Disclaimer: I don't own Ghost Hunt!!! Hehe…

Synemyoa: Hello folks! Waaa! It's been so long since I last updated this story… Haha! I've been busy lately… Sorry! Well, now here is the next chapter… I hope you'll enjoy!

--------

…REALIZATION???

Am I really in love with him? Or do I only think I am… Because he's got everything I'm looking for in a guy?

--------

Masako sat alone there in the SPR living room. No one else was there, surprisingly… Mai was literally dragged out by Madoka to go shopping. Naru couldn't say no to the woman and allowed Mai to leave. Masako just wanted to relax and get away from those people from showbiz. It was fortunate that Naru didn't complain she stopped over. Well, Naru enjoys silence and it's not likely that she'll talk to herself!

"Haa…" she sighed for the nth time.

"At times like this I think I miss the loud miko and monk duo…" she said to herself and heaved another sigh.

Just then… There was a knock on the door. She stood up and opened it, hoping it wasn't a client. Luckily, it was just the priest.

"Konnichiwa, Hara-san!" he said with a smile.

"Ah… Konnichiwa…" she replied timidly, as always.

"Why---"

"You---"

They said at the same time…

"Ah, you can go ahead and say what you want to say Hara-san." The priest said courteously.

"Okay. I just wanted to ask why you are here… Do you have a case for Naru?" she asked.

"No. Lin-san called me and told me to come over. It seems he is worried that something might be bothering you. He noticed you seem drained today and thought it didn't seem like it's because of work." John explained.

"Ahh… Sou ka… That's nice of him to be worried…"

"So… Is it okay if I ask what's wrong? You can always talk to me…"

"Well, I guess its okay. Like I said during the truth or dare… I think you seem the most likely to listen well and give advice out of everyone."

"Thanks… So? What is it?"

"I… I… I am uncertain… Of my feelings… It's like I don't really know what I want. Who I love… Brown-san… In your case, have you ever felt like giving up priesthood? You know… Like feeling that you might fell in love somewhere along the way to someone… What would you do? Have you ever had doubts?"

"Well… I think I kind of understand your situation. Everyone gets scared and have doubts along the way while making decisions in their lives anyway… And feelings are a serious matter. When you talk about my priesthood as an example… Hmm, I guess I did have doubts. I am the only guy sibling in the family. My parents expected me to carry the name and let it go for generations or something… And I've considered the idea that I might fall in love in the future… But I already made a choice. I wanted to be a priest. And until now, my feelings haven't changed. And if the moment does come that I will have to choose between love and God… Maybe, I will choose love. I know God will forgive me for it… I can love God all my life even while sharing a love with another person. But if I let go of that precious person in exchange for priesthood… Such an opportunity to find love will never come again. I know God wouldn't want me to waste it… We only live once after all." (Synemyoa: That was a long speech! Haha! I hope it didn't bore you… These are actually my thoughts spoken by the priest in here. Hehe!)

"Sou desu ne… When you talk about love so deeply like that. I can't help but think that if these feelings I have for Naru are love… Then, perhaps they are too shallow. If I were a nun, I think… I can't give that up just for Naru. As how you implied, and like how others say… Love involves sacrifices sometimes. And I guess that means… I'm not in love with Naru? Right?"

"I can't be the one to tell you or judge your feelings for him. Even if you gave me the details about how you feel and what you think… My opinion will still be different to that of what's truly in your heart. Because you're the only one who can feel it… You need to think about it yourself."

"I guess that's what I have to do… Thank you, Brown-san for listening to me. I somehow feel relieved and the burden lightened."

--------

So which is it really? Am I in love with him? Or is it nothing but make-believe? Those were the questions I couldn't answer a week ago. But after that talk with Brown-san last time… I somehow realized… I really am not in love with Naru. At least I don't feel that I am. I guess I only thought I was. But I've opened my eyes. Those feelings were nothing more than make-believe… Now I wonder. Will I ever feel real love? And would I ever realize sooner once it hits me for real? I may not know the answers now… But someday, I'll know better… I'll find what I'm looking for, in the future that no one in this world holds…