Rating: M

Characters: Leroy Jethro Gibbs, Tony DiNozzo, Tim McGee, Abby Sciuto, Ducky Mallard, Jimmy Palmer, Ziva David, Leon Vance, OMC, OFC

Pairings: Gibbs/Tony

Warnings: Rape/non-con, torture, violence, trauma, angst, slash, swearing, mild Ziva bashing (She behaved horribly towards Tony at the end of season 6. I never liked her after that.)

Spoilers: Parts of the end of season 6 and the beginning of season 7

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, I just like to play with them.

NCISNCISNCISNCISNCIS

Tony sighed contentedly, waking to the feel of Jethro's fingers gently working their way through his hair.

Humming, he smiled at the touch. Jethro was the best! Even when Tony was Big – as he was at this moment – if he had a bad dream and felt scared, Jethro would always let him come out and snuggle. Somehow, Jethro had a way of chasing Tony's nightmares away, and calming the chaos in his mind and heart.

Shifting in Jethro's lap, Tony rested a hand against the older man's chest.

"Hey," Tony whispered, voice raspy with sleep, staring up, bleary eyed, at Jethro.

"Hello, sweetheart," Jethro cooed, lightly brushing Tony's cheek. "We've got a visitor."

Following Jethro's gaze, Tony tilted his head back to glance at their guest, and his face suddenly brightened. "Tim!" he exclaimed, sitting up. "What are you doing here so late?"

Standing up from the easy chair, Tim made his way over to the couch and took a seat beside Tony. "Just checking in to see how you're feeling," he answered, giving his best friend a pat on the knee. "Last time I saw you, you were pretty sick."

"I feel mostly better. But sometimes I have coughing," Tony said, grabbing the edge of his blankie and bunching it in his fists.

"Well, when that cough clears up…" Tim exchanged a meaningful look with Jethro. "I was hoping I could take you out for ice cream."

"Take me out…" Tony blinked, as his heart suddenly seemed to plummet into the pit of his stomach; his emotions now a confused bundle of love, gratitude and fear.

"Yeah. This new place opened, not far from my apartment. They make their own ice cream, and top it with homemade syrups. I remembered how happy you were eating ice cream at Ducky's, and thought you might like to try it out with me."

"I…I like ice cream, but…" Tony pulled the blankie up to his neck, burying his face in his balled up fists.

"Tony?" Tim's concerned voice called to him. "What's wrong, buddy?"

Tony slowly peered up at Tim, feeling a little ashamed of himself, and wishing he could better control his fears.

"I'm scared to be…scared….scared to go out aaa-and see people," Tony confessed between strained breaths and hiccups. "What if people laugh at me. I know I'm n-not normal. Even when I try and be Big, I'm not right in my brain."

It was then that Tony felt the familiar comfort of Jethro's arm wrapping around him and scooping him up into his lap. Resting his head against Jethro's chest, Tony took comfort in the other man's heartbeat, and the rise and fall of his chest with each breath.

They stayed like this for several minutes; Tony held in Jethro's lap, peering up from the blanket at Tim's reassuring eyes. Slowly, Tony felt himself begin to calm.

"Baby boy," Jethro whispered, kissing the top of Tony's head. "You can't go through life being afraid people are gonna laugh at you."

"But I can't even eat without making a mess. Even when I'm Big," Tony whined pitifully. "And what if I regress while we're out? I don't think –"

"Tony." Tim cut Tony off, dabbing at his tears with a tissue he'd gotten from a box on the end table. "I'll be with you the whole time. You don't need to be scared."

Tony sniffled, blinking up at his friend. "You're not embarrassed by me?"

"Of course I'm not," Tim promised, bringing himself in to hug Tony. "You are who you are. And I love who you are."

Tony hummed happily, held in the arms of his two favorite people in the world. Somehow, despite his fears, he knew they would never let anything bad happen to him.

Trying to push back the doubts in his mind, Tony reminded himself that he would be safe.

"Okay." Tony nodded slowly. "I'll go. Thank you for inviting me."

"Sure thing," Tim said softly, smiling at his friend. Giving Tony one last squeeze before letting go of the hug, he then stood, grabbing his jacket off of the easy chair.

"I'll see you on Saturday, Tony."

"Okay," Tony chirped happily, snuggling deeper into Jethro's hold.

"Thanks for stopping by, McGee," Jethro said, nodding his appreciation.

"My pleasure. Goodnight, Gibbs."

"No!" Tony suddenly protested, startled at his own outburst. And as Jethro and Tim turned surprised eyes to him, he worried he might have angered them.

But there was something in their interactions that had always made Tony uncomfortable. Ever since his memories started to return. For a long time, he couldn't quite put his finger on it. In fact, it was only at this moment that Tony realized what had been bothering him.

"What's wrong,Tony?" Jethro asked, pulling back from their embrace to stare into Tony's watery green eyes.

"It's stupid," Tony mumbled, shaking his head.

"Hey." Jethro tapped Tony under the chin, causing the younger man to look up and meet his gaze. "If it's important to you, it's not stupid."

"Yeah," Tim agreed, taking a seat in the easy chair. "What's going on?"

Tony looked down again, rubbing his blanketed fists together. "When we…I remember when we worked together, we did the last name thing. You called me 'DiNozzo', and I called you 'Gibbs' and 'McGee.' But you're 'Jethro' – or 'Daddy' – and 'Tim' to me now. I'm not gonna call you by your last names anymore, and I don't like when you do it, either. It makes me think of before, and that makes me sad."

The room went quiet for a minute, and with each silent second, Tony's anxiety grew. Had he spoken out of turn? Did he really have any right to dictate their speech anyway? But then, he hadn't really ordered them to change the way they addressed each other. He simply said how it made him feel. That was okay. Right?

"Well, we don't work together anymore. Guess we don't need to be so formal," Jethro finally said, immediately putting Tony's mind at ease."

"That's true," Tim nodded thoughtfully. "We're closer than that now."

"Yeah! We're a family!" Tony exclaimed, relieved at their reactions. Feeling very little, and very loved.

"We sure are, Tony,"Gibbs chuckled, once again kissing the top of Tony's head. "Thank you for helping us realize this."