Britney

Cody Simpson

I felt as if I was outside of my own body.

"We will contact you in the morning," I heard the officer say, "Her parents were not able to be reached. Your parents are home right? Her info sheet has your family as the emergency contact."

"Yes, thank you," I heard Cody reply.

All if I could feel was Cody's hand wrapped around my waist. Other than that, I was numb. Everything I was seeing was as if through tunnel vision. All I could hear we're the faint voices of the people around me, mixed with the monotone of my heart beat beating in my ears.

I barely remember leaving the police station, walking to the car or getting into the back seat and laying down.

"Brit?" I heard my name echoing around my head… Brit… Britney… Brit…

"Britney!" I heard a shout, snapping my eyes open to a bright, blinding light. I let my eyes adjust and looked around me without moving, seeing Cody hovering above me.

I tried to respond, but all that came out was a small mumble.

"Let's go inside," he hushed, sweeping my hair away in comfort.

I tried to get up, but I guess it wasn't working because Cody lifted me up and tucked me into his arms. I felt him carry me through my front door, through my house, up to my room and set me on my bed.

"Sweetheart," he said, flicking on the lights.

I mumbled again, trying to speak. I just didn't have the energy or the feeling.

"Angel," he tried again, "Would you like to shower?"

Luckily, I could still nod because Cody then helped me up.

"Will you come in with me?" I more mumbled than spoke.

"Bathing suits again?" he asked and even though I was not present with my sight, I could hear him smiling, which only broke my heart a little bit more.

I nodded again and he rifled through my drawer, retrieving my swimsuit and his. The memory can flooding back of when he left his here after we had gone to the beach. That was the day he had taught me to surf.

"Can you put it on yourself?"

"Ya," I moaned, staggering towards my bathroom.

I changed, slowly but surely, and opened the door to see a shirtless Cody. It surprisingly didn't effect me as much as it usually did.

He brushed by me and turned on the shower, making sure it was just right. He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me over, under the pouring water.

I let it run over me, standing there, staring at my feet.

He stood there too, making sure I was still alive no doubt. We hadn't spoken in weeks, and now he was acting as if we were back to normal. I don't even know what normal feels like anymore. I don't remember it either. And it was only hours ago that I existed as normal.

"Why are you helping me?" I blurted out without a single thought to back it up.

He looked at me, puzzled, "What do you mean?"

"We broke up because I cheated on you. Remember, you yelled at me and told me it was over." I let my eyes drift back to my feet.

"That was just the moment, I was angry partially because of that," he paused and sighed, "and something else happened that day too."

All I could manage was a pathetic, "Oh," leaving us in silence.

I guess he wanted to let me know what, because he continued moments later, "Kylie threatened Alli. They were both competing for this modeling spot and Alli was so much closer apparently. So, Kylie threatened Alli that she would make her life hell if she didn't drop out. So, Alli did what she wanted to. She stayed and actually got the spot. Kylie was so angry, she photoshopped a photo of Alli and spread it around within the tabloids."

"I'm sorry," I uttered. I had no idea. I understood now. The Cody I knew would have tried to forgive me, even if it took a lot of work, he would.

After those words, we fell back into our familiar silence.

Silence was my worst enemy at the moment. It gave me time to think and I didn't want to think. I wanted to have music blasted in my ears just so I wouldn't have to listen to my own thoughts.

But of course, the memory came flooding in…

I felt his lips sucking and smashing against mine as his hands ran through my hair.

"Hey," he said between kisses, "Why don't we do it here?"

I kept kissing him, but didn't want to, knowing this was going to get weird.

"No, I'm not ready," I said, not breaking our make out position.

"Come on," he said, and I could feel his hand creeping up my thigh, reaching the hem of my dress.

I slapped my hand down onto his and removed it, "No, I'm not going to."

"Come on babe," he started to suck on my neck in more of a frenzy than an intimate way.

This time, I broke it up and scooted away from him on the couch, "No, Kaiden, I'm not going to."

Those words were swirling around in my head, making my eyes start to water again. Or that may have been the steam wrapping around me like a suffocating blanket. I also realized... Someone was shaking my shoulder. I was so out of it, I didn't feel as if I was in my own body. I was a spirit watching everything around me like a movie.

"Brit!" snapped me out of it, making me "awake" and gasp as if I was in a terrible nightmare.

"Are you okay?" asked Cody, his hand on my shoulder and his head ducked to look me in the eyes.

I nodded and closed my eyes tightly, trying to erase the memory, with no such luck.

"Come on," he said and turning the knob of the shower, shutting off the water, "You can lay in bed and I will go get you some food."

"Ok," I whispered, barely audible through the thick steam.

"Come with me," he grasped my hand and lead me back to my room. He grabbed me a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, handing me them and walking out the door, "I'll be back in a few minutes."

I heard him leave as I stood there, dripping wet and holding a bundle of cloth in my hand. I stared at it, angered at it. No one would understand why, unless they knew what was swirling in my head.

Everything. Around. Me. Reminded. Me. Of. Him.

I don't know what came over me, but I threw the clothes across the room, hitting the wall with a soft thud. I don't remember anything after that. Maybe I blacked out, but I do remember that somehow I was sobbing and yelling, looking around at my entire wardrobe and room trashed. I fell to the floor and clutched my knees to my chest, letting my sobs and tears pour out of me. Something I desperately needed.

I felt Cody come in soon after, his footsteps shaking the floor. All I could do was hear. My eyes were clamped shut and I was curled into a ball on the floor.

I heard him swear under his breath and what sounded like an indecisive sigh. He walked over, kneeling next to me and picking me up and walking out of my room.

"Cody, stop," I stirred, trying to get away, "Put me down... Stop... Stop..."

"STOP!" I nearly screeched. This made him listen and put me back on the ground, this time in the living room.

The tears flowed even more and I couldn't contain it anymore. I had to get it out. It may have been sudden, but ti needed to b released.

"Don't touch me. Everytime someone touches me or looks at me or even breathes next to me, I want to breakdown and tear something to shreds. No one gets it. No one. I was RAPED. No one can change that fact. No one can undo it with a wave of a wand or a simple spell. I want to die because of what Kaiden did to me. He kept pushing me… kissing me and feeling me… pushing me to my limit and still forced me to do it. He did things to me that I never thought I would have to deal with. I kept screaming 'stop' and 'no' and 'please don't'. But nothing worked. He still did it," I thrust my hands wildly around me and let the tears fall, I was rambling, not thinking about how unorganized it sounded, "Every time I close my eyes, I see his face above me. His eyes looking at me, pure evil cast inside of them. Everytime that it is silent, I can hear myself whimpering and him just thrusting harder. I can hear his jagged breathing and my pounding heart, racing with fear. All I think about is what if he had killed me after? What if he had done worse? I don't think- no, I am not the person I was. I have changed. In one freaking night, I have changed. I can't handle all of this. And worst of all? I blame myself for this. If I hadn't cheated on you with him, I probably would never have had to deal with him. I wouldn't be like this. I would still be myself, and I would still be with you, and I wouldn't have been r... ra... Raped." I stuttered out those last words.

I just sat there, half expecting a lecture and half expecting Cody to just walk away and leave. But instead… he wrapped his arms around me. He hugged me. I could feel him crying, his tears falling onto my shoulder. He held me like that for what felt like hours. He just rocked me back and forth until we stopped crying. We were just… there.

That was when I knew...

I wasn't alone in this.

It had been three weeks since then.

Kaiden was in jail.

Cody and I were back together.

And I was getting better.

I still have the nightmare occasionally… but I know that it wont happen again. I have Cody to protect and be there for me. I was even becoming more like my old self.

So, tonight, I was at his concert. Another one. He was on stage at the moment, finishing up Good As It Gets.

"Hey guys!" I heard him say once the song ended. The crowd was immediately caught with their attention. "I have a new song I would like to play for you. I wrote it for a girl in my life, who recently has been going through some hard times. And I wanted to let her know... That... I'm here for her and that she isn't alone in her fight."

I walked to the edge of the stage, still concealed by the curtain, but I could see Cody starting to strum. I knew what was happening.

Darling, I know your hearts seen better times,

I know our songs had better rhymes,

Before today, Nooo

Darling, yeahhh yeah,

I guess you made the wrong mistakes,

I understand if you need your space,

Please take your time,

Before you go away, so far away,

You need to realize,

Baby it's not just you,

You know it hurts me too,

Watching you leave,

With tears on your sleeve,

Notice that mine aren't exactly dry,

Baby it's not just you,

That's hurting,

Its me too.

…

The song ended and I saw him look to me and smile. Only then did I realize I had tears streaming down my cheeks. He then said goodbye to the fans, thanking them for being there and made his was backstage.

He and I bee-lined for each other, getting caught up in each others arms. We couldn't be bothered. I was caught in the moment.

I knew, then and there, that he was meant to be in my life. You know how people say they have guardian angels up in heaven? Well, only he is my guardian, but I am his angel.

Authors Note!

Hey guys :) whats up? I havent posted in so long! I feel horrible. But, good thing is... Im posting! Lol, and i have more too. Not just this one, so get excited!

Anyways, thanks for sticking with me through everything.

later guys:)