Hands of Lucifer
EDWARD POV
"All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope."-Winston Churchill
All things Twilight related belong to Stephanie Meyer
I drove the Mercedes smoothly and steadily, letting my hands caress the steering wheel to calm my nerves. I tried to go as slow as possible, watching my surroundings pass me by. The twisted and gnarled wrought iron gates of our house were up ahead. Large C's were warped into the metal on each side, loudly announcing who lived beyond the entrances, just in case you didn't know.
The guard, who basically lived in the same spot, never moving or leaving, noticed me and the gates slowly opened. I purposefully let my foot idle over the pedal before pushing the car forward. I crept up towards the house, which stood grand and lofty, illuminated by lights on all sides. Men with guns silently crept around the grounds, patrolling and keeping my most precious items safe.
I got out of the car and didn't even bother turning it off. Someone would put it in the garage later. I was more concerned with getting inside.
With my clothes grimy and my shoes still bloody, I climbed the stairs of our elaborate stone porch and the door opened without question. Gioni was there to take my jacket, silently nodding his head in greeting.
"Where is she?" I demanded an answer with my harsh tone.
"Outside, sir."
I bit my lip as I walked through the house, letting my footsteps echo off of the walls. My heart thundered in my chest when I neared the back porch. The large, glass French doors were open, letting the warm breeze flow. It blew the drapes in a rhythmic motion that was oddly soothing.
Bella was in one of the comfortable outdoor couches, the fire pit in front of her raging with the flames lapping at the night air. Both dogs had accompanied her. Francis was curled up to her side, making soft puttering noises as he slept. Bosco's head was nestled on her lap, providing her with more comfort than I probably could at this point. A bottle of white wine was on the table near the couch, more than halfway emptied. She held a large glass in her hand.
She didn't turn when my shoes clicked on the pavement, but I knew she had heard me. The dogs both raised their heads, though they didn't move.
"Bella?" I called to her softly. She didn't answer. "Bella, please…"
Her face was stained with tears that had since dried, but it still hurt me like hell to see the red of her cheeks and the purple under her eyes. Seeing my wife cry was one of the worst pains in the world. Bella in any kind of distress was almost too much for me to bear. I hated it, and even more, I hated that this time, I had been the cause of it.
"May I sit?" I asked, my voice tentative like I was walking on glass.
"If you want." She took a sip of her wine and sniffled.
I kept to the far side of the couch, pushing myself away from Bella at all costs. I wanted to comfort her, wrap her in my arms and tell her that I was sorry, because I was. She was the only person in the world I could apologize to without feeling shamed or embarrassed, and even now, the words wouldn't come. An apology didn't seem to be good enough to right the wrong I had made her witness.
Bella didn't raise her head to look at me, but all I wanted to see was her eyes. They would tell me how much pain she was in. She ran her hand through Bosco's thick fur behind his ears. He purred at the contact, and I detested him for being so close to her and enjoying her touch.
"Bella, I never meant for you to see me like that," I began. "It was never my intention to scare you. I just wasn't thinking."
She nodded. "I understand."
That was all I got. Her tone wasn't clipped or angry. I expected more, something, anything. I needed to be yelled at and scolded like the criminal I was. Yet, she gave me nothing. It made me feel even worse.
"I told you I was a monster," I whispered. "On our first date, I warned you. I've hid it well these past years, but I slipped up tonight. I didn't want you to see that side of me."
"This isn't the first time I've seen you kill a man, Edward." She sniffled again.
"But it was always in protection. I never offensively killed anyone in front of you, and never as violently as I did just now. I am sorry for exposing you to that. I'm a monster, a sinner, " I repeated.
She didn't deny it, though I didn't expect her to.
We sat for a long while in silence, watching the cool winds whip around the trees of our expansive backyard. At some times, I think we lived on a military base with the high fences and guards and security measures. None of it made for peace and quiet, like we needed tonight.
"If you're a monster then what does that say about me?" she asked quietly. "I married you. I had children with you. Does that make me a sinner too?"
"No, Bella." I inched closer to her, but still kept some distance between us. "Don't ever say that. You're the only truly innocent part of my life. You and the kids, of course. I carry the weight of all my bad deeds. Please, don't think that way. I should have never dragged you into any of this."
She gargled out a laugh. "It's a little too late for that, Edward."
I pulled my hands through my hair, disturbing it further than it already was. I wanted to look at her before, but now I couldn't. I didn't feel worthy. I hated to feel like this because it wasn't in my nature to be so self-deprecating or regretful.
"I understand if you hate me." I shook my head in disgust.
"I don't hate you, Edward. I don't think I ever could and that's what scares me." I felt her body come closer. Feeling compressed, Bosco jumped down from the couch leaving us with little room between us.
"Scares you?"
"You don't understand how immensely you have me wrapped around your finger, and it terrifies me sometimes. I should be running for the hills, calling the police, turning you in but… that all seems wrong to me. I watched you kill a man, and I'm sitting here drinking wine like it's some garden party. What does that say about me?"
"Why are you so fucking pure?" I jumped up, suddenly angry. My voice raised several decibels. "You are the good one! Stop this nonsense."
She didn't shy away from my rage. "I know what you do is wrong, but I can't walk away. I've convinced myself that it doesn't matter."
"I've made you this way." I wanted to get on my knees and beg her for forgiveness. This wasn't right. "How could you love me after what you just saw me do?" I questioned.
"It's a sickness, Edward, and I wouldn't want it healed even I could. It's always been that way." Tears feel from her eyes and I sat down, wiping them away from my fingers. "I'm scared for myself. Charlie was right. I've changed so much and I don't think I would ever want to go back because that means I couldn't be with you. I know that sounds pathetic, but I don't care."
"No, Bella. No. You didn't have to change for me." I was trying to find a way to take this burden. "I'm so sorry."
"I even told you to kill Vienna and I felt nothing over it. I'm so screwed up in the head."
"That had nothing to do with you. You were protecting your family. It was the right thing to do."
"Really? Because it makes me a little sick thinking that I could do something so terrible."
"I gave the order Bella. It wasn't your fault."
This was when I realized that this wasn't about tonight's free kill. It was a pebble in Bella's mind compared to the boulder that rested inside her. Bella was cracking before my eyes, years of pent up emotions spilling forth in a torrent of confusion. She hated me. She loved me. She wanted and needed me, but didn't know how to accept me. She was wholesome and I was not. Our kind shouldn't mix, and yet they did. It was against nature, but I fought it for all those years, convincing myself that it would be fine.
I couldn't take any more of it and understood that I was useless at comforting her through this, so I called the only person in the world I knew who could.
"Edward, what happened?" Esme bounced up the stairs to greet me at the door. "Is everything alright? Is it the babies?"
"No, it's Bella." I bowed my head. "I don't know what to do. She saw something tonight that she shouldn't have and I think I've scared her into some kind of shock."
She pulled off her coat and handed it to me. "Where is she?"
"Out back." I pointed.
Esme took off, her feet making soft noises in the foyer.
I left them alone for half an hour. I didn't know how they felt about each other on a superficial level, but I knew that my mother loved Bella like her own daughter. She and Carlisle had been back for three months now, and we hadn't exchanged more than ten words. It was breaking our family apart, and as much as I hated my father, I realized that I needed to make a change. Maybe I could start with Esme.
After calming myself down, I went out to them.
Bella was wrapped in a blanket, her face still covered in tears. Esme was so loving with her touches, caring for her wounded child.
I sat as far away as I could, in a chair across the porch behind them, but still in hearing distance. I don't think they noticed me.
"You were so young and it's hard, I understand that." Esme patted Bella's back. "It's difficult to wrap your mind around things like this at eighteen. Even now, you're too young to be dealing with the things that you do."
"I try to stay strong. You did. Rose and Alice do. But watching him… like that, but still loving him…"
"Edward was wrong, not you. You should never have seen him in that way."
"I'm a cop's daughter and I sleep next to a man who kills people." She wiped her face. "And I'm okay with it. That's what confuses me."
"Would you ever leave him?" Esme asked seriously.
Bella raised her head, offended. "What? Of course not!"
I sent up a soundless prayer of thanks to whatever God was keeping her here.
"You're loyal and you care for him beyond belief. That's why you're still here, Bella. Our men do what they do out of tradition, honor, pride. But we stay because of love. It makes us powerless and powerful at the same time. I don't know how to explain it."
"You don't have to. I understand completely."
"That's why I never left Carlisle. I was so mad at him after I found out Edward was alive, unbelievably mad. I didn't speak to him for weeks, but I realized that leaving would do so much damage to both of us. We went away because we had to in order to save our marriage. We traveled and got to know each other again. It had been too long."
"I don't blame you for leaving when you did."
"Even after all these years, I love him to a point that I shouldn't. It's not healthy. That's what I think you're starting to understand."
"I must sound like such a wimp."
"No, Bella. I was surprised you even stayed around after you learned about us. And when you did, I knew you were the one for him."
Bella nodded, seemingly better.
Esme continued, "The love was already there, you just needed the acceptance. We convince ourselves that our husbands do good deeds when they really don't. Stop trying to trick your brain because I can tell you right now it will never work. Edward is a bad man who does bad things, but at home, with you and those babies, he's the sweetest, most caring person alive."
"You're right," Bella choked out.
"I know you've seen The Godfather, everyone has." My mother chuckled, "People think that we live our lives like that movie, but we really don't. It's not a movie. This is very, very real and I'm sorry you are hurting because of it."
"I guess I just wasn't prepared."
"Did he tell you exactly why he killed that man? Sometimes if helps if you understand the reason." Esme explained.
"Something about a hit list. Edward's…ambitious, as you know. He's getting rid of everyone who poses any kind of threat."
"He gets that from Nicola."
"He's being so irresponsible. How long does he think he can keep this up before it's his ass on the curb? What does he expect me to do then?"
"Tonight was his fault. He should have never mixed his two sides. But this wasn't the first time and it won't be the last. There will be unspeakable acts of violence that your husband will commit, and you have to know that he would never be that way with you. It's what's required of him."
"He calls himself a monster."
"They all do. But you need to support him and care for him, because he won't get it anywhere else. Edward didn't choose you so much as he needed you in his life. You calm him and make him a better person. You might not be able to see it, but I can. All my boys are stronger because of the women in their lives. It's what we do."
Bella let out a long exhale, still not noticing me behind them. She was processing all this information without a pained expression ever crossing her face.
"And… I'm sorry." Esme dropped her head.
"You're sorry?"
"For what I said to you at Nicola's funeral. I'm so incredibly sorry. I know you hate me for it but... in the heat of the moment, I was overwhelmed and shocked. You never deserved to lose that baby."
"I forgave you a long time ago, but it still hurt."
"I know it did and you don't know how many sleepless nights I endured, trying to think of a way to apologize. After being back here for all these months, I realize that I'm not half the woman you are."
"Esme, you're being ridiculous."
"No, Bella, I'm not. I thought I was a good mother, and I pride myself on having raised my boys well, but everything I've done, you've done it ten times better. This life was thrust upon you so quickly. I was born into it; it's different. You had to adapt and lead this family in my absences. Carlisle and I are so proud of you and Edward. Even if you two hate us."
"We don't hate you."
"It's okay." Esme patted Bella's knee. "I would hate me too. I abandoned my family when they needed me most, but you kept them going."
"No," she protested.
"You know what I did when we got back? I asked Alec if he wanted to live with us again." Esme's lips went up slightly into a smile. "I could tell he would say no, but I had to ask. We might have adopted him, but he thinks of you and Edward as his parents. You raised him, not me. You're an amazing mother, and an amazing wife. Our family owes so much to you because you keep Edward going."
Bella didn't reply. She knew it was true. I knew it was true. All of Chicago knew it was true. I would be nothing without that woman.
"I used to be the queen of this city, but not anymore. I'm okay with that because I've passed the crown to a wonderful person." Esme hugged Bella so tightly, I thought her eyes might pop out. Bella immediately clung to my mother, holding her close.
"Thank you," she whispered.
It was so quiet outside, that the cry of a baby from upstairs reached our ears without a problem. My first reaction was to jump up and attend to my children, but I didn't want to move from my spot. I didn't want to leave Bella.
Bella pulled away. "You still haven't seen them yet, have you?"
Esme shook her head, embarrassed. "Edward doesn't want us to. I understand."
"Would you like to now?"
I think Esme might have exploded if she could. "Really?"
Bella nodded, her eyes finding mine. "Yeah, I'm sure they would want to finally meet you."
Esme gasped in short breaths before getting up and turning to walk back into the house. When she spotted me, her face fell. She whispered to me. "Edward get your shit together. It's causing your wife pain and I won't have it. Do you understand me?"
I chuckled lowly. Even after all these months away, she was still my mother. "Yes, ma'am."
She hugged me fiercely. "We'll talk later, but thank you for calling me. It means the world."
"Go up and see the babies." I rubbed her back.
Esme nearly shot out of sight.
It took me a minute or so to get up the courage to move closer to Bella. I hesitantly sat next to her. She smiled and melted into my arms, her head resting against my chest. I nearly drowned my nose in her hair, trying to savor our closeness.
"You're not a monster," she said adamantly. "You're my husband."
"I'm both and I'm sorry for it." I kissed her forehead. "But I love you. Beyond all the blood and anger that I have for the world, I love you. Don't doubt it."
"I never have." She cuddled closer to me.
We spent the night on the porch, wrapped in the blanket while the fire kept going strong.
A week later, I was sitting in a dark corner of a Thai restaurant, trying not to gag on the atrocious and offensive smells coming from the table next to me. I hated Thai food, but this was one of Carlisle's favorite places, so I conceded. It was as much of an olive branch as he was getting at the moment.
I took large gulps of my water, swishing it around in my mouth and tapped my fingers on the table. I stupidly arrived half an hour early and didn't have anything else to do, but wait. It was torture because it left me with time to go over my main speeches that I had planned for this meeting.
With the reconciliation of Esme and Bella, I felt it was time to have a manly talk with my father. It had been too long, and if they could do it then so could I, even if that forced me to be the more mature of us. That being said, if Carlisle crossed me, I wouldn't hesitate to lay down the law. He wasn't in charge anymore, and this was my city now. He needed to understand that.
He strode across the room, smartly dressed in one of his better suits and actually greeted me with a smile. I stood and buttoned my jacket. I hated to admit it, but even though I was a man in my own right, Carlisle was the man. The fucking clouds parted for him, and he had a level of control that came with time.
We shook hands before he pulled me into an unsuspecting hug. "Edward, my boy."
Either he was purposefully oblivious of the tension in our family, or he was choosing not to acknowledge it.
"Dad, it's nice to see you as well," I ground out, trying not to be repulsed by his hands on me.
"Sit, sit. We have a lot to talk about." He unbuttoned his coat and took a seat. I did the same. "This is the first time in a long time that we've been in the same room. Last I saw you, you were kicking me off of your front step."
"Yes, well, that was under different circumstances." I suddenly felt oppressed and suffocated in this little restaurant. "Let's start with you. Where exactly have you been?"
"Everywhere," he sighed. "You mother and I, as you could have probably guessed, needed a lot of work after everything was revealed. We went on spiritual trips in Tibet and China, volunteer excursions in Israel, and a rather odd archeological dig in Venezuela. It was a lot, but we spent every day together. It saved our marriage."
"I've never seen you so… animated." I looked him up and down. He was changed.
"I can't explain it. I feel so weightless these days. I have a lot to look forward to in retirement that I didn't even consider possibilities before."
"Yeah, that happens when you leave your son to do your dirty work."
Carlisle nodded. "You're angry with me."
"Is that a question?"
"No, it was a declarative statement."
"Hell yes, I'm mad at you!"
"Edward, watch your tone," he said seriously. "I never meant to leave you in a lurch. I thought you could handle things. I set everything up so that there would be as little problems as possible."
"It's not even that you left. I was expecting that, but to not leave any contact information? That's what pissed me off. Do you know how often I wanted to call you and just pick your brain? I made a mess of things for a while because of my stupidity…"
He interrupted me, "Oh, I know. Edward, why did you think I left you behind with no way of contacting me? Because it made you a better man; that's why. A better leader. If I was on your ass every five minutes, you would have ruled this city like I did. That's not what our family needed. You needed to make your mark."
Damn him for always being right.
"That doesn't make me feel any better." I rolled my eyes.
"It wasn't meant to. I never meant to leave to make you feel bad. Emmett could contact me if need be. If things ever got too bad. But you handled yourself well. I'm very proud of you."
"Well… thank you," I said strangely.
"And I am sorry for any troubles I caused." He really did seem regretful.
We stayed silent for a few minutes.
"I know you're still mad at me, but I am your father and I miss my family," Carlisle sighed. "Can you forgive me?"
"No," I snapped, "I don't forgive easily."
"Your grandfather taught you that."
"Fortunately for you, my wife is far more accommodating."
"Thank God or you wouldn't be here," he shot back. "Bella is one of the most courageous women I know and to put up with our shit… She's strong."
"That she is."
"I heard you had an incident last week. How is that going?"
"It's none of your concern." I shut him down once again.
Bella had bounced back extremely well. I had shown her a side of me that was too frightening, but she was handling it in her own way. She was hesitant, of course, although she hid it well. Bella was built for this life and told me as such. She just said it was shocking for her to see me in that way. I couldn't blame her.
"I understand," my father said. "It will take time to rebuild our relationship, but I'm glad we're meeting. That's the first step. A monk in Mongolia told me…"
I tuned him out because I was in no mode to hear his philosophical teachings of wisdom. I was over it for the night. We didn't discuss "the book" because he already knew how I felt about it. The thing was obscene and supposedly a history of our family. Anyone could read our dirty secrets and pick us apart. What if they made it into a movie? No one would be able to stomach that shit on screen. That thing would never be published as long as I was alive and Carlisle wouldn't dare try.
Awhile later, we moved onto more pressing matters.
"I see you haven't appointed a Consigliore." Carlisle said casually, even though his statement was anything but.
Consigliore: my right hand man, confidante, main advisor…
"I didn't think one was necessary."
"Oh? You plan on running our entire mafia operations by yourself?" He chuckled to himself.
"I have brothers. It's different if I was alone. They help out more than any one person could."
"Yes, but they need a chain of command."
"Maybe that's how you ran things, but I don't."
"But you should." He leaned in, "I'm trying to help, Edward. Please don't shut me out right now. I want you to succeed and you need help."
I thought for a long minute. He was right, but this was a decision I couldn't afford to make a wrong move with.
"I could…talk to Alec about it." I said quietly.
"I thought you would say that." Carlisle replied, not giving me any of his opinions or views.
Surprisingly, I found that I wanted to hear them.
Half an hour later, I wrapped up dinner. I couldn't take much more. My father paid and I stood outside, smoking, waiting for my car to be brought around by a valet.
"Edward, what are you up to tonight?" Carlisle asked me.
"Just some family business."
"Really?" His interest was piqued.
I bit my tongue for a second, choosing my words carefully. "It's a… planned execution, type thing."
"Sounds wonderful. Mind if I tag along?"
I suppressed my groan, but didn't answer. I really just wanted to get away from him right now. Too much Carlisle in such a short amount of time was not healthy.
"Come on," he nudged my shoulder, "give your old dad some fun."
"Fine," I growled.
Someone brought my Mercedes around, and I dropped a tip into his hand as he held the door open for me. I sunk into the seat, Carlisle getting in as well. I took off, faster than usual, but I had places to be.
"Edward, why are you speeding?" My father asked as I took sharp turns and evaded traffic. "Goodness, I know I taught you better than this."
"I've always driven this way. I like speed."
"Well, slow down. You're going to hurt someone."
"You can't tell me how to drive." I got defensive. "I'm a thirty year old man. I can drive how I want."
"This is ridiculous." Carlisle's face blanched. I was getting an odd sense of satisfaction watching him squirm. He was never one for fast cars. He was always more into just looking at them.
"Just sit back and stop worrying." I pushed the vehicle faster.
We reached our destination quickly, and I let up on the pedal as I reached the gates of a regular storage facility. It had rows upon rows of storage units that people could rent out to dump their stuff. It was all forgotten over the years, but as long as the monthly bill was paid, no questions were asked.
I put in the simple six digit code—my birthday—to enter the gates and drove quietly through the deserted alleyways.
"So, what exactly are we doing here?" Carlisle asked me.
"I have someone that needs to be disposed of," I answered simply.
"This wouldn't have anything to do with that hit list I keep hearing about, would it?"
"Who told you?" I swerved slightly.
"Alec."
"Of course," I grumbled.
"I think the idea is wonderful, if not overzealous and completely obsessive, but it should work well for you. You're insane enough to actually take everyone out before they catch you."
"I'm almost done. Just a few more names to go."
"You've always been extraordinarily gifted when it comes to this kind of thing."
I stopped in front of one of the smaller units. It was at the end of a row on the corner and pretty much the most secluded one I could rent. I shut the car off and got out with Carlisle following me to the door. The lock was simple and easily breakable, but if anyone wanted to rob me, they would be in for quite a shock once they opened it up.
The lock fell from the latch, and I lifted the door above my head.
There wasn't a light in the container, but the moon was bright enough to see inside.
The smell hit me first. It was putrid and rancid, all wrapped in a reek of overbearing filth. A man with pale skin and shaggy dark hair was resting in a wooden chair. Silver duct tape covered his mouth and his body was sunken in, the wasteful product of malnutrition and dehydration. He was naked and sitting in his own stench. I think this was day thirty of his imprisonment.
"Well, well, a Mangicavalo." Carlisle walked closer. "Impressive."
"The youngest son, Adriano. The father and oldest two are already dead. Everyone thinks they went back to Italy."
The man tried to raise his head, but didn't have enough strength to hold it up. His eyes were red, puffy, and jaundiced. He looked rather disgusting.
"He needs to be gone tonight." I shut the door behind me, enveloping us in darkness. The smell intensified. I took a handkerchief from my pocket, covering my mouth and nose, trying to dilute the odor a little.
I used the light from my cellphone to illuminate the area.
Carlisle was staring at him, inspecting his face and smirking superiorly. "I like this one. He's feisty."
"He's exhausted. He wants to die." I kicked the chair over. Adriano fell to the floor, his hands and feet bound, sloshing around in his own filth.
I withdrew my gun, prepared to kill, but Carlisle stopped me. "May I?"
"Oh, sure." I hesitantly pulled away. "If you'd like."
Withdrawing an even bigger gun, Carlisle hunched low over his victim.
It had been awhile since I'd seen my father in action and a familiar, cold tingle ran over my body. This man could make you bow with just one look. It was such a contrast, seeing him like this, compared to an hour ago when we were discussing the weather over grilled chicken eggrolls and spicy shrimp soup. He could turn his ruthlessness on and off like a light switch; a talent I had yet to master.
Carlisle ripped the tape from Adriano's mouth, taking along with it flakes of dried skin and blood. The area around his lips was raw with redness and irritation. Adriano was fed once every other day and kept in this storage unit for a month, for no other reason than for me to gain some sick pleasure from extracting every ounce of humanity left from him.
He writhed and yelled obscenities to the high heavens, begging for someone to hear him, pleading for a savior.
Carlisle shoved the barrel of his High Standard 22LR pistol sound suppressor deep into Adriano's mouth. He gaged and choked, but Carlisle pushed deeper, effectively gagging the man.
His kill was silent and excruciatingly gory. The shot was muffled and sounded like a soft thump into a pillow, but the bloody scene was far from relaxing. The back half of Adriano's head shot off and left a giant cavity. Brain matter, blood, muscle tissue and bone flew in different directions, coating the walls like a sadistic Jackson Pollack painting. It was oddly… beautiful.
I admired my father's handiwork as I swept my cellphone across the scene, letting the light travel into every nook and cranny.
"Simple and easy, like it was back in my day." Carlisle stood up, wiping his hands on his pants.
And that was that. Another member of my hit list down for the count.
The dogs followed me as I bound up the stairs, their clawed feet making noises on the hardwood as they raced me. I began pulling off bloody and soiled clothes as I went further down the hall, but I stayed quiet since the house was dark and silent.
The lights in my room were off, so I crept to the bathroom and jumped into a hot shower, cleansing my body from the filthy killing of the night. The scalding water beat on my skin and turned my flesh red. The steam enveloped the bathroom, almost suffocating me, but I welcomed it.
I got out of the shower and dried off minimally, shaking the water from my hair was I walked back into the room. I pulled on boxers and nothing else.
Bella was softly sleeping in bed, and the moon, which once brightened such a graphic, horrible scene earlier in the night, shone on her. I couldn't think of a better vision to come home to.
Bella liked to sleep in slouchy clothes; things of mine that she could move around in, but tonight, I was treated to something different. She was in some kind of black, lace lingerie. She was lying face down, the sheets of the bed wrapped around her legs, and since it was a rather warm night, she didn't find the need for a blanket, thank God.
The panties were sheer and skimpy, covering just enough of her perfect ass to entice, but still keep me guessing. The top was tight, fitted and lacey as well. It had straps that were falling from her shoulders, and a sliver of skin around her midriff was driving me insane.
I bit on my knuckles to quiet my lascivious and wanton noises.
I started at her calves, kissing and savoring each inch of silken flesh. She stirred slightly and moaned my name.
"Is that you?" she asked.
"No, it's some other man, sneaking into your bed at night." I continued up higher, to her thighs.
"Oh, well don't tell my husband." She giggled as my breath created gooseflesh on her body. "He can be an animal when he's jealous."
I growled.
Since the pregnancy, Bella had naturally gained some weight. I had convinced her not to lose it all, even though she was determined to get back to normal. She was naturally skinny and probably always would be, but she carried the few extra pounds nicely. I liked it a lot better that way. She was firm in all the right places and voluptuous in others. So tantalizing.
"I was waiting up for you. Sorry I fell asleep." Bella came alive, but didn't turn over. Pressing herself deeper into our mattress.
"This is such a nice surprise." I reached her ass, biting softly.
"I take it you like the clothes I bought today." Bella gasped with surprise as I smacked her cheek, causing a red mark.
"Why do you wear such things? You know I'm just going to rip them away from your body. They are a waste of money."
"Completely pointless?"
"I didn't say that."
"I thought it might be nice for a change."
"To tempt me further into wanting you? I thought it was impossible, but you keep surprising me."
"Maybe," she sighed, rolling over and opening her legs so that my head fit between them.
I kissed her inner thighs. My feather-light tough, making her wriggle and fidget above me. She bit her lip, running her hands through my wet hair and tugging, pulling me higher until I reached her lace covered center.
"You smell… so good," I rumbled through my chest.
This had the making of such a great night, but unfortunately, the babies had other plans.
"Damn," I nearly cried my own tears when I heard the wail from down the hall.
"One of them probably just needs a change." Bella sat up quickly.
The mood had passed, and I watched her jump out of bed, the lingerie forgotten as she put on a damned robe before running out of the room.
That night, after the babies had been settled, our lovemaking was slow and tender. I worshiped Bella's body until I had no more to give. When we were done, she tried to put on a shirt, but I wouldn't allow it. I pulled her close to my body, feeling her naked skin against mine, and let her sleep against me.
I couldn't shut my eyes and decided to forgo resting. I didn't even try. My brain just didn't want to shut down.
Sometime around four in the morning, I rolled out of bed, disentangling myself from Bella, and paced around the room for a bit. I was antsy, and for no particular reason other than the fact that I needed to move around. I didn't feel settled. I decided to do something productive.
I pulled the double doors of our closet open and looked around, thinking about re-organizing my ties. This was a process that would take me at least a couple of hours since I had so many. Once I was inside, though, I was shocked. It had been too long since I actually looked at our closet.
"This place is a mess," I said to myself.
I began with my half of the closet, pulling everything off of the racks, shelves, and hangers. I refolded hundreds of undershirts and re-balled socks, dress and casual, alike. I spent an hour polishing my shoes with an old rag. That took up the bulk of my time since my shoe collection was…extensive, to say the least.
I redid all the drawers, switching certain sections around. I had never liked my workout clothes in the bottom drawers, but Katy Nana insisted on it. I finally placed them on a top shelf where I could see them better. I then moved on to my suits, which I packaged up to be sent away for dry cleaning. All of them.
Most of the brands were Armani and Calvin Klein, the makings of a well-dressed man. I had tried out different things at some point, but didn't particularly like the fit or the colors or the fabrics. It was best to stick with what I knew.
Once I was done, sometime around seven, my side of the closet was spotless. I was very impressed with my work until I turned around and my face fell as I looked at Bella's mishap of clothes.
I nodded in determination as I got back to work.
By this time, the dogs were up and lying on the floor to watch me. It was a wonder what one week in dog training could do; Bosco actually listened to me when I told him to sit in the corner while I rearranged Bella's shoes. He wanted to bite the hell out of them. I could tell. But he stayed restrained.
Bella had more clothes than I did. I don't know how that happened, but her shelves were overflowing. The problem was that Bella didn't believe in organizing. She would hang things up wherever she was at the moment. I had to fix that. I pulled everything down, replacing it as I saw fit. She had hundreds of dresses that I sorted by color. I moved onto her shoes, categorized by heel height, and then alphabetically.
Armani, Burberry, Chanel, Christian Louboutin, Dona Karen, Jimmy Choo…
She had flats, boots, sneakers, and sandals, which I kept on the bottom rack of the closet. It always amused me when Bella wore anything with a heel. Not only was she so damned sexy in them, but she stayed upright, which was something I would have never seen five years ago.
Then came the handbags and purses, once again, done alphabetically.
Alexander McQueen, Bottega Veneta, Diane Von Furstenburg, Fendi, Gucci, Hermes…
I chuckled to myself, just thinking about exactly how much I had spent on her wardrobe in the past year or so. I probably didn't want to know.
I was on my hands and knees, going through her sleeping wear when I came across a simple blue and red plaid shirt. I held it in my hands, feeling the scratchy fabric. I remembered this shirt.
When I first met Bella, she used to always dress in plaid, a product of her Northwestern upbringing. They would always be too big on her, but she didn't care. It was endearing and confusing at the same time. Back then, I didn't understand it. Why would I ever be attracted to a girl who thought that plaid was a fashion statement? But Bella was different. Her fabric was abrasive, mine was soft. She had clothing that was outdated since 1980, mine was overly fashionable. She was plaid; I was silk. We should have never mixed, and somehow we did. But even then, I knew she was "the one". I couldn't help myself.
These thoughts seemed redundant to me since they had been rolling through my head since last week. I had tried to warn her to stay away, but she latched onto me and promised to never let go. That's why I loved her so much and always would.
"You're starting to sound crazy." I shook my head.
I stood up and decided to keep the plaid for myself. I neatly folded it and placed the shirt in one of my drawers, secretly hidden under a stack of freshly pressed light blue underwear.
"Edward, what are you doing?" Bella stumbled into the closet. Her sex hair was so glorious in the morning and she was pulling on the same lingerie that I swore I shredded last night, but somehow survived.
"I'm spring cleaning," I answered, making sure to shut the drawer with her plaid shirt in it. She wasn't getting that back.
Bella looked around, her face filled with confusion. "What happened to all of my clothes?"
"I organized them. Don't you like it?"
"Sure." Her brow furrowed as she ran her hands along her coats and jackets.
"I couldn't sleep, so I decided to get this done while I had the energy," I explained.
The dogs ran to Bella, licking at her legs. She pet them eagerly. "Well, that's good, I guess. I hope you weren't up all night with this."
"No, not at all. It was rather quick, actually."
She tripped over a pile on the floor. "Edward, what are my dresses doing down here." She picked one up.
"That's the stuff I'm throwing out."
"Throwing out?" Her voice went up an octave.
"Yes," I answered with finality. "Those dressed are too short for you. You can't wear that stuff."
"Says who? And they are not too short."
"That thing barely covers your ass," I argued.
"You're exaggerating. I'm not throwing any of them out. I happen to like these dresses. They're for summer BBQs and girl's night out." She started to hastily pick them up.
"Bella, I'm not fighting you on this. Leave them on the floor so Katy Nana came get rid of them."
"You never seemed to have a problem before with my dresses. As I recall, you like my legs."
"Don't patronize me. Your legs are for me. Not everyone else." I wrapped her in my arms.
"They aren't that short, Edward." She sighed. "Can we compromise?"
"No," I said immediately then amended my answer when she glared at me. "Maybe."
We agreed on throwing out all dresses that didn't come to at least three inches above the knee, but I think she tricked me because Bella only had about two of those. I measured. I ground my teeth together as I watched her hang them back up, just thinking about all the filthy men I would have to fight when we walked down the street or when she would visit me at my office.
"I still don't like this." I stood against the opposite wall and crossed my arms.
"You'll be fine." She rose on her toes to kiss me. "Come help me with the babies."
We left the closet, my mind finally free from clothing, and went to the nursery. It had been repainted recently, a six-month birthday gift to the babies. The pastel colors had been covered over with fantastic scenes from Mother Goose stories. I didn't know any of them personally, but they looked kind of calming and playful.
Roman was up and giggling when I picked him up.
"Hey, buddy." I bounced him in my arms. "You look so happy today. What's going on?"
He reached for my face, patting my checks with his chubby hands.
"He recognizes you." Bella lifted up Sophia.
"Of course he does."
As I looked at the picture before me, I never thought I would get to a place like this. I had a wife, two kids, dogs, and a stable life. And to tell you the truth, I wouldn't have it any other way. What the hell happened to me?
I chuckled to myself, kissing the top of Roman's head.
"What's wrong?" Bella asked me.
"Absolutely nothing."
HOLY PRECIOUSNESS BATMAN
I think Edward is finding his balance. Family and Work.
Carlisle and Esme are coming around as well. I know we're all happy to see that finally being talked about.
I'm preparing to end this sucker by watching several movies for inspiration. We still have probably ten more chapters or so, maybe less, but I'm trying to piece it all together. Should be fun with some surprises in store.
AS ALWAYS, Thanks to Jenny for the beta work
TO ALL LDV READERS: I know you want a sequel and I know I promised one. You've been so patient and I'm incredibly sorry it's taken me...years to even begin to talk about the sequel. Here's the thing, I dont have a good enough story to put out there for a sequel. As of now, it's like a piece of shit short-story that doesn't have any depth or memorable moments. I hate it. I would love to put something out there that's worthy of being posted, but right now it's not coming together. I am trying. Maybe I can get something appropriate, but as of now, it's just not looking good. Again, so sorry. IT"S OK TO HATE ME FOR THIS. I understand.
Until next time, Adios