A/N- Just a reminder, SVM belong to CH, I'm just having fun with them.
Thank you to everyone for your support and to Charhamblin, my fantastic beta!
-This chapter is split into two sections. Sookie's first few bits are relatively heavy in symbolism and foreshadowing. Actually, much of the future of the story is laid out here in cryptic terms. You probably won't be able to make much of it now, but it's important and you might be able to make some good guesses...
I've changed my profile picture to something that I mention in this chapter. This website cuts some of the photo out so the full picture is on my relatively neglected wordpress site, Choices2make. I liked it so much for this purpose, I purchased the rights to use it from istockphoto.
o-o-o-o
Chapter 36
Take Better Care
E~
In bed at headquarters.
Silence.
Covers tucked up to my chest. Naked. Room temperature.
Myself. Sookie. Pam. Lasagna.
Pam starting to stir. Sookie…
My eyes opened. I took a deliberate breath of air. Sookie's scent was old, not as old as Pam's but she had not been in this room for about twelve hours. I listened deliberately and could hear Pam stirring in her bedroom, but there was no hint of Sookie. I sat upright and looked at the clock. 6:51 pm. It would be 1:51 pm in Hawaii.
If that's where she went.
I rolled over onto my side and sat up, feeling the restraining weight of daylight slowly fall off me. My pants were still on the floor where I'd left them, a clear sign that Sookie had not been here. I reached down, picked up the pants and removed my phone from the front pocket where I'd left it.
Fuck.
I'd been too tired to plug it in and now the damn thing was dead. I had fully embraced technology, but I hated when it failed me because it reminded me that I was becoming dependent on something that was out of my control. I also hated it because it gave my enemies the same capabilities I had and perhaps even more, depending on the experts they had in their employ.
Fully awake now, I stood up and walked out of the bedroom, smelling the air as I went. Sookie's scent was stronger here, but only slightly so. I entered her rooms and was warmed immediately by the intensity of her essence here.
I smiled. She had done as she'd promised and waited until sunrise in Hawaii to leave here. A little tension in my chest resolved. It's not that I didn't trust her to keep her word; it's just that I'm not used to being out of control and having her leave here and go 'who knows where,' tested my restraint to new levels. If she didn't need to leave for her health, I don't believe that I would have the strength to let her go. But I'd seen her connection with the earth and the elements and felt it through the dream. She needed to be outside and I needed to let her go, and so I did.
Her scent was strongest by her desk, on the chair, computer and the papers spread out on the desktop. I was pleased to see that she had indeed been busy working on designing her rooms.
I followed her scent to the closet and found that she'd left her dirty clothes in the hamper. The only other area in the closet that she had touched was the shelf that held bathing suits Miriam had purchased for her. It was clear from the absence of one of the organized piles, that she'd selected one to wear. Had she left with nothing on but a bathing suit? Since no other areas in the closet had been disturbed, it was probable that she had. Although the thought turned me on, I didn't like the idea of her being so far away dressed in only a tiny bikini, but if she'd teleported directly to her inlet in Hana, there really hadn't been a reason for her to wear anything else.
I glanced at the clock as I walked from the room, 6:55.
Upon entering my office, I plugged in the useless phone and I couldn't stop the smile that crossed my lips when I glanced at my desk and saw that it was clear of the usual piles of paperwork that constantly harassed me. Paperwork had always irritated me as sheriff and now as king, even though I had many others to help me. We'd even managed to switch much over to be handled on the computer but I was still inundated with piles of the stuff.
For the next few nights however, I would be able to avoid it, and without the stacks of papers calling to me, I could enjoy my office. This room was one of the reasons I hoped Sookie would grasp onto the idea of decorating her space. I knew she had a lot on her mind and taking a few hours to do something for herself, something frivolous, might give her a tiny break from all the tension and worry she carried with her. The process had certainly helped me.
I'd allowed Pam and Miriam, with the help of the decorators to take care of all the rooms in the building with the exception of my private spaces which I wanted to do on my own. I'd most enjoyed designing this office and the 'playroom,' as Pam had called it, that I'd moved upstairs up so Sookie could have her own space here with me.
Our private rooms were the only spaces in the secured parts of the building that we allowed real wood and I relished it. Although little exists from the time, certain wood tables and chairs reminded me of my people and my time and I found it relaxing. The custom built-in bookcase shelves were made of mahogany wood that I'd had cut exactly to my measurements and Pam and I had installed it on our own. I liked that most everything in this space was built, painted, arranged and cleaned by our hands. It made something truly ours in a sea of needy and greedy hands always reaching, seemingly trying to pull off a piece of us.
I didn't keep my personal library here; I treasured the books too much to risk having them in such a high profile space as this. Those books, most of them irreplaceable, were in my most secure safe house, the first one I would show to Sookie once Maeve could get it warded successfully and the one I hoped she would consent to live in with me.
Even though most of my treasured volumes were in my home, I still had every inch of two walls filled with books that I referenced regularly. Here I collected books about business ownership, management, Louisiana's history, electronics, human, vampire and shifter laws and traditions, Fellowship of the Sun, finances and many others, covering every topic I needed to master as king.
The wall that I faced when seated at my desk took the place of windows and had three large photographs on it. Two were new within the last year and replaced the more somber paintings I'd selected when I first decorated this space. These new photographs were abstract black and white renderings of the engine and the steering wheel and front dash of my beloved corvette. I'd had to put the car in storage when I became king, so this was my only way of vicariously enjoying it.
The center painting was one Pam had selected for me. She called it motivational art. At first glance it might look like a tree in fall, with bright red trunks and branches reaching into a black sky. It truly was a striking sight, but it was not what it appeared to be at first glance.
Pam actually had to explain its significance to me when she delivered it. Thanks to modern technology, I now had a very stirring 3D picture of human blood vessels, bright red with healthy, oxygenated blood pumping through their walls. Pam had selected it for me in hopes that it would inspire me to fuck and feed. And honestly, it worked…not by making me hungry. I was already hungry. All the time. This picture separated the person from the blood for me and in my state of mind at that time, I needed to be able to close my eyes and see only blood vessels, willingly offering up their bounty to me.
It was the only way I could get myself to drink from a donor without being dragged back down into the morass of my unwelcome emotions.
Speaking of feeding, I was hungry. Glancing at the clock, 7:01, I went to my desk and opened the bottom left drawer, which housed the charging station for all my backup electronics. At all times, I had at least three extra phones, connected to the same number, charging and ready for use. I had learned the hard way that waiting to get a new phone caused more trouble than being prepared and I was hard on my electronics, so these reserves were frequently used. Of course I also had stashes of phones tied to other numbers as well as prepaid phones, but that wasn't what I needed now.
I pulled out and disconnected another black iPhone and powered it up.
No messages.
Should I call her? I didn't want to make her think I didn't trust her, but I'd expected to wake with her in my bed. Maybe she fell asleep on the beach or maybe she's enjoying some time with her friends. I tried to tell myself these things, but of course, anxiety started to creep into my chest as I began to wonder where she was.
I'd give her ten more minutes before I called her.
I walked back into the sitting room and opened the refrigerator that was designed to look like a cabinet and removed a bag of blood. I was becoming more and more resistant to the call of Sookie's blood, but I needed to keep myself well fed so there was no chance that I would lose control.
Last night had been close. I was already lost to my desire for her after watching her battle and defeat two of the most skilled warriors in my kingdom and then fight hand to hand with Sheila. Then she surprised me by slicing her own skin. My fangs ran out and I grew hard at the mere memory of the sensual sight she made, poised above me, eyes heavy with desire, hands running though her hair and over her breasts while blood flowed freely down her naked torso, creating bright red rivulets as it traversed the contours of her body.
If I ever thought the picture of the blood vessels in my office was a motivator I was horribly misled. Watching blood flow freely down Sookie's naked and flushed body as she straddled my chest was the most sensual thing I'd ever seen. It was simply the fact that I was so in awe of her that kept me from losing myself in my blood lust.
I shook my head to clear my thoughts as I punctured the collection bag and squeezed the thick blood into a glass and warmed it in the microwave I kept in the cabinet above the small refrigerator. Pam arrived as I was finishing the last drops in the glass.
"What's wrong?" she asked, cutting to the chase as she helped herself to my stores of blood.
I shrugged, "Probably nothing," I said, but the words sounded hollow to my ears. "Sookie's late in returning from Hawaii."
Pam froze and kept her eyes on the microwave, "She was due back at sunset?" I didn't respond, why bother when she knew the answer. She took my silence as confirmation. "Did you call her?"
I sat down in my chair, "No, not yet." She turned and frowned at me; I wasn't usually patient when people were late. Actually people weren't usually late when coming to see me.
My eyes were drawn back to the phone every few seconds as though a message from her could have somehow magically appeared on the screen, but it was blank. I checked the volume and the alerts and set each at the highest level.
"Well, call her," Pam said as though I were stupid. I pressed my lips together. This was Sookie. Things had always been different with Sookie. I'd always had to handle her differently, and I was aware that I would have to make even more adjustments to my normal responses than ever before. I had promised to give her freedom and to trust her abilities and her judgment.
I sat back in the chair. 7:06. I'd give her five more minutes. Pam glared at me from her perch on the armrest of the couch as she drank her blood and I ignored her as best I could while checking the weather in Hana. 84 and partly cloudy. I Google mapped the Hotel Hana on my phone and then zoomed in on the inlet, willing her to appear on the beach. I found the beach and could see the rock outcropping where we had sat together but of course the photo was probably taken months, if not years ago.
7:10. I scrolled to her cell number and pressed send. I didn't give a fuck that it was one minute early.
Pam stood up and I closed my eyes, trying to hold myself together when Sookie's phone rang in her room. I waited to open my eyes until Pam returned with the phone. "It was under papers on her desk," she said quietly. I took the offending device from her hand, ended the call and then placed both phones on the coffee table before I succumbed to my desire and destroyed them.
"Why wouldn't she take it with her?" Pam asked. I didn't have a fucking clue and Pam knew better than to ask such asinine questions. I couldn't answer her or even summon the will to growl at her, all I could do was stare at the fucking thing.
The bond was gone, so I couldn't feel her. The mental connection I'd grown to love so much was closed between us so I couldn't hear her and probably wouldn't even be able to anyway since she had gone so far away. At least I thought she had. There was no way for me to know where she had actually gone. What if she'd decided to meet up with Niall? It would be like him to contact her somehow and try to lure her out, and she would probably go, especially if he threatened someone she loved.
Fuck.
Flipping through my contacts, I used my phone to call her brother. He and his family were the only ones I could see Niall using against Sookie since Hunter was safe in Britlin. Jason's, "No, duh," response to my warnings about staying away from fairies confirmed for me that all was as well as it ever was in his household.
I tossed down my phone, grabbed her's again and scrolled through the call log. She'd spoken to my designer twice, Jason once and had called five unknown numbers. I checked each number and as expected, was connected to various stores or galleries. Her received call log was empty except for my number. The Internet history was just as predictable with the exception of her visiting a site designed by the 'adoring' fangbanger fans of Thalia.
My eyes were drawn up to the painting Sookie had admired last night and I could almost feel her shoulders under my fingers, her hands over mine, the heat of her body enveloping and warming my hands…
"Eric," Pam's tense voice broke me from my extended reverie in which I was reliving every minute I'd had with Sookie last night. I blinked and looked at her. "She's over an hour late, we're going to have to do something. Maybe Maeve can do a locator spell on her."
Yes. I stood up and sent Maeve a text, relieved to have a plan of action to keep me moving. Pam and I were dressed and in Maeve's office within three minutes. It looked like anyone else's office; she kept her magical devices and ingredients in her workroom in her residence on the next floor.
She greeted us as we walked in, "I think I've found a way to do the wards on all of the buildings you wanted without using so much of Sookie's blood," she said excitedly and then her smile faded when she took a good look at our expressions. "What's wrong?"
Pam answered her, "Sookie has not returned from her daytime trip to Hawaii. She was due back at sunset." Maeve gave Pam a confused look but her eyes flicked to mine briefly, her expression fearful.
I ground my teeth together and spoke through a tense jaw, "You will do a locator spell on her right now." I told her this, not willing to form it into a request as I usually tried to do with her, in case she were to tell me that she couldn't perform it.
I was relieved when her eyes flashed with the challenge of the task set out before her. "Yeah. Okay. I have everything I need upstairs, all I need for you to get is one of her hairs, an eyelash, a drop of blood, anything from her body."
I turned and sped back to my quarters. I searched in the bathroom for a brush, but it was brand new and I couldn't find any hairs on her desk chair or in my bed. Desperate now, I unlocked and then forced the door to my hideaway and propped it open with a small suitcase and then flew down into the bathroom below. I knew she had used the brush down here multiple times, I had even brushed her hair myself.
I found the brush in the top right drawer of the vanity and sighed with relief when I saw numerous long blond strands entwined in the bristles. I retraced my steps and was back in Maeve's office within seven minutes of leaving.
Maeve was still upstairs gathering her supplies with Pam's help and the two returned with candles, some water in a flask, a large glass bowl, a bundle of herbs and a spell book. As I had seen her do many times before, she pulled up the rug on the far side of the room revealing a circle drawn on the floor with symbols at four points that identified the demarcation of the cardinal headings, north, south, east and west.
Her eyes were already darker than normal and both Pam and I knew to remain silent unless she required our input or assistance. She held out her hand so I gave her the brush and watched as she wound her fingers through the bristles and formed a fist around the strands. Her eyes closed and she began to chant under her breath.
After a few minutes, she became silent and then opened her eyes. I knew something was wrong right away. "These are your hairs, just yours," she said and I was out the door and back in my rooms in a minute. I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath, trying frantically to find any remaining part of her. I caught the scent immediately, I'm not sure how I missed it earlier.
I sped to the garbage can in the bedroom and to my relief, found our shredded clothing from last night. I flung mine aside after smelling them and actually smiled when I found a smeared spot of her blood on a piece of her shirt. Closing my eyes, I breathed in her scent deeply. She entered through my nose, went into my lungs and then filtered through my cells, stripping me bare and leaving me aching. I was nearly knocked over by the cold terror that gripped my chest and had me reaching out to support myself on the wall.
Where was she? What had happened? What if I couldn't find her? Was she in pain? Scared? Flashbacks from sixteen years ago haunted me, tortured me...
Pam came into the room and I realized that I had been standing, unmoving, my hand against the wall, the remains of the shirt hanging at my side in my limp fingers. Pam didn't make eye contact as she gently removed the material from my hand, "I'll take this to her," she said quietly and started to walk away.
"I'm losing time again," I whispered.
She turned around, "I'm aware of that. I'll keep an eye on you. It won't get out of hand this time. It was so bad last time because it was part of the damage caused by the breaking of the bond, you know that. Doctor Ludwig confirmed it. You're just worried now." she said firmly. "Stay here, have more blood, then sit down and develop a plan. I'll stay with Maeve and then return to you when she finishes, but she says that it may take a few hours."
I nodded my gratitude and then she was gone. I did not follow. I did not get more blood. Instead, I wandered aimlessly into my bedroom and collapsed onto my bed. In here I could surround myself in her scent, not thinking, not moving, simply holding onto the edge of the cliff with the bare tips of my fingers, knowing that if I were to let go, I would tumble back into the abyss of despair from which I had just emerged.
At some point, I received a nudge from Pam through the bond and I sat up. I knew that I should be acting, but most pathways I followed simply exposed her to more danger if she were, in fact alright, but just distracted. There were a few steps I could and would take. I sent a text to my pilot and told her to be ready to leave for Hawaii at one o'clock AM. That would get me to Maui well before sunset there and I would have time to try and follow her trail. I texted Pam our travel plans, I didn't even think of going without her, this time I could readily admit that I needed her.
I called the Queen of Hawaii and informed her of our impending visit, claiming continuing fairy issues as my reason for coming. It wasn't a complete lie and if questioned, I had the Pythonesse's very recent support of my work to keep others from questioning my actions too much.
I also made overnight arrangements at a hotel in Lahaina to throw off anyone who might be following me and at the Hotel Hana for Pam and I under aliases so we would have somewhere to go if our investigation took too long. Then I just waited. I could feel the magic through the walls and so I didn't dare go to Maeve in case I were to disturb her work.
After another hour passed, I had to do something more, "Fuck it," I growled as I scrolled through my contacts and called Alcide.
"I heard you were on vacation," he said in greeting.
I ignored him, "I need your help contacting a Were in the town of Hana on the island of Maui."
Alcide was silent for a moment and then spoke, "For what purposes?"
Years ago, I would have become angry with him for questioning me but we had worked together for so long, I no longer assumed that he would try to block or irritate me just for sport or simply because he's a Were and I am vampire. Instead I answered him as honestly as I was willing, "One of my primary team has gone missing," I answered.
"Sheila?" he asked, his voice rising with concern.
"No, a new member," I said simply. "She should have been in contact at sunset our time, but I have heard nothing. I am…concerned."
"Give me the name of that town again and of her last known location. I'll make some calls and get right back to you," he said.
Typically I simply hung up after dispensing the necessary information, but I felt the need to say more. "I owe you Alcide," I said, binding myself to assisting him in the future. It hardly mattered since we worked together so much anyway, but saying it out loud let him know how very important this task was to me.
Within twenty minutes, my phone rang again, "I'm in contact with a lone Were from Hana, he's willing to help, and knows the area but he's about an hour away from the town. Tell me what he's looking for and he'll go straight there when he arrives. I heard my phone groan and relaxed my fingers just before I crushed it in my hand.
An hour. A fucking hour. I looked at the clock and was shocked to see that it was already eleven. She should have been here four hours ago. I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to keep my cool and I managed to force a few words from my mouth, "She looks and smells somewhat like a fairy and has long blond hair. She was probably wearing a bathing suit."
Alcide was writing down the description, "But I thought fairies couldn't…"
I cut him off, "Just tell him to find her," I said through clenched teeth and then I did hang up on him.
I climbed out of the bed, her scent was no longer comforting, now it was taunting me and starting to drive me crazy. I paced the sitting room, watching the minutes tick by and finally I felt the magic cease, Pam was on her way here. She was blocking her emotions from me, so I steeled myself for what she would tell me.
My child entered the room and I sat down on my chair, unable to remain standing any longer. "Maeve did everything she could. Sookie's blood simply won't respond to the magic of the locator spell." I opened my mouth to ask her what that meant, but she held up her hand and continued, "That doesn't mean anything. Vampires can't be found with the spell either. It doesn't mean anything Eric," she said but her words were just white noise to me. The spell didn't work on vampires because we're dead.
Five hours.
Pam busied herself packing our bags for the trip to Hawaii, I was grateful to her for handling this. I'd taken one final step with telling Maeve to begin the long process of contacting the Britlingens. I would have them ask Hunter about Sookie. If Sookie could feel that Hunter was well, then Hunter surely would be able to feel her.
Now that I had done everything I could think of that wouldn't make the situation worse, I was unable to do anything else but sit there in my chair, holding my head in my hands and stare at the floor.
My phone finally rang and Pam answered it. I could hear that it was Alcide, but I ignored his side of the conversation. From Pam's responses, the Were had arrived at the hotel and was on his way down to the beach. Suddenly I was hit by a wave of relief from Pam and she said, "Oh...you fucking fairy. Never mind. Call him off…yes." Then there was silence except for the tapping of Pam's toe on the hardwood floor and the quiet thumping sound I had been dreaming of for hours.
0-0-0-0-0-0
S~
The minute my bare feet touched the sand of the inlet, I was hit by a wave of such unexpected and overwhelming relief, I sunk to the sand on my knees. Completely unable to control myself, I curled into a ball and trembled from a bone deep exhaustion I wasn't even aware of feeling as my body slowly begin absorbing strength and energy from the land around me.
The tide of energy began as a soft swell but I gasped and then cried out as the intensity continued to increase. I stretched full out on the sand of my isolated inlet, held my head in my hands and tried desperately to understand what was happening. The other times I had sought comfort here, I had been gifted with love and care from the elements and the healing I had received just a year ago was the polar opposite from what I was being pummeled with now. I just couldn't understand.
I tried to breathe slowly and to separate the sensations that were rocketing through my body, overwhelming my mind. At first I was unable to discern anything from the pounding mess, but with great effort and control, I isolated what I visualized as one fiber from the hundreds that made up the pressure in my head.
One at a time, I pulled each fiber away from the others, and realized that they weren't really fibers, but a silent yet deafening voice. Once I acknowledged and studied the voiceless message from each individual source, it became quiet and peaceful while the others raged on, awaiting my attention.
Slowly, I began to understand the message they were so eager to force upon me.
Whereas before, I had been embraced, lifted up and healed by the elements and by my 'akuas and aumakuas; I was now being not so much punished, as scolded by the same. It was the combined censure of the multitude of my forbearers and other sera fae that made up this noise and subsequent discomfort I was suffering.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, sure that they would hear me even if I didn't speak, but it helped me to say it out loud. "I'm sorry. I didn't understand. I thought I was the only one it would hurt. I didn't know."
I didn't know, but I should have. All of my teachers, from Pua to my martial arts and yoga instructors to the Britlingens, had taught me about the cycle of energy flow within nature. There is a rhythm to everything in life, I was acutely aware of that and of the fact that I was a part of it. Just as night must follow day, there must be a balance and a completion of a myriad of cycles for us to remain healthy and strong.
In my case, as this being that I am, I expend energy into the environment and then it is given back to me, passively and actively. It re-energizes me and heals me, thus negating or lessening my need for sleep and speeding my recovery from injuries. This cycle works best for me here in Hawaii or a similar land, and is stunted in Louisiana, but not halted. It wasn't my choice to reside in Louisiana that I was being punished for; it was my choice to cut myself off altogether from nature by remaining inside for so long.
I thought that I would only be hurting myself by agreeing to stay in the chamber with Eric, but that wasn't the case. It turns out that I had stolen my energy from my kin, living and past. I had broken my own energy cycle and had caused a glitch in an otherwise smoothly functioning synergistic relationship that I had with the other sera fae and the volcanic earth that we all depended upon.
I was an important component in this relationship and this greater cycle and it was my responsibility to do my part to keep the system flowing smoothly. That dependence on each part of the whole must be why I knew while in Britlin, and still know now, that Hunter was safe and well. I share his energy and he shares mine. So I guess that somewhere, we're sharing energy with our mysterious makua, just as I know we share energy with Haumea, the mother earth, her daughter Pele and the other gods and goddesses of the nature around us.
This connection didn't make me a goddess, far from it, but I was one piece in a cycle that began with Haumea creating Pele. I pictured it as a grouping of gears all turning together, some moving quickly and some slowly, depending on their size. All of them working in concert but individually. The gear next to ours belonged to the descendants of Namakaokaha'i and another to Poliahu, and the rest were made of the descendants from the other gods and goddesses and were still driven by their original energies and powers.
When I visualized this parallel between the types of fae, my heart broke for the war that raged between such similar bloodlines. Yes, we were unique from one another and as one line grew stronger, it affected the others, but adjustments could be made to adapt to that change. Just as a smaller gear can speed up or a larger one could slow down to keep pace with the unit, we could adjust. The entire gear didn't have to be removed to preserve the status quo that these silent voices were telling me so adamantly to maintain.
Long ago, I had asked Mr. Cataliades what I would owe the one who gave us the money that helped Hunter and I escape Louisiana and had been told that it was a gift freely given. I'd always assumed the same of the energies I accepted from nature, but I'd been wrong. That is not a gift freely given. There is a price to pay and that price is that I must return the energy, participate in the cycle, work to preserve myself and the whole.
I took a deep breath, relieved to see that with this understanding of my role in my larger community, the cacophony of complaints ceased to abuse my mind. Most of the strands became individual sources of energy that wrapped around me and gently began to replenish my exhausted body and mind. Although I was now aware of another responsibility I had to fulfill, it was a natural and comfortable role for me. I was happy to take a more active role in sharing the energies of my kind rather than simply taking it as I had been doing so far.
Satisfied that I had interpreted the messages the best way I could, I opened my eyes and screamed. Glaring down at me was a face I had never wanted to see again. Pele's son stood feet away on the volcanic rock outcroppings and I knew, just as I had known the day I first met him on Oahu, that he would kill me if Pele would allow it.
Through my terror, I saw the sun break though a thin cloud and the water called to me, lapping at my toes, and I found I was able to make my way down the beach into the shallow lagoon where somehow, I knew he would not follow. I watched, my breath tumbling from my mouth and limbs shaking as he was absorbed into the rocks around him and he left me in peace.
I covered my face with my hands and sunk beneath the water where I divested myself of my bikini top, needing to feel the water on more of my body. I stayed in the water until I was chilled and then returned to the beach, where I collapsed face down onto the warm sand and fell asleep with the glorious warmth and safety of the sun beating down on me.
0-0-0-0
A cloud passed in front of the sun, casting me in shadow and even though I was dry, I shivered. I rolled over and glanced up at the sun to see how long it would be obscured by the cloud.
Shit!
I sat bolt upright, gasping. There was no sun at all, only a dimly lit sky with thick gray clouds and a few remaining pink fingers of color threading through the horizon.
Horror gripped me. I had promised Eric that I would be back over five hours ago. He would be frantic. I jumped up, ignoring the fact that I was naked except for my bikini bottoms and the sand that covered most of my body, and I felt for Eric. I found him easily and teleported directly to his side.
Eric and Pam were in his bedroom. Pam was standing near the door with a cellphone to her ear and Eric was seated in his chair with his back bowed and his head held in his hands. His hair blocked his vision so it was Pam who saw me first.
"Oh...you fucking fairy," she groaned in a deep sigh, "never mind. Call him off…yes," she said into the phone and then she turned on me with fire in her eyes.
Eric's head snapped up the second he heard the relief in Pam's voice.
o-o-o-o
Never.
I'd never seen such a haunted look in his eyes before and I prayed that I would never see it again. He didn't blink; he just stared at me with those hollow eyes and blank expression. I vaguely noted hearing Pam leave the room, but all my focus was on Eric.
Dropping to my knees in front of him, I took his face in my hands and an even deeper terror filled my heart when he didn't move or even blink. I ran my thumbs over his cheeks and down his temples, "I'm so sorry Eric. I fell asleep. The healing...it wasn't what I expected, it…"
The words faded in my mouth as Eric awoke from his stupor and lunged at me with his fangs down, his fingers cruelly squeezed my upper arms and he dragged me up with him as he stood. "Where have you been?" he nearly yelled at me.
"Hana, at the inlet. I was there all day," I answered, my voice higher than normal because of how he was pulling me up onto my tiptoes to get my face closer to his.
"Do you have any idea…?" he began.
"Yes!" I cut in, "I'm completely aware of how badly I messed up and I know it won't change anything but I'm sorry. It wasn't at all like the last time, I…"
He shook me so hard my neck hurt, "No. No excuses. You told me you would be back here more than five hours ago. Five hours!" he yelled into my face, his lips pulled back in anger. "I have been waiting for you for every one of those minutes. I had no way of contacting you since you chose to leave your cell phone here. I had no way of feeling or hearing you. I had no way of knowing if you were even alive!" He let go of me and ran his fingers through his ragged hair, "I know nothing of your life in Hana. You've hidden those details from me. I don't know your friend's names or who might have been able to help locate you. I couldn't contact any vampires there because it was day and I wouldn't dare to do that anyway since if you were just sleeping or if you had been injured, it would only put you at more risk. The locator spell didn't work on you and the local Were had to drive an hour back to Hana to search for you."
I must have hit my head at some point because I said, "Why didn't you call the hotel? If you had, they would have sent someone down to look for me, even though no one ever goes there, it's still their property."
His eyes were so bright, they almost hurt to look at, "Why didn't I? Because I didn't think of it!" he yelled at me. "I am not in the habit of losing people I am responsible for. Most of them do what they tell me they will do so I am not left wondering what the hell happened to them!"
"I said that I was sorry!" I said back, the volume of my voice increasing to match his. "It's not like I planned this Eric. Perhaps my day wouldn't have sucked so bad if you hadn't poisoned me for a week and a half." I squeezed my eyes shut. No, I wasn't going to throw false accusations at him like he was doing to me. I took a deep breath, "I'm sorry, that was out of line. Please, let's calm down and think about this rationally."
Eric was right in my face again before I even saw him move. "Rational. You want rational. How's this for rational? You will not leave this building again without a guard with you at all times. You will always carry weapons with you rather than traveling in your fucking bathing suit or mostly naked as you apparently did today. You will never leave my sight without your cell phone on your body at all times and you will check in with me every thirty minutes, leaving me messages during the day so I know that you are okay. You will never go anywhere without me in the dark…"
"Eric!" I interrupted him, "listen to yourself…" I began again but he grabbed me again, harder this time, "Listen to myself?" he said, a crazed expression in his eyes, "I have been listening to myself Sookie, for five and a half hours. I had nothing else to listen to because you weren't here!"
I was sick of being yelled at, of being accused and threatened. I glared at him, looking for any sign that he would be calming down any time soon, but saw nothing but fury.
I wrenched my arms out of his grasp and moved back a few steps, "When you've calmed down, you can find me in the training room," I said and teleported back to the inlet, anger now my primary emotion.
I stood on the rocks overlooking the moonlit sand and tapped into the first and most important skill the Britlingens had taught me. Focusing on my skin cells, I called the tiny particles of the volcanic earth to me. I smiled as I felt the thin layer of particles almost small enough to be called dust join together to create a barrier over my skin starting at my feet and traveling up all the way to the middle of my neck.
I opened my eyes and looked down at my armor. I kicked a leg high in the air and felt the matrix of the form I had built flex with my every movement. I was pleased to see that Hawaii seemed to have an even higher level of labradorite in it, which added a slight blue sparkle to the duller orange/brown of the feldspar that made up most of my armor. When combined in this form of matrix, and held together by the will of my body, they made a defense system that was stronger and harder than both iron and silver but that flexed with my every movement like the most supple leather.
Only the male Britlingens could create the armor. The females wear a similar shell that was created by a male and if you can believe it, compared to what I had on, Clovache and Batanya's armor now appeared bulky to me. I ran a hand down my ribs to my hips, loving that something so incredibly strong could feel soft and smooth.
Despite months of work, the one thing I had consistently struggled with was making the helmet that accompanies the armor. I held out my hand and pictured creating a circular boundary with the volcanic fragments, forming the bowl of the helmet. It fell into place easily, just the right size as I had practiced it thousands of times. That was the easy part. The hard part for me was adding the exact right amount of heat to melt the minerals just enough to create a cohesive and immobile unit so that the helmet would take and keep shape.
"Fuck!" I yelled as I liquefied my third helmet into a pile of goo that looked like melted colored glass. This wasn't going to work; I was still too upset. I decided to abandon it all together and I teleported to the headquarters but went straight to the training room rather than back to Eric. A quick check told me that he was still fuming in his room and I needed to work off some aggression before I subjected myself to his anger again.
Will and Sheila were crouched over a small desk looking at papers and James was sitting on the floor working on a laptop when I arrived. It took only two seconds for all three of them to focus in on me.
Will immediately pulled out his cell phone and texted Eric telling him I was here. James approached me slowly, eyeing me curiously. I realized that I must present an incongruous sight with my tidy and easily recognized armor but my hair wild from healing in the ocean and drying in the sun on the beach. I watched as Sheila hurried to the elevator and went downstairs, responding to a summons by Eric.
"Sookie," James said cautiously, "Does Eric know you're here?" he asked.
"Yes," I answered. It wasn't a lie. He knew I was back, he's seen me and Will had just told him. He didn't have to know that I hadn't come straight here, although the ten-minute lapse in time would probably be a big tip off. I'd told Eric I would be up here because I didn't want to hurt him any further; we just needed some time apart to cool down.
James looked me up and down, surveying my armor, "You are Britlingen?" he asked.
"No," I said, "just trained by them." His eyes widened at that.
I walked past him into the weapons area and took down a long iron sword. I visualized the small particles that made up my armor pulling back from my index finger, doubling up in other areas, and it did, exposing up to the first knuckle. I ran the pad of my finger down the long, smooth blade. I felt nothing out of the ordinary so I turned the blade slightly and sliced my finger and then rebuilt the armor so quickly that James and Will only caught the scent of my blood for a split-second before it was contained. Inside the armor, I could feel the small cut bleeding and then healing. What I didn't feel was any negative effects from the iron in my bloodstream.
Eric would have been angry at me for my bold exploration, but I had to know if I would become sick or weak if I did get cut by iron and no matter how much he would argue, this was the only way to do it.
Satisfied, I found a helmet that fit me and then turned to Will and James, holding the sword. "I need a training partner for an hour or two. Any takers?" I asked.
Will had a sword in his hand in less than a second. "What is your skill level," he asked, allowing me to hear for the first time, his deep baritone voice with a very slight underlying accent.
I shrugged, "Against what population?" I asked.
"Skilled vampires," he answered as though I were a small, foolish child. I took a deep breath, trying to control the irritation that had me itching to strike out at anything that upset me in the least.
"Your guess is as good as mine. Take your best shot below the neck. My armor is impenetrable to any of these weapons, but I don't trust this helmet very much," I said with a shrug as I pulled my hair up into a bun and stuffed my head into the helmet.
I learned very quickly that fighting angry is a quick way to get myself killed. Will was not only skilled with the sword, but also excellent at strategy and reading my moves. Typically I was better, but tonight I simply wanted to fight out my aggression.
"Your footwork is acceptable and you handle the weapon well enough, but you are letting your emotions lead you straight into my blade," he said after his sword had thudded against my armor yet again, throwing me back a few steps and causing me to gasp to regain my breath.
"I thought you were supposed to be stronger today and that you were trained by the famed warriors from Britlin," he said spitefully and I felt my lip curl.
"My day didn't turn out exactly the way I anticipated, and yes, I was trained by the Britlingens, but only for a year and we had a lot to cover." He laughed derisively at me.
I jumped to defend myself; "I know I need work on weapons skills when facing vampires, why the fuck do you think I'm here with you? Most of my training was focused on killing someone before they got this close or without traditional weapons. If I remember correctly, you should shut your mouth since I didn't see you laughing last night."
He growled at me and let his fangs show a little. Gratified to have struck a nerve with that one, I smiled back at him nastily, "Ooh, scary," I said. I was royally pissed off now so I let a burst of fire leap from my hand into the open space to my side. "You put away your primary weapons," I said gesturing to his fangs, "and I'll put away mine," I said wiggling my fingers.
When he didn't respond, I turned away from him, "Maybe James wants to help me instead," I with saccharine sweetness in James' direction.
"No, I will continue your instruction," Will said flatly, "perhaps if you are more skilled, others around you will not have to give their lives for you." I gaped at him, who the fuck did he think he was? "Do you deny that you are a risk to those around you?" He demanded.
Damn, I'd hoped last night would have alleviated these concerns, "No, but I am also an asset as you saw last night." I answered forcefully.
"Good. Then prove it," he said forcefully. "Continue."
I almost balked, but whatever his methods, I would learn from him in the end, so I'd put up with it for now. One thing for sure I thought sarcastically, was that Will was a real fucking 'winner.' I couldn't wait to spend all my nights with him following us around, what fun we would have. I'd take Sheila or James as my guard any night over this cranky tight wad.
By the time we'd been at it for about thirty more minutes I'd worked most of my anger off and I was able to think a little more clearly. As I had calmed, I got better and better at keeping up with and occasionally surprising Will. No matter how much I disliked him, and to my great dismay, he was a very good instructor. At one point, after I managed to score a shallow slice to his side, I stood back from him and closed my eyes while taking a few deep breaths to try and take advantage of my now calm state so I could work on mastering myself and beating Will.
When I opened my eyes, Eric was in Will's place, holding his sword, and Will and James were already at the elevator.
Eric didn't look angry anymore and I refused to open my mind to him so I had to rely on his expressions and the tone of his voice to guide me.
"Care for a new sparring partner?" he asked and flicked the tip of his sword at me with a slight lift of his eyebrow.
I brought the tip of my blade to meet his, accepting his challenge and we began. I knew immediately that he was holding back, but since I was already giving it my all, I didn't complain. After all, I knew that it was imperative to defeat a vampire before it came to hand to hand combat.
Eric stopped us frequently to give me tips, not so much correcting my style or execution, but my timing and strategy. He was a huge proponent of me using my other powers to enhance my fighting techniques whereas I wanted to be able to defeat a vampire or fairy without relying on my extras since I'd learned that I could lose them at any given moment.
We worked side-by-side as student and teacher for a few hours, never addressing what had happened between us and never allowing emotion to interrupt our work.
Finally Eric hung up his sword and sat down on a soft stretching mat. I removed my helmet, mopped off my sweaty face with a towel and then willed all the tiny pieces of my armor to move to my hands. Cool air hit my sweaty body as I bent over the garbage can, placed my hands into the clean plastic liner and allowed the minerals to drop into the bag. I twisted the neck of the bag and pulled it out of the can. If I wanted to use the armor again, I would need to keep this handy or make a quick trip to get some more. Louisiana simply didn't have enough labradorite and fledspar to support the creation of the armor.
Eric was watching me closely so I thought of some comfortable sweats and a t-shirt in my closet and was a little more ready to go sit by him once I had some clothes on. It's not that I was embarrassed or modest, far from it actually; I just felt stronger and more capable when I was clothed.
A flash of deep red caught my eye and I wiped off the dried blood from my fingertip onto the damp towel, happy to see that the wound from the iron blade had healed perfectly.
I sat down on the mat a few feet from Eric and began to stretch. Eric didn't say a word, so I continued the relaxing cooling down routine I followed after every training or exercise session. It generally helped my mind as much as or more than my body so I gave it my all tonight.
I was stretching my shoulders when he finally spoke, "I know you didn't come home late on purpose. I should not have struck out at you in anger. Forgive me."
I dropped my hands back into my lap, "I will." Of course I would, "I know you lashed out because you were scared more than angry."
Eric's eyes flashed, "I wasn't scared Sookie," he said, and I almost called 'bullshit,' but he continued, "I was terrified."
I would have been surprised by his admission if I hadn't been privy to his emotions through our dream, that's why I knew just how much my unexplained absence for such a long time would upset him. Instead I just closed my eyes and nodded.
"Will you tell me what happened? I'll listen now," he said and I felt his fingers wind into mine and his thumb gently caress the side of my hand.
Of course I would, I'd do almost anything for him.
0-0-0-0
Later that morning, we returned to his bedroom and I prepared to slip into bed with him. I'd had enough, I needed some peace and the only way to ensure that I got it was to stay tucked in bed right here with Eric. I couldn't imagine that I'd have to be outside every day, a couple of times a week should suffice.
"What are you doing?" Eric asked me as he stripped out of his clothes and added them to the pile on the floor. We'd have to talk about that…what did he do, let his clothes pile up until he couldn't walk to his bed anymore? He didn't let a maid in and I was sure Pam didn't clean up after him so he had to do it sometime. But that was for another time.
"If you have to ask me that," I teased, "I've got my work cut out for me."
He smiled and then frowned at me when I peeled my shirt off and sand sprinkled down into his bed. "Oops," I said as I hopped out of the bed and tried to wipe the sand out. Unfortunately, all I managed to do was make the sand hop over onto his side of the bed.
"You can teach me anything you want, but you are not sleeping here today," he said firmly. He walked to the side of the room and opened a hidden panel, which revealed a wall of weapons of all description. He took down an iron dagger and a stake and placed them in a small satchel that he pulled from a compartment below the weapons. He placed the satchel on the bed, disconnected my cell phone from a charging cord and set it on the bed as well.
I raised an eyebrow at him. "Sheila is resting now, but she will meet you in my office at 11:23 AM," he said in a voice that told me he would tolerate no argument.
I tried anyway, "Oh, Eric, no. I can't take her with me. I'll just stay here today. That was my plan anyway. I feel fine, I don't need to go everyday, just once in a while."
Eric stepped closer to me, tilted my head back with one finger under my chin and kissed me. "Sookie, nothing would make me happier than to be able to keep you by my side at all times, but that is not possible. This is what you need to survive. I will let you go again," he said, his fingers trailing from my chin to the back of my neck where they cradled my head, "but you must promise me to take better care. It seems that despite the tongue lashing you received yesterday from your bloodline and the visit from your angry kin, you were not in peril...but I was. Take. Better. Care." Tears threatened to fill my eyes so I blinked them back and kissed his cheeks.
"I'm so sorry," I said again.
"I know," he answered, his blue eyes melting into mine, speaking volumes. That phrase, 'I know,' which for others might seem to be an offhand comment, had taken on deep significance for us. It meant that we understood the other, that we felt the other's deepest emotion and took it into ourselves, welcoming, accepting and forgiving.
"Thank you," I said and he kissed me lovingly in response. His hands finally caressed my body, holding me closer than usual, treasuring each inch of skin, every curve and point of heat.
His mouth broke from mine and he ran his nose up my temple into my hair, "You might not feel that my precautions are necessary for you, but they are vital for me. Please comply with them."
I nodded in acquiescence, realizing more clearly than ever before that Eric and I had created our own interdependent unit; just like the one I had with the sera fae and nature. What one of us did immediately affected the other.
Taking care of him and thus myself, keeping our little gear turning smoothly in the midst of the huge machine of our crazy lives was another responsibility I gladly accepted.
I took him by the hand to lead him to the shower to get clean while I showed him just how very vital he was to my survival.