Chapter 38: Guilt trip

[Scene: A four hundred year old brick cellar strung up with Christmas lights and converted into a jazzclub. Kunzite is drinking beer out of the bottle with his arm around Zoi. Zoi's practically in Kunzite's lap and is enjoying the band, which consists of a piano, bass, trumpet, guitar, and drums.]

[A Roma woman comes by selling roses and Kunzite buys a pink rosebud for Zoi, which of course Zoi accepts with a great deal of happiness.]

Zoi: [Between sets] Do we have any plans for tomorrow?

Kunzite: There is a cherry blossom festival going on that I really want to take you to. But because of the time difference, we'd have to go before school starts, so I'd need to pick you up at five am.

Zoi: [conflicted since he'd dearly love to see a cherry blossom festival, but the clock says it's close to midnight already] I want to, but that not going to give me a lot of time to sleep.

Kunzite: [shows Zoi his watch] It's only three thirty in the afternoon.

[Zoi has only had a glass of wine at dinner, and a few swallows of Kunzite's beer. But that's a glass of wine and a few swallows of beer more than he's had before, so he laughs like that's the funniest thing in the world]

[The next songs starts, so Zoi cuddles up to Kunzite to enjoy the music. It goes on and on and on…]

[At last the band asks if anyone has any requests.]

Zoi: [shouts] Play some Jerry Lee Lewis!

[This gets a laugh from crowd, who are mostly French and British.]

[The pianist makes a face at Zoi, muttering in French into the mic about stupid t-shirt wearing yanks and their rockabilly music. The other band members roll their eyes at him since they don't really share his sentiments.]

[Normally, Zoi would be mortified. But he's a bit tipsy.]

Zoi: [In French] What? Is it because you can't do it? Or because you don't know it? Because if you don't know it, I'd be happy to get up there and teach it to you!

Crowd: Ooooooh!

[Zoi's afraid he's embarrassed Kunzite with his heckling, but Kunzite's just holding him grinning.]

[The band seems to share Kunzite's amusement, so the pianist rises and makes a bow and flourish at the piano.]

Pianist: [In English] Bring it on.

[The crowd laughs at the slur]

[Zoi gets up and Kunzite has to hold him at first to steady him, but makes no move to stop him. He walks past the pianist who has his fist raised and up the piano stool to spin the seat to adjust for his height. The rest of the band watches in amusement, unsure of what they are going to get.]

[Then he puts his hand on the keyboard and starts banging out a perfect rendition of "Great Balls of Fire."]

[The crowd goes wild]

[Soon the rest of the band joins in. The pianist is so mortified, he flees the stage.]

[Kunzite beams with pride then turns to the crowd and gives them a look that says, "He's mine. Don't even think about it."]

[After a few songs, Zoi returns to his seat]

Kunzite: [stares at Zoi with a big adoring smile] You never told you're a piano virtuoso.

Zoi: Yeah, well it's kind of a useless skill to have.

Kunzite: You really have no idea how extraordinary you are, do you?

[Later: Kunzite drives him home. Zoi's sleepy, so he's a bit surprised to discover it's not even dark out. They pull up outside the house.]

Zoi: Do I smell like beer?

Kunzite: I'm afraid you do. And your father's watching TV in the livingroom. I think you'd better bypass the front door. Hold your breath.

Zoi: wh–

[Kunzite grabs Zoi and before he can even finish the word, there's a magenta flash they're in his bedroom.]

Zoi: –y? Oh. Nevermind.

Kunzite: Should I come back here tomorrow at five to pick you up?

Zoi: Please do. [hugs Kunzite] Thanks for bringing me to Paris. I had a great time. [He leans forwards to give Kunzite a kiss, but Kunzite holds him at arm length and gives him a kiss on the forehead]

Kunzite: No. You've been drinking. Lips that touch alcohol, will never touch mine.

Zoi: [giggles] You teetotaler.

[Kunzite vanishes and Zoi picks up a budvase and carries it into the bathroom to fill it with water. Then he brushes his teeth and gargles with mouthwash for good measure. As he opens the door his father is standing outside. Zoi nearly drops the vase in shock.]

Zoi: [covers his mouth with his hand] Geez, dad. Don't scare me like that.

Chief Midori: Sorry. I didn't realize you were home until I heard the water running. I didn't hear you come in. What you do, crawl in a window?

Zoi: [still covering his mouth] No dad, that's silly.

Chief Midori: Why are you covering your mouth like that?

Zoi: I have a bit of a cold. Don't get too close. [coughs dramatically]

Chief Midori: [feels his forehead] You do feel a bit feverish.

[Zoi doesn't have to put on much of an act to look ill. He can't stand lying to his father like this. Especially since his father has treated him with nothing but the utmost love and kindness since the moment he moved in.]

[And now, in a single afternoon, Zoi has broken nearly promise he's made to his father: no drinking, no lying, no secrets, no ditching school, no hanging out with older boys, no staying out past dark, no sneaking into clubs…He hasn't broken the 'no sex' one yet, but he has a feeling that's not too far off. *]

[*At least not if Zoi's hormones get a say in the matter.]

Zoi: The nurse called my ride and he brought me home early. You probably just didn't notice since it was so early.

Chief Midori: Oh, ok. Can I take you to the doctor tomorrow?

Zoi: No, Dad. I'm fine. I feel a lot better already. In fact, I'll probably go right to sleep and then leave for school early tomorrow to get caught up in the library.

Chief Midori: Is that cigarette smoke I smell on your clothes?

Zoi: [miserable] You can smell that? Some woman was smoking outside the school when I was waiting outside. I didn't know I got it on me.

Chief Midori: She must have been smoking like a chimney since you positively reek of it.

Zoi: I haven't taken up smoking, if that's what you're afraid of.

[He goes to his room and puts the rose next to his computer.]

Chief Midori: Pretty rose. Where did you get it?

Zoi: [averting his gaze] Oh, just something I picked up to brighten up my room a little.

Chief Midori: Are you sure you don't want me to take you to a doctor? You're looking a little flushed and haggard.

Zoi: No dad. It's just a virus. The doctor can't do anything.

Chief Midori: How about I make you some chamomile tea. Or some soup. I just pour the can into a cup and put it into the microwave, right?

Zoi: Geez, dad. I'm ok. I don't need any tea or soup. I just need a nap.

Chief Midori: [smiles and musses his hair] You're so low maintenance. How did I get so lucky to have such a good kid?

[Zoi just sits on his bed and stares at his hands without answering.]

Chief Midori: Love you, son.

Zoi: Love you too, dad.

[As soon as his father leaves, Zoi bursts into tears, racked with guilt. If his father had any idea how he's spent the past few hours he'd have a heart attack. He'd been so focused on how Kunzite was behaving like a perfect gentleman that he failed to pay attention to his own bad behavior. He feels like a total hypocrite. He has no right judging Mamoru and Motoki and Neffy when he's worse than the three of them put together.]

[Yet repenting does no good. He already had plans to sneak out again before dawn.]

[So Zoi lies in his bed and cries from pure heartache. He knows the right thing to do would be to call Kunzite and cancel their date, but that doesn't mean he's going to. There is no way he can cancel their date. He already misses him. Zoi pines for Kunzite every second they are apart.]

[He has to see him as soon as he can. Even knowing how easily he might get caught. Even knowing how badly it will hurt his father when he does get caught.]

[He finally understands what Kunzite meant by his heroin analogy. Zoi's turning into an addict.]