A/N: I am so glad that you guys loved the last chapter! :) Hopefully this one explains why Tobias is so ready to go to war. With 5,360 words, it's the longest chapter in the story so far, so just think of Theo James talking to a younger Theo James if you have trouble getting through it lol Please enjoy!

36. Stories

ALEX

Slowly, my father releases my arm, but he doesn't look at me. He might be angry at me, disappointed even. I'm not sure I'm ready to hear it. But needing to know whether he plans to help me or not, I follow him as he walks over to the balcony where we've had so many conversations before. I'd even say it's our spot.

A gush of the cold, night wind hits our faces as we step outside, and for a minute we just stand there looking at the city below us. At first his silence puzzles me, but not long after I come to realize that whatever it is that my father has to tell me, it must be difficult for him to say. Eventually, he grabs on to the rail with both hands as he leans into it, and then, releasing a heavy breath, he begins.

He tells me a horrible story. A story about corruption, mind control and genocide. He tells me that my mother was brave, that she went back into harm's way to save him and that together they stopped a vicious attack. He tells me of their refuge in Amity and the plans they made to take back the city, but my mother couldn't be a part of it because she was pregnant, and leaving her behind was the hardest thing he has ever had to do. He tells me about the raid on their camp and he explains how and why people remember a storm that never actually happened instead of the war or the vile deeds carried out by the Erudite all those years ago. I'm shaking by the time he gets to the part where I realize that the woman in Rae's story was our mother, and that Anna and I are only alive because of Rae and our grandmother.

When I find myself trying to wrap my mind around the fact that this city has been living a lie for seventeen years, my jaw clenches tight with anger because I've been living that lie. A lie that my own parents made me believe. They've always told me to be honest, and my father once promised me that my secrets were safe with him, but he's been lying to me my entire life. How is that even remotely fair?

"Why are you only telling me this now?" I ask angrily, even before my father has finished. "Did you think you couldn't trust us with it? Or that we wouldn't be able to handle it?"

"I've never doubted your ability to act in difficult situations, Alex," he says. And even though I'm mad at him his words provoke a small sense of pride inside me. "I just wanted you all to have as normal a life as possible," he adds.

"By keeping the truth from us?!" I demand incredulously.

"You don't understand," he argues. "I walked these halls for two years in fear that one day someone would figure out what I was. Everywhere I went I felt like someone was watching, and I watched my nightmares turn to reality when they went from quietly picking off Divergents one by one to war and mass murder. Then I was forced to live in a world full of people who have no memory of it all. You don't know what that feels like. The truth is a burden that I didn't wish for you or your sister to bear. What do you really think you would have done if you had known?"

"I don't know…." I say. I hold my head, trying to let all of this sink in. Maybe he's right. Maybe I would have passed most of the few years that I've lived looking over my shoulder or locking Annabelle in her room. Maybe my ignorance is what made me enjoy life. So why do I still feel betrayed?

"I just didn't know that we were keeping things from each other," I say softly.

"I didn't either," he says. And as usual, I realize that my words are hypocritical. He must be upset that I never told him about Abby.

"So what's changed?" I ask him, wondering why the sudden honesty on his part.

"You first," he counters.

As I stare out into the open, I lean into the rail and say honestly, "I need your help. I promised Abby that I'd always be there as long as it's what she wants, and I meant it. But if at any point it becomes too dangerous I'm afraid I won't be able to keep that promise, because I won't risk her life. She doesn't want me to leave Dauntless, but as far as I know that may be our only option." I turn to face him. "I'd like a different one. I'm here to call in my favour."

Smiling lightly, my father raises an eyebrow and says, "What exactly did you have in mind?"

"There are still a few days of initiation left. I need you to help me get her into Dauntless."

He huffs at this. "That's way above even my head, Alex," he says.

"But you're on the council, dad," I argue. "It doesn't get much higher than that."

"I'm not the council's sole member," he says. "And asides from Zeke, nobody else is going to let that happen, since allowing her to switch factions after she has already chosen breaks every fundamental law under which the city is governed." And shaking his head he adds, "For as long as it exists factional law will remain untouchable, and unless the founders were to resurrect and say so themselves, there is not a person in this city who could counteract that."

I sink into myself, like I've been deflated. Mercilessly, his words put to rest every trace of hope that I had managed to muster on the way over here. "So you can't help me," I say, sounding defeated.

"I didn't say that," he says firmly, and he stands a little straighter.

I press my eyebrows together. "What other option is there?" I ask.

"We make factional law inexistent," he plainly suggests, as if I weren't confused enough already. It shows, and seeing this he says, "Allow me to elaborate."

"Please."

He nods and I listen intently when he begins. "The reason Zeke and I accepted to sit on the council as representatives of Dauntless was so that we could keep an eye on the situation in the city," he says. "Just in case history ever repeated itself, we'd be there to catch it this time."

"I thought you said that you had killed all of those responsible?"

"We did," he replies. "But the Erudite themselves weren't the problem. The problem is the system. Because of the great significance the Erudite give to knowledge, they eventually become cold, calculated. They stop seeing human beings and in its place they just see chemicals and probabilities and statistics. Their faction ideals ultimately cause them to trade empathy for logic." He pauses. "The same can be said for the rest of the factions. The Dauntless in pursuit of bravery have become cruel. The Amity in pursuit of peace have become passive. The Candor have lost all tact and consideration in the name of honesty, and as for the Abnegation," he says with a slight chuckle, "Well they've just lost their damn minds."

"We knew it wouldn't take long for the next generation to make the same mistakes, draw the same conclusions about the factions and the Divergent," he continues. "So we wanted to take it down, form a new society, but we couldn't. The Dauntless were too loyal to the system and they were a huge part of our efforts. And after the memory serum was released it was a lost cause. The only other option was to take it down by force. Your grandmother was adamant that we did."

"But you couldn't do that," I say with understanding. "You'd be taking away people's right to choose and you'd have had an uprising, to say the least."

"Exactly," he says. "We're not the only ones living in this city, so we decided to wait." Shaking his head he adds, "At first, I was sure that the Erudite would rise up again, especially after they got their hands on Jeanine Matthews' information. But for some reason they still haven't. So then I figured that we'd wait until the people showed signs of discontent with the faction system. I figured that with time they would come to see how much this system takes away from them, and that they'd cry out for change or liberty, and then we could reform the rebellion. It's why I taught you all how to fight, and why I showed you every back door on this compound, making sure you knew how to get in and out without being seen. I needed you all to be able to defend yourselves if this city ever fell apart again."

I look at my father with disbelief. All my life I've questioned why he has never voiced his opinions on our government. I've questioned the danger in my divergence, my preparedness for my initiation, the way my parents have always insisted that we uphold the rules of our faction, and I realize I've misjudged them this entire time. It's not that they were paranoid, or that they were cowering in fear. They've been patiently waiting all this time for the opportune moment to strike back.

"And has it?" I ask my father, suddenly wondering if my rebellion is one of many.

"Not enough," he says with evident disappointment. "It's still all the same. The system has brainwashed the majority, and the rest are too afraid to speak out. I'm starting to realize that no matter how long we wait, no matter how many more times the Erudite attack, because they will try again, people will always choose the factions because change is too hard."

I nod a little. That sounds a lot like what Abby told me about why she had gone back to Amity. She told me that she had fought change until she couldn't anymore. She told me she had lost that fight only because she loved me more than she was afraid of change. And If she can do it, then so can everybody else.

"Maybe they have to want it bad enough to fight for it," I say.

My father shakes his head and says to me, "That is only true for some. Even after Jeanine had killed off half the Abnegation and every Divergent she ever got her hands on in the name of control and experiments, the majority of the people of this city held on to the factions for dear life as if it were their own mother, because they couldn't see themselves without it. It's why we were trying to get as much information as possible on the Erudite experiments before bringing them down," he explains. "I trusted that evidence of the truth would have been enough to sway the people because I wanted to believe that there was a more peaceful way to unite this city, tear down our divisions. But after seventeen years on the council, and seeing how each faction puts the fear of God in its members, I'm not sure there is. I'm not sure they'll ever want it bad enough."

"Are you saying that you're prepared to hijack the city? It'll be a war," I say, disconcerted. The need for change is indisputable, but at the cost of how many lives? And if there is one thing my father is not, it's a heartless tyrant.

"I'm saying that I'm willing to… For the right reason," he says, and he looks at me as if waiting for an answer. As I'm wondering what it is exactly that he's asking me I think I figure it out, but then I decide that it cannot possibly be that so I think again only to come back to the same conclusion. My mouth falls open and I almost don't hear myself when I finally say, "You're leaving this up to me..."

He says nothing. His silence is affirmative.

"Are you kidding me?" I almost shout, pushing myself off the rail. "That's a bit dramatic don't you think? You can't get my girlfriend into Dauntless, but you can take down the entire faction system? How much sense does that make?!" This time I do shout. I'm so furious that I seem to have lost my senses. As much as I've given him the occasional sass, I've never dared to yell at my father.

"It makes plenty sense," he says levelly. The tone of his voice is so calm that it's frightening. "Within the confines of the law I can't do a damn thing. The only way around it is to overthrow it."

My eyes square in on his. "Do you have any idea what you're asking me though?"

"What I'm asking you is are you willing to go to war for her. Because what you're doing is treason, Alex, and treason is punishable by death." His jaw clenches. "If you want to be with her, this is the only way that happens."

I scoff loudly. This is definitely not the favour I came here to ask.

"No, it's not," I seethe bitterly. "If that's the case then I'll just go back to option number one. I prefer to be factionless than be responsible for the deaths of countless people. Because what you're really asking me is for permission to endanger the lives of my friends, my family, everybody else who decides to fight with us, and not to mention every other person who gets in our way all so that I could be with Abigail. You don't get to ask me that, dad. That's not a simple question."

"Well then here's the only simple question that you need to answer." And he asks me, "Do you love her?"

"Of course I do," I say without hesitation.

"Then you're not going anywhere," he scowls at me. "I don't know what you think you know about living factionless. If you knew anything at all, you'd never subject the woman you love to that."

"Well then I'll stay," I say, heated, "and then I'll find a way to be with her."

"And then you will get caught, Alex!" my father yells. His fingers squeeze around the rail of the balcony until his knuckles are white. "There are people everywhere looking at everything that everybody does. One day, someone will see you. And they will come for you. And there will be a war. Because I will not let them kill my son," he says fervidly. "And what you need to understand is that even if they don't catch you, there will be a war. But not at my hand, at yours." He fixes his eyes on mine and says, "Because I know you. I know that one day you'll get tired of hiding. One day you'll want more than the options they've given you. One day you'll want to marry her and you'll want a family, and they won't let you do that, and you won't take no for answer."

I violently tear my eyes away from his, feeling as though he was looking into the deepest parts of my soul and seeing everything that I have ever wanted since the day I met Abigail. I try to swallow the anger that his words provoked, because deep down inside me I know he's right, and the Dauntless in me would tear away anything that dared to try and separate me from Abigail. I love her, and I will have her, because nothing else matters.

And it's in that moment that I realize just how my father has been able to live seventeen more years under the system that almost took everything away from him. He's had his family and we were all he's ever needed. We were more important to him than his own freedom. What drove him to yield is what will eventually drive me to fight; love.

"Alex…," my father says softly. "Look at me." I do. "I'm sorry that I've made this your decision to make. Honestly, I wish I didn't have to," he says gently. "As much as the factions are flawed and the city needs change, being the one who incites that change is a heavy burden to bear because of all that comes along with it. So if you say no, I'll understand. But I wouldn't have suggested this unless I was absolutely certain that one day or another, it would be the only choice that either of us would make. And if it is that it's yours, I'd rather it be when I'm still able to help you fight."

My father's eyes are honest as he takes breath after breath of the cold, night air. He's fought for this city before, and he's always tried to do right by the people who live in it. If he were to wage war against the factions, I would fight with him in a heartbeat. But why should anybody choose to fight with me? I'm not nearly as honourable as my father, and my fight would not be about anybody else's freedom. It would be about mine and Abigail's.

Feeling more than a bit ashamed of myself I quietly admit, "I think you should know that if I say yes, I wouldn't be fighting for the city. I'd be fighting for Abby."

Levelly my father says, "And if you say no and they take you from me, I wouldn't be fighting for the city. I'd be fighting for you."

"Exactly how selfish is that though?" I ask him.

"It's very selfish," he says, and he rests a hand on my shoulder. "But if it makes you feel any better, it also serves a greater purpose."

He smiles faintly, and my Abnegation slightly composes itself at the thought that this is bigger than me and Abigail. Still, I nod hesitantly, unsure that doing the right thing for the wrong reason is still the right thing. Abby might say that it's not the right thing to do at all. As much as she has changed, she is still Amity and war goes against everything she believes in. She won't like this at all.

"Just give me some time to think, ok?" I say to my father quietly. Although, I doubt that all the time in the world would make this any easier.

"Ok," he says.

And just then the lights flick on. I turn around only to see my mother closing the front door behind her. She grins wide when her eyes catch sight of me and after throwing her purse in the couch she runs out on the balcony. Laughing, she wraps her arms tight around me. "Alex," she sings sweetly, smiling into my chest. "I've missed you so much."

Squeezing her just as tightly I say, "I've missed you too." It's been too long since I've last visited home.

My mother looks up at me and I swear there's a strength in her eyes that I never saw before. It makes a flood of emotions rush through me, now knowing all that she's been through and all that she's done, and it's like I'm seeing her for the first time, like I'm looking at her with a fresh pair of eyes. My father has always been invincible to me. How is it that I missed that my mother was just as strong? That she is the reason why he can be strong? I can't help but feel like I've taken her for granted.

Bringing her closer, I lean into her ear and I whisper, "I love you, mom."

"I love you too," she whispers back against my chest but she pulls away quickly. Her eyes dart between my own and my father's when she sees the tension on his face, and the confused look on her own makes me realize that he hasn't told her yet.

"What's wrong?" She asks nervously as she continues to look at us both, suddenly aware of the heaviness in the mood.

"Come on," I say to her and I gently take her hand in mine. "Walk with me."

She looks at my father who nods approvingly, and together my mother and I walk through the door.

We walk and we talk about the story that my father had just told me, and then I tell her the story of how I fell in love with a beautiful Amity girl named Abigail, a girl that I can't ever imagine my life without. I tell her the offer that has been laid on the table for me, and I confess that although all of me is ready and willing to fight for Abby, it feels selfish that I should ask everybody else to.

I'm not sure how far or how long we walked, or which route we took to get here, but we're outside. The moon is so bright that it lights up the city streets, and I can see way off into the distance. The very top of the old buildings are painted white as they attempt to touch the night sky. The city looks peaceful, its streets quiet and calm.

All of that might change soon.

"Could you imagine there being enough people in the city to fill all these buildings?" my mother asks me as she gazes at the large, broken down structures that surround us on every side. "We're just a speck of how big the world used to be," she says.

"They're all gone now... because of a war," I say grimly. Five minutes ago I was almost certain that change was the right thing for this city, no matter what it took. And now the charred, empty buildings are screaming at me, asking me to reconsider.

Suddenly she stops walking, and turning to face me my mother asks, "What do you think they were fighting for?"

"I don't know," I shrug, still staring off. "But if our messed up faction system is better than whatever they had before then I can't imagine how ruthless these people were."

"I don't think our system is better," my mother says, shaking her head. "I think it's exactly the same. In the end, the product is segregation, arrogance, indifference, all things that lead to war. They fought each other because they weren't united the same way we aren't."

My mother looks up at me as she wraps her arms around me. I smile down at her gently. I'm much taller than she is, but her embrace is just as comforting as it was when I was a little boy, when I could still fit in her arms, back when she was cradling me and not the other way around.

"I understand that," I say to her. "I understand that as long as our city is divided the way it is, one day or another it will fall apart again whether I have a say in it or not. I understand that people will die no matter what I'm fighting for. I'm not running away from a fight, mom," I say with a slight shrug. "I just don't want to be the reason for it. I can't let you and dad and everybody else risk your lives just because I can't get what I want. If something happened to any of you I'd never forgive myself."

Death is an unavoidable part of war, of life, and that's ok. But it's not the same when someone dies and when someone dies because of you.

My mother searches my face and smiles with recognition when she says, "Do you remember when you told me about the fear in your fear landscape that you didn't know how to beat?"

I nod. How could I not remember? I'm living it right now.

"What did I tell you?" she asks me.

"You told me that the people who love me are willing to fight for me just as much as I'm willing to fight for the people I love," I say with a small smile, already knowing where she's going with this. Somehow, my mother always knows exactly what to say.

"Exactly," she says. "And we can't stop you from fighting for Abigail any more than you can stop us from fighting for you."

I hold my mother tighter, tighter than I think I've ever held her, and with tears in my eyes I admit, "I'm just not ready to lose any of you."

My mother presses a palm into my cheek and says, "Wars have been fought for lesser things than freedom and love, Alex. And if I'm gonna die fighting then I'd rather it be because I was fighting for my son." She smiles a little. "And you know what the Abnegation say about that?"

"What?" I ask.

"They say that when someone wants to sacrifice themself for you, if that sacrifice is the ultimate way for that person to show you that they love you, then you should let them do it, even if it's selfish. They say that it is the greatest gift you can give them." And her eyes gloss over with tears when she says, "It's what my parents did for me."

I never knew how my grandparents died before tonight when my father told me, but I always knew that they loved my mother as much as she loved them, as much as she loves us.

"And they're right," my mother continues, the tears now falling from her eyes. "Because nothing would make me happier than to die if it meant that you could live and live freely... So let us fight for you."

With a heaviness in my heart and wiping away her tears, I nod and I softly say, "Ok."

She smiles and rests her head on my chest, and I hear a soft laugh escape her lips when she says, "But don't worry too much. You should know by now that your father and I are pretty hard to kill."

I press a kiss to her forehead, and I look up at the night sky praying with every fibre of my being that that fact always remains true.

I walk my mother home before heading back to my apartment. I think until I can't anymore, wondering just how I'll explain all of this to Abigail. I walk slowly and with my hands deep in my pockets as if the answer were somehow hidden there.

I open the door and she's already standing there, waiting for me. Her eyes are swollen and they pierce into mine as she waits for an answer. Before I say a word I take her into my arms and kiss her hair. I breathe in deep before pulling away, hoping that the sweet scent of her will ground me. But when I look into her troubled eyes, I'm still unsure of how to begin, so then I just do.

I recount my father's position, explaining how and why he came to it, and then I explain my own. Abby understands most of it. She understands that faction before blood must go. It's the inevitable death and chaos part that her Amity just won't let her swallow.

She fights with me. She pleads with me. She wants to wait. But I tell her that a city that fails to see its own captivity will never cry out for change. It will never be enough, not for another hundred years. And quite frankly I don't think I could wait that long to be with her.

She yields.

Abby collapses deeper into my arms as she cries apologies into my chest. The fact that she thinks that she has anything at all to apologize for breaks me. I pull away from where she clutches at my shirt and I bend my knees a little to meet her eyes but she turns away.

"Abby, this isn't your fault," I say, dejected, knowing that she only thinks it is because she didn't choose Dauntless, an option that I had selfishly presented. When she says nothing, I sternly say, "I mean it," demanding her attention. I take her chin into my palm and I gently tug it toward me. "Abby, look at me," I say. I need her to understand this before we ever go through with it. Firmly I say, "None of this is your fault."

"Yes it is," she then sobs softly. "I could have prevented all of this. If I had chosen differently-"

"If you had chosen differently, then we would have had to fight a different day and for a different reason," I interrupt. "But there still would have been a fight to be had, Abby. We're slaves to a system that tells us what to do, who to be..." and looking deeply into her eyes I say, "…and who to love. Nothing and no one should have that power over us. And you shouldn't have to change who you are just so that we could be together. We deserve to be free. We all do. So, no, this is not your fault."

When I'm sure that she understands that, I press my lips to hers. And for just a moment I don't feel as selfish anymore, because my father was right and this is bigger than us. By fighting for each other, we're fighting for our city. For the first time tonight my Dauntless and my Abnegation are at peace.

"One day people will tell stories about us," I say, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "About a beautiful Amity girl and the unsuspecting Dauntless boy that fell hopelessly in love with her."

Abby smiles sweetly. "It is a beautiful story," she whispers.

"Yeah it is," I say.

"I remember when I was little my mother used to always tell me her favourite love story," Abby says, wrapping one arm around my waist as we slowly make our way to the bedroom.

"Yeah?" I ask. "What was it about?"

"It was about a princess and her prince who lived in a world ruled by five great kingdoms. They were from the warrior kingdom, and the princess was strong, stronger than anyone. But just when another kingdom attacked, led by their evil queen, the princess found out that she was gonna have a baby, and it wasn't safe for her to fight anymore. And so, the prince sought out the best nurse in the land to take care of his princess and he found her a tiny magical fairy to keep them all safe. Then he set out to rid the world of the evil queen so that the princess and their baby could be safe."

I sit gently on the bed, pulling her into my lap. "And did he? What happens in the end?"

"The other kingdom attacked again, and the evil queen cast a spell on them so that the prince and the princess wouldn't remember each other. My mom didn't know the ending but she always said that she was so sure that they'd find each other and that their love was so strong that the minute they saw each other it would break the spell and they would remember. She said she could feel somehow that they were together and their baby was safe."

"That's a beautiful story," I say. It actually sounds a lot like the story my dad told me, save the magical fairy and another couple details. "I know a story just like it," I tell her. "Wanna hear it?"

She nods.

As I tell her the story, I realize that for the first time, there are no blank spaces. It's the most beautiful story she's ever heard, and it's the most beautiful story I've ever told. I tell her the story of a love so strong that it survived the worst, a story of two people who found each other at exactly the right moment and saved each other time and time again. I tell her the love story of Four and Tris.

A/N: So a lot happened in this long chapter, story and character development wise, and unfortunately I can't address it all in a short A/N :( If there are any questions/doubts about certain things, please PM/Review and I most definitely will reply :)

Please let me know what you thought of this chapter! :)