CHAPTER 38

Aaron put his pint down on the table; he was on his own, neither Jackson nor Dora had arrived yet although Jackson had text him, the hospital was running late. So late he had had time to have a quick shower after work although he was surprised there was no sign of Dora yet. There were only a few other people in the bar; Betty and Pearl were gossiping with Diane at the far end of the bar while Alex and Andy stood midway along, staring silently into their pints. Aaron had nodded to them as he lifted his pint from the bar but had gone to the alcove table furthest from the bar, Dora's favourite table.

He sat with his phone in his hand, idly playing a game while he waited, trying to distract his thoughts from wandering, from wondering what Dora wanted. Most of their meetings had been singly, and they had met most days, even weekends, if only for a short while.

His phone pinged; he saved his score then switched to read the text message, Jackson was finally finished at the hospital. He allowed himself a small smile; no more awkward casts.

The door swung open; automatically the eyes of everyone in the pub turned to see the new arrival.

"Y'alright love?" Chas peered around the corner of the alcove, her sharp voice loud in the quiet bar. "What're you doing here all on your own? Jackson not back yet?"

"Yes. Waiting. No," answered Aaron.

"Eh?" said Chas, puzzled.

"Yes, I'm alright. I'm waiting for Jackson and Dora and no, Jackson isn't back yet," he said, a touch of impatience in his tone.

"Oh. Right," said Chas awkwardly. "So! Are you wanting a top up," she nodded to the half drunk pint. "How are you getting on with Dora? Is she helping, do you feel better?"

"No, you're alright, thanks," he said offhandedly, "I'll wait for Dora and Jackson."

Even as he spoke the door opened again; although his view was blocked it was only a second before Dora came into view behind his mother.

"Miss Dingle," she said politely, sliding into the seat next to Aaron, patting his leg companionably and offering her cheek for his brief kiss of welcome.

Chas opened her mouth in amazement, intending to say something, then silently shut it again.

"Your usual?" Aaron asked Dora, smoothly standing.

"Yes please," beamed Dora. "Have you heard from Jackson?"

"He's on his way," confirmed Aaron, moving to pass Chas. She stood back, allowing him to pass but followed him to the bar, talking up a position a little to one side of him.

"I said to myself..." The door crashed open again and the voice became louder, "I said Hazel, you need to find a doctor, this waiting around is getting ridiculous!" Hazel strode into the bar and looked around, spying Chas, she made her way purposefully over. Behind her, Cain followed; Chas wasn't surprised at his expression, shell shock; in full flow, Hazel was a force of nature to be reckoned with.

"Over two hours we were waiting," she continued, coming to a halt beside Chas. "Two hours to remove two casts and have two x-rays! How long did that take? Fifteen minutes? Twenty? I'll tell you how long that took," she glared around at her audience; Chas, Cain, Dora, Aaron and standing quietly behind her, Jackson. "Ten minutes. Ten minutes!" she repeated. "That's all it took..."

Jackson moved to stand beside Aaron, he was used to his mother's indignant outbursts, he knew the storm would subside after a gin. He pressed the side of his body against Aaron, smiling almost shyly when Aaron looked at him, returning his subtle touch.

"No casts," said Aaron quietly, nodding down at Jackson's left side.

"No casts," agreed Jackson, nodding slightly.

"How does it feel?" asked Aaron.

"A bit sore and achy, to be honest," confessed Jackson.

"Go and sit beside Dora," said Aaron, "I'll bring the drinks over."

Hazel was still holding forth to anyone who would listen but Diane peeled away from the little group to get their drinks.

"She's exaggerating," Jackson was explaining to Dora when Aaron arrived minutes later with their drinks. "It took more than ten minutes to get both casts off and the x-rays taken," he shook his head fondly as he watched his mother, still in high dudgeon and airing her annoyance to anyone still listening. "Although it did seem very quick after all the time we had been waiting," he conceded.

"But they're gone now," said Dora comfortably, "that physical inconvenience is done with."

"I've to see the consultant for a follow up in a few weeks," said Jackson, "and they want me to see a physio next week. But at least the casts have gone."

"And you'll be glad about that," prompted Dora; it wasn't quite a question.

"Very!" laughed Jackson, catching Aaron's smile on the other side of the table.

"Six weeks ago, this day seemed an impossibly long time away, didn't it?" mused Dora. "But here we are, celebrating your 'cast-less-ness'. You've got through it though; you coped with it; that part at least, is over." She spoke quietly; she knew Aaron and Jackson were only half listening to her. Well they might listen more closely in a minute or two when they heard what she had to say. She sipped her drink, watching the unspoken play between them.

"To describe something as being over does imply a certain finality..." continued Dora idly, "...a finality that in reality, might not be there."

"Sorry Dora," said Jackson, bringing his attention back to the older woman, "what were you saying?"

"Oh nothing really, Jackson," laughed Dora, "just being a silly old woman!"

"When are you ever that," scoffed Jackson.

"Yes. Well. That's as maybe," said Dora, hiding her delight. "Now boys, there is something we need to talk about; something I need to tell you."

Suddenly they were all attention, their eyes on her rather than each other.

"Dora?" prompted Aaron, his voice worried now.

"It seems appropriate, an opportune moment," began Dora. She could see the concern etched in their eyes. "We've talked a lot these last few weeks, you've put up with listening to my ramblings without complaint, but I think it is time to draw a line, at least a little one."

"What d'you mean? You're not making sense!" Jackson struggled to keep the panic from his voice. He could feel a sense of dread flooding his body; he knew, instantly he knew what Dora was about to say. "No, Dora," he whispered, "no, please."

"What?" said Aaron, "what're you talking about? What d'you mean?"

"She's leaving," said Jackson quietly, "it's over."

"Jackson!" scolded Dora. "You make it sound so final. It is true I think it is a good time for me to leave Emmerdale; things are changing again for you, your arm and leg are healing well, you will be busy regaining your strength, going back to work and you are coping. And that is what you have been working towards, both of you; not forgetting – that isn't possible – but coping."

"But Dora," began Aaron, "what if we can't...cope I mean?"

"Then I am only a telephone call, a text message, an email away." She smiled kindly at them. "I've wiped tears and snot from both your faces these last few weeks, held you when you couldn't stop crying, I'm not going to abandon you now. But tell me, honestly, are you the same boys as you were six, eight weeks ago? Do you think the same? Feel the same?"

Aaron said nothing; he caught his lower lip with is teeth as he pondered Dora's question, somehow it seemed longer than six weeks ago, so much had changed, so much of that had been down to Dora. He flicked his eyes towards Jackson.

Jackson caught his look, his mouth curled in the slightest of smiles, suddenly thoughts of the night before came into his mind; she was right, they weren't the same people.

"So," said Dora. They hadn't spoken but she had seen every thought, every emotion, cross their faces as clear to read as an open book. If you knew the language. "Have you finished panicking now?" she continued. "Just to be clear, I am not abandoning you, I will never abandon you as long as you need me, we are merely changing the dynamics of our communications. You are away at the weekend, which is fortuitous timing and I do have a university post to get back to." She smiled indulgently at them. "Now. What about some tea?"

...

It was dark by the time they left the Woolie and wandered back up the street towards Smithy. They walked slowly, relishing the peace of the resting village, the comforting darkness.

"I wasn't expecting that," mused Aaron, "Dora leaving."

"No," agreed Jackson, "but I suppose we should have expected it, she couldn't stay here forever, however good it's been." He was silent for a step or two. "And she was right, things have changed, are better." He stopped; his hand sought Aaron's, pulling him to a halt beside him. "I'm glad...how I felt before...the thoughts that had started coming into my head since, well, you know...they were just so horrible. I couldn't have gone on like that."

For a moment both of them were silent, doing nothing but gaze at each other, the only light coming from the sporadic lights illuminating the village street.

"Thank God for Dora," whispered Aaron; he could see Jackson's face, see the strange shadows from the half light playing across it. His eyes, always dark, were deep, bottomless pits glinting in the darkness; a chill passed through Aaron, a sudden, sharp, vision of what might have been, a ghost walking over his grave. "Thank Finn for Dora," he amended. "I'm glad we're going away this weekend."

"Me too," agreed Jackson. "And I'm glad Simon and Robbie can get away too."

"Yeah," said Aaron. "C'mon," he spoke briskly, mentally shaking himself. "Let's get indoors and go to bed."

"Sounds like a plan," grinned Jackson.