Layman observer.
"The real ones went on a vacation to some island, these guys are just phony knockoffs..."
Despite those mean little minor characters (mainly led by Charles) deliberately keeping Benny in the dark about the recent character swap, Lucy (who turned out to be Edo-Lucy) gave the poor caffeine deprived lad a much-needed explanation for the sequence of events which had occurred over the last few months or so. Also the impression had been given that the real versions of those mages had in fact left at some point for their S-Class exam, making poor Benny feel even more dejected. But even without going on a remote island holiday exam, Benny would still wind up entering an S-Class trial of his own soon enough.
BOOOOOOOOOM!
"What the clawing crap was that!-?"
That, Benny-boy, is the moment you really start biting your overgrown nails...
That, Benny-boy, is the day the Fairy War began.
Now with his strongest allies away at the worst possible time and a bunch of opposite-day-only-all-the-time Edolas folks in their places, Benny must now somehow organise his mixed bag of followers and lead the frontal defence of not only his Fairy Tail Guild, but his entire town, and possibly even the entire world (Oh er...well we won't go that far just yet...)! Is this amateur Master really up to the task to defend an entire city? And what exactly is this new enemy, which has made its presence felt quite loudly, that Benny and his Edo/Earthlandian allies must fight against? Make some room in those undies Benny-boy... you're gonna need a crap-load of it for the next dozen chapters...
…
...
Benny Makaren...20 years old...Last bastion of hope for Magnolia?
Oh they're so screwed!
~To be Continued...~
Well I hope you navigated your way through that troublesome best-of (*cough* fil *cough* filler *cough) chapter alright. Next chapter we shall see how Benny and the gang confront these scary looking mooks who are starting fires and killing people, which is making Mishima-sama very sad now. How will they respond to this immediate threat? Do you think they could use a little teamwork perhaps and save their sorry little fairy buttocks for at least a day or two? Bunker down as you stay tuned for the next epic chapter!