Notes: Welcome, knaves and vagabonds, fruitcakes and nuts, boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen, to the smashing climax, and our seventh and final Battle Chapter! Who will triumph? Who will fall? Why am I using such a cheesy, dramatic tone? Aw, heck with it... Anyway, for those who want to know, Batman's appearance at the end of this chapter was inspired by the Ragebox power-ups from the McGee game.
Chapter XXXVI: Finale
Batman stared in a mixture of confusion, shock, and dumbstruck horror at the many faces of the Knave of Hearts. The mouth of the Dead-Bruce head opened up as the Knave let out a loud, cruel, maniacal cackle of laughter...so much like Joker's laugh, yet so unlike it.
As the laughter continued, the Heart Palace began to collapse around the creature, the Knave's laughter growing louder and louder Batman dodged left and right to avoid the falling stones, bricks, and bits of splintering wood as the Knave rose higher and higher, moving farther and farther away, vanishing into the darkened skies...
Suddenly, the area of stone Batman stood upon began to rise as well, up out of the ground, like a great pillar. Eight more pillars rose in a circle around the Knave, at varying heights, all the same width apart from each other.
Batman gazed up at the full form of the Knave of Hearts. The titan stood high in the air, wearing nothing but a tattered, sleeveless, bloodstained, plum-colored tunic with a leather belt, its buckle shaped like a silver heart surrounded by gold flames. The tunic had a long, vertical slash running down its front, from its chest to just above its belt, revealing chalky white, muscular skin. The creature wore a strange sort of headdress, like an overturned crescent lined in spikes that spouted founts of blood into the air.
The Knave had four white arms, two at its shoulders and two that stuck out from its tattered tunic right above the waist. Its upper left arm and lower right arm were both human in appearance, but had green spikes on the elbows and were tipped in long green claws. The lower one of these hands held a jeweled scepter, topped with a brassy skull wearing a jester's cap. The other held an immense blade, like a supersized machete. Its lower left arm and upper right arm had no hands at all, nor any spikes, and looked considerably bonier and more shriveled in comparison to the other two arms. The lower arm ended in a cannon, like that of an Automaton guard, but purple in color, decorated in olive-toned Suit symbols. The upper arm, meanwhile, had a large white crab claw in placement of a hand.
For a while, all Batman could do was stare.
"IMPRESSIVE, AM I NOT?"
The Knave cackled dementedly.
"...The Queen...?"
"MY PUPPET, YOU MEAN. I'VE ALWAYS LOVED PUPPETS! EVER SEEN A PUNCH AND JUDY SHOW, BATTY-MAN?"
As the Knave said this, he swung his scepter at Batman, who quickly jumped down to a pillar, lower than the one he stood on, directly to his left.
"Then...YOU are the cause of all this?"
"MOI? NO. DIDN'T YOU LISTEN? ALL THIS IS THE MESHED AND MELDED MIXTURE OF YOUR PAIN AND TETCH'S MADNESS. AND I? I AM THE KING! KING! KING!"
Here the Knave struck out again with its scepter. Batman ducked, and the scepter smashed the pillar to his right almost in half.
"I RULE WONDERLAND ALONE. YOUR EXISTENCE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED! THIS REALM IS FOR THE MAD: RAW, RUTHLESS, CAREENING OFF OF THE JAGGED EDGES OF MISERABLE REALITY. SELF-PITYING, HEROIC DREAMERS ARE NOT WELCOME HERE...THEY CANNOT SURVIVE HERE."
This time, the Knave chose to use its machete, slicing the pillar almost three quarters of the way down in two with one vertical slice.
Batman edged back, holding the Jabberwock's Eyestaff in one hand tightly...so tightly, his palms sweat inside his gloves.
"But I have. I defeated your guardian, your scientist, your Chessmen, and your insectoid overlord. And I intend to defeat you."
Knowing it most likely wouldn't do much good, he reached for a bat-o-rang – his last bat-o-rang – and tossed it upwards.
The Knave grabbed the bat-o-rang in his crab claw, crushing it in an instant.
"A MINOR DETAIL. SORT OF LIKE THE FACT THAT YOUR HEART STILL BEATS, HM?"
The Knave aimed its cannon. What appeared to be a skull, surrounded by purple flames shot out. Batman aimed the Eyestaff and fired it at the oncoming projectile, shattering it and sending bits of charred "bone" everywhere.
"A minor detail that holds the Jabberwock's Eyestaff."
"YOU STUPID LITTLE FLY BOY! THAT PITIFUL TRINKET ALONE DOES NOT HAVE THE POWER TO DESTROY ME, ANYMORE THAN YOU DO! YOU FEAR THE TRUTH. YOU LIVE IN SHADOWS. YOU RUN FROM THE PAST."
The Knave fired its cannon again and again. Batman jumped to the next pillar, and then the next after that. As he touched down on the third, he flung an explosive capsule at the Knave of Hearts.
The monster didn't even flinch.
But it did laugh.
A lot.
"WAS THAT SUPPOSED TO HURT LIL' OL' ME?"
The Knave cackled and stabbed machete into the pillar. The stone step crumbled, and Batman barely managed to jump to the next, catching its edge. He heaved himself up, narrowly missing the Knave's scepter as it tried to knock him down.
He aimed the Eyestaff at the monster's chest, and fired.
And fired.
And...fired...?
Nothing.
Nothing but the Knave's laughter.
"HA! STOP! STOP IT! THAT TICKLES! HA HA HA HA!"
...No...
Not after all I've been through...
The Knave of Hearts let out a deep, wolf-like snarl, and lunged with its blade. Batman jumped away, down onto the next pillar, just in time to avoid its edge...
Almost, anyway, as the gigantic machete cut at his cape, sending scorched and shredded cloth fluttering down, back to the ground fifty feet below him.
"Why won't it work...?"
"GIVE UP!" the Knave of Hearts bellowed, pointing dramatically with his scepter. "YOUR PATHETIC ATTEMPTS TO DESTROY ME AND SAVE THOSE YOU CARE FOR MOST HAVE FAILED. RETREAT INTO THE STERILE SAFETY OF YOUR SELF-DELUSIONS...OR FACE INEVITABLE ANNIHILATION. FOR IF YOU DESTROY ME...YOU DESTROY YOURSELF!"
Batman glared up, silent. The gruesome smiles of the Knave's four heads mocked him.
"THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE, BAT-BOY: SURRENDER, AND SOME HOLLOW PART OF YOU, AT LEAST, JUST MIGHT REMAIN. REFUSE, AND I WILL BREAK. YOU. DOWN. YOU WILL LOSE YOURSELF FOREVER!"
From somewhere, deep inside of Batman's chest, came a small, biting grub of doubt and uncertainty...a grub that had been teased constantly throughout his journey.
But it was shadowed by thoughts of the White Rabbit.
It was shadowed by thoughts of the Gryphon.
It was shadowed by thoughts of the Mad Hatter.
It was shadowed by thoughts of the March Hare and the Dormouse.
It was shadowed by thoughts of the Gnomes.
It was shadowed by thoughts of the Cheshire Cat.
Most of all, it was shadowed by thoughts of his parents, and of Jason.
And of Tim.
"Never."
The Knave's eyes widened. All four heads frowned, confused. He lowered his scepter.
"...COME AGAIN?"
"Never. I will never surrender...and I will NOT allow this nightmare to continue."
With these words, he fired the Eyestaff again, aiming at the hand that held the scepter.
The Knave let out a yelp of pain, the superheated light finally inflicting a large, searing burn across its skin. It then roared, and grabbed onto Batman with its crab claw, hissing like a python as the tight, crusty grip squeezed its prey tightly, pinning the Dark Knight's arms, and, thus, the Eyestaff, down.
"THEN DIE."
The Knave of Hearts raised Batman up, leveling him with the slash in his tunic.
The Knave's torso opened up, revealing a gaping, red maw, lined with shark-like teeth in at least five rows...
And tossed Batman in. The maw closed.
There was silence for a while.
The Knave burped.
"HM. COULD HAVE USED SAUCE-"
BANG!
The Knave of Hearts let out a horrid scream, a hole blasting open in its torso.
Out of the hole came Batman...
But it was not the same one that had gone in.
This Batman had no cape, but great, black wings with a red membrane. He had fangs, and fiery red eyes. Claws could be seen in his gloves, and the Eyestaff he held now had a scythe-shaped blade attached to it, and the staff itself was studded with rubies. His whole form seemed to be surrounded by a red mist, and the bat-insignia on his chest was now surrounded by a red oval rather than a yellow one.
Batman glowered at the Knave of Hearts.
The monster glared back, seemingly unaffected by his opponent's new form and the wound in his chest.
"OW."
The Knave lashed out with his pincer. With infinite Grace, the Dark Knight avoided the attack, and fired a blast at the right eye of the Knave's Scarecrow-Head. The Knave growled in anger and pain, the eye melting into a blackened, charred pool.
"I'LL KILL YOU!"
"I don't think so."
The Knave fired its cannon. The Eyestaff shattered the skull, and the beam kept on going, straight at the Knave's blood-spitting headdress, which was blown into shrapnel.
The Knave shrieked in fury, raising his blade over his head. Batman raised the Eyestaff over his, the scythe-like edge glinting off the dim Wonderland sunlight, and flew at his enemy.
"NOW..."
"OFF..."
"WITH..."
"YOUR..."
The Knave of Hearts and the Dark Knight finished at the same time: "HEAD!"
A hideous scream.
A flash of light.
Then came a sense of being lifted...
up, Up, UP...