Chapter 38
Xander Clegane
She had her newborn son sleeping in her arms; looking at Sandor sparring with his men, it brought back memory when they were in King's Landing. She remembered in one of the tourney for Joffrey.
She heard her Uncle Tyrion hissed in pain as he saw the fight. She was gripping Bronn's upper hand, until the sellsword shook his head and told her off, "Your husband is at least one foot taller if not more than everybody else, he is fucking massive! And fucking fast! His opponent is a cunt...He is not going to loose...hey...LOOK!"
Leana looked up and let out a scream just as she saw Sandor was struck by a war hammer. She covered her mouth with her hand to stifle her shout. Fortunately it was not a sure struck. Sandor retaliated and the man fell. She glared at Bronn who was laughing at her and continued making bets – having the time of his life. Her sweet Uncle Tyrion was just tapping her hand to calm her down.
She hated tourney and the fights! That day she didn't make any bets. The second her husband bowed at the little prick Joffrey, marking the end of his fight; she practically run toward the tent and waited for him eagerly. She saw him took off his dog helmet and saw him fasten his pace as he saw her waiting for him; she saw a smile on his sweaty face – for her. He was pleased that she was waiting for him.
Sandor was not a Knight, he had no squire and no one attended to him, unlike his brother Gregor and other Knights who joined the match.
That night she begged him not to join anymore tourney as Sandor placed his winning on the table. "That is how I make my living, Leana." Calmly, he replied. He liked it that she cared for him, but this was his life.
"We have enough coins. You don't have to do this, please." Leana begged with her sad green eyes. "Please, Sandor, please..."
"It's expected of me and I love smashing those fucking gnats," as he felt Leana's gentle touch on his now bluish stomach from the war hammer earlier. He heard her whimpered for him.
Her son's cries woke her up from her day dream. She was back in Winterfell's courtyard, a fine sunny day for the northerners; her babe was swaddled comfortably in his fur blanket; Winter and Soot were sitting quietly by her side, soaking the heat from the sun.
She smiled at him in awe, she just nursed him few hours ago, she wasn't sure how often she should feed her babe, but her Aunt Cat said just feed him whenever he wanted to – the boy had an appetite!
"Are you hungry again, Xander?" She was about to leave the courtyard when she felt a shadow in front of her, she knew the shadow that was blocking her sun, she knew the smell of his sweat and body. She looked up at him.
Her husband was looking down at their squalling infant in her arms, "Sorry, he didn't mean to disturb your training," she realised how loud Xander could be. Arya flinched when she heard his screams but she kissed and cleaned him nevertheless, she was so good with Xander, even her Aunt Cat was looking at her daughter with wonder
"He is not disturbing us," he murmured to her.
Sandor took off his glove and tapped his son's nose. The squalling infant with a red face felt the gentle tap from his father, stopped his piercing screams and opened his eyes. Leana knew the drill. He wanted to hold him – as always.
Very gently he held him in his arms and looked into the boy's green eyes, his mother's eyes. His men knew their Master at arms well, since the boy was born, they saw the giant Hound sat on top of a barrel and looked at the boy, just looking – no word was spoken.
He was contented just looking at his boy, who would looked at him with his curious eyes. Sometimes the boy would smile, or sleep, or just looked at each other and sometimes he would cry to remind his father that he was hungry.
His babe would open his small mouth, contorted into different shapes, but no sound comes from it yet, apart from loud piercing screams – he was fascinated with him. He would wait for his smile which sometime he awarded him if he waited patiently enough.
Sandor Clegane wondered how come someone so small and helpless could command such love and affection from him. Here there were, away from King's Landing, away from the shit and Gregor, I am a father.
"My Lord," his man called him and he nodded at them. He was Sandor Clegane, Lord of White Knife, a vassal to Lord Eddard Stark, Lord of Winterfell; barely a few weeks after his son was born.
Only less than one month ago he met his boy, he could fit his small head in his palm and hold his body with one hand. He was growing like weed and he was most thankful for it.
His labour was long and hard, from the time Lady Catelyn Stark pushed him out from his own quarter until the time he heard Xander's cries, it was a long fucking three days; he couldn't believe she was fighting for her life for four days.
Lady Catelyn's Stark stayed with Leana - she did not leave her side until his babe was borne. He was with Leana on her first day of labour, until Lady Stark called for her husband and Robb to drag him out from his own chamber, because he started shouting at Maester Luwin.
The Stark men surrounded him with wine and brown ale, but he could still hear her scream and wail of pain, he'd cringed. Sometimes he could hear Lady Stark's voice, telling Leana to be brave and to keep on pushing. He could even hear the old Maester's voice. He fisted his hands every time he heard her wailed in pain. Her cries were torturous and they cut his heart.
On the fourth day, he saw Lady Catelyn Stark talked to her husband at the courtyard, she looked pale and tired – He dropped whatever he had in his arms and he stormed to Leana...thinking of the worse, only to see blood, bloodied sheets and the old Maester holding Leana's hand; there was so much blood around her and on her thighs; Leana was half asleep, exhausted but tormented in her pain.
He grabbed a wet cloth and wiped sweat on Leana. She was drenched in them. He whispered to her, "Please Leana, don't leave me...be brave...please, be brave..." He couldn't imagine what Benjen Stark went through when he lost his wife twenty years ago.
He heard a commotion and saw Lady Stark, along with wolf girl and a maid, bringing in bucket of boiling water, seconds later he was chased by the fierce Lady Stark. Only this time, she grabbed his hand and she told him to pray for his wife if he believed in the Gods.
Sandor Clegane exited his chamber...he saw the old man gently tried to wake his wife again, shaking her shoulder and calling her name. He could hear the love the old man had and concern for her. The Maester said to her that it's not much longer until she had her babe in her arms.
Sandor Clegane never pray in his life, not even when his face was burned and he was in so much pain. Jon Snow saw his face and, "What is it? What did Lady Stark Said to you?"
"To pray..."
Jon Snow looked at him for some time and they started hearing Leana's scream of pain again before, "Come with me."
He had no jazz left in him, his knees felt weak and he couldn't think, he followed Jon Snow like a lost dog.
Jon Snow took him to the Godswood, a dark and grim forest, very different from any woods he'd even been, it's like they were untouched by human's hands for centuries. It was not far from Winterfell's Keep. He saw it every day for the past few months from the tower.
They walked for a short while and reached a very dense part of the woods and he saw a small pool of black water, next to it stood a tree, "This is the heart tree...my lord father took me here...to pray, to be alone, to be with my thought...they've...been good to me..." Jon Snow's voice faltered as he touched the trunk.
He looked at the tree with a face on its trunk; it looked strangely sad and twisted but wise. For the first time in his life Sandor Clegane felt small and useless, he was nothing. He was but a speck of dust.
"I'll leave you here...I'll be...around," Jon Snow said to him before he left him.
The Hound kneeled and for the first time in his life he prayed. He asked for forgiveness for all the souls he had taken, he prayed for Gregor's and his parents' soul, he prayed for his sanity and most of all he begged mercy for the life of his wife and his child.
He heard rustled of leaves and he opened his eyes and he saw her...he saw 'White', looking at him. He recognised her marking, White was pure white, but she had a very distinctive mark on her black nose. He loved Leana's White beast...He thought he'd gone mad and was fucking dreaming. He couldn't move, frozen in place.
He wanted to touch the dire wolf which he killed but he couldn't, the white dire wolf come closer to him, she was only inches away - he could almost felt and hear her breath...until her nose touched his lips, he could feel her cold nose when suddenly...
He was disturbed by loud ringing bell, he turned his head in surprise for just one fucking second and White was gone. He was looking into trees and red leaves. He cursed like a son of a bitch for the sudden annoying bell before, he heard Jon Snow shouting for him. He heard the bastard called for him like a man who was about to lose his head.
Then he heard him clearly, "It's the bell! CLEGANE! It's the bell! LEANA! It's the fucking bell! HURRY! CLEGANE! LEANA! YOU DOG!HURRY DOG! HURRY!" Jon snow cursed before the bastard run toward the Keep, leaving him behind. First time the bloody bastard called him a dog!
A jolt in his stomach, Leana...his child is borne! Sandor Clegane run like his life depended on it, following Jon Snow who was also running toward the great keep of Winterfell. Out from the Godswood, they could hear the bell louder, saw people from the village walking slowly toward their keep. He saw Jon Snow cheerful face while he was still running and he broke a fucking smile on his gnarly face.
The bell constant ringing was loud now they were almost at the gate, but his heart sang along with the fucking bell. He could barely hear the sentries and guards congratulating him...all he did was run and they cheered for him.
He knocked over some poor servants in a bid to enter the tower, he heard Jon Snow knocked over a bench and cursed in pain. Sandor Clegane could hear loud piercing noise that was supposed to be a cry from a babe, it was more of loud angry piercing wail than what he imagined a babe cries.
Then he saw Lord Stark waiting for him in front of the stairs' landing, the man looked jolly and said to him, "You are late Clegane," before he hugged him and said, "You are a father now – no longer a Dog. Remember that Clegane. You are a father! GO!"
He didn't remember entering their quarter; he was told off by the Maester later on that he almost gave him a heart attack when he ripped the door of its hinged!
All he remembered was Leana was holding their child. She looked so darned happy, with her bundle of screaming joy in her arms, "It's a boy." She proudly said to him.
No word was spoken, it was only the small screaming infant in his arms, he thought it would be awkward as he never held a babe before, but no, it felt fucking right. Then he saw his son opened his eyes and shut his mouth for a few seconds.
For that few seconds, he saw Leana's eyes on the boy, bright green eyes looking at him, stealing his heart, right away mending his chipped soul, digging him out from his own grave where he hid his entire life... They boy had dark brown curl, just like him.
The tranquillity didn't last more than few measly seconds, after his boy decided he'd seen enough of his beloved father, he opened his mouth and he started screaming again.
"He is hungry," he heard Lady Stark voice, felt her hand on him. He didn't realised she was standing next to him; she looked tired and she was looking at his son.
He saw his beloved wife extended her arms to him, eager to have their newborn back in her arms. Leana looked like a woman who went to seven hells and back for their son. He gave the boy to her and she placed his mouth on her nipple for him to suckle and few seconds later, they could hear...silence – until they hear gentle suckling noise from the babe.
He kissed Leana's head and whispered thank you to her, before he stood up and grab Lady Catelyn and hugged her tight, murmuring in her ears, 'thank you' over and over and over again.
Lord Eddard Stark heard him whispered to his Lady wife; "You are the only woman in the whole fucking Westeros who could chase me out from my own chamber and lived." before he kissed her cheeks and hugged her for a long while.
From the corner of his eyes, he saw Jon Snow who was brimming with smile, he looked darn happy, standing by the door less frame as he rubbed his shin.
He looked for the Maester and held the man till the Maester started coughing; the following week the Maester was surprised to find a new door for his working chamber. When he asked Lord Stark about it the man said that Clegane thought of it when he repaired his own door.
Sandor remembered the bell rang for three bloody days and he wasn't bothered by it. He made sure Leana was bathed and resting before he left her.
Lady Catelyn Stark was surprised when he told her that he didn't need help from the servants, and he'd help Leana bathed himself. In their chamber, after the servants scrubbed the dried blood and changed the sheet; he carried her sweating and bloodied body and gently lowered her to the bath tub in their chamber.
He saw her closed her eyes in bliss as she rested her head on his arm, she fell asleep in the tub. He couldn't stop kissing her head and he helped her washed her hair. Nosy 'wolf girl' was at his door along with Simon, knocked incessantly as she told him that he forgot cloth to dry her cousin. He couldn't get mad at her, she helped Leana birthed their babe.
That very night, after all of the excitement...their son was sleeping beside his mother, he was so very small but strong at the same time. He couldn't stop looking at him. I have a son. He looked at his wife one more time, resting so peacefully and comfortable, not a care in the world, and a small smile on her pale face.
TBC
Thank you for waiting so patiently to wait for their babe, I hope it is worth the wait...Tell me, is it worth the wait? I am so in love with Xander already.
Dear DorkySoul...enjoy...hope this make your essay a lot less painful. Cheers,
THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU for the review posted: The Unfamiliar, DorkySoul, Guest, melkS, Lightan117, RedSmileyFace and Firedew (thanks for the input!)