Lusamine threw the Poké Doll. Hard.
It bounced off the wall, and she paced the length of the room to retrieve it and throw it again, each time trying to throw even harder than the last. Sure, it'd give her a significant amount more satisfaction to toss something breakable, something that could shatter into tiny pieces that she could watch scatter in her violent wake, but doing so would be a shameful waste and hardly befitting of her.
So instead she kept throwing the Poké Doll, and it kept having no visceral feedback, no crack, no fissure opening in it, no satisfying thump of contact, hardly a smack against the wall. It was so deeply unfulfilling.
Lusamine had cleaned Lillie's room to postpone her pent-up rage's demands to be heard. The venom, the vomit and the sweat were mopped up and removed as best as possible, Lusamine putting all the effort she could into the manual labor. She wasn't used to the physical workload and indeed in five minutes of crawling on her hands and knees, the stench making her retch, she had a flaring pain in her back and her palms felt numb from where she'd propped herself up on them. This wasn't her, this hadn't been her realm, this was strange, but it was enough to distract her.
But now she was on two feet again, where she belonged, where she was strong, and where she could express the typhoon of enraged helplessness. It was helplessness that drove her to this - throwing about the Poké Doll she had given Lillie on her first birthday.
"YOU FUCK! YOU FUCKING- YOU- WHY COULDN'T YOU STOP ME? WHY COULDN'T YOU TELL ME?!" Everything was in ashes, and for all her intelligence, for all her businesslike manner and image, for all that she had done to hide her nature and her machinations, it was gone. "Look upon my works, and despair," she quoted to herself as the violent surge left her. The golden 'glitter' present in the air of the house seemed to have vanished with the rest of the illusions, abandoning her now that it knew a collapse was imminent.
Sun was still absent, and Lusamine wondered if he'd up and left. He couldn't be blamed if he had. Sun was working on whatever pseudoscience he could cook up to open a portal without harming the Cosmog. His naivety was charming, but pointless. Lusamine loved Pokémon. She had tried to find a way to open the portal herself without killing the Cosmog and had come up short. Pokémon... Pokémon.
She still had things to set right.
She rushed down into the catacombs beneath her home in a state where she did not know exactly where she was or what she was doing. Not a trance, she was conscious and self-aware, but all she knew was that this had to be done now before she could come up with an excuse to not go through with it. Reaching the centre platform and bringing up the holographic panel to access all the local systems, with a trembling hand she entered the first four letters of her password. Without her command, her fingers folded inward, preventing her from typing any further. Instead of the blue projections being the focus of her attention, the empty plinth where Nihilego had once been contained drew her eyes.
"Revenge," Lusamine muttered to herself. "Revenge."
Back to typing the final four letters. It bought her a savage pleasure, knowing she'd end that creature soon while on some sort of crazy sortie into its territory. She wouldn't let Sun come with her. She had to do this alone to atone as best she could, go and attempt to rescue Lillie by herself and let Sun get on with his life. This nightmare was hers to endure. It was of her creation and of her design. Now a solitary finger hung over the button that would unfreeze all the Pokémon, with the intent to rectify what was wrong.
She pressed the button, stuffing any reservations she had down. With a hiss, the past rose again... for a brief moment.
Sun had tried everything he could. He'd researched every last fact on Cosmog he could find, and was entirely blank. He'd been around every wing of the Foundation and recorded how it interacted with other Pokémon, and with each type biome. Yet still there were no results: no strong bursts of energy, no larger wisps of star-smoke.
He'd taken Nebby back down to the atrium, and was going to ask the President if she'd help him study the Cosmog. Sun was unable to place the conflicting emotions inside him at rest regarding Lusamine. He isolated himself from thoughts about the President by catering to Nebby.
"They called you..." Sun said as he softly pushed the gaseous stardust in concentric patterns, "the child of the stars."
Nebby squealed in response and rubbed against Sun's wrist. While Nebby's antics made him happy, a chill slithered through his body. Sun could feel some sort of intent, malevolence, glanced up from Nebby to meet the gaze, and saw Faba staring from across the atrium. The moment their eyes met Faba began to march toward him, Sun taking a few steps away, searching for an escape: none presented itself to him. In no time the Branch Manager was scowling at him face to face.
"Boy, what are you doing here?" Faba asked him, and the irritation in Faba's voice put Sun even more on edge. "And with that Pokémon, too! Shouldn't you be at home with your mother?" Sun could tell from Faba's tone that the man had always been itching to tell him the truth.
"Um, I- I'm allowed here... I have to be... be here..." Sun saw people hesitating, tourists and guests both. He didn't want a scene over this, he just wanted to curl up and hide away. Commotion, noise he couldn't understand, scared him.
Faba's eyes narrowed behind insectoid glasses. "And if I ask your mother, she will say the same?"
"Y- yes..." Sun tried to stay calm but the idea that Faba was suddenly going to drag him away and put that device on his head again was burning into his mind with stark clarity. He would be strapped down and writhe and scream to no avail as he forgot everything again. "Yes, she will."
"Hmph." Faba didn't look like he was convinced by Sun's response. He turned to the side briefly. "The Cosmog... was it just used to open a portal?"
Sun didn't reply, looking at the ground, afraid, mumbling to himself.
"Answer me, child! Do not act so insolent!"
"Y- yes, it was!" Sun hugged Nebby against his chest and the Cosmog placed both wispy arms against him in a mock cuddle of its own.
"And what happened? I recognised the signs of atmospheric disturbance. What happened?!" Faba was raising his voice and Foundation employees were rushing to guide the public away from the disturbance he was causing.
Sun wanted to run straight back to the mansion, thinking he'd be safer there - one of his voices, one of his interpretations of what was real, second-guessed him, reminding him that everything here was dangerous. "Um, I don't think I should-"
"Listen, boy, you'll tell me or I'll drag you back to that house and see for myself." Faba looked like he loomed over Sun when in reality he was the shorter of the two and Sun was shrinking away, crouching down defensively, scared.
"I'll- I'll tell miss- mother," he corrected himself, but Faba noticed the slip up. It was becoming increasingly difficult for Sun to keep his story straight.
"Miss? You refer to her as- wait- you're not..." Faba had a nervous tic in his eye. Sun was ready to bolt the moment Faba suggested something. "You're remembering."
Faba moved before Sun did, catching Sun's wrist in a surprisingly strong grip. "Let me go- let me-" as Sun struggled Nebby floated by his waist, trying to hide behind him. Faba, aware of the problems he would generate if too many people noticed him wrestling with Sun, released him.
"You'll come with me, boy, or you'll regret it." Faba spoke down to Sun. Sun, still resilient, shook his head.
"You don't understand- my mother, she-"
The last Faba had heard Lillie had been planning to take Lusamine away to Ultra Space. Sun had the Cosmog and was no longer in the President's presence - so Lillie's plan must have worked. Jumping to this conclusion, Faba deduced that now was the time to be rid of Sun. "I understand," Faba interrupted, hustling to promote himself to President in the interpreted power vacuum. "But if she's gone, we need to-"
"She's gone?" Sun asked. "What do you mean? Lillie-"
"Yes, yes, I know," Faba interrupted again. "Now, we had better see about hiding the President's mistakes-"
"W- wait, no-"
"-and that means that you, boy, should be disposed of."
Sun wished that he'd brought a Silvally with him. "No- my mother is fine, she's-"
"Then what happened?!"
"Lillie's gone! She got taken through the portal!" Sun tried to explain to Faba, and the Branch Manager heard the words 'Lillie' and 'portal', and ignored everything else, overjoyed that Lusamine might finally be gone. He cackled with delight. "Come now," Faba demanded, but before he could act further he was interrupted by another voice.
"Excuse me, Faba." The speaker was Wicke, and Sun was relieved to see her. She approached clutching a datapad to her chest, and greeted Sun with a smile and a wave.
"Hello, Sun."
"H-hi," Sun said, managing a nervous smile of his own now she had come to his aid. There were so many people who knew, who could blow this out of proportion and ruin everything for both him and Lusamine. Not ruin- but it was difficult to tell what others wanted, what they could get from the situation. Sun should be seeking as much help as possible but felt that he needed to keep Lusamine's secrets. "Miss Wicke, my mother, she-" Sun didn't know where he was going with this - surely the less people knew what had happened, the better.
"Yes, yes," Faba spoke over Sun. "The president has vanished-"
"No she hasn't!" Sun exclaimed. "She hasn't!"
Wicke shot a sidelong glance at Faba. Sun considered the web of lies and deceit he was tied up in and how much he should know compared to how much he did know. There had to be a way to solve this. "What's happened, Sun?" Wicke asked gently. There was pity in her voice, but also a great deal of honesty and care. Sun knew that she only meant well for him, and appreciated her concern.
"She's fine. It's fine. There's nothing wrong," he lied. There was so much wrong. Wicke could help him. Wicke could get him out of here and away from Lusamine. Sun wanted to blurt it all out but he couldn't, he had to save Lillie first-
"Then, I have to ask, what are you doing out here?" She put her index and middle finger against the right hinge of her glasses and peered down at him. "I'm sure your mother is very worried about you."
"No, she knows I'm here, she knows-" Sun protested. He didn't want to go back to the mansion without a solution for the Nebby problem. "Miss Wicke, it's okay. Everything is fine."
"I doubt it," Faba said. "I think the atmospheric disturbance was a result of a portal being opened and your 'mother' passing through it."
"Excuse me, Faba-"
"That's Branch Manager Faba, Wicke-"
"Branch Manager Faba, please, let me talk with Sun." Wicke sidled slightly closer to Sun, knowing Faba had nothing good planned for him.
"Very well," Faba replied. He'd bide his time until the President's vanishing was official - the actual content of the conversation had been mostly ignored by him so confident was he in Lillie's success. "Wicke, I trust that you will explain what happened later," he added.
"Yes, Branch Manager Faba." As the scientist sloped away Wicke exhaled a heavy breath and faced Sun. "Now, Sun, what happened? We know something occurred from the storm that started to brew. Thankfully it was dispersed as quickly as it began."
Sun blinked. He opened his mouth to speak, but didn't say a word. Wicke leaned down a little, placing her hands on her knees to be at eye level with him, crouching slightly due to her heels. "Sun, if something is wrong, you'll let me know, correct?" He nodded at her question. "So, please, if there is anything I can help you with..."
"P-please..." Sun shivered and tentatively came closer. "T-take me home..."
"Back to the President?" Wicke asked.
Sun could leave. He could tell her right now to take him back to Melemele island and escape, be free, be himself again, lie down and sleep in his own bed if it was still intact. He hoped against hope that his real mom was still alive and that he could see her again.
The only thing holding him back was that saying that meant abandoning Lillie. While she had hurt him and raped him, she was still his friend, and it wasn't her fault.
"B-back to the president," Sun decided. "Back to my... my mother." He offered his hand. Wicke's eyebrows knotted with concern at the attitude he took, treating her like a parent too. She calmly took it, trying not to let that disquiet show, hoping that Sun would relax. Faba was overbearing and could be very intimidating, especially to a child like Sun.
"Come on then, Sun, let's go back to your mother." Wicke heard him sniffle and glanced back down at him. Little streaks ran down his face - he was crying. "Sun? What's the matter?"
"I don't want to be here anymore," he admitted to her, now not even caring if what he said got him into trouble. He hugged her waist, openly crying aloud now. "I don't want to-"
"Sun, do you want me to call for your mother?" Wicke wasn't sure what to do - Lusamine's madness had been kept to the President herself, and the methods she used to control and understand Sun were for her to know and her alone. Wicke had never wanted any part in this. She felt conflicted - she didn't know if she should hug Sun back or if she should reprimand him for being so clingy.
"I- I-" Sun sobbed, holding onto her as if she was all that existed. Thankfully, they had moved out of the atrium and back toward Lusamine's abode, no longer in public. With every short, delayed step that Wicke could wheedle Sun into taking, his mental collapse seemed all the more pronounced. Finally, Sun could go on no longer and fell to the deck of the Paradise in a heap, Nebby crying out with fear at his sudden fall.
Sun moaned and continued to cry as he-
"What- what do you want with me?" Sun choked into the white platform. There was a thin film of water on the deck of the Paradise which just made the experience of lying flat on his front, face down, all the more uncomfortable.
-figured out what to do to stop all the crashing and rolling riptides of trauma that wracked his damaged frame and made his sanity sway in the winds of fear. He had to at least briefly believe the lie again, and he'd feel comfortable, go back to being normal, relaxed.
Sun felt some kind of movement being forced onto him as he tried to arrange his memories into neat folders and boxes inside his head so that Aether Sun couldn't permanently claim him again. He wasn't prepared to lose all that he was another time, but knew it'd hurt even worse if he kept on in this state. Sun couldn't handle this stress, but Aether Sun could, because he didn't care. Sun was binary, not one, but two - and tried to manually flip the switch for the first time. To give Aether Sun some kind of control.
"Ack-" Sun's hand spread flat on the deck as a jolt of something lit up his spine. The white surface was warm and welcoming, and he almost wanted to stay where he was until Wicke could scrape him back up and keep him going - but he had a new purpose. The tears stopped, as he couldn't understand what he had even been crying for.
"Sun? Do you-"
"I'm okay!" He sat up again, rubbing his head. "Where were we going?" Nebby did a little circle of his head, chirping as it did. Sun's head followed it around until he could no longer twist his neck any further, and almost got whiplash from how fast he turned to see Nebby emerge from behind him. "Hi, Nebby." He caught Nebby from the air and cuddled it.
"Sun?" Wicke asked. Her inflection was still even but a slight shake betrayed her worry for Sun's health.
"Yes, miss Wicke?" He got back up to his feet, with a big smile as he rocked Nebby back and forth in his hands. "Miss Wicke?" Sun blinked at her.
"Um... let's hurry along... to your... your mother." Wicke didn't need to hold his hand anymore - Sun was jogging ahead, giggling to himself. Nebby sang alongside him. Wicke followed at her own pace - thinking of choice words to say to the President when she saw her. Wicke would take matters into her own hands if she had to with no regrets. It was the right thing to do.
Sun barged through the mansion's double doors, exclaiming, "Mother! I'm back!"
Lusamine glanced up from her hands, mouth agape. The trauma of dealing with all of the immobile, unresponsive Pokémon had been far too much for her to bear, disposing of them in Poké Balls, putting them in the PC system that she detested so.
Having only just emerged from the crypt she'd once thought of as a trophy room, sat in against the wall with the mirror concealing the passage to her right, she was screaming and beating her fists into the floor as she wailed and spit wildly. Consequence was not something she was used to dealing with, and she knew only one way to handle it - this. Flipping out and breaking things, letting off an explosion of the untamed vicious urges that she had to keep inside for too long, not knowing who or what to blame.
Sun had just called her 'mother' again, though, and whatever had happened to him to make that change she was grateful for. There was something deeply ingrained in him that she had recognised and tried to exploit, so that she could keep him - no, not keep, that was too... too predatory - so that she could look after him still. So she had to make herself presentable.
She pushed herself up off of the floor, patting down her dress and glancing toward the origin of the shout. Lusamine quickly peered into the mirror, clutching at its edge with a little too much force and nearly prying open the passage again. Noticing red marks under her eyes, she gently dragged her index fingers over the underside of her eye sockets. It wouldn't change anything, but it was impulse, and she was very susceptible to impulse.
Swiping her hair habitually she steadied her breathing and went to meet him. "I- I'm right here, Sun-" no sooner had she pushed the door open and caught a glimpse of him before he was on the move.
"Mother-" Sun cried and rushed toward her.
Lusamine caught him in her arms, transferring the momentum of his movement into her hold and turning on her heels before clutching him in a very paternal way.
"Why- oh, Sun," Lusamine smiled. "What is it?" What had brought on this change? Had he made a conscious choice to ignore the truth and let himself believe the lie? If that was true, by Arceus, all her problems were as good as solved.
"I just- I got- scared- and, and-"
"By what? What's wrong?" Lusamine was wondering what could have made him rush back to her. He knew the truth, he'd already expressed that to her, already made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with her. As she hugged Sun tighter, trying to envelop him and save him from whatever it was that had Sun frightened, the President noticed the other figure in the room. "Wicke? What happened?"
"It was the Branch Manager. You know how overbearing he can be." Faba. Lusamine's face visibly darkened. "Miss President, we have to talk."
"Can it wait?" Lusamine's eyes flitted to Sun, before returning to Wicke's face. Wicke understood - the President wanted Sun to be happy - or wanted to be alone with Sun for whatever reason, the full gamut of potential making Wicke shiver - before anything else, but they had to discuss Sun immediately. This was pushing Wicke's boundaries. What she'd witnessed was schizophrenia, induced in a child by the level of torment he'd faced.
"No, no we can't. Miss President, this is important." Wicke gestured, impatient. She couldn't deal with Lusamine's lax attitude right now. "Sun, you don't mind if I speak to your mother, do you?"
"No, miss Wicke." Sun squirmed briefly in Lusamine's arms and nuzzled her shoulder. Lusamine patted him on the back and allowed herself a smile before letting him go.
"Sun, why don't you go to your room while we talk and you can tell me what you found out about Nebby when we're done?" Sun nodded with a radiant look, and taking Nebby by one of the stumpy appendages he rushed up the stairs. The Cosmog squealed as it was dragged along by Sun's enthusiasm.
Wicke placed her hands on her hips, angrily demanding Lusamine's attention. The President recognised the no-nonsense demeanor and crossed her arms. "So, what is it?"
"Sun is - I can't explain what I saw. But it was like he was - was two people. One of them was afraid, he was scared, he didn't want to move - he said 'take me home,' and 'I don't want to be here anymore.' You know what I said about this sick experiment. I can't act along anymore." Wicke's voice was unusually rugged and accusatory. Lusamine was used to hearing her voice in a softer, more introductory context, speaking to guests and tourists.
"What are you going to do?" Lusamine asked, trying to keep any idea of challenge out of her voice to keep the conversation amicable. Her effort was in vain however, and the 'you' escaped her mouth with the faintest barb to the word.
"I'll contact the-"
"Don't- don't-" Lusamine's composure instantly fell apart. "You can't do that, I won't- you don't understand, he's remembering-"
"You'll do the right thing then? If he's remembering the best thing to do is to turn yourself in-"
Lusamine's emotions were on a cresting wave, rising and ready to smash and crash her fragile idea of getting away with it all. "No, no, he's still - he's still mine, I can still control him-"
"Miss President, if you do not act I will be forced to." Wicke had fucking betrayed her. Sun could still be tamed and made safe, and made into her son, he needed to be for his own wellbeing. Taking him away would hurt him, Lusamine was certain. The way he'd just acted told her that even if he was schizophrenic that he, or a piece of him, still adored her. She'd wrap up that piece and nurture it until it consumed him once again, forevermore.
"Wicke, did you not see how he loves me?" Lusamine had to defuse her Vice President before she did something that she'd regret. "He is still-"
"You didn't see him. He was crying, sobbing, I had to pull him with me before his personality flipped." Wicke was exaggerating, Lusamine decided. Sun was emotional, but he wouldn't do that. He wouldn't. "He fell to the deck and then just like that he was off, rushing right back."
"Then he needs me! He cannot - he cannot be separated from me, I am his-"
"You are insane!" Wicke's words went straight over Lusamine's head. "He is a child-"
"He's a teenager-" Lusamine argued pathetically.
"-and you have torn him apart! No wonder you haven't let him leave your house in- in weeks!" Wicke scowled. "I'm going to take this into my own-"
"-NO! DON'T TAKE HIM AWAY!" Silence settled on the room like dust, scattering in a light blanket. A heartbeat of time passed in which both women thought about the other's priorities and allegiances. "Don't take him away."
"Miss President, have you ever heard the expression, 'if you love something, let it go?' Sun is hurt. This game of yours is all over." Wicke couldn't understand how she'd ever let Lusamine do what she did, turning a blind eye to Sun. That mistake had to be rectified, now, with or without the President's approval.
"Wicke, I can't just let him go. You- you don't know what's been happening. Lillie- oh, Arceus, Wicke, it's a mess..."
"You're right it's a mess. It's time to clean it up." Wicke was speaking in the tone that Lusamine was accustomed to again, and she was now closer to the President. "You need to take action now."
"Wicke- there's something going on, I can't explain it, but- I need- I need three days." Lusamine wouldn't let Sun go without trying to save Lillie first, because that was Sun's plan, and he'd already made it clear he intended to be the one to put it into action.
Wicke didn't for a second change her stance. "No, miss President. No, you can't have three days. You can't have any more time. This is over, Sa- Lusamine."
"Wicke, you don't understand. My- Arceus, Wicke, the... you... how do I explain this?"
"I have all the time in the world."
Lusamine took a deep breath and her toxic green eyes sharpened.
"So, what did you find out about Nebby?" Sun gave Lusamine an anxious look in response. That concerned her - she'd expected him to find something, some way to get through to Nebby and have it willingly open a portal. But that look - that look told her that no, even with all of his practical talent that he'd picked up he had no answer for their problem.
"Mother, I don't know how to- I tried a few things, but we don't have long, but I don't want to hurt Nebby... please - can we have a bit longer?"
Arceus fucking damn it.
Wicke had agreed to meet Lusamine halfway once Lusamine had explained her situation (not entirely truthfully), but that left her and Sun without much time. They only had until they brought Lillie back, which was something the real Sun had wanted - to be rid of Lusamine as soon as possible after saving Lillie.
So it was possible. If she just let him go, she could get away with it all.
But she didn't want to let him go.
If Lillie was dead, then what she would do was up in the air. She couldn't release Sun if that was the case - what was she to do? Relive the intense, howling loneliness that came to her when her children abandoned her? Never again. That had made her turn even further to Nihilego and bury herself in its limbs and poison. It had made her make Sun.
The ordeal had already taken enough of a toll on her mental state, enough to leave her stunned and confused at the smallest things - she was once a mindful, contemplative person, but now everything was 'act on instinct', because there was never the time to think or consider her options.
"Sun, we can't wait for this. We can't, not while Lillie's in danger."
"B-but, mother, if we- I don't want to hurt it," he said and gestured to Nebby. By now it was evening and the small glow that Nebby emanated was more pronounced, the impression that the look gave it one of vulnerability, one that made Lusamine not want to kill it. They had to.
"Sun, if we don't act quickly then Lillie might-"
"B-but we can't hurt Nebby... what would she think?" Sun peered up at her with wide eyes.
"She would think that we went to the ends of the earth to save her and did what we had to do."
Something about the sentence caused a reaction in Sun that snapped him out of the mode he was in. He retched suddenly, making Lusamine flinch. As if his head was coming up from the depths of the sea, he leaned back and gulped down oxygen with loud and rattling heaves. "Agh- oh," he managed, lowering his head again and placing it against the palm of his hand. "You can't... can't even begin to know what you've... what you've done to me." His voice was deep and throaty, damaged. He was broken.
"Wicke explained-"
"Wicke doesn't know what happened. I had to- I had to manually- I had to make myself into that other- I had to switch my personality. I was scared." Sun wasn't looking at her. "Everything- all the pressure, all the- the fear... I had to believe the lies you told me to cope." Sun knew what that meant. If he was allowed to leave, he may not even want to as a result of this. He had a horrible, conflicting addiction to her.
"Sun, just... just go now. I'll take care of everything, I'll save Lillie-"
"Firstly I don't trust you to, and secondly the Silvally don't trust you either." Sun still hadn't met her eyes, which were regarding him with sadness. "We're not killing Nebby."
"We have to."
"No, we don't, there has to be another way-"
"When I was twenty-seven, Sun, I was looking for a way to bridge the gap. When I was thirty-seven, I found a way, a way that was inhumane, that I wasn't proud of, and that I paid a terrible price for using. I lost... things, things I'll never get back." Lusamine had never talked about the incident since it happened. She'd always avoided the topic when speaking to anyone regardless of their status or position in her Foundation.
"Things you'll never get back?" Sun asked.
"Yes."
"Like... like what?" Sun pried.
"Sun, please-"
"You must have been married-" he began to think out loud.
"SUN!" Lusamine screamed at him. "Sun, you- I love you, but..."
"What would he think about-"
"SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP, SUN!" Lusamine threw one of the empty cups of Tapu Cocoa that were strewn on Sun's desk at the wall and again there was no satisfying feedback, nothing to curb that thirst to see something snap and shatter under her force. Because of this lack of response, she grabbed another and threw that too. Sun stayed frozen in place. "LISTEN TO ME FOR FUCKING ONCE! DON'T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT- ABOUT-"
She stopped, having seen how Sun was sitting. He was completely still, shellshocked by her outburst. She immediately regretted her eruption, as she had with many before it. "Sun, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"
Sun didn't respond, staring into the middle distance with his right hand clutching his left shoulder as he gently rocked back and forth.
"Come on, Sun, what are you doing now?" Lusamine continued to be bemused by behaviours like this. "I'm sorry, I said I was sorry..." she moved to be closer to him and touched his forearm gently. Sun didn't react to the contact.
Lusamine put out both arms and closed them around him gradually so that if he wanted he could tell her not to, but Sun didn't say a word. In fact, once she had him held tight, the verticality of his spine, how straight he was sitting, became less robotic, less formal, relaxing.
"Sun... I know that... I'm not a good person. But... you know that... I care, right? Right?"
Sun's gaze was heavy and condemning. He didn't speak. Very gradually, centimetre by centimetre, he leaned into her.
Lusamine, invisible to him now that he was resting against her, smirked. He could be controlled. Kept tight, kept close. He could still belong to her, if she could negotiate with Wicke. The Vice-President had put her in a difficult position, but Lusamine was President because she solved problems.
"Oh, Sun... I'll never let you go."
"Hmmm..." Sun sighed into her dress. "Mother..."
"That's right." Lusamine devoured the moment, thinking about every sense, every little element of the scene that she was the lead actress in.
There was touch - Sun's shirt and the tiniest part of his skin, her hand at the apex of the transition between fabric and Sun's bare body. Slightly coarse, yet after the transition pliable and yielding. Warm against her.
Sight - she saw him and only him, he was the object of her every want and need. The obsession that she'd tried to deny was now all that drove her forward. She saw where her hair, which fell haphazardly around her seat, was nearest his and observed that they still had the exact same hair colour. His glorious blue eyes and how they seemed larger than life and at the same time like lasers. Curiosity, courage and character.
The only sounds were Sun's hardly audible purrs and mumblings and the white noise of the Alolan sea. Lusamine zeroed in on the former, paying attention to each vague syllable Sun spoke. "Mm... sq... uf... hnh..." this cascade of unfocused joy brought Lusamine great pleasure to hear. He must truly adore her to be reduced to this in her presence. Before she had finished cataloguing her senses a familiar, sickly sensation bathed her in chill.
'Take him. Take him now. One final time. You didn't get the time you wanted, the time you deserved... you made him for a reason...'
Lusamine's fingers spasmed. Her hands moved very gradually into positions where she could hold Sun with more finesse and force a little more onto him. "Mmm..." Sun mumbled, and Lusamine's broiling darkness began to overflow. The breaths she took echoed in her emptying skull, reducing her to hunger and desire. "Mother... mommy..."
Lusamine hesitated. Her sensibilities returned to her. "I'm here, Sun. I'm here." Her hands moved back to their original positions, and where for a moment her eyes had been razor sharp and ready to pierce they were now closed in silent shame. "You're safe."
"Hmmm..."
She kissed his forehead, and Sun smiled.
"Sun, I'm going to let you go now, and we'll talk about Nebby."
"Mhm." The two parted. Sun blinked a few times, and returned to normal quickly. "Nebb- Nebby... I don't want to... to hurt it."
Lusamine had to make Sun understand that there was no other option open to them. She ran her tongue over her lower lip, thinking of the words she'd need to use. "Sun, we can't always have what we want."
Sun ruffled Nebby's gaseous body under his hand. "You made me into what you wanted."
Lusamine sidestepped the meaning of the statement. "We'll make Nebby into what we need it to be, too." She was only two words into the sentence before concluding that it was the wrong thing to say, but her mouth was on autopilot.
Sun shook his head vehemently. "Mo- Miss Lusamine, Nebby isn't just a tool for us to use whenever we want! I thought that we both loved-" Sun stopped himself, remembering all the frozen Pokémon he had seen before she'd changed him. If she loved Pokémon as she claimed, then she loved them too much. Sun reconsidered. "I love Pokémon too much to-"
"Sun..." Lusamine's tone brokered no argument, but she was still trying to let him down easy. "We've wasted enough time as it is."
"I can-"
"Sun. We'll use the machine, and Nebby will die. If the portal isn't destabilised, it'll remain open long enough for us to pass through and find her. We'll take Nebby with us and use it to exit."
"There are a hundred things that could go wrong with that plan-"
"-then don't come." Lusamine was leaning forward in her seat. "It's my family-"
"She's my friend, and I thought you wanted me to be your-"
"Sun, I was insane!" Lusamine tried to make him understand, tried to let him know what felt like her and what felt like it and what felt like all the others in her head demanding and craving things that would ruin her - and as she thought about those others, they spoke up in unison, in choir, and the pain made her clutch at her forehead. She faced the ground.
"You are insane!"
Lusamine's eyes rolled upwards, back to Sun, with her head still down. "Yes. But I can live with it."
Sun was a kid, ultimately. All the same, he understood what she meant, and could still argue his point. "I couldn't live with you being crazy. You wouldn't let me live. You made him." It was inching closer to that harsh, dark future she'd seen in her subconscious, recognising the other sides of himself and referring to them all as'him', gradually becoming schizophrenic and confused himself.
He was her perfect son after all - she'd always been afraid to make him like her in mentality, but here he was, with her mannerisms, her struggles with other halves and other wholes. At the same time he was her antithesis.
He had patience, he had innocence. He was clever and compassionate where she was intelligent and manipulative. As they came together in mental state, they drifted apart in appearance. The only resemblance between them was hair colour.
"I did make him. And I loved him. And I love you too much to put you at risk."
Sun's expression didn't change, but the shine of his eyes told her about his change in emotion. "I have to do this."
"Then we have to kill Nebby."
Alola fell silent in moratorium, or so it would seem. Even the sea hushed; if only for a brief time.
Nebby cheerfully 'pewed', making Sun look away. Lusamine did feel bad about what they had to do, but she knew that Nebby's death was the prerequisite to save Lillie. "Sun, I'll handle Nebby. You need to train the Silvally group."
"O-okay," Sun mumbled, and his voice quaked, his eyes shimmered. His breath wobbled. A shaking hand gathered the trio of Poké Balls from his desk and hovered by Nebby for a moment. Sun put the spheres back down and raised Nebby in his hands, hugging it tight. "I... I'm sorry," he whispered, and Nebby, not understanding, hugged him back. Sun let go and grabbed the Poké Balls again. He quickly went to get out of the room, and Lusamine understood why.
"Miss Lusamine, how should I get them to track Lillie?" Sun asked.
"There's a Poké Doll she had since she was little. They can... they can pick up her scent from that. It's in her room."
Sun left.
An hour and a half later, night had devoured Alola. The time was soon approaching.
Lusamine had never originally been concerned with returning to reality after journeying to Ultra Space, but it was still possible. Once the Cosmog was dead, torn apart by the torturous and convulsive current of electricity, then the case it was in would yield a fully charged 'battery' of Cosmog's energy. This 'battery' could be destroyed and create a 'return' portal for a brief time.
Lusamine was glad that there was at least something they could use. It'd take too long to develop something new, and if they failed... hopefully Nihilego wouldn't know how to get through the portal. The last time she'd tried to get to Nihilego it had caused portals to appear all across Alola, but it was possible to prevent that with certain buffers. At the time, Lusamine had been looking to spread the infection, not prevent it - and had been so blasted by the venom she hadn't cared about collateral damage.
She encouraged Nebby into the case, but didn't switch it on, listening to its confused bumbling inside. Lusamine sighed. "Arceus, I'm sorry." Sun was in the room with her, and wasn't looking. He was too afraid.
"Do we have to do this?"
"Yes. For Lillie."
"...for Lillie."
"Sun, I'm going to save Lillie alone. You don't deserve to be hurt by that thing if it goes wrong. I have to keep you safe."
"I've already said, I'm coming. I beat Nihilego before! I can-"
"I have my Pokémon." It was true. She had her own battling team ready. It was more ceremonial than serious, but she knew that her team had the potential to deal serious damage against any threat. She could do it.
"Miss Lusamine, I have the things you built to kill Ultra Beasts."
"Then give them back."
Sun hugged the nearest Silvally - they were roaming around outside of their Poké Balls. The chimera nuzzled him and crooned, giving him an exceptionally light headbutt. "N-no, I'm going with you, and I'm taking them with us. They won't listen to you."
Lusamine frowned. "Sun, please-"
"I'm not going to change my mind, miss Lusamine-"
"-what if I make you change your mind?"
Sun's throat dried out and he licked his lips. "Then I'd tell everyone what you did."
Lusamine had a choice. A significant one.
She could do right by Sun, protect him, keep him safe, and be rightly punished for what she had done if she returned alive.
Or she could let him come, put him at risk, and dodge the consequences of her actions - at least for longer than she would if she did make Sun stay.
The President of the Aether Foundation ran her fingers over the black case Nebby was inside, and it could be heard snoring. Her nails slid against the surface with a smooth 'skrrrrrrrrrrrrr'.
Sun was watching her intently. His hand was idly stroking the mane of the Silvally he had hugged, but it too seemed more interested in the conflict than Sun's touch.
Lusamine swept her hair to the right. Sun unintentionally mimicked her.
"Fine. Let's... let's go."