Chapter 33

The Show Must Go On

Disclaimer: I don't own GG
Background: takes place in the episode where Lorelai is gone for the weekend and Rory eats in her house with Jess and Paris, which is when Dean comes, Jess leaves and they start fighting. All starts going down after that.
Warning: Some chapters may be really triggering.

1.

Finally, there were no more tears. Rory dried her face, exhausted. She wasn't sure what to say next, except to keep apologizing. As if she knew, Sookie shook her head.

"Don't. You have to feel how you feel, don't hide."

"Sookie...what happened next?"

"Are you sure...?"

"Yes. Please."

"The next morning I went back to work. I hadn't decided what to do yet- talk to him, maybe? I had gotten into a fight with my parents over how late I had gone home, and I couldn't tell them. When I went to work, there was gossip. Everyone knew about us. Except, they didn't know. He had told someone that I made a move on him, and he 'went along with it'. That he made a mistake, but I had been the one trying to seduce him. After all the joking around about his good looks, the women I worked with didn't find it as such a stretch. Before I knew it everyone thought I had seduced him into sleeping with me and I was labeled easy. Women were talking behind my back, men were trying to get with me. Who would have believed me if I told the truth?"

"Oh, Sookie..." Rory's heart was breaking thinking of what Sookie was going through. And then she realized it was getting dark outside. She hadn't noticed for a while, time and place had kind of melted together. She jumped up, startled. "Oh no, no no no, no."

"Rory, what's wrong?"

"The play, Sookie, I can't miss the play! It's for homework, I can't miss it. And I ...I needed time before it starts, I needed to see ...I can't..."

"Breathe! You still have time, let's go, you'll be fine."

"But your story..."

"Will still be here after the play. I'm fine, I promise."

2.

The play came and was gone in a blink. There was something soothing about getting ready for it. Sookie was right, despite all her worry, Rory had read everything and knew it by heart. It was Romeo and Juliette, after all, and she must have read it a dozen times since she was little. The ritual calmed her. The people from the town gathering in Miss Patty's studio, putting on the makeup and the costume. For a moment, she felt in character, and even the scene at the end where Tristan had to kiss her passed by fast and much easier than last time. For a moment, she had forgotten to worry. Being on stage was something she never thought she would like, but there was something appealing about it. Something that made her forget about her worries for a moment. When everyone was clapping at the end, she felt a rush of energy and happiness. She saw her mom and Sookie in the audience, and Jackson. Luke was there, and Bebet, and miss Patty. Even Jess was there in the corner and gave her an encouraging smile, which warmed her more than anything, knowing his aversion to such events. He was there for her.

Finally, it was over. She went to the back to remove her make up and change clothes. Tristan waited in front, wanting to check on how she felt, after everything she had been worried about. He leaned on the wall, deep in thoughts, when a short Asian girl with glasses tumbled right into him in hurry.

"Hey, be careful."

"Sorry, sorry. I wanted to talk to Rory."

"Yeah, join the line."

"Who are you?"

"Well, who are you?"

"I'm her best friend."

"Oh, Lane. I've heard a lot about you. I'm Tristan." He outstretched his hand to shake Lane's, but she didn't reciprocate, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"I've heard a lot about you too. I'm surprised you learned my name. How long did it take you to learn hers?"

"Feisty, protective, I like it. Just so you know, we are both here for Rory, so maybe you should be nicer."

"First of all, whatever you're thinking, don't. I'm not stupid. And second, what do you mean exactly, here for her?"

"You know what...oh. I don't know what to tell you. Talk to your friend."

"What were you talking about."

"Nothing. I know nothing." He smiled widely at her and leaned closer. "Now, how about we talk about us." He had wanted to distract her from the topic at first, but he suddenly noticed how beautiful her eyes were, and the contrast of her pale skin to the black hair.

"I'm not like those girls that forget their words when you wink at them."

He opened his mouth, but then Rory finally appeared from the back.

"Rory!" they both said in unison and turned to look at her. She started laughing genuinely, for a first time in a while.

"Well, if this is not an odd picture. Hey guys. I see you've met."

"I need to talk to you, Rory."

"So do I, Mary."

"Okay?"

"In private."

"Sure."

3.

Lane was first, and they went back to where the costumes were and Rory had changed a minute ago. They sat on an old bench that was a prop for something. They could still see some of the crowd from there, but there were far enough to talk privately. Rory was looking down. She knew why her friend wanted to talk and had no desire to do so. She was her best friend, and she couldn't bear her opinion.

"Tristan said something, that we are both here for you, what did he mean Rory?"

"I ...I have no idea. You wanted to talk?" That sounded way too polite, stiff and weird. Rory started playing nervously with the knuckles of her hands. Something was preventing her from saying a word, even though she wished she could.

"I'm sorry I surprised you yesterday. I thought you wanted to see Dean."

"Oh. It's okay." Rory was sitting stiff, unable to control her reaction at the mention of his name.

"What happened? You were upset?"

"I'm fine."

"Rory...are you going to tell me already? Maybe at least so I don't make a fool of myself anymore and make any other surprises you don't like? What is it? Are you guys back together, do you miss him, what is happening?"

Rory made a face and looked away, holding back the tears. She shook her head. "I can't."

"But you told him, didn't you?"

"Lane..."

"I thought we were best friends."

"We are."

"So what can be so bad that you can't tell me? And you can tell him, why? Are you two dating or something?"

"What? No! Why would you even think that?"

"I'm sorry" Tristan had shown up as well. "I need to go soon. I just need 5 minutes."

"Fine, whatever. Talk to him if you think that helps you more. I have to go too."

"Lane!" Pleaded Rory, but Lane was already walking out.

"So, that's your famous best friend, huh?" contemplated Tristan, playing with his hair casually. "She confusing. Weird."

"Hey, careful!"

"No, I like it." He looked through the crowd outside in contemplation, concentrated in the direction in which Lane went.

"No. Nope. Don't even think about it."

He rolled his eyes with a slight smile. "I wasn't."

"Right. Like I don't know you. Don't hurt her, or I will take your eyes out with a spoon and..."

Tristan started laughing and put his hands up. "Take it easy. I won't hurt her." He laughed again, shaking his head, still looking at where Lane had been standing. Finally, he became serious again.

"You didn't tell her, did you." Rory looked away, and he sat down to her. Her body was stiff, but her knees were betraying her, trembling a little. "Why?"

"I can't."

"You told me, and you two are closer. So how?"

"I don't know. I don't know, okay!" she exploded. "I just can't. And you, you were pestering me. It just came out. I don't know. Sometimes I wish no one knew."

He sighed.

"I'm sorry about telling your mom."

"I know. You were just being a friend. Thank you." She finally looked at him and smiled slightly with warmth in her eyes. "You did the right thing."

"So what happens next?"

"I...I don't know yet."

"How do you feel...after the play? Do you want to tell me now what was the problem?" Rory's stomach lurched in a protest because she knew exactly what he was talking about.

"No...I...can't, because...people...and things...we're not...I can't..."

"Rory" He put his hand on hers to stop the trembling of her fingers, which had suddenly gone really cold. She looked away, embarrassed.

"I can't yet. Please, it's been a long day. Honestly, it's been a long week. I just can't talk about it right now."

"It's okay. I'm here you know."

"Thanks. I can really use that right now."

She smiled warmly, looking at the people in the crowd going away.

"Quite a day, indeed." Muttered she. Tristan's hand was still on hers when she noticed his eyes burning her from the other end of the room. Dean, his eyes darkened with the realization of what he was seeing, looking betrayed and hurt. Suddenly the whole picture in front of her started blurring and she felt faint and cold, everything moving further away from her, without really moving.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"Fine. I'm fine. Just..." She looked back at Tristan in shock and panic, but when she gazed back in the crowd, there was no one there. Her knees felt weak. "Sorry, I think I'm too tired. I'll see you at school?"

"Yeah. Call me if you need anything, okay?"

"Sure."

She kept staring at the crowd, but there was no one there.