Disclaimer - All rights belong to Teletoon, Cartoon Network, and the creators of TDI. No profit is being made in the making of the fanfiction. This alternate-universe episode of TDI contains stunts performed by written teens. If I find out you are trying these stunts at home, I will come over there and kick your butt.

The Kobold Necromancer's Notes - If you must know what caused the very long delay, I will tell you right now: I have no excuse. You can all point at me now and declare what a jerk I am. That is fair.

Also, new poll! But I'm sure that can wait for you, because we have a new chapter for you at long, long, excruciatingly long last! Huzzah!

...

Chapter 38 - Monsters Bigger Than Chris' Ego! … Barely.

...

...

...

(Maclean Stadium)

"The very ground would tremble at the fury of the being. Disaster ravages the city, buildings crumble, glass spraying from shattered windows and busted lampposts. Trees either snap like twigs or are incinerated in a horrific image of life itself being extinguished during a cruel and violent era that could have been averted, but no! You had to draw the beast from its lair, and upset it to the point where it wouldn't stop until every person, every soul, has been crushed or roasted to the point of no recognition."

"… That's nice and everything, Katie, but if you wanted to keep the cherry for your ice cream, you have to only say so."

"Okay!"

Katie cheerfully plucked the fruit from her bowl of ice cream and ate it. Courtney looked down at her bowl, now without a cherry because she scarfed it down eagerly, looked back up at the sweet girl. "I cannot understand still, why you sounded ready to tear me apart when you snuck back in the stadium, but you're now peacefully serving me ice cream."

"Simple, ice cream makes everything better."

"What about the economy?"

"Buy more ice cream, there's a stimulus for you."

Courtney tapped her ice cream, then sighed again. "Look, are we going to talk about your issue with me, then?"

"It's not my issue with you, it's your issue with me," Katie said, narrowing her eyes. "And your desire to rip my soul from my heart with hate-tipped claws, your dastardly method of wrenching my boyfriend's emotions in a medieval torture rack-"

"Stop that!"

"Sorry. I used to rant a lot when upset, and ever since I started dating Noah, my vocabulary has become, like, real good."

The CIT raised an eyebrow. "Very well. So, what do you want me to say?"

"Why do you hate me so much? I don't recall doing anything to you."

"It's…," Courtney paused to taste some of her ice cream, "… complicated."

"I can cope with that."

Unable to resist this olive branch with ice cream, the CIT took a deep breath. "I guess it cannot be too bad," she thought to herself, "I'm sure there are a lot of places I'd rather not be, and people I wouldn't want to be talk to."

(Panicky Mob, Team 1 - Anita, Cody, Eva.)

"And another thing, you saggy bimbo," Eva shouted at Anita, poking her in the chest, "I don't appreciate how you always are speaking out during the challenges! You're just trying to get attention to myself!"

"Oh, I'm the one trying to get attention to myself?" Anita fired back. "Who roars and screams whenever she's upset? Do you always come on maximum volume?"

"You don't want to see me when I'm at maximum volume, bimbo."

"No one does, she-male."

" 'She-male'?"

"Could we please not argue?" Cody whimpered, looking between the two. He nervously tapped his fingers together, and bit his bottom lip as he looked behind him. He could see and hear panicking civilians, and saw a car being thrown through the air and crash into a fifth floor window; of course, the annoying chirp of door locks could be heard, as it is almost obligated for cars to make annoying sounds.

"You're just lucky you cannot feel pain in this virtual reality simulator, skank," Eva shouted, poking Anita again. "Because since you can't, there's no point to me kicking your flabby butt!"

"Right, because that's your answer to everything, she-male! You're like a rabid boxer whose response to everything is a punch to the face!"

"Call me that one more time, and I'll be tempted."

"Try it, she-male!"

Cody gripped his head as he tried to shake away the headache. He wasn't feeling pain due to the simulation, just was feeling dizzy and confused. It didn't help that the car from the fifth floor had fallen out and crashed upside-down on the sidewalk, setting off its car alarm. Finally, the noise got to him.

"Will you both calm down?" he declared. "Jeez, we're trying to survive being eaten by a giant centipede here! Focus! Now, what were you arguing about?"

It took Eva and Anita a couple seconds to try and remember just what had set them off. The fitness buff remembered first, and said, "I think bimbo here wanted us to turn left."

"She-male wanted us to go right."

"Why can't we just go down the center, if we cannot agree?"

Anita nodded, "Yeah, that's a good idea," while Eva glared at her and snarled.

"Lousy kiss-up."

"Maybe if you once tried being a team player, you wouldn't get so ticked off at everything and everyone!"

"Why you!"

"I would!"

"Would you!"

Anita and Eva were up in each other's faces, and didn't see Cody leaping up and down near them, frantically waving his arms. He was trying to warn them about something with far too many legs for its own good approaching them, but he was too late. The giant centipede scarfed them up with incredible speed, and let out a satisfied belch. Panicking citizens paused to wave the smell away from their mouth, and then were eaten too (oh, the irony).

Outside of the virtual reality world, the three were disconnected. Anita let out a frustrated sigh, then shivered when she heard knuckles cracking.

"You're gonna pay for that, bimbo," Eva snarled.

"Oh sure, beat the hell out of me," Anita snapped. "That'll show everyone what a team player you are!"

"You have no room to talk! What have you ever done to help your team?"

"More than you, you-"

"Enough, both of you," Cody shouted, hands over his ears. "Can't you get along for five seconds? We just got eliminated, and we'd better hope our team pulls through! Just please, try to be nice!"

He walked off, sighing heavily. Anita and Eva exchanged glances, then sulked away from each other.

(Janitor's Closet - Fancy like your nostrils.)

Anita - *looks miserable* "I really let my temper get the best of me there. I hate being catty, but people can really set me off when they push my buttons. Even I don't get myself, I don't know where 'she-male' came from, but all I know is that I blew things with Cody today."

Eva - "Didn't score any points there, with anyone. This whole day sucks. It is times like this I wish I could smack someone with a lead pipe…" *She blinks and then taps her chin.* "Okay… maybe someone was right when they said I need to cool down a little… but don't tell her I said that, or I'll kill both of you."

Cody - "Okay, I lost my temper there, I'll admit it. But see, there's this thing about being in a love triangle that makes things… complicated… see, it's like this…"

*He makes a bunch of weird hand gestures that I don't think any of you will get, because we don't either.*

"… And see, when things go around like that, it makes me tick, you know. Sometimes I wish if everything had been easier if I had just gone out with Gwen in the first place. But no, I guess Trent's the better man there, and I have to pick between a hot Olympian or a bombshell gamer; life can be so frustrating."

Courtney - *She is eating ice cream from her bowl still.* "Oh, I'm sorry, I don't have anything to say. Just had to get away from Katie for a minute, because she's on another of her rants."

Katie - "… and when the heavens and hells crash against the Earth, bad stuff will happen! … Whoa, how'd I get here?" *She looks at the bowl she has in her hands.* "Jeepers, my ice cream is gone, I must have ate it all! I'll have to hurry back to the cafeteria, talk to Courtney for real now."

(Hysteric Crowd, Team 5 - Arthur, Clive, Yoshi.)

"Darn it, darn it, darn it," Clive was shouting as they ran down the back alleys. "Bad word, very bad words!"

"What kind of swearing is that?" Arthur asked. "We're running from a *censored*, giant duck!"

"I think it was a platypus," Yoshi corrected.

"You an expert? Do they eat stuff like that in Japan?"

"… I'm going to ignore that."

Clive panted in desperation, and then almost ran into a wall. He looked up at the top, and noticed barb wire circled the top. "Oh very bad word," the emo shouted, "we're blocked off!"

Arthur turned away and started to head the other way, but stopped as well. "Damn it, the other alley is blocked too! Guess we'll have to wait until the giant duck passes by-"

The ground shook, and a large, wet roar echoed around the city. The vibrations of a building being destroyed by the rampaging not-duck-but-platypus could be felt where they were. Yoshi steadied himself first and noticed the fire escape ladder.

"Time to improvise," he said as he leapt from a trash can and grabbed the bottom rung to pull it down. "Let's get to the roofs, and leap from each to escape as far as we can!"

"You can really think on your feet," Arthur said. "Experience with Godzilla and all?"

"I'm going to ignore that too!"

Clive raised an eyebrow and looked over at Arthur. "He's rather generous. Shame there aren't more people like that on this pathetic planet."

"You mean hair-trigger, sword-carrying warriors?"

"Yep."

"I agree. Now, let's get going!"

The three climbed to the roof, and leapt to the next building. It was a working strategy until the platypus slowly turned towards them. Narrowing its beady but cute eyes, it started rampaging towards them, swatting buildings and trees out of its way.

"Oh, very very bad word," Clive shouted. "The platypus of death is coming after us… for our deaths!"

"How could it possibly know we're the competitors among all the people?" Arthur shouted. "Darn hacks!"

"Time for deathly, dying in the most deathly manner!"

"Look, knock that off, emo boy!"

Yoshi skidded to a halt, and turned around. "Go on, you two! Climb down the fire escape on this building, I'll hold him back!"

"You're crazy! All you have is a sword!"

The warrior teen scoffed. "And do you have a better idea to stop a giant rampaging platypus from coming at you two? Get out of the city, I want our leader to survive this!"

Arthur paused, then pat Yoshi's shoulder. "Good luck, dude. I'll burn a candle on one of those floaty things for you, or whatever the tradition is."

"You know, you're very lucky I'm feeling noble today. Get out of here before I change my mind!"

"Come on, you foolish death-tempter," Clive shouted, grabbing Arthur's jacket and pulling him towards the fire escape.

Yoshi unsheathed his sword, and glared at the approaching mammal (yes they are, look it up). They stared at each other for a couple seconds, and then bowed respectively (no, they don't bow, don't look that up). Yoshi let out a battle cry, the giant platypus let out a battle quack (I don't know if they do or not, don't judge me), and then they attacked.

The warrior teen leapt off the building, swinging his sword. He cut into the giant beast's chest, while its first swing at the boy missed. As Yoshi slashed again, shouting, "For my homeland, for Japan," the beast missed its second swing. The third swing was actually a kick, smashing the warrior against the building and crushing it under the webbed foot. The building shook violently, which caused the two fleeing down the fire escape to be thrown off their feet.

Clive and Arthur both swore in their respective manner as the building was knocked over, and pitched over the side. The terrible crashing noise echoed across the city. The platypus gave a small salute in honor of its fallen opponent, and then trudged off to smash through more buildings.

Arthur recovered slowly, pulling himself up and coughing amid the dust. "Holy crap," he muttered, "that was awful… still alive though. Hey, emo boy? Emo! Clive, where are you?"

He looked around, trying to find where his lost teammate was. When the dust felt too thick for his lungs, he ran out, coughing and hacking, then crashed into someone.

"Well well, if it ain't our beloved leader," the someone said. "Are you losing already?"

"You look like hell, dude, did that building fall on you? Awesome stuff."

Arthur looked at who was holding him, and let out a groan. "Oh great, you two? Just peachy."

Valerie and Colin exchanged glances. "He doesn't seem happy to see us," Valerie said, "considering he's in a bad state."

"I'd be glad to be pushed against your rack, to be honest."

(Janitor's Closet - Cool like your earlobes.)

Valerie - "There are times when I really, really want to kick Colin in the groin. But what's the point if there's no pain in a virtual game?"

Clive - "Deathly dying death is the only salivation we can get! Or… something, I dunno. Bad word, I'm so confused."

Yoshi - "Never thought my greatest challenge would be a fifty-foot platypus… egg-laying mammal with a quill or whatever. Signing up for this show has been quite weird, but unusually satisfying."

Arthur - "Yeah, I was kind of hard on Yoshi, but I figured he fights his best when annoyed; he does always seem to kick Zach's ass whenever they do fight."

(Panicky Mob, Team 2 - Bridgette, Leshawna.)

"Run, run, run! Run your skinny butt off, Bridgette!"

"I'm running, Leshawna! Hard to run anymore than I already am!"

The two girls were heading down the street, pushing their way through the terrified civilians; however, to be honest, Leshawna did most of the pushing. Bridgette wondered if she was like this at school if in a hurry for class too. After running for a short while, they hid behind a building and caught their breath.

"Never knew hiding could be so tiresome," Leshawna admitted. "If this were real, it'd almost be a good exercise, running from that bug!"

"Yeah, never did like those giant bugs… or arthropod, or whatever Harold called it. I don't think it was anthromorphic, was it arthropod?" Bridgette wiped her forehead, and then noticed Leshawna was looking at her. "Um, what? Everything okay?"

Leshawna smiled and crossed her arms as she caught her breath. "You like him, don't you?"

"What? No! I mean, yes! I mean," Bridgette stammered, shaking her head and waving her hands, almost like some poorly choreographed dance. "What I mean is… why have people been accusing me of liking Harold since this season started?"

"I dunno, guess we're all paranoid or something, sugar."

"But why? It's not like this show is ripe with cheaters…"

"Comes with the territory," she replied, smiling. "Reality show, competition-"

"You're one of my best friends, Leshawna!"

"And I haven't accused you of anything, sugar, why are you being so defensive?"

Bridgette stopped, and then scratched the back of her head. "I… have no idea, really."

"I just asked because I wanted you to do something for me-"

The ground shook horribly again, including the building they were leaning against. They felt the structure weaken, the moans of it collapsing, and started forward. Bridgette saw it start to lean towards them, and then very suddenly collapse in their direction. She used all her strength to shove Leshawna. The sister stumbled forward and hit the ground, out of range of the collapsing structure.

"Ow, son of a," she started to say, then looked around. "Bridgette! Girlfriend, where'd you go? Bridgette!"

She called out to her several times, and saw the rubble of the structure. As she headed for it, she saw an arm lifelessly sticking out from behind the debris, an arm wrapped in a blue hoodie's sleeve.

"Oh, Bridgie," Leshawna whimpered, covering her mouth. "Why? Why'd you end your virtual life to save my own digital existence? That chokes me up…"

Leshawna let out a heavy sigh, then saw a gigantic, ugly head of a centipede rise up at the side of the rubble. The head darted down to eat the civilians that weren't crushed, and then saw Leshawna. It made a hungry noise and nodded its head approvingly.

"Oh! Oh no, you didn't," Leshawna shouted in fury. "You did not just look at me and think of how big of a meal I'd be!" She rolled up her sleeves and shouted, "That's it, this may be my digital end, but I'm going down fighting!"

"RUN, LESHAWNA!"

Leshawna and the centipede looked to the side, only to see Xander come speeding by on a motorcycle. As he passed by the giant arthropod, he pulled out an uzi and let fire at the creature's face. It reeled back and shook off the pain, as Justin and Heather ran to Leshawna's side.

"We have to go," Justin said, "now! Big, bad, very un-handsome bug is going to eat us if we don't hurry!"

"Let me go, I'm giving it a piece of my mind! It killed Harold and Bridgette-"

"And you're next if you don't hurry," Heather snapped. "C'mon, we're using all the stuff we found to save you, let's go, sister!"

Leshawna winced, then heard a terrible scraping sound. The centipede attacked Xander, hitting him on the side and sending him flying. The motorcycle was impaled on its pincer, and it tried to shake it off. The rebel lay where he landed, barely moving. Leshawna shrugged off Justin and Heather, hurrying to Xander's side and lifting him up.

"C'mon, babe, I'm not losing you to that freak," she snapped at the dazed rebel. "I still owe you for getting us on that cruise reward!"

"U nufgr vw oluews qurg tiy," was his mumbling reply.

(Janitor's Closet - Nice like your pants.)

Bridgette - "It's amazing how paranoid I've become. I mean, I think of Harold as a friend, only as that! Why is it that part of me doesn't even believe in… me?"

Leshawna - "I think we all just get a little suspicious whenever boy and girl interact, you know? I actually wanted to ask Bridgette something else, and she got all worried. Silly suspicious surfer girl, what's she got to worry about?"

Harold - *He is reading something doodled on the wall.* "What's 'Bridgold'? And who wrote this?"

Crystal - *She hums as she writes down some more of her favorite fanon pairings. When there is a knock on the door, she panics and sticks the post-it to the wall then runs out.* "Coming out, sorry! Just wanted to leave a note!"

Xander - *He looks at a post-it note and sees X+C in a heart.* "Very cute, Crystal. I knew I could reach that cute British girl soon enough… but who's Bridgold?"

(Hysteric Crowd, Team 3 - Beth, Carol, Lindsay.)

"So where did Justin take you for your first date?" Lindsay asked Beth, clapping her hands anxiously.

"He actually visited me on our farm! He was nervous to be around pigs at first, but he really get into them!"

"Did he like Big Britney?"

"Big Bertha, Lindsay, and yes, he loved him!"

"That's great! Tyler liked my doggie, which really was a good sign, don't you think?"

They both were surprised when they heard a bitter scoff. Carol stared down at the ground and kicked some trash out of her way. "You two bragging about your boyfriends," she muttered. "It's like rubbing it in."

"We weren't mocking you, Christmas," Lindsay assured her.

"My name is Carol, Christmas is my last name."

"Your name is… Carol Christmas."

"Yes, and I don't suppose I'll ever change the last name. Or hyphenate it, whatever. Guess that'll make it easier when I'm fighting crooks on the street, won't have anyone worrying about me at home."

"You'll find someone," Beth tried to assure her. "I mean, there's someone for everyone!"

"I don't want someone who's for everyone," Carol cried out, gripping her headband and wailing. "That's too much to share!"

As the two girls tried to calm down the overreacting girl, they approached the bridge exiting the city. When they realized, those not depressed let out a cheer.

"We made it out, we're safe," Beth cheered.

"We won't be stomped on by a 'platy-fuss,'" Lindsay agreed, then stammered, "Um, or is it 'fatty-cuss?' Or 'blabber-tush'?"

"Oh, who cares?" Carol grumbled. "Running away, that's sure to impress people. This sucks, life sucks, I think I might join Clive in emo land."

Beth and Lindsay tried to persuade her not to do that (and Beth had to explain to Lindsay who Clive was), the three girls walked onto the bridge. Carol waved at a couple soldiers who were setting up equipment at the start of the bridge.

"Are those survivors?" one soldier asked the other.

"Yes. We should let them pass before we demolish this bridge."

"I have to ask why we're doing this?"

"Because we don't want the monster to escape the city. Therefore, we are cutting off its path to the mainland."

"But it's a freaking platypus, it can swim! This is a terrible random scenario generation!"

"Hey, don't look at me, I'm just a random NPC, setting up dynamite at the bridge!"

"Oh, thank you for breaking the forth wall," the soldier declared, face-palming. "Honestly, can't you just do the job without complaining? At least we're not the cannon-fodder known as the civilians, so let's just blow up the bridge!"

Carol overheard this, and glanced at the explosives set up around the edge of the bridge. She shrugged, and muttered, "Why would you use dynamite? This is the twentieth century, break out the C-4!"

(Janitor's Closet - Interesting like your eyebrows.)

Lindsay - "I think Singalong was overreacting and being kind of catty there, so upset over not having a boyfriend. Why, all I did was talk about how sweet Tyler was, how much attention he gives me, how he makes me feel so special and the luckiest girl in the world…"

*She pauses, then bites her lip.* "Whoa… maybe I did overdo it."

Beth - "Justin really did like the pigs I live with on my farm! I thought he would hate them, because he likes beautiful things and most don't like pigs, but he did!"

Justin - "I know that Beth loves her pigs, and yeah, they're okay for fat animals. But hey, rolling in the mud does wonders on the pores, so if that's how she wants to spend her dates…" *He wiggles his sexy eyebrows.*

Carol - *sulking quite bitterly* "Everyone has to find love except me…" *She glances at the post-it note, and then wails loudly.* "Whoever X and C are, I know C isn't me! Argh! And who the hell is Bridgold!"

…

Beth - *She enters to see Carol sobbing and pounding the wall of the janitor's closet. Taking sympathy for her, she rubs her shoulders.* "There there, Carol. If I can get a boyfriend, so can you!"

Carol - "Yeah, well, you're lucky, you're so tall!"

Beth - "What? Oh, yeah, I am taller than you, and I always thought I was the shortest girl I knew!" *Carol lets out another sob, and Beth hugs her, apologizing profusely.*

(Panicky Mob, Team 3 - Crystal, Sadie, Zachary.)

"Bloody hell, down here," Crystal shouted. She pointed for the subway entrance, and grabbed Sadie's hand; however, it wasn't Sadie, just some random civilian. "Oh! Sorry, nameless NPC," she shouted as she shoved the random person away from her.

Zachary had already grabbed Sadie's hand and pulled her close to him. "Whatever happens, Sadie, don't leave my side!"

"Aw, you really care?"

"Well of course I care, why else would I hold your hand?"

As Sadie giggled and blushed, Crystal turned to look back at them. "Will you move? We're all brown bread if you lolly-gag!"

Both of them stared at her. "What?"

"We'll be dead!"

They headed down into the subway, where people were frantically pushing other people away to get ahead of people who were shoving other people to the side; needless to say, it was a rather pushy situation. Crystal was more gentle about it, as much as she could be. She was karate-chopping and kicking people in the way, shouting, "Sorry, digital person! My apologies, random NPC! Look, I know you guys aren't real, could you move for those who are trying not to be brown bread, you soulless gits?"

Zachary and Sadie exchanged glances, and she muttered, "See, this is why I don't take the subway. People can be so rude, and that's even when there isn't a giant monster tearing up the place."

"Not to mention all the racists."

"Oh yeah, people are racing all the time, it's very irritating."

As Zachary tried to explain himself, Crystal studied the map of the city that was provided. "According to this," she mused, "the subway arriving now will take us to a stop near one of the bridges! Bloody brilliant!"

"I'm talking about people who make unfair discriminations, Sadie."

"Oh, I know, like this one guy on my school bus, he'd give his seat for Katie but not me! What's up with that? I mean, Katie is the prettiest girl I know-"

"Are you two even listening?" Crystal barked, hands on her hips. "Our ride will be here very soon, and you're arguing about meaningless dribble!"

"Crystal, do you always have to be so British?" Zachary asked.

"Yeah, you're kind of overdoing it," Sadie added.

"I am not," she sulked, looking away. "And anyway, I was told it's not possible to overdo British, whatever that means."

Before they could say or complain or British anymore, the rumble of the approaching ride could be heard. Crystal waved for them to come up to the line, where she was already starting to beat down people clamoring to the edge.

"You're very brutal," Sadie pointed out.

"I learned karate for self-defense, of course; I never use it for stealing a place in line, but this is different."

"That's sweet and all, but I do like a girl who's soft and sweet," Zachary said, glancing at Sadie. She giggled and flushed again, while Crystal rolled her eyes.

"Just get ready to fight for a place at the front when the car arrives, and we'll be fine."

The three looked down the tunnel where the rumble was coming from. Crystal blinked as she heard some scraping, and then the hairs on the back of her neck stood up. "Oh golly Molly," she whimpered, then added at the top of her lungs, "BLOODY RUN!"

"What?" Zachary shouted back, looking back at her as she ran away. "Why are you saying that?"

He received his answer as the giant centipede came crawling out of the tunnel, and immediately besieged the crowd at the front of the line. Sadie screamed and pulled Zachary's hand, trying to get him to safety, as bloodcurdling shrieks deafened them all.

Crystal couldn't hear anything except hysteric shrieks that made her ears ring. She was now kicking, elbowing, and chopping people nonstop, shouting, "Sorry," "Excuse me, miss," and "Get the bleeding hell out of my way, you're only extras, yes I know that's rude to say but I'm in a bit of a sodding hurry here!"

She could hear the giant centipede munching down people nonstop behind her, and saw a few limbs fly over her head in the frenzy. The people running alongside her were disappearing one by one as the centipede reached out to snatch more people, and soon she was the only one running away to the exit. She dashed up the side, the giant centipede hitting the wall. The ground shook from the impact, throwing her off her pace but not enough to make her fall. Showered by bits of stone, she managed to get to the top.

Panting and whimpering, she looked back down the stairs to the subway, but the centipede had not followed her. Crystal didn't have time to sigh in relief, as she realized Zachary and Sadie were not with her. She cried out in horror, and crossed her fingers in hopes they had made it out all right.

"I was so selfish," she mumbled as she walked forward. "I hope they aren't too mad at me!"

(Janitor's Closet - Handsome like your belly button.)

Zachary - "Racist British romantic! And what the heck is with these notes?" *He grabs one and rolls his eyes.* "Fans and their stupid shipping, honestly. Although… I could use this for Stupid… I mean Sadie!"

Sadie - *She is glancing at the notes, and giggles when she reads one.* "Aw, it's a Zed and an S in a heart! That has to be Zachary! He's so sweet, and he left me several notes! … Heehee, he's such a romantic, I can tell! But who's Bridgold?"

…

Beth and Crystal - Beth - "I think these notes are confusing a lot of people. Lindsay wanted to make sure the L&T was her and Tyler, not Leshawna and Trent."

Crystal - "Oh my! I guess I should be more specific! I don't even ship Letrenta!"

Beth - "Hmm, I never gave much thought about that. By the way, who's Bridgold?"

Crystal - "Umm, heh heh… shouldn't that be obvious?"

Beth - *obviously confused* "Belinda and Cody?"

(Hysteric Crowd, Team 6 - Ezekiel, Gwen.)

Things were not looking good for the Hysteric Crowd, as they were trapped in the middle of a hysteric crowd.

"Stupid hysteric croo'd," Ezekiel cursed. "Honestly, they're moo'r dangerous than that platypus!"

"They're going to trample us at this rate," Gwen shouted. "Stay close to me, don't let them knock you over!"

The sound and rumble of approaching, giant, webbed feet was coming in their direction, so the panicking mob (no, not the other team) were in a state of primal fear. Ezekiel winced as people kept slamming against him, knocking him around; Gwen reached out and grabbed his wrist.

"Don't let go," she shouted. "Don't let the idiots push you around-"

She was hit in the back of her knee, knocking her off-balance. Her grip on Ezekiel weakened, and he was knocked from her grasp. When she managed to grab someone and pull herself up, she saw the prairie boy fall over. She cried out, but was pulled away as her teammate was trampled by the crowd.

The screaming mob was still pushing forward, and nearly swallowed up another team of the contestants. DJ shielded Rodney and Tyler, knocking away people heading for them. The gentle giant was shouting, "Excuse me," "Sorry, mister," and "Will you foolish people stop panicking? The platypus isn't head for us anymore-"

A building nearby was smashed from the other side, sending it crashing down on part of the anxious agitated. Gwen screamed out, and her raspy voice alerted her teammates.

"That's Gwen," Tyler shouted. "I recognize that scream anywhere!"

"That sounds wrong, dude," DJ hollered.

"What do you mean?" Rodney asked, confused and scared. "What's wrong? Do we need to save Gwen?"

DJ was already pushing his way forward, knocking away pointless peeps. "Gwen! Hurry! Get over here!"

The platypus roared again, shoving over another building. More of the crying crash of people were crushed under metal and debris. Gwen waved her pale arms about, calling out to DJ. Her large friend was carrying Rodney under one arm, Tyler right behind him.

"This is worse than the last major game I went to," Tyler said. "People were beating each other with cracker jacks and their empty drinks, trying to shove caps down peoples' throats, and it wasn't even halftime yet!"

DJ finally managed to reach Gwen, and cried out, "We gotta get out of here!"

Another build was smashed, right down towards them and the last section of the hysterical hooligans. DJ shrieked louder than any of them and held Rodney tight to him ("Wow, you can really yell, D-hurk!"), turning away from the falling building. Gwen froze in horror, and then someone tackled her, knocking her back and sliding her across the crowd.

The earth-shaking crash of the building against the ground, with the horrible silencing of many terrified civilians, would have been a terrible disaster, but since this is like an action movie, it's just fine and rather cool (we're all hypocrites, face it). Gwen was the first to recover, groaning out.

"Thank God there's no pain in this simulation," she muttered, then realized who was holding her. "Um, Tyler? You can let go of me now."

The jock let out a startled cry, and let go of her. "Um, I just want to say that I was just trying to save you, and was in no way trying to make an improper advance-"

"Shut up and accept my thanks," she snapped as she stood up and then helped him up too. She looked at the building remains, scattered all over the street with a huge dust cloud hovering over it. She started to rummage through it, but recoiled when she found DJ's lifeless body.

"No no no, not him too," she cried out. "Oh, damn that platypus! Damn him to hell!"

She shook her head, then heard a little moan from underneath the wreckage. She pulled some of it off, and Tyler tried to help, but ended up dropping a bar on his foot. Gwen groaned and lifted some more wreckage to find Rodney.

"Oh, my head," he whimpered. He rubbed said cranium underneath his helmet, which, judging from the large dents in it, had just saved his virtual life. "There's no pain, but I feel numb and dizzy."

"Just take it easy, sweetheart," she cautioned him. "We gotta get out of here, that platypus is destroying everything."

"Right, let's go," Tyler said, but when he tried to stand up, he fell down and grabbed his foot. "Gah, this stupid food is all numb and such, I cannot stand on it!"

"Maybe you broke it virtually?"

"Well, don't worry about me, you two have got to escape," Tyler said, swallowing as he decided his fate. "Go on!"

Gwen hesitated, and Rodney seized that to declare, "No! We won't leave someone behind! Because… well, I've forgotten all those really neat quotes people give in times like these, so… no! Just, no!"

He hauled Tyler up, and instructed Gwen to support his arm over her shoulders, then took his opposite hand and placed it on his helmet. "Use the dents for a handle, if you need to," he instructed. "Now come on, let's go!"

"We'll be traveling at three miles a day at this rate, Rodney," Gwen pointed out.

"I know… but I don't want Lindsay to worry. She was gushing about Tyler nonstop after she saw some notes in the closet!"

(Janitor's Closet - Groovy like your kneecaps.)

Gwen - "Okay, seriously, in all seriousness and no joke meant… can I adopt Rodney?"

Tyler - *He is reading the notes on the closet wall.* "So these are the notes Lindsay wrote? Well, I surely hope it's not Trent writing them to her! … Or Leshawna, but I'm sure he'd know better, and he'd better not cheat on Gwen!"

Rodney - *He is also reading the notes.* "Wow, I'll have to remember this… maybe I could do one… for…" *He blushes and pulls his helmet down to cover his eyes.* "Um… I don't wanna say just yet!"

Ezekiel - "Ever since the zombie challenge, I've bin killed nonstop, eh. I knoo' I shoo'dent complain too much, but it is kind of a drag, I like fighting in these things! But then a'geen, I could always check the sights here!" *He starts to read the notes, and blinks.* "Zed and S? That Zed isn't me, isn't it? Oh wait, no, that'd be E, I've bin called Zeke too often."

DJ - *He also is reading the notes.* "So… should I do one of these too? I don't know… I think my mother would be a little bit disapproving of my writing notes on the wall. Should focus more on the game… oh, wait, I got eliminated. Man, what can one do?"

*He frowns and crosses his arms in a sulk.* "There's gotta be something one can do if you cannot compete or write love notes to someone! Anything… hmm…"

Geoff - *He is looking at a list that has been tapped on the opposite wall.* "Dishes… trash… make the bed… dude, who put up a list of chores in here?"

(Panicky Mob, Team 5 - Izzy, Sakaki.)

"Okay, I have this plan."

"No… that's okay."

"We get this catapult, or maybe a trebuchet!"

"I don't like where this is going…"

"And then you can load gunpowder or something even more dangerous, like popcorn kernels!"

"Please don't tell me anymore…"

"See, popcorn kernels get stuck in your mouth like a total bitch! I had this one at the back of my throat, and I was hacking up like a cat with a fur ball, but I couldn't get it out, and so when I, like, stuck my finger back there to pick it out, I accidentally induced-"

"That's it, I cannot take it anymore!"

Sakaki was frantically pushing the emergency button on the elevator, but like anything in a real emergency, it didn't work. Izzy raised one of her orange eyebrows. "You know, you're not supposed to panic in these situations."

"I cannot help it! So what if I'm a coward? Just let me outta here!"

"But you'll never get the fun of fighting a giant centipede with nothing but your wits and brains!"

"I'm scared witless and my brain's telling me to run!"

Izzy grabbed the moe's shoulders and shook her. "Listen you! Izzy has something important to tell you! You must live life! Izzy lives life, and she loves it!"

"I love it too, by living life in a way that doesn't threaten to end it."

"Silly, we're in a virtual reality world, you have nothing to fear."

"Except for a giant maw of a centipede coming at me that will undoubtably haunt my dreams."

"No, but see, you need courage! After all, there's a boy you're interested in, and you gotta show him you have courage!"

"H-h-how did you know that?"

"It's up in the janitor's closet, with all the other crushes and pairings. Heh, I was always a fan of Bridgold, and Alfizzy too!"

As Sakaki tried to make sense of this, the elevator dinged and opened up on the roof. Izzy immediately went to the supplies that had been carelessly left there by the workmen (who, in their virtual panic, tried to escape by leaping off the hotel roof and flapping their arms really fast). Izzy started to build, a flurry of hammering and tying and making inappropriate remarks at those passing by like a true construction worker.

Sakaki was beet red when Izzy was almost done with her trebuchet. "I do not have legs like a pin-up," she whimpered, hiding one leg behind the other. "And I… didn't get most of the others."

"Shame that. Well then, I'm ready!" Izzy posed next to her trebuchet and beamed like a proud mother. "What do you think?"

"How is this going to stop a giant centipede?"

"You gotta believe! Faith flings the fodder!"

The moe girl swallowed hard, and whimpered, "Okay, I'll trust you."

"Excellent! Now for fodder!"

Izzy ran around, looking for stuff to launch from the hotel roof. Sakaki watched her, and tried to give some advice. "No, I wouldn't try the tools, they aren't big enough. I doubt you can tear one of those metal vents from the frame, Izzy. … Put me down, not me, not me!"

"Fine, you big sissy," Izzy said as she placed the frightened moe on her feet. "I'll just use these conveniently placed cinder blocks!"

She loaded up the trebuchet with a bunch of cinder blocks, and watched as the giant centipede came crawling down the street, eating civilians and smashing buildings. "Okay, if my calculations are right, I should be able to hit him… now!"

She launched the trebuchet, and the cinder blocks were hurled into the air. Sure enough, they came crashing down on the centipede, bashing painfully; one of its legs was severed.

This only seemed to infuriate the giant monster, and it let out a roar of fury. Charging forward, it smashed its bulk into the hotel. The large building started to cave in on itself, then pitched forward.

"Oh, what a predicament," Izzy said calmly as Sakaki gripped onto her, trembling in terror as the building trembled too. As it started to fall forward, the redhead tapped her lips and said, "Well, with my side calculations, I can guess if we jump at my command, we should survive! … Ready, Sakaki?"

"… Mommy!"

"Ready then! … NOW!"

There was a terribly ghastly noise of a hotel smashing against the street. There was a terribly ghastly roar of an infuriated centipede, who was now smashing everything in sight. The dust cloud forming up made it impossible for anyone to see anything in the area…

Including you, you're in suspense now. Ha.

(Janitor's Closet - Wild like your widow's peak.)

Sakaki - "Why must I be such a coward? I must stand up for myself… starting now, I will no longer overreact…"

*She pauses when she sees the notes on the wall. Noticing the "Sebastian 3 Sakaki" note, she, in a flurry of embarrassment, waves her hands and accidentally knocks off all the notes from the wall.*

Izzy - *She looks down at her foot, and then laughs.* "Hey everyone, check this out! I stomped all over DunCourt! Har har!"

…

Crystal and Beth - Crystal - "Thanks for helping me posting this again, sweetheart."

Beth - "No problem! I wonder who went stomping on all of these to begin with, anyway."

*The door opens and a leg is extended into view.*

Izzy - *off-screen* "Sorry, I think I still got NoCo stuck to my shoe."

(Hysteric Crowd, Team 1 - Alfred, Mandy, Sebastian.)

"So when do you plan on driving?" Alfred was asking Mandy as they walked. Their slow pace was due to catching their breath, running from destruction that the platypus.

"I was going to learn when I was eighteen, because I don't really need to drive around yet."

"What about going out to places?" Sebastian asked.

"Mortal pleasures have no excitement for me. I will eventually indulge, but right now, I prepare for the world's end."

"I'd gladly indulge in them with you," Alfred said, winking at the cultist girl. She felt her face hid up and looked away, growling in annoyance at her mortal obviousness. Sebastian chuckled at this and shrugged.

"Me, I took up driving to ensure I can get Chinese take-out when I want," the philosopher said.

"You like that stuff?"

Sebastian nodded and mimed using chop sticks. Mandy sighed and shook her head. "I could never get the hang of those things."

"And I cannot eat Chinese, goes right to my thighs," Alfred admitted.

The three turned a corner, and were startled to see a barricade being set up by the military. Alfred ran over, excited and eager, and called out, "Hey dudes of the army! How's it going?"

"Hello, random citizen," one of the soldiers said. "Are you in peril?"

"Giant, perilous, egg-laying mammal smashing through the city, seems like I am."

"Well, we have all kinds of weapons here to help you out."

The soldier handed Alfred a rifle, and he grinned. "This could be good," he said. "Though I don't know a little bullet will stop Platy-zilla! Got a rocket launcher?"

"RPG-7, that good enough?"

The soldier handed him the weapon, which almost knocked him over with the weight. He grinned and said, "May I test this out?"

"Sure, we've got tons of rockets!"

Another solider tapped the generous soldier's shoulder. "Um, are you sure we should let random citizens use RPG-7s?"

"Of course!"

Alfred pointed the RPG-7 at a little store, and fired. The entire front of the building was obliterated in an ear-blowing explosion, to which the gonzo cheered. "Hooray, I blew the hell out of that crappy shoe store!"

Mandy raised an eyebrow. "Well, that'll be fun for the giant platypus, but don't expect it to work on Cthulhu, mister."

"Sure thing! You wanna try?"

The cultist girl looked away again. "Um, I'm not sure if I should, the kickback might throw me back."

"Here, let me steady you!"

Alfred helped Mandy stand properly, hands on her hips. When the RPG-7 was loaded, he pat her head and she shot at the shoe store. The second wall was destroyed, shoes on fire shooting everywhere.

"Woohoo! This is fun," Mandy cheered. "Lemme have another!"

Sebastian watched them, fiddling with his dreadlocks. "You two realize we have an objective, right?"

"So do we," the second soldier declared. "And we haven't time to be blowing up shoe stores!"

Another rocket was launched, and hit the third wall of the shoe store. Alfred and Mandy cheered as the first soldier pumped his fists and handed them another rocket. His fellow soldier let out a cry of disgust. "No, not more random rocketing!"

"We have an infinite amount of ammo, dude, NPCs always do!"

There was yet another rocket launch, this time with Sebastian holding the RPG-7. Alfred and Mandy cheered as the rocket hit the last bastion of the building, as the second soldier angrily protested, "Stop breaking the fourth wall already!"

"Who's breaking the fourth wall?" Alfred asked.

"It's happened twice now, some dude guy on the other side of town did it."

"How'd you know about that?" Sebastian inquired.

"Because we're all NPCs, and thus know these things…"

The soldier trailed off, and then slapped his forehead. "You just made me break the fourth wall, didn't you?"

"Yep, but don't feel so bad. Now we have a giant platypus to slay, so how about we get ready?"

A building nearby was smashed into pieces, all the walls at once. The platypus peeked over the wreckage, and let out a wet growl. It stomped towards them, wriggling its forearms at them.

"Okay, platypus," Alfred said, holding up the RPG-7, "time to… umm…"

"What are you waiting for?" the second soldier asked. "Shoot it!"

"But I cannot think of a catchy phrase," Alfred whimpered. "You have to for these situations!"

"No, you don't!"

"Yes, you do," Mandy retaliated.

"No! You don't!"

"Yes," everyone else, even the other soldiers, shouted, "you do!"

The lone solider grumbled. "Fine, how about just say, 'Eat this'?"

"No, way too common," Alfred said. "How about 'Time to be platy-crushed'?"

"You're blowing it up," Mandy pointed out. "How about 'flatty-pus'?"

"Doesn't really work either," Sebastian said, shaking his head. "Why not just make up something not related to the platypus?"

"You mean like, 'My RPG-7 will send you to heaven'?"

"Sounds too nice," Mandy remarked.

The platypus was infuriated at being ignored, and reached down. Soldiers and contestants scattered as the giant mammal picked up a tank in each of its fore flippers. One was eaten, the other chucked at the remains of the shoe store. With a satisfied grunt, the platypus turned to eye the contestants.

"Okay, um," Alfred stammered as he positioned himself, "let me just go with… gonna make you into platy-mush!"

"That's terrible," Mandy protested as Alfred pulled the trigger. The launched rocket blazed towards the giant monster, who backhanded it, sending it sprawling out in the city and blowing up a random hot dog stand.

"See, this is why a good phrase is needed," Alfred whimpered.

"How is that even physically possible?" said Mandy. "You just cannot backhand a rocket!"

"There's something else that needs addressing now," said Sebastian. "As in right now."

"What's that?" both Mandy and Alfred asked.

"RUN!"

The three sprinted off, screaming in terror as the military fought against the platypus. Alas, unlike in war games or in real life, the military is about as affective at stopping a giant monster as Congress would be.

(Janitor's Closet - Foxy like your shoulder blades.)

Sebastian - "Some say that if you focus too hard on something, you're unable to focus. But of course, if you don't focus, you cannot get the job done. So what is the limit on focusing? Many great people have debated over this, and to me, the limit is when you have to stop to think about a catchphrase. Still, nice try, Alfred."

Alfred - "I don't know much about platypi, my friend Keith is the real zoo-going guy. See this one time, my buddy Keith has been to the zoo, and I think he's fallen in every pen: the piranha, the lions, the gators, the elephants, even the flamingos gave him a ruffling when he fell in there! I've only fallen in one, but luckily, those tigers turned out to be real sweet."

Mandy - "I cannot believe Alfred was lucky enough to have fallen in with the tigers! I want that kind of luck before Cthulhu wipes zoos off the world, releasing animals into their natural habitat… and then devouring them all. Hehe, the irony!"

(Panicky Mob, Team 6 - Belinda, Noah.)

Belinda and Noah had not spoken much since their escape from the centipede. Noah seemed to have a fascination of the ground he was walking on, staring down the entire way. Belinda glanced at him from time to time, then spoke up.

"A million dollars for your thoughts?"

"What?"

"A penny seems really cheap, plus there is inflation."

"Cute, but I'm not the talking kind."

"You sure?"

"Positive, just leave me be to my thoughts."

Belinda shrugged. "Sorry, I just thought after our conversation at the café, you'd be more open."

"The conversation revolved mostly around your panties."

"Funny, I don't remember that."

"What?" Noah balked. "But… but… you brought it up!"

"Did I? Weren't you the one who just mentioned it?"

Noah seethed and looked away. "You're just trying get under my skin. I know your kind."

"My kind?"

"Yes, you act like you're reading people, like you have keen observational skills. Well, I'm not here to be a lab rat, you just will have to do without talking to me."

"Such a shame, I always believed you would be fine to talk to. You just really have been bitter since Katie was voted off, haven't you?"

"Must you insist on twisting the knife?"

"You're only doing that to yourself, Noah," she said. "When Katie left, you ostracized yourself from the others, people who could have been there for you."

The bookworm was silent again, a combination of sulk and seethe. Belinda didn't follow up on the conversation, just continued to walk as they avoided hysteric civilians, the occasional debris flying through the air, and cars racing down the street and sometimes the sidewalk.

"You know," Noah grumbled as he slid down the lamp pole he had shimmied up to avoid being struck by a car, "I really just want to get out of this city."

"Feeling's mutual, but we'll have to hope the others make it; if not enough of us get out, we're all screwed."

"I thought you were supposed to be clairvoyant, why must you insist on saying the very obvious?"

"Because sometimes," Belinda said, "the obvious is right in front of us, and we cannot see it."

"So now you're some philosopher too?"

"More interesting to talk about than my panties."

"See? See there you go, you're the one who keeps bringing up the underwear! I'm not interested in talking about girls' underwear."

"My my."

"You know what I meant…"

The bookworm fumed, and when he looked up to reply in some way he was sure would be witty enough, he saw what Belinda was observing. One of the bridges leading to outside the city was just around the corner, and a short walk would lead them to safety. The clairvoyant golf-clapped and smiled. "How marvelous."

"Yes, a bridge, lovely," Noah grumbled. "Just why a giant centipede cannot cross this thing is just fringe logic, makes my head hurt."

Belinda giggled, and then the entire world seemed to shake, from ground to sky. Ears rattled at a tremendous roar, people lost their balance and fell over, and many hot dog stands were disturbed. Noah managed to catch Belinda before she hit the ground.

"Are you okay?"

"Fine fine, but I think the city is in terrible trouble now," Belinda replied. "I believe the centipede is going berserk."

"Oh, you sensed it? What, did it complain that it cannot find shirts with enough sleeves or something?"

The world around them shook again from another fierce roar, and then the terrible crashing of buildings followed. This was not ordinary crashing of buildings (but then again when is it ever), but the sounds of destruction were nonstop. Noah could feel the ground tremble like a steady earthquake.

"I don't know much about arthropods, that's more Harold's field," Belinda admitted, "but I'm willing to believe that this monster has some sort of berserk. It must be a way to ensure it destroys as much as possible."

Noah was quiet, squatting down and drumming his fingers on his knuckles. She glanced down at him, and said, "If ever there was a time to leave the city, it's now."

"No."

He stood up and started to walk back into the city. "Like you said, the obvious is right in front of us. I got an idea what I need to do to slay this giant centipede."

"Even if we can escape?"

"You can if you want, but I owe some people an apology. And I think taking out this beast will be a good step along the way. See you later, Belinda, I have myself a rare achievement to earn."

He started forward, cracking his knuckles and chuckling. Noah was flexing his neck when he saw Belinda was walking alongside him. "Wait, you aren't leaving?" he asked.

"Sorry, Noah, but if you want to take out this giant centipede, you're going to have to have my help."

"Any particular reason why you're going to risk it all in helping me?"

"Because it's fun."

(Janitor's Closet - Sweet like your pancreas.)

Noah - "I do resent having to apologize just because I may have lost my temper once. There are jerks out there who do far worse things, unprovoked, and people just sweep it under the rug; however, someone like me does something a little negative, and they flip. Oh, if only this was a perfect world, where I could have an Ignore feature in real life."

Belinda - "Noah sure has a lot of emotional issues, I guess that happens when you are the youngest of nine. I wouldn't know how to relate, but at the least, I can try to make him the gentleman when Katie's not here. T'would benefit us all, I think." *She chuckles, and straightens some of the notes, then writes her own.* "Hehe, my own Notie note."

(Hysteric Crowd, Team 2 - Arthur, Colin, Valerie.)

"Move! Move your butt!"

"I'm moving, Valerie!"

"Move move move!"

"I am, damn it, I cannot possibly move any more than I already am! If you want me to move faster, just say so!"

"Quit being a wiseass and move!"

Buildings were being smashed behind them, civilians were being stomped, etc., all that jazz. The platypus was going berserk, quacking and grunting as it tore through the city. The three teenagers were moving away from it, in the most extreme sense of running like the devil was after them (if the devil had a bill, flippers, and a poisonous barb near its leg).

"Where is he?" Arthur shouted. "I don't want to turn a corner and see him there!"

Valerie looked around, and tripped. Arthur took the time to stop and help her up, and when he looked, Colin had already ran off without them. This did not constitute as a loss to him.

"We are so screwed," Valerie grumbled. "That stupid platypus is going to tear everything apart! It always seems to be chasing us."

"Yeah, tell me about it," Arthur said, shaking his head. With this motion, he saw something he had overlooked: a sign pointing in the direction of the bridge. Perking up, he led them to the bridge, where the soldiers were finishing setting up the explosives.

"What are you two doing?" the political girl asked, "You cannot blow up the bridge, we have to cross!"

"We can hold off until you get across," the soldier said. He held up the firing trigger, and smiled with a chuckle. "Now this little tool will be the destruction of that bridge, you can take it and press it when you get across."

"Why would we want to blow up the bridge at all?" Arthur balked. "I mean, that makes no logical sense! It would only prevent people from escaping, and the monster can swim!"

The soldier let out a victorious laugh, and pointed at his partner. "Told you! I knew it made no sense for us, it's like some poorly written B-movie!"

"Our city is under attack by a giant platypus," the other shouted, "what would you constitute that?"

Valerie rolled her eyes, and then saw, in the distance, the platypus was crawling onto the shore of the other side. Grunting as it pulled itself up, it stepped onto the bridge, stomping on cars along the way. The politician girl grinned and swiped the firing trigger from the solider.

"Perfect," she shouted. "Let's blow the platypus to mush!"

"That was lame," the soldier whined.

Arthur swallowed as he looked at the platypus walking towards them from the far end. Then he saw three figures running at them too, three familiar girls. He immediately grabbed Valerie's wrist, trying to pull the blasting trigger away. "No! Stop! Some of our teammates are on the bridge!"

"To hell with them," Valerie shouted back. "We can kill the monster!"

"Booby-traps like these never work on monsters, haven't you ever watched any?"

"Shut up, you closet nerd!"

She kneed him in the stomach and shoved him off, then pressed the trigger. The bridge was engulfed with fiery explosions, blasts that threw the soldiers and Valerie off their feet from the sheer force. Arthur gasped for air, trying to steady himself as he looked up and saw the bridge collapse and sink into the water.

Valerie sat up and chuckled. "Hey, closet nerd, wanna sing a song? How about London Bridge is Falling Do-"

"Oh shut up, that's not clever in the least!"

(Maclean Stadium, Arena.)

Almost everyone who had been eliminated was watching the contest by Vera's large screens. Katie and Courtney were mostly talking, but so quiet and to each other that no one could hear what they were saying, even those trying to listen in like a nervous Geoff.

"Seems like things are really heating up, eh?"

Geoff almost jumped out of his seat when Ezekiel sat down next to him and spoke. He stared at Ezekiel like if he couldn't understand how his actions, or even his existence, could be fathomed. This confused the prairie boy, who calmly asked, "So, where's Bridgette?"

"… What?"

"Well, she was eliminated early on, I thought you would want to sit next to her or something."

"Oh! Well, it's all cool and groovy, yeah. I mean, it's not like I'm avoiding her or anything-"

"Hi, Zeke!"

Ezekiel looked over to see Bridgette sit down next to him. "Sorry to see you got eliminated too."

"Oh yeah, darn crowds, eh. But doo'nt let me get in the way of talking to Geoff."

"What do you mean, where is he?"

Ezekiel gestured to the seat next to him, which, to his great shock, was empty now. He looked around and stammered, "Wh-what? He was just here!"

"If he was, I guess that means he's still avoiding me," she said with a heavy sigh. "I really wish I knew why."

"I cannot imagine why either."

Bridgette almost jumped as Harold sat down next to her. The nerd shrugged and said, "Maybe he's just trying to surprise you or something, and he doesn't want you catching on?"

Both of the boys were confused when Bridgette started fiddling with her ponytail, looking at Harold as if afraid he'd bite. "Well, it's just… surprise… I dunno… I just think… that… look over there, a three-headed monkey!"

Both boys looked to where she was pointing, though all they saw was Chef Hatchet fiddling with a rubber band ("He only has one head," Harold mused, "and that's more like a gorilla!"). When they looked back at her, Bridgette was gone, and there was the sound of someone scurrying under the chairs behind them.

"What is up with her, eh?" Ezekiel asked his friend.

"I don't know, I've never seen her like that," Harold admitted. "Sadly, I don't know exactly how to interpret it all."

(Janitor's Closet - Rocks like your socks.)

Heather - *She is engrossed in the notes on the wall until she realizes that the camera is still running.* "I wasn't reading those love notes! I was just… staring into space! Anyway, Ezekiel once asked me if I had any idea why some of the other contestants are acting weird and avoiding their friends. I wish I could answer him seriously… and the horrible irony is, I'm in the exact same position as they are."

Colin - *He is tearing up the notes.* "Morons, you have only yourselves to blame for putting these up when you knew I was here, so *censored* your love and crushes!

*He proceeds to rip up every single note, and Harold's haikus.* "Haha, I cannot wait to see the looks on their stupid faces! But anyway, about what I was going to say. When Valerie blew up that bridge, I gotta say, that was awesome. But what followed was even cooler…"

(Hysteric Crowd, Team 2 - Arthur, Valerie.)

"Did you have to do that right away?" Arthur was shouting at Valerie. "You could have waited for our teammates!"

"Why do you care, you closet nerd loner? You're just lucky I did the job you couldn't, oh glorious leader!"

The soldiers exchanged looks, and the more sensible one said, "Hey guys, don't fight! We should all be friends!"

"You cannot preach that," the other soldier declared, "we're the military in a war zone, you stupid moron idiot!"

"Be nice, we're not fighting each other!"

The pleas fell to deaf ears as Valerie and Arthur continued to shout at each other. "I just saved us from the monster," she declared, "I saved you and your stupid hair and stupid jacket and stupid… stupidness!"

"Then tell me, Pretty in Pink," Arthur said, poking her in the chest, "why is the game still running? Why are we still here if you killed the beast?"

The answer came when a giant flipper rose up from the side of the cliff that the military outpost was camped on. The giant platypus, burned and scarred but still very much alive, pulled itself up. It grunted and heaved, then raised its other flipper high in the air. The soldiers screamed and ran away, as did Valerie and Arthur, but they weren't as lucky. The giant's flipper came crashing down on the two teens, crushing them as the beast pulled itself up. With a sad and pained grunt, it plodded towards the city, wet and burnt and very intent on creating a roaring rampage of revenge.

The soldiers peeked out from their hiding place, and one whispered to the other, "Well, technically, it wasn't our fault, was it?"

"No, we just set it up, they pressed the trigger. Poor fellows, smeared into the street."

"That's not how I want to go. I want to go the best way an NPC can go: sacrificing myself to save a PC."

"Will you stop with breaking the fourth wall already? You cannot…"

The soldier trailed off when he heard someone coughing from the edge of where the bridge used to be, and saw a girl pulling herself up the side. Both of them went to help her, as she gasped for air on her hands and knees.

"You survived that?" one asked her. "That's awesome!"

"Was… kinda… my friends… didn't make it."

"Well hon, sorry to say, but the beast did."

"What?" she asked, looking up to see the tail of the platypus slipping around a corner, following with a wet roar and the smashing of a building. "Oh man… that's so unfair."

"Yeah, tell us about it," the soldier remarked. "But what can you do?"

"I'll tell you what I can do," she snarled as she picked herself up, steadying herself on her feet. "I can stop feeling sorry for myself! I let griping about not having a boyfriend get me distracted, and forgot what I was determined to become! I won't let some duck get the best of me!"

"You know Captain Groucho?" the soldier asked.

"Yes, a little," Carol said, wiping her mouth and spitting to the side. "But I won't let grief get the best of me anymore! I'm an enthusiast, so no more angst! No more wangst! I ain't no 'wangster'!"

"Double negatives don't help prove your point," the more grouchy of the two soldiers grumbled.

Carol punched him in the throat. "Shut up, little NPC! Nothing will deter me now! I'll do this for Lindsay, for Beth, and also, for me! I'm Carol Christmas, and I won't let a giant platypus stop on my city!

"You hear that, you big wet stupid beast?" she hollered as she charged forward, shaking her fist in the air, "Officer Christmas is coming to town, and she's going to put you down! Cha-aaaaaaaaaaarge!"

As she cha-aaaaaaaaaaarged forth, the more polite of the two soldiers saluted her from behind. "I like her," he said with a smile.

The other soldier, nursing his sore throat, grumbled, "Yeah, you would, she's crazy enough to change after a giant that's smashing skyscrapers and roaring for blood."

"What can I say? I've always loved Christmas time."

"Oh, when I recover, you are going to pay for that one!"

…

…

…

How can Team Hysteric Crowd bring down the giant platypus? How can Team Panicky Mob defeat the giant centipede?

Will Noah redeem himself? Will Carol?

And seriously, what is Bridgold? It sounds like some forgotten element off the periodic table. We know we've heard it before, is it important?

Panicky Mob (vs. Giant Centipede):

Team 3 - Crystal.

Team 4 - Heather, Justin, Xander, Leshawna.

Team 6 - Belinda, Noah.

Missing - Sadie, Zachary, Izzy, Sakaki.

Died - Harold, Courtney, Anita, Eva, Cody, Bridgette.

...

Hysteric Crowd (vs. Giant Platypus):

Team 1 - Alfred, Mandy, Sebastian.

Team 2 - Colin.

Team 3 - Carol.

Team 4 - Tyler, Rodney, Gwen.

Missing - Clive.

Died - Geoff, Yoshi, Ezekiel, DJ, Beth, Lindsay, Valerie, Arthur.

Janitor Closet's Decorations to Date - A whole bunch of torn-up love notes and haikus scattered all over the floor, then stomped on by a certain *bad word*.

...

Next Up - Twas cutie that fell the beast!