Under the Rabbit Moon
Part II
Recap: Sakura reached her own hands up to her face and ground the heels of her palms over her eyes, hiding them from Hashirama and Madara. "I didn't deserve it. I meant to-ugh. Naruto and Sasuke died because of her but I couldn't help it. I'm sorry I-I'm so-sorry…" Sakura moaned and hunched up in Hashirama's arms. Her shoulders shook with silent sobs.
"You loved her. You don't need to apologize for that," Madara whispered in what he hoped was a soothing voice. "She loved you too, enough to die for you."
Sakura's sobs broke into smaller hiccups that Hashirama cooed away while rubbing circles into her back. He meant down and kissed the crown of her head in front of Madara before whispering in her ear.
"It's going to be okay. We're going to take care of you. We're your family and we love you just as well as she did. We're not going to let you be alone," Hashirama said.
Over her shoulder Madara met Hashirama's eyes, and then swallowed before nodding. "Yeah."
The three of them sat together in silence, interrupted only by the occasional hiccup or cry from Sakura as she exhausted herself on tears in Hashirama's arms. Around them, the fires died out and the bioluminescent moss glowed to light, coloring them all in shades of blue and green.
She felt empty.
She suspected she would when she woke up and remembered her separation from Kaguya. Still, there was a part of her that felt carved out and raw, worse than any bruise or cut. She could heal bruises and cuts. Heartbreak was a different matter. Sakura felt like she lost a family member and a limb all at once.
She felt empty.
When Sakura looked up Hashirama sat across from her on the other side of the fire, tending to it so that the flames didn't diminish. The night was cold without fire. Madara was somewhere in the trees, keeping watch from the safety of the shadows. If something were to stir, attracted by their light, he would be the first to see it. Sakura couldn't see him in the shadows, but sometimes she caught a flash of ruby eyes between the tree branches, but then it was gone before she knew how to react.
She was slower without Kaguya.
Sakura felt some discomfort and adjusted in her bed roll before pushing it all off to stand and face the trees. Hashirama tensed and watched her move, eyes trained on her like magnets.
"Are you alright?" Hashirama asked, looking ready to stand and follow her around.
"I need to…go," Sakura said, frowning when her face flushed.
"It's dangerous, I'll go with you," he said, already halfway around the fire.
"Not like that," Sakura hissed, hands out. "To the bathroom. I need to pee, you can't go with me!"
Hashirama's faced turned just as red as her own. "Bu-but it's dark and you're still so weak from the ordeal. You shouldn't go far."
"I'm not planning on it," Sakura huffed in exasperation. "But I wanna pee in peace without exposing myself to your viewing pleasure, thank you very much."
Her words might as well have petrified. Hashirama stood in place, still as stone.
The first time they had showed signs of coddling, Sakura had excused it. But after a day of travel they were still sticking to her like metal on magnets and she felt too terrible to humor their unintentional condescending. She was far weaker without Kaguya, but she wasn't a child. She would be fine taking five minutes to herself.
Hashirama stayed in place, stunned by her words and too embarrassed to move, so Sakura picked up her feet and forged a path through the brush until she was far away enough for some privacy. She paused and then stared up into the tree tops. She couldn't sense like she once could now that Kaguya was gone, but she knew enough to know when Madara was close by.
"If you are watching any of this, Uchiha, I'll rip out your eyes myself," Sakura hissed up into the tree branches.
A moment later and the crickets began chirping again and she felt safe enough to take care of her business. Once she was done she didn't head back immediately. She turned back towards camp and took a few steps before stopping along her makeshift path. She huffed to herself and squared her shoulders before marching the rest of the way.
Hashirama was beside the fire and so was Madara. Both stood as she rejoined the clearing. Before either could open their mouth Sakura bowed sharply from her hips, cutting off their words.
"I'm sorry," she said. "You are worried for me and have done so much to keep me safe and help me, but I've been cross and short with you even though you don't deserve it. Forgive me, please."
Hashirama was at her side first, easing her out of a bow and into a hug.
"There is nothing to forgive. You've been hurt. You're still mourning, and we somewhat deserve it. Any lady should feel entitled to their privacy."
Madara nodded along. "Hashirama is a pervert," he agreed.
Sakura barked a laugh while the Senju gasped and smacked at Madara's head. The teasing was familiar.
Madara ducked behind Sakura for safety from Hashirama and hugged her around the waist when it looked like she might be pulled away from him. In frustration, Hashirama lowered his arms and huffed. Only when Sakura reached for his hands did his expression lighten.
"Still, thank you. I owe you that much for putting your lives on hold for me. Both of you left when you have an entire village to run."
"You know you're more important than a few days of political power. Izuna and Tobirama will do fine in our absence," Madara said in dismissal.
Sakura raised a single brow. "It's not like you to admit something like that about Tobirama."
Madara might have flushed, but in the dim firelight it was hard to be sure. "I don't care for him personally, but I'll admit he has his own merits. I'm not blind."
"I'll have to thank them myself when I get back," Sakura said, patting Madara's hands around her waist until he let go.
Hashirama spoke, "Seeing you healthy will be thanks enough. They were worried."
"How much did you tell them before you left?" Sakura asked with a frown. She couldn't remember much of anything after she passed out in her kitchen. Kaguya took over and Sakura had been trapped in her own mind for what felt like eons and mere seconds at the same time. She couldn't remember if Tobirama or Izuna had been in the house after her collapse or if she had been taken to where they were. Kaguya had kept Sakura in the dark for all of it.
"They saw you before we left," Madara answered before Hashirama could. "Kaguya even spoke to them, and I think she was trying to be reassuring."
Sakura felt something twinge in her heart. "What did I look like? Did I say anything to either of them."
"Not really," Hashirama admitted with a great sigh. "You weren't able to speak much, but you started to manifest Kaguya's features, such as her hair and horns. It's not anything for you to be worried about though! Izuna wouldn't have minded what you looked like and Tobirama was just worried about your health."
"When we get back," Madara said, "you can speak to them yourself and dismiss any of their fears personally. I'm sure they'll be eager to monopolize your attention."
"Let them," Hashirama added. When Sakura looked up at his face she saw his smile was soft for her, but also almost sad. "I'm sure they wish they could spend more time with you."
"Of course. But the academy is nearly ready for launch and the hospital needs me to oversee the major-"
"You are more important," Madara cut her off. "You've been running off exhausting yourself and exasperating your condition with Kaguya until there was nothing to exasperate. Would it be too much to ask you to rest? Just take some days off."
"I've been gone too long. I have responsibilities to catch up with."
"Family is an important one," Hashirama said plainly.
Sakura chewed on her bottom lip. "I won't push myself past my limits. I know how important it is to rest." She threw up her hands, palms up. "I got it. I'll make sure I rest even more when we get back."
"Good," Hashirama cheered. "Now, why don't we get back into our rolls for the night-except for you Madara. You and your clones are still on duty."
The Uchiha made a sour face. "Don't sound too cheery about it, dense idiot," Madara grumbled.
A moment later Sakura felt the shiver of his chakra masking itself as he became more shadow than man in the tree tops. She tried to scan for him, but forced herself to not bother when she remembered how impossible it would be for her. She didn't have Kaguya anymore. She had never been a sensor, just sensitive. She had feelings and hunches and some familiarity with his chakra, but when Madara wanted to be invisible, he could be a ghost.
"He'll be sour for a bit, but don't worry about him," Hashirama said while gesturing her to the bedroll she had left behind earlier. "Aren't you tired? Today you looked weary."
Sakura didn't want to admit how she was lagging behind the others during the day. They were nothing but kind to her about it, but she knew better. It wasn't because of her injuries or slow recovery. Hashirama and Madara were the gods of the shinobi world. She had struggled to keep up with Naruto and Sasuke, but here she was again, falling behind and watching their backs.
She pretended to not notice how Hashirama stayed up watching her, across the fire in his own roll. His attention was as thick as his concern. It was enough to swim in.
Sakura pulled the covers around her and closed her eyes. In her heart she resolved to resume training as soon as they were back. She would go back to Tsunade's lessons. She would make herself as fast as she once was, and then faster still. She'd catch up with Madara and Hashirama in time. She'd done it before, and she would do it again.
She almost dreamed of a different pair of backs she never did manage to catch up to.
Almost.
The morning came and she was able to wake when Madara did. Hashirama had taken over the night watch and welcomed both of them to a breakfast that was still warm from the fire. Madara complained about the flavor because Hashirama was notorious for embellishing his meat with spices.
"Where did you even get these flavors? We're traveling."
"Of course I would have them when I'm traveling. I could get them anywhere if we were back home. You take stuff you need when you travel."
"You don't need spices when you travel," Madara grumbled.
Hashirama made a face. "The meat is too bland without it."
"It's meat!"
"Look, the only reason I'm not still a vegetarian is because this stuff tastes amazing when you prepare it correctly. We're not in a rush. I want to enjoy my meal."
Madara glared over the meat he tore off the bone with his teeth. "You just wanted to show off," he grumbled around the food in his mouth.
Hashirama didn't rise to the glaring, but instead rolled his eyes and then offered Sakura some more, ignoring her attempts to brush him off. "At least I can. What was the last thing you cooked? Water?"
Madara didn't reply with words, but loudly bit at another thick chunk of meat, digging his teeth straight down to the bone and pulling with a guttural sound. It didn't help that his hair was still a wolf mess around his face so early in the morning. To Sakura he seemed more animal than man.
"What do you think, Sakura?" Hashirama asked.
"It's good. I was hungry," she said.
Her plate was still mostly full, but she assumed that was only because Hashirama kept giving her more whenever a free spot opened up. It was more of his coddling, but she kept herself from being irritated. He was allowed to coddle.
Once they got back, a huge chunk of her time would go into training and getting stronger. Whatever state she was in currently, wasn't her final form. She had seen it hundreds of time before with fantastic ninja who needed to recover after a debilitating injury. She wasn't as strong as she would like to be, but she would get stronger with time…little by little.
She felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. When she glanced up she saw it was because of Madara. He was watching her again. When they talked he seemed normal, but then during quiet times, when they were close enough, she'd feel his gaze only to look up and see his face turned away.
Sakura decided she was full, but so was her plate, so she turned to Madara and lifted it off. The gesture should have been plainly clear, but Madara avoided her eyes and stiffly shook his head.
"I got it," Hashirama said, swooping in to pick up the plate and eat her leftovers. "Let me clean that up."
"You cooked," Sakura protested when Hashirama grabbed the other utensils. She tried to take the plate back, but Hashirama ducked out of her reach with a coy smile.
"I'll be right back," he called back cheerfully, before heading off to wash up their plates in the nearby brook.
He wasn't yet out of sight before Sakura turned towards Madara and reached for his wrist, grabbing him before he could run off. He startled at the contact and face her with a frown.
"What?"
"You're nervous around me. Why?" she demanded.
Sakura didn't waste time. She didn't know how long Hashirama would be gone and she wanted to seize her first chance to talk with Madara privately before they got back. When he was in front of Hashirama he was better about hiding it, but there was something off about Madara.
He avoided her eyes. "You're off it. I'm fine."
"You can't lie to me. I know you better than that. What is it?" Sakura pressed. "What changed?"
"Nothing. It's not like that. I'm fine. You're fine. Che," he tisked, trying to shake her hand off.
Sakura held firm, using a bit of her chakra to keep her fingers around his wrist. It was enough to make him remember how strong she could be while also assuring him that all her skills weren't now gone. She was still a monster of strength when she wanted to be.
"What is it?" There was fear in her heart, blooming brighter with every passing second. "What did I do?"
"Nothing!" Madara snapped, finally turning to face her.
Something in his expression made her hold go slack and he was able to break away. But he only climbed to his feet and backed away before pausing, still within the boundaries of their camp. He paused on the boundary and glanced back over his shoulder before his hands went into his hair, ruffling it further. Sakura watched as he rubbed at his face and paced back and then forth.
"It's nothing," he insisted once more.
"You're a better liar with everyone else, Madara," Sakura said.
"I'm sorry you feel that way."
Sakura opened her mouth to say something more, but then she heard Hashirama. Madara stiffened at the same moment and Sakura was grateful that she wasn't the only one with senses that could only barely register Hashirama's approach.
Hashirama came back, still smiling, and began to pack up without glancing in Madara's direction.
"Come on you two, let's get this place cleaned up so we can get a move on. If you don't mind the detour, we can stop by a little merchant outpost that's not far from here. Maybe there could be some treats worth snacking on during he journey home," said Hashirama.
"We just ate, how are you talking about food so soon?" Madara asked with an undertone of disgust.
Hashirama just laughed.
Sakura didn't say anything more but began to break down her bed roll into its smallest size before sealing it away in one of the spare sealing scrolls. The great thing about being a Senju was they always could be relied upon to have an overabundance of sealing scrolls on their possession. Sakura had assumed that to be a trait acquired through the Uzamaki, but Mito had told her it was actually a shared interest. The Sneju were just more secretive about the sealing skills.
She finished with her area and stood back up to find both males ready to depart. Madara caught her eye and then looked away quickly. He became a flicker and then nothing. Sakura heard him in the trees overhead, but when she looked up to see where he was, he had already moved on, disturbing the foliage above their heads.
"Eager beaver, isn't he?" Hashirama chuckled. When Sakura glanced back she noticed the hand extended her way. Hashirama's smile softened, looking almost hesitant. "Shall we?"
Sakura took his hand, but tugged him back when he tensed to spring up into the trees after Madara.
"He's nervous around me. Did you know?" she asked in a whisper.
Hashirama's smile turned sadder. "Give him time to forgive himself." He tugged her closer and Sakura was forced to right herself as Hashirama launched them onto the first tree branch. His momentum helped her fall into a new rhythm through the treetops just in time for his words to click.
Madara had nothing to apologize for in this world.
But in another world…?
The question burned in her chest ad helped dull her to the pain of her legs stretching with chakra for the first time in a long time. She hadn't run so hard since before Kaguya, but she was beginning to remember the weight of her own body, and how every leap and jump cost her energy she was in desperate lack of.
The confusion in her head was a good distraction.
The were a little over a day away from the village, and with Hashirama's stop at the detour point to buy better food than what they had caught, they ended up needing to spend the night outside of the village while still in the boundary zone for the Land of Fire.
"Because of you we're so far off schedule," Madara accused, glaring sideways at Hashirama. "This wasn't worth your food obsession."
"Don't be like that, I said I was sorry!" Hashirama whined as the sun began to sink behind them. It painted the sky a stunning shade of purple red, like the color that oozed out of a blood orange. Sakura was caught watching the clouds turn different shades of red while Hashirama went on in the background. "I said I'd make up for it, didn't I? So here we are, an Inn, my treat!"
"This place looks barely big enough to be a shack," Madara hissed back.
"It's just like that from the front. All these shops seem like that until you're inside," Hashirama insisted.
"We've been gone too long."
Madara's words caused Hashirama to pout. "Don't lie. You can't say you're not enjoying the time off."
Madara's glare was cutting. "Some of us know what the word responsible means."
Hashirama remained unfazed. Instead, he turned to Sakura and reached for hand, startling her out of the way she watched the sky. "Come on, you an I can get a room then, Sakura, and leave the brooding mother hen to himself."
Madara's eyes flashed red but Hashirama was already pulling Sakura inside the inn, up to the front desk. Hand in hand they looked almost like a couple, even though they were both obviously dressed for travel. Sakura's yukata didn't come down long enough to hide the fact that she wore leggings under it all.
A woman behind the desk looked up from a log book and pushed her cup of tee behind a potted plat to hide it from view before coughing. She inclined her head but didn't speak first, leaving that to Hashirama.
"A room for two please!" Hashirama chirped cheerfully. "My wife and I need a place to spend the night."
"You-" Madara had grabbed Hashirama's shoulder but couldn't turn him around.
"Oh, and I suppose I should request a cot or bedroll for our bodyguard too. You don't have rooms for three, do you? Or maybe two separate rooms."
The woman behind the desk blinked once before looking Madara over, wild eyed and with a head full of wild hair before believing the bodyguard story. "We could arrange a cot, but at this moment, we don't have adjoining rooms available. One of our largest rooms is free, however, if you don't wish to be separated from your protection detail. The cot and privacy screen will be an extra charge."
"Excellent," Hashirama agreed, laying down the heavy chunks of money that would more than pay for their stay. "While you are at it, please send up any extra bedding. I have a terrible back."
Sakura watched as the woman was eager to swipe the money up and deposit into a box out of sight behind the counter. Then she turned to the back wall and opened up a cupboard to produce several rows of hooks. There weren't many, and most of them were empty. Like she had said, none of the open rooms were next to each other.
Hashirama took the key as soon as he could and listened only briefly to the instructions for how to find their room, before he tugged his 'sweet wife' up the stairs after him. Madara followed, close on Sakura's heels, but didn't say anything, though the veins in his neck might have suggested he had something to say.
The room was at the end of the hallway and was far away from the other doors that made Sakura think it was the sort of room that was reserved for those traveling with a little extra coin or men who thought they were important enough to deserve the extra space.
Hashirama was quick enough with the lock in the key that Sakura didn't doubt he was still just as fast with his hand seals. The door opened easily and the trio stepped up into the room, seeing for themselves exactly what the desk clerk had described, minus the cot and privacy screen. There was minimalistic decor to attract the eye as well as a bed at the end of the room that looked enormous enough for more than two people.
Madara pushed into the room and shut the door behind them all before slapping a low grade privacy seal on the seam of the door. He then whirled on Hashirama looking murderous.
"You shouldn't have done that. They're bringing up a cot, remember?" Hashirama sighed.
"What the hell was that?" Madara hissed.
"I wanted a room and you know better than I how important it is to travel with an alibi. The fact that we're not wearing our clan markings does little to help keep us inconspicuous. What are you so angry about. It's not the first time we've had to share a room or even a bed."
Sakura felt her eyebrows raise. "Oh?"
"N-not like that! Don't get any ideas," Madara blustered, fidgeting in place. "This and that are different matters, Hashirama. Don't be dense."
"I'd love to but," Hashirama raised a finger and then pointed to the door. "Housekeeping is coming. Why don't you save that seal for later."
Madara grumbled, hesitating to do what his friend suggested, likely because it was something he had been told to do. Madara hated being instructed to do anything for anyone, but he especially bristled at Hashirama's cheeky attitude.
But there were footsteps outside the door and Madara had to tear off the seat to open the door and let the staff in. Sakura and Hashirama stepped off while the cot was deposited close to the door and a pair of extendable folding screen were set up to give the rest of the room some privacy.
"Thank you, that's just lovely, thank you," Hashirama called.
He saw the help out then closed the door, sealing the three of them in before setting his own silence seal up on the door. Unlike Madara's, his seal glowed green before flashing light to the far corners of the room, protecting each connecting wall and surface from transferring sound.
Madara made a noise of displeasure under his breath that hashirama ignored. The Senju seemed to have an indomitable smile that was more a part of his face than any other feature.
"Very well then, Madara. Do you want to set up your cot for the night now or later?"
"You're not serious," Madara scoffed.
Hashirama hummed, smile still in place.
Madara's lip curled and he whirled back on his heels to sweep his arm out and gesture to the small cot roll that had been provided. "You expect me to leave you two and sleep on that?"
"Yes, that was the plan," Hashirama said, sounding as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
"I'm not leaving you alone with Sakura!"
"Why not? You've been avoiding her all day. You don't care."
Madara went still and Sakura felt in her throat how her breath froze. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up while Hashirama just smiled on.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
Madara's body language had never been subtle, and it was clear he was tense, avoiding eye contact and hiking his shoulders as he turned away from her specifically. It almost looked like he was about to walk out but then the doors started to spin out new curling shoots. Madara whirled on Hashirama but the smile was still there, deceptively innocent.
"We really shouldn't be leaving. It would look bad if the body guard left his charges," said Hashirama.
Madara swiped at a curling branch with his kuni."Quit it, Hashirama. Make this stuff go away."
"It's just a couple of twigs, don't worry about it. I think they help."
Madara swung again. "Dismiss them. You're overreacting."
"Me? I don't think so. I think this is an entirely appropriate reaction to the situation. You don't seem to have your mind made up, which is really disheartening to see. I thought your convictions were stronger than that, but now I see you were just full of empty talk."
"Shut up. You're talking out of your ass."
A curling branch behind Madara thickened and coiled, turning the point of its end in Madara's direction, aimed for his head. Sakura jerked into action, pulling on Hashirama knock him off his feet and disturb his concentration.
Madara noticed the point in time and cut it easily. The branch sliced into pieces as soft as butter.
"That's enough!" Sakura interjected, standing between the two of them. "I'll take the cot. The two of you need to work this out. What the hell is wrong with you two?"
"See what you did, Madara. We're the ones who are supposed to be taking care of Sakura yet you're making her take your lumpy old cot because you're selfish."
"Me? I'm not doing anything."
"You're hurting her."
"No I'm not. Sakura, we can sleep on the floor. You can take the bed. You need the best sleep out of all of us," insisted Madara.
Sakura held her face in her hands and scrunched up the skin around her eyes, hating how small she felt in the face of their arguments. When Naruto and Sai argued she smacked them both and yelled at them until they behaved, but she wasn't that person anymore, and she didn't think she could smack the gods of the shinobi world and get any positive results.
"The two of you shut up," she said, speaking lowly.
Around her the wood stopped growing and the room went silent once more. Sakura raised her face from her hands and faced Madara before reaching for the front knot of her robe, tugging it open to show off the long sleeve gray shirt underneath. Hashirama didn't speak but Madara started to bluster.
"Look at it," Sakura snapped, tugging up the bottom half of her shirt to show off unmarred skin. "Look, damn it."
Madara didn't want to, but he opened one eye from under his messy bangs and glanced her way. Hashirama stayed silent, observing without speaking or interfering.
"Look at it. There's nothing there. There's no mark, there's no scar, there's nothing to make you think I had ever been hurt her, is there?" Sakura felt all her suspicions confirm when she saw Madara's face and the look in his eyes. "That wasn't you," she whispered.
The fight and tension spilled out of Madara and his frame slackened like a balloon that had lost all its air. He barely seemed steady on his feet until Madara came up behind him and clasped his shoulder. The teasing from before easily forgotten.
Madara crossed the distance between them and grabbed at his elbows, staring up under his bangs into his face. She guided one of his hands over the smooth flesh and he nearly pulled away, but she was stronger, so she held him in place. Eventually, his fingers relaxed and spread naturally across the warm skin, fanning out.
"You didn't do anything," she insisted.
"I saw it," Madara whispered. "I saw how you were run through. It was a memory."
"But it wasn't you."
"It explained why you had been tense with me…before…at times. You were remembering that version of me, weren't you? As I grew older you remembered what I did to you in that other life."
Sakura didn't want to lie. That was exactly how it happened. Even if eventually she got over it, there were those times when she would react before she knew any better. It was a reflex that was supposed to help keep her alive. Now it was just hurting her friendships.
"That wasn't you. You are not that man. You would never do something like that to me here. I trust you. I've trusted you long before you knew any of this." She swallowed. "What else did you see?"
"All of it," Hashirama answered before Madara could. He glanced over Madara's shoulder to Sakura. "You won't go back to that world, will you?"
Sakura pulled back and Madara's hand fell away from her stomach. "I couldn't even if I wanted to. But there is nothing but death left to greet me if I should try and return. No, my home is here."
Hashirama grinned, and it was different from his smiles. "So, where does that mean we'll sleep?"
Madara's ears turned red at the tips, but he didn't look away this time. "Stupid question, there's enough room for three."
AN:Ta da!
There was no Izuna or Tobirama in this chapter, but I'm sure they're doing just fine. It's been about a week since Madara and Tobirama took off with Sakura, thanks to Hashirama dragging his heels and insisting they stop to shop, rest, and just chill. (Hint:He likes being out with Sakura.) And like I promised, there was some drama, but also some fluff because shit can hit the fan later when they get back to the village. I finally got to the bed sharing scene I've been dying to write.
Gasp, there's only one bed? What ever shall we do?
It has been a while, hasn't it? I'm not going to lie, it's been just as busy as you would expect around the holidays, but I'm doing better and spending more time with family and friends and doing a lot of social healing, whatever that means? I did take a short break from this to write a holiday piece called Sugarplum that I'm super proud of. I've also been slowly releasing chapters to this high fantasy Witcher/LOTR styled AU called A Confluence of Stars with Sniper!Sakura and lots of magic. It's real easy to get me distracted with magic stories. I have a deep love for those AUs.
Thank you for being patient and waiting and letting me know you're still reading! You guys are the best!
Please review and let me know what you thought please!