Warning: Graphic depictions of violence.
She heard the footsteps outside the door to her prison, but even as the heavy footfalls reached her ears, Clarke didn't look up, didn't even open her eyes. It wouldn't have mattered even if she had: the complete darkness of the room swallowed her up, shrouding her in a black too thick to see through. She remained on the ground, back pressed firmly against the now familiar wall, knees drawn to her chest and forehead pressed against her knees. The manacles on her ankles weighed heavy, and the new weight of the ones on her wrists pulled her arms down as well, their chains giving her just enough room to curl her arms around her legs. To any who saw her in that moment, she looked beaten, broken, but inside she was calculating. She may be back in this cell, surely about to be punished for trying to escape, but she'd gotten out, and she'd left her message. Now she just had to wait for Lexa to find it, and then find her. She could make it: after all this, she had to make it.
The door swung open and two warriors approached her, their footsteps clearly getting louder as they got closer, but Clarke still didn't look up. Only when they stopped did she open her eyes, her sight adjusting to the new light until she could see their boots and legs just at the edge of her vision. Without warning their hands were on her, yanking her roughly to her feet. She didn't fight back, didn't bother to try, even when a pair of hands came into her line of sight, and then one warrior was kneeling down by her legs, releasing the manacles around her ankles. The second warrior held her tightly by the shoulders, as though she might run away, but Clarke made no effort to do so. There was no point: after her escape, she was sure that Nia had placed warriors outside of the tower in the event she did try to get away from these two, and even if not she was sure there were any number of other warriors around, all told to keep their eyes sharp. She had escaped once and had no doubt she wouldn't be able to do so again. She would have to wait, silently taking whatever punishment Nia wanted to hand to her, and wait for Lexa to find her.
The weight around her wrists fell away and the two warriors moved, one going to each side of her. The next moment her arms were twisted painfully behind her back, causing her to let out a sharp breath as she tried not to wince. They pushed her forward and she started walking, knowing that no amount of fighting would get her away from them. She was too weak, too tired from everything she'd already been through, and already she was tired from what she knew must happen next. So she walked, allowing them to lead her out of the dark room and back into daylight, the blonde squinting as the sudden bright blinded her momentarily. Only then, out in the sun, did she finally lift her head, eyes scanning around her hurriedly. People were everywhere, some of them clearly warriors with their hands on their swords or bows or guns as they watched her pass, others clearly not, many holding bags or baskets, animal skins or children. They watched her too, and when she met their eyes she found the fear and flashes of sympathy, and realized they didn't fear her, but what was about to happen to her. They feared their queen, the one who was supposed to protect them, and again her rage and hatred for Nia swirled inside her, building like a growing storm.
After being pushed through the growing crowds, Clarke looked before her and set her jaw, holding her head a little higher. She saw the twin posts they were leading her to and the chains that hung from them, as well as the single post standing many yards away with blade marks all along it, but she refused to show fear. Nia could try to break her body as much as she wanted: Clarke would never talk, and to prove it she just lifted her chin higher, not letting herself fight back against the warriors holding her even as her heartbeat began to race in her chest.
They reached the twin poles and then the warriors were shoving her between them, one of them once again holding her in place while the other grabbed one of her arms and lifted it as well as one of the chains, and then a new manacle was around her wrist and she couldn't drop her arm down. The action was repeated on her other side, and when the two warriors stepped back she remained stuck between the two large poles, her arms held out to her sides, and she had no doubt that no amount of pulling would release her, so she didn't even try. Instead she stood stock still, head still high even as her heart beat at a speed it'd never reached before. A crowd had begun to gather around her, light murmurings coming from a few of them, but Clarke just looked ahead, not meeting anyone's eyes. This was going to happen, and there was nothing she could do about it, but that didn't mean she would give Nia the satisfaction of showing her fear.
Movement from the crowd caught her eye and she turned her head just slightly when she saw it part, and then simply clenched her jaw even harder as she saw the queen walking towards her, a little smile pulling at the corners of her lips. Maloch walked just a few steps behind her, and the smirk on his face was anything but small. His fingers were wrapped around something, and in the brief moment Clarke let her gaze drop to it, the beads of sweat on her forehead only grew as her fear gripped her harder even as she fought to keep it from showing. Beside him walked Costia, her eyes already on the prisoner, back rigid as she moved forward with her lips pressed in a tight line. Just behind her walked Walsh, and the moment Clarke saw him her eyes widened, everything suddenly clicking into place. The rage in her gut rolled, spreading out through her and warming her limbs, and rather than fight against it, she let herself sink into it. A number of other warriors followed them, but it was these four who Clarke watched, unable to stop the glare she threw at them. They looked at her, and from the glint in Nia's eyes and the grin on Maloch's face, her pulse only sped up.
The queen moved until she stood just a few feet in front of the chained blonde, her eyes not leaving Clarke's once they met. Stubborn eyes met icy ones, and for a moment no one spoke, the crowd's breath held as the two leaders stared one another down. Finally the smirk on the queen's face grew before she told Clarke softly, "You made a foolish choice, Clarke. I do not like when my prisoners try to leave me."
"I don't exactly like being held prisoner, so I guess neither of us get to be happy," the blonde replied evenly, still meeting Nia's hard gaze. The queen quirked an eyebrow, the single movement enough to draw Clarke's attention to it, before she offered, "We could both be happy, Clarke. Tell me what I wish to know, and then I will have what I want from you and can release you. All you must do to end the pain is tell me Lexa's secrets; that is all it will take."
Rather than say anything, the prisoner just held her head high, shifted where she stood so that she could stand straighter, and refused to look away from the queen's cold eyes. She heard the smirk in his voice as Maloch murmured, "She does not seem to care what happens to her," but still didn't look at anyone but the girl directly in front of her.
Nia's eyes flicked back and forth between the blonde's, as though studying her. A moment later her head tilted to the side just slightly before she mused, "You don't, do you?" She stepped forward, closing the space between them until her face was a mere few inches away from Clarke's, eyes still scanning the blonde's. "You are strong, that is clear. You believe you cannot be broken." The look in those icy eyes made breathing difficult, the fear the prisoner felt quickly growing to something akin to panic, but still she didn't let it show. One corner of the woman's mouth turned up, even as she shrugged. She turned, stepping back and once again putting more distance between them, before saying loudly, "You are wrong, of course. Everyone can be broken. It is just a matter of finding the right way." Her eyes darted over to Maloch, gesturing briefly with a tilt of her head. "Get her ready."
"Sha ai kwin," he replied, and then his smirk only grew as he stalked across the space before him, his gaze directly going to Clarke's immobilized form. His eyes moved over the girl's body and she could easily see the glint in them, and she tried not to shudder as the hand without the whip in it reached out, gently running along her arm as he walked around her. The hand moved down to her side, fingers briefly grasping at her waist before it moved to her back, and suddenly she heard a rip and felt cool air against her bare back as the shirt was torn almost to her shoulder blades. She felt fingers brush briefly along her spine and this time she wasn't able to keep her shudder in before the man stepped back, his attention returning to his leader and waiting for the command.
Nia met his look and was about to nod at him to begin when once again the crowd behind them parted and more of her warriors stepped up, dragging another form between them. When Clarke realized who the form was, for the first time she fought against the restraints holding her in place, her eyes going wide. Nadia stood between them, her fear clear even as she tried to hide it. She had multiple bruises along her face, and on her bare arms Clarke could see more bruising and a number of shallow cuts, all which bled sluggishly still. The gash along her forehead continued to drip down the side of her face, only looking worse now than it had when the two of them had been split up upon returning to the village. The shirt she wore was nearly soaked through in places with sweat, and Clarke didn't have to wonder if there were more injuries along her body that were hidden from view.
"Let her go!" she yelled, still pulling against the restraints, eyes boring holes into Nia. The queen simply raised her eyebrows at her while Nadia called to the blonde, "Do not speak, Clarke! You must not break!" Nia flicked her wrist, and suddenly one of the warriors holding the younger girl in place slammed his fist into her stomach, causing her to double over. "No!" Clarke screamed, fighting against the restraints harder, but no amount of pulling could free her of them.
Clarke was about to yell again when Jojesh pushed through the crowd, his face drawn as his eyes fell first on his sister and then back to his queen. A small group followed him, Echo standing among two people the blonde had never seen before, but the fact that the woman held Nadia's son in her arms told her that they were her parents. Their eyes were on Nadia, tears silently running down the woman's face as her husband held on to her, but Jojesh's focus remained on the queen, not looking away. Clarke could see the concern for his sister on his face, but he held his back straight as he approached the queen, his family staying back at the edge of the crowd. He stopped just a few feet away from her, and she met his look with disinterest. A few of the warriors near the queen shifted, unsure what to make of his approach, but everyone's eyes widened when he slowly fell to his knees in front of her.
"Beja," he begged, his voice loud enough for everyone to hear even as he bowed his head before her. "Please my queen, have mercy on my sister. She is little more than a child: she did not think and acted foolishly. Beja."
"She is a traitor, Jojesh," Nia informed him coldly, hard eyes falling down on the warrior at her feet. "She deserves to die a traitor's death. Why should I show mercy?"
"I am begging you," he pleaded, his head rising just enough so that he could meet her look. "Banish her. Strip her of everything she owns. Cast her out: just please, do not kill her."
Silence hung around them, Nia seeming to study her warrior as she once again raised an eyebrow. The crowd gathered around all watched, their entire focus shifting between the queen and the warrior on the ground before her, their collective breath seeming to be held as they waited to see what would happen. Finally she nodded, telling him a moment later, "You wish for me to show mercy? Very well, I will show this traitor my mercy. But first you must prove yourself to me." He lifted his chin, jaw set, and then Clarke watched as Nia's eyes flickered back to her. "You will give the prisoner her punishment."
"Jojesh, no!" Nadia cried, trying to pull away from her captors, but the warriors holding her silenced her with a rough shake. Her brother watched it, fists clenching at his side, and then he looked back to the queen. Before he could say or do anything, they all heard Sef call out, "Nono?" Clarke turned and saw the little boy shift in his grandmother's arms, saw him look over at his restrained mother, and then saw how Jojesh's eyes fell closed at the sound of his nephew. Eyes opening again, they flickered momentarily to his sister, and then turned back to the queen, and he nodded. He stood, turning his back to both Nia and his sister, and walked to the posts where Clarke stood. Moving behind the girl, he held out his hand, and Clarke distinctly heard the small growl Maloch let out before shoving the whip into the palm before him, stepping back to the queen's side once he'd released it. She couldn't see Jojesh any longer, but in the short pause that followed she knew the warrior had turned his attention back to his queen, waiting for her word.
Nia's eyes fell back to Clarke's, and the blonde did all she could to hide the sudden quick rise and fall of her chest as her breath picked up.
"Begin," the queen merely said, her eyes not leaving Clarke's.
"I am sorry," she heard whispered softly behind her, so quietly she doubted anyone else could hear, and then the next moment she heard the crack of the whip. She couldn't help but let out the small cry as the leather came down on her bare skin, the sting remaining even once the whip had left her. She clenched her teeth, refusing to cry out again as the whip came down a second time, a new pain erupting along her back. A third and then a fourth time the leather made contact with her bare skin, pain and heat rising from her body at every point of contact, and each time she fought to keep the pain bottled inside, fought to keep any cries from escaping. As the whip fell down against her over and over, she curled her fingers around the chains holding her in place, clenching them in a tight grip as she tried to anchor herself so that she could fight the pain. She could feel the welts forming, each lash of the whip causing a new stinging ache to erupt along her back, but she refused to let more than the soft cries fall from her lips. The prisoner fought against it all, and suddenly all of her hatred for the woman before her rose inside her, taking her over completely, and even as she winced as the tip of the leather hit her again, she raised her head up, eyes boring angrily into the queen's.
"I. Will. Not. Break," she growled, one word coming out between each lash. Out of the corners of her eyes she noticed members of the crowd start shifting in place, heard slight murmurs that she wouldn't have been able to make out even if she were completely fluent in their language, but still she didn't break eye contact with the queen.
"Everyone breaks eventually," the queen simply replied, eyes holding Clarke's even as she watched the blonde barely flinch as the whip struck her again.
Clarke didn't keep track of the number of lashes, but even as the pain increased with each hit, she refused to break eye contact with those cold eyes. Every now and then she would flinch as the whip struck where welts had already begun to form, a small cry breaking from her lips, but she refused to show anymore than that. To help keep her resolve up, she thought of one of the first lessons Lexa had taught her at their cave, repeated her words over and over in her head like a mantra. Pain: you take it, you fight through it, you ignore it. You do not let it beat you. You take it, you fight it, you ignore it: you do not let it beat you. The blonde grit her jaw harder as the whip came down once again, but rather than allow herself to think of it or how many more there might be, instead she focused on Lexa's voice in her head. The words were only a thought, but as she glared the queen down, she felt them run through her far more powerfully than the lash of the whip. Out of the corners of her eyes Clarke could see the audience around them, could see the people watching, and noticed as they began to shift, their eyes flickering from her to the queen. She herself never looked away from Nia, barely even blinked, her expression set in the defiance she felt coursing through her. The corners of the queen's lips began to pull down as the murmurings from the crowd began to grow just a little louder, and Clarke allowed that to fuel her even more.
"No!"
An angry cry suddenly broke through the space between the strikes, and suddenly Costia was running forward, an almost crazed expression pulling at her features.
"No," she growled again, eyes wild. "You aren't doing it hard enough! Everyone breaks." She ran behind Clarke, grabbing the whip from Jojesh's hand, immediately bringing it back. "Everyone breaks!" she repeated, almost more to herself than to anyone else, and then she brought the whip down with all her strength.
Clarke couldn't hold her cry in: the force of the leather against her skin in the one blow was greater than any had been before, and she didn't know if Jojesh had been holding back or if Costia was simply using more strength, but she could feel her skin rip apart where the whip struck her. Again the leather fell harshly against her back and again she cried out, no longer able to keep in the pain. Her eyes fell shut, held tightly closed to try to block the people around her out and keep the tears in as her body forced her to succumb to the pain. Her legs tried to take her away, tried to move her out of the line of fire of the demanding whip, but the shackles around her wrists held her in place. Costia rained the whip down on her back and with each lash she could feel her flesh break open, blood quickly covering her skin. She tried to hold in the tears but the agony was too great as the unforgiving leather ripped her skin open over and over, and soon they fell, mixing with her sweat as both rolled along her cheeks.
"Tell me what I want to know, Clarke," Nia ordered, her tone rising so that she could easily be heard over the crack of the whip and the blonde's cries. "Tell me Lexa's secrets."
At the name of the Commander the whip came down even harder and Clarke heard the unmistakeable sound of a sob come from behind her, and couldn't hold in her scream. The pain was too great, and Costia showed no signs of stopping even as her own breath grew wet and heavy behind Clarke, and so the prisoner let herself scream. She let herself scream, and she directed every one of her words at the queen as she did so. "No! I won't turn on her! I'll never tell you anything, so just go ahead and kill me!"
"Enough!" the queen suddenly exclaimed, and with one final strike of the whip Costia dropped her hand, stepping back as her breathing remained ragged, tears streaking down her face and eyes glaring at the blonde head before her as she shook. When the whip stopped, Clarke felt all the energy drain out of her, and she slumped forward, the chains the only thing holding her up. Her entire back burned white hot and she could feel the blood coating her skin as it rolled along her flesh, dripping down along her skin until it either soaked into the material of her pants or fell to the ground below her. Her body went limp, arms aching from holding her up, and her chest heaved as she tried to get her breathing back under control. Eyes opening, she could see the little red dots coloring the earth beneath her, and watched as a new drop splashed against the packed snow. She barely had the strength to lift her head up as the queen stepped forward once again, but somehow she managed, meeting the queen's look with as much defiance as she could muster.
"You will not die, Clarke," the queen promised her quietly, her tone so soft it was menacing. "But you will wish you had." Turning back around quickly, she locked eyes with the warriors still holding Nadia and gestured to the single post standing only a few yards away from them. "Chain her to the pole and gather the wood," she ordered. They nodded and then roughly pulled the girl between them to the pole, and Clarke's eyes widened as she realized what they were doing.
"You said you would have mercy!" Clarke cried, energy suddenly shooting through her again even as she heard Jojesh shift beside her.
"I am showing mercy," Nia replied evenly, a menacing tint to her voice. "She will not feel the blades she deserves: this will start and end with fire."
"No! No, beja," Jojesh begged again, panic in his voice, "Beja ai kwin!" He moved to take a step towards his sister, but suddenly Echo stepped forward from the crowd and moved beside him, wrapping both arms around his shoulders and holding him back. Faintly Clarke could hear her whispering to him quickly, but she didn't try to listen to what was being said. All she could focus on were the warriors already chaining the girl who had tried to help her to the post, others quickly piling wood at the girl's feet and up her body. "No! Stop!" Clarke screamed, the shackles around her wrists tearing into her skin as she desperately tried to save the only person who'd tried to help her.
"Tell me what I want to know and I will stop it," Nia growled, something like victory lining her voice. "Tell me everything about Lexa, and the girl will live."
Clarke's jaw dropped open and then immediately closed, and she went entirely still. Emotions whirled inside her, thoughts moving too quickly to really grasp. She couldn't turn on Lexa: she wouldn't. But she couldn't just let Nadia die for her either. She had tried to help her. She had tried to save her from this place. She had a family, a son, and Clarke couldn't let her die because of her. Too many people had already died because of her, and Clarke couldn't just stand by and watch it happen again. The blonde's mouth fell open, her jaw working a few times to try to grasp words, and Nia's eyes flashed, easily seeing the Sky girl's uncertainty, but just as the blonde was about to say something, a cry silenced her.
"No!" Nadia cried, her eyes boring into Clarke, and when the blonde turned to her, their eyes met and she could see the determination in them. "You must not break, Clarke! You must stay strong!" The blonde tried to argue, tried to say something, anything, but all she could do was shake her head, tears once again forming as she looked at the healer chained to the pole. Nadia saw it, and she turned away, scanning the crowd around her. "Ai Ubroukai op!" she exclaimed, her voice rising to be heard by each of them. Any who hadn't already been watching her turned, the entire crowd listening as her words washed over them. "She is the one who will free us when the Commander comes! Naia has led us down a path of death, but she will free our people when the queen dies! Ai Ubroukai op!"
With a snarl Nia nodded to one of her warriors, and suddenly he brought the torch he held down to the wood at the girl's feet, the tinder catching quickly. The healer ignored the flames licking at the wood around her legs, ignored them as they grew around her. Her mother began screaming, her cries too broken to be understood, tears falling freely along her cheeks as her grip on her grandson only tightened. Beside her, Nadia's father began shouting, his voice breaking in agony as he tried to run forward, tried to run to save his daughter. Echo stopped him, her body colliding with his as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, leaning all of her weight against his to hold him back. He pushed against her, desperately trying to shake himself free, but the warrior only held on tighter, furiously refusing to let him go even as her own tears ran down her face. Jojesh didn't try to rush forward, didn't let out any cries of agony like his parents: instead he fell back to his knees, his entire body crumpling beneath him as he was forced to watch the flames lick up the large branches and begin to dance along the furs still covering his sister's body. Behind him, Sef began wailing, the noise clearly terrifying him, and he began pushing against his grandmother's shoulder, crying for his mother at the top of his lungs. Nadia continued to yell out to the crowd around her, refusing to back down, until the flames started biting at her skin. She tried to fight it, but suddenly her yells turned to shrieks, the pure agony she felt coloring those cries. Clarke's stomach rolled at the noise but she paid no attention to it, too focused on the sight before her as the flames began to climb up Nadia and the post she remained bound to.
"No! No! No, Nadia!" Clarke screamed, her cries mixing in with both the other girl's and her family's. As his daughter's cries turned to wails of agony, Clarke saw the healer's father fight against his niece all the harder, his fists starting to rain down on the warrior's back. Echo only held on tighter, her jaw clenched as she just took the blows. Clarke strained against her chains, fighting them with every last bit of strength she had as her own tears streamed down her cheeks. She didn't feel the fierce pain as the wounds on her back opened further, didn't feel the hard steel biting into her skin and digging against her bones as her wrists yanked against the metal around them: all she felt was the burning of her lungs and vice grip on her heart as the girl's screams got louder and louder, the flames dancing against her body. Clarke didn't stop pulling at the chains or screaming, even once Nadia finally did.
"I'll kill you!" she howled, eyes burning into Nia as the queen turned back to her. Her voice turned harsh, her screams tearing her throat to shreds, but she didn't back down. "I will kill you for this!"
The queen stepped towards her again, and this time Clarke only pulled at her chains harder, her fingers clenching as they itched to close around the girl's throat. Nia stopped just a few inches short of the blonde girl, bending over just slightly as she met the hate-filled blue eyes.
"I will get what I want, Clarke," she said softly, her lips pulled up in a menacing sneer as she ignored the blonde's threat. "And when I do, Lexa and all those loyal to her will die. Only once you see the woman you care for dead before me will I allow you to die. Until then you will suffer." Clarke only screamed louder, pulled against her chains harder, her boots digging into the snow as she tried to close the space between them. Nia stood completely still, watching the Sky girl as she fought to get closer.
Smoke curled up towards the sky, the snap of the flames a constant white noise beneath Clarke's threats. The crowd still around them shifted nervously, many people fighting against their own tears or trying to keep their own fear in check. Nadia's mother clutched desperately at Sef, the volume of her grief turning down even as her body began to shake uncontrollably. Her father finally collapsed against Echo, all the fight draining out of him as his cries broke down into sobs, the warrior very nearly buckling beneath his dead weight until she managed to guide him to the ground, both falling on their knees. She dealt with her own grief in silence, and simply allowed her uncle to wail his own against her shoulder. Jojesh remained where he had fallen, his eyes glued to the post that continued to burn and the body that burned along with it. He had no tears, not at the moment, though his eyes burned as though they too had flames licking at them. Sef wailed, his cries for the mother that would never again hold him carrying through the air, and every person listening suddenly felt lumps form in their throats. Parents grabbed for their own children, holding them close while those old enough to understand what had just happened shook, and those too young simply cried because that's what everyone else was doing. Warriors stood stiff, tension coursing through their bodies as their eyes scanned over the crowd, seeing the way many of them stood, the way many of them looked at their queen, but Nia had eyes only for the raging blonde before her.
The wind picked up, carrying smoke and threats and grief with it, as well as the spirit of a young healer who had given her life doing what was right for her people.
/
Clarke kicked and screamed all the way back to her tower, cursed Nia, threatened her, swore she would kill her until her voice was all but gone, her throat torn to shreds almost as badly as her back. The warriors dragging her fought for every step they took, their fingers digging into her arms as they forced her through the crowds, forced her across the village, and finally managed to get her back into her cell. Somehow they successfully chained her once again to the walls, closing the manacles around both ankles and wrists, and even as they left the room and closed the door behind them they could still hear Wanheda screaming her revenge. When the door closed, those who could bolted, happy not to be the one left to stand guard, and the one who was felt a shiver run down his spine as the prisoner's shrieks continued to penetrate the walls and escape into the air around them. In her chains once again, Clarke yanked against them, throwing herself away from the wall as far as she could, tugging with all her strength to get free, but no amount of willpower would loosen any of the chains' hold on her. Finally she slumped forward, every ounce of strength rushing out of her, and she just sobbed. She sobbed for her injuries, her throbbing back that continued to bleed sluggishly, her wrists and ankles that were now torn up as well. She sobbed for Lexa and everything she would find when she finally made it to the village. She sobbed for the family that had just lost a loved one, the family who had been forced to stand there and watch it all happen without being able to do anything about it. She sobbed for Nadia, a girl who had so much love for her family and neighbors that she had knowingly risked her life and lost it in the most gruesome way imaginable, and she sobbed for everyone left behind who had no choice but to follow their queen or risk the same thing happening to them.
She was still sobbing what felt like hours later when the door opened again and a single person stepped inside, and she quickly fought to get control of herself. When she recognized the person, she just watched them as they made their way across the room, the door closing quickly behind them. She watched, her jaw clenched more in an attempt to rein in her emotions than anything else, and stood a little straighter, fighting not to wince as her back screamed at her when she moved.
"What do you want?" she managed to get out, her voice cracking and much deeper than usual due to her screams and grief. Jojesh didn't say anything, just continued to meet her eyes until he was close enough that very little space stood between them. He stopped, looked at her for a moment longer, and then slowly fell to one knee, his head turning down. The motion caused Clarke's eyes to widen in surprise, and she didn't even bother to try to wipe the shock from her face.
"For years, I have followed Nia," he murmured, his voice quiet even in the small space. "I have been loyal. I have followed my orders even when I knew they were against our ways, because she is my queen. I have done what was asked of me, and never questioned it. Every terrible plan, every dishonorable order, I have followed them because that is what I was supposed to do. I am a warrior: I follow my leader because that is the way it is supposed to be." His head lifted, his eyes meeting Clarke's, and she saw the anger burning inside them as his brow pulled down, his lips pursing. "No more," he continued, the strength in his voice growing with every word. "No longer do I follow the queen who cares only for herself. No longer will I follow her into a war that will do nothing but kill us all. I am a warrior, but my loyalties are first to my family, and today-." He had to stop for a moment, his voice getting thick, and when she looked again, Clarke could see how blood-shot his eyes were. "Today Nia killed my sister. After swearing to show mercy, she burned Nadia alive; in doing so, she also burned any bit of loyalty I had for her."
He scanned the blonde's face for a moment and Clarke just watched him, each seeming to size the other up. When their eyes met again, the warrior continued, "Nadia trusted you. She had faith in you, believed in you. She saw a strength in you and thought it was what would save us all." Jojesh scanned her face again and then said honestly, "I do not know if you can save us. I do not know if you possess this strength that my sister saw or if you can truly be trusted. What I do know is that you are the only one who has been able to stand up to Nia this long. You have held up against her torture and mind tricks when no one else could. You show a loyalty to the Commander that I have not seen before. You are smart: even from the moment we captured you, you were planning how to get away or how to leave a trail to be followed. Even with Maloch taunting you, you did not stop thinking and instead used what was around you to your advantage."
"So you did see me," Clarke interrupted, confirming what she had been afraid of that moment in the cave when she turned around and he had been standing right there. "You saw me get the chalk." After a second, he nodded. "Why didn't you say anything?" she asked, confusion and curiosity clear in her tone. He frowned for a second, as though he were thinking about the question, but when he looked back at her he seemed sure of his words as he answered, "Because kidnapping someone is not the way to fight a war. Nia wants the Commander's power, but she is too afraid to challenge her and demand what she believes is her birthright. She fears fighting Lexa, aware that she may not be strong enough to defeat her in single combat as the laws say, so instead she captures those closest to her in order to try to find a weakness she can use to her advantage. She wants the power but not the danger taking it requires, and that is the coward's way of fighting. I did what I was ordered to do and brought you to her, but no more than that. Now I am done even doing that." He lowered his head again, his eyes closing as he swore, "Klark kom Skaikru, Wanheda, I swear my loyalty to you. From now until my fight is over, my sword is yours."
The blonde's jaw fell open just a bit before she could stop it, his words surprising her even further. Twenty-four hours ago she never would have thought anything even resembling this moment would happen, but that had been before Nia killed his sister. Looking at him now, Clarke realized just how big a mistake the queen had made. Thinking about Nadia, her heart squeezed in her chest, and her jaw clenched. Nia would pay for what she had done, and maybe Jojesh was the only person she would need to make sure of it.
"Get up," Clarke told him, her voice firm, and slowly the warrior rose to his feet, his eyes still turned down. "Look at me." Jojesh did as he was ordered, his eyes once again meeting hers, and when they did he scanned them, reading the determination in them. "Don't ever kneel in front of me again, Jojesh," she said. "You are a warrior: stand up straight and proud." As though her words pulled on a string attached to his spine, he straightened, his shoulders squaring and chin lifting higher. Seeing the shift, Clarke nodded, her facial expression softening ever so slightly. "Joujesh kom Azgeda, I accept your sworn loyalty, and I return it. Help me, and I will do everything I can to help protect you and your family. Help me, and together we will take down Nia. Help me, and I swear to get justice for Nadia."
Fingers curling into fists down at his sides, the warrior's eyes flashed at the mention of his sister, and stiffly he nodded. Eyes flickering to the chains holding her back, he informed her, "I can get a key and release you now, if you wish." Quickly the blonde shook her head, fear momentarily gripping at her insides.
"No," she told him, "No, if you let me out right now we won't have a chance against her. We need to wait until there's a good enough distraction or the same thing that just happened will happen again."
"Very well," he replied, giving a simple nod. His eyes moved to the blood around her wrists from where she'd pulled too hard against her restraints and then added, "I will get you something for your wounds then." Pain flashed across his face but his voice remained strong as he said, "I am not a healer like Nadia, but I know of some herbs that will help." The same pain tore at Clarke's gut, causing the lump to rise back up in her throat, but she fought to hold it back.
"Thank you," she said to him, her voice as clear as she could make it. He nodded and then turned around and began to walk towards the door again. Seeing it, the blonde's eyes widened, a new thought coming to her. "Wait," she called out, and Jojesh turned to look at her, raising his eyebrows. "There has to be a guard out there," she told him. "What are you going to tell him? Won't he be suspicious you were in here after what just happened?"
"He is a friend," Jojesh informed her, looking back towards the door. "He will say nothing." He paused for a moment, as though that's all he was going to say, and then he added quietly, "I am not the only one who has become tired of Nia's reign." He didn't turn back around and so couldn't see the way Clarke's brow turned down at his words, and then he continued towards the door. A moment later it opened and he stepped out, pulling the door shut behind him as he left the room.
Even when she was once again alone, the Sky girl's brow remained drawn, his words ringing in her head along with new thoughts that were only just now beginning to form. In the dark of her prison cell, Clarke let those thoughts fester, let them grow until she could begin to piece them together, and the picture that started to come together managed to push her pain and grief away, if only for the moment. She stood still, letting the picture continue to grow, and felt the hairs on her arm begin to stand on end. There was no way to know if it would work, but Clarke knew she had to try it: it was what Nadia would have wanted, what she had promised her, and so she would do it. She would do it, even if there was a good chance it would kill her.
That hurt so much to write. I love Nadia so much, that just hurt.
As always, thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed, as much as one can "enjoy" a chapter like this. Just as a heads up, I want to let you know that there is a chance I might be a little late in updating next week: I think the next chapter is going to be a long one (shit's about to get real), and I'm going away this weekend, so won't have the usual amount of time to write. So it is possible that I might not be able to update until Thursday, but I am going to try very hard to stick to my usual schedule, and if I absolutely can't then I am determined to update by Thursday night at the very latest! If that happens, I'm sorry, I know that extra 24 hours might be agony for some of you, but I will do my best! Thanks all!
Trigedasleng Translations:
"Nono" - "Mama"
"Ai Unbroukai op!" - "See the Unbroken!"