I would like to thank everyone who has taken the time to review. I apologize in advance for the length of this chapter but it turned out to be necessary. I hope you enjoy it. Please don't forget to review so we can keep Musie a happy camper.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Booth was out the door after his wife like a shot, his argument with Alex forgotten, all his attention focused of catching up with Brennan and finding out what was wrong. There was no doubt in his mind that something was very, very wrong but she was going to have to tell him what it was because he didn't have a clue. He knew things were a little touchy between them right now but he thought he had reassured her that everything was going to be ok, that they had reached the turning point and everything was definitely ok after their blowup. He guessed it was possible that was the problem but he didn't think so. He also thought it was possible she had thought he and Alex were going to fight and break a promise to her but he would have expected her to be angry and yell about that, not look sad and defeated. His heart clenched as he recalled the look in her eyes. He had never, ever expected to see that kind of look on the face of his stubborn, indomitable wife and found himself vowing to do whatever was necessary to make sure he never did again. He didn't even notice that all four soldiers were hot on his heels. He did notice that Brennan was moving pretty damned swiftly because she was already out of sight when they entered the hallway and trotted down the corridor. They came into sight of the briefing room and General Hood waved them toward the door with a congenial smile. Booth did no more than glance into the room and turn away when he saw Brennan wasn't present.
"Have you seen my wife?" Booth demanded of a startled Hood.
"Of course, Agent Booth, we spoke with your wife at length a short time ago," Hood answered, looking at Booth as if he had lost his mind.
"He means right now. Did you see Red come this way just before us?" Alex clarified and Hood shook his head.
"Could you have missed her?" Grant demanded. Hood looked at the concern on the men's faces and his lingering amusement over the tongue lashing Brennan had likely given Alex and Booth faded to be replaced by mild disquiet.
"I suppose it's possible but it is highly doubtful," Hood answered briskly. "Am I to assume that Dr. Brennan is missing?" The five men looked at each other then back at Hood, certain that what they were thinking was crazy. She couldn't have been more than a minute in front of them and, even thought it appeared that she had vanished into thin air, they all knew that was impossible. They also knew there was no way someone could get into the embassy unnoticed much less snatch her silently and spirit her away in that length of time. It just wasn't possible. That meant she was on the premises. Somewhere. They just had to find her.
Hood turned back into the room and informed the other 3 men that the debriefing that would have to be rescheduled. Turning back toward the hallway, he found Booth already taking the stairs two at a time and the other four splitting up and heading in different directions to, apparently, search for the good doctor. Going to the phone, he quickly verified from the guards at the gate that she had not left the premises and was more relieved than he would have thought to find out that he was correct.
He hadn't liked being the one to bring Dr. Brennan into this mess in the first place. He really, really liked the blunt, outspoken woman and had never wished to see her come to harm. Even though he had known there was a certain amount of danger associated with this mission, he would have felt terrible if something had actually happened to her, especially after what his own daughter had tried to do to the woman. He would have liked to have helped in the search but he had no idea where he could be useful so he reluctantly went back to filling out his reports. After a moment, he sat back with a sigh. Who the hell was he kidding? He had seen that all was not well with Dr. Brennan and Agent Booth at the hospital when they had been treated and after hearing the reports on what had happened, he could understand why. He had definitely caused the anthropologist and her husband both emotional and physical harm simply by dragging them into this mess. He could only pray that it wasn't something they couldn't overcome because if he had ever seen two people that were meant to be together, it was them.
Brennan dragged herself off the toilet of the bathroom she had ducked into to give herself a moment to pull herself together. She had no idea how long she had been sitting there staring into space but it had been a while and it obviously was not working. She had no earthly idea what was going on with her. She had never felt this way before so she had no point of reference. She only knew that she didn't feel at all like herself and she didn't like it. But no matter how harshly she told herself to snap out of it, she just felt sad and tired, empty and almost drained to the point that nothing really mattered right now and that, alone, scared the crap out of her. Because things did matter to her, a lot of things mattered to her.
And Booth was at the top of that list. He mattered to her more than anything or anyone else in the world. And, despite what she had just seen in the gym, she knew that she mattered to him, that he loved her just as much as he loved her. She knew, in her heart, that they would work this out and they would be okay but it scared her to death that even her heart seemed to just echo eerily with tiny remnants of what she usually felt when she thought of her husband and their future together. What was wrong with her? She knew that she hadn't stopped loving her husband, it was impossible for her to still be breathing and that to have happened. She knew, without a doubt, that she would love him until the day she died but she had no idea what was going on inside her right now and didn't know how to explain it to him or anyone else. And, with the way things were going between them right now, she was almost afraid to even try to explain how she felt. What if she messed up the explanation? She knew she wasn't that good talking about feelings so what if she got it all jumbled and turned around and made things worse than they already were? She had no idea what to do and that was a new and somewhat unpleasant experience for her.
Washing her hands out of habit rather than necessity, she pulled open the bathroom door and stepped into the hallway, not really having a destination in mind. She had taken several steps before she realized that someone was speaking to her and turned to find herself face-to-face with Miriam Whitehouse, the ambassador's wife. This was not Brennan's first visit to this embassy. In fact, she had stayed here fairly often in the past when she had been assisting Nathaniel's team. It was a secure location where information and other things could be passed without fear of discovery.
She and Miriam had become acquainted and Brennan had found the fifty something woman to be a welcome change from the political wives she usually encountered. Miriam was tall, statuesque, very pretty still and very aware of whom she was married to and how she should act. She, however, rarely let that influence her actions and Brennan had really liked that about her. She failed to see the point in all the ass kissing in political circles and was fascinated to see Miriam work those same circles without her lips ever touching a derriere but she always came away with everyone there loving her. They had become friends and Brennan had asked her how she did that, her scientific sense of inquiry demanding some answers. Miriam had laughed heartily and told Brennan that her father was a bullshitter from way back and it was, apparently, genetic. Brennan had no idea what that meant but she hadn't pressed the issue.
Then Miriam had endeared herself to Brennan eternally. When she had been rescued from Perez's clutches, Brennan had been in bad shape, emotionally. Her physical health had been less than stellar after being starved for three days and the boys had been unable to get her to eat during the several days it took to get her to the city. She had been in good shape, though, compared to the girls. They were terrified, even around the boys. They followed Brennan around like little ghosts, screaming if she left their sights for even an instant. They knew little English and Brennan's knowledge of their language was limited but over the days of the journey to the city, they had developed a means of communication and made themselves understood to each other.
Arranging transport out of the country with the girls was a problem and would take a few days but they had all agreed it was the only thing they could do. No way could they leave those defenseless children behind to be found by Perez or, even worse, Rodrigo and there was no way those two would ever stop looking for witnesses to their sick fun. Reaching the city, they had come to the conclusion that the embassy was the safest, most secure place for the girls and Brennan until they could get them out of the country. Brennan had agreed but had been inwardly terrified that someone would try to take the girls from them and she wasn't about to let that happen. She had intended to enlist Miriam's assistance in hiding the girls but it had been completely unnecessary. Miriam had taken one look at the ragged group standing in front of her, especially those little girls and her heart had melted. Looking into Brennan's shattered eyes, she had hugged her tightly and simply said, "Tell me". So Brennan had given her what details she could stand to share and Miriam had made it her mission to get those children safely out of this country and help them disappear forever. Deciding it would look suspicions if they tried to hide them, she had treated them as honored guests. Brennan had never asked what cover story Miriam had given and Miriam had never said but it had, apparently, worked and Brennan would never forget the kindness the woman had shown to those two orphaned little girls and herself.
"Temperence," Miriam said with a radiant smile, coming toward Brennan with both hands extended, "I'm so sorry I wasn't available to greet you last night but we were out. I've been on the lookout for you all day. I hope you weren't going to leave without saying hello," she laughed, grasping Brennan's weakly extended hands and pulling her into a hug. Stepping back, she got a good look at Brennan's face and her laughter fled. She had only seen that shattered look on this woman's face once before and she truly hoped nothing like that had happened to her friend again. "What the hell has that bunch dragged you into now?" she demanded. "I swear to God, girl, I know you know how to use your words so I would think you would be able to say no to them every once in a while." Brennan was startled by the venom in Miriam's voice on her behalf then it struck her as extremely funny that anyone else would be upset on her behalf and she began to giggle. Miriam took one look at Brennan's face and cursed inwardly, knowing she had a near hysterical woman on her hands. Dr. Temperence Brennan did not giggle and Miriam knew she wouldn't want anyone to see her like this. "Come on, Sweetie. Let's go to my apartment and have some tea," she urged the still giggling Brennan, locking arms with her and leading her unresisting form away.
Booth took the stairs two at a time, his heart pounding so hard he wasn't sure his chest could contain it, the taste of real fear in his mouth. He had no idea what was going on with his wife but he knew instinctively that he needed to find her and find out. He had thought he knew everything about the amazing woman he had married but these last few weeks had proven that assumption false and he was actually ok with that. After all, they had the rest of their lives to continue to get to know each other but he didn't want to become familiar with the look he had seen in her eyes in the gym. He only wanted to find out what was wrong and make it and that look go away because it scared the crap out of him. What if he was responsible for putting that look in her eyes, for making her feel that way? Brennan was a fighter. She never, ever gave up. She didn't get defeated and to think he was somehow responsible for putting that look there broke his heart.
Had he truly been so caught up in his own anger that he hadn't seen what he was doing to his wife? Yes, he had to admit, it was possible. More than possible, his conscience snorted, it's pretty much a sure thing. Damn, sometimes Booth hated having the conscience of a good Catholic boy, it just loved to kick your ass when you were already down. But it was usually right and, as usual, he listened to it. Had his need to extract revenge from Alex almost driven him to break a promise to his wife? Yes, it had and she knew it, her walking in had been the only thing that had stopped it and she had known that or she wouldn't have basically told them that she no longer cared if they beat the crap out of each other. God, he couldn't believe he had almost done that, he thought running a hand over his face. He knew how hard it was to gain Brennan's trust and he had almost just thrown it away because he was angry at a man who had been doing what he thought was the right thing, who had been willing to give his life to protect Brennan. What the hell was wrong with him? Yes, he was still angry with Alex but that hardly registered at the moment. And this wasn't about Alex. It was about him almost breaking trust with his wife and the only thing that mattered right now was finding his wife and fixing things with her.
Reaching the bedroom that had been assigned to them, he eased the door open and slipped inside, fully expecting her to be there. She wasn't. His eyes ran over the room over and over, sure that she was there but he just hadn't spotted her yet. He strode over to the bathroom and shoved the door open just to make sure but it was empty. Knowing it was ridiculous to think she might be hiding from him in there, he even looked in the walk-in closet. Empty, just like he felt without her. Deflating, he sank into one of the plush armchairs in the room and dropped his head into his hands. Where was she? It wasn't like his Bones to hide from anything but, then again, he had never seen her defeated either. Had he done so much damage that she had actually run away from him? No! his heart cried and his head shot up. No, he couldn't believe that she would have just left without a word to him, not now, not even after their fight. She simply wouldn't do that, not to him, not to herself and not to their relationship. He believed that with all his heart.
The need to find her was growing by the second, he needed to see her, to hold her and have her tell him what was wrong. He needed to tell her he was sorry for almost breaking his promise not to hit Alex and reassure her that he would talk things out with the other man without physical violence. He needed to tell her that he loved her and was sorry if he had ever made her doubt that and that he truly understood why she had done what she did but he was still upset that she had put herself in danger and would be upset anytime that happened regardless of the circumstances. He needed to tell her that he was ready to let go of his anger that he wanted to take her home and get on with their lives together and that nothing she or anyone else ever did would make him want to not be with her. But most of all, he needed her to tell him what was wrong so he could fix it. And he would fix it, he would slay dragons for the love of his life so he had no doubts that he could take care of whatever was bothering her. He would simply wrap her up in his love and show her that nothing would ever, ever come between them. That decision made, he got to his feet and strode from the room to find his wife and slay those dragons.
Brennan listlessly followed Miriam into her and Herbert's luxuriously appointed apartment, her mind, maybe for the first time in her life, blank. She saw the concerned glances that Miriam kept giving her but she couldn't seem to bring herself to care and that actually perked her up a little. It might sound bad but it was a hell of a lot better than how she had been feeling for the last few days and she might just try to hang onto this feeling, or rather not feeling, for a while. She saw that Miriam had redecorated since she had been here last but couldn't really get excited about it so she didn't mention it. She seated herself on the sofa that Miriam indicated and looked at her friend blankly, waiting for instructions.
Miriam looked at Brennan and felt a shiver of real fear for her friend run down her spine. Miriam had been intrigued when she first met Brennan, both by the woman herself and the awe and respect she received from the average soldier. In Miriam's experience, this was a rare occurrence for a woman and unheard of for a woman who wasn't even in the military. So, she had started asking questions and she might have accidentally seen some of the reports on Brennan's activities that came across her husband's desk. At first, she had been disbelieving, skeptical that anyone not in the military would be trusted with missions like she was supposedly sent on and truly dubious that one woman could accomplish all the things that were credited to her. But visit after visit, Miriam had watched Brennan and talked to her and she had found herself developing a deep respect for this woman who put her life on the line for her country, not because it was her job but because she felt it was the right thing to do. She had found herself not only believing but reveling in each one of Brennan's accomplishments. She couldn't have been prouder of her if she had been her very own daughter.
But this was not the woman she had come to know over the last several years, the woman who did extremely dangerous things with courage and ingenuity. This wasn't even the shattered woman who had been captured and tortured by Perez. Most people, even big, strong soldiers would have been broken by that experience but not Temperence Brennan. Miriam had been extremely worried about her friend when Nathaniel had brought her to the embassy but Brennan had brushed aside Miriam's worry. Brennan's only concern had been to get the two little girls out of the country and Miriam had helped her for a multitude of reasons but mainly because it was the right thing to do. Miriam had watched Brennan closely, expecting her to break down at any time, but she never had and Miriam had seen an inner strength that awed her, a strength that might bend and tatter around the edges but she had never thought to see it break. But looking at the woman in front of her, she saw that she had been very, very wrong. Someone or something had finally broken that indomitable will that she so respected and treasured in her friend.
"Temperence," Miriam said softly, sitting beside Brennan as if she was made of glass and would shatter at a wrong move which wasn't far off from how Miriam viewed the current situation. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked, reaching out to pat Brennan's arm then withdrawing her hand, almost afraid to touch her when she felt the tension radiating from the anthropologist's body.
"Talk about what?" Her voice was as blank as her eyes and Miriam fought the urge to grab her friend, give her a good shake and demand that she snap out of it. That certainly wouldn't help things as they stood.
Miriam was very, very good at reading people. She had seen people come through the embassy running for their lives and she had seen genuine terror, shock and just about every other emotion you could name but she wasn't getting any of that from Brennan right now, she was getting absolutely nothing. She was praying it wasn't because Brennan had completely shut down but she was very afraid that was exactly what had happened and she had no idea what to do about it. Should she just confront her bluntly like she would have done in the past? No, she needed to figure out whom or what the hell had done this to her friend then she could figure out what to do about it.
"So, Herbert tells me there's a man sharing your room," Miriam began to probe for information in a breathy, gossipy voice that had always had Brennan rolling her eyes before. Brennan nodded and Miriam sighed. This wasn't going to be easy. "So, spill, who is he?" Miriam encouraged, truly curious.
"My husband," Brennan answered calmly.
"Your what?!" Brennan flinched and Miriam winced at her own raised voice. She was very familiar with Brennan's views on marriage and surprised didn't begin to cover what she was to hear that Brennan had succumbed. "You're married?" Miriam needed to hear it again, just to make sure she hadn't misunderstood. She was encouraged to see a faint smile touch Brennan's lips at her surprise.
"Yes, Miriam, I'm married," Brennan assured her, turning sideways on the sofa to face the other woman and Miriam copied the move, glad to see Brennan a little more animated.
"Well, don't stop there. I need details here," Miriam's enthusiasm reminded Brennan so much of Angela that she felt tears sting her eyes and her heart ached with how much she missed her the rest of her family. She pushed the feeling aside and concentrated on her friend's words. Miriam paused as she saw the glitter of tears in Brennan's eyes but she also saw a spark of feeling that was almost instantaneously extinguished from within and knew she had her work cut out for her. Well, at least she now knew that the feelings were there, Brennan was simply burying them and Miriam could only guess it was because she couldn't deal with everything she was feeling at the moment. Having known the anthropologist for years, that wouldn't surprise Miriam and she could definitely help with that. At least, she hoped she could. "Come on, Temperence, you've got to give me something here," Miriam whined and Brennan couldn't hold back her grin. "Who is he?" Miriam was thrilled with the grin but she also genuinely wanted the 411 on the man who could change Brennan's mind about marriage.
"It's Booth," Brennan said softly as if that was all there was to say and it kind of was. Miriam had always questioned Brennan about the special man in her life but there never seemed to be one, not one that she would talk about anyway. But she was always ready to talk about her partner and Miriam had gotten the impression that there was much more there than just being friends and partners. She was glad, for her friend's sake, that she had fallen in love with her best friend, someone who already knew her, good qualities and bad, and loved her as much as she obviously loved him. Brennan deserved someone to love her that much. And marriage with your best friend was the best of all worlds, Miriam thought, and she should know, she had been married to her best friend for almost 30 years now and they were happier than they had ever been.
"Can I get you something, Mrs. Whitehouse?" questioned a shy young woman, coming into the room. Miriam smiled at the girl.
"Maria, I've told you repeatedly that there is no need for formalities. Please call me Miriam, just like your mother does." Maria smiled and blushed but didn't answer. Miriam turned to Brennan consideringly. She really didn't think they needed tea, she thought this situation called for alcohol. "Wine or whiskey?" she queried with a raised brow and Brennan laughed. Miriam could drink her under the table, apparently another trait passed on genetically from her father.
"Wine," Brennan answered, going with the safer choice. Maria didn't wait for Miriam to instruct her, she hurried out of the room, obviously eager to please. "What happened to Esperenza?" Brennan asked quietly, knowing that Miriam's old housekeeper had been with her for years and they were great friends.
"She had a stroke and isn't doing all that well," Miriam responded sadly. "Maria is her daughter and I couldn't say no when Esperenza asked if she could take her place. She does a really good job, but I miss her mother." Brennan could understand that. She only had a select few that she considered true friends and losing any of them would leave a hole in her life. She smiled politely at the girl when she brought their wine and quickly left the room. Her mother would have sat down and chatted with them. Sighing, Miriam opened the bottle of wine and poured them both glasses. Sitting back and handing Brennan hers, she lightly tapped her glass against Brennan's. "Congratulations on your marriage," she offered warmly.
"Thank you." Brennan smiled and sipped her wine. Miriam sat back with an inner smile. It always amazed her that Brennan didn't do girl talk. She had never quite gotten up the nerve to ask her if she didn't know how or just didn't see the need. She was guessing it was a combination of the two but why didn't really matter. What mattered was that if you wanted to know something with the other woman, you had to ask.
"How long have you been married?" Brennan's brow furrowed as she silently counted.
"Two weeks tomorrow," she answered placidly, looking at Miriam oddly when she appeared to choke on her wine.
"What?" gasped Miriam. "You've not even been married two weeks and you're both here on a mission for the government?" Brennan blinked as if she didn't understand the question then nodded.
Miriam was aghast. What the hell was wrong with Hood and his people? She didn't care how long and well two people had known each other or if they were even already living together, marriage between those same two people changed things in some indefinable way and they needed an adjustment period. And that period sure as hell exceeded two weeks. Why couldn't they have allowed the couple more time together before intruding? What could have been so all fired important that it couldn't wait?
"It wasn't like we had a lot of choice," Brennan mused and Miriam was startled from her inner musings, wondering if the other woman had just read her mind. But no, Brennan wasn't even looking at her, she was staring into her wineglass as if it held the answers to the mysteries of the universe and she looked so sad that Miriam felt her heart break for her friend.
"Why didn't you have a choice?" she questioned softly.
"Rodrigo tried to blow up my lab." Brennan was no longer sad, she was utterly furious as she drained her glass and leaned forward to pour herself more wine. Miriam was confused.
"Juan Rodrigo tried to blow up your lab at the Jeffersonian?" The confusion in Miriam's voice had Brennan glancing at her and nodding. "Why? Was he trying to kill you?" Miriam knew all about Rodrigo and him trying to kill someone wouldn't surprise her at all. He was a very bad man. Rather he had been a very bad man, she reminded herself, doubting anyone anywhere really mourned his recent demise. Brennan snorted.
"Hardly. I wasn't even there. No, he wasn't trying to kill me. He was trying to force the Jeffersonian to sever their partnership with the FBI." Miriam winced at the guilt in her friend's voice. "He wanted me to help General Hood get rid of Perez so that he could assume leadership of the drug cartel and he thought Booth, as my partner, would try to talk me out of offering my assistance." She began to laugh and Miriam couldn't help but notice it had a slightly hysterical edge to it. She also noticed that Brennan might be doing her best to not feel anything but all kinds of emotions were boiling inside her, barely contained below the surface. Miriam was glad she hadn't shut down completely but the fact that it looked like her friend was about to blow with the force of Mt. Vesuvius worried her just a tad.
"Why is that funny?" Still laughing, Brennan turned toward her.
"Booth and I got married in Las Vegas two days before that son of a bitch tried to blow up my lab and hurt my family." Brennan's laughter stopped and her voice was so cold that Miriam shivered then she processed the words and was horrified. Brennan had changed her life in a way that she had always sworn she would never do, something that had to generate strong feelings and needed at least some time to adjust to. She had, no doubt, gone home two days later expecting to have that time and enjoy congratulations and good wishes from her family and had, instead, walked into fear and chaos. And Miriam knew well how loyal Brennan was toward people she cared about, she imagined she would be even more so with people she loved and her people being put at risk had to have been stressful. Reaching over, Miriam laid a hand on Brennan's arm silently offering comfort.
"Then what happened?" At this point Miriam was almost afraid to ask but Brennan seemed willing to talk about it and Miriam got the impression that she needed to talk about it with someone.
"Hood asked me to help trap Perez and I turned him down," she said indignantly, draining her glass again. "Rodrigo didn't like that so he came to my office to see me and told me if I didn't willingly offer my assistance, he would kill my family one by one. Then he would take me to Perez himself." Miriam drained her glass on this one, grabbed the bottle and poured refills for both of them.
"He actually came to your work to threaten you after he tried to blow the place up?" Miriam asked, amazed at the gall it would take to do that. "He didn't try to hurt you, did he?" Concern was evident in her voice and Brennan patted Miriam's arm reassuringly.
"He didn't get a chance. Nathaniel got there before he got that far and threw him out." Brennan looked at Miriam curiously as the older woman choked on the mouthful of wine she had just taken and started coughing.
"How long," cough, gasp, "had you been back," gasp, cough, "when Nathaniel," cough, "showed up?" Brennan helpfully thumped Miriam on the back until the coughing fit was over.
"Two days," Brennan sighed. Miriam closed her eyes. She had been married four days and Nathaniel had shown up? Oh, dear God, that didn't even bear thinking about. She knew how Nathaniel felt about Brennan and that Brennan was oblivious but she doubted that her brand, spanking new husband could have missed it and that couldn't have gone over well. At this point, she wasn't surprised that Brennan was emotionally volatile or even drained, she was just surprised she was still standing on her own two feet.
Brennan's head dropped against the back of the sofa and it suddenly occurred to her how good it felt to tell this story to someone completely outside everything that had happened. Someone who wouldn't judge her, someone who didn't have an agenda, even if that agenda was keeping her safe, someone to whom she didn't have to explain and justify every thought and action and someone who might be able to give her some insight in how to fix things with her husband because she had to determine how to make things right with Booth. She just had to because it was her fault things were so messed up in the first place and it was killing her for him to be that angry with her. It was even worse to feel the guilt over hurting him and knowing that he had every right to feel that way. Her heart ached at the agony and fear she had put him through and she gave up on locking away her feelings. She had never been able to do that with Booth and didn't really want to, she just wanted to understand what she was feeling and why she was feeling that way.
She truly understood his point of view and was willing to admit that she had acted rashly, but something she hadn't told Booth was that she had known, in her heart and in her gut, that he would never let anything happen to her. She had just known that if something went wrong with her plan, he would come for her and she had trusted in that, as irrational and illogical as that was. But how was she supposed to explain that to him now without it appearing that she was trying to flatter or placate him? Or without it looking like she was withholding things from him? She wasn't, she simply hadn't thought about it when they were fighting.
And how was she supposed to protect Alex from her husband's ire when he insisted on taunting Booth like that? Maybe he didn't deserve her protection, she thought sourly, if he was going to act like that. Yes, he did deserve her protection, she acknowledged with an inward sigh. He had risked his life to help her save the lives of people they both cared about but he had mostly done it because of her and she couldn't let him get hurt because of that. And she was afraid that Booth would really lose his temper and they both would wind up hurt because Alex would fight back and he could definitely defend himself. If it hadn't been for that she would have handed them the sparring gloves herself and wished them both luck so Booth could get his need for vengeance out of his system and Alex could allow himself to be punished like he thought he deserved. Even though both men had promised not to fight, those promises had been made under duress but she had had every intention of demanding they be kept but now she just didn't know what to do. Men, she was finding, were exhausting and could be a royal pain in the ass.
Yes, even Booth could be a pain in the ass but he was worth every second of aggravation simply because she loved him. And it wasn't like she was always little Miss Sunshine and never caused him any frustration but he made her happy and fulfilled her in a way that her hard core feminist side didn't even want to admit existed. In essence, he completed her and she knew he felt the same way about her, even when they were yelling at each other. She hated it when they were upset with each other. It made her stomach and heart hurt and she had to figure out a way to repair the damage she had caused but being a genius wasn't turning out to be of much aid in that endeavor and she refused to even consider the possibility that it couldn't be fixed. She loved him enough to die in his place because she had no desire to have a future without him in it but he already knew that from her actions and that, apparently, was part of the problem which made no sense whatsoever to her. She desperately needed the help of someone who knew about marriage and had no biases regarding her current predicament to figure out her course of action.
And it just so happened that such a person was sitting right beside her. Yes, Miriam was her friend but that didn't make her biased. Brennan had never known her to be anything less than honest and straightforward and she had been married for almost 3 decades so surely she would have some enlightening words of wisdom. Rolling her head, she eyed Miriam consideringly. Miriam sat placidly under her gaze, patiently waiting on Brennan to finish her musings and continue her story. Quickly making up her mind, Brennan sat up straight and turned more fully toward the older woman.
"I need some advice," she said quietly, "but I have to tell you the rest of the story first and I have to warn you that it gets a whole lot worse." Miriam's eyes widened as if she found that difficult to believe then, without a word, she set down her glass of wine, got up, went straight to the wet bar, poured two large glasses of scotch and returned to the sofa, handing one of the drinks to Brennan.
"Tell me," she said softly, reseating herself and turning toward Brennan. So Brennan did. She started with the time that she had spent as a captive of Perez for background. Yes, Miriam knew a little of this story but, at the time, Brennan had shared only the bare bones of events with her friend. Before she started, Brennan reassured Miriam they she could stop her at any time but the older woman never did so and Brennan gave her every brutal, gruesome detail. Miriam was pale and half of her drink was gone at the end of the story but she really held up like a trooper.
Miriam looked at Brennan and felt a level of respect for this woman but she wasn't sure she had ever felt for anyone else. She had to be one of the strongest, most indomitable people on the face of the earth to not only have survived such horrific events but to have been able to carry on and live her life, refusing to let those monsters take anything else away from her. She didn't especially enjoy hearing about the gruesome events that had taken place during those three days but she could tell that Brennan really, really needed to talk about this. And her friend had actually experienced all that horror so Miriam figured the least she could do was to listen when Brennan needed to talk about it. That's what friends were for. Reaching over, she took one of Brennan's hands in hers and held it tightly, not sure if she was offering or requesting comfort, but Brennan didn't object. She simply picked up the story from Nathaniel and the boys arriving in her office and continued through today, leaving out nothing.
When she came to the part about her fight with Booth, her heart rate sped up, her palms got all sweaty and she felt like she was going to throw up remembering the anger and pain that had been flowing in that room. It made her ashamed to know that she had hurt the person that she loved most in the whole world like she had. She honestly didn't know what she could have done differently but Booth was right, she should have talked to him about her plan. She simply told Miriam that she and Booth had had a disagreement, unable to bring herself to share the intimate details even with a good friend. This was between them and them alone.
When Brennan stopped talking, Miriam just stared at her in wide-eyed shock for several minutes then she turned her glass of scotch up only to find it empty. Reflexively reaching for Brennan's glass, she found it also empty. Getting up, she went to the bar, snatched up the bottle of alcohol, came back to the couch, sat down and poured them both about three more fingers of Scotch. Looking at the anthropologist, Miriam was no longer surprised that Brennan wasn't quite her usual self at the moment. She was only surprised that she wasn't a raving lunatic. How anyone could survive event after ghastly event and maintain not only their grip on sanity but there will to go on was beyond her. Miriam knew that she could never have done it. If only a small portion of those awful things had happened to her, she had no doubt that she would be permanently locked away in a rubber room somewhere. Being an ambassador's wife, she had thought she had an appropriate response to every situation imaginable but she now found herself floundering. What in the world were you supposed to say about what she had just heard? I'm sorry for your trouble didn't seem quite adequate but, then again, I'm glad the bastards are dead might be a little overkill. So she went with honesty because she knew that Brennan respected that.
"Temperance, I have no idea what the appropriate response to what you just told me is. But I'm very, very happy that you came through it without more serious injuries," she said quietly once again taking Brennan's hand and squeezing it gently.
Brennan returned the hand squeeze and she wanted to thank Miriam for the kind words but she just couldn't do it because, to her way of thinking, the injuries didn't get more serious than the emotional ones that she and Booth had inflicted on each other. She had always known that words held the power to cause pain and she didn't ever, ever want to have another fight like that with her husband. Oh, she knew that they would have many, many fights in the future but she hoped they could learn to do it more constructively instead of slicing each other to ribbons with words. But, she would have to worry about that later. Right now, she had to figure out how to fix things so there would be a future to worry about.
"Booth is really mad at me, Miriam," she said bluntly, her eyes begging the older woman for help as she settled against the back of the sofa in a languid slouch. Thanks to a combination of the amount of alcohol she had just consumed and her lack of adequate rest or decent meals over the past few days, she was starting to feel much mellower and very, very tired.
"So you're asking me for relationship advice?" Miriam wanted to be sure she wasn't misunderstanding the request. Brennan simply nodded. Generally, Miriam was very reluctant to give any type of relationship advice because she had found that it had a way of coming back to bite you in the ass. But she could see that her friend was struggling and she couldn't refuse to help. What she didn't have any problem at all with doing was guiding an individual to their own realizations and conclusions about the status of a relationship. She would definitely give that a try but if it didn't work, she would then offer the best advice she could based on the years of her own marriage. "Why do you think Booth is angry with you, Temperance?" Miriam could clearly see the misery of Brennan's face as she considered the question and her heart went out to the younger woman.
"I know why he's angry, Miriam. I need you to tell me how to fix it." Miriam sighed at the hint of impatience in Brennan's voice. She should have known it wouldn't be as easy as a couple of questions turning her emotionally challenged friend into a relationship expert. Okay then, time to hand out the advice and hope she didn't come to regret it.
"Temperance, it's impossible for me to tell you what actions to take to placate your husband because I really don't know enough about him to even be able to guess," Miriam held up a hand imperiously as Brennan sighed in disappointment and opened her mouth. Looking closely at the younger woman, Miriam almost laughed when she realized that Brennan was drunk. Brennan had asked for her advice so now she was going to listen to it before she either fell asleep or passed out. Miriam knew either was possible in her current state and it didn't look like it would be long in coming but she knew, from experience, that Brennan would remember this conversation so she forged ahead. "And, to be honest, I really don't think simply placating him is an ideal way to begin your marriage."
"I don't know what that means," Brennan sighed morosely and this time Miriam did laugh at the often repeated phrase.
"Sweetie," she said softly, giving the disgruntled looking anthropologist an apologetic smile, "you and your Booth have gone through more in two short weeks than most couples face in a lifetime so I'm not at all surprised that you have issues." Miriam paused and looked at Brennan a little oddly when she giggled a couple of times then broke into full throated laughter.
Brennan had no idea why she was laughing, that last comment had just struck her as hilarious. Issues, she had issues. She guessed that was as good of a thing to call a rip roaring fight with her husband as anything. She tried to stop laughing but, in her inebriated state, she couldn't seem to find the off button.
"Temperance," Miriam called sharply. Seeing that her friend was completely exhausted both emotionally and physically, she knew that she needed to finish dispensing advice and send the other woman off to sleep at least 24 hours. Miriam was certain that when Brennan was physically well rested, things would look brighter and she would be much more able to handle whatever was going on between her and her husband. Brennan's laughter dried up at the sharp note in Miriam's voice and she sat up and paid attention. "Sweetie, all I can really tell you is that keeping a marriage intact isn't always about who's right and who's wrong." Seeing the puzzled look on Brennan's face, she hurried on. "It's about caring enough about the other person to sometimes put their needs above your own. It's about being such good friends that you can and do talk about anything and everything and work out things as they come up. It's about respecting the other person enough to acknowledge that they have a right to their opinion and not trying to sway them to your way of looking at things. But mostly, Temperance, marriage is about compromise. You're the only person who can decide what's too important to you to compromise on but if only one person in the relationship is doing all the giving, then that relationship is pretty much doomed to failure."
"So I should let Booth win this one?" Miriam was a little startled at the interpretation Brennan had put on her words.
"Not necessarily. I guess I'm trying to say you should step back and try to see things from his point of view then just talk to him, Temperence. Tell him how you feel," Miriam urged.
"I'm not sure that's such a good idea, Miriam. I don't want us to end up finding again and I don't even know how I feel so how can I discuss my feelings with Booth?" A huge yawn caught Brennan by surprise.
"How long has it been since you've had a full night's uninterrupted sleep?" Miriam asked. Brennan shrugged. She honestly couldn't remember the last time she had slept more than four hours without interruption.
"I don't remember," she admitted sheepishly. Miriam put an arm around her shoulders and gave her a bracing hug.
"Okay, then here's what we're going to do," she ordered decisively. "You are going to finish your drink and then you are going to bed and you are going to rest up. I'll have meals sent up but you are not to leave that room for at least 24 hours." Miriam held up her hand for silence when she saw the militant set of Brennan's mouth. "Don't make me post a guard on your door." Miriam had no idea if she would actually have the guts to follow through with her threat but, luckily, she didn't have to find out because Brennan didn't argue.
"Fine, I'll get some sleep." Miriam almost laughed at the little girl pout that Brennan threw her away. She had almost forgotten how much the other woman liked to be in control and found herself suddenly hoping that this new husband of Brennan's had a core of steel or she would wind up walking all over him. But, she was only trying to help and she doubted that Brennan would rest well while being resentful of the fact that she was being forced to rest at all.
"Temperance," Miriam cajoled, "you are clearly physically and emotionally exhausted and I'm guessing that your husband is pretty much the same. You both need some rest before you try to tackle something that could impact the rest of your lives together." Brennan blinked at the other woman owlishly. She had to admit that she was pretty darn tired and getting sleepier by the second so maybe Miriam had a point.
"Okay, I really will get some rest," she promised softly.
"Good," Miriam only had a couple more things to say then she needed to hustle her guest off to bed before Brennan fell asleep where she sat which was going to be soon judging by the way her eyelids were drooping. Taking Brennan's hand, once again, Miriam finished the advice portion of the evening. "Temperence, it's obvious that you love your husband very much and I can only assume that he is just as much in love with you because I don't think you would have married him otherwise. Just always remember that maintaining a good relationship takes a lot of work from both parties and you have to communicate with each other and you'll be fine."
Brennan studied Miriam speculatively then nodded her understanding. Everything the other woman had said sounded perfectly logical to her but she would have to reason it out later because her head was getting a little fuzzy and she was having difficulty maintaining her train of thought. For some reason, Miriam being right about her needing to get some rest made her very, very happy. With a giggle, she got to her feet.
"Whoa," she whispered as the room began to spin around her. Dropping back onto the sofa, she tilted her head back and watched the ceiling go round and round. Miriam suppressed her laughter at Brennan's obvious enjoyment of what ever had caught her attention, got up from the sofa and went to the phone. She could easily call one of the guards to have Brennan taken back to her room but she had no intention of doing that. Picking up the phone, she decided it was about time she made the acquaintance of FBI Special Agent Seeley Booth.