AMERICA POV

"You dont have you go do you." I whined at Maxon. I really did'nt want him to go the rebel attacks had increased from none to how-many-rebel-attacks-have-we-had-today-oh-never-mind-I-lost-track-7-attacks-ago. Maxon just rolls his eyes at me he's gotten good at that It used to be he had a mini face seizure.

"You know I do plus you can use all of this extra alone time to actually start on the rsvp cards to our engadgement Ball." He teases giving me a peck on the nose. "Now I will see you in two weeks, and no you cannot come you have to stay here because if you did'nt who knows what kind of hoodlums would be ravaging this palace."

"No one says hoodlums anymore." I tease, and his face scrunches up he hates it when I say things like that.

"So are you saying I'm a no one." He says teasing me back and I try to mirror his Schreave scrunched up face scrunch. Although It just makes him laugh. "Because I remember not just mere minutes ago I was prince of Illea but I could be wrong. You never know when your just a case of simple mistaken Identity and your whole life has just been a giant lie. I could really be a eight that was just switched at birth and the real Prince Maxon is some crazy hoodlum thats going to ravage the palace while I'm away trying to get his home back."

"You. Are. Ridiculous." I snort laughing into his shoulder.

"I think you mean ridiculously royal."

"No I think we all mean you are the most ridiculous royal."

"I think we mean that I need to leave in five minutes." He interupts bringing his eyes back up from the small silver watch around his wrist to look at me.

"Goodbye America." He brings his soft fingers around my jawline bringing my face towards his with a brisk kiss. He leaves me one the bed with a few pases and a quick turn hes out the door and down the hallway.

"Goodbye Maxon." I whisper even though he's long gone and couldnt hear me even if he wanted to.

Mom is standing their hands intertwined with dads. But their young like in the pictures I see sticking out of boxes and photobooks. My heart skips several beats when May comes into view, then Kenna, James, and a small toddler. Astra. Kota stands in the back out of the way in the shadows stepping foreward last. I hear alarms much like the ones in the palace. They dont move no matter how much I shout at them to get somewhere safe. Mom just shakes her head no at me while Dad purses his lips and looks at his feet. Defeated. My ears fill with gun shots I see Dads blood spray first. Then I hear one word cry from my lips Daddy...

I jolt up out of bed. Breathless and shaking hard. The clock reads four twenty three with an led lit up face plate the seconds slowly pass. I cant bear it anymore throwing the covers off myself and walk to the bathroom.

The mirror is huge with gold trim framing it. My reflection is not someone I reckognize. Hollow cheeks letting out shakey breath. Skin pale against my bright hair. My eyes, they arnt mine they're darker. I look hollow. My shaking frame does'nt help anything if anything it makes it worse. Nothings changed since early december I still don't know how to be me. I don't know if I ever will.

I dont think I can play pretend anymore.

DONT EAT ME i know its been like ever... since i updated i know this is short but you know what I like it or maybe thats just the Lizzy Grant radio on pandora speaking I need to write to like disney what ever sorry for the lateness Shit keeps on going down at my house not fun but I'll try to update soon as I can

EruditeAbnegationMockinjay- no you are awesome! natalie you give the best reviews they always make me smile

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