Martha let the Doctor just talk for a while. His voice was calm, but rather then telling her anything that would help him, he instead discussed Time Lord energy and how being low it would slow down Imogen's healing and growth. He agreed with their assessment to raise her medication but warned them yet again to watch her for a sudden temperature increase. Martha looked calmly at her watch as he tried to lift his arm and got frustrated he couldn't. Only ten minutes had passed.

"If you want out of those restraints you are going to have to actually talk to me." Martha commented as she flipped to a new page.

"I am talking," He replied indignantly.

"And while I agree that the topic you chose is important, I want to hear about you, not Imogen. I need to understand why you decided that you didn't need the pills," Martha looked over the clipboard at him and he adverted his eyes. "And telling me that you are a Time Lord is not going to be good enough."

"I am a Time Lord." He glanced at her, smiling weakly.

"So explain to me and make me understand why that means you don't need the pills. Nothing that you say here leaves this room. Everything will just remain between the two of us." Martha stated. He considered Martha's words before he began to speak.

"I was never a very good Time Lord," The Doctor began softly. He looked down at the floor rather then Martha as he talked. "I was the second child of four. My older brothers and sister were loomed and genetically perfect in every way. They were stronger telepaths, faster and smarter. I was born three years after my sister and it was immediately made clear that I would never live up to their standards. For one thing I wasn't loomed, I was one of the few Time Lords born naturally. Though my family cared for me as a child, it was my mother who protected me and I was always closer to her then my father. My father use to tell me that I would only bring honor to the family by getting a job at the academy and raising a family with the wife that was prearranged for me before I could even walk."

"I've told you before that at the age of eight we were taken from our families to join the academy. At the academy we were not only taught science, history and math. We were also taught that as Time Lords we were suppose to be better then the common Gallifreyans. Sex, and love were beneath us as well as anything that didn't improve our minds." Martha noticed him trying to lift his hand again. She stood up and unhooked his hand with the bandaged wrist, before sitting down again. He smiled at her gratefully as he reached up and rubbed the back of his neck.

"It was while at the academy that I... I became like this for the first time." Martha made a note that he avoided the word depressed but let him continue. "I quickly learned that while it was a recognized problem on Gallifrey, it was not something a Time Lord suffered. I was informed that if I had been loomed like the rest, I wouldn't have the defect." He went quiet.

"So you learned how to hide the fact that you were depressed rather then learning to deal with your depression. That was wrong of them. Even on Earth we recognize that being depressed isn't a weakness." Martha concluded.

"I studied harder at the academy, but I still fell behind. I spent a lot of time in detention for failing test and classes. When I graduated from the Academy I still owed them hundreds of detentions."

"And none of the detentions were from you causing trouble?" He smiled sheepishly at her.

"Academy life was strict. We were told when to wake up, eat, go to class, study and sleep, there was little to no free time. Koschei was my roommate at the academy and he would wake me in the middle of the night to run and explore. We learned almost every piece of that Academy and one day we were going to explore the stars together." The Doctor smiled fondly at the memory.

"So what happened?"

"We were children. After I left the academy, I was married and settled down to raise three boys. We didn't agree on how to raise them though and before my youngest entered the academy, she took ours sons and left. By then Koschei had all ready ran away from Gallifrey and so I worked. It was after my granddaughter was born that I finally stole the TARDIS and left Gallifrey." Tears filled his eyes. "Are we done?"

"For now, when we come back though I want to discuss your family more." Martha commented as she stood up.

"Why? They are gone Martha, I lost them during the war." He hissed softly.

"That is why you need to discuss them. They meant a lot to you and talking about your family, can help you deal with their loss." Martha removed the strap from his other arm and rather then stand up he sat there frozen. He didn't want to think about his family but the memories were flooding back.

His youngest son had been killed on the field in front of him. He was shot through both hearts and was dead before he could regenerate. When he finally destroyed Gallifrey, his other two sons had been in the Citadel waiting for the decision of the council. His mother was council member. His father was missing at that point a long with his granddaughter Susan and his best fried Koschei. Even though he hadn't been on the planet, due to the device he had used to destroy it, he had still been forced to watch the planet burn.

When he came back to reality he was sitting on Jack's lap on the floor in the small room, clinging to his husband. Jack's shirt was soaking wet and the Doctor felt as though he just wanted to crawl into bed and sleep for the next hundred years. He didn't fight Jack off but he didn't deserve to be comforted. He deserved to be strapped back in the chair and locked in a room alone for the rest of eternity.