I have returned on time! I am so happy I was able to meet my deadline I had set. After everything with season 2 I didn't want to let you guys down. But here we are with the newest chapter and I am so happy for this. Oh and thank you to everyone who wished me and my family well after Hurricane Harvey. That was very sweet of you guys and I wish all those who were affected by Hurricane Irma well. I will keep you guys in my prayers.
Thank you to Belletiger_BT, lilshu65, StarMaiden+BLANK, KarmaDash_is_ShippingTrash, TsubasaHimeChan, buleemozar, Masterliful, strawberry_milk_forever, MrGeneric and Fire_kissed for you sweet reviews. I was beyond tickled to receive some many reviews and I am also happy many of you liked the interaction between Kolivan and Lance. There will be more soon trust me!
StarMaiden+BLANK did bring up a very valid point and argument that the lion switch between Allura and Lance should have not happened. I found myself agreeing with this actually. For me it didn't really fit either and it was a strange fit for me. But we will have to see what I decided to do in the chapters now wont we.
OK so as far as notes for this chapter and actually all chapters to come I should address something first. So remember when I said the angst was going away? Well that was before I decided to write into the seasons so yeah all aboard the character development and shitty times. If you guys want to know where I plan to go as far as feeling and emotions in the coming chapters lets just say I rewatched and are re reading Berserk the anime and manga in order to get in the mood to write my upcoming chapters. So yeah shit is about to real dark real fast. But don't worry those out there who have read or watched Berserk. I will not go the Griffith route here and all that with Lance. For those of you who don't know what the hell I'm talking about, just prepare your tissues.
As always please comment,kudos and bookmark! It means so much to mean to hear your guys opinions so feel free to chat with me here or on tumblr.
"See this is exactly why I didn't want to tell you anything."
"Face it Lance they don't need you. In fact they could probably care less about what happens to you. I mean surely there would have been reports of them asking about you. As far as their concerned they are better off without you."
"It wont be like with you Lance trust me. This time I actually wont give up halfway,"
"Oh Lance, you are broken beyond repair and no one cares, they don't even notice."
Whispers in the dark as Lance stood there. There was nothing but pitch black around him as he stood motionless. Nothing to indicate where he was or what was happening. Only the constant whispers of familiar voices to keep him company. However instead of feeling panicked he felt calm. No not calm, that wasn't the right word for it. The longer he stood there will dull eyes did he feel more…dead. Yes that was the right word for it. Not even the purple clawed hand coming up to wrap around his throat from behind fazed him. No, it was a hand he was all to familiar with.
"Did you think you had seen the last of me?" that all to familiar voice curled around his ear.
The sad thing was that yes, for those few bliss filled weeks with Keith he did.
"Lance?"
Opening his eyes he was aware of the tears running down the sides of his face and unto his pillow. Weird he didn't remember crying in his dream. Sitting up slowly he was a little shocked to see Allura standing in the door way. He had heard her call him but he wasn't sure if it was her at first. It seemed it was though as she quietly entered his room and took a seat on the bed beside him.
"Lance its time for the meeting," she reminded him gently. Head titled in consideration as she watched him with her hands resting in her lap.
"Sorry I didn't mean to oversleep," he answered as he wiped away his tears the best he could.
Something didn't feel right as he sat there. Normally he would be embarrassed to cry in front of anyone but as he sat their he found he felt nothing. No heat of shame bleeding into his cheeks nor any desire to turn away and hide. It was almost as if all the care he once had was gone as he sat there. Tears still running down his face and he stared at nothing. Why did he feel like this?
Startling at the feeling of warm hands cupping his cheeks his eyes turned towards Allura who had one of the most sympathetic smiles on her face. Her thumbs coming up to rub away softly at the tears cascading from his eyes. Warmth if only a little began to seep back into him. Starting from his cheeks down to his toes he could feel a soft pulse spreading.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Allura whispered almost as if in fear that any louder and she would spook Lance.
Shaking his head Lance let his eyes close for the moment as he let Allura cradle his face. He could feel the warmth pulsing and fighting off the odd feeling he had inside. Valiantly keeping away the things Lance could feel but had no name for at the moment.
So caught up was he in that moment that he missed the sound of the door whooshing open or throat being cleared. Pulling apart from each other Allura turned to look at their newest edition to the room while Lance merely lifted his eyes. Standing in the door was non other than Keith with one of the most blank expressions Lance had ever seen on his face.
Lance realized how the situation must have looked. His eyes closed while he leaned into Allura's touch who in turn cradled Lance's face with such care. But instead of feeling dread at the for sure misunderstanding or even trying to explain what was happening something else festered inside him. He wanted Keith to react. To scream and rage like he knew he could. Anger contorting his beautiful features as he rained down accusations on them. Possessiveness taking over as he would let it be known that no one took away Lance from him. He wanted Keith to be jealous, to be raging with the envy Lance was all to familiar with.
But none of this happened. No instead he adjusted his hold on his helmet under his arm while pointing over his shoulder with his other hand. "Everyone's waiting in the Black lions hangar." And that was all he said on the matter as he turned and begun to make his way down there himself.
Allura seemed not affected by the events that had taken place one bit as she stood. Lance on the other hand was not doing well. In fact it was almost as if something was threatening to claw its way out of his chest as he clutched the front of his shirt. Insides churning as if something was tearing at them.
"Lance? Lance are you ok?"
Snapping out of it he looked up to see Allura looking at him with concern splashed across her face. Eyebrows pulled together and mouth down-turned as she watched Lance. Seeing the worry he was causing her and wishing to do anything but talk about it he was quick to stand.
"Yeah I'm fine just some heart burn from the food last night," he laughed as he pulled on his shoes.
As he did so he missed the unconvinced look of worry Allura fixed him with. Her mouth opening to say something, anything to get Lance out of the strange mood that he was in. But for the life of her she couldn't think of anything. Her mind running in circles as she chased after ideas. How did you comfort someone when you didn't know exactly what was wrong. Yes, she knew he was upset about Keith and his relationship at the moment but for some reason she felt at the moment it was more than that. Like she could almost see something building within him.
But she never got a chance to pin point what it was exactly as Lance turned to her with a soft smile. "I'll meet you down there after I go pull on my armor," he said as he begun to walk out.
Left with no choice but to nod and follow she watched him go, unease sitting in her heart as she did. But as much as she wanted to address whatever was eating at Lance at the moment they had other important matters at hand. Today was the day they would see if the Black lion would choose anyone of them as a replacement paladin. Maker knows they needed this right now. However as she watched Lance go she picked up on a soft tune he was whistling. Cocking her head to the side she tried to get a better listen as she racked her brain where she had heard that tune before. A tune she had caught Lance whistling to in the past. However no matter how hard she tried she couldn't remember where she had heard it. She supposed it wasn't important as the tune faded as Lance walked down the hall.
Meeting in Blacks landing area was a quiet and almost tense affair. Everyone suited up in their paladin armor as they stared at the hulking mass of machinery. They all knew the Black lion was the biggest lion out of all of them but never had it seemed so imposing. Even collapsed as it was it still gave off that regal presence as it laid there. Commanding respect even though at the moment it was little more than a fallen king.
Last night it had come to all their attentions that Shiro had proclaimed Keith the next leader and Black paladin. Something he had done in front of no one not to mention the fact that he had not bothered to consult anyone on the matter either. No instead they all had to deal with the fact that Shiro had decided such an important manner without asking anyone else their opinion on the subject. It was this fact that had Lance narrowing his eyes ever so slightly as he regarded Keith. And the other had the audacity to not want it.
His frustration only grew with Keith though as they each went one by one. Allura convinced but not upset that she was not the one meant to pilot the Black lion. Pidge wasn't even tall enough to reach the controls so Lance wasn't surprised that she wasn't it either. That left Hunk, Keith and him. One who wouldn't mind having it, one who didn't want it and the last who was undecided.
As Hunk took another turn he thought on the idea. If he was chosen did he even want to lead the team? To take up the role Shiro seemed to fit so perfectly and try and fill it. He would be responsible for all of them not to mention the many people out there who needed their help. They would look to him for leadership but could he give it?
"Lance its your turn," snapping out of it he realized everyone was looking at him. Expressions curious as to why he was no doubt lost in his head. Well at least Hunk and Pidge had curious looks. Allura only seemed worried while Keith's expression was unreadable. Shoving his helmet on as an almost barrier against Keith and Allura's looks he made his way to Black's open mouth. Feet feeling like they were dragging as he walked up their ramp and in.
Once he reached the cockpit he couldn't help but pause and stare down sadly at Shiro's chair. Well he supposed it was technically the pilot seat he didn't think he could refer to it like that. No not yet while the wounds were still fresh. To him this would always be Shiro's rightful place and he was encroaching on it.
Gingerly taking a seat he didn't bother putting his hands on the controls. No instead he let his hands twine together in his lap as he stared down at his feet. Well at least he could reach the floor and everything he mused. As he sat there he thought on his current predicament. Did he really want to be the Black paladin or was it more of him not wanting Keith to be it.
Contrary to what the other paladins likely thought it wasn't out of complete spite that he didn't want Keith to be the leader. Yes his anger at the other did factor in but it was only a part. This was a big responsibility and he could see why Keith didn't want it. He was use to doing things at his own pace and if he was chosen to be the Black paladin than that would be sacrificed. He would have to advance the team and not himself. Work with them and have the confidence to stand by himself. The courage to make decision none of them liked thinking about and the compassion to listen to them. There was also the matter that he was part Galra and Zarkon who was the original Black paladin was also Galra. Yeah that was probably a big factor in it all as well as Lance knew Keith didn't want to replace Shiro yet. That if he did they might as well pronounce Shiro dead.
But as he sat there and thought, did he even have the qualifications to do this? Was he confident enough to lead them all into battles when he wasn't even confident half the time in himself. Did he have the courage to choose the right decision at the moment. Could he shoulder the expectations of them all and be responsible for the consequences. And even if he did find it in himself to do all of this what about his body?
As if on queue his fingers on his right hand begun to ache. Winching he did his best to rub soothingly at them with his other hand. Feeling the scars that lay under his thin suit. Even with that magical stuff Irant used he was sure there was some nerve damage. Internal damage that had been made after having his fingers cut off again and again. And this wasn't the only part on him that acted. No he never expressed it much but there would be times where his body ached. Nights where he prayed Keith would not wake as his arms twitched with phantom pains and his legs shook. Even with the miracles that advanced healing pod had on him he still felt tendrils of pain creeping up on him. Daily reminders that he would never be rid of the scars that littered his body and the pain would be a constant companion.
Out of all of them he was the last one that needed to be the Black paladin. No all he would bring would be strife and he doubted very much so that his body could even take such a toll. He ran a greater chance of collapsing more than anything. This was not greatness he was meant for.
"As far as their concerned they are better off without you."
Startling at the voice Lance whipped his head around only not to see anything. That wasn't right. He knew he heard that voice clear as day. Gulping Lance tried to relax but froze at the voice that spoke right against his ear.
" You know when jesters no longer serve their purpose we Galra kill them. I wonder if your beloved will take up that practice?" No not again. He couldn't take hearing that voice again.
As much as Lance knew Keith would never do something like that he couldn't help the sob that escaped his throat as his hand flew to Black's controls. Squeezing his eyes shut he ignored the tears that washed down his face as he poured everything into trying to get through to Black. Knuckles going white as his grip tightened.
"We rise by lifting others. I suppose you could look at that in a positive light but in my opinion you would qualify as nothing more than a stepping stone. Something to be grinned and smashed into the ground so others may rise to glory," Irant continued to mock, voice drifting all around him.
The tears were coming faster now as he sobbed. Refusing to let go of Blacks controls he was down to pleading now. "Please I need to do this! I can't sit by and have Keith bare this burden. What good am I if I do?" he sobbed.
"Oh Lance, I believe you know the answer to that already."
There was no use anymore. He wasn't meant to be the Black paladin that much was clear. Letting his hand slide of the controls he yanked his helmet off before tossing it to the ground. Even with Irant's voice no longer ringing in his head he couldn't help the sobs that wracked his body as he clutched his hands to his face. For all the love he felt for Keith at that moment it sat like a cold stone in his heart. Even in this he couldn't support Keith.
He must have sat in there for half a varga before he calmed down and was sure his face was back to normal. He had forgotten he was sort of an ugly crier and it was obvious whenever he did. The fact that he spent who knows how long on crying alone was definitely not something the team need to know. Not to mention the reason why for his emotional breakdown at the moment.
Sniffling he stood and gathered his helmet from where he had tossed it unto the ground. Not bothering to even put it back on he made his way outside where he could see the others anxiously waiting. Guilt tore threw him though when he laid eyes on Keith. A look of dread set deep as they all knew what Lance's failure meant for Keith. Unless the Black lion decided it didn't want him either than it was clear he was to be its paladin. So much for him not wanting it and all.
Still though even with everything considered the sting of when Keith stepped out of the newly awakened Black was ever present. That was a big fat rejection for the lot of them if Lance had ever seen one. Not only was he not good enough to even pilot the Black lion he wasn't good enough to shoulder the burden for Keith. It was clear from the others miserable face that this was the last thing he wanted.
Though he wasn't prepared for Keith to flat out reject the idea either. He watched in bafflement as Keith and Allura argued over the matter. Tempers running high on both sides as Allura accused Keith of being selfish and Keith yelling that he couldn't replace Shiro.
Ah so he finally said it. Of course Lance new the whole time what Keith's main problem with the whole thing was. But now for him to come and start to voice his feelings? Now they were making progress. And even with all the anger and frustration he felt for the other there was still so much love there. For every fault Keith possessed for every thing he pissed Lance off about, there were thousands of other things he could name in place that he loved about the other. There was still times where he was unsure if he had been given up on but Lance knew for sure he would never give up on Keith. Even if everything fell apart around them he would always be there for him.
Stepping forward while the others backed away he took Keith's hand into his own. Holding unto him gently it took him a moment to find the words as he stared at their linked hands. Conscious of Keith's gaze focused solely on him. Gaze intense but still tinged with a level of tenderness and curiosity. Taking a deep breath he gathered what he was going to say. To organize his emotions that he wanted, no needed to express to the other.
"Keith none of us could ever replace Shiro. And I know its frightening but the Black lion has chosen you to lead us. We-I trust you and their decision."
Oh and there it was. For a brief moment swore he saw Keith's walls collapse as he looked at him with such raw emotion. Fear and regret washing over his face before his mask of bravery swallowed it all. The fear Lance could understand but the regret? Thinking back to his words Lance wondered if it was regret that even in all of this he still trusted Keith but the other hadn't done the same. If so maybe there relationship wasn't to damaged after all.
But there was not time do dwell on it as Keith brought up their next problem, "So whos going to fly the Red lion?"
First that fucking voice was back. Than apparently he wasn't good enough to even be considered to lead Voltron and fly the Black lion. Now Blue wasn't letting him and the others had already taken off. Oh and let him add to the list that Zarkon has a son now and the rest were being attacked as he stood there.
Groaning in frustration he approached Blue's barrier. Hands coming up to press lightly on it only to have his agitation go up further when there was no sign of it giving. Just what the hell was going on?
"Oh come on Blue its me! Lancey Lance your beloved paladin. Oh come on!" He groaned as he slammed his fist into the barrier. Little good that did though but give him a throbbing hand.
"I…don't understand. Why wont you let me in?" He asked as he looked up as their imposing form. Still nothing though as they remained unresponsive.
Thinking about it Lance thought maybe they were being jealous. He knew the lions weren't fond of their paladins getting to chummy with the others but still surely Blue knew it was for a good purpose. It wasn't as if he liked Black better than them or something. If that was what this was about than some reassurance should do the trick.
"Blue I'm sorry if you thought I wanted to pilot Black more than you. I just- it was something I needed to do for Keith and for-for myself.," he admitted. Eyes looking up at Blue with hope that they would understand but still no reply.
Gritting his teeth he pressed his forehead against Blue's barrier. His eyes beginning to well up with tears as he struggled to reign in his emotions. "Please Blue they need me. I need to be of some use, please," the tears were rolling down his face freely now as he struggled to regain himself.
He was so caught up in his emotions that he missed the hand coming to rest gently on his shoulder. "Lance what's going on?" Allura asked in a soft but still urgent tone.
"I- I don't know. Blue is shutting me out. I cant get them to listen to me. Allura I hate to say this but maybe…maybe I'm not meant to do this anymore. There's something in me that I cant fix and maybe the lions sense it. This may be them trying to tell me I'm not meant to be a paladin anymore," He didn't mean for all of it to spill out but now it was to late. Being the mysterious entities that they were Lance would not be surprised if they sensed the sticky darkness that was starting to encase his heart again. Maybe they heard the voice in his head that had tormented him for so long.
"Lance that's not true! The lions-" Allura started to argue but she never got a chance to finish as a loud roar erupted around them.
"What the hell was that?" He asked as he whipped his head up to look at Blue, hopeful that they had decided to let Lance in. Still nothing though as they remained unresponsive.
"Lance it's the Red lion. Its calling for you!" Allura exclaimed as she begun to push him in the direction of their hangar.
"Wow, wow hold on! There's no way it wants me to fly them especially with Keith and I fighting and all that," he argued as he dug his heels into the ground.
Huffing Allura was quick to turn him around and press reassuring hand unto his shoulder. "Lance the lions may be bonded to you paladins but they have emotions and thoughts of their own. What Keith is feeling now may not be at all what Red is," she explained.
"That still doesn't answer why Red would want me as a pilot instead of you."
"Lance my father built Voltron but the knew Zarkon would was a better leader in battle, so he became Voltron's right hand. When you accepted Keith as the new leader of Voltron and even went as far as to place your trust in him once again, it proved that you valued a strong team over your own need for glory. That you value advancing the team over yourself. Just like my father."
Ah yet another name he had to live up to now. First he was compared to Thace and now Allura's father. It was a honor of course but underneath it all he could feel a sense of pressure begun to well up. The expectations to be great like them threatening to overwhelm him. But he couldn't let it. No not now at least. For now he would need to push it back to private times spent in his room. Not when he was expected to go into battle and support his family.
"I wont let him down," he answered as he slipped out of her grip and begun to race towards Red's hangar.
Arriving in Red's hangar he had to marvel that even thought they were smaller than Blue they were still quite imposing in their own right. Though his faced glowed with fascination when Red begun to power up at his arrival and a steady purr was heard throughout the hangar. Well it was nice to know that at least Red wasn't mad at him as well like Keith.
Approaching with care he couldn't help the squeal of surprise when Red thrust their face right in front of him, mouth falling open to let him in. Wanting to hurry but still cautious of this new development Lance was careful as he made his way into Red's cockpit. Taking a seat in the pilot chair he had to pout a little at the fact that he didn't have to adjust the seat any. Curse Keith and his growth spurt.
But there was no time to dwell on the matter as he could hear the others struggling out there. Taking a deep breath he let his hands come to rest on Red's controls. Startling a bit at the automatic warmth that they radiated. In fact now that he thought about the whole cockpit was emanating a soft warmth. If it wasn't for how serious the situation was outside right now Lance would be more than happy to sleep in here.
"Ok Red I'm ready," he breathed as he clutched unto the controls.
The resounding rush of heat and excitement that coursed through made his head sway as Red roared to life. A loving purr coming to wrap around him as he begun to move the controls. So much adoration and interest radiating into him that he had a hard time making sense of it all. Was this… how Red felt about him?
Reading his mind a soft purr of confirmation was sent back at the heat evened out and became more of a soft glow. Well that was quite interesting. Keith never spoke on what Red thought of him and now Lance wished he had asked earlier. To have someone this excited to be with him, it was comforting.
Grinning Lance wasted no time in yanking Red controls back and zooming out of the hangar. Heart beating like crazy as Red encouraged him to go faster. Their excitement contagious as he zoomed towards the battle field. Now he could see why Keith was so reckless and quick to action when he flew Red. It was almost intoxicating how Red pushed his senses to their limit as they urged him to fly them however they wanted. For once in his life he felt like he was in control for once.
Little did he know though that unlike Blue, Reds emotions were a little more intense. They were quick and when they hit it was almost a like a sucker punch to the gut as far as the intensity went. Lance wouldn't have to wait long to find this out though as he could feel rage building in him as he watched the Black lion take a hit from Lotor's ships cannon.
With a growl Lance pushed forward. Eyes expanding as if he was the one who was on a hunt. Hands gripping the controls as tight as he could as he shot laser after laser at the drones. It was a miracle he wasn't foaming at the mouth with rage and pure instinct as Red pushed them forward. Faster, faster, even faster they seemed to scream as Lance twisted and turned around the small fighter drones. God he had never felt this alive flying before.
"Lance be careful with Red! Don't let their emotions consume you," Keith warned as he watched Red tear through the battle field. He knew how they were, if you didn't keep a short leash on Red they would take every opportunity to push you to go their speed. And as good of a rush as it felt to give into the primal urges they gushed it would lead to a mistake here and there eventually. Like Lance just narrowly missing colliding with Lotor's ship.
But he did have to admit watching Lance fly Red around with such excitement and joy made his own blood quicken. The obnoxiously possessive side of him preening at the idea that his mate was even more connected to him know. That with this he was even more his than anything else. Realizing where his train of thought was going Keith quickly shook his head. Growling in frustration with this recent development. He didn't want to admit it but it was clear ever since he underwent those trials the Galra side of him was starting to make itself known. The fact that he referred to Lance as his mate just now was proof of that.
Now was not the time to deal with his heritage problems though. Even with the help of Lance they were still a mess and now Lotor was attacking the castle. There was no way they could protect the castle and take on Lotor at the same time. It also didn't help that his teammates frustrations with him were beginning to show.
"Oh for the love of- Keith you are the leader now. What should we do?" Pidge barked.
And there was the other half of his problem right now. He knew he needed to lead them and figure out a plan but so far he was failing. He wasn't use to Black's controls yet and faced with a new enemy he didn't know what was for the best. In truth they didn't even need Voltron for this. There were multitudes of formations they could use that would take care of the job. But no matter how hard he tried to remember them his mind only drew a blank. Never mind Black's routes he wasn't sure he could even remember Red's in the heat of battle right now. Everything was a huge mess right now and they might as well be making fools of themselves. So much for being Shiro's successor.
"Its to soon to give up paladins!" Allura's voice commanded over the mic.
Turning they were all amazed to see Blue flying towards them with non other than Allura as its pilot. How many weeks had it been since they had all of their lions together like this? It was a beacon of hope as they all realized they were starting to get somewhere. For once not everything was a big mess. It only got better though when Lotor's ship begun to retreat.
Cheers and sighs of relief filled the air as they all celebrated their slim victory. That was all except for one paladin. Even with the soothing purr's of reassurance from Red Lance could still feel something ugly twisting in his gut. Not only was he not good enough to fly Blue now but apparently they had chosen Allura over him. After everything they had been through together? After he had worked so hard to protect them when they were captured. All the times he cried alone in the middle of that God forsaken jungle without even their calming energy to comfort him. And the absolute relief he felt when he saw that Blue had been fixed and was running again. For it all to mean nothing now? That hurt more than he could ever imagine.
"Lance? Lance!" snapping out of it he became aware of Pidge calling out to him as they begun to head back to the ship.
"You ok?" she asked as she floated nearby him and Red.
"Yeah sorry just had some stuff on my mind," he answered as he tried to dispel the negative thoughts that were trying to resurface. Now was not the time nor the place to be having such thoughts.
"If you say so. Come on, everyone's heading back to the castle."
Following Pidge back he tried his best to squash everything he was feeling at the moment. He should feel happy for Allura not bitter that Blue had chosen a new pilot. With her flying a lion now they were back to having all five of them out there and they could form Voltron again. It was better for the team this way.
Landing Red in their hangar had an almost odd feeling to. For one they landed in a more… well a more refined manner than Blue Lance supposed he should call it. Now that wasn't saying Blue was clumsy or anything but there was always an air of excitement around them. Here with Red it was more of a simmer as if they wanted to be the mature one. If it wasn't for his less than stellar mood he would have laughed at the way Red seemed to preen under the attention he was giving to them. Nice to know at least they liked him even with Keith and his fight right now.
Exiting Red and making his way to Blue's hangar he was aware of that sticky darkness welling up inside of him. Aware of the feeling that he needed to claw his own skin off to dispel the feeling. Never had he felt so out of place in his own body. Everything was wrong and he had no idea how to fix it.
It wasn't until he was standing directly in front of Blue that the feelings only intensified. Looking up at their imposing form he felt almost hollow. Like any emotions he had left had been drained in his flying with Red. Was he suppose to feel upset by the loss of Blue or accept it with a smile. Why was this so hard to deal with?
"They miss you just as much Lance," turning to face the voice he was surprised to see Allura standing there in her own pink paladin armor.
"Pink, huh?" he couldn't help but tease. She looked good in anything didn't she?
Smiling at Lance's teasing words Allura approached him, " On Altea we wear this color to honor our fallen warriors."
"I see. Did you wear it often when I was gone?" he had no idea why he blurted out those words but it was to late to take them back now.
Seeming to be taken aback Allura reached out and let her hand rest on Lance's shoulder. A soft supportive gesture as she smiled a almost bitter sweet smile at him. "Those days were so miserable I don't even remember what I was wearing half the time."
Desperate to change the subject now Lance realized there was one thing he needed to do to solidify Allura's new status as Blue paladin. Manifesting his bayard he took a moment to feel the weight in his hand one last time before handing it over to her.
"Here, I believe this is yours now."
Seeing the significance in the gesture Allura's face lit up in a soft happy glow as she took the bayard from Lance. "Thank you Lance. I suppose now you must get your new one from Keith now."
"Ah yeah, I have no idea how that's going to play out," he chuckled but Allura did not miss the unease that tinted his tone. Oh if Keith continued to hurt Lance like this he would be hearing a few choice words from her that was for sure.
For now she would have to settle with trying to lift up Lance's mood the best she could, "Things will get better Lance."
But before she could hear a reply from Lance they were interrupted by Coran, "Princess the Black lion is leaving the castle!"
Ah things could never be simple for once could they?
So yes here we can see Lance's trauma coming back. With everything that happened with Keith I wanted to explore Lance dealing with it on his own as well as him developing healthy supportive relationships with others like Allura and Kolivan.
Another note is it's a head canon of mine and something I like to imagine in Keith's Galra side coming out with his recent awakening. It's a interesting concept and I am looking forward to exploring it in this fic.
As far as the lion switch I decided to go ahead with it as I wanted to explore Red and Lance's bond as well as Lance's loss of Blue. Seeing as this is a huge change for Lance and he is less than a ideal place for me its something interesting to write.
See you guys next Thursday!