Strategy de la Whip

Selina's POV:

The only consequence that I had to suffer so far was being required to date this 'Joker' guy. Other than that, karma was really taking her time on making me pay for my misdeed. I spent the majority of that day shopping and spent the night dancing my beautiful ass off at one of the local nightclubs. Not Myself Tonight was stuck in my head on my way back to the manor. I had a kick-ass day.

Once home, I had a dinner of pesto with basil and garlic bread all cooked and collaborated by the old butler, Alfred. Yeah, I finally got it. I knew that I had to start opening up to my honey about my whereabouts if this relationship was going to work out okay. For the past few days I'd been distancing myself a bit, not that it was on purpose, but it was more due to the fact that I was just so damn busy. Not necessarily in the 'work' sense, however, since I resigned and all, but more in the 'breaking into this new body by going out and having fun' sense.

I was careful. I didn't sleep around the whole city, just out of the little actual respect that I had for the actual Dian. I may have technically had two boyfriends, but so did Dian, and these were the same two men she was screwing anyways. So, no crime was being committed there!

I couldn't help but wish that she was at least taking care of me, and not just letting my body rot and wither away out on some street curb. I knew that I had destroyed a part of her, but there was no turning back. The deed was done, and all she could do now was accept this, just like I had been since the start of this.

"How was work, Dian?" Bruce chipped in while knifing into the thick garlic bread that was fresh out of the oven, compliments of Alfred. "Um, it was cool. We, uh, finished that 'assignment' that I told you about." I sighed and hoped that sounded feasible. He absentmindedly nodded in response, then took a seat across from me.

"That's nice. So, I was thinking, after dinner I am going out to patrol, since I have neglected to do that for the past four days. Crime hasn't been too off the charts, as Gordon claims, but we still can't afford to let our guard down. Not to mention the Joker is still at large, and we really need to get to tracking his ass down-"

"Joker?!" I choked, literally almost choking on my mouthful of pasta. Holy shit. He shot me a weary look and nodded. "Well, yeah, we have yet to find him, of course. We can't just let him run loose. He's far too wild to be free."

Oh man...should I have told him? I knew this 'Joker' fella didn't play for the good team, but I didn't think that he was...famous for it. I decided to keep silent. Why? Hell if I know. I think that I may have felt some sort of fucked up attraction for the weirdo. He was great in bed, after all.

"Anyways, I was wondering if maybe you'd want to consider joining me, you know, in your gear. It's been nearly three months since you've, well, been Wonder."

Had it? What made Dian quit? I'd have never guessed that she chickened out of her vigilante duties. What a puss!

"Oh, yeah, Bruce. I think you're right. I should get back into the act." I stood and headed for the sink, abruptly placing my dish in there and making my way for the exit. "I'm going to get ready, see ya in a bit, sweetie." He giggled an "okay, then" in response.

Once in her room I threw open the closet and began to search for my 'Wonder' suit. It surely wasn't in plain sight, indicating that Dian truly had forfeited the duty for some time. That was about to change. I was gonna make helluva hero out there, especially with the knowledge and expertise of how Catwoman would deal with her baddies.

I found the red and blue garment buried underneath a few sweaters deep in her closet by a pair of old and worn sneakers. I snatched it up from off the floor and shook the dust off it it. I couldn't hold down a smirk of excitement while I skipped over to the tall mirror by the doorway.

I stripped down to nothing but my white n' lacy panties and pulled on the stretchy and durable suit. It fit like a charm. I looked into the mirror and fell in love. Damn, was I sexy! This lingerie of wear had really done well in showing off my lean and toned hips, and the strapless upper half of it allowed some cleavage to be on display, which would play its part phenomenally in distracting the enemy, if male or lesbo, that is, which was likely the case anyway.

I dug through her closet some more and found some nice 3 inch black heels to go along with my appealing getup. I loosened up my tresses from the fishtail braid it was formerly in and let me hair flow wild and free as I strutted out if the bedroom, feeling hot as ever.

Brucie was no longer in the kitchen, but it didn't take a genius to figure out where he was at the moment. I waited patiently by the front door for my man to hurry up and get his suit together so we could hit the streets! I was amped up! It would be just like old times, except a little different now that I was using another body to pursue the acts of heroism in this screwy city. Other than that, this was going to be a blast.

Some time later my Batman strolled down the staircase looking fabulous in his stygian gear, dressed from head to toe in all black armor and padding. He looked ready to kick some ass!

"Ready?" I asked innocently, as he stared at me as if I were like a goddess or something. I couldn't blame him, for I was prepped to the hilt. He mumbled a "yup" in his dark and raspy tone, probably practicing for later use, and we headed out for the Batmobile. My stomach fluttered in pure joy for the ride that was to come. Hell yes! This was going to rock!

He opened up the weird door for me, it having lifted itself up in an odd angle, but allowing me plenty of room to hop inside and get adjusted. Once he was in, he closed it up and began to drive. I was jittery with enthusiasm. I had not been so excited since the night of the swap.

"Alright, now, you have your gun and mace, right? And it's all loaded and ready?" my overprotective guy asked from beside me, as I rolled my eyes and nodded in response.

Little did he know that I had also brought another little weapon for use, but only if absolutely necessary, of course.

I didn't really feel like we were traveling too fast, but I knew we were. Nor Bruce or Batman were fans of slow and steady driving. They lived for the illegal speed, much like myself. Batman was more silent and reclusive that Bruce. I didn't frown upon it either. Honestly, I found the serious and hushed Batman to be far more sexy than the talkative billionaire who owned a widespread Enterprise corps or whatever. His dark and down-to-business attitude always made me wet!

"So, what exactly is the goal here?" I piped in after a good five minutes of nothing. "I'm going to check out the Northern region's abandoned buildings- apartments, houses, shops- anywhere the Joker may be hiding, if he is presumably, still here in Gotham."

"And what about little old me? Do I just tag along with you?" I kinda teased this, but he remained stoic and under control, not even the slightest smirk having played along his revealed lips.

"No, I don't want you to run into him again. Not after what happened last time. I want you as far away from the Clown as possible. You can keep watch over the Western region by the bank and shops located over there."

Well! Looked like he thought I was weak! Going along with that cheap stereotype that girls are incapable and vulnerable to all dangers out there! Better safe than sorry? My ass!

I shrugged and went along with his pathetic approach anyhow. I would just do things my way once he was out doing his own thing. When we stopped he handed me a small, black communicator device and told me to contact him on anything I witness that is out of the ordinary. Please, I could handle myself, thanks. I nodded, fighting the urge to roll my eyes at such hopelessness. I planted a quick smooch on his cheek and stepped out of the cool-ass drive. He then sped away in a flash, leaving me be.

I was alone on the sidewalk now, being surrounded by not much more than the lit up shops behind me and across the streets and some passersby. Well, time to get to work, I guessed. I made my way down this walkway, not really even sure of where the hell I was going, but not really caring much at the same time. I just hoped that I'd run into at least something exciting tonight even if it was-

A robbery at 7-11! Yay! My time to shine! I hurried over to the scene of people stampeding out of the small store, as I was just feet away. The cops had yet to show up, to my lucky stars. I was confident and all too ready for this. I peered in through the glass and saw two young guys stuffing random merchandise (chips and beef jerky, for instance) into pillow cases. The cashier was being held at gunpoint by some other young man at the check-out counter. Oh, what fun this would be!

I snuck in past the final helpless citizen to rush out of the place in a frenzied panic, as if he'd just witnessed a live exorcism. A bunch of pansied pussies, that's what they were. I was out of view from the man with the gun off to the right at the checkout, holding some helpless middle aged man hostage. My goal now was to find out what these two amateur nimrods thought they were doing.

Their backs were turned to me when I was just feet behind them. I could hear them laughing and giggling like faggots while stuffing their bags full of all kinds of shit. Geez, these guys couldn't have been much over twenty.

"Shit, man, you sure this is a good idea?" one loser asked the other.

"Fuck yeah, dude, we're almost done here, anyways," the other dork chipped in, very correct with his statement.

"Ahem." I crossed my arms and glared at the two criminal rookies. They shot around and stared me down. They looked shocked at the sight of me, and I knew that they had to be turned on as well. I had my cleavage on full display for their horny eyes to feast on, hence the 'distraction mechanism' that was bound to work beautifully and to full accord.

Suddenly, the two grinned and appeared relaxed, as if they had thought that I wasn't a threat. I just hoped that they realized how wrong they were.

"Hey...you look familiar," the guy with blue eyes, some facial hair, a blue knit cap and baggy gray jacket with torn jeans spoke. I stepped in closer, my hands now on my hips, looking purposefully seductive. That was my expertise, after all.

"Do I?" I asked lightly with a hint of innocence. I had to do all I could to throw them off before the big onslaught to come. They both appeared very chill and unthreatened, irking me just a little. I sure as hell was a threat, dammit!

The other chortled and smacked the his partner in crime's arm. This one was dressed similarly with his hood up with dark green sweatpants and an eyebrow piercing. Both were caucasian and in their early twenties.

"Duh, dude, that's like the Batman's sidekick, the Wonder chick, or somethin' like that."

I rolled my eyes and took another step towards Beavis and Butt-Head. It was time to put an end to this nonsense.

"OK, Harry and Marv, you've had your fun, now it's time to give it up and do the time for your failed little crime."

The one with the blue hat continued to smirk with too much valor, while the other now had a dumbfounded gaze on, as if confused. "Harry and Marv?" the ignorant one muttered, apparently oblivious to my reference on one of the greatest Christmas movies of all time…

"Home Alone," the thief beside him whispered.

"Now on a more serious note, you two have the right to remain silent." I strutted up to the two, while they shot me gazes that were fearless enough to make me just a teeny bit nervous.

"She's a cute little thing. We should throw her in the bag along with the other shit, huh, Max?" the blue-capped moron suggested, while his dull buddy nodded in response. I was glad that they had yet to see what was coming.

I smiled to show my own flamboyance. I was not their bitch, they were my bitches, about to be at mercy and on their knees pleading for cessation for what was about to be enacted. Fuck the police, I had this.

I reached behind me and loosened up my weapon from its holster. This was gonna be fun. "Anything you say can and will be used against you...by my whip." I unravelled my toy and allowed the length of it to unwind, the end of it hit the floor. Not even I can remember where the hell I got that thing, but I was just glad that I had it. It really came in handy in cases like this.

They remained unfazed, the fools. "Hmmph, look, man, she has a whip to 'torture' us with," blue hat teased, while the other dipshit piped in "this is gonna be hotter than I thought."

For me, maybe.

"You two ought to know better than to think that you can get away with a crime such as this," I spoke with a hint of subtlety in my voice. There was no more quiver present, because I knew that I'd be winning this one.

"Right, Max, grab the chick and let's beat it-"

I pounced for the speaker before me and to the polished floor we went. It was time to put my weapon to use. I got in straddle position, to mock him, of course, and not so much for my own sexual pleasure.

"Hey, what? Ya can't wait till we're outta here-" I cut him off with a snap of my lovely leather rope down onto his chest, a yasp of agony escaping him. "Jesus Christ! What the fuck-" I brought my whip down onto him again, this time with more force. I didn't favor his rudeness. I continued my gesture another time, his friend standing bewildered aside from me with his hands shaking in his hoodies pockets.

"Shit, Max! Stop her! YOW!" I was quick to strike the man above harshly on his right ankle, and he shouted and collapsed down instantly thereafter. This was really getting entertaining. Now I had two men to whip the shit out of!

I rose to my feet and brought my whip down on the guy in the hoodie, it having cut through the material and left a red mark that bled freshly in response. I then turned my attention back to the brains of the duo, thrashing my possession down above his beltline, managing to rip open the cloth and cut into his skin. Whoa, this was cool! It really brought back memories, and good ones too.

"Fuck, please-"

Whip.

"Oh my God-"

Whip.

"I'll - I'll turn myself in-"

Whip.

Back and forth I went, each of the two getting their fair share, more and more bloodshed and tearing of clothes to follow. Tsk tsk, shoulda behaved, smh. The babies were now wailing while laying helpless on the floor, getting covered in bruises and long, gnarly marks on their now revealed skin. Their bitching and moaning had gotten the attention of the gunman at the front, for he was now just around the aisle yelling, "hey!"

A gun versus a whip isn't for a good match, especially since he was a good twenty feet away, and bullets can outstretch a whip's length by far. Lucky for me, the cops had shown up around the front, their headlights having shone flashing blue and red through the large window at the entrance. His attention had been turned to the front, while I could make a break for it. I ducked while scrambling towards the back of the place, past the freezer section and magazine rack, to the EXIT door conveniently located there. I was through it in an instant, and in the alley behind the building. In other words, safe haven.

That was close.