Disclaimer: Hetalia's not mine.

He couldn't believe he was back. Matthew looked dully around the bedroom – their bedroom – and knew in that moment he'd never return. He would select what things he couldn't live without, and decide where he wanted to live next. The room was so cold and uninviting. It was obvious it had not been occupied since the war started. No, since Matthew had gone to Diamonds, what felt like so long ago.

The obvious choice for Matthew now was Diamonds, but... as soon as the thought entered his head, he knew that was wrong, too. He wanted... more. Something new. Maybe he could see the world, all of the interesting places he had read about while he was barely able to move. It would be nice to be on his own for a while, he had never been on his own before. Or as on his own as somebody in his condition could be, anyway.

Could he afford such an endeavor? Would his royal friends help? He didn't really want that, though... Well, maybe he could become a real doctor, and offer his service in his travels to earn some money.

With a sigh, Matthew dropped onto his bed, grabbing a stuffed animal that had been left behind. Alfred would probably think he was stupid for wanting to run away, leave everyone and everything and especially Francis behind, but he had to. While losing his twin, his other half, was of course a major factor, that wasn't all. He had seen too much in a short time that he had to deal with. Too much suffering, and death. He had spent much of the past year spying on two people he cared about!

He needed to get away. Francis likely wouldn't understand, but he was going to have to try. Matthew would miss him like crazy, but...

He wasn't surprised when the door swung open. It wasn't like he'd crept into the palace unnoticed, it was only a matter of time before somebody came to say hello.

"Mathieu... it's really you." Francis was grinning broadly as he walked into the room, tears shining in his eyes. "That was quick!" He hurried close to embrace Matthew tightly. "I missed you so much." They kissed, Matthew melting into the embrace and kissing back desperately. Francis rained kisses all over Matthew's face. "I was so worried... I thought I'd never see you again."

Matthew couldn't help but smile. "I missed you, too." He reached out to caress Francis' stubbled (and damp) cheek. "I really, really did." If only Francis weren't King, they could run away together... Matthew stepped back, blinking, as something occurred to him. "You don't seem really surprised by my return."

"Well, no." Francis laughed. "I didn't expect you so soon, though. We only heard ourselves this morning."

"Heard what?"

Francis' smile fell. "You really didn't hear?"

Matthew grit his teeth. "I only came back to talk to Arthur. I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh." Francis' grin was quick to return, and he grabbed Matthew in another embrace. "Well, it's over, Mathieu. The war is over."

His words sank slowly into Matthew's brain, leaving him stunned. Over? It's over already? Did Ivan... is this because of...? "Wh-what?"

"The Queen fell in battle. She was much too reckless, that's why royalty doesn't belong on the battlefield..."

"Oh." Matthew's eyes widened. So it had nothing to do with him, after all. "Oh..." If it had nothing to do with him, then that meant Alfred had died just before the war ended. If he had only made it a little longer...

"It was one of ours! One of mine, I mean, a Diamonds soldier defeated her. And survived! He's a hero!" Francis laughed in delight. "The Clubs army is retreating, and the King is on his way here to negotiate." Another kiss. "So perhaps you should see Arthur soon, hm? Before he's too busy. And then we can spend all day in each other's arms."

"Right..." Matthew's eyes slid shut. "Yes, let's go."

"Ah!" Francis pulled away, gripping Matthew by the shoulders and beaming. "We should tell him about us!"

Matthew stared at him briefly, then shook his head. "He already knows about us."

"What?" Francis continued to grin, apparently thinking it was some sort of joke.

"He knows about us. He's known for a long time." He hadn't planned on telling Francis, but... well, why not? Francis said nothing, staring at him in surprise, so Matthew plunged ahead. "I knew you were King before you told me. I found out when I was being dragged to my death!" He stepped away. "We were spotted together, and I was arrested, and they were going to kill me. But Alfred stumbled over us and stopped them, so that he could talk to Arthur. Arthur wasn't going to have me executed, but he was going to have me locked up for a nice long time." Francis' eyes widened over the course of the rushed story. "Unless I agreed to spy on you. So I did. The letters I kept sending home to Alfred had hidden messages in invisible ink. I didn't find out anything all that useful, but... I still went through your things, and listened to conversations, and told Arthur everything."

Francis gaped at him in quiet shock. Matthew could practically see his world crumbling. His heart hurt, but... maybe this was better, if Matthew was leaving.

To his surprise, Francis hugged him again. "What...?"

"I don't know why you're telling me this now," Francis murmured. "But you had no choice, did you? How can I be mad?"

By all the gods, did nobody care if Matthew spied on them?

"It's not like anything happened. Spades and Diamonds are allies now, no harm done."

"Right..." Matthew said. "You're really not mad? You still love me?"

"Of course I do!" Francis took Matthew's hand and squeezed it. "Okay, so we won't need to tell Arthur about us... But there are other things I think I would like to discuss with him..." he added, a tad darkly.

The trip between his room and the throne room had never felt more ominous. Matthew didn't want to talk about that with anybody, let alone Arthur. He knew he would lose it again – it was all he could do to hold it together when he was talking to the Spades soldiers. But he had to do it... This wasn't something Arthur should find out from a letter, or thirdhand from some random person who didn't care.

As soon as they walked in, Arthur barreled into Matthew, hugging him tight. Matthew almost fell over, quickly catching his balance and returning the hug. "Hi, Arthur. I'm back..."

"It's good to see you again," Arthur said, voice giddy. "I'm so glad you're all right. Can you believe it's over?"

"Not yet." So that answered that, he hadn't found out from somebody else.

Arthur released him, and hesitated at Francis. Then he laughed and hugged him, as well. He quickly stepped back, though, looking back and forth between them in surprise. "Um..."

Francis snorted. "I know you know we're together, you can stop wondering if you need to act shocked."

"O-oh." Arthur looked relieved by the news. "Well, then."

Francis' smile was not particularly friendly. "And one of these days we'll have to have a nice long talk about using my lover to spy on me."

Arthur actually looked startled, and even a little worried, but only briefly. Soon his sly expression mirrored Francis'. "Oh, indeed, I look forward to it. I'm eager to hear about why you opted to hide your identity from your lover, knowing full well that a citizen of the palace being seen with you would be charged with treason and handed a death sentence."

"Oh. Right." Francis' smile grew strained. "Well. Call it even?"

Arthur's answer was a smirk.

"Well, anyway." Francis cleared his throat. "Mathieu did want to speak with you about something."

"Ah, yes?" Arthur turned back to Matthew. All eyes were on him, and he wished he could just run away, but he had to do this.

Matthew took a deep breath. "It's..." His hands were shaking. Balling them into fists, he plunged ahead. I can do this. "Alfred..." That was all he was able to get out. Bursting into tears, Matthew returned to Francis' arms, burying his face.

It was all he needed to say.

After a long, hushed silence, Arthur must have looked at Francis for he shook his head. "I didn't know," Francis said softly. "He didn't say anything before." He stepped back, gripping Matthew by the shoulders and looking into his streaming eyes. "Mathieu, love, talk to me. What happened?" He swallowed. "A battle?"

Matthew nodded. "Yes. No. S-sort of..." He drew in a deep breath, but it didn't help much. "A Clubs soldier saw him and thought he was me. I don't think the soldier had any idea about my spying, but seeing 'me' with Spades soldiers made him think I was a traitor. But Al must have assumed the soldier did know about me, and he said that he was me to protect me... so the soldier..." He finally risked a glance at Arthur, who had covered his mouth with his hands and was staring into space with unfocused eyes.

"Mathieu..." Francis caressed Matthew's cheek, his expression full of sorrow. "I'm so sorry."

"Ivan found him," Matthew said, forcing himself to continue. "King Ivan, I mean. And of course he thought Al was me, and he killed the soldier who'd... done it." He shivered. "But he figured out it wasn't me, and Al gave him my scarf..."

Francis blinked. "Your what?"

"My scarf. You know." Matthew pulled it out, and Francis cringed away from the blood-encrusted silk. "Before we went to war, he gave me his watch, and I gave him my scarf." He also tugged out the watch. "I... you can have it." He held it out to Arthur, who gazed dully at it. He finally, hesitantly reached out to take it. He seemed to be in shock. He really did have a similar look to soldiers Matthew had seen who had lost limbs.

"And where... ah... where is he?" Francis asked delicately.

Matthew burst into tears again. "I don't know! After Ivan told me, I went to find him and he had already been taken away! I haven't seen him since he left the palace. I can't even bury him!"

"You didn't see him?" Arthur said, looking over sharply. "It might not be true, then."

Matthew shook his head. "Ivan wouldn't lie about that. He obviously saw him, he hadn't even known I had a brother. There's no way he could have known what the scarf would mean if Alfred hadn't given it to him! And... and I ran into some Spades soldiers who had seen him mortally wounded..."

"But..." Arthur looked desperately at the watch in his hands. Did Arthur know that Alfred had promised to come back for it?

Francis pulled Arthur into his arms, and Arthur broke down, and Matthew wished he could return to his room and hide. Instead, he curled up on Arthur's throne and hid his face. He knew he should have been helping to comfort Arthur, but he just couldn't handle any more grief.

A considerable amount of time passed like that. Matthew couldn't even hazard a guess how long; maybe hours. He was almost dozing.

"Mathieu?"

He looked up. Arthur was seated on the other throne, looking lost, and Francis stood before them. "Yes?"

"Where will you go now?"

"Somewhere." Matthew stood, grimacing at the stiffness in his legs. "Somewhere else, I don't know. I wish I could go far away, see the world, I was thinking about that when you found me... but I guess I can't. I have to stick with these few kingdoms that have doctors that could treat me." He sighed.

Francis pulled him close. "You will always have a place in Diamonds..."

Matthew nodded. "Thank you. But not just yet. I need a new life... But I'll come back some day." He kissed Francis as his lover looked more and more heartbroken. "I'd never leave you forever."

"If that is what you need," Francis said with a sad smile. "I will even try looking for a doctor who wouldn't mind seeing the world with you." He paused. "But maybe not a really attractive one. Another girl, maybe."

Matthew smiled back. "I won't take another lover."

"Nor will I," Arthur mumbled.

Francis glanced at him. "Do you-"

"Your Majesty?"

They all turned to the guard that had slipped into the room. "Yes?" Arthur said.

"The King of Clubs is here."

Arthur nodded, and the guard disappeared. He was soon replaced with Ivan, stepping hesitantly into the room.

"Your Majesty," Ivan greeted with a nod. "Er." He glanced at Francis. "Majesties. Oh my." He smiled at Matthew, still in Francis' arms. "You have many royal friends." Nobody said anything, and Ivan stepped closer, looking awkward. Matthew studied him, noting the telltale signs of Ivan's own grief. Even if their marriage hadn't been romantic, and he hadn't agreed with her on many things, he had still cared about his wife. He looked impressive, wearing an out-of-season fur-trimmed royal green robe instead of the soldier gear he had settled for during the war.

Arthur casually moved to his own throne, which Matthew had previously been occupying. "I'm sorry for your loss."

Ivan bowed his head. "Thank you. I'm sorry for yours."

Arthur winced and looked away. "Matthew says you're the only one who saw him," he said slowly. "Do you... swear? Is it true?"

"I'm sorry," Ivan said, looking up at him. "I swear. I saw him die."

"Okay." Arthur shuddered and fell silent, eyes bright with tears.

Ivan looked at each of them in turn. "I can come back later if this isn't a good time."

"Maybe that would be best." Arthur smiled wanly. "Now might not be the best time for negotiation. But you and whatever guards you've brought will be given rooms here..."

"All right." He hesitated, toying with a decorative clover on his cloak. "But I want to ask something first."

"Outside our negotiations?" Arthur's eyebrows lifted. "Go ahead."

Ivan took a deep breath. "I will be returning home without a Queen."

Arthur sighed. "I know. I'm sorry about that, but we-"

"I'm not blaming you," Ivan said quickly. "But I'd like to fix that. I'm looking for a new Queen. A good Queen everyone will like, and nobody will run in fear from. One who's smart, and caring, and brave..."

He trailed off into silence, and it took Matthew a moment to realize everyone was staring at him. "What?" He looked around, then gaped at Ivan. "You can't mean me!" Ivan only smiled, and Matthew shook his head wildly. "You're mad! I can't marry you. I mean, I do care about you, but as a friend, and..."

Ivan's smile did not waver. "Matvey, don't be silly, it's a royal marriage. I'm just looking for the best Queen." He tilted his head. "We would have to consummate the marriage, though, but nothing else."

Matthew turned to Francis in a panic, and the traitor looked thrilled. "What?" Francis said. "I don't mind, it would only be the one time. I've heard good things about him."

"Not that! He's lost his mind, I can't be Queen!"

"Why not?" Ivan said. "You're the smartest person I know."

"For one thing, I've never even been to Clubs!" He turned back to Ivan. "By the gods, I spied on you!"

Arthur flinched, but when Ivan didn't react, he groaned. "And a bloody awful spy, too, if you're confessing to everyone you spied on..."

"That's okay," Ivan said. "I don't mind. We won't tell anyone else, of course. But you showed all of the traits I'm looking for."

"I've never been to Clubs in my life," Matthew said desperately. "I can't rule it!"

"You'll learn." Ivan patted his shoulder. "Look how much you already know about it! Even I wouldn't have guessed you'd never been there."

"But... but they'll hate me." Matthew looked around, but found no help from the others. "The people will hate me, they won't want some foreigner ruling them."

"People are less picky about the Queen," Francis said. "It'll be a good idea to stick with the story you gave Ivan before and keep your lips sealed about spying on them, but I think they'll like you just fine. Especially once they've gotten to know you."

"Especially after the last one," Arthur muttered. "No offense."

Ivan gave him a dismissive wave.

"I don't know if I'd even like it there... though I did want to get away and start a new life." Matthew swallowed, and lifted his eyes to look at Francis. He seemed so pleased at the idea, didn't he realize what it meant? "I was planning on coming back someday, though. This would be forever, and I'd be twice as far from you as when I was in Spades."

"I know." Francis' expression grew serious. He reached out to take Matthew's hands. "But we will still see each other. And you deserve this... You know you wouldn't be happy living in Diamonds. I'll miss you terribly, of course, but I'll be thrilled to see you become a Queen." He touched Matthew's cheek. "Do you really want to spend the rest of your life as a consort, when you can get married and have a family? And jointly rule a kingdom..."

"You're just trying to convince yourself," Matthew said weakly.

"When you're royalty, you're used to not getting what you want when it comes to relationships." Francis smiled slightly. "We'll always have each other. We'll see each other. And we'll have spouses we at least get along with. And hey, at least yours won't have a sibling who will want to kill you for touching your spouse!" Behind them, Ivan coughed. "We'll be all right."

"I suppose so..."

"Just don't fall in love with him, okay?"

Matthew smiled slightly. When he thought about the future, he really couldn't picture himself living full-time in Diamonds as a consort.

Francis aside, though, the whole idea was utterly mad. He couldn't be the Queen of a kingdom he'd never been to, that had invaded his own home and caused his brother's death, that he had spied upon. He was sorely tempted to say no. If Alfred were there, he would say no. Matthew just wanted his old life back, living in the palace with Al, seeing Francis whenever he visited – the old, non-royal Francis whom Matthew dreamed about a future with.

But none of that could happen. And... well, why not? He wanted a new life; short of moving to the far side of the world, he couldn't get much newer. Matthew looked at Ivan. "All right. I'll do it."

Ivan looked surprised for a moment. The entire room grew very quiet. Then Ivan grinned and hugged Matthew. "Thank you." While Matthew continued to wonder what in the world he was doing, the other two joined the hug, squeezing Matthew and congratulating him.

"You'll be a wonderful Queen," Francis said.

Arthur murmured his agreement. "And maybe I could walk you down the aisle...?"

"You?" Francis protested.

"His lover would hardly be appropriate..."

"You both can," Matthew said. "Or maybe Tino instead..."

"Both of us, yes." Francis nodded quickly. "That would be a smart move, too. If anybody idoes/i protest you being Queen, it'll show that you have powerful allies. I know I wouldn't mess with somebody if it brought the wrath of three kingdoms down on me, no matter how much I disliked him."

Matthew smiled at them, slowly starting to wonder if maybe he hadn't made a terrible mistake. They all thought he would make a good Queen, and they would know. Maybe it really would work out...

He couldn't sleep. Matthew crawled out of Francis' embrace and slid off the bed. He grabbed a robe as he tiptoed out of the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

He got turned around on his way to the throne room, unused to reaching it from a different room. He found his way there eventually, finding it unoccupied. Undeterred, he tried the study next.

Arthur was seated on the couch, staring into the flames that crackled in the fireplace. Matthew dropped onto the couch beside him, scooting close and putting an arm around his shoulder. Arthur hesitated before wrapping an arm around Matthew and leaning his head on his shoulder. They remained like that in silence for several long minutes.

"I'm scared," Matthew finally said, voice hushed.

"Of becoming Queen?" Arthur said, and Matthew nodded. "Ah. I was, too." He gave Matthew a squeeze. "And you're a thousand times smarter than me, you'll be okay."

"It's not just being smart..."

"I know. But you'll still be okay."

"But what if-"

"You aren't marrying immediately. If you go there and just hate the kingdom, and everyone's nasty to you, you can always call it off. But I don't think that will happen. Everyone likes you."

Matthew smiled slightly. "Thank you. I guess I'll wait and see how it goes..."

They resumed staring into the fire for another long stretch, until Arthur's voice broke the silence again. "At least he thought he was protecting you. Protecting someone is how he would have wanted to... go..."

"Yeah. It is." Matthew sighed. "Though I'm sure he would have preferred something like... jumping in front of somebody and pushing them out of the way, taking the fatal strike that had been meant for them. And then dying heroically in their arms." Rather than alone, with only a stranger he likely hadn't even recognized to keep him company. But at least he had realized Ivan was friendly.

"Probably so." Another pause. "Tino says you're terrifying when you're pissed."

"Oh. Yeah. I didn't mean to scare him."

"Don't worry about it. I could say the same about him."

Matthew managed another smile. "I think I agree."

"Matt."

"Hm?"

"I don't know what to do, Mattie..." Arthur sounded like a lost child, and Matthew held him tighter, feeling him tremble. He had nothing comforting to say. He was still struggling, himself, he had no idea what could help Arthur. They clung to each other and cried for some time, until they were both worn out.

Matthew was almost dozing again when Arthur's voice snapped him awake. "Are you sure I can have this?"

"What?" Matthew glanced over at Arthur, his eyes landed on the familiar watch in his hands.

"It was your father's right?"

Matthew nodded. "I'm sure; you can. Oh, unless you want to trade? I also have a medal of his that I found in... well, that I found. Did you know he won a medal? You might like..." He trailed off as Arthur stiffened.

"I know. I presented it to him..."

"Oh." Matthew winced.

"Yeah. He really did deserve it, but it was also an excuse to go visit him, too."

They fell silent again, not really needing to speak, just comforting each other. Eventually, Arthur yawned widely, and Matthew finally pulled away to stand. "You should sleep. You're meeting with Ivan tomorrow, right?"

Arthur nodded, stifling another yawn. "I'm not too worried about future relations with Clubs." He slowly shook his head. "You're my friend... practically my brother. Francis' lover. And soon to be Ivan's husband. How in the world did you manage that?"

"I have no idea... It's something from a storybook. Not something that ever actually happens."

"I'm sure your own King and Queen of Hearts will like you once they meet you, too."

"Maybe so." Mathew hesitated. "Hey... do you want me to stay with you? I can sleep with you tonight. I mean... you know, sleep in the same bed. So you don't have to be alone."

Arthur gazed at him, considering. He finally shook his head. "Thank you for the offer, but no. I think I'd like to be alone some. And..." He looked away. "Well, no offense, but I don't think it would be good to wake up, tired and groggy, to find his face beside me."

"It's all right."

"Go back to Francis." Arthur made a face. "Just don't do anything with him."

Matthew snorted. He was reminded, then, of how silly Alfred was regarding that sort of thing. How he'd tease them about sex when they were all together, but when it was just him and Matthew, he'd show his true colors and try and convince himself Matthew and Francis were as chaste as possible. Apparently that was never going to end. "I won't. Good night, Arthur."

Arthur smiled up at him. "Good night, Your Majesty."