CHAPTER THIRTY SIX – SO CLOSE TO THE END

Pst!!! It's not over yet! And I'm sorry terribly sorry for not updating sooner! Forgive me ;) and this chapter is kind of short as well. But I'm still writing, my lovelies. Don't worry. Read read and tell me what you think. I had to do this from a different POV because I was sure so many of you would have wanted to know what happened in between the last event and the next ;)

Ily Alice 3

Alexander

As I pulled into the Academy's parking lot, I thought of what I had just done; letting the scene replay in my mind.

"Diana, I can't do this anymore."

"What are you talking about, Alex?" the edge in her voice had grown. She'd just finished interrogating me about Rose and what she meant to me. I'd managed to convince her that I most definitely had not been cheating on her while I was at the Academy.

"I can't do this anymore, Diana. I can't do US, not like this." My voice was tense and I shifted myself away from her so we were no longer touching. "I…I can't be with you…anymore…I just can't do it…not like this."

Her voice got sharper. "What are you trying to say, Alex? Tell me right now."

"I can no longer be with you!" I exclaimed and I stood and began to pace in her room. I'd seen the hurt on Rose's face when Diana had said we were engaged and I couldn't stand to see that. I needed to get back to the Academy as soon as possible; I had to make it up to Rose. I had to.

"Alexander. Stop. Look at me and tell me the truth."

I stared at her directly in the eye and knelt down so we were on the same level, seeing completely eye to eye. "Diana Anne Kolvoikov, I love you but I do not love you in the same way I once did. I thought you were my world; once upon a time, I love you so dearly that I would do anything for you, anything in the entire world. But now…now this has changed. I've no right to say that anymore, because it is no longer true. I do not love you as greatly as I should, as you deserve. You deserve someone so much better than me, I've betrayed you in the worst way possible and I didn't do anything to stop it or even let you know.

"I still love you, but not as much as I used to, I love Rose Hathaway. When I met her she was just a child to me, a very, very well-known child whom was extremely talented. Rose Hathaway was known by everyone, you could not walk down a hallway in the entire Academy and not hear someone utter her name. She was so respected, she still is; all the students look up to her and admire her. She's earned her place in this world and instead of thinking of her as someone under my charge, I began to know her. Really know her.

"Rose and I would talk for hours and hours on end, sometimes about being a guardian and what she thought of it, sometimes about friends and sometimes she would let me in enough to share the darkest times of her life with me. Rose began to be my friend, a very good friend whom I could confide in, someone I knew would never judge me, no matter what my actions. Someone who knew the darkest places of this world, but someone who was still so good. She has no idea how good she is and she thinks that she is so very bad; it's as if every sin she commits hits her harder than it would anyone else, but it does not affect her as it would someone else. Rose rebounds, Rose fights and she gets stronger. I admired her for her strength and her determination. I admired her because she has been to places where even the sickest people cower from.

"Soon, Rose and I began to spend more time together and our friendship developed and I trusted her. I trust her with my life and I know she would lay her own down to save mine. I began to love her, at first it was a fatherly affection almost, an affection that a sibling or a close family member would harbor. But then it grew into more, it grew into so much more.

"Rose earned my respect, my friendship, my admiration and my love. Diana, I love Rose so much. Sometimes I feel as if I cannot bear to be around her because of the affect she has on me and what I will do. I fear her because of what I feel for her. I love her so much. Rosemarie Hathaway claims my heart and I can no longer love you because of it. I love her."

We were silent for the longest time, just staring into each other's eyes. Slowly, tears brimmed Diana's soft brown eyes and began to slip down her cheeks. But she did not sob; she let them fall silently as they landed on the floor between us. It seemed as if her tears were slowly building a wall that would separate us, I wall I knew I would not try to force away. I wall I would not fight.

"Alexander," she whispered. "You must know how I feel for you; you must know that I will love you for much time to come. You must know this."

I nodded slowly, but kept quiet.

"You know this and you are choosing her. Choosing one so young and so new to this world. But yet, she is vital to you. This I must know. I love you, Alexander Contrive."

That was her way of dismissing me so I silently rose to my feet, planted a light kiss on her forehead and left her house.

So as I pulled into the Academy, all I could think of now was Rose Hathaway. The women I had fallen so deeply in love with. I climbed out of the car and began walking toward the gym, where she would most likely be destroying something. On my way, I saw Mercutio. I jogged up behind him and called, "Mercutio, have you seen Rose?"

He stopped and turned around, smiling when he saw me. "Hello there, Contrive. No, I haven't seen your girl, what's she done this time?"

I laughed with him, glad to be back. "I don't know yet, but I do need to talk to her. I will see you later." With that, I jogged away and into the school. Some students called greetings to me, but none of theirs was as enthusiastic as the welcoming they gave Rose.

On my way to the cafeteria, I ran into Dereck Hays and his group.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Guardian Contrive, I wasn't paying attention." Dereck apologized sincerely and with respect. This surprised me; before Dereck would have glanced at me and kept on going without a second thought. Rose must have really cleaned him up. I smiled at the thought, but thinking of Rose, threw me back on task.

"That's quite alright," I smiled at him. "I'm actually glad that I've ran into you."

That came out wrong and Dereck winced as I regretted my words.

I softened my smile, putting my apology there. "Have you seen Rose?"

He shook his head slowly, a dark look passing over his face. "After she's done the field experience informative, she disappeared. But…no, I did see her. She was walking…Oh my God," his eyes widened in horror as he stared at something past me.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Leo Walker pushed through the group to come to Dereck's side. "Is Rose alright?" I could tell by the way he said her name that he, also, harbored affection for Rose; but not in the same way Dereck and I seemed to. At the thought of Dereck being with her, my lips pressed together but I watched as Dereck lifted his eyes to mine.

"She looked…she looked…son of a bitch," Dereck looked directly into my eyes and tried to send a message there, I figured because not everyone in the group knew about some of Rose's issues.

Suddenly, I got what Dereck was trying to pass on and I went cold all over.

"No…" I whispered and then focused on Dereck. "You don't think she would go, not today?"

The look he gave me told me exactly what he thought and I swore harshly under my breath in Russian. "Come with me, Hays," I turned on my heel without another word and began to stride away. A hand closed around my wrist and I looked over my shoulder irritably to see Leo Walker staring at me.

"Where ever you're going, so am I. If Rose is in trouble, I'm going to go help her." He narrowed his eyes and lowered his voice to say, "You are not the only one who cares about her and you are not the only one who knows things about her. I am coming with you."

"I can't argue this now, I need to go." I shook off his grip but didn't leave right away.

"I am coming too," Laura Tanner spoke up, stepping forward beside Leo. "If there's anything I can do to help Rose, then I'm going to do it."

"We're all coming," Madison said.

I shook my head. "There is no way I am taking the Moroi with me."

"So they stay," Leo said. "We go."

"I can't do this now, I need to go. Come if you must." Without another word, I took off at a dead run towards the guardian building with Dereck, Laura, Madison and Kevin in tow. I stalked past Mikhail, who was making himself a coffee and into the weapons room. "Get your ass moving, Tanner!" I shouted as I threw open the door and armed myself with a stake.

"Shit," I heard him swear and then louder. "Why? What's going on?"

"Rose!" was all I needed to yell before he was moving.

"Shit, shit, shit," he muttered as he thundered into the room, grabbing a stake. "What's she done?" he asked me in a low voice.

"You know of Dimitri, yes?"

"Fuck," he swore savagely. "She went without anyone?"

I caught the confused looks the young dhampirs were giving us and I shot a look to Mikhail which silenced him. With everyone armed, we quickly made our way to the gates.

Vincent, a young guardian was on guard as they were in the middle of switching shifts. He seemed relieved to see us.

"Vincent, did Rose Hathaway leave these gates today?" I demanded, staring into the gloom of the trees. I saw the bodies of Strigoi bordering the edge of the shadows and I swallowed.

"Yes, this morning, I am awaiting her return."

"Open the gates," I commanded and he immediately did as he was told. As soon as there was room, I slipped through the gates and ran towards the shadows. Dereck Hays was right beside me. I hesitated just inside the shadows, but I was only glimpsing the destruction that she had left behind. There were Strigoi bodies strewn everywhere, each one so very dead. Blood had soaked the snow, staining it red in such a violent contrast. Dereck didn't even break stride, he glanced around and tromped on deeper into the woods in search of our girl.

I followed him at a slower pace, with the others, taking in what she'd done. There was no way she could ever survive taking on this many Strigoi. She'd taken out them all, they were all dead. I walked on in awe at Rose Hathaway. This was impossible.

Suddenly, there was a chocked sound ahead and I looked up in time to see Dereck fall to his knees. "No…" he whispered brokenly. "Leo, help me," he called out weakly. I rushed forward with Leo and Mikhail to see what he did and I was not prepared for it.

There was a large body over Rose's broken form. Dereck shoved at it roughly, but it wouldn't budge. He bent his head close to the ground so his hair touched the snow. "Fucking hell," he whispered. "Look at this,"

I came up behind him and bent to see what was wrong. There was unmistakably the metal of a silver stake in between Rose's body and the Strigoi's. I sucked in a sharp breath and stared in horror.

Dereck seemed to collect himself, but was angry now. He seemed to know exactly what had happened but he also seemed able to control himself enough to do what needed to be done. "Someone help me lift it off of her," he hissed, not even bothering to acknowledge that it was a male Strigoi on top of Rose.

I moved back over to the other side of the two bodies and helped Dereck lift the body off her and toss it aside. I was stunned to see the stake protruding from her chest stained with blood but the most shocking part was that the stake was double-sided.

There was a collective gasp from our group as we stared at Rose's motionless body.

No, I thought in horror as I knelt down slowly. You can't be dead. You cannot be dead. YOU CANNOT BE DEAD!

Mikhail and I shared a look and I saw that there were tears in his eyes. Everyone seemed to be taking this hard, everyone except Leo Walker who had a game plan set and with a hopeful gleam in his eyes.

"Guys, form a circle around Guardian Contrive, Guardian Tanner and Dereck right now." He ordered in a low voice as he stationed back to us. "Don't stare at her as if she is a statue, she is alive. But just barely."

My head snapped up and I glared at the back of his head. I would not let him plant false hopes in my head. "How do you know that?" I demanded harshly.

"I just do, check her pulse it is there. But you need to pick her up and we need to get her out of here right now."

Listening to him, I gently placed my fingers on her throat, searching for a pulse. I found one. It was so faint; it might as well not have been there at all. Leo was right. "She's alive," I breathed out in relief.

"Not for long, pick her up. We need to go." The urgency in his voice was hard to deny and I found myself scouting the darkness with my eyes.

"Rose, baby, Rose, come on, you can hear me. You're alive, baby; you know it and you need to show me that you know I'm here. Come on, Rose, I won't be an ass in training anymore, I promise! Rose!" Dereck was gripping fists of snow and dirt, half whispering half sobbing into her ear.

"Dereck, pull it together," Leo said softly, but there was no doubt that he was serious. "If you want her to live, you need to pull it together." When Dereck kept whispering to his mentor, Leo swore under his breath and turned to kneel beside his friend. He pulled him gently away from Rose's body and whispered something into his ear that seemed to set Dereck right.

Leo straightened and resumed his defensive stance as Dereck looked up at me slowly. "You get her other side while Mikhail gets her legs, we need to save her."

I nodded slowly and Mikhail got in position by her knees. "One…two…three," I counted and we lifted her up at the same time. It was as if one of us had brought her back to life with our touch.

She gasped and went rigid in our arms, her eyes opening wide but so unfocused.

"ROSE!" we all screamed in unison, our eyes all on her.

"We need to move now," Leo said sharply. "Now."

We took his warning this time and ran Rose to the gates and they opened immediately.

"Is she alright?" Vincent asked franticly as he jogged behind us. We ignored him and rushed Rose into the clinic. People parted to let us through and they immediately took her into a room for surgery.

My God, Rose, I'm sure you had to do this right now. I thought vaguely as I sat down in a chair. My thoughts were blissfully blank…until a nurse came out, wringing her cap in her hands.

"Guardian Contrive," he addressed me, glancing at the group that had crowded around. "I need to tell you this…there…there is no easy way to say this." I lifted my head from my hands and stared at her. "Rose Hathaway…alright…Rose Hathaway's heart has stopped, but we are doing our best to revive her."